Dearest Friends,

The dreaded day finally came. Steve passed away peacefully this morning at the age of 69. The disease he had worked so hard to conquer finally overcame him. 

Steve spent the last 40 days of his life in a hospital critical care unit, followed by a skilled nursing facility, and finally in hospice. I wish we had been able to take him back one more time to the dream house he built for us and to listen to the rushing waterfall and admire the screened porch he so enjoyed, but it was not meant to be.

It was almost a year ago that an accidental fall led to an emergency room visit and a doctor saying, ‘you have a spot on your lung,’ leading finally (after endless tests and specialists) to a diagnosis of Stage IV lung cancer. As always, he followed every instruction willingly, knew every nurse’s name, and bought candy for the oncologist’s office staff. But chemotherapy is brutal, and it took a real toll on him both physically and mentally. He may have thought that it was unfair for a nonsmoker to have this disease, but he perservered. Unfortunately, as he finished chemo, he was hospitalized with pneumonia, and then a month later contracted double pneumonia, which did tremendous damage to his lungs. The wonderful staff at the hospital and the nursing home tried their hardest, but ultimately, he lost his battle.

Steve and I met in church and though it took a little while for us to work up the mutual courage to go out, it was clear to us both that we were meant to be together. We celebrated our 25th anniversary this summer. Many of you were part of the epic celebration eight years ago when we were finally able to wed legally. Like every real relationship, we had our challenges, but never doubted that our futures were interconnected. We visited 36 countries together, celebrated our trials and successes, and ended every week with champagne. I will miss that so much.

Both of us could not have made it this far without the love and support that all of you have provided. It has been overwhelming and humbling – literally hundreds of messages – but we always knew that we were not on this journey alone. Now I take the next step with that support.

Right now, the pain of losing Steve is so intense that I cannot imagine how I will make it, but I know I will, because he will always be with me and because you will continue to show your love and concern.  But it will take time, and I know you will be patient with me.

Steve was the nicest person I have ever known. He was an example for all of us follow. Thank you for everything. 

A memorial will be held later in the year, and I will let you know the details when they are final.