Celebrating so many things during the last week. We are overwhelmed with the abundance of love and light in our lives. This week has been absolutely beautiful. Of course, there have been the terrifying moments with blood pressure scares, medication scares, insurance bs, white coat's being a pain in the butt. However, the silver linings have been so bright and sparkly that we need sunglasses at night. (I know you are singing in your head now.)

Steve really turned a corner this week. He sits in his chair less, goes on more walks, is remembering details he couldn't remember the day before. There have also been scary moments. We went on a "longer" walk, half a mile, and his blood pressure went to 78/49. Turns out Steve's heart doesn't like to be warm and gets easily dehydrated. He stayed in the air conditioning and guzzled an electrolyte supplement and slowly the blood pressure returned to normal. We've had to cut one of his heart drugs in half, again. 

We haven't had a cardiologist for the last two weeks and it's been incredibly unnerving. Steve has 2 good insurance policies but the one in first position isn't accepted by his cardiologist. However, because it's in first position the second one won't work (which they do take). This system is so messed up and it makes my blood pressure go through the roof. 

Steve is still not driving and we do need to have a neurology work up as there are some pretty big memory gaps and he still struggles with short term memory as well as losing words and gets confused doing bigger tasks. 

We met with social security and all the paperwork for disability has been submitted. We are praying for a quick answer. He has 16 different diagnoses related to his heart failure and his prognosis is so varied as most suffering a widowmaker combined with 23 codes do not survive this long. 

My bestie, Kim, arrived last Saturday morning and offered the reprieve we both needed. Friends that nap together, stay together! I so wish I had a photo of the 3 of us snuggled and curled into our living room chairs, fast asleep, for an afternoon nap. She fed us, walked with me, and provided the strength and reassurance needed to rebuild our endurance. For the first time since my parents left, I slept through the night. There's just something about having another body in the house that calms me to place where I can relax enough to sleep. We were so grateful to have her here.

Our week turned extra special on Tuesday when friends we met in Puerto Penasco rolled in for a pit stop on their journey home. Sometimes God gives us a gift we didn't know we needed. Darrell and Ariel are incredibly special and we have so much in common that it gets a little weird. Ariel is a breastie as well and our journey's are very similar. We have the same scars and our birthdays are just 2 days apart. Today we get to celebrate her and we are so grateful to have them in our lives. New old friends are the best. The ones you meet and you are sure you've know each other your whole life. Such a gift. 

We have had wonderful days floating in the pool. Creating amazing dinners. Sharing laughter, stories and many hugs. They are on a journey that Steve and I have been trying to get on. Nine months on the road. Traveling wherever they are taken. Darrell takes Steve on his errands and Ariel's extra set of hands helps me with all the house tasks. They clean the pool and provide the laughter and celebration of life we crave. We listen to their travel stories with awe and are inspired to get back on the road as soon as possible. Each night we have a nightcap on the patio and crack up to the new Season 1 of Ted. 

To top off our week, sweet Jenna, arrives today! No more sleeps. YAY! We are beyond excited. I start my new job on Monday. This amazing girl is giving up her first week of summer to come and help. Since my training schedule is Monday-Friday she will be here to hang with her dad. I can't think of better medicine for my Loverson's heart. 

We have fallen into a fairly predictable routine. Having visitors has helped both of us from succumbing to the lurking depression that would like to pull us in. We are refusing to go there but we offer ourselves the grace to do and to be who we need to be. The darkness of the situation is real, however, we try incredibly hard to focus on the silver linings. We buoy up to them to stay afloat. They are the water wings needed in order to survive. We take it moment to moment. Celebrate when we can and let the tears fall when they need to escape. We are constantly overwhelmed by the love and support we receive and are grateful beyond words.

Steve's best buddies are playing in a golf tournament that he's been a part of for years and years. They have been calling, texting photos, FaceTiming and the joy on his face is priceless. Knowing you are loved is the best gift EVER!

We have no idea what adventures we will be on tomorrow but there is enough for today. Enough for this moment. That is all we are promised. We continue to lean hard into all the twists and turns that life throws at us. That we've made it this far is a miracle. Do we need to talk about the fact that we have a "couples" CaringBridge site? I mean, FOR THE LOVE! LOL. For us, laughter is easier than tears.

We are in a bit of a holding pattern. Steve will have another echo at the beginning of June. We will be back at the cardiologist soon to get an update. We wears the LifeVest until July 3 and then they will have the data needed to decide if he's a candidate for a pacemaker. In the meantime, he's to stay quiet and cool. Luckily, Arizona weather is cooperating and we won't hit 100 for another 2 weeks. 

Thank you all again for the outpouring of love. We love and appreciate you all so much.

#lovewins