Dear friends,

I always knew, at some point, it would be necessary  to write Laurie's final entry on CaringBridge. Well, I was wrong. She wrote it before she left, and well in advance. To those who knew her, that's no surprise. In what follows you'll recognize her hand and her heart in its composition and appeals. 

Before I share that with you I want to say how much I appreciate the kindness that was consistently reflected in the responses to Laurie's writing. She really did have  an evangelist's heart and above all else wanted to share with you her heart and unwavering affection for Jesus. He changed her throughout the course of her illness and made her into His own glorious reflection. I don't remember a single day she did not greet with joy and hopefulness. And at the end, that Joy carried her home...

Nowell+

Boo's Eulogy

MY EULOGY: (Feel free to edit, to use or to not use. Whatever you think is best.)

“Brothers and sisters, we do not want you to be uninformed about those who sleep in death, so that you do not grieve like the rest of mankind, who have no hope. For we believe that Jesus died and rose again, and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in Him. According to the LORD’S word, we tell you that we who are still alive, who are left until the coming of the LORD, will certainly not precede those who have fallen asleep. For the LORD Himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the LORD in the air. And so we will be with the LORD forever. Therefore encourage one another with these words.”  1 Thessalonians 4:13-18 

It’s quite an extraordinary thing to get to write your own eulogy. But what better way to say what you want to say. Parting words, hopefully filled with a little wisdom of life lessons learned along the way. Not to mention...you do get the last word. My family can appreciate the humor in that.  

Battling multiple myeloma over these past years, I’ve had lots of time to think and reflect. Having a terminal illness, while certainly is not something anyone would want, gives one lots of opportunity to pray, process, plan, and treasure the simple moments in life. It truly changes one’s perspective. But the truth is, life is terminal and we all have the opportunity to do that. 

When I first became ill, a good year and a half before I was diagnosed, I knew something was terribly wrong. To the point I thought I was dying. The most conflicting part for me, was how much peace I had in my spirit, and yet great turmoil in my flesh. It was a dichotomy of great proportions. Though I had such great peace, I also grieved very deeply. I grieved the thought of leaving behind my family, my loved ones, my friends. It felt like it was more than my heart could bear. The beauty of God’s Creation on this earth, even in its fallen state, is such a sight to behold. The thought of God’s sweet blessings and the joy this life has to offer are so abundant. My flesh couldn’t bear the thought of letting all that go. And yet, I didn’t want to grasp hold of something so tight, that I couldn’t grab hold of Jesus. My Comforter. My Rock. My Redeemer. My Savior. As I walked through this season, God began transforming my flesh to align my spirit with His Spirit. And with it, came His sweet peace! I wish I could say I walked in His peace everyday. I didn’t. There were some days that were harder than others. But He was always with me, carrying me, loving me. 

It always made me feel uncomfortable when folks would talk about my strong faith or that I was an encouragement because I always knew it wasn’t me. It was only by the grace of God. He gives the gift of faith. He gives strength and peace and joy in the midst of trials and suffering. That is not something that’s natural to my flesh. My nature is to worry. But over these past years God has been changing that. He has been changing me. As scripture says, “we are transformed from glory to glory.” I think standing at the precipice of heaven, knowing it’s just a whisper away, changes your perspective. Things that once seemed monumental, become inconsequential. Things once taken for granted become embraced, treasured, and cherished.  

To my dear, dear family...
Nowell, Ginny, Laura Ann & Michael, John Andrew & Liz, Ellie, Jack, Gamble, Avery Grace, Porter, Walker, and Francie…
I love you more than words could ever express the great depth of that love. The great joy you’ve brought my heart. Oh how I have delighted in each of you!

Remember the sweet times with great joy. Laugh hard. Laugh often. Laugh when you remember me. At how I’d drive you all crazy taking so many pictures, but secretly you always loved having them to look at. Laugh at my clumsy ways and overly dramatic slow-motion falls. Oh there were so many epic ones. Laugh at my over-the-top germaphobia, following everyone around with hand sanitizer. Even though you know I was right…well maybe some of the time. Laugh at how I’d always offer advice, but try to be sneaky by saying, “Can I just make a suggestion?” When you always knew the unsolicited advice was coming no matter what. Laugh at how corny I was and how I’d laugh hysterically at my own jokes. Even though there were the occasional eye rolls and head-shakes, I know you all really got a big kick out of that. Laugh at how I’d tease you, when you‘d laughed at me, and I’d say my lot in life was to entertain my family. 

But most of all, just laugh. Remember the good times with great joy. Remember the hard times with great thanksgiving at ALL God has done. Despite the heartache, trials and tribulations in life, rejoice that there is such beauty and joy to behold this side of heaven and even more grandeur once we're actually there! 

I look at my life and wonder why? Why did God choose to bless me with such outrageous abundance? A wonderful husband who loved and cared for me. Who truly lived out our marriage covenant “in sickness and in health.” If I had to do it all over again, I’d choose you, every single time. There’s no one I’d rather sojourn with on this fun, wild, crazy, hard, beautiful journey of life with than with you Beebs! A lifetime with you, my Love, would never be enough, and yet we’ll have all eternity together. Oh how much I deeply love you!

The blessing of my beautiful children (by birth and by marriage), and precious grandchildren. You taught me so much about my heavenly Father’s love, in the depth of my love for each of you. And yet it’s not even the smallest measure of His great love for you. Such great joy and delight you’ve brought my heart! I couldn’t be more proud of who you are and who you are growing to be. You’ve been the joy of my life and I couldn’t love you more! 

The blessing of a childhood and adulthood with devoted and loving parents, with my loving and caring brother and sister, Miller and Cynthia. You’ve always been there for me. I love you always and forever and always cherished all the wonderful memories we shared! For my dear in-laws and extended family members who’ve brought me such joy over the years, I love you dearly.

For the blessing of my sweet chosen family. Friends as close as sisters and brothers. For my faithful prayer warrior sisters...the Watchers on the Wall. For lifelong friends. A church family who has loved us and cared for us, as well as others, with the heart and hands of Jesus. The prayers of so many folks throughout this journey. Some that I’ve never even met. The Body of Believers. For all of you here today. You have blessed my life beyond measure. So many blessings too numerous to count and I love you and give thanks for you.

I cannot say life has been easy. It hasn’t. It isn’t easy for anyone. Though there have been great times on the mountaintops and green pastures, it’s also been filled with many bumps, valleys, and bends in the road. We all can certainly say that about life! 
But God...  
He has been and is so very faithful and so very good every step of the journey! He carries us through. He is indeed a good good Father! 

I’ve thought a lot about legacy and what I’d want that to be. I want my legacy to be Jesus! For those I know and love, to know and love Jesus. That’s what I want. For everyone to be a sold-out, undone, lover of the One who loves us beyond compare. So much so, that He died on the cross for every single one of our sins, so we could live together with Him, throughout all eternity. The greatest sacrifice! The greatest gift! To know Him as LORD. Redeemer. Comforter. Healer. Savior. He is the One whom I love with all that I am. 

Our dear friends have a wonderful family tradition they started from a story by Dr. James Dobson. He had a heart attack many years ago. His family wasn’t sure he would recover, as things did not look good. His children came to the hospital to be with him. He told them to live life to Be There [pointing up to heaven] be THERE, so they all would be together forever with Jesus for all eternity. When he recovered, they decided that whenever they left each other, even just to run to the store, they would be sure and say, “I love you. Be There.” 

That’s what God wants for us all. To be there! If you don’t know Jesus, there is no better time than now. Ask Him to show you that He is real. Ask Him to forgive your sins. Ask Him to be the LORD of Your life. Ask Him to be your Savior and proclaim His Holy name. And if you truly ask and confess with an open heart...He will come to you. He will show you who He truly is, the great depth of His love for you, and He will be your Savior. That is the desire of His heart. He desires you.

For those who know Jesus, but perhaps have strayed away from Him because of the distractions of this life. Call back to Him. And He will answer you. He knows you. He loves you. He longs for you. 

For those of you that know and love Jesus as your LORD and Savior, press in deeper. Hold tighter. Press fully into all He has for you because of His great love for you. 

“I thank God in all my remembrance of you.” Philippians 1:3

I love you all dearly! Be There! 
And for that we proclaim...
SOLI DEO GLORIA 
Glory to God Alone
In Jesus’ precious name Amen and Amen!

Laurie