History

Wednesday, February 22, 2012 12:22 PM CST

"I press on toward the goal to win the prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward." Philippians 3:14

Good morning. I want to start with a HUGE thank you to all who have remembered our family today and many other days with prayers of support and love. We, especially me, appreciate YOU more than you will EVER know!!! It's been 5 years today since Bryce left us and entered heavens gates but it feels like it was just yesterday. I miss him just as much today as I did the day he died. He will always be remembered... He will always be my son... He (like all of our boys') was (and are) a special gift from God. He was God's child first... I was just called to be his special caretaker and mother. And for that, I am truly grateful.

The emotions I have today are very normal, I believe. I was very emotional at the beginning of the month. Then, I turned to not allowing myself to think too hard about the painful memories and loneliness for my son. And, now... I simply want to hold off the pain by showing my gratitude toward God, and you, for carrying us through our first 5 years of Bryce's absence on this earth. Like I said, I miss my son today just as much as I missed him on the day he arrived in heaven. The difference today is that I am even more grateful to God for my time with Bryce, and Tim. I am more grateful today for the time I have with my 4 boys and my husband, Ross, here and now. I am more grateful today for the memories with my entire family. I am more grateful today for my tremendous spiritual growth. I am more aware of how precious life is and how we should savor every moment that we have together. I am more aware of God's presence, His timing and His plan in each and every one of our lives. In fact, one of my favorite things in life is seeing God's plan at-work more obvious than ever! I use to call them signs and sometimes I still do. But really, to me it's God showing us that He is ALWAYS there with us, no matter what.

Thinking back to Bryce and the person he was... I remember a boy full of life, love and compassion for others. It was never about him. It was about continuing the journey everyday with tremendous trust in the Lord. He looked to God for guidance and wanted to continue to learn about Him. He knew and believed God had a plan and purpose for his life and everyone elses. I truly wonder to this day if God told Bryce toward the end of his life about his purpose on this earth. I wish I could know the conversations they had...because I know they had them. There were so many moments that I knew Bryce was talking with God, and Jesus, through his suffering.

This morning, on one of the Bible programs I listen to, I had a thought... When Judas gave Jesus the kiss on his cheek to reveal to the priests and guards just who Jesus was, Jesus still said "I forgive you. This is God's will." What a powerful statement for all of us! How many of us DO actually pray for God's will and yet live in fear? What I've learned... Fear and faith do NOT coincide together... Did Bryce know in the end that this was God's will? He never showed fear... He only showed his child-like faith... Am I grateful for that, too?? YES, I AM! Bryce calmed my fears and helped me find PEACE in the storm through JESUS...

What I have found in todays world is that we try so hard to control everything in life all the while we are being attacked by the enemy. When really....it's simple. If we follow God's commands... If we listen to His guidance... If we trust in Him... If we love and forgive others as God loves and forgives us and yet confronting the enemy... We can make a difference! Can you imagine what a difference we would make in this world if we just followed through with His guidance and trusted God's plan???

I started the New Testament in the Bible last week, and I am thrilled about reading about Jesus and all he did during his short 33 years on this earth. His work was spoken of in the Old Testament and became real in the New. What more proof do we need?

My son and first husband are in heaven. My goal is heaven in God's timing. I too am a sinner. I praise God for His grace and mercy and the sacrifice of his chosen Son's life for the forgiveness of my/our daily sins. I choose to receive and accept His forgiveness over my life. And, I live for the promise of New Life in heaven.

My memories of my son, Bryce Andrew, will always will always be treasured in my heart and mind. I've learned that there are more important things in life than to hold onto the pain and make myself hurt so much. There are many people out there in this world who have it so much worse... Like I've said before, I choose to live life now...today...with gratitude to God for His many blessings. I cannot change what has happened in my past losses but I CAN glorify God through it all! I can share my faith openly and HOPE to help bring others closer to Christ. I pray that my faith will ignite the fire in another persons soul so that they may share the word of God and that it could spread like wildfire! Once again, I truly appreciate those who continue to love us through the ups and downs in life. You are all servants... I pray that me and my family are "paying it forward" to others, just as you have done for us. My advice for the day:

Live for Christ! Live for today! Love others! And, give God all the GLORY!!
PS: Watch "Courageous" the movie!!! Our world needs that message spread throughout the world!

"So we don't look at the troubles we can see right now; rather we look forward to what we have not yet seen. For the troubles we see will soon be over, but the joys to come last forever". 2 Corinthians 4:18

"May the God of HOPE fill you with all joy and peace as you TRUST in Him, so that you may overflow with HOPE by the power of the Holy Spirit." Romans 15:13

"You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in You. TRUST in the Lord forever, for the Lord is the Rock eternal." Isaiah 26:3-4

"May the God who gives endurance and encouragement give you a spirit of unity among yourselves as you follow Christ Jesus, so that with one heart and mouth you may glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God." Romans 15:5-7

"For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." Ephesians 2:10

"I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength." Philippians 4:11-13

Keep the prayers coming for all of our friends who are fighting their battles. Pray for strength, peace, healing and trust in the Lord...
www.caringbridge.org/visit/chrisr
www.caringbridge.org/visit/chadlexvold
www.caringbridge.org/visit/kamiecarlson
www.caringbridge.org/visit/lucasjessamundson
www.caringbridge.org/visit/wendyturnidge
www.caringbridge.org/visit/amberbenike
www.caringbridge.org/visit/melanie
www.caringbridge.org/mn/willcanan
www.caringbridge.org/visit/emeryfamily
www.caringbridge.org/mn/joellesyverson
As always, THANK YOU FOR THE PRAYERS!!! Keep 'em coming!!!

Please continue the prayers for our families who are hurting from the heartbreaking loss of their loved one's:
www.caringbridge.org/visit/nancyhinrichs
www.caringbridge.org/visit/tylerharlicker
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jacksonschneider
www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaachall
www.caringbridge.org/visit/lisaholter
www.caringbridge.org/visit/amytaylor
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jamieoreilly
www.caringbridge.org/visit/gailmenefee
www.caringbridge.org/visit/emmafogarty

Serenity Prayer:
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

~We will ALWAYS love and adore you, Tim & Bryce~

"I pray that Chist will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in Him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love really is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now glory be to God! By His mighty power at work within us, He is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope." Ephesians 3:17-20

With Huge Continuous Faith~

Susie, Mitchell, Logan, Joel & Ethan Breuer

Monday, November 7, 2011 12:28 PM CST

"I press on toward the goal to win the prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward." Philippians 3:14

"So we don't look at the troubles we can see right now; rather we look forward to what we have not yet seen. For the troubles we see will soon be over, but the joys to come last forever". 2 Corinthians 4:18

"May the God of HOPE fill you with all joy and peace as you TRUST in Him, so that you may overflow with HOPE by the power of the Holy Spirit." Romans 15:13

What a beautiful fall day we have here in MN! I am counting my blessings everyday and praying that I live for today, every day. It's so easy to get caught up in the busyness of life and fears of tomorrow. (I do it way more than I wish I would allow!) The "what if's" and the pettiness and small stuff that are big stressors to us everyday but really, in the scheme of life, are so small... Life is precious and brief here on earth. I continue to live for the Lord praying everyday that I am sharing His word and His comfort with someone who needs it...someone He placed in my path for a reason for them--him or her--or for me. I am truly grateful for the MANY, MANY blessings in my life...my family, friends, and so many others.

It is with GREAT JOY that I share that I am newly married to Ross. We had the most beautiful fall wedding day on October 8th! God's presence was embraced and so obvious... Ross and I also--as Ross mentioned that morning--give a some credit to Tim and Bryce for putting in their "requests" also...if that is possible for our guardian angels to do... As I sit here with great joy and gratitude in my heart for this new journey, I still have tears as we all miss Tim and Bryce just as much today as the first day they arrived at heavens gates. Life has its challenges, to me it's a matter of how you choose to handle your challenges. It's about your attitude, your gratitude, and your choice of direction--God's healing power or falling into the pit. I must be honest, I've fallen in many different directions with this roller coaster ride of life. But, God ALWAYS takes my hand and redirects me to Him. I CHOOSE HIM... There is NO OTHER way, in my opinion... I praise Him in my pain and in my joy. I would have nothing without Him. As I type, I ask you to take the time for Him daily. Your time with Him can be by little prayers, daily devotions or just acknowledging His presence in the little daily blessings He pours upon you. Get to know Him, to trust Him, to love Him. Embrace His abundant, unconditional love for you. Embrace His forgiveness found only on the cross through the blood of Jesus Christ. Trust me, none of us are perfect. I am far from perfect but what I consider important is that we/I ask for forgiveness, accept it, embrace it, because we/I are/am not guarenteed tomorrow. What am I doing today to hear "Well done, good and faithful servant"??? I can tell you that there are many days that I feel unsettled in my journey because I want to do sooooo much for Him who has given me strength, peace and healing. We must be watching out for the enemy's attacks upon us. It's challengin to try to be aware daily of the earthly temptations of negativity and other stuff. I wish I could catch on to the things I shouldn't fall for before I fall for them... We are human... Anyway, there's lots of stuff going on in the world and it's not easy but it is easy to choose God...to me anyway. Not saying I did that easily in the beginning of my faith journey. But, I'm so glad that I've figured that out. Now to stick with it!

On to our boys... Mitch has his 17th birthdday on the 19th. Wow... He's getting ready and excited to start wrestling season. I am pumped! I can't wait! I love it! Tim would have been pumped too. Ross is so great with the boys. He loves them, and they love him... God is so good. I think He has been "preparing" Ross for a long time. I am eternally grateful for that. Ross is great with wrestling, too. Again, I am grateful... Logan just turned 15 last week and passed his driver's permit test, of couse he had to take it on the day of his birthday... He has his mother's persistence. ;-) He is also getting prepared for wrestling season. Did I say I love it yet?? Both he and Mitch had a great football season. Joel just got glasses so he is loving that he can "see" again! Sixth grade is going great for him. He is everybody's friend, like Bryce was. Joel got to go hunting with one of Ross' friends yesterday and loved every minute of it! He almost got a shot at a 4-point buck but the gun jammed. He's ready to go again, this he gets from his father! Ethan turned 8 on Oct 24th. He is still as funny as ever. He said to me the night before his birthday as I was tucking him into bed, "I sure am gonna miss being 7..." He's my most dramatic child. He's also so loving, like Bryce. I thank God for my boys every single day...

Ross and I are a great parenting team, in my opinion! ;-) We strive to be shining examples of sharing and growing together in our relationship. He is firm, loving and playful with the boys. He has been such a blessing in our lives... I thank God for him everyday. I have learned that we must love our loved one's while they are here with us. In my opinion, we must LOVE WITH NO REGRETS. We need to take the time for each other, love each other unconditionally like Christ loves the church, respect each other, grow together and choose God to be the center of our lives. I've learned way to quickly how precious life is... I will always love Tim and Bryce,...ALWAYS!! They have brought me so much joy, so much love, and so many incredible life lessons. They are my heavenly hero's. I treasure every single memory ever made with them...and there are a lot!! I thank God for them everyday...

Since my last update in July, my dear friend Nancy Hinrichs passed away from her battle with cancer on August 31st. I was fortunate to be with her on her last day here on earth. I miss her dearly... She was an amazing woman... And, what a legacy she has left behind. I simply adore her daughter, Haley, who is in Logan's grade. She too is amazing along with her very wise dad and great brother. I feel so blessed to be a part of Nancy's life. Today though my heart is saddened once again as we learned of another one of Logan's classmates losing a parent, his dad. Please keep Jacob and his mom, Kim, in your prayers. We feel all of their pain and loneliness. Life is tough, to say the least, at times. Again, it's the direction we choose to take that will lead us Home someday... Please keep all of these people in your prayers. My heart aches for them... Thank you. Thank you for everything you have done for us!! Thank you from the bottom of a very grateful heart...

"You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in You. TRUST in the Lord forever, for the Lord is the Rock eternal." Isaiah 26:3-4

"May the God who gives endurance and encouragement give you a spirit of unity among yourselves as you follow Christ Jesus, so that with one heart and mouth you may glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God." Romans 15:5-7

"For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." Ephesians 2:10

"I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength." Philippians 4:11-13

Keep the prayers coming for all of our friends who are fighting their battles. Pray for strength, peace, healing and trust in the Lord...
www.caringbridge.org/visit/chrisr
www.caringbridge.org/visit/chadlexvold
www.caringbridge.org/visit/kamiecarlson
www.caringbridge.org/visit/lucasjessamundson
www.caringbridge.org/visit/wendyturnidge
www.caringbridge.org/visit/amberbenike
www.caringbridge.org/visit/melanie
www.caringbridge.org/mn/willcanan
www.caringbridge.org/visit/emeryfamily
www.caringbridge.org/mn/joellesyverson
As always, THANK YOU FOR THE PRAYERS!!! Keep 'em coming!!!

Please continue the prayers for our families who are hurting from the heartbreaking loss of their loved one's:
www.caringbridge.org/visit/nancyhinrichs
www.caringbridge.org/visit/tylerharlicker
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jacksonschneider
www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaachall
www.caringbridge.org/visit/lisaholter
www.caringbridge.org/visit/amytaylor
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jamieoreilly
www.caringbridge.org/visit/gailmenefee
www.caringbridge.org/visit/emmafogarty

Serenity Prayer:
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

~We will ALWAYS love and adore you, Tim & Bryce~

"I pray that Chist will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in Him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love really is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now glory be to God! By His mighty power at work within us, He is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope." Ephesians 3:17-20

With Huge Continuous Faith~

Susie, Mitchell, Logan, Joel & Ethan Breuer

Tuesday, July 19, 2011 5:36 AM CDT

"I press on toward the goal to win the prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward." Philippians 3:14

"So we don't look at the troubles we can see right now; rather we look forward to what we have not yet seen. For the troubles we see will soon be over, but the joys to come last forever". 2 Corinthians 4:18

"May the God of HOPE fill you with all joy and peace as you TRUST in Him, so that you may overflow with HOPE by the power of the Holy Spirit." Romans 15:13

Good morning,

It�s actually Monday noon but I wanted to be ahead of the game in the �CB update world�. Once again, it�s an emotional time. It�s still so hard to believe that it�s been 3 years since Tim made his arrival in heaven� Every memory, and I mean EVERY, is as fresh as the day of, and the week of, his death. I have so much to say in my mind but with that I also want to make sure that I am careful to speak the true faith-filled words that God wants me to speak. Not words of pity or sadness, not words of death and dying but words of thankfulness for the time and memories that we had with Tim�and, as always, Bryce too.
The memories of Tim and his one-liners or his blunt replies always brings a smile to my face and a moment of laughter to my heart. His rough-gruff touch and his gentle, loving and consoling hands or hug to make sure we knew he was there to love and protect us always. Tim Breuer did exactly what God called him to do �according to His purpose�. He was a loving, kind, compassionate, and funny man� He truly was one-of-a-kind. His family�s needs came first, no matter what. His hard work ethic has been remembered by many. He never complained, he just did what needed to be done. He was honest and loyal. He was a man of integrity and faith. He was a leader. He was also the first to admit if he made a mistake�that one took time, though�just like the rest of us! When he had a weakness, he chose to work on it to improve at it. He was a true shining example to his sons of how to be a man of God. And, for that, I am grateful.

Today on one of my radio programs that I like to listen to (Back to the Bible on KFSI 92.9 FM out of Rochester�another fabulous Christian radio station like KTIS 98.5 out of the cities ), I heard that Jesus prayed to God 3 times asking God to �take this cup from him if it was His will�...3 times! That blew me away but not until tonight when I REALLY thought about it on my way home from my meeting. (Nope, I didn�t finish my Monday noon update) Anyway, it hit me that of all the times that I�ve questioned God or asked Him to change His will in my life, and that Jesus had done the same thing�Jesus�3 times! If God�s only son�who KNEW the reason God sent him to this earth for a plan and a purpose to glorify Him and save all of us�again, if Jesus asked God to change His mind, it�s ok that I have asked Him to do that for me also�like Bryce dying�and Tim dying. God has forgiven and still loved me for doing that. But here�s the clincher� I heard them say that God had to literally �turn His back� from Jesus because He (too) felt the pain of watching His son suffer but KNEW what was BEST for this world, and that would be to die on the cross to save all of us from our sins and to give us the promise of eternal life in heaven� He knew that if Jesus persuaded Him to change His mind and His plan, we may not have been saved today� At least that is how I have looked and learned from this lesson on patience. Wow� That truly BLOWS ME AWAY!!! I am so grateful that God didn�t change His mind. I am so grateful that God felt the pain and that Jesus took/received the pain for all of us. I too am thankful for the pain I have felt because I would never be where I am today in my faith journey had I not felt the pain and suffering of losing my son and husband. Our God is so great and so good. I also have learned how important and critical it is to be patient and wait for God in our lives. We have to learn patience� When we become patient, not just the word, but really patient and wait on God�s plan in our lives�He fulfills His plan and purpose�the reason why He created us�to glorify Him in HIS TIMING. Not our timing. While we wait for Him and beg and plead, like I did�He is still working. We NEED to remember that! He is working before we ask. He is working while we ask. He is working long after He has answered�in His timing! He never rests. He is the one constant in our lives. My advice today is that we all try to be patient and wait upon the Lord, and then I would say to live with expectation because He always answers prayers. Maybe not how we want them answered but again, He knows best�

I feel blessed to be here tonight. As you can hear/read, I am emotional, just as always on these memorable dates. I was anxious to share what I�ve learned from God�s word. I feel blessed to feel the love and passion for Christ and to be so grateful for what he has done and sacrificed for all of us. I was able to share our story, my faith journey, in the Today magazine here in Goodhue County. I feel blessed to be able to do that because I pray that people will turn to the Lord, submit to His will, wait patiently and trust, ask for forgiveness and accept it, and love others. Someone said, �Maybe you�ll get a lot of calls.� Truly,�I hope God gets a lot of �calls�� I�ve also spoken of my faith journey at 3 separate times; 2 were to youth groups and one to a women�s ministry. I am happy to share hoping that it will inspire someone on their own faith journey. From these special moments, I have felt inspired by others. Thank you for always showing love and kindness to our family. We are truly grateful� Tim would be so grateful too, and Bryce. Love to all. **Also adding to our prayer list is Chris Rodgers from Red Wing. www.caringbridge.org/visit/chrisr. He is an awesome dad and husband who has led by example and has such a zest for life! He too goes through the cancer roller coaster ride with such dignity. His wife is an angel on earth and his 3 kids are adorable! What a great man and family! Thank you...

I want to share some of my favorite songs that give me HOPE and healing and also lots of praise to God. I hope you will google them and listen. They are all awesome! These people are so talented! God has blessed their efforts!:

(Worship) Goodbye Ordinary by Mercy Me�Chorus: �Live like there�s no tomorrow, Love extravagantly, Lead a life to be followed, Goodbye ordinary, Goodbye ordinary�. LOVE IT!!!

(Praise) Alright by Mercy Me�It makes me want to dance!

(Praise) Time Has Come�Mercy Me�Chorus: �Time has come, To raise our hearts as one, And glorify the God of everything, We live our lives, For the renown of Christ, Oh we are children of the sovereign King�. Awesome, awesome song!!! Makes me cry every time!

(Thankfulness) Blessings by Laura Story�I tried to copy and paste but couldn�t get it to work. You MUST google these lyrics and the music! It is a truly powerful song of life�s struggles and God getting us through� Laura Story wrote it through her own personal life struggles as her husband waited for answers from God.

"You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in You. TRUST in the Lord forever, for the Lord is the Rock eternal." Isaiah 26:3-4

"May the God who gives endurance and encouragement give you a spirit of unity among yourselves as you follow Christ Jesus, so that with one heart and mouth you may glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God." Romans 15:5-7

"For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." Ephesians 2:10

"I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength." Philippians 4:11-13

Keep the prayers coming for all of our friends who are fighting their battles. Pray for strength, peace, healing and trust in the Lord...
www.caringbridge.org/visit/chrisr
www.caringbridge.org/visit/nancyhinrichs
www.caringbridge.org/visit/chadlexvold
www.caringbridge.org/visit/kamiecarlson
www.caringbridge.org/visit/lucasjessamundson
www.caringbridge.org/visit/wendyturnidge
www.caringbridge.org/visit/amberbenike
www.caringbridge.org/visit/melanie
www.caringbridge.org/mn/willcanan
www.caringbridge.org/visit/wendyturnidge
www.caringbridge.org/visit/chrisr
www.caringbridge.org/visit/emeryfamily
www.caringbridge.org/mn/joellesyverson
As always, THANK YOU FOR THE PRAYERS!!! Keep 'em coming!!!

Please continue the prayers for our families who are hurting from the heartbreaking loss of their loved one's:
www.caringbridge.org/visit/tylerharlicker
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jacksonschneider
www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaachall
www.caringbridge.org/visit/lisaholter
www.caringbridge.org/visit/amytaylor
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jamieoreilly
www.caringbridge.org/visit/gailmenefee
www.caringbridge.org/visit/emmafogarty

Serenity Prayer:
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

~We will ALWAYS love and adore you, Tim & Bryce~

"I pray that Chist will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in Him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love really is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now glory be to God! By His mighty power at work within us, He is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope." Ephesians 3:17-20

With Huge Continuous Faith~

Susie, Mitchell, Logan, Joel & Ethan Breuer

Wednesday, May 18, 2011 9:49 AM CDT

Thursday, April 7, 2011 7:33 PM CDT

Tuesday, February 22, 2011 8:20 AM CST

Tuesday, February 8, 2011 11:18 AM CST

Saturday, November 27, 2010 10:57 PM CST

Tuesday, August 10, 2010 3:01 PM CDT

Sunday, June 20, 2010 3:39 PM CDT

Tuesday, May 18, 2010 9:51 PM CDT

"I press on toward the goal to win the prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward." Philippians 3:14

"So we don't look at the troubles we can see right now; rather we look forward to what we have not yet seen. For the troubles we see will soon be over, but the joys to come last forever". 2 Corinthians 4:18

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY BRYCIE BOY!!! I wanted to thank everyone for the messages of love for my Brycer and our family! You are all so great! It has been a good day. I gave blood with Lana this morning. I went to school and delivered Bryce's classmates birthday cupcakes for the last time. I always said I'd do this through 6th grade...wow...can't believe that they are already in 6th grade!!! They loved it, I loved it, it was soooo great! I love that class!!! Had lunch with friends, visited, laughed and sat out in the warm weather. Then, watched Logan's baseball game which got really exciting and then went to his baseball pizza party. Joel, Ethan and I let our balloons up to Bryce while Logan stayed at his party. After picking Mitchell up from wrestling practice, he and Logan let their balloons off to Bryce. It's been a really good day... God is good... I knew you'd want to know. I'm super tired and need to get some sleep so thanks again to everyone. Enjoy the great MN weather, for those of you here... Hugs & Love to EVERYONE!!!

Sunday, May 9, 2010 11:28 AM CDT

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY to all of the wonderful Mom's in the world!!! We have been blessed waaaaay more than we ever imagined motherhood to be! Wouldn't you agree?! It's definitely not an easy job BUT it is the BEST "job" that God EVER created!!!...in my opinion anyway. Thank you, God, for choosing me to be the mother of these 5 incredible boys... As Martina McBride sings, "I Have Been Blessed". Sooooo blessed... God is good.

I'm so sorry for the delay in updates. I know that many of you are wondering how we are doing in life. I would be wondering the same thing. We are doing very well. Each day in life IS a blessing; easy or crazy, complicated or simple, sad or happy, busy or quiet...each day is a GIFT. I am grateful to be alive, healthy and raising my 4 wonderful boys. I am grateful everyday for the many, many loving and supportive people in our lives. I am grateful for God's unconditional love, strength and guidance in my life. I am grateful that Jesus died for me (for all of us!) and therefore through his gift of salvation and his life, we are forgiven and will receive the promise eternal life in heaven someday...when our time comes. I live with the HOPE of God's promises.

We have had lots of activity on our farm this spring! Grandpa/Dad finished planting the crops early because of the great spring weather. The corn is up and life is obvious at our place! Arnie has not only been busy in the field but he has been busy helping me with lots and lots of plans for our future home. I have had lots of friends and family here helping me pack and sort our lives into rubbermaid containers and boxes. We are building the home that Tim and I planned right here on our farm. The old farm house came down last Wednesday and the basement was dug Thursday. Things are happening fast! I have prayed for God's guidance in the decisions I've been making, and I totally feel His constant presence. I also believe, have seen and trust that God will continuously provide the people for the project....and He has! We hope to be in the house in 5 months. With the help of family and friends, we have moved a trailer home onto the farm, and we are living in there. Again, I am grateful for a roof over our heads and people who love and care, and sweat and strain, for us!!!

I truly believe that Tim would be so pleased with how everything is happening. God is making it all fall into place. I really do feel that my boys and I are trying to continue "living" our lives. Tim & Bryce would not have wanted us to stop living. I even had a dream once after Tim died where he and Bryce told me to "Keep moving on." We did not die when they did, although it felt as if we did many times. We love and miss them dearly. We wish they could be here with us. We remember them and talk about them every single day... But, we have also realized that there is nothing that we can do to change it. They would not want us to be continuously sad or down. They would want us to have joy and life and continue to grow. This doesn't mean that we don't have our sad days... We still have them, just not as often as they were. Some days it still hits so hard. Just yesterday, it was like the veil was lifted from my eyes and I realized once again how much our lives had changed with their deaths. I try really hard to turn my sorrow into gratitude in every situation. God always picks me up and carries me at those times. Thank goodness for that because I can't do this on my own. My dependence is on the Lord. My trust and belief is in Him. He always provides for us...ALWAYS. People ask me if I still have signs from Tim & Bryce. Just today at church, I feel that I did... One song we sang during communion was "Peace Like A River". That was Bryce's processional hymn at his service. Then, I heard in my head that Tim's processional song would be played, too. Of course, I didn't look ahead because 'maybe I was wrong'. So, I waited until the end of the church service. And, sure enough... "Til We Meet Again" was our ending song at church today. That was Tim's processional song at his service. I really feel like that was a sign from both of them saying 'Happy Mother's Day' to me. It's the first time that I didn't cry during either song... That was also a blessing in itself.

Our Hands of Hope non-profit organization in memory of Bryce is holding its 2nd annual Garage Sale to raise money for the children on Friday, May 14 from 3:30-7pm and Saturday, May 15 from 7am-1pm at Holy Trinity Church in Goodhue. We have given money to 16 children and their families so far in our 15 months as a group. Bryce would be sooooo pleased!!! If you have gently used items to donate, you can drop them off this week either Monday or Thursday from 3-6pm at the church. Thank you so very, very much for all of your support to our group! Every little bit or big stuff counts!!! We pray that God continues to bless our efforts.

And finally, as many of you know it is Bryce's birthday on May 18th. He would have been 12 years old. I would like to again challenge and encourage you to give blood that week (May 16-22). Please, please, PLEASE do consider--even if you haven't given blood before--to do so!!! Bryce had 98 transfusions (2 were transplants from his brother, Mitchell) during his illness and treatments--almost 4 years total. There are sooooo many people out there fighting there battles. Please do this to help them! We pray daily for Will, Melanie, Gail and Amber and many other's. These people are so great. Please do this to help them or someone else you know or don't even know. Praise God that we are able to do such a wonderful thing for someone else!!! When you do give at Mayo Hilton Blood Bank, please do it in memory of Bryce. They always seem to keep a tally of all donors in memory of him. It's great to see!

I need to go. I just want to thank all of you, once again for your love, support and continuous prayers for our family and our friends. We love and appreciate you all! Please say an extra prayer today for all those who have lost a mother, daughter, sister or friend on this Mother's Day. Make it a great day!!! God bless you all.

Our Hands of Hope group has been so blessed to be able to bless the children!!! If you know of a child who is facing difficult challenges in their life, please give them our Hands of Hope information or my email. I am going to get a hold of my faithful friend and helper, Serena, to ask her to get the links on here for the cover letter and very simple application. Again, God is soooooo good. Thank you to God first and to all of you for your contributions! And, especially for your prayers. God is blessing our organization�

Keep the prayers coming for all of our friends who are fighting their battles. Pray for strength, peace, healing and trust in the Lord...
www.caringbridge.org/visit/amberbenike
www.caringbridge.org/visit/melanie
www.caringbridge.org/mn/willcanan
www.caringbridge.org/visit/gailmenefee
www.caringbridge.org/visit/wendyturnidge
www.caringbridge.org/visit/chrisr
www.caringbridge.org/visit/emeryfamily
www.caringbridge.org/mn/joellesyverson www.caringbridge.org/visit/emmafogarty
As always, THANK YOU FOR THE PRAYERS!!! Keep 'em coming!!!

Please continue the prayers for our families who are hurting from the heartbreaking loss of their loved one's:
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jacksonschneider
www.caringbridge.org/visit/wendyturnidge
www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaachall
www.caringbridge.org/visit/lisaholter
www.caringbridge.org/visit/amytaylor
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jamieoreilly

Serenity Prayer:
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

~We will ALWAYS love and adore you, Tim & Bryce~

"I pray that Chist will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in Him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love really is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now glory be to God! By His mighty power at work within us, He is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope." Ephesians 3:17-20

With Huge Continuous Faith~

Susie, Mitchell, Logan, Joel & Ethan Breuer

Thursday, February 25, 2010 6:39 PM CST

Thursday, February 11, 2010 6:38 AM CST

Thursday, December 24, 2009 2:25 PM CST

Monday, December 7, 2009 10:16 AM CST

Monday, November 19, 2009 2:29 PM CST

"I press on toward the goal to win the prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward." Philippians 3:14

"So we don't look at the troubles we can see right now; rather we look forward to what we have not yet seen. For the troubles we see will soon be over, but the joys to come last forever". 2 Corinthians 4:18

HAPPY 15th BIRTHDAY, MITCHELL MURLAND WAYNE!!! **Named after Great Grandpa Murphy Buck, Grandpa Arnold Wayne Breuer and Dad, Timothy Wayne** You are a ROCKSTAR! I do not know what I would do without you! God has created you to be a person who is organized, reliable, thoughtful, funny, hard-working and loving. I appreciate you more than you will EVER know... I just know that your dad and brother, and brothers on earth, are so proud of you, too. You have always been a leader in our family. Today I will not put info about the day you were born because I have it in my past (birthday) journal entries. Today, I just want to say THANK YOU for being exactly WHO God created YOU to be... As far as I have seen, you do not try to be someone else. I adore that about you. I admire you more than you will ever imagine. And, I respect you. You are an inspiration to me and many others. I love you, Mitchell!!! I hope your birthday is more than you ever expected.

Mitch has been working in the field with Grandpa as much as possible after school. He loves it! So much like his dad... Tomorrow night, we are going to a hotel in Rochester because of someone who was so giving to our family last year at Christmas. They gave us this hotel stay and 2 other gift certificates. To whoever it was, THANK YOU... My boys are thrilled and excited!!! So many people have given to our family in so many ways; in love, respect, comfort, faith, gifts, time and so much more. This journey that we are on is one I never would have imagined.... I just pray that we can give back to, and have given a little back to, the many who have supported us and also to many strangers--past, present and future. We are grateful for EVERYONE that God has placed in our paths!!!

I just quickly want to share my "Jesus Calling" devotional (Jesus speaking to his readers) from this morning. Sometimes I worry so much about our future, in soooooo many different areas. I must hold onto HOPE and TRUST that God will ALWAYS provide--which I BELIEVE He truly WILL!!!

"Leave outcomes up to me. Follow me wherever I lead, without worrying about how it will all turn out. Think of your life as an adventure, with me as your guide and companion. Live in the now, concentrating on staying in step with me. When our path leads to a cliff, be willing to climb it with my help. When we come to a resting place, take time to be refreshed in my presence. Enjoy the rhythm of life lived close to me.

You already know the ultimate destination of your journey: your entrance into heaven (AMEN!). So keep your focus on the path just before you, leaving outcomes up to me."

I don't know what I could do without my daily devotionals... They clear my thoughts, build my hopes, and keep me focused on God's presence, His plan, and His purpose in my life. He has created each one of us for many special purposes... Look back on your life with an open heart and an open mind to see where, when and how He has worked in your life. Then, lift up His name and praise Him--Release & Receive--for the many blessings in your life including His unconditional love. Turn to Him. Don't look around, look up! We love and appreciate each and every one of you!!! God bless you all. Have a great weekend.

Monday, November 16, 2009 10:24 AM CST
It's one of those days that "something needs to be said". I don't even know what it is today but I'm going to admit that I'm here today for my own "therapy"... In my "Word In Season" (devotional book from church) this morning, it spoke of God's love, and to me, it was reminding me how my journaling here for 6 1/2 years (wow, that's a long time...maybe I should stop!) has been my therapy of God's unconditional love... I feel like it told my complete 6 1/2 year history! Well, I'm just gonna retype it all here:

"But I trusted in your steadfast love; my heart shall rejoice in your salvation." Psalm 13:5

"In six short verses, this psalm teaches us one way to understand prayer. We can cry out to God with all of the pain, loss, and abandonment we are experiencing. Then, we can bargain with God and tell God what will happen to us if God doesn't do something. Finally, in making these complaints and demands to God, we can recall how God has been with us all along. Often, though, that final recognition only comes after we can tell our side of the story. Imagine prayer being God patiently listening to all our ranting and raving and still deciding to stick around. Now THAT is steadfast love.
I am not very good at expressing my anger. I am afraid that if I get mad at someone that person will choose to walk away. So I bottle up my anger. At some point it explodes and then those close to me need to walk away. They do not deserve my anger and so do what they need for their own protection. I trust, though, that God does not walk away. That is the difference between human love and steadfast love.
**Steadfast One, I am amazed at your capacity to love. Help me to trust that you will always hear me. Amen."

Personally, this devotion and prayer really spoke to me. What it said, in the first paragraph especially, is what I've done in my CB journaling. I've ALWAYS felt like it was me and God's conversation and resolve... I cry out to God, then I bargain--oh how many times I have bargained with God...telling Him that He needed to DO something!...when all the while He WAS doing something. And, in the end,...after venting and Him listening..always realizing, and praising Him, that He has been with us the whole, entire time. That pretty much sums up my entire CB journaling experience. I'm sure many of you can relate...

I'm so emotional today for some reason. I do not know what triggered it. I am not here for your pity. I am here for what I just wrote...for God's unconditional, steadfast love, hope and peace. Do not feel sorry for me or my family. We have been blessed beyond imagination... As I walked in the door from exercising this morning, Joel hugged me and said, "Mom, if we didn't have God, we would have nothing! We wouldn't even be here!" My reply was, "Yes, Joel. That's why I thank God everyday for the love we had with Daddy and Bryce for as long as we did. And, that's why I thank God that He has us all here together now, and that He chose me to be your Mom." What is it that they call the scarring of a horses flesh? I think it's "proud flesh". It's like the scars of Jesus in his hands, feet and side. He wears those scars for us. I will wear my scars for him. I am grateful for my scars because I am more devoted to God because of these scars... And some day, I will see those scars that Jesus took for me...and you... Until then, I must continue on because we have no guarentee in tomorrow...that's not to depress you or make you anxious, nervous or panicky. That is to open your eyes and your heart to loving other's unconditionally, like the love of Christ.

Last week in my devotions I had an Aha moment... I try really hard to focus on Jesus and God's Peace and Presence (P & P) in my life. Somedays I am repeating it over and over and over again. And, somedays I find that I haven't thought of it in 10 days! But, in my reading and Aha moment, I learned something new. I am now treasuring it along with my P & P... It is a new R & R. It is Release and Receive... Release all your cares, worries, burdens, anxieties, battles, stressors, and negative thoughts to Him. And, Receive His many blessings, His forgiveness, His peace, His joy, and His unconditional love... I pray that you too will grasp this (new to me) concept.

My boys and I had the pleasure to go up north this weekend with my family. My brother, Chris and his kids, were here from Hawaii. My brother, Geoff, flew in from Houston on Friday night. They all flew home this morning. Chris and Geoff are 2 of my closest friends for life--Geoff is 18 mos. younger than me and Chris is 18 mos. younger than Geoff. Last night, Geoff and I were talking. He told me that he learned so much from Bryce... He complains so much less and appreciates life so much more. He remembers how Bryce had such terrible Graft vs. Host Disease (much of it to his skin) and never complained. He remembers what an incredible kid and trooper he was with everything he went through in his battle. Bryce has impacted Geoff's life forever... He thinks about Bryce's life and purpose as a 'messenger'. We got to talking about when people can be "high maintenance"--very concerned about themselves in life. And, it hit me. God wants us to be high maintenance to Him. He wants us to come to Him with EVERYTHING so that we depend ONLY on HIM!!! It only makes sense to me. I will R & R with God by my side, steadfast and faithful. He will bring me Peace in His Presence. I will survive through His unconditional love and grace...thank goodness for His grace!!!

It is Mitchell's 15th birthday on Thursday... Once again, I can't help but wish his dad would be here with him to celebrate... Life is so different than I had ever "planned" it... I just keep asking God to call on me to do His work and forgive me because I am soooooo totally human... May the love of God pierce your soul today... All our love and appreciation to you. God bless.

Our Hands of Hope group has been so blessed to be able to bless the children!!! If you know of a child who is facing difficult challenges in their life, please give them our Hands of Hope information or my email. I am going to get a hold of my faithful friend and helper, Serena, to ask her to get the links on here for the cover letter and very simple application. Again, God is soooooo good. Thank you to God first and to all of you for your contributions! And, especially for your prayers. God is blessing our organization�

Keep the prayers coming for all of our friends who are fighting their battles. Pray for strength, peace, healing and trust in the Lord...
www.caringbridge.org/visit/amberbenike
www.caringbridge.org/visit/melanie
www.caringbridge.org/mn/willcanan
www.caringbridge.org/visit/gailmenefee
www.caringbridge.org/visit/wendyturnidge
www.caringbridge.org/visit/chrisr
www.caringbridge.org/visit/emeryfamily
www.caringbridge.org/mn/joellesyverson www.caringbridge.org/visit/emmafogarty
As always, THANK YOU FOR THE PRAYERS!!! Keep 'em coming!!!

Please continue the prayers for our families who are hurting from the heartbreaking loss of their loved one's:
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jacksonschneider
www.caringbridge.org/visit/wendyturnidge
www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaachall
www.caringbridge.org/visit/lisaholter
www.caringbridge.org/visit/amytaylor
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jamieoreilly

Serenity Prayer:
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

~We will ALWAYS love and adore you, Tim & Bryce~

"I pray that Chist will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in Him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love really is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now glory be to God! By His mighty power at work within us, He is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope." Ephesians 3:17-20

With Huge Continuous Faith~

Susie, Mitchell, Logan, Joel & Ethan Breuer

Tuesday, November 3, 2009 8:45 AM CST

Saturday, October 24, 2009 12:16 AM CDT

"I press on toward the goal to win the prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward." Philippians 3:14

"So we don't look at the troubles we can see right now; rather we look forward to what we have not yet seen. For the troubles we see will soon be over, but the joys to come last forever". 2 Corinthians 4:18

Happy 6th Birthday, Ethan Alexander!!! I am amazed that it has been 6 years�but then again, I�m not surprised at all. I can remember that morning, and that day, like it was yesterday� **That�s just crazy because my memory is not the best anymore.** I remember your dad and I talking about the names we chose for you on the way in to the hospital� We had decided, if you were a boy, he would name you. And, if you were a girl, I would name you. So, it was either Ethan Alexander or Maicey LeeAnn Breuer. I remember the doctor saying, �It�s a boy!� And then, �Where�s all the hair?� That comment was made by her because all of our babies had hair, and you had very little hair! Then, I remember your first bath with Megan. And later in the day, one of the best moments of all�when your big brothers came in to meet the newest addition in our family after school was out. They decided that they didn�t want to know if you were a boy or a girl until they got to the hospital. They were going to find out by the color of your hat� So, in walk the brothers��oldest to youngest, of course. As they are walking in, Mitchell says, �Is that a blue hat, Mom?� Logan says, �Is it a boy?� I say, �Yes.� Logan says, �Yes!� And Bryce says, �Awww!� with much disappointment in his voice. I remember he was not wanting to hold you because he had wanted a little sister soooooo bad!!! Then, I told him to come over and look at you, so he finally did. I took your hat off and said, �Look Bryce, we think Ethan looks like you.� Suddenly a huge, million-dollar smile arose upon his little freckled face�and he said, �Can I hold him?� From that point on, he didn�t want to let go of you� It was always so beautiful. All of your brothers loved you so much but for some reason, Bryce always wanted to hold you and feed you and burp you and talk to you and make you laugh��. We have so many pictures of him holding you, and you love them all now! It is truly amazing to see the incredible resemblance between you and Bryce with your Kindergarten pictures!!! I wish everyone could see them!!! And, you absolutely LOVE the fact that you look sooooooo much like Bryce! Funny how the table has turned�when you were born, BRYCE was so happy that you looked like him and now YOU are so happy that you look like him�wow� I also remember all the hair loss that Bryce was having while I was in the hospital from the Delayed Intensification Phase of chemo treatments. His hair was all over us. When we got home, we shaved all the brothers but you, of course! You already looked shaved practically�haha.

So, my little man�the Birthday Boy is sick today.. I�m bummed for him. He had a temp, cough and throat pain. I�m assuming we will be rescheduling his b-day party for tomorrow. He said, �So, Mom� That means I will NEVER have a b-day party?!� I said, �No, we are just going to reschedule it.� He said, �What does reschedule mean???� He�s so funny. He is so many things wrapped up in one. God has blessed me so very much with my boys. I am so grateful for my life! That doesn�t mean I don�t get sad still. In fact, I had been doing pretty well, and then since Wednesday night, I have been so lonely and sad� I�m better today. My boys keep on keeping on� They are such gifts from God. I�ve been really trying to juggle, balance, and focus on the tasks at hand these days. God 1st, family 2nd, house and MK 3rd. The house shows that it is in 3rd place�ugh. My boys have a lot of responsibilities and know that they are greatly appreciated by their mom. I still wish my life wasn�t totally changed from what I had ever planned�but there is absolutely NOTHING that I can do about it other than **MAKE THE DECISION TO MAKE THE MOST OF LIFE!!!** for me and for my boys but mostly for God�. I so badly want to answer His call. I want to be who He created me to be with a plan and a purpose in life to glorify Him. So, I�m trying my best to keep my focus.

This week has been extremely busy but soooo good. I finally did crash yesterday. I didn�t want to get out of bed�obviously with hitting the snooze from 5-6am! Didn�t want to exercise�so I cut it short. Didn�t want to get out of the shower�it was sooo cold in the house. It�s hard to find motivation some days but I think that that happens to many of us. Monday was Mitchell�s last football game which they won! I think he is getting his mind-set ready for wrestling, now. Logan�s last football game was Thursday and cold! He was very happy with how much they had improved during the season. I hope he is mentally preparing for wrestling. I wish so badly that their Dad could be here to get them fired up�to teach them�to give them more confidence� I do my best to be their Dad figure too but no matter what, it�s not the same. They are survivors, and they will conquer life by the grace of God! I believe that! Joel and Ethan are doing well in school. Joel loved flag football on Saturdays. Ethan is thinking we need to get the wrestling mat rolled out in the garage so the brothers can teach him now that he is in kindergarten! Mitch isn�t ready for the hassle of keeping the mat cleaned and moving the pickup out. We�ll wait a bit. I am most definitely getting anxious for wrestling season! I LOVE it! Even though I didn�t grow up with wrestling, Tim got me into it, and it is such a fun sport!!!

Our Hands of Hope 5K/1 Mile Fun Run/Walk with Hog Roast and Concert was amazing beyond words!!! I cannot even begin to explain how things �just fell into place� and happened so perfectly� Well, actually I can. God�s hands were ALL OVER IT!!! Everything that day, and leading up to that day, went so smoothly!!! The committee members (9) are such a blessing to me, and this organization, and so much the hammer, glue and nails to the foundation! These women are amazing individuals who give their VERY BEST to make sure that the children are taken care of and that Bryce�s legacy of compassion lives on always! I am honored to be working with each and every one of these special women who are all mom�s to Bryce�s classmates. So very cool� And to the people who donated time, gifts, talents, money�Wow� God is soooooooooo good� I cannot put into words how everyone has shown so much compassion and talent again for the children� SPEECHLESS. That is how I feel with many, many tears in my eyes� Bryce would be sooooo pleased. I know that God is�He is making all of this happen. Now, from you� If you know of a child who is facing difficult challenges in their life, please give them our Hands of Hope information. I am going to get a hold of my faithful friend and helper, Serena, to ask her to get the links on here for the cover letter and very simple application. We are collecting applications until October 31st for this round of monetary distribution. I am so very pleased and honored to say that with our Hands of Hope 5K, we raised approximately $6,000.� Again, God is soooooo good. Thank you to God first and to all of you for your contributions! And, especially for your prayers. God is blessing our organization�

More prayers are needed for friends who are fighting their battles� Amber Benike is a wonderful wife and mother of two beautiful daughters. She was diagnosed with a rare type of bone cancer and is going through her chemo treatments. She is fighting her major life battle and has much to endure, yet. I know that she would greatly appreciate your prayers! She is 25 years old and wise beyond those years, already. I had the pleasure to visit with her this week at the hospital and she is truly an amazing individual. Pray for her family, her faith, and her healing. Her CB site is www.caringbridge.org/visit/amberbenike. And, then our little friend, Melanie, is battling the H1N1 virus this past week at the hospital. Bless her precious little heart�she doesn�t have the healthy conditions in her body to fight it off like you and I can. Please kick the prayers up a notch for her. She is the strongest little girl that I�ve ever met!!! She is a true example of patience, courage, and faith�much like her mother, Amber. Her CB site is www.caringbridge.org/visit/melanie. Thank you for praying for both of our friends.

This week, Tuesday evening, I also had the honor and privilege to speak at a Women�s Ministry meeting at a church in Red Wing. This also has left me speechless other than �God�s strength was poured into me, I was blessed MORE than the women attending, and I keep praying for God�s plan and purpose in my life to be fulfilled to give Him all the praise, honor and glory!!!� Truly an amazing experience� I have told God many times that because my life has journeyed in this direction then, I I hope He will use my story to help other�s come closer to Him and trust in Him. I hope He continues in this direction but again, let His will be done�not mine. The next day, I had the honor and privilege to be on a cancer panel with 3 other adults at the Inver Hills Community College with the 2nd Semester Nursing Students. Wow�. One of the adults was Jackie Ryan from Goodhue. Her daughter was one of the two organizers. We answered questions pertaining to our cancer journey. My answers, of course, were from the parent view point as I could never answer what it is like to have cancer myself. I have so much respect for those who are enduring, or have endured, the cancer and the treatments themselves. What a gift to give our thoughts, opinions, and experiences to those students to help them better prepare for when they will be working with oncology patients themselves. I am ALL ABOUT making the situation better for everyone involved!!!

Thursday morning, I had a meeting at St. Mary�s for the Children�s Remembrance Celebration which was held in September. And Friday, I got to take Ethan and 4 of his friends to Chuck E. Cheese�s in Burnsville. The drive home was NOT pretty!! **What month are we in???** So, I thank and praise, God, for the blessed week He gave me�. Like I said, I crashed yesterday. I am grateful that today is a good day�just lots to do if we are having Ethan�s party tomorrow. I need to quick typing and talking. But, I won�t end on that. I want to end with prayers for the loneliness for me and my boys. Missing Tim and Bryce is a never-ending battle. Life is so different in our home. The discipline is always a challenge but I am reminded that there are many single parents out there trying to handle it like me. I ask for prayers of patience, endurance, guidance, a willing heart, Christ-like love, to be surrounded by Godly people, strength from God alone and JOY�. I miss that Tim is not here patiently waiting to work in the fields. *Please pray for the farmers!!!* I miss that he is not here helping me plan his son�s b-day party. I miss that he is not playing volleyball with us and so much more. But, life is what it is� I am grateful for the time I had with him and Bryce. I look forward to the plan and purpose that God has for my life. I have seen Him bring so much goodness and blessings to us, and many other�s, from our situation!! I totally and completely trust in His presence and His healing in my life. I hope you do, too. God�s abundant blessings to you all��.

Keep the prayers coming for Will Canan and his treatment for his relapse brain cancer. His CB page is www.caringbridge.org/mn/willcanan.
www.caringbridge.org/visit/gailmenefee
www.caringbridge.org/visit/wendyturnidge
www.caringbridge.org/visit/chrisr
www.caringbridge.org/visit/emeryfamily
www.caringbridge.org/mn/joellesyverson www.caringbridge.org/visit/emmafogarty
As always, THANK YOU FOR THE PRAYERS!!! Keep 'em coming!!!

Please continue the prayers for our families who are hurting from the heartbreaking loss of their loved one's:
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jacksonschneider
www.caringbridge.org/visit/wendyturnidge
www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaachall
www.caringbridge.org/visit/lisaholter
www.caringbridge.org/visit/amytaylor
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jamieoreilly

Serenity Prayer:
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

~We will ALWAYS love and adore you, Tim & Bryce~

"I pray that Chist will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in Him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love really is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now glory be to God! By His mighty power at work within us, He is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope." Ephesians 3:17-20

With Huge Continuous Faith~

Susie, Mitchell, Logan, Joel & Ethan Breuer

Monday, September 7, 2009 3:13 PM CDT

HANDS OF HOPE 5K Run & 1 Mile Fun Run
September 12, 2009...Saturday
Goodhue, MN
4:00 pm 5K/1 mile Rosie Park
5-8 pm Hog Roast Lion's Community Center; 5 & under free, 6-11 $5, 12 & older $8
Live Music Concert with Raffle during Hog Roast meal.
To Pre-Register Please Complete and Mail in the *Registration Form* If you would like to participate in the 5k run.
Register on-site from 3-3:45 pm at Rosie Park; $20 in advance, $25 on-site
1 mile walkers register with Hands of Hope bracelet

"I press on toward the goal to win the prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward." Philippians 3:14

"So we don't look at the troubles we can see right now; rather we look forward to what we have not yet seen. For the troubles we see will soon be over, but the joys to come last forever". 2 Corinthians 4:18

It's another New Day. I have soooo much to write... Where do I start?! Well, school starts tomorrow for Mitch and Logan. Wow...9th grade and 7th grade. Where does the time go??? Joel will be starting 4th grade on Thursday, and Ethan has his first official day of Kindergarten on Wednesday!!! My baby's in Kindergarten! He is soooo excited. I just hope that he remembers that he doesn't need to share every single thought that crosses his mind...(so much like his mother). He's the kind of kid that tells it like it is. Gotta love his honesty...most of the time. Logan has his first football game tomorrow afternoon. He loves his sports! I think that they are all gonna miss their summer-freedom, though. I am looking forward to structure but not so much the busyness of events and homework at the same time. It is what it is... I am totally learning to love and appreciate life, just as it is. My trust in God's plan continues each and every day. Even on the down days, I trust in God's plan.

We went to Carol & Jer's cabin one last time this weekend. We just got home about an hour ago. One last hurrah before school starts. It was great as the Ryan's and Huemann's also joined us. Thanks to the Tipcke's for being so gracious to all of us! There were 17 kids and 7 adults. That gets to be a lot of people in one lake home! We still had a great time! Mitch did some waterskiing, with Mikayla and Dillon, which he loves. We had a bonfire each night and lots of good food. It was a great get-away. I, of course, love watching my boys have fun! Now, back to reality...laundry, weekly plan sheet, games, planning meals, organizing, work, normal bedtime routine, etc. I am truly trying to learn to accept my life as it is by the grace of God. Tim and Bryce are gone. It still hurts as if it was the same day that we lost them... But, God continues to pour out His strength, His grace, His love... I see it in all of you. Thank you for your messages of encouragement, hope, love and support. To Kathy who signed on Sunday, I would love to hear from you again via email. I would love to know if we did indeed meet at Mayo. Will you be at the Children's Remembrance Ceremony on Sunday? I would love to meet you again and give you a hug. Please let me know. To all of our faithful readers and followers...I get tears in my eyes knowing how good our God is... It is God's work that our paths have crossed. So many of you endure the same pain that we do every day. I too feel your pain. I wish I could take it all away. I believe that one of the most important blessings throughout this journey is the growth that we are choosing to receive through our pain. It is the trust that we find in our Lord that gets us through each day. And, so many of you have not endured this pain but you have chosen to carry our pain with you, you have held us and prayed for us, just to ease our load... YOU amaze me! Life is a choice... I choose to live. I praise God for each and every one of you...

Now the next thing on my mind is our exciting Hands of Hope 5K/1 Mile Fun Run Walk at 4:00pm at Rosie Park in Goodhue!!!! This coming Saturday will be here before we know it! I'm soooo excited and a bit nervous. It's the first time we've planned one of these events. Please say many prayers for everything to fall into place just as God has planned it. He has already blessed us immensely!!! I pray for continued support, guidance, and prayers for the children and their families. Bryce would be so excited and so happy to be helping the children. The thought brings tears to my eyes... I could just see him beaming... His million-dollar smile is ear to ear and his eyes are twinkling with delight... I wish he could be here to see it all unfold...each event we've done. I hope that he is able to watch from heaven... I believe he can and he does. But, all the praise and glory always goes to God!!! Oh, I better not forget to mention that we are having the hog roast at the Lion's Community Center from 5-8pm with the concert with my sister's and their musical friends from 5:30-7:30pm with lots of awesome raffle prizes. Praying also for great weather! Thanking all those who have donated anything and those who are volunteering that day! I hope to see many of you on Saturday!

Sunday will be another emotional day for us but a good day. We have the Mayo Children's Remembrance Ceremony. It is a yearly event, our 3rd year, that is put together by some wonderful people who continue to show compassion for families who have lost a child. It is a day (actually 2 hrs.) filled with memories, tears, laughter, and HOPE. It is truly a beautiful event. Once again, I am praising God for His good work. I pray for God's blessings and presence upon that day, also.

I have a very dear friend who has been by my side since I was 11 years old--I think, it's been a long time! Her name is Jodi. I love her dearly. Her sister, Vickie, was in a motorcycle accident on May 23rd. They are having an awesome benefit for Vickie on Sept. 19th at the Zumbrota VFW. I wanted to add Jodi's words about Vickie and the benefit because I think it is going to be a huge success! Vickie's faith has always been so inspiring to so many... From Jodi:
On May 23rd of this year, my sister, Vickie Thompson was severely injured in a motorcycle accident in Rochester, MN. She was hospitalized for 3 months and is finally home living with our parents recovering from a TBI (traumatic brain injury). Doctors told us it can take 1 1/2 to 2 years for the brain to heal. She is currently in rehab for cognitive therapy and near the end of October will have her bone flap placed back in her skull. She has accumulated several expenses and friends and family members have come together to put on a Benefit to help her with these expenses while she recovers.
Here is her website, http://www.vickiethompson.com/ and her caring page site, http://www.carepages.com/carepages/vthompson create membership & visit vthompson. Thank you to everyone!

And finally, but most importantly, our friend, Will Canan, has had some disturbing news of a new growth appearance at his brain stem where the cancer had begun in 2004. Will is one of these most amazing children that we have met along this journey. He is strong and brave. He is peaceful and powerful. He is committed and loving. He is awesome! Please pray for God's healing power in his life to remove any unhealthy cells and to bring him trust and peace as he continues to fight this fight so bravely. We just adore him and his family. His CB page is www.caringbridge.org/mn/willcanan. Please send them prayers and well wishes. Thank you.

Now I must go and get to work! There's lots to do before Saturday and this week alone! I feel it so strongly in my heart to share this scripture again--moving it up from the bottom of the page. Remember to Live. Laugh. Love... Sharing God's love... Here it is:

"I pray that Chist will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in Him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love really is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now glory be to God! By His mighty power at work within us, He is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope." Ephesians 3:17-20

Please continue to send Jackson's family prayers of strength, peace, healing, and trust in the Lord as they continue on their journey without Jackson by their side... Love you, buddy! www.caringbridge.org/visit/jacksonschneider

Pray for healing for my dear Mary Kay sister Director Gail Menefee who is going through so much more treatments again for relapsed cancer. This beast causes so much pain. Pray for Christ's strength for our friends, and pray for their healing and peace.
www.caringbridge.org/visit/gailmenefee
www.caringbridge.org/visit/wendyturnidge
www.caringbridge.org/visit/chrisr
www.caringbridge.org/visit/emeryfamily
www.caringbridge.org/mn/joellesyverson www.caringbridge.org/visit/emmafogarty
www.caringbridge.org/mn/willcanan
As always, THANK YOU FOR THE PRAYERS!!! Keep 'em coming!!!

Please continue the prayers for our families who are hurting from the heartbreaking loss of their loved one's:
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jacksonschneider
www.caringbridge.org/visit/wendyturnidge
www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaachall
www.caringbridge.org/visit/lisaholter
www.caringbridge.org/visit/amytaylor
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jamieoreilly

Serenity Prayer:
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

~We will ALWAYS love and adore you, Tim & Bryce~

"I pray that Chist will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in Him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love really is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now glory be to God! By His mighty power at work within us, He is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope." Ephesians 3:17-20

With Huge Continuous Faith~

Susie, Mitchell, Logan, Joel & Ethan Breuer

Monday, August 10, 2009 11:21 AM CDT

Monday, August 3, 2009 4:03 PM CDT

Monday, July 20, 2009 10:12 AM CDT

Thursday, July 16, 2009 8:27 AM CDT

Sunday, June 21, 2009 8:39 PM CDT

Friday, May 22, 2009 10:48 AM CDT

Monday, May 18, 2009 8:45 AM CDT

Saturday, May 2, 2009 11:03 AM CDT

"I press on toward the goal to win the prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward." Philippians 3:14

"So we don't look at the troubles we can see right now; rather we look forward to what we have not yet seen. For the troubles we see will soon be over, but the joys to come last forever". 2 Corinthians 4:18

UPDATED: Tuesday, May 5th 10:15 AM
Confirmation went very well. Praise God... He is ever-present in our lives. Mitchell's faith statement was beautiful. I'll ask him tomorrow if I can put it on here. It was from the scripture: James 1:2-4.

** Mitchell's Faith Statement: I chose James 1:2-4. It says, "Dear brothers and sisters, whenever trouble comes your way, let it be an opportunity for joy. For when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be strong in character and ready for anything." I chose this verse because my faith has been tested from my brother and my dad both passing away 17 months apart from each other. I know there will be many more trials, but from those troubles will come opportunities for joy. I believe that my endurance and character has been developing. Because of these troubles and joys, I believe that in my faith I will be ready for anything in my life to come.**

We had family here for lunch. Mitch was full of joy all day long. He had everyone smiling and laughing. I'm so proud of him. He is an amazing young man... We went to my sister, Julie's, later to visit. We took more pictures there. I am hoping to put some of them on the CB page, especially of Jordan and Mitchell. Thank you, God, for making the day go so smoothly.

I'll come right out with what is on my mind today... May is a hard month for me. Bryce's birthday is May 18th, as many of you know. He would have been 11 this year... I will ask all of you to give blood in honor of his birthday, again this year. He would have wanted that. We had great results last year at the Mayo Hilton Blood Bank. That is where his blood products for his transfusions came from. He received a total of 98 transfusions during his almost 4 years of treatments. The supervisor there met with me last month to get details about our family story to share in her presentation in New Jersey on donating blood. I pray that more people give blood because of Bryce Breuer and his story. I pray that more people become a "Donor" on their driver's license because of Tim Breuer. We/he donated his tissue, bone, and eyes for other's in need. We have received letters from the Eye Donor Bank of the success of his donation for other's. A couple of weeks ago, I received a phone call from the Nat'l Donor Center asking if I would like to know where Tim's tissue and bone donations have gone to. Of course, I grabbed my paper and pencil and scribbled like a mad woman! **Giving to other's and expecting nothing in return is soooo 'Tim Breuer'** At that time, they still had much of his tissue (which takes longer to prepare for donation) ready to be shipped out for transplant. Much of his tissue donation had already been shown that it was sent to Oregon, Washington, Florida, Texas, Alaska, and Maryland. In Maryland, an aoritic artery transplant was performed on 3/26/09. In Indiana, a saphenous (?sp) vein transplant was done on 3/9/09. Another one was being shipped out soon. And, three of his femoral arteries had been transplanted already. At the end of the phone call, I shared our story with her. Her response was, "He left quite a legacy." My jaw dropped! I had been hearing the word "legacy" in my head all morning...not the song, just the word. Wow... Tim would have been so pleased--but of course, would have taken NO glory--to know that he had helped so many other's... Again, I praise God... So, my point is, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, consider being a "donor" in memory of Tim and also give blood in memory of Bryce. I'm so proud of them...

May 22nd would have been me and Tim's 16th wedding anniversary... **This brings me to tears.** We always had a personal joke, which had included the boys over the last few years, that I have to share. I was soooo ready to get married a year before we were married. So years later, every time the conversation came up or our anniversary came around, I would say (or have said this year), like every year, "It could have been 17 years." And, Tim would have replied, "Yep, it could've been but some things just take time. I wasn't ready yet." He was so sly... You see, he was such a procrastinator! And, he was soooo laid-back. We knew we were going to marry each other 3 months into our relationship back in 1990. But he finally proposed to me in May of 1992. We were married in May of '93. He sooooo enjoyed making me wait, that little stinker! Anyway, I thought we would have celebrated our 25th and our 60th wedding anniversaries together. That was 'my plan' anyway... I would always say to him when we would see an eldery couple holding hands..."Look, honey! That will be us when we are old and gray!" And, he would respond with, "Yes, dear." One of my most precious memories and favorite things to do was to hold my husbands hand... You can see that in many of our pictures. I LOVED HOLDING TIM BREUER'S STRONG, 'RUGGED' (his word, by the way) HAND!!! I will NEVER forget holding his hand... I even held his hand in bed, at times... Sometimes,...I drove him CRAZY wanting to hold his hand! I just LOVED touching him. He was all mine. I was all his. We were one... I miss him so very much. I miss holding my Brycer's precious, fragile, gentle, soft hand, too... I will never forget holding his hand either. I can still feel them... Praise God for that because that is one of my fears...forgetting things about them. I have to trust that God will always provide, even the memories...

May is also when our family planted the garden together. It was a family deal and family time together all throughout the summer, too. We have a very large garden. And, Tim and Bryce were 'farmer's at heart'... They loved gardening. Tim loved the big crops! He didn't like the taste of strawberries but he thought we needed to take our strawberries out and replant some 'big strawberries' for some reason. He was so funny that way. Planting the garden together was a big job with all 7 of us. Now, we are down to 5. We couldn't do it on our own so I've asked Shell (Tim's sister) and Ryan to be a part of our garden this year. Shell, myself and our boys are going to plant some of it today. **This also brings me to tears.** I wish so badly that Tim and Bryce could be here with us. But, they are not. I cannot change that. I am accepting it. It's just hard... Tim was such an 'active' father. He would work his hardest on the field work, farming and trucking and still put in so much 'dad and husband' time. He thought nothing of it to get only 4 hours of sleep. He was an incredible example in so many ways. And now, I look out into the fields and see all the farmer's planting their crops. **This too brings me to tears. I guess I'm a cry baby today.** Tim did all the planting of the crops--almost 1,400 acres. Many times, we would be driving home in the summertime, and Tim would be driving super slow. I would look at him to ask why he was driving so slow only to see him checking out his crops, actually his 'rows' of crops... He would lean back and say, "Boys... See those rows?... Straightest rows in the county!" That (and one picture of himself where he called himself 'rugged') was the only time he was known to be 'bragging up' his work... I love that memory... He was so awesome! Now, his dad is planting all the crops and farming it on his own with the help of Mitch, sometimes Logan, and other family members.

I still can't believe it... Sometimes, I'm still in shock. He's gone......................... They're both gone... Nothing is the same. Life is so different. Some of the goodness in our situation is that I am different, too. I need to thank God for that. I am a better Christian, a better mom, a better person because of the tragedies in my life. I choose to use my situation for the good of God...for His purpose and plan for me. I am far from perfect. There is always--til the day I die--room for improvement!!! Anyway, I just miss soooooo, soooooo badly seeing Tim in his oil-stained jeans and shirt, JD jacket, dirt-speckled glasses with grease smeared on his whiskery cheeks. He was always so handsome to me, no matter what he was wearing or doing... I miss seeing him walk across the farm and climb into a tractor or truck. I miss watching him drive into the yard and giving us his silly wave with the air horn blasting. I miss bringing him lunch to the field. I miss watching him work with his dad... They were such an awesome team! **Please pray for Tim's dad and his mom... This is not easy for any of us.** I miss watching him work with his big boys in the field and his small boys in the garden. I miss all of us playing baseball and going on the bike trails together. Last year, he and Ethan planted almost the whole garden by themselves! He was so proud of Ethan and his hard work ethic! (Where did Ethan get that from?! His dad!) Ethan still remembers that and talks about it. I miss watching Bryce shovel in his breakfast super fast and then, slip on his rubber boots quickly because he was afraid his dad would leave to go in the field without him... It was adorable. Tim NEVER would have left without his little farmer, Bryce!!! Bryce would sit in that tractor all day long and even nap in there so he wouldn't have to leave... As Tim would say (jokingly, as always), "Ah, the memories..." Boy, have I had some good cries throughout this entry... I so needed that...

I need to finish up now. I've been here an hour. Yep, I'm windy...as Tim would say. I miss adult conversation and companionship at home, a lot. It's hard NOT to be lonely for my husband...and my son. I just needed to vent and release today, I guess. Now, I'm gonna go get my focus on and run Jesus through my head all day long in all I do. Because, I am truly grateful for my life!!! I am grateful for the time I have with my boys on this earth. I am grateful for the time I had with Bryce and Tim, although short-lived...at least I had it! I am grateful that God has a plan and a purpose in my life. I am trying to remember everyday that through these trials, there are many blessings to be grateful for. God is faithful, steadfast, and constant in my life. I pray that people will learn to depend on the Lord and give Him all the glory!!! I pray that I am helping other's through my joys and sorrows. I am thankful that I am forgiven and have a future filled with HOPE. So, I will wait, HOPE, and trust in God because I am a survivor... Appreciation, gratitude, and love to all of you!!!

Pray for Chris Rogers' healing and Quinn Emery and her family, Joelle & Emma, please! Keep praying for Jackson & Will, too!!!
www.caringbridge.org/visit/chrisr
www.caringbridge.org/visit/emeryfamily
www.caringbridge.org/mn/joellesyverson www.caringbridge.org/visit/emmafogarty
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jacksonschneider
www.caringbridge.org/mn/willcanan
As always, THANK YOU FOR THE PRAYERS!!! Keep 'em coming!!!

Please continue the prayers for our families who are hurting from the heartbreaking loss of their loved one's:
www.caringbridge.org/visit/wendyturnidge
www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaachall
www.caringbridge.org/visit/lisaholter
www.caringbridge.org/visit/amytaylor
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jamieoreilly

Serenity Prayer:
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

~We will ALWAYS love and adore you, Tim & Bryce~

"I pray that Chist will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in Him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love really is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now glory be to God! By His mighty power at work within us, He is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope." Ephesians 3:17-20

With Huge Continuous Faith~

Susie, Mitchell, Logan, Joel & Ethan Breuer

Sunday, April 26, 2009 6:42 AM CDT

Sunday, April 12, 2009 2:11 PM CDT

Wednesday, March 11, 2009 10:12 AM CDT

"I press on toward the goal to win the prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward." Philippians 3:14

"So we don't look at the troubles we can see right now; rather we look forward to what we have not yet seen. For the troubles we see will soon be over, but the joys to come last forever". 2 Corinthians 4:18

3/12/09 Update: I am very excited for this Saturday! Before Bryce passed away, he was very excited and talking about the Jaycee Wrestling Tournament that happens every year in Goodhue. He was so sick but still had his wishful heart to wrestle in that tournament. He died then, 2 weeks prior to the tournament... The next year, Coach Sutter renamed the tournament the Bryce Breuer Memorial Jaycee Wrestling Tournament. It was so cool, so emotional, so Bryce... Well this year, guess what it is named? It is the Tim & Bryce Breuer Memorial Jaycee Wrestling Tournament. Tim was a wrestler who was coached by Coach Sutter. Tim was so great at working with his boys during wrestling season, and throughout the year. This is a very special day to us... I am really looking forward to it. Well, I have even more great news! Bryce's buddies mom's and myself have started a group called (Bryce's) Hands of Hope. Our mission statement is: "A group committed to carrying out Bryce Breuer's legacy of compassion by offering hope and support to children facing difficult challenges." We are holding 3-4 fundraisers a year to provide financial assistance to families of children who are fighting their own medical battles. These families can use the money for medical expenses, gifts for the family, towards trips for the family or whatever they would like. We are so excited about this! Bryce's classmates are also involved. I will always believe that God did hand-select each one of them... Our first fundraiser is at the tournament on Saturday, March 14th. We have (with Bryce's classmates) created beaded pins to "Pin Cancer". People who purchase them can place them on their caps, bags/backpacks, shoelaces, etc. They are already going like crazy! It's been so much fun! If anyone is interested in purchasing a pin or sending a donation, contact me via email at sbreuer@marykay.com. Our next fundraiser will be on May 16 in Goodhue. We are having a garage sale with food and drinks to purchase. Again, we are sooooo excited about this!!! This group is soooo Bryce Breuer! He was so compassionate about children who are fighting their own battles. He wished so badly that they did not have to endure what they were going through. He cared so much about them! He had such a giving heart. Please say prayers for our group to serve other's as the Lord wants us to...

We are rolling into 8 months without Tim. I can't believe it's already been that long... It is as they say, "Life goes on" even though you wish it would stop and wait for you somedays... That's not gonna happen. We've actually had some good days lately. It's still very rocky on our path but we really try to keeping moving on and find a bit of joy in every day... Did I ever tell you that I had a dream maybe about 2 months after Tim died that I heard Bryce and Tim say, "Keep moving on"? I didn't see them, I just heard them. I knew it was them... That, to me, is a very comforting dream. I have not dreamt about Tim or Bryce much at all. I pray for dreams of them. I figure God will bring them on His own. I must wait patiently.

The boys are doing pretty good. They have their moments. They miss their dad everyday. Logan just told me the other day that he misses his dad teaching them things, wrestling around with them, joking with them and doing family things together. What hit me the most was "teaching them things"... I know that God will provide with either giving me the words, or friends and family stepping in to teach them things but somedays I wonder will they be lacking things because their dad isn't here to teach them? He was such a great dad... He taught them so much already in such little time. I'm not kidding you. To me, Tim was the best dad in the whole world. I told him that quite often. He would totally blow me off with it. He was so humble, just like Bryce. Why is that? These 2 humble people are now gone?... I won't try to figure it out. It will make my brain hurt, and it already hurts from trying to crunch numbers for taxes. Tim did all the farm and personal taxes, I did my Mary Kay taxes which I am starting today. It's true what they say... When your spouse dies there is so much more to do. He was so helpful with the kids and the house. He was my comforter. He complimented me and made me feel good about who I am, no matter what. Jesus, Jesus, Jesus... And, once again, the pipes are frozen to the house. I am sure that the pipes have NEVER been frozen this many times in one winter!!! Tim always took care of this issue. It has been my fault at times this winter because I don't watch the weather forecast and then leave the bathroom faucet dripping at night when it is so cold. But, the other times, it hasn't been my doing. Thank goodness because that can get hard on the self-esteem issue.... Anyway, Arnie has been wonderful to help me with all of these house issues when they arise. It had to be part of God's plan that Tim's parents only live a mile up the road... I don't know what I'd do without them!

For those of you who have also lost a spouse, you know that the loneliness is much more painful and difficult than you ever imagined it to be. Now that I�ve lost my spouse, I need to accept my �new life� without him. I need to find out who I am on my own as an independent woman who is no longer married (which really stinks!). Tim and I did as the Bible says, we united as one in marriage on May 22, 1993. Our marriage grew to be a stronger bond �as one� from then on. Our bond was beautiful� Now, I am one by myself. The loneliness has been too much to bare some days. But, as I read and learn and try to heal, I am also growing through my daily struggles. The lonely days are still there but now are barable. I am finding out who I am as Susie Breuer and that I can do this on my own with God�s strength. �I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.� I repeat that over and over again some days. I also say the Serenity Prayer whenever I think of it because I do need to accept the things that I cannot change.

Serenity Prayer:
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

We are taught in our Grief Share meetings that when Tim and Bryce (our loved ones) died, we did not die with them. We are still alive, living and breathing here on this earth. We are taught that we must make an effort to heal. We must continue on the journey. We must make the most of our new life and find joy. My boys need joy. I need joy. I know and believe with all my heart that God has big plans for all of us. It�s the waiting that gets to me. Grieving is HARD WORK! I just want to heal. I choose to heal. I want to get better, not bitter. These things WILL happen with God�s grace and God�s guidance. I know that He is �working� on our future in the background scenes. I try to plan �my life� out everyday. Well, all I can say is that�s a big mistake. God already has a plan for my life. My devotions told me the other day to continue praying for God�s will. And, if the goals that I am pursuing are not in His plan, then I should pray that He would gradually weaken my desires. I think that is beautiful beyond words� We are all human. We are all �control freaks� by nature. It only makes sense to give it all to God, give Him all our desires and ask Him to help us pursue the desires of His heart for each one of us. That is a big part of my focus this week�

Pastor Mikes sermon on Sunday was wonderful. It was about 'bad things happening to good people'. He said a man wrote a book saying it was about luck. Pastor Mike didn't agree. I do not agree either. Then, he asked, "Was it about chance? Or probability? No, it was providence." God doesn't want these bad things to happen to us. He never said life would be easy. But, there is so much sin in the world since Adam and Eve. It wasn't poor or bad luck that Tim and Bryce both died. I don't know if I'll ever know the answer. I know that I "plan" on asking God when I arrive at heaven's gates but then I think, "At that point, it won't matter to me anymore!" What it's about is knowing, trusting, and believing that God will get us through this and bring so much joy, grace, and mercy! There will be VICTORY through Christ and his gift of salvation to us. Again, I believe that with my whole heart... During Pastor Mike's prayers at the end of the service when we pray for the "whole church", he prayed for children who have lost a parent. **That hit home!!!** He prayed for the surviving parent to listen to the Father's/God's guidance as they raised their children. And then, he prayed that their faith would not weaken through their trials. BEAUTIFUL... Do you see what I mean? God IS good! God WILL provide!

There are more people to pray for so please add these wonderful people to your prayer list! God loves us communicating with Him about other's, about anything! Please talk to Him. Share with Him your joys and your sorrows. He just wants to have a conversation with you. He wants you to rely on Him, not the earthly needs we all have. It's a struggle each and everyday for me. But, I still gotta try! Joelle is a wife and mom who is passionate for Christ! She is a very gifted writer. I have been following her story for a couple months now. She has a brain tumor that has recurred again. Her CB page is www.caringbridge.org/mn/joellesyverson. Please join in prayer with her and her family. Emma Fogarty is a precious 7-year-old girl who has a brain tumor. She is so sweet. She is undergoing radiation and doing so well. Please go to her page, also, and give her prayers and well-wishes. Pray for her family, also. Her CB page is www.caringbridge.org/visit/emmafogarty. As always, THANK YOU FOR THE PRAYERS!!! Keep 'em coming!!!

Please continue to pour out your POWERFUL PRAYERS for Will Canan (www.caringbridge.org/mn/willcanan) and Jackson Schneider (www.caringbridge.org/visit/jacksonschneider). I wish you could all know these boys. They are amazing!!! Their families are amazing! Lift them up in prayer continuously for their healing, strength, and peace with trusting in the Lord. They are so special to our family...

Please continue the prayers for our families who are hurting from the heartbreaking loss of their loved one's:
www.caringbridge.org/visit/wendyturnidge
www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaachall
www.caringbridge.org/visit/lisaholter
www.caringbridge.org/visit/amytaylor
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jamieoreilly

~I love you, Sweetheart. I love you, my Brycie Boy...~

"I pray that Chist will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in Him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love really is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now glory be to God! By His mighty power at work within us, He is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope." Ephesians 3:17-20

With Huge Continuous Faith~

~Tim~ & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Wednesday, February 25, 2009 11:44 AM CST

Monday, February 16, 2009 2:36 PM CST

"I press on toward the goal to win the prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward." Philippians 3:14

I feel compelled to write in Bryce's journal today. My heart is so open to God's plan. My wounds are open and weeping. You've all heard, known, and felt my/our pain over the last 5 years. It is upon my heart to share some words with you that touched my very soul today... They came from my Hope Devotional that I received from Ree Erickson, Silas' mom. Silas passed away over a year ago from Neuroblastoma. I know the sadness in the world can be too much for some of you. But, take heart, and know that God is working through all of the sadness. Even though we can't see Him and His work, He IS working... I've seen so much joy--which I am soooo very grateful for--and pain in my life. God is constant and ever-present. As Nancy Guthrie wrote in the devotional for today, (and I LOVE this by the way!!!)..."God is our only source of HOPE...we must cry out to Him to save us because we are powerless to save ourselves...(and I am) desperate to see You reveal Yourself in the midst of the storm." Amen!!!

Their are more up days than down days because I have HOPE and because I look to the Lord for strength! I have HOPE that God will see us through this storm. I have HOPE that He will provide for all our needs--not just our wants. I have HOPE that He is strengthening us in our weaknesses. I have HOPE that He is teaching us to depend on Him instead of ourselves and our earthly needs. And, I have HOPE, and believe, that I will see the face of Jesus and then, Tim and Bryce, one day in heaven.

I praise God for all the beautiful, giving, selfless people in our lives who continue to pray for and support us. The boy's wrestling is coming to a close, and we have loved every minute of it! Tim and Bryce would have been so very proud!!! God has strengthened me through it all because it has NOT been easy to sit on the side not knowing what to yell, and then watching the dad's coach and hug their son's. Tim was a Super Dad! He left nothing undone. I watched the man of my dreams become more than I ever imagined him to be in 18 1/2 years because he trusted, and listened to, the Lord. Even though he argued with Him, too. He learned that many things in life were out of our control. He wanted to set a good example of a father and husband, and WHAT A LEGACY HE LEFT BEHIND... Amazing. I am so grateful to God that He chose me to be Tim's wife and the mother of these 5 incredible boys... Now, I have to stop crying and get going. Thank you for listening. This may have been my quickest entry ever! (Tim would be so surprised!) I will update again this week. FYI: This Sunday, February 22nd will be Bryce's 2nd heavenly birthday. I can't believe it's been 2 years since I last held my son, touched his hair and held his hands, heard his soft, silly voice, and felt his kiss on my right cheek... I am so happy for them both,...really, inside, I am. I have so much more to say but need to run. I love and adore you all... Keep the prayers coming and keep reading about Will and Jackson next.

Please pour out the POWERFUL PRAYERS for Will Canan (www.caringbridge.org/mn/willcanan). They did not do surgery last week. His mom, Liz, does beautiful updates as does MariClair, Jackson's mom. Please follow their pages with all your trust in the Lord. Love them and support them. They need all of us so very much. They are 2 very special boys who have inspired so many people in this world. Again, God sent them "equipped"... I praise God that we have met so many wonderful people in our lifetime. Pray for their families also. Here is Jackson's CB page: www.caringbridge.org/visit/jacksonschneider. We love and care so very much for them!!!

Please continue the prayers for our families who are hurting from the heartbreaking loss of their loved one's:
www.caringbridge.org/visit/wendyturnidge
www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaachall
www.caringbridge.org/visit/lisaholter
www.caringbridge.org/visit/amytaylor
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jamieoreilly

~I love you, Sweetheart. I love you, my Brycie Boy...~

"I pray that Chist will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in Him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love really is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now glory be to God! By His mighty power at work within us, He is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope." Ephesians 3:17-20

With Huge Continuous Faith~

~Tim~ & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Saturday, February 7, 2009 7:44 AM CST

"I press on toward the goal to win the prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward." Philippians 3:14

Good morning, everyone. Sorry for the delay in updates. It's been busy but also up and down with the emotions. Sunday and Monday were my worst days ever...Wow. I am trying to read through a book that is teaching me how to heal. Grieving is hard work... And then to try to help my boys grieve too... Today is a pretty good day. Sunday and Monday were not-so-much. My boys are getting by and keeping busy with wrestling and school. They are having their ups and downs, too. They miss their Dad, and brother, sooooo much. I must trust that it's all in God's perfect timing, life that is... I try everyday to be Thankful for and Trusting in God's plan. I try to focus on Jesus' Peace and Presence in my life. I try to give Him Prayers and Praise whenever I think of it. These are my words of focus that help me to press on and persevere. I gotta have a focus... Otherwise, I get too caught up in all the little, and big, stuff. I hope you are all well.

We have yet another very special friend who just found out that he has a tiny spot in his right ventricle of his brain, again. His name is Will Canan (www.caringbridge.org/mn/willcanan). I have asked you to pray for him before. Please lift him and Jackson up in POWERFUL PRAYERS for their total and complete healing on this earth. They are 2 very special boys who have inspired so many people in this world. Again, God sent them "equipped"... I praise God that we have met so many wonderful people in our lifetime. Pray for their families also. Here is Jackson's CB page: www.caringbridge.org/visit/jacksonschneider. We love and care so very much for them!!!

I have to run but wanted you all to know that I did not fall off the face of the earth. I know that you all care so very much!!! Thank you for your continued support and love...near or far. We appreciate you more than you will ever know. I do wish I could put it all into words...

Please continue the prayers for our families who are hurting from the heartbreaking loss of their loved one's:
www.caringbridge.org/visit/wendyturnidge
www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaachall
www.caringbridge.org/visit/lisaholter
www.caringbridge.org/visit/amytaylor
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jamieoreilly

~I love you, Sweetheart. I love you, my Brycie Boy...~

"I pray that Chist will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in Him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love really is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now glory be to God! By His mighty power at work within us, He is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope." Ephesians 3:17-20

With Huge Continuous Faith~

~Tim~ & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Monday, January 19, 2009 9:24 AM CST

"I press on toward the goal to win the prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward." Philippians 3:14

Good morning... It's a New Day. Thank you, God...

I have so much to say (and don't know where to start) that I am sure I will forget something so wish me luck. This could be a long and "winded" entry, as Tim would say...I am "windy"--remember, he was a man with little words, (brief and to-the-point) most of the time. Short, simple, yes or no answers was common with him. I would always say, "Could you expaaaaaand on that???" He would say, "What's there to expand on?" I would ask him, "Well, what are you thinking?" And, he would do his famous PAUSE and say, "Nothing." **That PAUSE that I grew to know and love is part of the reason why I have learned to have patience in my life.** I would always come back with, "Are you kidding me??? Tim Breuer, a man of intelligence, knowledge, and wisdom is thinking NOTHING??? There is NO WAY that you are thinking NOTHING, right now! I KNOW that the wheels are always turning inside that head of your's..." It became one of many private jokes between the two of us... Oh, how I miss those Love-of-Your-Life private jokes with my completely silly, yet sometimes serious, jokester... He had such a dry sense of humor (most of the time) with his oh-so-well-known-for monotone voice expression. I remember so many of my friends calling the house and asking for me right away because they weren't sure that he wanted to talk--he never did like the phone. They would quick ask for me, and he'd give me a comment as he handed me the phone saying, "I guess they don't want to talk to me" with a smirk on his face. I always knew when Jodi G. or Brenda H. or my Mom was calling because he would talk to them for awhile (like 30-60 seconds), especially giving them a hard time teasing them about something... He was soooooo funny that way. Everybody LOVED him... I just adored him... He knew that. I am so glad and so grateful that he knew that. Please tell your loved one's how much you love and adore them, everyday... Drive them crazy--like I did--if you have to!

It has been 6 months today since Tim took his last breath with me... Thursday will be 23 months since Bryce took his last breath on this earth. I feel so fortunate that I was there for their last breaths but somedays I wonder why all the trauma in my life? Bryce seizured for 2 1/2 hours before he went into his coma. It was so awful... I thought it was the worst day of my life...watching my son suffer even more. But doing chest compressions and CPR on my 37 year old husband--LOVE OF MY LIFE--only 17 months after the death of our son may have been worse. And then, telling our 4 sons that their Dad has died and hearing them scream "NO!!!!" and cry their eyes out was actually worst of all, I think... The trauma... I just don't get it. God help me. I miss my husband and son so very much. HOPE is what I live for but somedays I just want answers for the past and the future.

As I type, and the tears roll down my face, I give you my all. This is it folks, what you read today is what you get. I pour my heart out to you in the midst of my pain, and I'm not sure why. Maybe because so much pain has built up in the last 2 1/2 years. Maybe God wants me to do this so everyone accepts their blessings in their lives more. Maybe it is so those who are also suffering now know that they do not suffer alone, and that they are "normal". Sometimes I remind myself how Jesus suffered on the cross for me, and for you... I read in my HOPE devotional one day about the JOY Jesus felt (as Logan put it) to "live to die for us". He knew he was saving us by his suffering with his gift of eternal salvation. **And now, Jeremy Camp's song "There Will Be A Day" begins to play on the radio to remind me of the gifts that Jesus gives to us...Eternal Life in heaven and "that we are not walking alone, and the beauty that's in-store outweighs the hurt of lifes sting, we'll see Jesus face to face, he'll wipe away this sorrow that I face, to touch the scars that rescued me, there will be a day"... Thank you, God for that day that I somedays long for...

I started to clean our/my bedroom which is so big that it also became a storage room with all of Bryce's hospital stuff. I wish I had done it when Tim was alive because it is extremely difficult to do without him... I want to hear his comments, his memories, his love for his son that he admired so much. Bryce was our hero. He was incredible. He was brave, courageous, full of faith, loving and had such a great attitude. And, now I go through it all alone. Not only do I miss my husband tremendously but I am missing my son more than ever... I long to hear Tim's memories and comments about this or that with everything I find. Tim was so dedicated to his boys. He was firm and loving. He was amazing. Far from perfect, like the rest of us, but he was amazing.

I believe I am at the 57th phase in this journey (I say 57th sarcastically), and I am tired of going to sleep and waking up without my husband. My mother-in-law had a terrific idea for me yesterday. She said to write Tim a letter when I miss him so much. So, maybe this entry is also written to him. I know that "life goes on". I know that I didn't die when he did nor when Bryce died. I also know, and truly believe with my whole heart, that the only way that I, and my boys, will get through this will be with the love of God... That amazing love... That unconditional, forgiving, greater-than-life LOVE... Thank goodness for the grace He gives us, for the mercy He gives us, for the love He gives us. Please pray for our strength, peace, and joy. I do sometimes worry about my boys growing up without their amazing Father. Ethan is only 5. Thank goodness God gave him an incredible memory. I pray that he never loses his memories of his Dad. I pray that they will all release their emotions occasionaly and not keep them bottled up inside. They seem to be doing well but, as it seems to be for me it is the same for them...the farther out we get from Tim's death, the more we miss him and see the reality of him being gone from this earthly life. I also pray for Tim's parents and sister's... I love them all so very much. And, they hurt so bad too. Please continue to pray for their peace, strength, and joy also. Tim left his mark on many hearts...Bryce, too. We love and miss them so very much.

I also want to ask you for prayers for another family. Wendy Turnidge is a Mary Kay Director, like myself. She is a wonderful, beautiful young woman who has her own medical issues. Her husband, Mark, loved her so much. He went in for a routine medical procedure for his pacemaker lead. Everything went wrong in surgery and he "flew to Jesus" 2 days later with Chris Rice's "Come To Jesus" song which is one of our favorites. It was sung by my brother and sister, Chris and Julie, at Bryce's service. Now, Wendy must begin to adjust to her "new normal" in life... I don't wish this upon anyone. Please pray for her strength, physically and emotionally. Her CB page is www.caringbridge.org/visit/wendyturnidge. We must all learn to trust in the Lord...his plan and purpopse in our lives. We must place our faith in His hands. We must fall back into His arms and give all our battles to Him to fight for us. We must accept the MANY blessings that He gives us in our lives, and there are so many... Please keep your prayers (conversations with God that He loves!) coming for everyone in this broken world. There are many great things going on with His servants--all of you. We love and appreciate all of you...

Here is Jackson's CB page: www.caringbridge.org/visit/jacksonschneider. Do NOT let up on the Powerful Prayers for Jackson and his family!!! He is this amazing little boy that I wish everyone could know... I love him so very much...

Continued prayers for our families who are hurting from the heartbreaking loss of their loved one's:
www.caringbridge.org/visit/wendyturnidge
www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaachall
www.caringbridge.org/visit/lisaholter
www.caringbridge.org/visit/amytaylor
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jamieoreilly

~I love you, Sweetheart. I love you, my Brycie Boy...~

"I pray that Chist will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in Him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love really is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now glory be to God! By His mighty power at work within us, He is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope." Ephesians 3:17-20

With Huge Continuous Faith~

~Tim~ & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Thursday, January 1, 2009 1:43 PM CST

"I press on toward the goal to win the prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward." Philippians 3:14

Please pray your powerful prayers for Isaac Hall's family. He went to heaven at 6:10 pm yesterday. And yes, Sheila, as you put it so well...My heart bleeds for them. We love you, Isaac... That's all I can say for now. His CB page is: www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaachall

Lisa arrived at heavens gates at 11:15 this morning. Please send powerful prayers for her husband and their family's. Lisa's CB page is www.caringbridge.org/visit/lisaholter. Amy's service was yesterday. Continue the prayers for her husband, children, and family's. Amy's page is www.caringbridge.org/visit/amytaylor.

Please continue the powerful prayers for our little friend, Jackson Schneider. He is now in Vermont finding out the next plan of attack to the cancer in his body. Pray for his strength and endurance. Pray for his pain to be in control. Pray for his healing and trust in God's plan. We love you, Jackson and family! Here is Jackson's CB page: www.caringbridge.org/visit/jacksonschneider

Please continue your many prayers for Zach and the boys, Renee and Jeff, their extended families, and friends. Everyone loves and misses Jamie so much. She left her mark on this world and touched so many lives. Her love for life is shown through her boys and their awesome personalities and love for others. www.caringbridge.org/visit/jamieoreilly

~I love you, Sweetheart. I love you, my Brycie Boy...~

"I pray that Chist will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in Him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love really is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now glory be to God! By His mighty power at work within us, He is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope." Ephesians 3:17-20

With Huge Continuous Faith~

~Tim~ & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Tuesday, December 30, 2008 6:20 PM CST

"I press on toward the goal to win the prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward." Philippians 3:14

Heavenly Father, we come to You in prayer tonight for our little friend, Isaac Hall...Your precious son. Lord, I don't even know where to start, my heart is breaking, so I'm just going to say--Let Your will be done. You know Isaac's needs and the needs of his family. Please fill those needs. We give You praise and thanksgiving for this wonderful boy, whom You created so unique and so precious. He has brought so much JOY and so much LOVE and so many life lessons to so many people--family, friends, and strangers. What a servants heart You have created in him...his parents, too. Father, we pray for peace, guidance, healing, trust in You, endurance, strength and comfort for Isaac and his family. I also pray, that if it is at all possible, that Tim and Bryce are there with Isaac walking him Home with Jesus in Your perfect timing... May the Holy Spirit fill their home with overwhelming peace and love. Amen. Please pray without ceasing for Isaac and his family. As I said before, my heart is breaking for them. If Tim and Bryce can have their say to the Lord, they are there with Isaac. They loved him so very much... I do too... Isaac is currently home and on hospice as his kidneys and liver have shut down. His earthly journey is being finalized and he will be transitioning over to his New Journey and New Home in heaven... His CB page is: www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaachall

Please continue the powerful prayers for our little friend, Jackson Schneider. He is now in Vermont finding out the next plan of attack to the cancer in his body. Pray for his strength and endurance. Pray for his pain to be in control. Pray for his healing and trust in God's plan. We love you, Jackson and family! Here is Jackson's CB page: www.caringbridge.org/visit/jacksonschneider

Please continue your many prayers for Zach and the boys, Renee and Jeff, their extended families, and friends. Everyone loves and misses Jamie so much. She left her mark on this world and touched so many lives. Her love for life is shown through her boys and their awesome personalities and love for others. www.caringbridge.org/visit/jamieoreilly

I also ask you to continue to lift up Lisa in your prayers. She is in hospice in Rochester. Lisa's CB page is www.caringbridge.org/visit/lisaholter. Amy Taylor passed away on Saturday morning. She has left her legacy, too. She was loved by so many, especially her husband and children. Amy's page is www.caringbridge.org/visit/amytaylor.

As Jeremy Camp sings, There Will Be A Day when we will all see Jesus face to face. He will wipe away our sorrow. There will be no more tears or fears or pain... That trasition will be amazing. Until then, let's try to get God's work done on earth! Christmas went fairly well. Thank you for the prayers... We love and appreciate you all!!!

~I love you, Sweetheart. I love you, my Brycie Boy...~

"I pray that Chist will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in Him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love really is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now glory be to God! By His mighty power at work within us, He is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope." Ephesians 3:17-20

With Huge Continuous Faith~

~Tim~ & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Wednesday, December 24, 2008 7:13 AM CST

"I press on toward the goal to win the prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward." Philippians 3:14

Merry Christmas to everyone. I am always surprised when I find myself amazed at the giving, generosity, compassion, and kindness of so many wonderful people in this world. Thank you to all of you, first and foremost, for the prayers for our family. **Please keep them coming, this morning has not been a pleasant one...tired, early-risers, bickering, and a snappy parent. Just being real, I guess.** We are heading into Christmas Eve Day with an open-mind, I think. We all miss Tim so bad. Bryce should be here, too. Last Christmas was so terribly difficult without Bryce (but we survived it), and now here we are without Tim... Please pray for our strength to get through the next few days with lots of memories, laughter, and tears. God will be the ONLY way we get through this...I know that for a fact. We are survivors. We are so grateful for the love of our family and friends and strangers. We received a beautiful, faith-filled card with a gift certificate for a hotel stay and a couple of other gift cards from someone--whoever it was, THANK YOU. I know it originated somewhere from Camp Jornada, as Stacey was the one who gave it to me and also had one for the O'Reilly family. And, thank you for the call last night, Brenda. She wanted to know where a donation could be made. Of course, I said Camp Jornada. Praise God.

I will continue to persevere for God, my husband, all of my sons, and my purpose on this earth. I have to admit, I am not looking forward to the fun things Tim and I did together for our boys on Christmas Eve after we tucked them into bed. I know that there will be many tears shed tonight when I am alone for the first time doing all the "fun stuff"... I am a little nervous about our Christmas Eve service tonight. I don't want to cry like I think I will. I am always so emotional on Christmas Eve anyway. I miss my husband so much. But, I must persevere with strenth and courage for my sons... I found a card the other day that, if my husband was alive, I would have given to him this year. It is absolutely perfect for how I feel about him, especially over the last couple of years of our 15 year marriage. I don't care if people think I am crazy, I had to buy it and cry and cry and cry. I want to share it with you, then I think I will put it in our Christmas tree--Charlie Brown Christmas tree, I might add...but that's a whole new journal entry to laugh (with my husband from heaven) about. Here is the card:

For My Love at Christmas and Always~
My love, you are the center of my life,
the dearest friend and lover there could be.
When all the world is crazy and confusing,
you are my calm and my security.
I look into your eyes and find my soul mate.
I hear your voice and never feel alone.
Beside you, I believe in love unending
and feel the deepeset joy I've ever known.
Merry Christmas

And with that, I do realize, as they have taught us in Grief Share, that I didn't die with my husband... But, I had to share it because it is what I would have spoken to him if he were alive today. The great thing is...He KNEW how deeply and passionately I loved him. He KNEW that I adored him with my whole heart. He KNEW he was my favorite person on God's great earth. (He knew because I always told him and sometimes drove him crazy with that!) And now, he's gone. He's with our son. So, we will continue on...just as they would want us to. They want us to be happy. They want us to feel joy, again. They want us to persevere with admiration and gratefulness to God. Can you imagine what they must be thinking from heaven?! There are many unanswered questions in life... If I have learned anything in my past 5 1/2 years through this journey in my life, it is to be patient and wait upon the Lord... And so, I will do that with smiles, laughs, and tears. Whatever God brings to me, I will try to embrace. Life is too short, and precious, to sit out this dance. Please enjoy your life...and thank God everyday before your feet hit the floor. **And now, it is quiet and peaceful at my house with my boys folding clothes. Thank goodness God sent them "equipped" too.** We love and appreciate you all. I could never say that enough. Continue to read on and pray for our friends. Thank you and Merry Christmas... Celebrate the birth of our Lord and Savior.

Please continue to pray fervently for our little friend, Jackson Schneider. As I have said, Jackson is one of my favorite little people that I have met in my lifetime. Too many of these children have to fight at such a young age. Thank goodness God sends them "equipped". He will be going out to Vermont next week to start a new treatment. Do whatever you can to help; be it prayers, care packages or whatever. I will never forget the incredible things that people have done for us. As MariClair said this morning in her journal entry, "We are truly blessed with such giving, compassionate people. I read on someone elses CB site that the will gladly spend the rest of their lives paying it forward. I feel the same way. We have experienced such generosity and caring throughout Jackson's entire ordeal....all I want to do is return the kindness and giving to others when they are in need of any kind of help or support!" Dido from me and my family... Here is Jackson's CB page: www.caringbridge.org/visit/jacksonschneider

Do not let up on the powerful prayers for Isaac Hall, another one of our favorite little people, who fights his battle so courageously. He is on this roller coaster ride, too. He has been in and out of the ICU. He has been receiving dialysis treatments. And, he has fevers off and on. Please continue to (as Travis would say) "pray boldy for healing" and strength for Isaac and his family. His CB page is: www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaachall

I also ask you to lift up Lisa (a wonderful woman and wife) and Amy (a wonderful woman, wife, and mom to two small children) who continue their battles with cancer. Neither outcome is good, and they need strength from our prayers. Lisa's CB page is www.caringbridge.org/visit/lisaholter. Amy's page is www.caringbridge.org/visit/amytaylor.

Please continue your prayers for the O'Reilly family as they move forward into the Christmas season without Jamie. She LOVED Christmas and giving to other's!!!
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jamieoreilly

~I love you, Sweetheart. I love you, my Brycie Boy...~

"I pray that Chist will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in Him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love really is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now glory be to God! By His mighty power at work within us, He is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope." Ephesians 3:17-20

With Huge Continuous Faith~

~Tim~ & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Thursday, December 18, 2008 3:16 PM CST

"I press on toward the goal to win the prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward." Philippians 3:14

I am back and wanted to be here a lot sooner than this. It's been busy but sometimes busy is good. Like I always say, we have good days and not-so-good days. It's the whole roller-coaster-ride effect of grief. God never said it would be easy but He did say He would never leave our sides...and He never has. Thank goodness for His faithfulness.

My first, and most important, update is on our little friend, Jackson Schneider. He has been fighting Neuroblastoma since June of '06. I will never forget the first time I met him and his wonderful mom, MariClair, at the PITC. I was drawn to them...which is the same story as of all of these other wonderful CB families that we have come to know and love. It's all God's work... He places the people in your path and gives you a strong nudge. Have you felt that nudge??? Go with it... It's part of His "assignment" to us as His servants on earth. It's part of our purpose to glorify Him... What a great feeling... Jackson is one of my favorite little people that I have met in my lifetime. And now, he reignites the fuel within to fight his battle even harder than before as he has relapsed once again, this time in his bone marrow. It is a very scary and unknown time in Tim and MariClair's lives. "Please, Lord...please heal Jackson's little body. Free him from this wretched disease called cancer. Give him strength, healing, peace, and trust in You. Fill him even more with the amazing courage that You have already instilled in his spirit. You always send these little people so equipped. I thank you for that. Give his parents strength and wisdom to continue on in the battle with their precious son. Help them to trust in You and Your plan. Give his sister's, Hannah and Hilary, the courage and wisdom to do what is needed in their family. And, as always, Lord, let Your will be done." Here is Jackson's CB page: www.caringbridge.org/visit/jacksonschneider

I also continue to ask for powerful prayers for Isaac Hall, another one of our favorite little people, who fights his battle so courageously. He is on the roller coaster ride, too. And, it's so not enjoyable. Please continue prayers of strength and healing for him and his family. His CB page is: www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaachall

I also ask you to lift up Lisa (a wonderful wife and woman) and Amy (a wonderful wife, woman, and mom to two small children) who continue their battles with cancer. Neither outcome is good, and they need strength from our prayers. Lisa's CB page is www.caringbridge.org/visit/lisaholter. Amy's page is www.caringbridge.org/visit/amytaylor.

Please continue your prayers for the O'Reilly family as they move forward into the Christmas season without Jamie. It was her favorite time of year...
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jamieoreilly

We love and appreciate you all!!! I need to get to wrestling practice, now. We are having so much fun with the wrestling season! Mitchell has been doing awesome! His Dad and brother are so proud, I'm sure. Logan and Joel wrestle tonight, too. I can't believe it has been 5 months tomorrow since Tim went to heaven. It will be 22 months on the 22nd since Bryce's passing... Life continues on... Sending big, grateful, heart-warming hugs to you all!!!

~I love you, Sweetheart. I love you, my Brycie Boy...~

"I pray that Chist will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in Him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love really is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now glory be to God! By His mighty power at work within us, He is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope." Ephesians 3:17-20

With Huge Continuous Faith~

~Tim~ & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Wednesday, November 26, 2008 9:50 AM CST

"I press on toward the goal to win the prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward." Philippians 3:14

Great Father in heaven,
I praise You in all Your glory. You have blessed me beyond anything I have ever imagined. I would have NOTHING without You. This morning, I sit at Your feet with my requests for the incredible and inspiring life of Isaac Hall. Father, I know that You have plans and a purpose for each one of us in this beautiful, and broken, world. I want Your will to be done... On this beautiful morning, I lift up in prayer Isaac and the healing of his precious, young body. I ask You, Lord, to continue to give him life on this earth... You know that I don't want to see another family have to go through what we have on this journey. You know, Lord, that I am sooooo very grateful for my spiritual growth on this journey. I would NEVER exchange it! It's the future-pain that I want this wonderful family to avoid, even though I know that You are REFINING US THROUGH THE FIRE--thank You for molding us into who You created us to be. The Hall family has experienced so much pain and suffering already. So, Father, with my requests before You, I thank You for listening. I thank You for ALWAYS standing by our sides and never leaving us. I thank You for the times when You are silent and the times when Your words are loud and clear. Pour Your almighty strength into Isaac's small body, into his parents hearts, and into the hearts of his brother and sister and extended families. I pray that their FAITH will remain strong and that they will continue to trust in You. And Lord, as always, YOU WILL GET ALL THE GLORY, no matter what the outcome is... Our lives are in Your hands. In Jesus' precious name, Amen.

PLEASE GO TO ISAAC'S CB PAGE AND LEAVE A MESSAGE AND A PRAYER TODAY!!! www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaachall I know their pain. I feel their pain. I understand their pain. I wish I could take it all away... I pray that Tim and my Brycie Boy are also bringing Isaac comfort as he rests in the ICU. My mind has been joyful with my memories of my husband and son on our favorite cooking holiday. I will hold those memories close to my heart forever and share them with everyone. I described it in an email to a friend. I will share that in the next paragraph. Please continue to PRAISE GOD for all of the many blessings in your lives. Give thanks to God all day long for the rest of your life. Stop and smell the fresh, crisp air. Smile to God, and smile to others. Hold your kids more, love your spouse more, and keep God at the CENTER OF YOUR LIFE... Life is just so precious. You never know what your future holds but I do know that I trust in God's plan for my life. I pray for you to feel Jesus' PEACE & PRESENCE in your lives today and always... With all the love and gratitude in my heart to all of our supporters and comforters... I wish I could hug you all. HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO YOU.

"I too am excited for Thanksgiving. I am not sure if I told you or not but it was me and Tim's favorite holiday... We loved to cook together in the kitchen... We were really good together. We made a mouthwatering, magnificent meal, if I must say so myself! We would get up at 5:30 to season the turkey--he would hold the big thing, rotating it around, while I seasoned it. Then, we would mix up our homemade stuffing and stuff the turkey. And, all day long we would call everyone, including each other, "turkeys". We would take turns basting the bird and watching it to make sure we didn't overcook it. He, of course, would have to transfer the heavy thing with all those muscles!!! Loved it!--me, of course. Then, he would cut it up very carefully and skillfully. We would all try to snitch and he would say, "Get your own!" (jokingly). It was a very happy day. My family comes over on Thanksgiving. Bryce LOVED Thanksgiving because he LOVED to cook and eat!!! So, that in itself is very emotional for me too. It's that word, again...bittersweet.... I have asked my mom to come over night on Wednesday. She is excited. Tim LOVED teasing her!!!!!!!! She loved it!!! I always had to remind her that she gave birth to me, not him!! They were awesome together too. Wow... I can't believe he's gone... Sorry, today has been a very good day. I am embracing it... I'm just getting a little emotional now... I am so thankful for my life....so thankful... I have been blessed beyond imagination... God is good. You are a blessing too. And now, I'm realizing that I may just copy and paste this paragraph into Bryce's CB page because I wanted to update anyway. Hope you don't mind. All of my feelings and emotions are here...why try to re-write them?! That takes time and I haven't got a lot of that!"...

Please continue your prayers for these wonderful people that God has placed in our path... They are such a blessing in our lives.
www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaachall
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jamieoreilly
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jacksonschneider

~I love you, Sweetheart. I love you, my Brycie Boy...~

From Week 9 of my Hope Devotional:
"I pray that Chist will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in Him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love really is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now glory be to God! By His mighty power at work within us, He is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope." Ephesians 3:17-20

From week 8 of my Hope Devotional book (Thanks, Ree):
"To me, living is for Christ, and dying is even better. Yet if I live, that means fruitful service for Christ. I really don't know which is better. I'm torn between two desires: Sometimes I want to live, and sometimes I long to go and be with Christ. That would be far better for me, but it is better for you that I live." Philippians 1:21-24

With Huge Continuous Faith~

~Tim~ & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Wednesday, November 19, 2008 7:26 AM CST

"I press on toward the goal to win the prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward." Philippians 3:14

HAPPY 14th BIRTHDAY, Mitchell!!! I simply cannot even believe it!!! Our first-born is 14 years old! That's just plain crazy... Where do I start??? You are a shining example of God's love and Him being at work in our lives. You have that same quiet, strength as your Dad... I love it. And, I'm so very proud of you. You have your Dad's number-crunching ability as the 2nd Walking Calculator of our family. You do look so much like my brothers, though. I still laugh at how Logan worded it that day in the car, "Mitchell, you are so lucky. You got Dad's mathmatic skills and all I got was his looks!" I wouldn't complain about that if I was Logan...right Mitch?! I have to say again, you "broke us into parenthood"... We were blind. It's so funny to think back. You came 3 weeks early, and we forgot to call and tell anyone until 2 hours after you were born. You have brought us so much joy, Mitch. And now, you are such a leader in our family. You always have been. I have loved watching you grow up and mature. You've matured so quickly with everything you have endured through Bryce's battle to your Dad's passing. You were Bryce's hero, Mitch. He soooo appreciated you being his donor. That brought him so much comfort. You are such an amazing individual and so unique and yet, you are still so much like your Dad. Again, I love it. You are a lot of the "glue" in our family. I, and your Dad, couldn't be more proud. You are a faithful servant. I love watching your life unfold from the palm of God's hands... Have a wonderful day.

The emotional roller coaster ride continues... "Trust in the Lord"... Sometimes, I still just do not know what to say. I'm trying to remember to accept this huge blow to our lives but I find myself still shaking my head in disbelief. Thank goodness, God is constantly by our sides holding us up, giving us strength and HOPE... More later. I gotta keep the boys moving for school.

Please continue your prayers for these wonderful people that God has placed in our path... They are such a blessing in our lives.
www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaachall
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jamieoreilly
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jacksonschneider

~I love you, Sweetheart. I love you, my Brycie Boy...~

From Week 9 of my Hope Devotional:
"I pray that Chist will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in Him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love really is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now glory be to God! By His mighty power at work within us, He is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope." Ephesians 3:17-20

From week 8 of my Hope Devotional book (Thanks, Ree):
"To me, living is for Christ, and dying is even better. Yet if I live, that means fruitful service for Christ. I really don't know which is better. I'm torn between two desires: Sometimes I want to live, and sometimes I long to go and be with Christ. That would be far better for me, but it is better for you that I live." Philippians 1:21-24

With Huge Continuous Faith~

~Tim~ & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Monday, November 3, 2008 1:25 PM CST

"I press on toward the goal to win the prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward." Philippians 3:14

HAPPY 12th BIRTHDAY, LOGAN TIMOTHY!!! Wow... 12 years already... Where does the time go??? I remember the day you were born. It was such a beautiful fall day...looking out the hospital window. We went in during the night. I remember waking your dad around 1am. He looked at me and said, "You don't look like your in a lot of pain. It must not be time." and then, rolled back over to go to sleep. You don't say that to a woman in labor, right ladies?! We've laughed about it since (but it took a few days for me). haha. Logan, you have thrown us for a loop since the day you were born. You are my spirited child. I love you for that! You were so adorable with your head full of hair! You looked like we placed a wig on your head, it was so much hair! You were breech which surprised us all. When the doctor was checking you over after you arrived, and dad was running the video camera, you grabbed the doctor's stethoscope and held on for dear life with your left hand. He finally pryed your fingers away when suddenly your right hand swung up and grabbed the stethoscope with all your might! Again, he had to pry your fingers away. There was the beginning proof that we've shown you that you are our spirited child...and you've shown us much more since. You are the image of your father... I truly LOVE that!!! You have his looks, his humor, and his quick wit. You have such intelligence, like your father. You also have his soft, tender, loving heart...and, many times, stubborn mind. All of these things, I truly love... Yes, we called you "Destructo" as you grew, but you are also my "Little Timmy" that I wished for for so long... I passionately look forward to continue to watch you grow in so many ways. You have such awesome spiritual insight, and you are so gifted with words... You never cease to amaze me with your comments. I am so proud of you, Logan. Your dad and brother's are too... Always, always, always remember how much your dad loves you with all his heart, Bryce too. Thank you for being exactly who God created you to be...remember to ask Him to reveal His purpose for you. I love you forever, Logan...

Well, we are at yet another first. I hope Logan has such a good day... The morning went so fast that we didn't get to woop it up as much as I would have liked to for Logan. We are going out for his birthday supper, he just wasn't sure where yet. We've had a fun weekend with Jordan and Collin here with us--my sister Julie's kids. It's been great. I don't have much to say today. Lots of mixed emotions, most are bittersweet... I never knew what that word truly meant until Bryce passed away. Now, I get it. Prayers of strength. God will provide. There is HOPE for our future with God as our strength and Jesus as our Savior. Thank you, God, for the life You have given me and for all the people you have placed in my life and my boys' lives. Please forgive me that I haven't emailed you (many people) back, yet. It's hard to find the time. It is on my To Do List, though. My prayers are for all of you, too. Seek the Lord with all your heart. Lean not on your own understanding in life. Give Him all the control and totally, and completely, trust in Him... Where would we be without Him?... Our love and gratitude to all of you.

Please continue your prayers for these wonderful people that God has placed in our path... They are such a blessing in our lives.
www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaachall
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jamieoreilly
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jacksonschneider

~I love you, Sweetheart. I love you, my Brycie Boy...~

From Week 9 of my Hope Devotional:
"I pray that Chist will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in Him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love really is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now glory be to God! By His mighty power at work within us, He is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope." Ephesians 3:17-20

From week 8 of my Hope Devotional book (Thanks, Ree):
"To me, living is for Christ, and dying is even better. Yet if I live, that means fruitful service for Christ. I really don't know which is better. I'm torn between two desires: Sometimes I want to live, and sometimes I long to go and be with Christ. That would be far better for me, but it is better for you that I live." Philippians 1:21-24

With Huge Continuous Faith~

~Tim~ & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Friday, October 24, 2008 6:40 AM CDT

"I press on toward the goal to win the prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward." Philippians 3:14

HAPPY 5th BIRTHDAY, ETHAN ALEXANDER!!! We love you so very much, Sweetie Pie, Googlie Bear, Smoochie Poo! You have been counting down your birthday for 2 weeks! You were so excited for it that you woke up at 5:50 this morning!!! You have been such a wonderful blessing to our family. As I always say, you have brought us so much joy as such difficult times. Remember, we told everyone we were pregnant with you the day before Bryce was diagnosed... The day you were born, Bryce climbed into my hospital bed and shed his gorgeous red hair all over me and my jammies. Talk about ups and downs, you've been there the whole time... You were a huge part of God's plan. Thank you, God. I pray that Daddy and Brycie Boy send you signs today, E. You have "the faith of a child", and I'm so proud of you for that. You have such a loving and compassionate heart with so much spunk and fiestyness. Gotta love it! I remember everything about the day you were born. I remember me and Daddy's conversation on the way into the hospital...precious. I love you, Sweetie.

Two things that I forgot to mention about my Ethan conversations in my Tuesday update: Later that day, Ethan asked me, "Mom, when am I going to get to go to heaven?" I told him, "When God says it's your turn." He said, "I want to go now...to be with my Dad." I told him that "I believe God has big plans for you on this earth. And, while you are here, you need to listen to God and hear and see what He wants you to do for Him. It could be a smile for someone or a much bigger job. But, God has something planned so we must be patient and wait on Him." He was ok with that.

Another day, the week before, Ethan and I were driving home from dropping the kids off at school. And, out of the blue, he said to me, "Mom, you should play and have fun sometime, then you will forget about Dad." I said, "I'm not sure if I understand. Can you repeat that?" He said with a frustrated sigh, "Oh, never mind." I said, "Do you mean that I should play and have fun, then I will forget that Dad is gone?" He said, "Yeah, that's what I do and it really works! (Big pause) But you never REALLY forget it always..." Oh, to be a child again... Now, I must get my boys moving for school. Ethan has requested his birthday meal be at Applebee's tonight. His party is on Sunday. Say many prayers, this too is a "first" for him/us and is always hard... God bless you all.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008 12:56 PM CDT
Yep... It's been 3 months now without my wonderful husband and my boys' incredible father... It's been 3 weeks since Jamie has passed away, and 3 is Bryce's number...hhmmm. It will be 20 months tomorrow since Bryce went to heaven. The clock just keeps ticking. Time doesn't stop, even if it feels like your life has somewhat stopped.... So, Ethan and I were in my bedroom this morning and I noticed he tried hugging my leg. I thought nothing of it. Then, he said, "Mom, did you know that I always hugged my Daddy's leg like that?" I said, "That's right. I had forgotten. Do you want to hug my leg like you would Daddy's?" He said with a somber face, "No. It's not the same..." I agreed. It never would be the same... Then, we went downstairs to eat breakfast. Ethan ate his breakfast and told me he was bored. I told him that I didn't really like that word because it sounded like he wasn't very grateful for all that he had. I said, "Maybe instead you could say, I'm not sure what to do today." He turned to me and said, "It's just that it's not so much fun on the farm without my Daddy." I said, "I know. I feel the same way. If Daddy was here, he would have gotten up 3 times during the night to check the corn dryer. Then, he would have come in around 7am and put his cold hands up our backs and around to our tummies to give us a chill and hear us squeal." Ethan laughed a true belly-laugh and agreed. "Then," I said, "you would have climbed into his lap to try and eat his cereal. He would have said, "Get your own!" (jokingly, of course). Again, Ethan had a true belly-laugh. Ethan said, "Mom, remember Dad always sat here to eat his cereal?" with a tear coming from his eye... As I wiped away his tear, I said, "I remember now. I wish I had taken a picture of you sitting on his lap eating his cereal with him..."

Take pictures, people. Store those memories in your heart and mind. I hope and pray that my memories of my husband and son will be with me forever...but there is no guarentee. My memory is not the best... But, I do trust that God will provide those memories when I need them most. He will sustain. He is refining me through the fire... How is He working in your life these days??? Have you noticed or acknowledged Him and His actions?

Me and Tim's stone was delivered to the cememtery about 4 weeks ago. It is beautiful. I believe it is just as Tim would have wanted it. We have a scene of our farm on it. It's amazing... He was such a farmer. It also has our wedding scripture, 1 Corinthians 13:13. It has a Case IH tractor that Mitchell picked out and the same cross with praying hands as Bryce's.

I wanted one for Tim and I both to tie in with Bryce's (tractor and cross). Of course, Bryce's tractor is a John Deere

It had to be... Tim said to me 2 weeks before he passed away that the only thing he regretted about Bryce's stone was that we did not put "Son of Tim and Susie Breuer". I told him it would be ok because on our stone we would have "Parents of Mitchell, Logan, Bryce (1998-2007), Joel & Ethan". He sighed and said, "Oh, good." So, of course, that is also on our stone. The shape is perfect, the color is jet black. I am sure he is very pleased with it. I thought about putting his picture on it but then, very specifically, heard him tell me (loud and clear!) "Don't put my picture on it!" I turned to Mitchell and told him and he replied with, "Oh yah, Mom. Dad wouldn't want his picture on it!" We had to laugh. The other giggle was that Tim always had to announce, and remind me, that I was so much "older" than him... Less than 4 months!!!! But yes, I was older. So, I figure now he can always say that I am older than him....hhhmmmmm. Anyway, my point being, the stone is beautiful. I love it!

Almost 2 weeks ago, I was driving to my Mom's In Touch prayer group in Goodhue. I was thinking as I was driving, and what I am about to tell you all happended within about 5-10 seconds so try to stay with me... I was thinking about... "Who would be there? Monica. She and Brandon have a beautiful marriage. I miss you, Honey. Why isn't the radio on??? (Turned it on) Why is it on KQ??? (Tim's station--personal joke between the 2 of us). (DJ announces:) We have a request for "Roxanne".......... My jaw dropped!!! Tim came in many mornings singing very loudly in his silly voice, "ROXANNE!" I don't know why... It was just his silly song. He was so funny. The boys' heads would immediately turn to him with huge smiles! "Dad's home!" It also meant he was in a great mood... We love those memories. I miss you, honey.

On October 5, we went to watch Auntie Manda run the Twins Cities Marathon. The day started out sad for me. I missed my husband and son so very much. I told the boys' that I wanted to hear some Toby Mac--"Lose My Soul". I even said, "Honey, would you play that for me please?!" The boys heard me say that. I waited and waited as I drove. I turned the radio up many times to see if it was on. Nothing. We got to the marathon and saw Amanda at the first location. We got back into the car to go to the next mile marker location in the plan. We were almost there when I asked the boys', "Guys, do you tell your Dad and brother how much you love them?" Logan replied, "Mom, from where they are, they already know that we love them!" I said, "Well, I still say it out loud. I love you, Honey. I love you, Brycer!" Before I finished saying it, "Lose My Soul" starts playing on the radio!!! Love it, love it, love it! Thanks, Honey!!!

There's another song that I just love these days and it's by Jeremy Camp who sings the song "Walk By Faith" that Bryce had once said "that's my song because I will never give up and I will always keep fighting". So, Jeremy's new song is "There Will Be a Day". The words are outstanding... That song brings me so much HOPE. I will add the words after this paragraph. Here is the link to the song so you can hear it: http://musicremedy.com/j/Jeremy_Camp/videos/There_Will_Be_A_Day-26789.html
I just looked it up in the Bible and I believe I found it in Revelation 21:4-5 which (I just realized) was read at Jamie's funeral...(Revelation 21:2-7 was actually read) Wow..........
***************************************
I try to hold on to this world with everything I have
But I feel the weight of what it brings, and the hurt that trys to grab
The many trials that seem to never end, His word declares this truth,
that we will enter in this rest with wonders anew

But I hold on to this hope and the promise that He brings
That there will be a place with no more suffering

There will be a day with no more tears, no more pain, and no more fears
There will be a day when the burdens of this place, will be no more, we�ll see Jesus face to face
But until that day, we�ll hold on to you always

I know the journey seems so long
You feel your walking on your own
But there has never been a step
Where you�ve walked out all alone

Troubled soul don�t lose your heart
Cause joy and peace he brings
And the beauty that�s in store
Outweighs the hurt of life�s sting

But I hold on to this hope and the promise that He brings
That there will be a place with no more suffering

There will be a day with no more tears, no more pain, and no more fears
There will be a day when the burdens of this place, will be no more, we�ll see Jesus face to face
But until that day, we�ll hold on to you always

I can�t wait until that day where the very one I�ve lived for always will wipe away the sorrow that I�ve faced
To touch the scars that rescued me from a life of shame and misery this is why, this is why I sing�.

There will be a day with no more tears, no more pain, and no more fears
There will be a day when the burdens of this place, will be no more, we�ll see Jesus face to face

There will be a day with no more tears, no more pain, and no more fears
There will be a day when the burdens of this place, will be no more, we�ll see Jesus face to face

There will be a day, He�ll wipe away the stains, He�ll wipe away the tears, He�ll wipe away the tears�..there will be a day.
***************************************

Our friend, Isaac Hall, is doing very well with every thing that is going on inside his young body. You must pray fervently for him. His situation is very similar to Bryce's. His spunk and spirit is incredible! He is one amazing young boy. It is an honor to know him and his family and to call them friends. My devotions reminded me this morning that we must pray 'for God's will to be done'. As difficult as life can be, God's will must have priority over our's... We all have our wants and needs. We all (usually) want all the control in our lives. It's our human nature. But, as I always say and truly believe, God's plan is far more perfect than our's. The 'if onlys' creep into our minds everyday, I'm just as preoccupied by the 'if onlys' as everyone else. We wish we could know what the future holds... We want to know that we are going to be ok and that life is going to be fairly easy or at least, that we will survive all the struggles in life. But truly, it's in the trials and adversities of life that we face that make our trust in the Lord's plan stronger--if we choose to take that path... Pray for Isaac and his parents strength, peace, and trust in the Lord. They are amazing people with huge faith. I wish you could all know them. Please keep the prayers coming for the O'Reilly's as they continue to travel the road to their "new normal". They are hangin' in there. They have so many great people surrounding them with love and support. God provides it all...thank goodness. And lastly, continue to the prayers for Jackson as he continues his treatment plan out in New York. He did awesome before and after his surgery. His parents are a great team. That little guy brings a smile to everyone's face! Once again, I must say, that God has sent each one of these people, and their families, "equipped". Do not let up on the prayers!!! We love and appreciate you all so very much!!!
www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaachall
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jamieoreilly
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jacksonschneider

~I love you, Sweetheart. I love you, my Brycie Boy...~

From Week 9 of my Hope Devotional:
"I pray that Chist will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in Him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love really is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now glory be to God! By His mighty power at work within us, He is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope." Ephesians 3:17-20

From week 8 of my Hope Devotional book (Thanks, Ree):
"To me, living is for Christ, and dying is even better. Yet if I live, that means fruitful service for Christ. I really don't know which is better. I'm torn between two desires: Sometimes I want to live, and sometimes I long to go and be with Christ. That would be far better for me, but it is better for you that I live." Philippians 1:21-24

With Huge Continuous Faith~

~Tim~ & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Tuesday, October 7, 2008 8:50 PM CDT
"I press on toward the goal to win the prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward." Philippians 3:14

Just unimaginable sadness and devastating loneliness today and tonight and the last few days. Missing my devoted husband terribly and my faith-filled son... I can't believe there once was 7 in our family and now there are 5... I believe that reality is setting in. Somedays I wonder how many years will I feel this emptiness and loneliness without him/them? And, then I hear "God will provide." Enough said... Jesus IS enough.

I truly believe that Jamie is hanging out with Tim and Bryce. I'm sure they are all enjoying the sights of heaven. Tim Honey, thanks for the signs on Sunday. I love you, both, with my whole, entire being. You both were also more than enough. God has blessed me more than I ever imagined. I'm just trying to get through the days with a clear head and a focus on the Lord. I miss our private talks. I miss our love. I miss your voice. I miss your strong touch. I miss you consoling me. I miss your protection over me and our boys. Believe it or not, I even miss your snoring. I can't believe your gone,...too. As you know, I have started the Grief Share group again, last night. I'm always asking God for His strength and guidance... His is way more powerful than mine.

Please keep praying for the O'Reilly's. Zach, their boys, her mom, their family's and all of her many friends miss Jamie so very much... Her services were beautiful beyond belief. It still does not seem real. Powerful prayers, please! We all love you so much, Jamie... Also keep praying for Isaac Hall (who is so much like Bryce in so many ways) and Jackson Schneider. There are so many people who need to be lifted up in prayer. Please keep the prayers coming for our family, too. God loves all of our prayer requests. The more, the merrier! He CAN handle it all!
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jamieoreilly
www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaachall
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jacksonschneider

~I love you, Sweetheart. I love you, my Brycie Boy...~

From Week 9 of my Hope Devotional:
"I pray that Chist will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in Him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love really is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now glory be to God! By His mighty power at work within us, He is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope." Ephesians 3:17-20

From week 8 of my Hope Devotional book (Thanks, Ree):
"To me, living is for Christ, and dying is even better. Yet if I live, that means fruitful service for Christ. I really don't know which is better. I'm torn between two desires: Sometimes I want to live, and sometimes I long to go and be with Christ. That would be far better for me, but it is better for you that I live." Philippians 1:21-24

With Huge Continuous Faith~

~Tim~ & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Tuesday, September 30, 2008 9:43 PM CDT
"I press on toward the goal to win the prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward." Philippians 3:14

As many of you already know, our friend Jamie passed away yesterday morning. We all love and miss you, Jamie! Tomorrow her family will begin sharing and celebrating her life at our same church that Tim and Bryce were last celebrated for their lives on this earth. She, Tim, and Bryce are the fortunate one's. They have received the ultimate reward... When death occurs so close to your heart, you manage to lose your fear of dying...at least most of us do, I believe. These are busy days of planning for Zach and the boys, and Renee. Thank you for your love and support to this awesome family. They appreciate every prayer, every message, every gesture. Please do not let up on the prayers. They need these powerful prayers more than ever. Jamie no longer feels pain... She no longer wonders "what if"... Where she is now, there is only amazing love...more than she ever imagined there could be... Before she went to heaven, I asked her to hug my wonderful husband and son for me and tell them how much I/we love them... I just wish there wasn't so much pain left behind in their trail of dust to heaven... Prayers, prayers, and more prayers please.

Also, our friend, Isaac Hall, from Nebraska (whom we love so very much, too!!!) had lab appts today where they discovered blast cells. He will have a bone marrow biopsy and spinal tap tomorrow morning. Please send many, many powerful prayers for Isaac and his healing. His page is www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaachall. And, our friend, Jackson, arrived in NYC today. He has checked in with his mom at the RMH. He will be there for almost a month for treatments for recurring Neuroblastoma. His page is www.caringbridge.org/visit/jacksonschneider. Pray for tremendous strength from God alone for their families. Pray for their trust in God's presence in their lives, now more than ever. We will always be here cheering you on, guys. We love you, Isaac and Jackson!

We send our gratitude to all of you for your continued support and love for our family and many other families. Everyday, we press on with unwavering faith. Everyday, we deal with our pain and look UP for guidance. Everyday, we shed tears--some silent, some not so much. Everyday brings us one day closer to seeing our loved one's again...and seeing Jesus face to face... Embrace TODAY with your whole heart! It's a gift from God...

~I love you, Sweetheart. I love you, my Brycie Boy...~

From Week 9 of my Hope Devotional:
"I pray that Chist will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in Him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love really is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now glory be to God! By His mighty power at work within us, He is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope." Ephesians 3:17-20

From week 8 of my Hope Devotional book (Thanks, Ree):
"To me, living is for Christ, and dying is even better. Yet if I live, that means fruitful service for Christ. I really don't know which is better. I'm torn between two desires: Sometimes I want to live, and sometimes I long to go and be with Christ. That would be far better for me, but it is better for you that I live." Philippians 1:21-24

With Huge Continuous Faith~

~Tim~ & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Saturday, September 27, 2008 10:03 PM CDT
~~~September is Childhood Cancer Awareness Month~~~
**Please say many, many prayers for the CHILDREN. It's such a horrible and helpless feeling to know that everyday more and more children are being diagnosed with cancer, and more and more everyday children are dying from cancer never able to fulfill their DREAMS... Hearts are broken and empty and lonely. It's a pain that is unexplainable and unbearable. I would never wish it upon anyone!**
___________________________________________________________

"I press on toward the goal to win the prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward." Philippians 3:14

Here I sit again not knowing what to say... It's been 10 weeks today since my incredible husband, the boys' amazing father, went to be with the Lord. Our family is pressing on just as ~Tim and Bryce~ would want us to. We continue to make visits with Jamie and her family. Our hearts continue to break for them. We understand their pain all too well...with losing the battle with cancer--my Brycer--and losing your spouse and parent...both. Now I know how all of you feel/have felt when you always wish/wished there was "something more!" that you could do for our family. Many of you have told me that you feel/have felt "helpless"... I totally get that now... The pain is agonizing. I wish so badly that I could take all of this awful cancer out of this world! I wish that all of the pain and suffering in this world would be gone. I wish so many things... I choose not to ask God "why?" anymore, I made that decision a long time ago. I feel good about that decision. I will continue to be patient and wait to find out all of these unknown answers when I reach heavens gates. Until then, I will wait upon the Lord. I trust in Him. I lean on Him. I give it all to Him. I look to Him and not anywhere else. He gives me HOPE for our future... And, I do know that in these times of trial and tribulation, He is EVER-PRESENT. He is our rock and salvation. He is faithful and steadfast. His grace and mercy will shine through and through. In these times of trouble and sorrow, He is strengthening us. He is refining us through the fire. I know that our family will survive through our suffering and sadness. It's just really stinking, really bad... I know that Jamie's family will survive this, too. Breathe in. Breathe out... I just wish so badly that they did not have to go through it at all. Thank you to all of the CB families who are lifting the O'Reilly's up in prayer on their CB pages! Thank you to EVERYONE who is praying for Zach & Jamie and their 5 incredible boys. Thank you for the prayers and messages and food for our family. God has given you all such hearts of compassion... Your words and gifts of love are so amazing... Thank you. Please continue to pray for Jamie, Zach and their boys, Renee, and their extended family's. God's love is surrounding their home and bringing some comfort. Her CB page is www.caringbridge.org/visit/jamieoreilly. Thank you...

Please also lift up all of our CB families who continue to fight and who continue to grieve. Please lift up in powerful prayer our friends, Tonya and Dave and Tessa. Big Girl (Noelle) had her heavenly birthday yesterday. It was Saturday (a year ago today) that she saw Jesus face to face and met ~Bryce~ for the first time. I understand their pain, loneliness, and emptiness for their child/sibling. I wish I could be there (in WI) to give Tonya lots of hugs. Their page is www.caringbridge.org/wi/noelle. I know that they would love to hear from you. Also, our buddy, Jackson, from Plainview leaves for New York for his treatments next week! This is a scary and unknown time for them. We will be lifting you up in prayers, Jackson and Family! His CB page is www.caringbridge.org/visit/jacksonschneider. I just love that little guy!!! I know that they would also love to hear from you. God has blessed us with so many wonderful people in our lives...

So, after saying that I didn't know what to say, now I do... I have learned to live for TODAY. I have also learned that we grow (with God) in the valleys, and we rejoice (with God) on the mountain tops... If we so choose... I try really hard to keep my FOCUS not on the tragedies in life but to FOCUS on God's promises and God's purpose in our lives. It gives me a better view in my life and in my daily focus. Everyday I thank God for His unending strength that He shares with me and my boys. And, everyday I thank Him for all of the more-than-imagined blessings in my life. And, as always, God gets all the glory... Just as it should be... We love and appreciate you all.

~I love you, Sweetheart. I love you, my Brycie Boy...~

From Week 9 of my Hope Devotional:
"I pray that Chist will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in Him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love really is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now glory be to God! By His mighty power at work within us, He is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope." Ephesians 3:17-20

From week 8 of my Hope Devotional book (Thanks, Ree):
"To me, living is for Christ, and dying is even better. Yet if I live, that means fruitful service for Christ. I really don't know which is better. I'm torn between two desires: Sometimes I want to live, and sometimes I long to go and be with Christ. That would be far better for me, but it is better for you that I live." Philippians 1:21-24

With Huge Continuous Faith~

~Tim~ & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Tuesday, September 23, 2008 1:33 PM CDT
A Special Walk for Children�s Cancer Research Fund
8th Annual Emma's Hope Walk
Saturday, September 27, 2008
Pepin Area Schools
Pepin, Wisconsin
Rally will begin at 10:00 a.m.
All proceeds go directly to CCRF

CCRF Mission Statement:
CCRF is dedicated to finding a cure for childhood cancer by providing funds to the University of Minnesota where research and training focuses on the prevention, treatment, and cure of childhood cancers, and to improving the quality of life of the pediatric childhood cancer patients and their families.
Thanks to the generous donations of our sponsors, Emma�s Hope will once again include a T-shirt for all walkers and volunteers, prizes, and refreshments for everyone. Thanks to you, Emma�s Hope has raised over $100,000 for CCRF! We sincerely hope you will be able to join us!

Emma's Hope will once again have an incredible silent auction--gift certificates, hotel packages, artwork and much, much more. Start planning for Christmas now! If you are interested in donating items to the silent auction, please call Angie Laehn at 715-442-5700 or email her at aliemma@hotmail.com.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
**Please say many, many prayers for the CHILDREN. September is Childhood Cancer Awareness Month. It's such a horrible and helpless feeling to know that everyday more and more children are being diagnosed with cancer, and more and more everyday children are dying from cancer never able to fulfill their DREAMS... Hearts are broken and empty and lonely. It's a pain that is unexplainable and unbearable. I would never wish it upon anyone!**
___________________________________________________________

"I press on toward the goal to win the prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward." Philippians 3:14

From Week 9 of my Hope Devotional:
"I pray that Chist will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in Him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love really is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now glory be to God! By His mighty power at work within us, He is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope." Ephesians 3:17-20

I am sitting here in the quietness of Jamie and Zach's home. Jamie is so beautiful... Zach's love for her is beyond words. He and Renee, Jamie's mom, are living off the strength of the Lord. It is so obvious. She is such an amazing mother to her 5 boys... They couldn't wait for mommy to get home last night. Zach said yesterday that he is so uplifted with your prayers and messages you have been leaving in their guest book. Thank you. I know THAT feeling... Your guest book entries are far more powerful and uplifting than any of you will ever realize. Keep them coming! Jamie is in good hands. Besides her husband, she has wonderful friends who are nurses who love her so very much! Please continue to pray for Jamie, Zach and their boys, Renee, and their extended family's. God's love is surrounding this home and bringing comfort to all. Her CB page is www.caringbridge.org/visit/jamieoreilly. Thank you...

I'm not able to find many words today to share. My heart is breaking for this wonderful family. My boys' hearts are breaking for them... I can't help but wonder if Tim and Bryce have been "spending time" with Jamie... My trust in the Lord has not weakened. My faith will not falter. The Lord will prevail! The Lord will provide. May your faith be strong in the Lord... We love and appreciate you all. God blessings to you...

From week 8 of my Hope Devotional book (Thanks, Ree):

"To me, living is for Christ, and dying is even better. Yet if I live, that means fruitful service for Christ. I really don't know which is better. I'm torn between two desires: Sometimes I want to live, and sometimes I long to go and be with Christ. That would be far better for me, but it is better for you that I live." Philippians 1:21-24

With Huge Continuous Faith~

~Tim~ & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Tuesday, September 16, 2008 10:41 PM CDT
I added 2 important events:
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7th Annual Car Cruise for Camp Jornada brought to you by Majerus Garage

SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 20TH 2008
We would like the families of Camp Jornada to join us at Lark Toys in Kellogg, MN at 2:30pm. Camp Jornada kids will get free mini golfing and rides on the hand carved merry-go-round!

Lark Toys can be found along the scenic bluffs of the Mississippi River valley on Highway 61 in Kellogg, MN. Just turn off onto Co. Rd. 18 and make an immediate left on LARK Lane.

171 LARK Lane - Kellogg, MN 5594
Phone: 507.767.3387 - Fax: 507.767.4565
www.larktoys.com

ALL PROCEEDS DONTATED TO CAMP JORNADA!

For those of you with a super cool car... Register to join the full cruise too... Sign In at Majerus Garage-Lake City at 9:00 AM. Cruise will be departing at 10:00.
Destinations: Lake City Nursing Home, Leo�s in Mazeppa, Lucky 7 (Lunch available), BJ�s (Whipporwhil), Lark Toys

Door Prizes will be given at every stop and maps provided! Silent Auction. Any questions..please contact Stacey 507-358-0958. Also, please RSVP to Stacey by Friday for tickets.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A Special Walk for Children�s Cancer Research Fund
8th Annual Emma's Hope Walk
Saturday, September 27, 2008
Pepin Area Schools
Pepin, Wisconsin
Rally will begin at 10:00 a.m.
All proceeds go directly to CCRF

CCRF Mission Statement:
CCRF is dedicated to finding a cure for childhood cancer by providing funds to the University of Minnesota where research and training focuses on the prevention, treatment, and cure of childhood cancers, and to improving the quality of life of the pediatric childhood cancer patients and their families.
Thanks to the generous donations of our sponsors, Emma�s Hope will once again include a T-shirt for all walkers and volunteers, prizes, and refreshments for everyone. Thanks to you, Emma�s Hope has raised over $100,000 for CCRF! We sincerely hope you will be able to join us!

Emma's Hope will once again have an incredible silent auction--gift certificates, hotel packages, artwork and much, much more. Start planning for Christmas now! If you are interested in donating items to the silent auction, please call Angie Laehn at 715-442-5700 or email her at aliemma@hotmail.com.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
**Please say many, many prayers for the CHILDREN. September is Childhood Cancer Awareness Month. It's such a horrible and helpless feeling to know that everyday more and more children are being diagnosed with cancer, and more and more everyday children are dying from cancer never able to fulfill their DREAMS... Hearts are broken and empty and lonely. It's a pain that is unexplainable and unbearable. I would never wish it upon anyone!**

"Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that He may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you. Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings. And the God of all grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will Himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. To Him be the power for ever and ever. Amen." 1 Peter 5:6-11

This has been a very powerful passage to me today... Thank you, God. I hear (loud and clear) the words "humble, cast all your anxiety, self-controlled and alert, the enemy, standing firm in the faith, sufferings, grace, eternal glory, Christ, restore, strong, firm and steadfast, to Him be the power"... Too many times the enemy tries to step in and break us down... I won't allow it.

Jesus brings me peace. I live for today. What do we know anyway? Judgement Day could be tomorrow for all we know. What are we doing for God's purpose? What is our purpose that God created each one of us for? "For it is God who works in you to will and to act according to His good purpose." Philippians 2:13 Don't think too hard into it. God has probably already shown you, and shared with you, a few times. He is loving, patient, kind, and has so much understanding.

Tonight's message (which is from my heart, as always) is coming from many Bible scriptures that have impacted me tremendously. I apologize for the long delay in my updates... No excuses--there are too many in this world. When I have had time to write, I am not sure what to say... I've been praying for time and words for at least 3 weeks. So, I'm sorry. I know all of you care so very much for our family. We appreciate your COMPASSIONATE HEARTS!!! Tim and Bryce had such huge, soft, teddybear, compassionate hearts of gold. We miss them so much... Part of my heart hurts just from being so consumed in Tim's passing that my Brycer hasn't been thought of as much as he was...that's just being honest. This last week has been flowing with many more thoughts of my Brycer... What a lucky girl I am. God has blessed me more than I could have ever imagined possible. The day that Tim and I were married--May 22, 1993--was the happiest day of my life, then. I just couldn't imagine loving him more than that. God grew our love and respect for one another into such a true, deep meaningful, unselfish, passionate love... I am so happy to see so many couples in loving, happy marriages. Just live and love, respect and give, laugh and cry, and grow together... God is so good. And, by all means, DO NOT TAKE ANY CREDIT! Give God all the glory!!! I could never say that enough. God is so good...

The boys' are really enjoying being back in school. Mitchell, now in 8th grade, is maturing by leaps and bounds. He lets me share many "Dad stories" while we laugh and cry together. In fact, he told me one of his dad stories yesterday... He remembered that when we were in Hawaii in March, the Hawaiian (male) dancer had asked all the males in the group to come up on stage to learn a certain Hawaiian dance. Tim looked at his boys and said, "Come on, guys. This may be the only chance you get in your life." Wow....... Pretty amazing, isn't it?! The boys didn't go up to learn the dance but Tim did...And, he was awesome and loved it!!! Mitchell was one of his Dad's #1 fans...ME being the President of the club. When I hold a Mary Kay appointment, he holds down the fort without any help from the Grandma's because he wants to do it on his own, and he does it without any complaints. Praise God for the person He created Mitchell to be. He has been busy with football and wanting to be at more school activities. I couldn't help but feel sadness tonight while looking at the sidelines of his game and seeing many of the dad's there but not his dad... He's growing up so quickly. He has that laid-back, hard-working, quiet-strength personality, that is so much like his dad. Logan is also so much like his dad in the fact that he cracks "smart" jokes almost always. I remind him that I did not find his dad funny at all times, either...hhmmmm. He is in 6th grade (you know, the "King's of the Elementary") and enjoying flag football and managing the Goodhue Varsity Football Team with his buddy, Michael. He still never misses a Twin's game on the radio or (Sunday)TV. We had the pleasure of going to many Twins games this year, probably a handful with Tim, thank goodness. Joel is my (sometimes) quiet and (always) compassionate and spiritual son. He has drawn many pictures again since Tim passed away, like he did when Bryce passed away. He always has really great spiritual insight. He is now in 3rd grade and has a heart for others. His "3rd grade year" is bringing back many bittersweet memories of Bryce in his last year of school... Ethan started Preschool last week. He goes Tuesday and Thursday afternoons. The first question he asked when he got home the first day was, "When do I get to go all day?" He loves it! He has always had some separation anxiety (since Bryce's relapse in 2005) but has done really well with school so far. Yay! That makes it so much easier for me. He is almost always kissing me or hugging me, telling me how much he loves me, "Smoochie Poo and Googly Bear". He also reminds me of many Daddy memories. He has brought back memories of Hawaii, Tim's chips and jalepinos, to snuggling at bedtime. He will just suddenly start crying anywhere, at anytime, remembering that his Daddy has died and gone to heaven with "Brycie Boy". They all hurt inside so much. Why wouldn't they? Tim Breuer was the best dad chosen specifically for them! I always told Tim that he was the best dad in the whole world!!! God chooses, and plans, who would go where best, I believe. He chose us here in this home, and you in your homes. Trust in His plan... I am so grateful that they are all sensitive to my feelings and emotions, too. Our boys are all watching out for their mom, too. They bring me so much joy. I just want to bring them peace and joy, too. Most importantly, I want to teach them about the love of the Lord... "But seek FIRST His kingdom and His rightousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6:33-34.

So, with school starting and going so well, I just keep plugging away with our everyday needs. Ethan and I hang out at home most of the days, except for running our errands. Tim's parents have been wonderful about helping us out. His dad has a very-close-to-Tim brain to help me know what to do and where to go with whatever. I thank God for him helping me out since I don't have a "Tim Breuer Manual"...I wish I did! I always try to keep my husbands preferences in mind with all my love, respect, and honor to him. I try to keep a smile on my face for him. He was beyond great! I try to remember to prioritize what is most important; and that is time with God first to fill my cup, to praise Him and honor Him, to thank Him for the strength and blessings He gives me/us, to put in my requests for strength and guidance, to open my eyes and ears to Him, to soften my heart for Him, and to ask for forgiveness. There have been some really difficult moments in the past 8 1/2 weeks, to say the least. But, God always prevails! God always provides. And, God answers prayers! He is faithful and steadfast. He will NEVER leave our sides. I know and feel that with all my heart. We need to remember what we pray for in the Lord's Prayer: "Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven." God's will, not our's... "If you cling to your life, you will lose it; but if you give it up for me, you will find it." Matthew 10:39

One of my favorite songs right now is by Christian music artist, Toby Mac. It's called "Lose My Soul". The words are now and present in todays world. The words also come from a Bible verse (not sure where--sorry, still working on that!), but I just LOVE it when they do that!!! He sings: "I don't want gain the whole world and lose my soul." And, Mandisa sings: "How do I sense the tide is rising...Desensitizing me from living in the light of eternity?" Then, Toby sings: "We're relying on you, Lord. All eyes are on you." That is my favorite part of the song that ALWAYS makes me cry!!! "ALL EYES ARE ON YOU, LORD." Because I think of our family tragedies (and triumphs) and know that all eyes are on Him now. Everyone wants to see where He will lead us. And, personally, I want everyone watching him because I know, with my whole heart, that He will bring goodness from our tragedies... "As far as I am concerned, God turned into good what you meant for evil." Genesis 50:20 I pray that more and more people are turning to the Lord, everyday. That is what matters most. If anyone can get that song into the guestbook, I would sure appreciate it!

I just want to thank all of you for your continued support and prayers. We love and appreciate you all so very much, especially the many, powerful prayers! This is just the beginning of our "new normal" lives, again. Like I said earlier, I just try to focus on today. Our friend, Jamie, has been given sad, scary results again. Her cancer is back and its spreading quickly. I ask you for prayers for her healing, and for her and Zach to feel God's presence and hear His guidance. Pray for strength and peace for her, Zach and their 5 incredible boys, plus her family and his family. Pray for her to give God all of her worries, fears, burdens, and anxieties. "Worry about nothing. Pray about everything." Her CB page is www.caringbridge.org/visit/jamieoreilly. Thank you...

From week 8 of my Hope Devotional book (Thanks, Ree):

"To me, living is for Christ, and dying is even better. Yet if I live, that means fruitful service for Christ. I really don't know which is better. I'm torn between two desires: Sometimes I want to live, and sometimes I long to go and be with Christ. That would be far better for me, but it is better for you that I live." Philippians 1:21-24

With Huge Continuous Faith~

~Tim~ & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Friday, August 22, 2008 7:32 AM CDT
It's been 18 months since my Brycer took his last breath. The suffering he endured is still so fresh in my mind... I finally got to hold my son on my lap again that day. And now, he sits on his father's lap, and he sits on Jesus' lap... Wow. I can only imagine. The pain is still raw and gnawing at my heart. But, as I have said in my last entry... GOD WILL PROVIDE. He has gotten us this far out since Bryce passed away. He will continue to lead and guide us through the rest of our lives, through all the pain and loneliness, through the struggles and the victories...However long it may be until we meet again...

I love you, Bryce Andrew... I love you too, Sweetheart. You're my favorite. Give each other a hug and kiss from me... See ya, soon. Trusting always in God's plan.

Tuesday, August 19, 2008 10:12 PM CDT

From my devotions this morning...

Jesus said to them, My food is to do the will of Him who sent me and to accomplish and completely finish His work. John 4:34

Breathe in, breathe out.... It's been one month to date(it was 4 weeks ago last Saturday) since my favorite person in the whole world received his greatest reward ever imagined...Eternal Life in heaven. One month down...and the rest of our lives to go. This is why we must TRUST in the Lord... There is nothing that we can do to change this. We've been through this before... I'm still at a loss for words. My heart is broken for me, for my boys, for my 2nd parents (Tim's mom and dad) and sisters (Amanda and Shell), for my parents and sisters and brothers, for our close family and friends... Tim was so much more than a husband and father. He was the leader in our family. Tonight at prayers with my boys, I thanked God for the leader that he was and for the leader that Bryce was. Wow. How can one family be so blessed?!

One answer: It's all God's work... God blesses us, and in turn, we bless other's. He created every one of us, and we are all special in His eyes. He doesn't make mistakes. He sends us specially equipped knowing what we can do for the good of Him. Are you doing what He sent you to do? Read the scripture above again...

I know you are all still praying for us. I thank God for that, and for all of you, everyday!!! I've wanted to update for a while now but sometimes it's hard to know what to say. I do know, very strongly in my heart, that God will provide. He has been providing for our family for many years. God is faithful. He will never leave our side, and He will be the ONLY way that we will get through this! As sure as I sit here typing tonight, I know and feel so strongly that God is leading us and guiding us everyday. I can't help but look back and see God's hands all over everything in our lives. He is gradually placing all the pieces of our "life puzzles" into place making a big, huge, beautiful image. I have all the trust in my heart in God's plan. I just wish my heart didn't have to hurt so bad...again. I just wish my boys' hearts didn't have to hurt so bad...again. I am so glad that Bryce and Tim are together in heaven, as bad as I wish that they were here with us,...I am glad that they are TOGETHER. They have completed their work here on earth, now they are completing their heavenly deeds. We just keep going...breathing in-breathing out. Trying to adjust. Trying not to think too hard into the future. Not allowing myself to panick. God will provide. Fear is not the work of God. Anytime that I have doubts or fears, I try to remember to give them to God. I wish you would do the same. I hear people talk about their fears (about pretty much anything in life) and I think, "I'm glad that I rarely worry anymore." It's a waste of time to me, and time is precious. Giving God all the control gives me peace in my heart. Call me crazy, I don't really care. It's a peace I have, and I wish everyone would find...because it's there for everyone. It's God's promises. It's the resurrection of Jesus. It's provides me with HOPE. God refills my cup with His powerful strength, every morning and all day long. And, at night, I get on my knees and thank Him for getting me through another day. God will provide...

Chris (my younger brother), Gloria, Sean, and Trachell (Reginald comes on Thursday) are here from Hawaii. They got here last Thursday. We have been blessed with many smiles and laughs, lots of busy-ness, and some down-time with them. Tim's birthday celebration and bon fire was so much fun. I try to smile for my husband... He hated to see me sad about Bryce but ALWAYS understood and never tried to change me or argue with me. He cried with me. He laughed with me. He understood me and always listened. Now, I am trying to get used to keeping my very deep, inner thoughts to myself. These were the thoughts that I had that only he knew... I am trying to adjust to the thought of making "our" decisions (still together) with him, it's just that he will be providing answers from heaven (I hope because there is still so many decisions to make). I want to show Tim my respect for him, as my husband, my best friend, and father of our children, in so many ways. But, most importantly, God is still first in my life and always will be. I know that Tim and Bryce totally understand and want it that way. To Him be all the honor, praise and glory...

Please continue the prayers for my boys who are doing very well considering their circumstances. God sends us all with a purpose. We are trying to focus on what our purpose is for God. We know that Bryce and Tim/Dad will be waiting for us on the other side...

Until we meet again, Tim Honey and my Brycie Boy, I love you both with my whole heart forever and ever...

With Huge Continuous Faith~

~Tim~ & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Sunday, August 10, 2008 6:39 AM CDT
Cast your burden on the Lord, and He will sustain you. Psalms 55:22

'Tis said memories are golden
Well that maybe true.
But we never wanted memories
We only wanted you.

If tears could build a stairway
And heartaches make a lane,
We'd walk a path to heaven
And bring you home again.

Our family chain is broken
And nothing seems the same
But as God calls us one by one,
The chain will link again.

Good morning, Honey. Happy 38th birthday. I'm sure that you and Bryce have already started that glorious celebration that you have in heaven... When you hug today, make sure that you give each other many hugs from me, the brothers, your parents, my mom, your sister's, my brother's and sister's, the grandma's, and all of our family's and friends...that's a lot of hugs! Did you notice that I woke up at 5:30 am this morning, or was that you waking me up? You always did like to wake up early, otherwise you "slept half the day away!" Last night I read journal entry I put in on Bryce's birthday this year. I spoke about the amazing sunshine that, I am guessing, he requested for all of us. This morning, as I did my devotions on the porch, I couldn't help but this that you put in your birthday weather request, too. The air is cold and brisk with a tiny breeze. The clouds are rolling through quickly almost looking like we could get some rain. You would love the rain for the crops. You would say, "Let it rain!" If you were alive, we would have given you breakfast in bed. We would have given you the tripod to put over the campfire (that Uncle Chris bought us), and you would have loved it! You would have gone for a jog and gotten all sweaty. Then, you would have rubbed the sweat all over your boys to surprise them and listened to their squeals of disgust. After your shower, we would have gone to church. After church, we would go for your birthday meal of the "Birthday Boy's" choice. What would you have chosen??? The boys and I discussed it yesterday, and we discussed last year. If you would have had a certain craving you would have requested it, be it Mexican, DQ, or whatever. Otherwise, you would have said in your sweet and sarcastic tone, "I'm happy going anywhere, as long as I'm with my wife and boys." I kind of think we would have gone tubing down the river and ended the day with a bonfire which we are doing anyway tonight. I decided that we are gonna have a beer for you on your birthday. I'm sure you and Bryce will be hanging out with us. You know I would have made sure to spoil you all day long with lots of love and attention... It would have been a great day! It still will be. I love you dearly, sweetheart. Fill the voids in our day with smiles and memories. We could all use a lot of your simple reminders in life. You are the best, and as always, YOU ARE MY FAVORITE!!!
With all my love, Your Wife

I just needed to do that. Tim was such an incredible guy... He deserved so much goodness in his life. Did you know that he was a donor? He and I had discussed it after we got married because I am a donor on my driver's license. So, when he renewed his drivers license in '95, he became a donor. The night that he passed away, I got a call at 11:30 pm because there is only so much time before they cannot use the donor's tissues. Tim gave his tissue for children in the Burn Unit in the cities, he gave his bone for people with bone cancer and other bone diseases, and he gave the lens of his eyes. That is exactly what he would have wanted to do. He wanted to save lives by nutritional healing, but this time he saved lives with his own giving. I am so proud of him...

Tim has given us a few signs since he passed away that I want to share with you. The day after his service, I was getting ready for bed at 11 pm. I was in the bathroom and, as always, had the radio on. But, Logan had been listening to the Twins game and forgot to turn the station back to KTIS. So, I was in there for about 5 minutes with KWNG on when "So Happy Together" came on the radio. I couldn't help but smile for the next 5 minutes. That was my husband... It was awesome. I haven't heard that song on the radio for many years. Then, on Wednesday when I took Ethan in for his ear infection, he grabbed the crayons and said "Mom, lets both draw rainbows on the paper!" We've done this many times because Bryce loved drawing rainbows on the table paper at appointments. Our friend, Tammy, came in and saw our 2 rainbows. Well, later around supper time, I was driving back to camp watching the rainbow in the sky and thinking of Bryce and Tim. Whenever Tim and I saw rainbows, we thought of Bryce. And there it was! 2 rainbows in the sky!!! Tammy called me to make sure I saw them. One was very bright, and one was lighter above the bright one. It was beautiful and totally made me think of my Brycer and My Main Man... Wow... Tim's parents have had a few signs that have been really cool. Dad was fixing the end gate of Tim's truck box one day when he needed 4 screws that needed to be a certain length. Normally he said he would run to town to grab them because he never had luck finding the right sizes in Tim's stock pile of screws. But if Tim was there, he would just go into the truck shed and look into his collection (which was a lot of this and that!) and finally find the right sizes. He always seemed to find exactly what he needed... So, dad decided to give a try. He went to the work bench, and would you believe that there lay 4 screws together, the exact length that he was looking for?! So cool! Then, one day mom was driving home and saw dad in the field with Tim's new sprayer. Tim always did all the spraying so dad was trying to teach himself how to run it that day. Mom was guessing it was not going so well and stopped to check on dad. He wasn't stressed or anything, he just said, "I can't get it to spray." Mom left and said a few prayers to Tim to help dad figure it out. When she talked to dad later, he said he got it figured out and got it to spray after she left. Again, so cool! I can't remember if this was on the same day, but dad was fixing something--I think on the sprayer while he was in the field with it--and needed an O-Ring. He thought, "Where on earth am I going to find an O-Ring?" He then looked down on the steps of the sprayer, and there in a crack lay an O-Ring... Seriously. Tim never would have wanted to leave so much for his dad. Never. So, I believe he is trying to help as much as he possibly can to make it a little easier. And then, mom told me yesterday that she had 2 Blue Jays flying outside their home. I told her that one of the people from camp had just told me that blue jays are very spiritual... Again, so cool...

Camp Jornada was wonderful! We all enjoyed it so much!!! Thanks to our Camp Jornada family for holding us this past week and showing us a great time! You can go to Bryce's guest book and click on Stacey's camp video and see, and hear, the camp kids singing around the camp fire "Time of Your Life". It's awesome! I especially love the time with the kiddos there. They are all so amazing!!! On Thursday night, they had skits and cabin awards. At the end of the evening, they gave everyone glow sticks and turned out the lights. They told us how everyone here has been affected by cancer somewhere in their life. We then each broke our glow stick with how we were affected by cancer: If you've had cancer yourself, if your brother or sister..., if your mom or dad... It was a really special moment listening to all the sticks break at different times and then, watching the glow sticks be lifted into the air in the darkness... Wow. Thanks to Knute, Sid, and Jeremy for the special ceremony and orange glow stick afterward. And now, Bryce's song "Brave" starts to play on the radio... That's My Guy saying "Thanks for taking care of my mom."

Mitchell was so proud of getting 17 hours of sleep (total, yes, TOTAL!) all week long at camp. I told him (sarcastically, of course) that I have never been more proud. He then came home and slept from 2 pm Friday to 7 am Saturday--yes, that's right, 17 hours of sleep! As we were working in the garden yesterday, Logan said, "Mom, you usually say that when we are tired, we fight. But, you've been telling us how great we've been helping today, and we're not fighting." I said, "I know. I think you all must be well rested." Mitchell set his hoe to his side and said, "I think I could sleep another 17 hours!" Funny. I just had to giggle. The boys were such awesome helpers yesterday. We completed many tasks in the house and then, we weeded and tilled the garden...without any complaining! It was great, and the garden looks great. Their dad would be so proud of them! Bryce would be, too. We showered and went to Pastor Mike's wedding which was beautiful. The pastor there spoke on his sermon about "God's grace". I always say, "Thank goodness for God's grace!..." And then, this morning in my 2 devotional books, both of them spoke of "grace". 3 times I am hearing about God's grace...Bryce's number. God's grace to me is that little bit of slack in the rope or the extra elastic in the waistband of your shorts, especially when you've eaten too much. God is so forgiving and so loving. No matter what we do, think, say, feel...we have God's grace surrounding us. No matter where we are in life... God knows that I get angry that my son and husband have gone before me/us to heaven. He's ok with me getting angry, occasionally. He's just happy to be having a conversation with me (us) as Nyla would say who was told by Warren, Chaplain at Mayo Peds. We have God's grace, people! How lucky are we? We have unconditional love, forgiveness, compassion, kindness, guidance, mercy, and GRACE... Share that with other's. I'm keeping my blinders on and focusing on God's GRACE and God's PROMISES, God's shield of armor/protection of FAITH for our family, and living each day for the Lord until I reach heaven's gates and feel the embrace of Jesus, my husband, and my son...

Please say lots of prayers for my brother, Brad, who flies back to Oklahoma today. He was here for a few days. We spent some time with him last night. He leaves for Iraq (for a year) on Tuesday, I think. Please pray for his safety and God's guidance. We all love him so very much! "Love ya, like a brother, man!" My brother, Chris, and his wife, Gloria, and kids, Trachell and Sean, come back to MN on Thursday. We are so excited to spending time with them again. Chris and Glo came back for Tim's services, and we had taken our family vacation to stay with them in Hawaii in March. I am so glad we did... So many awesome memories... Love to all. God bless you all.

With Huge Continued Faith~

~Tim~ & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Wednesday, August 6, 2008 11:43 AM CDT
Cast your burden on the Lord, and He will sustain you. Psalms 55:22

'Tis said memories are golden
Well that maybe true.
But we never wanted memories
We only wanted you.

If tears could build a stairway
And heartaches make a lane,
We'd walk a path to heaven
And bring you home again.

Our family chain is broken
And nothing seems the same
But as God calls us one by one,
The chain will link again.

Thanks for putting this Bible scripture in the guest book, Tina!:

He was afraid and said, "How awesome is this place! This is none other than the house of God; this is the gate of heaven." Genesis 28:17

I truly believe that Tim was not ready to leave this earth, he told me that a few weeks before he passed away. He had too much to do with his boys and his wife, and he was such a reliable and responsible person. He would have rather finished "his work" than "burden" (so he thought) someone else with it. That's just how he was and who he was... My point being about the scripture is: 1)If Tim could have fought with God about his death while it was happening, he did. And, 2)This scripture was Tim's 2nd thought...(read it again) I truly believe THAT with all my heart... And then,.......He saw Bryce and Jesus. And, the EMBRACE took place... It was beautiful beyond words...

It would have been Tim's 38th birthday on this coming Sunday, August 10th... "Happy birthday to my most favorite person in the whole wide world!!! The father of my children. My best friend. The love of my life. Happy birthday, Honey. Have a glorious celebration in heaven with Jesus and Bryce. We all love and miss you so very much..." Now he will always be able to say he is younger than me...which he absolutely loved to rub in my face! haha.

Again, thank you--thank you--thank you for everything that you do for us. Hearts of compassion, just as God wants it. Your guest book entries, cards, calls, conversations, and emails comfort me, and my boys and Tim's parents, more than you will ever know. God is so good.

Ethan and I have been staying at Camp Jornada since we dropped the brothers off on Sunday afternoon. Remember, Camp Jornada holds a very special place in our hearts. The Camp Jornada family has held us for years. If ever there is anyone who wants to do something great for a really great cause, I always refer them to their church and Camp Jornada, also to KTIS radio. Camp Jornada is a camp for kids who have/had cancer, and siblings or parents who have/had cancer. It is truly amazing what these people do for these kids! They all volunteer their personal time! Like I've always said, my boys love it more than opening Christmas presents!!! If you want to read more about it or see some pictures, you can go to www.campjornada.org. I am so grateful that we did get ~Bryce~ there in 2006. He loved it! It's the brother's 3rd year there this year, and it is all in God's timing...2 weeks after there incredible Dad passed away. I'm so glad that camp was now. They are smiling and having fun. They are held and comforted. They are amongst an incredible group of family whom they hold very close to their hearts. Praise God.

So, Ethan and I came home last night around 10pm. We stayed at camp in the new Miracle Lodge at Ironwood Springs Christian Ranch in our own room. We came home to the smell of propane because the pilot light went out in our water heater. So, we stayed at Mom and Dad's (Tim's parents a mile up the road) last night. I will be bringing Ethan in to the doctor today because he has double ear infection. Then, I will be heading back to Camp around 4:30. So, needless to say, I am trying to get an update in and some paperwork done today before I head out until Friday when camp is done.

The boys are doing as good as can be expected. They are amazing. They are totally distracted by camp this week, thank goodness. Monday morning was the first morning that Ethan didn't cry about his dad dying--it was because he was at camp when he woke up. He cries every morning and every night. When we said our prayers last night, he said, "My dad was the greatest." as he cried. Bless his precious little heart... His daddy would read him stories, say prayers on his knees, and snuggle with him every night that he could. I was even telling Tim that Ethan needed to get used to falling asleep on his own. Tim would let him fall asleep on his own a few nights a week, but then would lay down with him again saying, "He falls asleep within 5 minutes. Life is too short." Do you see God's hands all over this story??? We never argued about laying with Ethan because we both knew, firsthand, that life is so precious... Ethan misses his daddy so much. Every morning, if Tim was home in bed (not in the truck or in the field), Ethan would wake up early and go to daddy's side of the bed. He would whisper to him to wake him up. Then, Tim would whisper back, so patiently, and pull him up into our bed with him. Ethan would either lay his head on Tim's big, bare chest or he would lay his whole body right on top of his chest. It was beautiful.......... The love that Tim gave us all was amazing... It is the memory of his love, his touch, his gestures, his words, his jokes, his temperment, his compassion, his willing heart, his everything, that we will hold onto in our hearts forever. As Ethan always says, "I still love my daddy FOREVER!" God be with us.

People have been doing so much for us. While he was home for Tim's service, my brother, Brad, took my car and had the oil changed, new tires put on and everything else that needed to be done so that I wouldn't have to worry about it for a long time. My brother, Chris, bought us a new dishwasher because on the day that I got home from Dallas (the day that Tim passed away), Tim told me that our dishwasher had finally died. We didn't finish our conversation about what we would do about it. Chris ordered one and had it delivered last week by my future sister-in-law, Debbie. Our friends, the Huemann's and Tipcke's, bought us a new door going out into the garage and installed it. The other one would have lasted longer had we not had so much traffic in and out from Tim's passing. Tom has been so great to help us with so much for Tim's services and a memorial dvd! Chris has been so great about helping with the truck. He is so much like Tim, in that sense. We have received, most importantly, powerful prayers, plus gifts of money for the boys future educations, music cd's for healing, books, a purple maple memory tree with solar lights, crosses, and so much more. Forgive me for what I have forgotten to mention... We are so very grateful! There are so many of our CB family's (whom we know or do not know) that are asking for prayers for our family, it is almost unbelievable but never too surprising with the Lord! The article that Dawn Schuette wrote in the Post-Bulletin was awesome! She was so great that day at our farm. She tried to be so strong for me while wiping away her tears. She stayed focused and on-task. She asked questions with integrity and sincerity. She is so genuine. Thank you God for sending Dawn to do the article... And, thank you to everyone who has sent notes and articles to us but, again, especially the prayers.

Last night at Camp Jornada was the Classic Car Cruise Night for the kids. The Stewy Cruisers have come to camp for 5 years, now to raise money for the camp. Last night they raised $1,200 for Camp Jornada! Yeah!!! It was awesome. I was on the phone with my father-in-law, Arnie, a few times during the day yesterday. He has a '55 Chevy that he restored. Tim has an '82 Cutlass Supreme that he loved! The boys and I drove it to the church for Tim's services both Thursday and Friday to honor him. He always joked that, "that car was how he won me over." The car was nice, but it was his heart that won me over... Anyway, Tim had restored the car this past year with Mitchell and Arnie's help. So, I called Tom, Tim's cousin, to ask him to bring the Cutlass down last night. He was more than honored, to say the least. He washed and waxed it, just as Tim would have wanted it. It was beautiful. For the Classic Car Cruise, what they do is line up all the cars and the kids vote for their favorite car. Then, we all hopped into cars (around 50 of them) and went for a Car Cruise Parade. Stacey (Camp Jornada co-founder) didn't realize that the Stewy Cruisers had lined up a Sheriff's escort and the mayor of Stewartville to lead the parade through Stewartville! It was awesome, and there could not have been a more perfect night, weather-wise. It was beautiful out! I rode with Tom, Cassie, and Ethan in Tim's Cutlass with the T-tops off--again, just as Tim would have wanted it! So, when we all got back, we all went to the chapel at camp so they could give out the trophies. They called out 3rd place, then 2nd place--both newer and faster awesome cars. Then, they said 1st place goes to #105. "I thought 105, ok... 105! That's Tim's car!!!Well, Tom better go up there." And then, I saw Stacey saying, "Susie, go up there!" So, I got up and got a hug from Stacey and couldn't help but ask her, "Did you have something to do with this?" She replied, "Nothing! The kids did it all! They voted!" They all knew it was Tim's car, and they knew our story......... Do you see, hear, and feel the compassion from these amazing kids????????!!!!!! Wow... So, I went up front and motioned to my boys to come per Stacey's request. Logan and Ethan hesitated but Mitch and Joel came right up beaming from head to toe... They gave us a standing ovation. It was unbelievable but again, nothing is impossible with God... So, thank you to all of the awesome, incredible Camp Jornada kids! I know that Tim and Bryce were just beaming from heaven as they watched it all unfold. Again, I see God's hands all over everything!!! What a night! I didn't even think of bringing the Cutlass down, it was dad's idea. And, dad has had some amazing signs from Tim, too since his passing... I will share them sometime.

Last Friday, the boys and I went to River Falls to pick out me and Tim's stone for the cemetary. They were ok about going but had playtime on their minds and wanted to get to the Huemann's asap. It was a lot of work to get the boys focused but when I had them stop and listen to me explain that I understood that they probably didn't want to be there anymore than I did, they kind of snapped out of it and dug right in. We were all so pleased with our decisions. It will be beautiful! Mitchell and Logan were especially great helpers and wanted to be a part of the decision-making process in honor of their dad. We are looking forward to possibly having it there by the end of August or beginning of September. The father and son team at Melgard Monument Co. are so great! I can't say enough good things about them. They are also so very compassionate towards our family. God bless them.

I know this is a long entry, and I'm sure that I have forgotten something--remember, Tim always said I was too "windy"!--but I must go. Please know that God is working in your lives, too! I believe it with all my heart. Open your hearts and minds to see and hear His work in your life. Imagine the possibilities... Again, God never said life would be easy but He is eluminating your path and making it straight. He will ease your pain and your burdens, if you give them all to Him. He will bring you peace and joy that you can find no where else in this broken world. And now, a great song comes into my mind reminding me of Vacation Bible School at church in June: "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength." Mark 12:30 (Found it!)(Forgive me, again I need to get better about remembering where the scriptures are in the Bible.) God is ever-present in our lives. What a great feeling and relief!

I really want all of you to know that I can truly feel Tim's presence, too. I feel like he is making sure that we are being taken care of. The first week, I could feel him there watching me sleep to make sure I got enough rest. He was just like that. Brycer is there, too. Sending me songs and lots of love and compassion. God is good. We love you all... God bless you all...

With Huge Continued Faith~

~Tim~ & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Thursday, July 31, 2008 5:00 PM CDT
Cast your burden on the Lord, and He will sustain you. Psalms 55:22

Thank you so much for all of the prayers and support you have been sending us by mail, phone, and guest book entries. YOU ARE ALL SO AMAZING!!! God is so good...

'Tis said memories are golden
Well that maybe true.
But we never wanted memories
We only wanted you.

If tears could build a stairway
And heartaches make a lane,
We'd walk a path to heaven
And bring you home again.

Our family chain is broken
And nothing seems the same
But as God calls us one by one,
The chain will link again.

The house is becoming more quiet again which is welcomed because that brings us closer to a little bit of normalcy. We have always enjoyed having friends and family over, we just never wanted it to be under these circumstances, once again. God has blessed our family more than we ever imagined that we could receive... He has placed people in our lives, and in our paths, that He knew would be needed some day. We thank and praise Him everyday for all of you!

I almost forgot. We had an interview with a reporter (who was sincere, genuine and caring) from the Rochester Post Bulletin newspaper on Tuesday. The article will be in tomorrow's (August 1st) newspaper, possibly in Section B (for Bryce & Breuer!). I thought you may want to know.

I want you all to know that we are hanging in there... I guess we've learned on our journey in life that GOD WILL PROVIDE...and, He has. I have been praying for peace and joy to come into my heart again for months. It was really tough again at Bryce's 1 year heavenly birthday in February. My joy is less today than it was 2 weeks ago but the peace in my heart is from God alone. I do not have peace that my husband (the Love of my life!) has passed away, that I am now a widow at 38 years of age, that my boys will live the rest of their lives without their incredible father, that our grandchildren will never know that Grandpa, that once again...dreams are shattered--and lots of them. No, the peace in my heart is KNOWING THAT GOD IS EVERYWHERE in our lives. He is holding us, sustaining us, crying with us, protecting and guarding us, and loving us with His all-comforting UNCONDITIONAL LOVE. I trust with all of my heart that HE WILL GET US THROUGH THIS... I've never had so much trust and peace in my heart. Nope, I'm not saying it's gonna be easy. I've told the boys that it is going to get way worse before it gets better. I know that there will be days, many in a row, that I will not answer the phone or the door. (Remember, I've been through this before, and yet I'm not an "expert".) This truly will be the biggest and worst challenge of my life and my boys lives. But, I have all the faith in my soul that God will get us through this. I just want to continue living each day by God's grace (thank goodness we have it!), do God's work, teach my boys to have God as the center of their lives and to trust in His plan, and know that by doing these simple things...I will someday see the face of Jesus and feel the embrace of my husband and son, once again. I know that they will be waiting for me (and everyone) on the other side. I too want to hear, "Well done, good and faithful servent."

So, this week I have been getting all of our ducks in a row with the bank, insurance, bills, the boys, etc. Thank goodness that my awesome parents-in-law are so wonderful--they did raise my husband remember... My mom has been so great, too. We have also had many helpers here working on thank you's. What a blessing everyone has been for us! We are so grateful. Tomorrow, I want to take my boys to look at stones for Tim's grave site. I want to get the ball rolling and get it ordered within the next few weeks. I am doing as much as I can this week because, frankly, I know what lies ahead...lots of reality setting in, loneliness, and tears. Again, we've been through this before only this time I don't have my better-half...the BEST of the BEST to help me and the boys through it. I can honestly say that I am not allowing my brain to jump too far ahead because it hurts too bad to think about not hearing Tim's voice again on the phone when I call him 3 times a day...to not feel his embrace...to not kiss his "fluffy" lips...to not hold his strong hands...to not see him teaching his boys the lessons in life or loving them with all his heart...to not seeing him in his truck, tractor, or combine or in the drivers seat of the car or suburban...so many, many things. I don't want to go there. This was enough already. I will take each day as I can and help my boys through it all. I will always remind them of their, one and only, #1 Dad and the things about him, like what he would say or do. Our parents have so much pain, too. They are absolutely amazing. I truly believe God hand picks everyone and sends them "equipped", just like He did with Bryce.

As for Bryce and Tim now being together in heaven...that brings a beautiful picture into my mind and a gentle smile upon my face. They are together, once again. Never in my mind did I think there would be such tragedy like this in our lives at such young ages for all of us, including Bryce. This is exactly why we need to embrace each and every day that God gives us. Live and love. Honor and respect. Praise and forgive. Love, love, love. Trust in God's plan and try to stop controlling everything in life. His plan is far more perfect than our's. It's not up to us anyway...is it now?! And, always remember, somebody always has it worse. Life is so much about attitude... Nope, mine is not always the best. Tim saw that many times, and he still loved me so very much. All that I know and believe with all my heart is that, no matter what, God will always get all the glory...

After Tim passed away on that Saturday, I remembered one of our 2 songs that we always sang (silly, of course) to each other. It was our 2nd favorite song: "So Happy Together". I couldn't remember the main song for anything! By Monday morning I was getting pretty frustrated that I couldn't even think of our main song. Then, it hit me! Why not ask Tim to help me think of it like I've asked Bryce to help me find things (which he did!)? So, I said to Tim, "Honey, I need you to help me think of our main song, ok?" And, before I could even get "ok" out in my head, I heard "You're Still the One" (that makes me smile)!!!!!!!! He did it! He told me the song and showed me that he is still with me! Praise God! I also know that Bryce has been sending "Brave" and "Legacy" on the radio waves for me, too. I truly believe that the Holdy Spirit is working to show me that God is holding us up each and every day... Please keep all of the prayers coming. They will be needed for a very long time. Again, we are so grateful for everyone in our lives. God bless you all...

Monday, July 22, 2008 11:47 PM CDT
"Be merciful to me, LORD, for I am faint; O LORD, heal me, for my bones are in agony. My soul is in anguish. How long, O LORD, how long? Turn, O LORD, and deliver me; save me because of your unfailing love." Psalm 6:2-4

"I am weary with my sighing; Every night I make my bed swim, I dissolve my couch with my tears. My eye has wasted away with grief." Psalm 6:6-7

I've had a few friends suggest that we collect "Tim stories and memories" for a book. This is a wonderful idea to me! I want our boys to hear the stories about their awesome dad! He won't be able to tell the stories so receiving them from other's who enjoy telling them would be great! Here's our thoughts. We will have paper provided at the church so you can write (or type, if you do it ahead of time) your stories down on paper and bring them to Tim's visitation and service. Please do not forget to include your name and city. *Also, please try to make sure your writing is legible, just in case we have trouble reading it. Thank you!* We have 3 baskets to put the stories and memories into to collect them. Or you can type them into Bryce's guest book, and we will print them off to put in the book. I have all of my many stories with the love of my life for my boys...many hilarious memories that the boys shouldn't hear just yet, and many beautiful memories along with our struggles. With each memory of my wonderful "main man" (as I always said), there is the presence of God. His hands are all over everything. I praise God for His grace and mercy in our lives.

Thank you to all of our family, friends, and people we do not even know who are lifting us up in prayer and supporting us along this, once again, "new normal" and new journey. God has blessed us with so many wonderful, giving people in our lives.

You can view Tim's obituary at www.lundbergfuneral.com. In lieu of flowers, I have requested memorials be given in Tim�s memory for our sons� future educations.

Monday, July 21, 2008 7:33 PM CDT

Thank you all for your outpouring of support with prayers and messages that you have sent our way. Every single prayer is so greatly appreciated... The loss and emptiness that my boys and I feel is unexplainable. Your prayers and words bring us comfort. I just wanted to put in an update to give you some information about Tim and his services. Tim's cause of death was a Ruptured Cerebral Artery Aneurism--a brain aneurism. An artery in his brain had a weak spot that ruptured. It could have been there all his life. There is nothing that could have prevented it or kept him alive. He did not have high blood pressure, and the coroner also said it is not hereditary...Thank you God. Because I've reached my limit... I just keep telling myself that GOD WILL PROVIDE...

Tim's visitation and service (funeral--I just DO NOT like saying that again, this time about my husband) will be at St. Luke Lutheran Church in Goodhue. Every location will be the same as Bryce's service.

The visitation is at St. Luke's Lutheran Church on Thursday, July 24th from 4-8 pm and 9:30-10:30 am on Friday. The service will be at 10:30 am. We will have a short burial service at Evergreen Cememtary after the service at church. Tim will be buried next to Bryce, just as it should be. Lunch will be served at the Lion's Building. Thank you to everyone who is making all of this possible. My brain is not functioning up to par since since my husband went Home to be with the Lord and his son. My heart hurts more than I could have ever imagined it hurting....and it hurt so bad when Bryce passed away and was still hurting. But, now I am so consumed with the pain of my husbands passing and helping my boys that I can't even take the time to think of my Brycer, which about kills me even more.

Please say specific prayers for our strength and healing. Please pray for us to get good rest. Please pray for our families, especially Tim's parents, Arnie and Linda, and his sister's, Michelle and Amanda. He was the BEST of the BEST. He will be missed by everyone so much! We are all hurting so much. Our boys are not doing well unless they are kept busy with family and friends. At prayer time, Tim always remember to thank God for all of our friends and family who are praying for us and helping us with everything. I am so grateful that my boys watched their dad get on his knees and pray at bedtime and they heard him say his prayers of thanks at mealtime. What a reflection of their father they are.... Praise God.

I just want to spread the word that I have been sharing with everyone... Love each other. Forgive each other. Respect each other. Bless one another. Do God's word. Please, please, please just love each other because life is so precious, and life is so short. I can't even imagine living without my husband, my best friend, the LOVE OF MY LIFE!!!! We were united as one. He gave me so much strength. We were healing together after Bryce's passing. He received EVERY thought that ever occured in my brain. We shared it all. But, now I must go on in my days and try to find joy and help my boys heal. "Breathe in, breathe out." It's a good thing I don't have to tell my heart to beat because I would most definitely forget. But, I must also remember that someone always has it worse... Me? I had the most incredible husband for 15 years--actually we were together for 18 1/2 years--, and the boys had the most amazing, awesome father, in the whole world!!! I am the lucky one. We are the lucky one's. God is so good. I just pray that our boys will have, and feel, the love that their parents always felt. We never hid our love from our boys because we knew we wanted them to have what we have. No, our marriage was not perfect... But, it was darn close to perfect! Never in my mind did I know that I could love someone so very, very much. I give God all the glory for bringing Tim and I together. God is so good. Tim was the BEST of the BEST!!! I am so grateful that he raised his boys for 13 (Mitchell) years at least. I have been enjoying hearing the memories of my wonderful husband. So please, do share your memories with me and our boys. I wish I could write them all down in a book to keep forever. And, yes, the embrace between father and son was beyond words.... I know that Bryce was waiting for him on the other side. I also know that Tim is standing in heaven in AWE....as Bryce shows him around while riding on his dads shoulders once again. And, as always, God gets all the glory.

Saturday, July 19, 2008 11:53 PM CDT
Our hearts are breaking into pieces tonight....

Please say many, many huge prayers for our family.

The love of my life, my incredible husband, the boys most amazing father, has gone Home with Bryce and now Lives in Eternity... He too is walking with Jesus only 17 months after Bryce's passing. We are not sure yet but think he may have had a heart attack at 37 years of age. Way too young for ME and OUR BOYS!!! Please pray for our strength. I trust completely in the Lord and His presence.

I love Tim so very, very much. He will always be my best friend. Our love for each other is powerful beyond words. His boys' cannot even fathom life without their incredible Dad.... Please pray for our boys without ceasing.

Please do not let your faith falter... This too I will find out when I reach heavens gates.

With Huge Faith~

Susie

Monday, June 23, 2008 10:03 AM CDT
"Be strong and courageous and get to work. Don't be frightened by the size of the task, for the Lord my God is with you; He will not forsake you. He will see to it that everything is finished correctly." 1 Chronicles 28:20

In the rising of the sun and in its going down, we remember them.
In the blowing of the wind and in the chill of winter, we remember them.
In the opening of the buds and in the warmth of summer, we remember them.
In the rustling of the leaves and the beauty of autumn, we remember them.
In the beginning of the year and when it ends, we remember them.
When we are weary and in need of strength, we remember them.
When we have joys we yearn to share, we remember them.
So long as we live, they too shall live, for they are now a part of us as we remember them.
8th Annual Camp Jornada Wine tasting and benefit auction

June 26th, 2008 6-9 pm

Radisson Hotel Ballroom

Tickets $25.00 at all Andy's liquor stores or at the door.

Come one, come all! Help raise money to send kids with cancer or their siblings or kids who have parents who have/have had cancer to Camp Jornada!

Good morning,

**And now, as I type about Camp Jornada, Bryce's song "Brave" begins to play on the radio... Bryce wants to help these kids! Please do all you can for them! Share the compassion that Bryce has for all these kids who are enduring so much in their lifetime...**

Share your love... That was our message at Vacation Bible School last week. I had the privilege of teaching Bryce's class... I just love those kids so much! On Friday night, Bryce showed us that he has been with us all week. We were talking about Jesus and what he has done for us. We were talking about Bryce and heaven when suddenly I noticed out the window was a gorgeous RAINBOW!!! Bryce loved rainbows and always drew them in (almost) all of his pictures. That rainbow was the longest lasting rainbow that I have ever seen!!! It was amazing and such a beautiful message for all of us. Thank you God and Bryce for reminding us that you are always with us!

My heart has been hurting so much lately. Yes, I miss my son terribly but there is so much more. In attempt to help me heal, I have been trying to keep my focus on Bryce's purpose on earth for God and how he fulfilled that earthly purpose for God with such dignity and love for the Lord. He is now fulfilling his heavenly purpose for God... Now, I am trying to create a focus of my earthly purpose for God...not for my will but for God's will. It's so easy to try to take control (being the human's that we are) and be such a "planner" when really it is so good and important to wait upon the Lord (without making excuses). It's all in God's perfect timing, not mine... My trust is in the Lord...with my whole heart. My boys are all so amazing. Just as your children are... I truly believe that part of our purpose on this earth is to teach our children about Jesus and his work. My life has never been so filled with blessings and gratitude as it is now with God at the center of it. I'm sharing that with my boys. With God at the center, I lean on Him...

The pain that my heart feels is for the children and adults who are suffering. God never said life would be easy. Are we all 'paying it forward'? It's a movie that my boys and I watched last night. Do good for other's and pass it on...Pay it forward. My Brycer always wanted to do good for others. I remember when a neighbor of our's was sick, Bryce's first comment was "We should bring them some food." He learned that from all of you and all you have done for us for the past 5 years! He was only about 6 years old when he said that. We have a friend who has relapsed from his Neuroblastoma. His name is Jackson Schneider (CB page is jacksonschneider) and my heart just hurts for him and his family... He is now starting chemo and radiation, again. He will soon be going out to New York for more treatments. Tim and I cry for these children and their family's. Isaac, Melanie, Will, Jackson, Jacob, Jamie, Carrie, Leann, Lisa....I could go on and on. Again, God never said life would be easy, and I do believe that God sends them "equipped", like he did with Bryce. Please don't ever stop the prayers for these wonderful people and their healing and trust in the Lord!!! Please don't ever stop praying for the family's who have lost a child, sibling, spouse, friend,...any loved one. The pain is so completely unbearable some days... It has been 16 months since Bryce went Home to be with the Lord. We miss him so very much. I pray that none of you have to feel the pain we feel. I am just so grateful for my faith, my husband, my boys, and our friends and family's. My love is for the Lord and for the most wonderful people in my life, and to share my love with so many others...just as God wants us to. We are so grateful to God that He is healing so many of our friends that we have met along the journey...Ethan, Rachel, Will, Wes, Joshi, Alyssa, Ella, Ellen, Austin, Nikki, Kristina, Darcie, Pam... God is so good!!! All the glory goes to Him... Thank you so much for all that you do for us. We are eternally grateful!!!

"Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted." Matthew 5:3-4

For my Brycer:
"To him who overcomes, I will give the right to eat from the tree of life, which is in the paradise of God." Revelation 2:7

"To the man who pleases Him, God gives wisdom, knowledge and happiness." Ecclesiastes 2:26

"Teach me to do Your will, for You are my God; may Your good Spirit lead me on level ground." Psalm 143:10

"I am the Way, the Truth, and the LIFE." John 14:6
**From Bryce's favorite Bible book marker which has Jesus' picture on the front.

"Walk by faith, not by sight." 2 Corin. 5:7
**Bryce's favorite!!!

"With God all things are possible." Matthew 19:26.
My favorite!

"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
Isaiah 41:10

"I will build them up and not tear them down; I will plant them and not uproot them. I will give them a heart to know me, that I am the Lord. They will be my people, and I will be their God." Jeremiah 24:6-7

"But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40:31

We've met many new faces on our son's journey with cancer. We feel the pain of many family's who also struggle with cancer or another life-threatening disease. Please say a prayer for all the little people on 3 Francis of St. Mary's Hospital. Pray for God's healing touch for each one of these children. Pray for strength for each of their family's. And, pray for those who have not yet placed their child in God's hands, to do so. They need to give Him all of the control. With God, we have everything. Without Him, we have nothing. Please continue to send out prayers for all those fighting their battles, like Will, Kristin, Kristina, Griffin, Jackson, Isaac, Melanie, Signe, Teagon, Rachel, Wes, Paul, Heidi, Ethan, Joe, Jamie, Nikki, Brock, Sierra, Ellen, Austin, Kat, Audrey, Barbara, Josh, Rian, & Alyssa. Pray for strength for all of the family's who have lost a loved one to cancer or another disease. These people are all so special to us!!! Give them strength, Lord, and give them peace within.

Take Care & God Bless~

The Breu Crew
Tim & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Sunday, June 1, 2008 9:27 PM CDT
"Be strong and courageous and get to work. Don't be frightened by the size of the task, for the Lord my God is with you; He will not forsake you. He will see to it that everything is finished correctly." 1 Chronicles 28:20

In the rising of the sun and in its going down, we remember them.
In the blowing of the wind and in the chill of winter, we remember them.
In the opening of the buds and in the warmth of summer, we remember them.
In the rustling of the leaves and the beauty of autumn, we remember them.
In the beginning of the year and when it ends, we remember them.
When we are weary and in need of strength, we remember them.
When we have joys we yearn to share, we remember them.
So long as we live, they too shall live, for they are now a part of us as we remember them.
Camp Jornada needs your help!
Donation of �themed� gift baskets or gift items for Rochester-Fest.

8th Annual Camp Jornada Wine tasting and benefit auction

June 26th, 2008 6-9 pm

Radisson Hotel Ballroom

Tickets $25.00 at all Andy's liquor stores or at the door.

Camp Jornada Foundation is looking for donations of �themed� style gift baskets. If you would like to donate a basket, go together with others to donate a basket, or donate just a few items that could be included in a basket it would be very much appreciated! This event is to raise money to send children with cancer to summer camp on Aug 2-8th in Stewartville.
We are asking that all items be new and not used items. Thank you so much!

Please contact Camp Jornada staff at jornadarocks@hotmail.com if you would be interested in helping out with this kind of project.

Your donation would be most appreciated. Thank you very much!
Baskets or items must be dropped off by June, 18th 2008.

Good Evening,

We are so happy for warm MN weather! We've been busy this week. The garden is planted... The orange flowers are all planted. I am sure that Bryce was right there along side of us through it all. In fact, as we were walking out to the garden that day, a beautiful yellow and black butterfly flew right in between us! It was awesome! Bryce was always one of the first one's out to the garden to get all the vegies in the ground along with a little play-time in the dirt with his brothers. He would have loved to see the orange flowers. I know that he thinks (from heaven) that they are so pretty. He was such a gardener...a farmer like his dad. He even had his own garden gloves and tools. We just had to make sure we doused him with sunscreen on his fair skin. He did not like the sunscreen part! We still have some sweet corn that we will gradually plant so it is not all ready at one time, and also some garlic and asparagas. We all enjoy watching it grow. The weeding part...we don't enjoy. Ethan did get up the next morning to see if all the seeds had sprouted up out of the ground, yet. It was cute. I remember Logan doing the same thing at that age. Ethan even goes over and water the plants without being asked to do so! How long will that last???

We went to the Memorial Service at the Evergreen Cemetary--that is where Bryce's earthly resting place is. It was very nice. We've usually been at my dad's on Memorial weekend. What a great tribute to all of the men and women who sacrificed for our country. It was great to have the boys' see it all. Yesterday, we went to Minneapolis to the ceremony for Task Force 34 who will be leaving for Fort Sill in OK in June, and then to Iraq in August. My brother, Brad, is part of TF34 with the National Guard. He will be gone a year. He is such a wonderful person and brother. We are all so very proud of him. He is the oldest of 7 children. He read Bryce's eulogy at his celebration of life and is one of Bryce's Godfather's. He sang "The Lord's Prayer" at our wedding 15 years ago. He always took such good, and special, care of me when I was a little girl...and he still does. We would all appreciate your prayers for his safety over the next at least 12 months. He is truly the BEST...

The blood bank has been so helpful with all of the info on the blood donations. Thanks to everyone at the Hilton Blood Bank! Again, Bryce received 67 platelet transfusions, 29 red cell transfusions, and 2 stem cell transfusions. 98 total in less than 4 years. From responses via email and the donor sheet, I have around 35 total blood donors! That's with a little help from the Lake City Clinic blood drive that was originally set up in honor of Bryce. It's all good!!! I'm not sure if I am correct, but I believe with 1 unit of blood, you can help 3 people. How great is that?! Sooooo very cool..... Thank you to everyone who gave blood, who attempted to give blood, and to everyone who gave blood recently and can give blood in the future after their waiting period! I know that little Melanie (caringbridge.org/visit/melanie) received some blood right after Bryce's birthday, and her mother, Amber, was also very grateful!!! We gave Melanie her tie-blanket and prayer rocks that Bryce's classmates made for her. She loves them! I'll have to get the pictures on...just give me some time. I'm still trying to play catch up for the last 5 years of medical stuff....excuses, excuses.... I'm getting there, though. What a good feeling to have some things cleaned up and put away.

I went through a lot of cards that were sent after Bryce went to heaven. It was difficult and made me sad but it also gave me some more healing... I'll take all I can get. The words everyone wrote gave me peace and such good memories of who Bryce was as a person... He was so incredible... I'm just so proud of him and his brothers... What beautiful memories he left for us. What a legacy of faith, hope, love, and trust in the Lord for his life. He was amazing. He taught me so much... Now, if I could just always remember it all. I love you, Brycer. You're my guy...

Prayers are always needed... Will (caringbridge.org/mn/willcanan) has his MRI and CT scan tomorrow. Please say many prayers tonight and all day tomorrow for peace in his heart and his parent's hearts. I truly believe he is going to get the "All Clear!" again! We just know how, no matter what, you still worry just a bit in the back of your mind. Their family is just awesome! I spoke with Liz, Will's mom, on Saturday so that was a blessing in my day. These family's that we have met along the way are like family to us. We can read each other's thoughts and finishes each other's sentences... Speaking of that, Ethan (caringbridge.org/visit/ethanstrenge) has scans on June 10th, so please add him to your prayer list. His mom is like a sister to me. Forgive me, I am tired, weepy, and sappy (or mushy as my boys call it) tonight. I just love and care for all of these people and their incredible children so much!!! There are way (!!!!) too many enduring what they do!!! Griffin has his monthly appt. tomorrow. Prayers for him. Melanie has a fever today. Prayers for her! Jamie is finding out what the next step is for her treatments. Prayers for her. Prayers for my friend, Pam, who has been in the hospital for her stomach. She is now home. Prayers for someone we met about 3 years ago, Darcie, who lives by my dad up north who is also dealing with stomache problems. Today, we just met with Chris Rodgers and his wife, June, to give them ideas about the organic diet and things that we did with Bryce. Prayers for him and his family. We get to see Isaac on Tuesday (!!!!! Can't wait!) to give him his goodies from Bryce's classmates. What an incredible little guy he is...just like they all are. Prayers for him as he is going into bone marrow transplant soon. PRAYERS, PRAYERS AND MORE PRAYERS FOR EVERYONE!!!

Now, I am going to try to go to bed early tonight before the "water works" start. God is so good. I've really been trying to do what my devotions have been speaking about this week: Adoration for the Lord. I am so grateful for my life and my continued guidance by God. He has blessed me beyond imagination. Again, if I could just remember each and every time to thank Him and look to Him for guidance before I do, say, or think what He does not want me to... Working on daily self-discipline and daily habits. Just looking at the beautiful day today is an awesome reminder of how we can adore the Lord for His goodness and mercy. We are grateful for all of you! Our love and gratitude to all of you FOREVER... Goodnight.

"Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted." Matthew 5:3-4

For my Brycer:
"To him who overcomes, I will give the right to eat from the tree of life, which is in the paradise of God." Revelation 2:7

"To the man who pleases Him, God gives wisdom, knowledge and happiness." Ecclesiastes 2:26

"Teach me to do Your will, for You are my God; may Your good Spirit lead me on level ground." Psalm 143:10

"I am the Way, the Truth, and the LIFE." John 14:6
**From Bryce's favorite Bible book marker which has Jesus' picture on the front.

"Walk by faith, not by sight." 2 Corin. 5:7
**Bryce's favorite!!!

"With God all things are possible." Matthew 19:26.
My favorite!

"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
Isaiah 41:10

"I will build them up and not tear them down; I will plant them and not uproot them. I will give them a heart to know me, that I am the Lord. They will be my people, and I will be their God." Jeremiah 24:6-7

"But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40:31

We've met many new faces on our son's journey with cancer. We feel the pain of many family's who also struggle with cancer or another life-threatening disease. Please say a prayer for all the little people on 3 Francis of St. Mary's Hospital. Pray for God's healing touch for each one of these children. Pray for strength for each of their family's. And, pray for those who have not yet placed their child in God's hands, to do so. They need to give Him all of the control. With God, we have everything. Without Him, we have nothing. Please continue to send out prayers for all those fighting their battles, like Will, Kristin, Kristina, Griffin, Jackson, Isaac, Melanie, Signe, Teagon, Rachel, Wes, Paul, Heidi, Ethan, Joe, Jamie, Nikki, Brock, Sierra, Ellen, Austin, Kat, Audrey, Barbara, Josh, Rian, & Alyssa. Pray for strength for all of the family's who have lost a loved one to cancer or another disease. These people are all so special to us!!! Give them strength, Lord, and give them peace within.

Take Care & God Bless~

The Breu Crew
Tim & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Friday, May 23, 2008 9:11 AM CDT
"Be strong and courageous and get to work. Don't be frightened by the size of the task, for the Lord my God is with you; He will not forsake you. He will see to it that everything is finished correctly." 1 Chronicles 28:20

Good Morning,

I wanted to let you know that we have a total for Bryce's transfusions that he received in the almost 4 years of his battle with leukemia. From May 20, 2003 to February 20, 2007 Bryce received 67 platelet transfusions, 29 red cell transfusions, and 2 stem cell transfusions. 98 total. Bryce was born in 1998, so that is how I will remember the total transfusions that he received.

THANK YOU TO ALL THE DONORS WHO KEPT MY SON ALIVE THROUGH ALL OF HIS TREATMENTS!!! You not only extended his life and CREATED MORE MEMORIES FOR OUR FAMILY but you have saved lives of people we may not even know. Little Melanie received a transfusion on Wednesday. We don't know whose blood it was but, as Melanie's mom, Amber, said on her webpage (www.caringbridge.org/visit/melanie), it may have been one of YOU! PRAISE GOD FOR THOSE WHO ARE ABLE TO DONATE BLOOD!!! We pray for your health, your safety, and that you give God all the glory that you are able to help other's! It's all in God's perfect plan... I apologize but I don't have a total for you of donor's, yet. I will get that to you next week. God is good...

We are so excited that our buddy, Brock Erickson, has a new little brother! Braxton Victor was born on May 20th. They now have 4 boys! Bryce told Megan in January '07 that she "only had 2 more to catch up with our family!" Only one to go, Shawn and Megan!!! I know that you know that Bryce is watching over you and little Braxton. I truly believe that he will never leave Brock's side. Brock has been done with his chemo treatments for almost 2 years now, I believe. Praise God! We love and adore you, Erickson's!!! Congratulations! Boys' are wonderful!!!

We had a wonderful birthday party for Bryce on Sunday with friends and family. The day was beautiful, the food was awesome. Just as Bryce would have wanted it! As soon as everyone was gone, "Brave" began to play on the radio telling me, "I'm here, Mom. I enjoyed the whole day! Thank you!" He was always so polite and compassionate and appreciative! Leading up to the days, I received many signs from Bryce. Thank you, God! I was very strong over the weekend while having the help from my big boys cleaning the house. It's the days after being strong that you kinda crash. It's like you hold it inside--or maybe not, you just have some better days--and then the emotions roll on in on a later date... Wednesday and Thursday were tough. But, as always, God brings us through it. God is the one and only way. Jesus totally brings peace into our lives and into our hearts. I founda a prayer in the Lutheran Prayer Book that I want to share. It's a prayer in time of suffering. It also made me think of Bryce during his suffering:

Behold me, my beloved Jesus, weighed down under the burden of my trials and sufferings, I cast myself at Your feet, that You may renew my strength and courage, while I rest here in Your Presence.
Permit me to lay down my cross in Your Sacred Heart, for only Your infinite goodness can sustain me; only Your love can help me bear my cross; only Your powerful hand can lighten its weight.
O Divine King, Jesus, whose heart is so compassionate to the afflicted, I wish to live in You; suffer and die in You. During my life be to me my model and my support; At the hour of my death, be my hope and my refuge. Amen.
Let the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be acceptable in thy sight, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer. Psalm 19

I continue to ask for prayers for our friends who suffer and continue on in their battles... Isaac (www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaachall), Melanie, Ryan (who has appts today to find out if he will need his neck fused or not--praying that his neck is helaling on its own! wwww.carepages.com rdbuck), Jamie, Katie, Leann, Lisa, and all the family's who have lost a loved one. Praying for peace and endurance, determination to live every day in the Lord's light, strength and faith. God wants us to love everyone and ask for forgiveness. I have my own daily struggles besides the loss of my precious son. As I have said before... My mission in life is to bring people closer to the Lord. My goal in life is HEAVEN. Let God work in your life, and when He shows you He is there...GIVE HIM ALL THE GLORY, no matter what! Thankful for all of YOU...

"Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted." Matthew 5:3-4

Please include these wonderful people who are fighting their own battles in your prayers:
www.caringbridge.org/mn/willcanan *Will is continuing on his chemo treatments for a brain tumor and is just an amazing kid!
Leann and Lisa who continue to fight and will also win their battles with the Lord by their side.

For my Brycer:
"To him who overcomes, I will give the right to eat from the tree of life, which is in the paradise of God." Revelation 2:7

"To the man who pleases Him, God gives wisdom, knowledge and happiness." Ecclesiastes 2:26

"Teach me to do Your will, for You are my God; may Your good Spirit lead me on level ground." Psalm 143:10

"I am the Way, the Truth, and the LIFE." John 14:6
**From Bryce's favorite Bible book marker which has Jesus' picture on the front.

"Walk by faith, not by sight." 2 Corin. 5:7
**Bryce's favorite!!!

"With God all things are possible." Matthew 19:26.
My favorite!

"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
Isaiah 41:10

"I will build them up and not tear them down; I will plant them and not uproot them. I will give them a heart to know me, that I am the Lord. They will be my people, and I will be their God." Jeremiah 24:6-7

"But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40:31

We've met many new faces on our son's journey with cancer. We feel the pain of many family's who also struggle with cancer or another life-threatening disease. Please say a prayer for all the little people on 3 Francis of St. Mary's Hospital. Pray for God's healing touch for each one of these children. Pray for strength for each of their family's. And, pray for those who have not yet placed their child in God's hands, to do so. They need to give Him all of the control. With God, we have everything. Without Him, we have nothing. Please continue to send out prayers for all those fighting their battles, like Will, Kristin, Kristina, Griffin, Jackson, Isaac, Melanie, Signe, Teagon, Rachel, Wes, Paul, Heidi, Ethan, Joe, Jamie, Nikki, Brock, Sierra, Ellen, Austin, Kat, Audrey, Barbara, Josh, Rian, & Alyssa. Pray for strength for all of the family's who have lost a loved one to cancer or another disease. These people are all so special to us!!! Give them strength, Lord, and give them peace within.

Take Care & God Bless~

The Breu Crew
Tim & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Sunday, May 18, 2008 6:27 AM CDT
"Be strong and courageous and get to work. Don't be frightened by the size of the task, for the Lord my God is with you; He will not forsake you. He will see to it that everything is finished correctly." 1 Chronicles 28:20

"Be patient, then, brothers, until the Lord's coming. See how the farmer waits for the land to yield its valuable crop and how patient he is for the autumn and spring rains. You too, be patient and stand firm, because the Lord's coming is near." James 5:7-8
HAPPY (10th) BIRTHDAY, BRYCE ANDREW!!! Thank you, God for the sunshine this morning! It's brighter than bright and I can't help but wonder if it is my Brycie Boy's million-dollar smile shining down on us... God's beauty that surrounds us is incredible... Let's all soak it up today in memory of Bryce.

I will never forget how beautiful it was the day that Bryce was born... I went into labor with him at 2:24 am. He was born at 9:25 am by c-section. He was 8 pounds even and 21 inches. We couldn't believe it when we saw the red hair!!! He was so incredibly beautiful and precious! Three boys! I loved it! We weren't sure on a name (Ross, Kyle, or Bryce) but I kept wanting to call him Bryce. So, dad said, "Bryce it is!" He was such a good and easy baby. He smiled at 2 weeks. He was patient and always full of joy. This explains the title he received from his mommy, the "3rd one's a charm!"... He grew to be a BIG CHUNKER!!! He didn't crawl until he was 10 months old, and he walked at 16 months! He was so mellow (never demanding) that he didn't do much but smile, laugh, and look adorable with his red hair and gorgeous blue eyes... I love you, and I'm so proud to be your mom, my Brycie Boy...my Baby Blue...my BABs...my Brycer...My Guy... With all the love in my heart, Mom.
Good Morning,

Wow... This sunshine is amazing. Did I say that already? If Bryce can... I know that he is the one who put in a special request for sunsine today. Well, there is to be a party on earth! And as I lay in bed this morning listening to the birds sing, I thought about the joyous party in heaven today! What a celebration it must be... And now, as I type about his celebration in heaven..."Legacy" starts to play on the radio... No coincidences, just signs from heaven... "Mommy, I'm here. I'm with you celebrating every step of the way. You're right, Mom. We are having a huge celebration in heaven today. I can't wait until you can see it all! You will LOVE it! I've been with you while you had visitors yesterday...I sent them! I was with you while you were making the food last night so that it would be even more delicious today! I was also with my dad in the tractor yesterday, and will be today too until he comes in for church and my party. I couldn't pass up time in the tractor with my dad... It's one of my most favorite places to be! Tell everyone HI and that I love them all! Tell them not to worry about me, I am in the BEST place ever! I am with Jesus... Love you, Mom and Dad." Those words came to me now, as if I should share them. So, there you have it. Some of Bryce's last words to us were, "Love you, Mom and Dad." He said them to us when we had all tucked ourselves into our bed. It was dark and quiet. He said them so soft and so sincere. Like he knew he should because it may be the last time... He appreciated everything that we did for him everyday. He loved all of us soooooo very much. If only you could have all known Bryce Andrew Breuer... By the way, he has been giving me many signs the last few days. I asked God if he could please do that. Thank you, God!!!

It was 5 years ago today, on a Sunday, that we had Bryce's 5th birthday party. He was adorable, as usual, smiling that glorious smile for every picture and for everyone. We told everyone that we were pregnant with our 5th child that day...crazy. My sister's were wondering about the bruising that Bryce had. I was worried someone might think we were hurting him. The bruises showed up so quickly. The next day, I took Bryce in for his 5 year old well-child check. They did blood tests and sent us to Rochester Mayo Clinic. Bryce was diagnosed with Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia. The blow that day was devastating and almost an in-shock kind of experience. But, it was nothing compared to the devastation we have experienced since then and feel now everyday... I still wonder why... Why Bryce? Why children? Why cancer? I do not believe that God gave Bryce cancer. He wouldn't want him suffering the way he did. God is good. We will never know truly what the plan is for our lives but I will always do my best to live up to God's plan in my life. And, in the end and everyday, I will always give God all the glory...

Now, on to the latest party update! At 2:45pm on Friday, I took a big John Deere birthday cake to school to share with Bryce's awesome classmates! It was so much fun! Grandma Linda and Ryan Alpers helped me out. Thanks so much guys! While we were all eating our cake, the Penny Challenge winners were announced. All of the elementary brought in loose change. Pennies add to the count. Silver coins take away. The class with the most money collected was the winner. They did this for Bryce and our family in 2004. Bryce loved it! This year they are doing it for a little girl in 5th grade who has some medical issues. Well, guess what?! You got it! The 4th grade class won!!! So imagine almost 50 ten year old bodies jumping up and down and screaming for joy! They won a root beer float party! After things calmed down, I asked Sam K. if he thought Bryce had anything to do with this. He gave his huge dimply smile! Then, the kids starting coming out of their classroom saying, "I bet Bryce helped us win!" All of the sudden I heard in my head, "Pennies from Heaven".

Pennies From Heaven

I found a penny today,
just laying on the ground.
But it is not just a penny,
this little coin I found.
Found pennies come from heaven,
thats what my Grandpa told me.
He said Angels toss then down,
oh how I loved that story.
He said when an Angel misses you,
they toss a penny down.
Sometimes just to cheer you up,
make a smile out of your frown.
So don't pass by that penny
when you're feeling blue.
It may be a penny from heaven,
that an Angel's tossed to you.
Author Unknown

How cool is that?! So, that was just a blast! Well, then we all went to church to carry on Bryce's legacy of giving to other's. We made 3 tie blankets for 3 very special kiddos! We also made prayer rocks for ourselves and the kiddos. They have butterflies and dragonflies on them. A few of the kids are leaving one at Bryce's grave for him...those would be the John Deere one's... It was so great spending time with Bryce's classmates, again! They are so great, and as I always say...God hand-picked each and every one of them... Spending time with them is healing power to me. Love it, love it, love it!

We want to thank everyone who has donated blood in Bryce's memory this past week. Because Bryce's birthday is on Sunday and sooooo many people need blood, I decided to extend it into this week, also! Please get out there and give life/blood. You can do it! Bryce will be with you the whole time! Mitchell asked me yesterday, "Can I give blood?" I told him I wasn't sure because he is only 13. I also told him that he has given so much already (but it doesn't stop there--which he knows) and that I am so proud of him. He gave his bone marrow and white cells to Bryce. I asked him if he would do it all over again, and without hesitation (and a little bit of a "Dah, Mom!" look), he said, "Yeah!" These children are our future... I'm trying to teach our children that it is better to give than it is to receive... So, please, please, please get out there and give blood this week! Don't forget to sign Bryce's memory sheet, if you go to Mayo Hilton Blood Bank! Their phone number is 507-284-4475. Appointments are great, but walk-in's are welcome! The Blood Bank loves and appreciates all of YOU for doing this! If you are not from the area, call your local Red Cross or clinic or hospital for information. Thank you from the bottom of a very grateful, mom's heart... I will get the tally to you this week. Again, I can feel Bryce's excitement inside of me. He wants as many people as possible to give, I just know it! And, thanks for forwarding out the challenge to your friends and family! Thank you so much for all of your efforts!!! And, don't forget to sign Bryce's guest book with your experience! I'm sure Bryce is beaming down from heaven with such pride.... I know from a personal perspective, as a mom of a very special child who lived longer because of many blood donor's in our lives,...You have a very special place in my heart. I am forever grateful to YOU!!! You never know how many of you actually shared your life/blood with our ~Brycer~ God bless you all!!!

Prayers still need to be said for little, Miss Melanie, whom I adore! You must go to her webpage and send her and her family prayers. Melanie's page is www.caringbridge.org/visit/melanie. And continue your prayers for our buddy, Isaac, who continues with his treatments and may be going into transplant. I will always believe God sends them "equipped"... Please pray for Isaac's complete healing. He loves racing so if there is anyone out there that can send him anything with NASCAR or other racing groups, please do so!! Or if you have items that you can send that he can give out to other children in the hospital, he would love it!!! His page is www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaachall. We just love these kids!!! Pray for their healing! We hate to see them suffer and endure what they do............ Also add Jamie O'Reilly and Katie O'Connor to your prayer lists. They are 2 really great mom's. Katie will be starting treatments soon. Jamie is finding out about areas of concern on her recent scans. I know that God is with them but we need to pray that they can feel that God is always with them. God is good, even in the times when He seems silent... Love and appreciation to all. Oh, and for the farmers out there, Tim and Dad finished planting corn last night and are starting to plant beans today. They have about 1,000 acres of beans to plant including custom work. I am always praying for their safety and guidance during their busy seasons. Again, hugs all around!

"Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted." Matthew 5:3-4

Please include these wonderful people who are fighting their own battles in your prayers:
www.caringbridge.org/mn/willcanan *Will is continuing on his chemo treatments for a brain tumor and is just an amazing kid!
Leann and Lisa who continue to fight and will also win their battles with the Lord by their side.

For my Brycer:
"To him who overcomes, I will give the right to eat from the tree of life, which is in the paradise of God." Revelation 2:7

"To the man who pleases Him, God gives wisdom, knowledge and happiness." Ecclesiastes 2:26

"Teach me to do Your will, for You are my God; may Your good Spirit lead me on level ground." Psalm 143:10

"I am the Way, the Truth, and the LIFE." John 14:6
**From Bryce's favorite Bible book marker which has Jesus' picture on the front.

"Walk by faith, not by sight." 2 Corin. 5:7
**Bryce's favorite!!!

"With God all things are possible." Matthew 19:26.
My favorite!

"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
Isaiah 41:10

"I will build them up and not tear them down; I will plant them and not uproot them. I will give them a heart to know me, that I am the Lord. They will be my people, and I will be their God." Jeremiah 24:6-7

"But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40:31

We've met many new faces on our son's journey with cancer. We feel the pain of many family's who also struggle with cancer or another life-threatening disease. Please say a prayer for all the little people on 3 Francis of St. Mary's Hospital. Pray for God's healing touch for each one of these children. Pray for strength for each of their family's. And, pray for those who have not yet placed their child in God's hands, to do so. They need to give Him all of the control. With God, we have everything. Without Him, we have nothing. Please continue to send out prayers for all those fighting their battles, like Will, Kristin, Kristina, Griffin, Jackson, Isaac, Melanie, Signe, Teagon, Rachel, Wes, Paul, Heidi, Ethan, Joe, Jamie, Nikki, Brock, Sierra, Ellen, Austin, Kat, Audrey, Barbara, Josh, Rian, & Alyssa. Pray for strength for all of the family's who have lost a loved one to cancer or another disease. These people are all so special to us!!! Give them strength, Lord, and give them peace within.

Take Care & God Bless~

The Breu Crew
Tim & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Tuesday, May 13, 2008 11:06 AM CDT
"Be strong and courageous and get to work. Don't be frightened by the size of the task, for the Lord my God is with you; He will not forsake you. He will see to it that everything is finished correctly." 1 Chronicles 28:20

"Be patient, then, brothers, until the Lord's coming. See how the farmer waits for the land to yield its valuable crop and how patient he is for the autumn and spring rains. You too, be patient and stand firm, because the Lord's coming is near." James 5:7-8
5/15/08 Update: Lana and I went to donate blood today at the Hilton. We asked the staff if anyone had donated in memory of Bryce. So, far they had 2 for sure but started a list now this morning for people to sign. We are extending the blood donor challenge through next week because Bryce would have wanted us to and because there is ALWAYS a need for blood donors!!! I can feel his excitement inside of me. He wants as many people as possible to give, I just know it! I've had many emails, too! Thanks so much for such a great response! So far from emails, we've got *Tried: 3, *Gave blood: 6, *Can't/yet: 5, and then 3 funny one's who don't mention if they are going to or not--they may be a little "flighty" like me and just forgot to mention it... And, thanks for forwarding out the challenge to your friends and family! If you are in the Rochester area, the Hilton Blood Bank is 507-284-4475 for appointments. They do accept walk-ins. Like I said, they are now keeping a tally of donor's in memory of Bryce. So, please sign that sheet when you go! I also asked them if they could find out how many transfusions Bryce had during his journey. They will call me with his total transfusion number. Any guesses out there? He received transfusions for almost 4 years...hhmmmm. If you are out of our area, get ahold of your local Red Cross or local clinic or hospital. Again, thank you so much for all of your efforts!!! And, don't forget to sign the guest book with your experience! I'm sure Bryce is beaming down from heaven with such pride... By the way, Lana and I were not able to give blood because both of our hemoglobins are not in the donating range...too low. That would explain why we are so tired...haha. No worries, we will try again after eating foods high in iron! Love and gratitude to all!
P.S. The Blood Bank loves and appreciates all of YOU for doing this! I know from a personal perspective, as a mom of a very special child who lived longer because of many blood donor's in our lives,...You have a very special place in my heart. I am forever grateful to YOU!!! You never know how many of you actually shared your life/blood with our ~Brycer~ God bless you all!!!
Good Morning,

I wanted to wish all the Mom's out there a Happy Mother's Day--only I'm a few days late... Just think of it as, "Everyday is Mother's Day!!" Haha. We wish!!! It's the BEST "job" in the world. It's where we grow in our weakest moments, and we sing in the victories. But, I truly believe with all my heart that the most important parts of being a mom is sharing unconditional love, teaching about the Lord and His many gifts in life, and preparing them for life and the life lessons that will be placed before them so that they can survive with God by their side. It's a fine line... When to do and give more and when to let them do it on their own and gain knowledge and experience. A mom's prayer life is soooo important... We must pray for guidance and to listen to God's words. To simply take the time to pray is huge! My prayers are for all the mom's in this crazy world... I hope you all have a wonderful week!!!

I thought I would update today...on a good day. Yeah for me! I woke up on Mother's Day and said some prayers in bed. I remembered how Bryce played "Brave" for me the moment I came downstairs last year on Mother's Day...maybe he was reminding me this Mother's Day...hmmm. Well, later when I was kissing the boys goodbye and telling them to be good at Sunday School, "Brave" started playing on the radio. My belief is that that is Bryce's way of saying "Happy Mother's Day, Mom!!!" He was so great at making me feel like the queen of the house! He was so good at making other's feel good... I carried his Mother's Day card around in my purse that day. I would look at it every once in a while. I love hearing him say "Susie Breuer" over and over in my head. He said my name soooo cute! I love thinking back to him plopping himself on my lap in the mornings and snuggling into me. I try so hard to feel his sweet kiss on my right cheek, like he always did. And now, as I feel tingling on my right cheek, I can't help but wonder if he is kissing it as I type. This brings me to tears... Thank you, God, for the gift of time with our loved one's. Please Lord forgive us when we abuse and misuse this time...this precious gift. We praise you, God, for the many gifts that you have placed in our lives. You are our God of hope. Everyday I cling to that HOPE that you place in my heart. Every week, I have a focus on one thing in particular... This week my focus is on Jesus. Thank you Lord for promising me NEW LIFE through Your son, Jesus.

As I told you all last week, Bryce's birthday is on Sunday, May 18th. He would have been 10 years old. I have a challenge for everyone in memory of my Brycer. I challenge our Bryce Backer's to have at least 10 of us (because he would have been 10) give blood this week!!! I will be one of the 10--hopefully many, many more! There are people out there who are fighting their battles and need transfusions, just like Bryce did. He would want us to rally the troops to give blood for other's! Please spread the word. And when you give, tell the staff that it is in memory of Bryce Breuer, then leave a message in Bryce's guestbook that you did so. Remember when Tracy Idler challenged all of us to do this? Bryce was soooooo proud of everyone! He was so pleased with everyone's efforts! He also loved the funny stories...especially Camie's. I can still see him tilting his head down and shaking it with a smirk, "Ti, what's so hard about giving blood? I do it all the time!" In his next breath, he knew the anxiety that came with it at times... He totally understood. But, he always got to use EMLA (numbing) cream, lucky duck! Let's do this for Bryce and the many other's who don't get to choose their paths... Giving blood is saving lives... Take the time and step out of your comfort zone! And, thank you in advance from Bryce and the Breu Crew!!!

Prayers still need to be said for little, Miss Melanie, whom I adore! You must go to her webpage and send her and her family prayers. Melanie's page is www.caringbridge.org/visit/melanie. And continue your prayers for our buddy, Isaac, who continues with his treatments and may be going into transplant. I will always believe God sends them "equipped"... Please pray for Isaac's complete healing. He loves racing so if there is anyone out there that can send him anything with NASCAR or other racing groups, please do so!! Or if you have items that you can send that he can give out to other children in the hospital, he would love it!!! His page is www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaachall. We just love these kids!!! Pray for their healing! We hate to see them suffer and endure what they do............ Also add Jamie O'Reilly and Katie O'Connor to your prayer lists. They are 2 really great mom's. Katie will be starting treatments soon. Jamie is finding out about areas of concern on her recent scans. I know that God is with them but we need to pray that they can feel that God is always with them. God is good, even in the times when He seems silent... Love and appreciation to all. Oh, and for the farmers out there, Tim and Dad finished planting corn last night and are starting to plant beans today. They have about 1,000 acres of beans to plant including custom work. I am always praying for their safety and guidance during their busy seasons. Again, hugs all around!

"Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted." Matthew 5:3-4

Please include these wonderful people who are fighting their own battles in your prayers:
www.caringbridge.org/mn/willcanan *Will is continuing on his chemo treatments for a brain tumor and is just an amazing kid!
Leann and Lisa who continue to fight and will also win their battles with the Lord by their side.

For my Brycer:
"To him who overcomes, I will give the right to eat from the tree of life, which is in the paradise of God." Revelation 2:7

"To the man who pleases Him, God gives wisdom, knowledge and happiness." Ecclesiastes 2:26

"Teach me to do Your will, for You are my God; may Your good Spirit lead me on level ground." Psalm 143:10

"I am the Way, the Truth, and the LIFE." John 14:6
**From Bryce's favorite Bible book marker which has Jesus' picture on the front.

"Walk by faith, not by sight." 2 Corin. 5:7
**Bryce's favorite!!!

"With God all things are possible." Matthew 19:26.
My favorite!

"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
Isaiah 41:10

"I will build them up and not tear them down; I will plant them and not uproot them. I will give them a heart to know me, that I am the Lord. They will be my people, and I will be their God." Jeremiah 24:6-7

"But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40:31

We've met many new faces on our son's journey with cancer. We feel the pain of many family's who also struggle with cancer or another life-threatening disease. Please say a prayer for all the little people on 3 Francis of St. Mary's Hospital. Pray for God's healing touch for each one of these children. Pray for strength for each of their family's. And, pray for those who have not yet placed their child in God's hands, to do so. They need to give Him all of the control. With God, we have everything. Without Him, we have nothing. Please continue to send out prayers for all those fighting their battles, like Will, Kristin, Kristina, Griffin, Jackson, Isaac, Melanie, Signe, Teagon, Rachel, Wes, Paul, Heidi, Ethan, Joe, Jamie, Nikki, Brock, Sierra, Ellen, Austin, Kat, Audrey, Barbara, Josh, Rian, & Alyssa. Pray for strength for all of the family's who have lost a loved one to cancer or another disease. These people are all so special to us!!! Give them strength, Lord, and give them peace within.

Take Care & God Bless~

The Breu Crew
Tim & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Monday, May 5, 2008 2:25 PM CDT
"Be strong and courageous and get to work. Don't be frightened by the size of the task, for the Lord my God is with you; He will not forsake you. He will see to it that everything is finished correctly." 1 Chronicles 28:20

"Be patient, then, brothers, until the Lord's coming. See how the farmer waits for the land to yield its valuable crop and how patient he is for the autumn and spring rains. You too, be patient and stand firm, because the Lord's coming is near." James 5:7-8

Good Afternoon,

Hurray for warmer weather in MN! It is suppose to get up to 70 degrees today. The boys have enjoyed playing outside lately...when it's not raining... Tim got into the field for the first time on May 1st. He is now in the field for the second time which is today!!! Pray for patience and for the weather to cooperate. I don't have a doubt in my mind that Tim and his dad will get all the planting done, and it will be a great year with the crops! It's all about ATTITUDE, right?! Tim does truly miss his farming buddy, Bryce... It's really a difficult time for him. Please pray for all of his time in the tractor and truck while his thoughts are consumed with Bryce. I know he regrets that he couldn't "fix" him... He's the fixer of the family. I am the nurturer. I often wonder if I gave Bryce enough of my one-on-one attention and comforted him enough as his mother... It's easier said than done not having regrets or feelings of guilt. What makes it worse is that you can never actually/physically make it up to him again. I know he is in heaven. I know he has forgiven us--if there is anything that needs forgiveness. I know that there is only love... The accepting that your child has passed away and you won't hug him again until you arrive at heaven's gates is so hard to accept because you don't want to accept it--mentally. But, as each day passes by, you realize that time continues to go on with or without him. Everyone goes on with their normal/daily lives... We must move on with our new normal--which frankly, somedays, really stinks to know Bryce isn't here to share it with us. I can't believe it has been one year and 2 1/2 months since we last held him... Where has the time gone?... Hug your kids. Hug your parents. Hug your grandparents. Hug your friends. Hug a stranger who needs a hug. Keep your eyes open to who God places in your path that needs you today. Life is so very precious..........

Wow. I hadn't planned on getting that deep right away in my entry. But, you all know me...more serious and open to talk than actually funny...I wish I was funny! God must have thought I could work on that later in life...bummer. So, I hope everyone is doing well. As always, we appreciate all of your prayers and support. God has truly blessed us with all of you! I must start right away with continued prayer support for 2 children!!! Little Melanie and Isaac... Melanie lives in Rochester and is the sweetest little girl... She endures so much constant medical invasion in her life and never complains. She endures more than Bryce did, and reminds me of Bryce with her wisdom beyond her years... Her mother is a saint on earth. Amber is amazing. She leaves me speechless, which is amazing in itself! I ask you for prayer support for Melanie's health, for Amber's constant caring for Melanie plus Amber's healing of her wrist. I ask you to also nomitate them for the Extreme Home Makeover which will be coming to Rochester. I won't say much accept for the fact that I've met MANY, MANY family's along this journey and NO OTHER FAMILY IS MORE DESERVING THAN THE GATES FAMILY FOR THIS REWARD!!!! Please everyone!!!! Please go to this link and nominate them! Here's how to do it:

1. Send an email to Quentin Strack at emheminnesota@gmail.com

2. Enter "Gates Family" in your subject line

3. Write a short paragraph telling ABC why you think they deserve an extreme home makeover or simply cut and paste the paragraph below into the body of your email.

4. Sign your name, city, and state at the end of the email

They are currently living in a trailer that is filled with Melanie's medical supplies. Her body temperature must be watched carefully. Amber came to the PITC with a basket of "support" for Bryce and our family in his last month of his life on earth. She constantly gives to others and never expects anything in return. She also came with Melanie to the Carnival of Love in July '06. Again, I won't say more...please just vote for them! Melanie's page is www.caringbridge.org/visit/melanie.

Our buddy, Isaac, continues on his treatments for his relapsed leukemia. He is out in Nebraska. He too came to the Carnival of Love to meet Bryce. He also has an amazing family. These children are such amazing kids... Isaac's attitude is so incredible! He always has a smile on his face, is willing to do what he needs to do to get better, and is constantly giving to others!!! He reminds me so much of Bryce. I do believe God sends them "equipped"... Please pray for Isaac's complete healing. He loves racing so if there is anyone out there that can send him anything with NASCAR or other racing groups, please do so!! Or if you have items that you can send that he can give out to other children in the hospital, he would love it!!! His page is www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaachall. We just love these kids!!! Pray for their healing! We hate to see them suffer and endure what they do............

We've had lots of stuff going on here. Mitchell has been having a few of his non-rained out baseball games. We've been to a few MN Twin's games. Remember last year for my birtday how we took our boys and Bryce's buddies to a Twin's game? It was a blast! Well, this year, they decided to surprise ME! They got us 12 tickets to the Twin's game on April 20th. So, we took our boys (not Ethan) and Bryce's buddies again! It was so much fun!!! That morning of my birthday, I was a little down and thinking, "It's my 2nd (year) birthday without my Brycer. What was it like last year? Oh yeah, I was soooo sad without his full attention of spoiling me rotten..." Then, I remembered going to the Twin's game with all the boys and smiled thinking, "That was so much fun!" Well, low and behold, who shows up after school but some of the buddies! Surprise! I loved it! I also got a surprise from Ryan Alpers, Bryce's buddy. He went to the Jeremy Camp, Toby Mac, and Matthew West concert on March 1 with Garett. I was so bummed to miss it, but guess what? They brought me back a Jeremy Camp t-shirt that has footprints on it from front to back and it says, "I will walk by Faith" on the front, and "Not by Sight" on the back. It's my new favorite t-shirt! Bryce would have LOVED it!!! Thanks to all the buddies and their family's for the tickets and the t-shirt!!! You are the BEST!!!! Oh, by the way, we saw an Eagle on the way up, AND we had an Eagle fly directly over us on the way home!!! So cool!!! AND...Ryan Alpers stayed over night the night before the game. When I tucked him and Logan in to bed, I came downstairs to hear Michael W. Smith's song "Friends" playing on the radio! I rarely hear that song... It is the song that always reminds me of Ryan because he always sings it for Bryce (remember Bryce's memorial service?). So, I just had to go upstairs and tell them... I knew it was a sign from Bryce. Well, when we met Ryan's mom, Jodie, after the game, we were both driving off and I found Ryan's cap in our car. So, I grabbed it and ran it back to them. I could hear Jodie squealing... When I got to their van, she was cranking up the radio to "Friends" and said, "I never hear this song on the radio!!!" I looked at Ryan and he was just smiling away......... Again, soooooo cool.....

Bryce's birthday is May 18th. He would have been 10 years old this year. His buddies mom's have decided to celebrate it annually by carrying on Bryce's legacy of compassion and giving to other's. The mom's and I met last night and cut blankets for tie blankets for other's. We are really excited! We will meet with Bryce's classmates to tie these blankets and make Prayer Rocks on the May 16th after school. Then, we will be sending the blankets to some special people. Again, we are so very excited to be doing something for other's... His classmates planted, in Bryce's memory, a Red Sugar Maple tree at Rosie's Park in Goodhue on Arbor Day--last Friday. The leaves will turn orange in the fall, so they thought that would be perfect! They have decided to take a picture by it every year--with their Senior Class picture being by it which will be in their Senior Yearbook. How awesome is that?!!!! Here is the link to an article on it in the Rochester Post Bulletin: http://www.postbulletin.com/newsmanager/?a=339449&z=2
Thanks to Bryce's classmates and to the Goodhue County Soil and Water Conservation District for donating the tree in Bryce's memory.

I met with the Peds Chaplain at St. Mary's, a Social Worker, and a Child Life Specialist on April 25th. We discussed what could be done to help other family's who are enduring the pain and sadness that we have endured with the final diagnosis and loss of a child. I prayed for God to give me the words, to help me keep my composure, and to not hold any important feelings back for fear of what they would think of me. Let me just tell you that GOD ANSWERS PRAYERS... The meeting went very well. I was honest, fought back the tears, and my final thought was to tell them to get the ball rolling. It's already been long overdue. Praise God for His healing powers. This brings healing to me...every little bit helps! I am also going to help them with the Remembrance Ceremony that Mayo holds in November. I may also be speaking to staff about how to help family's in these situations. It's all still in the works but I am praying that I can continue to help other's who are grieving and that maybe, just maybe, this too is part of my PURPOSE for God. I would be so honored to do this for Him... I would appreciate your prayers on these situations and I would also appreciate you praying for the family's who are dealing with situations like these... We know to well their pain. And, it doesn't get better real quickly, even though you wish so badly that it would. Ethan has been talking about Bryce still a lot lately. He misses him so much. The brothers are all doing pretty good. I know that they may help with these causes also, we'll see what the future holds. You just never know what God has in-store for you, too...

Last Friday night, we spent the night at Nyla and little Ellen's home--my squishy girl! It was wonderful to see them! The boys are so busy, it's almost like they are not there! It's wonderful... This week is filled with 3 home games for Mitchell, Tim in the field, and who knows what else. I went with Joel on his MN Zoo trip last Thursday. It was great to have one-on-one time with him. The morning of the trip, I heard "Friends" on the radio and thought with a smile, "Wow. I get to hear this awesome song." Well, then it came to the crescendo part of the song in the chorus and I had a flashback with lots of tears. When Tom helped me put together the dvd of Bryce for the memorial service, that crescendo part was when we were at the MN Zoo for his 8th birthday, and Bryce sent the dolphins over to get all of his classmates wet. He laughed sooooo hard!!! Well, guess what? Joel and I went to the dolphin show that day and it hit me... The last time I was there was with Bryce and I flashbacked that same memory again!!! I think Bryce was telling me that morning, "Remember that day, Mom? It was so much fun!" Wow...

So, on to my final piece. When you lose a child, you pray and pray and pray that you will get a "visit" from your child... Some people get those visits from loved one's. Two nights before my birthday, I told God, "I don't need anything for my birthday. But, please could I just have a dream with Bryce in it?" Those dreams are rare... That night I woke up to feeling my 'Carnival of Love' and 'Playstrong' bracelets being turned back to the correct side. ***These were Bryce's own bracelets that when he was losing so much weight, he asked me to put on the table. I asked if I could wear them and with a little hesitation, he agreed. I don't ever take them off. He never liked it when they twisted.*** I remember laying there with my eyes closed because I didn't want him to stop touching and fixing them. I really don't care if anyone thinks I'm crazy... I truly believe with all my heart that it was Bryce... It was so real... I couldn't believe it myself! When it stopped, I finally opened my eyes to see what time it was--to "document" it. It was 3:24 am. I remember thinking, "It would have been even more amazing if it had been 3:33." Well, one night last week or the week before, I had a dream about Bryce. It was very short and I didn't even see his face. The doctors we tapping his tummy, like they always did. I woke up and opened my eyes. Bryce's presence was sooooooo strong in the room, I knew he was there!!! I looked at the clock and it was ......... 3:33 am......... I dozed off and on that night and each time I woke up, I could still feel his presence there very strongly until the morning when I woke up to get up. THANK YOU, GOD......

Again, hug your children. Even in the tough times and struggles, try to remember how precious life is... We miss Bryce almost more now than we EVER have... God WILL get us through this. And, as always, WE WILL GIVE GOD ALL THE GLORY!!! Thanks to Nyla for the beautiful and personal Nyla/Nicole Nordeman concert on Saturday morning. Especially "Legacy"...... Thanks to Sarah L. for the awesome plaque, "Worry about nothing. Pray about everything." Love it, love it, love it!!! Thanks to everyone I have forgotten to thank here... I love and appreciate each and every one of YOU!!! God bless you all.

"Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted." Matthew 5:3-4

Please include these wonderful people who are fighting their own battles in your prayers:
www.caringbridge.org/mn/willcanan (Clear Scans! Wahoo!)
Leann and Lisa who continue to fight and will also win their battles with the Lord by their side.

For my Brycer:
"To him who overcomes, I will give the right to eat from the tree of life, which is in the paradise of God." Revelation 2:7

"To the man who pleases Him, God gives wisdom, knowledge and happiness." Ecclesiastes 2:26

"Teach me to do Your will, for You are my God; may Your good Spirit lead me on level ground." Psalm 143:10

"I am the Way, the Truth, and the LIFE." John 14:6
**From Bryce's favorite Bible book marker which has Jesus' picture on the front.

"Walk by faith, not by sight." 2 Corin. 5:7
**Bryce's favorite!!!

"With God all things are possible." Matthew 19:26.
My favorite!

"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
Isaiah 41:10

"I will build them up and not tear them down; I will plant them and not uproot them. I will give them a heart to know me, that I am the Lord. They will be my people, and I will be their God." Jeremiah 24:6-7

"But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40:31

We've met many new faces on our son's journey with cancer. We feel the pain of many family's who also struggle with cancer or another life-threatening disease. Please say a prayer for all the little people on 3 Francis of St. Mary's Hospital. Pray for God's healing touch for each one of these children. Pray for strength for each of their family's. And, pray for those who have not yet placed their child in God's hands, to do so. They need to give Him all of the control. With God, we have everything. Without Him, we have nothing. Please continue to send out prayers for all those fighting their battles, like Will, Kristin, Kristina, Griffin, Jackson, Isaac, Melanie, Signe, Teagon, Rachel, Wes, Paul, Heidi, Ethan, Joe, Jamie, Nikki, Brock, Sierra, Ellen, Austin, Kat, Audrey, Barbara, Josh, Rian, & Alyssa. Pray for strength for all of the family's who have lost a loved one to cancer or another disease. These people are all so special to us!!! Give them strength, Lord, and give them peace within.

Take Care & God Bless~

The Breu Crew
Tim & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Thursday, April 10, 2008 9:10 AM CDT
"Be strong and courageous and get to work. Don't be frightened by the size of the task, for the Lord my God is with you; He will not forsake you. He will see to it that everything is finished correctly." 1 Chronicles 28:20

"Be patient, then, brothers, until the Lord's coming. See how the farmer waits for the land to yield its valuable crop and how patient he is for the autumn and spring rains. You too, be patient and stand firm, because the Lord's coming is near." James 5:7-8

Good Morning,

I hope everyone is doing well. We sure are ready for spring growth here in Minnesota... Something to pick us all up and renew our energy. Spring just does that to a person! And now, we have winter weather warnings for Thursday through Saturday. Crazy. But, that's MN! I do hear the birds singing outside this morning, what a welcomed sound that is. I'm sorry for the huge delay this time in updates in Bryce's journal. I have figured out (a long time ago) that I'm not sure if anyone could truly be prepared for the reality rollercoaster ride of grief. Don't get me wrong, this is not a pity-party. Actually, I have wanted to update for a very long time. Part of my delay is because we were in Hawaii at my brother, Chris' home for 2 weeks in March. The other part of the delay is the sadness that overcomes me from missing my Brycer. As many parents know, your children are a HUGE part of your life...no matter how many children you have. Saying "See ya soon" to one and then, keeping busy with the other's, does not ease the pain or loneliness from the hole left in your heart that was created on the day of his passing into his new life. As sweet and precious and challenging as life is...God never said it would be easy. God is our refuge and our strength. He is our ever-present help in our times of need. He, and our brother Jesus, will be the only way to get through this. You are all included on this journey for our healing. I truly believe God sends you when He knows we need you most. If only every one of you could know all of our testimonies of His presence in our lives BECAUSE OF ALL OF YOU!!! You play a huge role in God's daily work... I know and understand that many of you continue to pray for our family, and we truly appreciate that. We still have a long road ahead of us. It's true...You don't know what you've got until it's gone. We knew how amazing and incredible Bryce was, but now when we look back, we remember and recognize so many things that were a testimony to Bryce's faith and trust in God. Last night, Tim and I were talking and we remembered how Tim had asked Bryce once, "Do you just want to scream and release some anger for all of this cancer?" And Bryce's remark was, "Why? What good would that do?" We knew what he meant..."That is not what is going to heal me. God is... I place my trust in God." Do you know how many times Tim and I have screamed?????? We are adults and that is what we needed to do at those times. Bryce was a precious, innocent, pure Child of God...there was no need to scream. You've just got to love the innocent faith and trust in God of a child... There's no "reality" sneaking in to cloud your dreams. Just pureness... Thank you, God, for the life-lessons that Bryce taught us here on earth... Hold onto those life-lessons with all of your heart. God wants us to have the faith of a child. God wants us to believe and trust in Him. I truly do with all of my heart...

So, thanks for letting me have my therapy session there. Hawaii was wonderful... The boys loved the time with their cousins and the waves at the beaches. I loved spending time with my husband and my boys'!!! I also loved spending time with my brother, sister-in-law, neice and nephews. It was relaxing, fun, and full of God's majesty and creations. Wow... We had signs from Bryce right from the beginning. We saw an eagle on the way to the airport the day we flew out. My mom called and told me about her friend, Rosella's, dream: She was at our house and knew she was with Bryce by his red hair and freckles. Bryce wanted to show her the flowers that Grandma Ann had planted. Then, he showed her where Grandma was going to put a huge smiley face on our old garage by the road. He was so happy and looked so good. Then, he left and she woke up. Rosella told my mom about the dream. My mom never told Rosella that she wanted to paint a smiley face on the old garage, and Bryce had already passed away when mom mentioned she wanted to do it, so Bryce didn't know this when he was here on earth. I truly believe that Bryce was sending a message through to Grandma Ann. Pretty cool, isn't it?! Another story, we went to a temple in Honolulu for a tour and they showed us a video about Jesus working in your life. It was about 2 grandparents who had passed away. The little boy had red hair, just like Bryce's. The little girl had freckles, just like Bryce's. It was crazy! The boys and I loved that message. A different day, we went to a Pineapple Plantation, and when we were buying tickets to go through the pineapple maze, Joel heard the lady's radio in the back softly playing Nichole Nordeman's song "Holy". Another day, we met a wonderful woman on the beach who was originally from MN. We got to talking and she told us that she has relapsed with her cancer a 4th time and is choosing to do no further treatments. That was a total God moment, too. Cynthia, if you are checking in on us. It was a pleasure to meet you that day on the beach. You are amazing!!! And finally, (yet I know there were more signs, I forgot to write them all down)...while we were at the Los Angeles airport looking for food quick before our flight back to MN...who did we run into???????? Nyla and Tom Hagen!!!!! Ellen's parents'.... Nyla and I have become so close through our journey's with our children that I can truly say she is a very close friend of mine for life. What are the chances????????????? God knew that we would share our testimonies of how He is working in our lives so He brought us together AGAIN!...In LA!!!!...on the same flight home!!! Soooooo crazy.... And last but not least, as we were riding home on the airplane, the pilot told us we would be flying over Las Vegas, Nevada and then over the BRYCE CANYON in Utah!!!!!!!! Do you think our Brycer wanted us to know that he is still with us, or what?????!!!!! Praise God for His goodness and mercy at every perfect moment. We need to believe!!! We need to give God all the glory!!! Where are you today? Say a special prayer of thanks to God today for his goodness and mercy in your life. Thank Him for your family, your friends, your everything. Wait patiently on Him. His plan is far more perfect than our's... I know that God will bring so much good from our loss of our son. We just need to hold on tight to His love and His promises. Holdfast...whatever you may have going on in your life... Holdfast.

We have prayers that need to be said for our little friend, Isaac Hall. He was diagnosed with Leukemia when Bryce relapsed in Sept. '05. He went into remission, then. He relapsed in his CNS (central nervous system--spinal fluid) and went into remission, again. And now in March, he has relapsed in his bone marrow and CNS. He is such an amazing little boy!!! He reminds me so much of Bryce. He gives to so many, not even knowing he is... He and his family came all the way from Nebraska to go to the Carnival of Love and meet Bryce. They came out to our house afterward. His parents, Travis and Carla, are awesome. Please, please, please if I could just have one more huge request....it would be to support this family and this little boy in prayer and messages to his guestbook. And one more huge request would be to send messages to little Melanie who is truly stronger than many adults on this earth. She has so many medical issues and continues on by God's grace. Her mother is so-close to a saint...and I'm not kidding. Please flood these 2 little children with prayers for healing and their family's for strength. Flood them with messages of HOPE. We all need HOPE... God is our HOPE for today, tomorrow, and every day after that. Never lose HOPE!!! God will bring all of us JOY and PEACE by serving others for His purpose... Their caringbridge addresses are below the next Bible scripture. Thank you from a very grateful heart. And one final PRAISE GOD!!!... For the clear scans for our friends Will Canan and Rachel Tweeten!!! We are so absolutely thrilled that they are healing and continuing their purpose here on earth. God be with all of these people, big and little, who also have the nasty after-effects of chemo and radiation they have endured during their treatments. Pray for their continued healing. And, say a prayer for those who have said "See ya Soon" to a loved one and now wait patiently on the Lord. We love you all......................

P.S. Tim and I and the brothers' would love to hear about any memories of or signs from our Brycer from you, if you would share. We miss him soooooo incredibly bad again... Please share.

"Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted." Matthew 5:3-4

Please include these wonderful children of God who are fighting their own battles in your prayers:
www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaachall (He has relapsed leukemia and is fighting his battle. His strength and determination is so strong! He's alot like Bryce...)
www.caringbridge.org/visit/melanie (Such an incredible little girl with so many medical issues, bless her precious heart... Her mother is so amazing!)
www.caringbridge.org/mn/willcanan (Clear Scans! Wahoo!)
Leann and Lisa who continue to fight and will also win their battles with the Lord by their side.

For my Brycer:
"To him who overcomes, I will give the right to eat from the tree of life, which is in the paradise of God." Revelation 2:7

"To the man who pleases Him, God gives wisdom, knowledge and happiness." Ecclesiastes 2:26

"Teach me to do Your will, for You are my God; may Your good Spirit lead me on level ground." Psalm 143:10

"I am the Way, the Truth, and the LIFE." John 14:6
**From Bryce's favorite Bible book marker which has Jesus' picture on the front.

"Walk by faith, not by sight." 2 Corin. 5:7
**Bryce's favorite!!!

"With God all things are possible." Matthew 19:26.
My favorite!

"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
Isaiah 41:10

"I will build them up and not tear them down; I will plant them and not uproot them. I will give them a heart to know me, that I am the Lord. They will be my people, and I will be their God." Jeremiah 24:6-7

"But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40:31

We've met many new faces on our son's journey with cancer. We feel the pain of many family's who also struggle with cancer or another life-threatening disease. Please say a prayer for all the little people on 3 Francis of St. Mary's Hospital. Pray for God's healing touch for each one of these children. Pray for strength for each of their family's. And, pray for those who have not yet placed their child in God's hands, to do so. They need to give Him all of the control. With God, we have everything. Without Him, we have nothing. Please continue to send out prayers for all those fighting their battles, like Will, Kristin, Kristina, Griffin, Jackson, Isaac, Melanie, Signe, Teagon, Rachel, Wes, Paul, Heidi, Ethan, Joe, Jamie, Nikki, Brock, Sierra, Ellen, Austin, Kat, Audrey, Barbara, Josh, Rian, & Alyssa. Pray for strength for all of the family's who have lost a loved one to cancer or another disease. These people are all so special to us!!! Give them strength, Lord, and give them peace within.

Take Care & God Bless~

The Breu Crew
Tim & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Sunday, March 23, 2008 6:00 AM CDT
"Be strong and courageous and get to work. Don't be frightened by the size of the task, for the Lord my God is with you; He will not forsake you. He will see to it that everything is finished correctly." 1 Chronicles 28:20

For my Brycer:
"To him who overcomes, I will give the right to eat from the tree of life, which is in the paradise of God." Revelation 2:7

"To the man who pleases Him, God gives wisdom, knowledge and happiness." Ecclesiastes 2:26

"Teach me to do Your will, for You are my God; may Your good Spirit lead me on level ground." Psalm 143:10

Good Morning & Easter Blessings to You~

It is the most awesome and incredible Christian season of all--to me anyway. It is Easter morning... This is our proof and praise that we will be reunited with our Brycer once again at heaven's gates!!! Praise be to God... Thank you, Jesus, for saving us! Thank you, God, for the gift of Eternal Life! Celebrate this most incredible day today!

I am coming to you to ask you to say many powerful prayers for Jim Berg today and in the many days ahead. His wife, Barb, passed away yesterday. The victory is won. It is God and Barb's alone. Now, Jim must begin his "new normal" which we know all to well... Pray for his healing, his continued trust in God's plan and purpose in his life, and his peace within. Barb's page is www.caringbridge.org/visit/barbberg. Thank you and God bless you all. More to come later in the week.

"Be strong and let us fight bravely for our people and the cities of our God. The Lord will do what is good in his sight." 1 Chronicles 19:13

Please include these awesome servants for the Lord in your prayers:
Will: www.caringbridge.org/mn/willcanan. He is going through treatments again for his relapsed brain tumor. What a trooper! We adore him!!! He is Bryce's age.
Leann and Lisa who continue to fight and will also win their battles with the Lord by their side.

"I am the Way, the Truth, and the LIFE." John 14:6
**From Bryce's favorite Bible book marker which has Jesus' picture on the front.

"Walk by faith, not by sight." 2 Corin. 5:7
**Bryce's favorite!!!

"With God all things are possible." Matthew 19:26.
My favorite!

"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
Isaiah 41:10

"I will build them up and not tear them down; I will plant them and not uproot them. I will give them a heart to know me, that I am the Lord. They will be my people, and I will be their God." Jeremiah 24:6-7

"But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40:31

We've met many new faces on our son's journey with cancer. We feel the pain of many family's who also struggle with cancer or another life-threatening disease. Please say a prayer for all the little people on 3 Francis of St. Mary's Hospital. Pray for God's healing touch for each one of these children. Pray for strength for each of their family's. And, pray for those who have not yet placed their child in God's hands, to do so. They need to give Him all of the control. With God, we have everything. Without Him, we have nothing. Please continue to send out prayers for all those fighting their battles, like Will, Kristin, Kristina, Griffin, Jackson, Isaac, Melanie, Signe, Teagon, Rachel, Wes, Paul, Heidi, Ethan, Joe, Jamie, Nikki, Brock, Sierra, Ellen, Austin, Kat, Audrey, Barbara, Josh, Rian, & Alyssa. Pray for strength for all of the family's who have lost a loved one to cancer or another disease. These people are all so special to us!!! Give them strength, Lord, and give them peace within.

Take Care & God Bless~

The Breu Crew
Tim & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Friday, March 7, 2008 10:29 PM CST
"Be strong and courageous and get to work. Don't be frightened by the size of the task, for the Lord my God is with you; He will not forsake you. He will see to it that everything is finished correctly." 1 Chronicles 28:20

For my Brycer:
"To him who overcomes, I will give the right to eat from the tree of life, which is in the paradise of God." Revelation 2:7

"To the man who pleases Him, God gives wisdom, knowledge and happiness." Ecclesiastes 2:26

"Teach me to do Your will, for You are my God; may Your good Spirit lead me on level ground." Psalm 143:10

Good evening,

Here we are again and it's been almost 2 weeks. Sorry! Some of these days just plug away quickly. You know how it is. I have to say that I, personally, have been doing a little better. I think Tim and the brothers are too. I am not sure if it was Bryce's one year heavenly birthday celebration with Bryce's family and buddies that got me through it or what. I kinda got real sad last night, again. Tim and I shared some memories of our incredible son and cried together. It's so not easy to know that you will not hold your child or see him again until the day that you arrive at heaven's gates. I am certain I will see him, I am just not certain when...and that's part of the struggle. I do know and trust that it will all be in God's perfect timing. Bryce finished his purpose for God on earth. Now, he fulfills his purpose in heaven. I believe he is here with us many times a day. God is so good. This morning I went 'down' again and was "just sad". You know how sometimes you can get grumpy or lazy and wonder what is going on? Well, this morning I was nothing but sad. But, I got through it with a phone call that God sent from Lana. God always knows...

Did I ever share with you what Bryce's Sunday School teacher told me about the Hangman game story? Well, one Sunday morning, just before Bryce's final relapse--I believe it would have been November '06. She remembered that Bryce was having some pain in his back... Bryce's class had some spare time at the end of the class to play Hangman. Bryce was one of the last one's to give his words. Well, class finished but they hadn't finished Bryce's Hangman. She quickly said to him, "Bryce would you fill in your letters so that we can know what your Hangman was?" He looked at her like 'Ok, but I gotta go with my friends.' So, he quickly filled in his letters and took off up the stairs to go to church. She looked at his paper which read:

I am the luckiest boy in the world.

Can you believe it? He was in so much pain and had been through so much already but still was 'the luckiest boy in the world'... That was his attitude in life... I just wanted you to know Bryce a little bit more... Thanks for listening.

We went to see Ryan (our cousin) at the hospital again tonight. The boys were so happy to see him. It was the 2nd time I had seen him. He is doing so great! Thank you to those of you who have checked in on him and signed his guestbook. Ryan's family is so full of faith and trusting in God. Ryan will pull through this with grace and tenacity. God is guiding them through this new journey. Now, it's almost just a wait-and-see time to see what God has in-store for Ryan's purpose for Him. God is so good. Please continue to send out prayers for Ryan's healing and trust in the Lord. He has a Care Page at www.carepages.com, and then his page name is RDBuck. He is a wonderful person...

Now for my Bryce signs... Last Thursday, I was in Red Wing at the Women's Expo for my Mary Kay. I was so excited to see that I could buy a nummy apple pie from Perkin's for my boys for only $5!!! I knew that they would be so excited!--Why did I eat most of it, then?! So a few minutes later, I was looking through my Expo bag and found a MN Twin's 2008 schedule!!! I quickly asked my friends if I could have their schedules...now my big boys would each have a schedule of their own!!! Wow...2 awesome gifts for my boys...to us anyway...it's the little things that count! So then, the Tupperware lady walks up to us and asks if we would like to have a 'citrus pealer'! Are you kidding me???? YOU BET I WOULD!!! You see, at our house, you can never find the orange pealer and there is usually someone in a huff--Mitchell--looking for it because someone--Ethan--lost it! So, YES! I would LOVE a citrus pealer! I was so excited to be bringing home things for my boys when I realized I was bringing home "3" things... These weren't my findings...they were my Brycer's findings for his brothers...3 things! What a guy. He continues to watch out for his brothers...even if it is the little things in life that they are receiving... Cool huh???

A couple days later, my friend LeeAnn calls and we are talking as I am driving to Lake City. I had just told her that when we see eagles, we consider them a sign from Bryce...because the night that he passed away, people saw an eagle over our house. So, as I am telling LeeAnn, I look up at a tree on a farm, and there sits a huge eagle in a tree!!! I am so shocked and telling her that I can not even believe it, when I look up as I am driving by the next farm and there sits 2 more eagles in 2 seperate trees!!! That's right, 3 in all!!! It was awesome! Today, Tim was at his mom and dad's place--just a mile up the road from us--and he hears some screeching outside the shed. He went outside to find 3 eagles flying over head, right above mom and dad's place... Again, sooooo cool! Our Brycer is with us in so many ways...

Tomorrow, March 8th is a special day for us in a few ways. It is the annual Bryce Breuer Memorial Jaycee Wrestling Tournament in Goodhue. We are really looking forward to it. It brings many, many kids from all over. Tomorrow is also Bryce's best buddy, Garett's, 10th birthday... It's like a holiday to us... Bryce had so much trust, understanding, and friendship with Garett since birth. They could pretty much read each other's minds. Garett always looked out for Bryce in school to make sure he felt normal and no one did anything to bother him. Bryce confided in Garett like no other. I wish I could have been a mouse in the corner for each of their many conversations... Later on tomorrow, we will get the Hue-Breu's (Remember the boys named our family's the Hebrews a few years ago) together here to watch some of our dvd's of Bryce but mostly to watch the New York City dvd from our trip to NYC with Garett and Lana. We are looking forward to it including a few laughs with it! So,

HAPPY 10th BIRTHDAY, GARETT BRYCE HUEMANN!!! You are so special to us! We love and adore you! Bryce will be hanging out with you on your birthday, I just know it!!! You are a friend for a lifetime, Garett!

And, now on to my cute story about Ethan... Yesterday, I was standing in the kitchen talking to Mitch and Logan after school. Ethan came from the dining room which is where we have all of Bryce's memorabilia. He said, "Mom, do you know what I just did? I just folded my hands like this (as he bowed his head and closed his eyes). Then, I said, 'Dear God, please bring Brycie back to us to live again.' But mom, He didn't." I said, "Oh honey, do you know why He didn't bring Brycie back?" He said, "Why mommy?" I said, "Because once someone dies and their heart stops beating, they go to heaven. And, once they go to heaven, they can't come back with us on earth." I asked him to show Mitch and Logan what he did. So, he did and he was a little embaressed. But, I could see by the looks on their faces, the big brothers thought it was very sweet. I know that we have all wished that Bryce could come back at some time or another this past year....

I will always praise God for the strength and healing that He has given Bryce. I will also praise Him for carrying us through this journey in life. What ever His purpose is for us, I pray that we will listen to Him and do what is right and good in His eyes for His work... Please continue the prayers for all the children, and adults, who are fighting their battles, healing from their "battle wounds", or their family member's who are left behind as their loved one transitions into their NEW LIFE... And, as always, God gets all the glory!!! We love you all!

"Be strong and let us fight bravely for our people and the cities of our God. The Lord will do what is good in his sight." 1 Chronicles 19:13

Please include these awesome servants for the Lord in your prayers:
Will: www.caringbridge.org/mn/willcanan. He is going through treatments again for his relapsed brain tumor. What a trooper! We adore him!!! He is Bryce's age.
Barb: www.caringbridge.org/visit/barbberg. She is bringing people closer to the Lord through her battle.
Leann and Lisa who continue to fight and will also win their battles with the Lord by their side.

"I am the Way, the Truth, and the LIFE." John 14:6
**From Bryce's favorite Bible book marker which has Jesus' picture on the front.

"Walk by faith, not by sight." 2 Corin. 5:7
**Bryce's favorite!!!

"With God all things are possible." Matthew 19:26.
My favorite!

"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
Isaiah 41:10

"I will build them up and not tear them down; I will plant them and not uproot them. I will give them a heart to know me, that I am the Lord. They will be my people, and I will be their God." Jeremiah 24:6-7

"But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40:31

We've met many new faces on our son's journey with cancer. We feel the pain of many family's who also struggle with cancer or another life-threatening disease. Please say a prayer for all the little people on 3 Francis of St. Mary's Hospital. Pray for God's healing touch for each one of these children. Pray for strength for each of their family's. And, pray for those who have not yet placed their child in God's hands, to do so. They need to give Him all of the control. With God, we have everything. Without Him, we have nothing. Please continue to send out prayers for all those fighting their battles, like Will, Kristin, Kristina, Griffin, Jackson, Isaac, Melanie, Signe, Teagon, Rachel, Wes, Paul, Heidi, Ethan, Joe, Jamie, Nikki, Brock, Sierra, Ellen, Austin, Kat, Audrey, Barbara, Josh, Rian, & Alyssa. Pray for strength for all of the family's who have lost a loved one to cancer or another disease. These people are all so special to us!!! Give them strength, Lord, and give them peace within.

Take Care & God Bless~

The Breu Crew
Tim & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Sunday, February 24, 2008 9:33 PM CST
"Be strong and courageous and get to work. Don't be frightened by the size of the task, for the Lord my God is with you; He will not forsake you. He will see to it that everything is finished correctly." 1 Chronicles 28:20

HAPPY 8th BIRTHDAY, JOEL STANLEY (2/25)!!!
You are such an amazing and compassionate son. You bring us joy and so much love! We love your silliness and sincerity.
You are a true gift from God...

"Teach me to do Your will, for You are my God; may Your good Spirit lead me on level ground." Psalm 143:10

Dear God,
We praise You for the strength You give us. We praise You for the lives we live. Lord, enlighten our paths to see Your goodness and mercy. Open our eyes to see Your vision in our lives. Help us to see the purpose that You have for us. Remind us to open our ears to listen to You and to trust You with all of our hearts. Forgive us of our sins. Thank You for Your unconditional, amazing love. Amen.

"Be strong and let us fight bravely for our people and the cities of our God. The Lord will do what is good in his sight." 1 Chronicles 19:13

Tonight I ask you to pray for Tim's cousin, Ryan (26 y.o.), who was in a snowmobiling accident yesterday. In surgery today, they fused part of his vertebrae to stabilize it and take the pressure off his spinal cord in hopes of bringing down the swelling in his spinal cord. Now, and always, we continue to put our TOTAL AND COMPLETE TRUST IN THE LORD for Ryan's complete healing!!! And, as always, GOD WILL GET ALL THE GLORY!!! Ryan's site is www.carepages.com, his page is RDBuck. Leave him an encouraging message, I know that he and his family appreciate every message that they receive and every prayer that is said. You are so strong, Ryan! You WILL make it through this by the grace of God!

We had Joel's family birthday party today. The house was filled with lots of love... We played Bryce's dvd. It's just so great--bittersweet--to see him... We are asking him to "hang out" with Ryan, if he's not already. Our prayers are powerful for Ryan's healing. Somedays can be such difficult days and then, it hits me. Have I given it ALL to God???? Once I release all my worries and burdens--because He can handle them so much better than I--then I feel so much better. Like a weight has been lifted off. You should really try it sometime. One of my favorite scriptures is "Worry about nothing. Pray about everything." I think sometimes prayer becomes such a 'forgotten' thing until we 'need' something... So, today my focus has been on 'prayer'. How about you?

On Friday, Bryce's heavenly birthday, we went to Bryce's grave. We had his buddy, Nathan, with us. Nathan's mom, Pam, had a super great idea...so we used it! We all flopped on our backs in the snow and made SNOW ANGELS FOR BRYCE!!! It was awesome! We took pictures and video taped it too. I know that Bryce loved the snow angels we made for him. I also forgot to mention that the Johnson's--(CB) Missy Sierra's family--came over for a visit last Sunday. Sierra had recheck appointments at Mayo with good results. Now, she doesn't return to the clinic until 6 months! Wahoo! Our visit was so so wonderful. It was relaxing and good for the soul. The kids played outside for quite a while with the snowmobile and sleds. We always have a great time when we get the family's together! ** I forgot to mention that Sierra's mommy, Serena, updated Sierra's CB page and has many wonderful memories of our Brycer and a song dedicated to him. Thank you so much, Serena! Go and check it out, it is awesome! Here's her page: www.caringbridge.org/mn/missysierra. I also forgot to mention that in January when we had a Monday off, we went to the Owatonna hotel waterpark--which was a gift from one of Tim's classmates after Bryce passed away. Some of our CB family's joined us there!--Ethan Strenge's family, Ellen Hagen's family, and Rachel Tweeten's family. It was awesome!!! The kids all enjoyed the water and it was nice to catch up with everyone. The best part was to see Ethan and Rachel doing so very well! Praise God!!! I missed my 'squishy girl' though. Ellen ended up going into the Owatonna hospital the next day for pneumonia. I also missed little Miss Ella Anderson... Her brother had a fever so they couldn't make it. We will catch up with them some other time. We are just grateful that it worked out for everyone! Thank you, God. My last thing that I have forgotten to mention was our visit to the Ronald McDonald House in Rochester last Thursday for BINGO with Tim's parents, sisters, and our nephews and our boys. We brought many toys in memory of our Brycer because that is what he would have wanted us to do! We all had a very good time! Thanks, RMH--also known to some of us CB family's as Ramada Mariott Hilton... We never needed to stay there because we live so close to Mayo but we know how wonderful the people are there! It's a home away from home. Thanks for letting us spoil the kids, Paula! We loved every minute of it!

Tomorrow, Joel wants to go to Bryce's favorite restaurant (Carlos O'Kelly's mexican) for his birthday supper. That's where Bryce chose on his 8th birthday, May '06. So, we will be off to Rochester and then, hopefully stop in to see Ryan. It won't be easy to step back into St. Mary's Hospital again but, by the grace of God, we will get through it. Ryan is much more important than letting our emotions and memories control us. So, maybe just say a little prayer that the 'flood gates' don't open up for us, ok??? Thank you. We love you all! Thank you for all of the prayers, cards, and flowers that you have been sending!!! We took all of the flowers to church today so all of our church family could enjoy them! It was beautiful. There were so many beautiful Easter--Jesus Lives!--colors. Praise God for the colors in this world... God bless you all.

For my Brycer:
"To him who overcomes, I will give the right to eat from the tree of life, which is in the paradise of God." Revelation 2:7

HAPPY 1st HEAVENLY BIRTHDAY, BRYCE ANDREW BREUER!!! You are a Child of God, and you are so loved!!! You have been rewarded with the gift of eternal life at a young age for a reason only known by God Himself. We praise God for your presence in our lives. We praise God for His presence in our lives... With God, we have everything. Without God, we have nothing. We love you, buddy!

At Bryce's Memorial Service, Bryce's buddy, Ryan Alpers, read a letter that he wrote to KTIS about "How his friend, Bryce, changed his life." He even sang part of Michael W. Smith's song "Friends" with his letter. It was beautiful!!! Here is the internet address link so that you can see Michael W. Smith singing "Friends" along with the words of the song:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IbPKaIozS-c&feature=related.
You will LOVE it! As I told Ryan,...I think he has a future in the Christian Music Industry!!!

After Ryan read and sang, Bryce's best buddy, Garett, read a poem that he found for Bryce. Here's what Garett said and read:

"I saw this poem and it made me think of Bryce and the garden he loved to be in. It is called 'Meet You At The Gate' by Barbar Bailey

A beautiful garden now stands alone,
Missing the one who nurtured it but now he is gone,
His garden still sows and the sun it still shines,
But the rain is like tear drops for the ones left behind.
The weeds lay waiting to take the gardens beauty away,
But the beautiful memories of its keeper are in our hearts here to stay.
He loved every plant even some that were weeds,
So much love he would plant with each little seed.
But just like his plants he was part of God's plan,
So when it was his time, God reached down His hand.
He looked through the garden, searching for the best,
That's when he found Bryce, it was his time to rest.
It was hard for those who loved him to just let him go,
But God had a spot in His garden that needed a gentle soul.
So when you start missing Bryce, remember if you just wait,
When God has a spot in his garden, Bryce will meet you at the gate...
I miss you Bryce, until we meet at the gate. Garett."

"To the man who pleases Him, God gives wisdom, knowledge and happiness." Ecclesiastes 2:26

Please include these awesome servants for the Lord in your prayers:
Will: www.caringbridge.org/mn/willcanan. He is going through treatments again for his relapsed brain tumor. What a trooper! We adore him!!! He is Bryce's age.
Barb: www.caringbridge.org/visit/barbberg. She is bringing people closer to the Lord through her battle.
Leann and Lisa who continue to fight and will also win their battles with the Lord by their side.

Bryce's Uncle Brad wrote this poem last week:
IT seems so unfair, for someone so young...
He's traveled to heaven, so many things he hadn't done...
His heart so pure, and his soul is so kind...
Caring about others... was priority #1 in his mind...
In reflections of my life, and of what I complain...
I feel silly and foolish, HE was the one dealing with pain.
He was smiley and funny... quick with a joke...
Other people's hearts, he'd let nobody poke...
He cared about others, with no limitation...
On the highway to happiness, HE gave people transportation
Whatever was bothering him was never a factor...
He's with Jesus now...
Trolling for walleyes... on HIS John Deere tractor.

"I am the Way, the Truth, and the LIFE." John 14:6
**From Bryce's favorite Bible book marker which has Jesus' picture on the front.

"Walk by faith, not by sight." 2 Corin. 5:7
**Bryce's favorite!!!

"With God all things are possible." Matthew 19:26.
My favorite!

"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
Isaiah 41:10

"I will build them up and not tear them down; I will plant them and not uproot them. I will give them a heart to know me, that I am the Lord. They will be my people, and I will be their God." Jeremiah 24:6-7

"But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40:31

We've met many new faces on our son's journey with cancer. We feel the pain of many family's who also struggle with cancer or another life-threatening disease. Please say a prayer for all the little people on 3 Francis of St. Mary's Hospital. Pray for God's healing touch for each one of these children. Pray for strength for each of their family's. And, pray for those who have not yet placed their child in God's hands, to do so. They need to give Him all of the control. With God, we have everything. Without Him, we have nothing. Please continue to send out prayers for all those fighting their battles, like Will, Kristin, Kristina, Griffin, Jackson, Isaac, Melanie, Signe, Teagon, Rachel, Wes, Paul, Heidi, Ethan, Joe, Jamie, Nikki, Brock, Sierra, Ellen, Austin, Kat, Audrey, Barbara, Josh, Rian, & Alyssa. Pray for strength for all of the family's who have lost a loved one to cancer or another disease. These people are all so special to us!!! Give them strength, Lord, and give them peace within.

Take Care & God Bless~

The Breu Crew
Tim & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Friday, February 22, 2008 10:52 AM CST
"Be strong and courageous and get to work. Don't be frightened by the size of the task, for the Lord my God is with you; He will not forsake you. He will see to it that everything is finished correctly." 1 Chronicles 28:20

For my Brycer:
"To him who overcomes, I will give the right to eat from the tree of life, which is in the paradise of God." Revelation 2:7

For those who wait upon the Lord:
"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." Romans 15:13

"Teach me to do Your will, for You are my God; may Your good Spirit lead me on level ground." Psalm 143:10

Dear God,
I thank you and praise Your heavenly name for the gift of life on earth and in heaven. I thank you for Your gift of being a Child of God. I thank you for our precious boys' and for the time we had with our son, Bryce, on earth. I thank you for the gift of eternal healing for Bryce. I lift my eyes to You for patience and guidance until the day we reunite with Bryce in heaven. I will wait anxiously to see Jesus face to face and to see the glorious beauty of heaven. Please forgive me of my sins and have mercy on me, a sinner. Thank you for watching over Your children and keeping them in Your safe and loving arms. And, by Your grace, I will Walk By Faith, not by sight. In Your holy and precious name, Amen.

"Be strong and let us fight bravely for our people and the cities of our God. The Lord will do what is good in his sight." 1 Chronicles 19:13

HAPPY 1st HEAVENLY BIRTHDAY, BRYCE ANDREW BREUER!!! You are a Child of God, and you are so loved!!! You have been rewarded with the gift of eternal life at a young age for a reason only known by God Himself. We praise God for your presence in our lives. We praise God for His presence in our lives... With God, we have everything. Without God, we have nothing. We love you, buddy!

*Thanks to Carol from Chatfield for the acknowledgement of Psalm 23 with Bryce's picture!*

Today is a day to be celebrating Bryce's life! We are so grateful to God that we were chosen to be Bryce's family and friends. We are so grateful for YOU, our comforters! Thank you for the many guestbook entries that we have been receiving from all of you! You are wonderful!!! You lift us up in such an emotional time!!! I can't thank you enough!!! I ask that at 4:08pm today--to the minute that Bryce took his last breath, one year ago--you have a moment of PRAYER FOR STRENGTH, PEACE, AND HEALING for the children who are fighting their battles and for the family's who have (momentarily) said 'Goodbye' to their loved one's until they reunite once again at heaven's gates. THANK YOU FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART AND BRYCE'S COMPASSIONATE, HEART OF GOLD.... Thank you.

Yesterday's Memorial Service for Bryce was so perfect!!! I played the dvd of pictures with the Christian music, before the service, on a big screen that Pastor Mike set up. We had Bryce's cousin--Jordan, his brother--Joel, and his friends'--Nathan & Keisha, read scriptures. His friend, Ryan, read a letter that Ryan wrote to KTIS about "How his friend, Bryce, changed his life." He even sang part of Michael W. Smith's song "Friends" with his letter. It was beautiful!!! Here is the internet address link so that you can see Michael W. Smith singing "Friends" along with the words of the song:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IbPKaIozS-c&feature=related.
You will LOVE it! As I told Ryan,...I think he has a future in the Christian Music Industry!!!

After Ryan read and sang, Bryce's best buddy, Garett, read a poem that he found for Bryce. Here's what Garett said and read:

"I saw this poem and it made me think of Bryce and the garden he loved to be in. It is called 'Meet You At The Gate' by Barbar Bailey

A beautiful garden now stands alone,
Missing the one who nurtured it but now he is gone,
His garden still sows and the sun it still shines,
But the rain is like tear drops for the ones left behind.
The weeds lay waiting to take the gardens beauty away,
But the beautiful memories of its keeper are in our hearts here to stay.
He loved every plant even some that were weeds,
So much love he would plant with each little seed.
But just like his plants he was part of God's plan,
So when it was his time, God reached down His hand.
He looked through the garden, searching for the best,
That's when he found Bryce, it was his time to rest.
It was hard for those who loved him to just let him go,
But God had a spot in His garden that needed a gentle soul.
So when you start missing Bryce, remember if you just wait,
When God has a spot in his garden, Bryce will meet you at the gate...

I miss you Bryce, until we meet at the gate". Garett.

Isn't that just beautiful!!! Remember these are 9 & 10 year olds--Bryce's buddies--who are touching lives!!! Amazing! We love all of them so very much!

After Garett read, Mitchell read Uncle Brad's poem. That was great to have in the service too. Brad had read Bryce's eulogy at Bryce's funeral. Then, I played a dvd of Bryce telling his fishing story, kissing (surprise lick!) his mom, our New York bike buggy ride with Lana & Garett along with some time in our NYC apartment, the surprise splash from the dolphin sent from Bryce at the MN Zoo to Bryce's classmates which they all loved!, and then Bryce's 'goodbye goofy faces'... Ironically--NOT!--the song "Friends" played in the background of the dvd of Bryce. It was beautiful! There were a few tears shed here because we were all soooooooooooo ready to see Bryce and his silliness once again! It had been a year! Thank you so much for helping me again, Tom!!! You are so great!

Pastor Mike never ceases to amaze me... He had a basket full of flower seed packages with a beautiful hymnal song about planting a garden--so fitting with Garett's poem!!!--that he felt was so much like Bryce and his arrival in heaven. Thanks, Pastor Mike for all of your help and your beautiful gesture for Bryce and his buddies. And, I'm not sure if I've ever told you what Pastor Mike did for our family a year ago during Bryce's final hours on earth. Pastor Mike came out after Bryce's major seizure, when he was in his comatose state. He baptized Bryce again. He anointed him with oil and marked him with the Cross of Christ Forever, once again. Pastor Mike said a beautiful prayer at Lenten service that night and then, came back out to our house. He came out many times in the next few days, also. We are so grateful to have Pastor Mike, and our whole St. Luke congregation, in our lives! God is so good. Again, thanks to all of Bryce's 4th grade classmates who came!!! It was so awesome to have you there celebrating with us!!! We love you all so very much!!! You are so special to us! Thanks to all of our family and friends, too. You have done so much for us and have gotten us through our first year without Bryce. I don't know what we would do without you!!! Thanks to all of our CB family's for your prayers that you are calling out for for our family today and everyday. Again, thanks to all of you for your guestbook entries! We are enjoying them all so very much!

And finally, after the service was done, we sent orange balloons off to Bryce in heaven once again. You know what he told me he did with all of them? He loved catching all of them! And with each one, he gave them to the special little children in heaven. He didn't even keep one for himself because he wanted the children to each have a balloon sent from his family and friends from earth to his family and friends in heaven... Bless his precious little heart... I love you, Bryce Andrew Breuer!!! You're my guy... *I feel like Bryce is telling me to make sure that everyone knows that it is his little brother, Joel's, 8th birthday on Monday, February 25th. I know, and Bryce knows, that Joel would just love messages from many of you!

***So, today and everyday... From Bryce and his family, hug your children a little tighter and a lot more frequently. Love them...with the unconditional love of the Lord. Thank and praise God every moment that you think of it today (and everyday) for every single blessing in your life. Complain less. Love more. Make others feel special. Grow your faith and grow someone else's faith. Look to heaven and as Bryce would say, "Walk by faith, not by sight"... We love you all.........

"To the man who pleases Him, God gives wisdom, knowledge and happiness." Ecclesiastes 2:26

Please include these awesome servants for the Lord in your prayers:
Dave: www.caringbridge.org/visit/davefredrickson. He is our very special friend's dad.
Will: www.caringbridge.org/mn/willcanan. He is going through treatments again for his relapsed brain tumor. What a trooper! We adore him!!! He is Bryce's age.
Barb: www.caringbridge.org/visit/barbberg. She is bringing people closer to the Lord through her battle.
Leann and Lisa who continue to fight and will also win their battles with the Lord by their side.

**I must keep this here for a few more days**
I have been reading about people's experiences of "signs from beyond". What beautiful signs they have received from loved one's!!! Their description of heaven is so majestic, so beautiful... It's paradise! Hearing the description of it's beauty and the celestial music,--just as Bryce would have loved and appreciated every part of it--I know that Bryce was meant, and made, for heaven...Just as all of us are. Bryce is so happy there! I picture heaven and I picture Bryce, and I know there is no place that he would rather be... He always appreciated God's beauty. He would color pictures of rainbows with such perfection and grace with every vivid color. He loved music and singing. He loved peace and happiness, no pain for anyone and no arguing. He had such a love for life! And, LIFE to me means GOD... I had a dream this morning, and I have not had many dreams about Bryce so here it is... I was with other mom's at this daycamp-like place for kids. It was 5:00pm, and Natalie and I came back from getting an ice cream cone. We were done for the day. I walked into the next, connected building and called for Lana on the intercom system. She said she was coming out to meet me in the hallway. The doors opened and she came out. And then, I saw Bryce!!! He was wearing his t-shirt, sweatpants, and his gray tennis shoes. He looked good, like he did in the spring of 2006 after his transplant. He ran to me. I fell to my knees on the floor, and we HUGGED!!! He said in his precious Bryce voice, "I missed you, Mom!" And, I cried so loud and so hard and said, "I missed you, too Bryce! I love you!!!" Sheila Pasch was looking at us from 5 feet away and said, "That is so sweet." Then suddenly, I felt myself being pulled up and to my right like a suction or vacuum but not physically, if that makes sense. As I was being pulled, I heard "This is a dream..." And then, I woke up crying... I was so happy that I had hugged him again...even if it was in a dream...I had hugged him again. I haven't hugged my Brycer for one year. It felt good... Thank you, God, for my dream of Bryce... I can't wait until I can hold him again in heaven... I love you, Brycer!!! You're my guy... I went downstairs and told Tim and the boys and cried some more. Then, I went to the computer and looked down. There was a hand-made card on the floor that had fallen out of Tim's desk. It was orange and made out of crape paper. On the front, it says "Mom you are" and then has a heart with an arrow through it. On the inside, it says "The BEST" on the left and "Happy Mother's Day" on the right. It has Bryce's awesome handwriting with his decorative swirlies and flowers. I know he made it for me. He was always so thoughtful and considerate to his Mommy. He loved me so much! Again....THANK YOU GOD!!! I needed that! We treasure everything that the boys do, say, and make for us but Bryce's things we take very good care of because it is the "last things" of his that we will ever have... It may sound selfish but it is what we do because we know how we must wait upon the Lord now for Bryce's signs and our arrival in heaven.

**I just have to keep this here also for a few more days**
I received an email from my brother, Brad, who is in Pennsylvania until Sunday when he comes for Joel's birthday party. He left for Blackhawk helicopter repair training the beginning of January. Brad is the "fishing uncle". He was also one of Bryce's Godfather's. Here is what he wrote:

"Hello Susie, Tim, and men... I love you all so much !!! I woke up yesterday with something to say to everyone and I hope it's ok to tell it... so here it goes... I think I'll call it "About Bryce"...

IT seems so unfair, for someone so young...
He's traveled to heaven, so many things he hadn't done...
His heart so pure, and his soul is so kind...
Caring about others... was priority #1 in his mind...
In reflections of my life, and of what I complain...
I feel silly and foolish, HE was the one dealing with pain.
He was smiley and funny... quick with a joke...
Other people's hearts, he'd let nobody poke...
He cared about others, with no limitation...
On the highway to happiness, HE gave people transportation
Whatever was bothering him was never a factor...
He's with Jesus now...
Trolling for walleyes... on HIS John Deere tractor.

---- I LOVE YOU ALL--- I'm with you in mind every minute, of every day... I LOVE YOU LIKE A BROTHER... and boys, I LOVE YA LIKE AN UNCLE !!"

Is that awesome and so much like Bryce or what??????!!!!! I couldn't keep it to myself. It is purely Bryce. Thank you, Brad. And, thank you, God, for giving him the words. It means the world to me and Tim...

"I am the Way, the Truth, and the LIFE." John 14:6
**From Bryce's favorite Bible book marker which has Jesus' picture on the front.

"Walk by faith, not by sight." 2 Corin. 5:7
**Bryce's favorite!!!

"With God all things are possible." Matthew 19:26.
My favorite!

"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
Isaiah 41:10

"Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. Impress them on your children. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates." Deuteronomy 6:5-9
"I will build them up and not tear them down; I will plant them and not uproot them. I will give them a heart to know me, that I am the Lord. They will be my people, and I will be their God." Jeremiah 24:6-7

Bryce was a great fisherman--walleyes, northern pike, and crappies feared him--but he was an even greater fisher-of-men, women , and young people. He'd cast out his love, kindness, thoughtfulness, and generosity--and everyone he met would latch onto that bait and never let go. --By Uncle Brad, Bryce's Fishing Buddy--

Mitchell's scripture reading from Bryce's funeral: Romans 8:30-39. "If God is for us, who is against us?"
Logan's scripture reading from Bryce's funeral: "I lift up my eyes to the hills--where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth." Psalm 121:1-2 That is from one of our favorite songs "Praise You In The Storm" by Casting Crowns.

Sir Bryce Breuer, a young knight, from the land of Goodhue,
Your heart has proved to be brave and true.

A warrior so gallant, courageous and strong,
He is wise beyond years, though this knight be so young,

Sir Bryce wakes to battle and fights valiantly 'til nigh,
Slaying dragons that circle on land and in sky,

He is clad with thick armor 'tis weightless as air,
His sword is our love and his shield is our prayer,

No dragon shall defeat our noble Sir Bryce,
For he is carried forth always by our Lord Jesus Christ.
~By Nyla Hagen, Ellen's mom and our very dear friend~

"But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40:31

We've met many new faces on our son's journey with cancer. We feel the pain of many family's who also struggle with cancer or another life-threatening disease. Please say a prayer for all the little people on 3 Francis of St. Mary's Hospital. Pray for God's healing touch for each one of these children. Pray for strength for each of their family's. And, pray for those who have not yet placed their child in God's hands, to do so. They need to give Him all of the control. With God, we have everything. Without Him, we have nothing. Please continue to send out prayers for all those fighting their battles, like Will, Kristin, Kristina, Griffin, Jackson, Isaac, Melanie, Signe, Teagon, Rachel, Wes, Paul, Heidi, Ethan, Joe, Jamie, Nikki, Brock, Sierra, Ellen, Austin, Kat, Audrey, Barbara, Josh, Rian, & Alyssa. Pray for strength for all of the family's who have lost a loved one to cancer or another disease. These people are all so special to us!!! Give them strength, Lord, and give them peace within.

Take Care & God Bless~

The Breu Crew
Tim & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Thursday, February 21, 2008 9:38 AM CST
"Be strong and courageous and get to work. Don't be frightened by the size of the task, for the Lord my God is with you; He will not forsake you. He will see to it that everything is finished correctly." 1 Chronicles 28:20

For my Brycer:
"To him who overcomes, I will give the right to eat from the tree of life, which is in the paradise of God." Revelation 2:7

For those who wait upon the Lord:
"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." Romans 15:13

"Teach me to do Your will, for You are my God; may Your good Spirit lead me on level ground." Psalm 143:10

Dear God,
I exchange my thimble for rivers overflowing. I ask You to move my huge mountains. Fill my faith so that it is an overflowing river. Help me to overlook my obstacles in grief that are mountains to me, yet they are ant hills to You. I trust You, Lord, with my life which You created with a purpose. I pray that I will be aware of Your will for the purpose in my life. Give me Your strength to get through these difficult days. Help me to focus on You and on heaven. Amen.

"Be strong and let us fight bravely for our people and the cities of our God. The Lord will do what is good in his sight." 1 Chronicles 19:13

This week, my mind is flooded with memories of Bryce's last hours. Yesterday was one of the most difficult days I have ever experienced. I seriously prayed for God to give me strength so that I would not fall apart! God answers prayers...He sent Carol to call. It has really been hard this week. Monday and Tuesday, I prayed for strength. Yesterday, I focused on heaven...but then I started to fall apart. During those three days, I just didn't "feel like" crying. I know that sounds weird and sounds a bit controlling. But sometimes, with all of the grief, you just don't "feel like" crying. And, I didn't. Today my focus is on my son, Bryce, his brothers, his cousins, and his friends. It was a year ago today--according to the "Thursday"--that Bryce took his last breath. I remember it like it was yeserday... I remember our house filled with Bryce's grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins. I remember Dave Clutter from KTIS praying for Bryce on the radio as a request from Stacy Mandelkow--thanks Stacy! That meant the world to me... Then, Dave also called our home after Bryce passed away and prayed again on the radio... God is so good. You are all so wonderful!!!

Today is a new day. What a special time for the lunear eclipse, isn't it?... It's a special time for Bryce for us... We will celebrate his ONE YEAR HEAVENLY BIRTHDAY. But, his celebration in heaven goes on everyday!!! Can you imagine??? I do not want this to be a pity party for me or any of us. Of course, I understand and have totally experienced the "roller coaster" of life and it will still go on for years. But, I just want to do and focus on what is God's plan. I can tell that my boys are missing their brother Bryce today and this week... This morning, Mitchell cut out Bryce's memorial poem that we put in the paper. And, Joel took it to school to show his classmates. I have been running some videos of Bryce last night and the night before. The brothers watch with huge tear-filled eyes... Ethan tries to talk to Bryce but doesn't understand why Bryce won't answer him back. Bless their precious hearts... Bryce had such a love for life and love for others! It was truly amazing.

Today, we are having a short and small Memorial Service for Bryce. We are keeping it to close family and Bryce's classmates. We hope that this will help them with their joy for their friend, Bryce, whom they all cared for so much. I think it is going to be pretty neat... I know that God's presence, and Bryce's presence, will fill our church and fill everyone's hearts. Tonight, we are going with Grandpa Arnie and Grandma Linda to take toys to the Ronald McDonal House in memory of Bryce. Giving to the children who were sick meant so much to Bryce... It is BINGO night, just what the brothers wanted! We are really looking forward to it. Especially since Bryce "made" this one happen too... It was the only night that worked out for them and us together... And, Auntie Manda has today and tomorrow off. I was very nervous to say YES for today being the 'RMH day' because I didn't know how I would be emotionally but knew Bryce was insisting... Bless his precious little heart. He wanted us to be happy today, not sad.

Now for my Bryce sign... Bryce was with me when I was at school on Tuesday making the note for the 4th Graders. He wanted me to see the brothers! As I was walking through the hallway going to Mr. Bitzan's room and I was talking to Mrs. Pasch, I looked to my left and saw Mitchell. "Hi Mitch!" Then, I turned and was heading down the hall when I glanced at Logan's class room. There, by the doorway, is Logan. "Hi Logan!" We goofed around for a minute. Then, I went upstairs to talk to Mr. Bitzan. I came back downstairs and saw this boy walking in front of me... "Joel, is that you?!" Sure enough! He turned around, "Hi Mom!" I said, "Well, I guess Bryce wanted me to see the brothers today at school!" All within about 10 minutes and 20 feet from each other... What are the chances??? That's my Brycer... Thanks, buddy! Mommy loves you!!!!!!!!

So, today... From Bryce and his family, hug your children a little tighter and a lot more frequently. Love them...with the unconditional love of the Lord. Thank and praise God every moment that you think of it today (and everyday) for every single blessing in your life. Complain less. Love more. Make others feel special. Grow your faith and grow someone else's faith. Look to heaven and as Bryce would say, "Walk by faith, not by sight"... We love you all.........

"To the man who pleases Him, God gives wisdom, knowledge and happiness." Ecclesiastes 2:26

Please include these awesome servants for the Lord in your prayers:
Dave: www.caringbridge.org/visit/davefredrickson. He is our very special friend's dad.
Will: www.caringbridge.org/mn/willcanan. He is going through treatments again for his relapsed brain tumor. What a trooper! We adore him!!! He is Bryce's age.
Barb: www.caringbridge.org/visit/barbberg. She is bringing people closer to the Lord through her battle.
Leann and Lisa who continue to fight and will also win their battles with the Lord by their side.

**I must keep this here for a few more days**
I have been reading about people's experiences of "signs from beyond". What beautiful signs they have received from loved one's!!! Their description of heaven is so majestic, so beautiful... It's paradise! Hearing the description of it's beauty and the celestial music,--just as Bryce would have loved and appreciated every part of it--I know that Bryce was meant, and made, for heaven...Just as all of us are. Bryce is so happy there! I picture heaven and I picture Bryce, and I know there is no place that he would rather be... He always appreciated God's beauty. He would color pictures of rainbows with such perfection and grace with every vivid color. He loved music and singing. He loved peace and happiness, no pain for anyone and no arguing. He had such a love for life! And, LIFE to me means GOD... I had a dream this morning, and I have not had many dreams about Bryce so here it is... I was with other mom's at this daycamp-like place for kids. It was 5:00pm, and Natalie and I came back from getting an ice cream cone. We were done for the day. I walked into the next, connected building and called for Lana on the intercom system. She said she was coming out to meet me in the hallway. The doors opened and she came out. And then, I saw Bryce!!! He was wearing his t-shirt, sweatpants, and his gray tennis shoes. He looked good, like he did in the spring of 2006 after his transplant. He ran to me. I fell to my knees on the floor, and we HUGGED!!! He said in his precious Bryce voice, "I missed you, Mom!" And, I cried so loud and so hard and said, "I missed you, too Bryce! I love you!!!" Sheila Pasch was looking at us from 5 feet away and said, "That is so sweet." Then suddenly, I felt myself being pulled up and to my right like a suction or vacuum but not physically, if that makes sense. As I was being pulled, I heard "This is a dream..." And then, I woke up crying... I was so happy that I had hugged him again...even if it was in a dream...I had hugged him again. I haven't hugged my Brycer for one year. It felt good... Thank you, God, for my dream of Bryce... I can't wait until I can hold him again in heaven... I love you, Brycer!!! You're my guy... I went downstairs and told Tim and the boys and cried some more. Then, I went to the computer and looked down. There was a hand-made card on the floor that had fallen out of Tim's desk. It was orange and made out of crape paper. On the front, it says "Mom you are" and then has a heart with an arrow through it. On the inside, it says "The BEST" on the left and "Happy Mother's Day" on the right. It has Bryce's awesome handwriting with his decorative swirlies and flowers. I know he made it for me. He was always so thoughtful and considerate to his Mommy. He loved me so much! Again....THANK YOU GOD!!! I needed that! We treasure everything that the boys do, say, and make for us but Bryce's things we take very good care of because it is the "last things" of his that we will ever have... It may sound selfish but it is what we do because we know how we must wait upon the Lord now for Bryce's signs and our arrival in heaven.

**I just have to keep this here also for a few more days**
I received an email from my brother, Brad, who is in Pennsylvania until Sunday when he comes for Joel's birthday party. He left for Blackhawk helicopter repair training the beginning of January. Brad is the "fishing uncle". He was also one of Bryce's Godfather's. Here is what he wrote:

"Hello Susie, Tim, and men... I love you all so much !!! I woke up yesterday with something to say to everyone and I hope it's ok to tell it... so here it goes... I think I'll call it "About Bryce"...

IT seems so unfair, for someone so young...
He's traveled to heaven, so many things he hadn't done...
His heart so pure, and his soul is so kind...
Caring about others... was priority #1 in his mind...
In reflections of my life, and of what I complain...
I feel silly and foolish, HE was the one dealing with pain.
He was smiley and funny... quick with a joke...
Other people's hearts, he'd let nobody poke...
He cared about others, with no limitation...
On the highway to happiness, HE gave people transportation
Whatever was bothering him was never a factor...
He's with Jesus now...
Trolling for walleyes... on HIS John Deere tractor.

---- I LOVE YOU ALL--- I'm with you in mind every minute, of every day... I LOVE YOU LIKE A BROTHER... and boys, I LOVE YA LIKE AN UNCLE !!"

Is that awesome and so much like Bryce or what??????!!!!! I couldn't keep it to myself. It is purely Bryce. Thank you, Brad. And, thank you, God, for giving him the words. It means the world to me and Tim...

"I am the Way, the Truth, and the LIFE." John 14:6
**From Bryce's favorite Bible book marker which has Jesus' picture on the front.

"Walk by faith, not by sight." 2 Corin. 5:7
**Bryce's favorite!!!

"With God all things are possible." Matthew 19:26.
My favorite!

"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
Isaiah 41:10

"Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. Impress them on your children. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates." Deuteronomy 6:5-9
"I will build them up and not tear them down; I will plant them and not uproot them. I will give them a heart to know me, that I am the Lord. They will be my people, and I will be their God." Jeremiah 24:6-7

Bryce was a great fisherman--walleyes, northern pike, and crappies feared him--but he was an even greater fisher-of-men, women , and young people. He'd cast out his love, kindness, thoughtfulness, and generosity--and everyone he met would latch onto that bait and never let go. --By Uncle Brad, Bryce's Fishing Buddy--

Mitchell's scripture reading from Bryce's funeral: Romans 8:30-39. "If God is for us, who is against us?"
Logan's scripture reading from Bryce's funeral: "I lift up my eyes to the hills--where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth." Psalm 121:1-2 That is from one of our favorite songs "Praise You In The Storm" by Casting Crowns.

Sir Bryce Breuer, a young knight, from the land of Goodhue,
Your heart has proved to be brave and true.

A warrior so gallant, courageous and strong,
He is wise beyond years, though this knight be so young,

Sir Bryce wakes to battle and fights valiantly 'til nigh,
Slaying dragons that circle on land and in sky,

He is clad with thick armor 'tis weightless as air,
His sword is our love and his shield is our prayer,

No dragon shall defeat our noble Sir Bryce,
For he is carried forth always by our Lord Jesus Christ.
~By Nyla Hagen, Ellen's mom and our very dear friend~

"But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40:31

We've met many new faces on our son's journey with cancer. We feel the pain of many family's who also struggle with cancer or another life-threatening disease. Please say a prayer for all the little people on 3 Francis of St. Mary's Hospital. Pray for God's healing touch for each one of these children. Pray for strength for each of their family's. And, pray for those who have not yet placed their child in God's hands, to do so. They need to give Him all of the control. With God, we have everything. Without Him, we have nothing. Please continue to send out prayers for all those fighting their battles, like Will, Kristin, Kristina, Griffin, Jackson, Isaac, Melanie, Signe, Teagon, Rachel, Wes, Paul, Heidi, Ethan, Joe, Jamie, Nikki, Brock, Sierra, Ellen, Austin, Kat, Audrey, Barbara, Josh, Rian, & Alyssa. Pray for strength for all of the family's who have lost a loved one to cancer or another disease. These people are all so special to us!!! Give them strength, Lord, and give them peace within.

Take Care & God Bless~

The Breu Crew
Tim & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Monday, February 18, 2008 12:26 PM CST
"Be strong and courageous and get to work. Don't be frightened by the size of the task, for the Lord my God is with you; He will not forsake you. He will see to it that everything is finished correctly." 1 Chronicles 28:20

For my Brycer:
"To him who overcomes, I will give the right to eat from the tree of life, which is in the paradise of God." Revelation 2:7

For those who wait upon the Lord:
"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." Romans 15:13

"Teach me to do Your will, for You are my God; may Your good Spirit lead me on level ground." Psalm 143:10

Dear Lord,
Thank you for the many incredible blessings in my life! Today and everyday, my focus is on You and Your son's salvation for me, my family, and all who survive on earth who believe. Every thought, every prayer, every emotion is filled with true, unwavering faith in Your purpose for my life. Open my eyes and ears to see Your will in my life which belongs to You anyway. Help me to see the times when I am trying to have all the control so that I may in turn give it all to You. Your plan is so much bigger and better than mine. Your plan is perfect. Amen.

Please include these awesome servants for the Lord in your prayers:
Dave: www.caringbridge.org/visit/davefredrickson. He is our very special friend's dad.
Will: www.caringbridge.org/mn/willcanan. He is going through treatments again for his relapsed brain tumor. What a trooper! We adore him!!! He is Bryce's age.
***Heads-up!!! It's Will's 10th birthday Feb. 19th!!! He just got hom from treatments in NYC yesterday. Please stop by his page and wish him a Very Happy 10th Birthday! Tell him ~Bryce~ sent you~***
Barb: www.caringbridge.org/visit/barbberg. She is bringing people closer to the Lord through her battle.
Leann and Lisa who continue to fight and will also win their battles with the Lord by their side.

As the days bring us closer to Bryce's heavenly birthday which is February 22nd, we find ourselves even more sad than ever. We also find ourselves drawing even closer to the Lord. Thank you, God! We are crying with the family's who have lost a child, or another loved one. As many of the days--not all of them, though--become more difficult for us now, we know what lies ahead for each of these family's... The peaks and valleys of their journies are fresh in our minds. Many of them are expressing in their CB journals (or in conversation), how it is getting so difficult for them at this point in the journey of the loss of their child... We totally "get it"... You think you are doing "ok" and having better days maybe even moving on in your grief toward the healing process, and then, to your surprise, you fall deep into a pit. You don't want to answer the phone or leave the house, for fear that you may not be able to stop crying and people may think you are crazy or "losing it". As Nikki's mom, Kristi, wrote "I know that you are always close but not being able to hold you or hear you is so hard. God gave us the five senses and that sense of touch is the hardest to live without, at least for me in this way. I can think about those times when you and I would just hug one another." I totally agree with Kristi... It's so hard to know you won't see your child until you get to heaven but to miss their touch and love in their own personal touches is sooooo hard! I do praise the Lord for his goodness and mercy that is with us ALWAYS!!! God is so good. HE will get us through this... Please lift these children's family's up to the Lord in prayer for their day by day grief and healing process: Noelle, Nikki, Beth, Anna, Ali, Isaac, and Christian. Forgive me if I have left any special names out. I do not mean to leave anyone behind for it is a difficult journey for every family. I also know that there are family's who read our journal, and many others, who are ahead of us in the grief and healing process and know that there are better days ahead for all of us. Praise God for "better days"!!! We praise God who is our God of hope... That is what we live for...HOPE IN THE LORD.

I have been reading about people's experiences of "signs from beyond". What beautiful signs they have received from loved one's!!! Their description of heaven is so majestic, so beautiful... It's paradise! Hearing the description of it's beauty and the celestial music,--just as Bryce would have loved and appreciated every part of it--I know that Bryce was meant, and made, for heaven...Just as all of us are. Bryce is so happy there! I picture heaven and I picture Bryce, and I know there is no place that he would rather be... He always appreciated God's beauty. He would color pictures of rainbows with such perfection and grace with every vivid color. He loved music and singing. He loved peace and happiness, no pain for anyone and no arguing. He had such a love for life! And, LIFE to me means GOD... I had a dream this morning, and I have not had many dreams about Bryce so here it is... I was with other mom's at this daycamp-like place for kids. It was 5:00pm, and Natalie and I came back from getting an ice cream cone. We were done for the day. I walked into the next, connected building and called for Lana on the intercom system. She said she was coming out to meet me in the hallway. The doors opened and she came out. And then, I saw Bryce!!! He was wearing his t-shirt, sweatpants, and his gray tennis shoes. He looked good, like he did in the spring of 2006 after his transplant. He ran to me. I fell to my knees on the floor, and we HUGGED!!! He said in his precious Bryce voice, "I missed you, Mom!" And, I cried so loud and so hard and said, "I missed you, too Bryce! I love you!!!" Sheila Pasch was looking at us from 5 feet away and said, "That is so sweet." Then suddenly, I felt myself being pulled up and to my right like a suction or vacuum but not physically, if that makes sense. As I was being pulled, I heard "This is a dream..." And then, I woke up crying... I was so happy that I had hugged him again...even if it was in a dream...I had hugged him again. I haven't hugged my Brycer for one year. It felt good... Thank you, God, for my dream of Bryce... I can't wait until I can hold him again in heaven... I love you, Brycer!!! You're my guy... I went downstairs and told Tim and the boys and cried some more. Then, I went to the computer and looked down. There was a hand-made card on the floor that had fallen out of Tim's desk. It was orange and made out of crape paper. On the front, it says "Mom you are" and then has a heart with an arrow through it. On the inside, it says "The BEST" on the left and "Happy Mother's Day" on the right. It has Bryce's awesome handwriting with his decorative swirlies and flowers. I know he made it for me. He was always so thoughtful and considerate to his Mommy. He loved me so much! Again....THANK YOU GOD!!! I needed that! We treasure everything that the boys do, say, and make for us but Bryce's things we take very good care of because it is the "last things" of his that we will ever have... It may sound selfish but it is what we do because we know how we must wait upon the Lord now for Bryce's signs and our arrival in heaven.

I received an email from my brother, Brad, who is in Pennsylvania until next weekend. He left for Blackhawk helicopter repair training the beginning of January. Brad is the "fishing uncle". He was also one of Bryce's Godfather's. Here is what he wrote:

"Hello Susie, Tim, and men... I love you all so much !!! I woke up yesterday with something to say to everyone and I hope it's ok to tell it... so here it goes... I think I'll call it "About Bryce"...

IT seems so unfair, for someone so young...
He's traveled to heaven, so many things he hadn't done...
His heart so pure, and his soul is so kind...
Caring about others... was priority #1 in his mind...
In reflections of my life, and of what I complain...
I feel silly and foolish, HE was the one dealing with pain.
He was smiley and funny... quick with a joke...
Other people's hearts, he'd let nobody poke...
He cared about others, with no limitation...
On the highway to happiness, HE gave people transportation
Whatever was bothering him was never a factor...
He's with Jesus now...
Trolling for walleyes... on HIS John Deere tractor.

---- I LOVE YOU ALL--- I'm with you in mind every minute, of every day... I LOVE YOU LIKE A BROTHER... and boys, I LOVE YA LIKE AN UNCLE !!"

Is that awesome and so much like Bryce or what??????!!!!! I couldn't keep it to myself. It is purely Bryce. Thank you, Brad. And, thank you, God, for giving him the words. It means the world to me and Tim...

Now onto Eagle Bluff... We went there last Thursday, and it was so much fun! Bryce's classmates and teaches are so accepting and so loving! They were so excited to see us, and we were so excited to be there with them! The snow we received that day was absolutely beautiful! I went outside with the "Trees & Keys" group. Tim went with the "Treetops" group...note Ryan Alpers awesome message in the guestbook. Thanks, Ryan! When I went outside with our group, I said, "Wow... Do you know what the first thing that Bryce would have done when he got outside to this beautiful snow covering? He would have looked around and fallen back into the snow. Then, the beautiful Bryce Breuer Snow Angel would have been made!!! Bryce loved making Snow Angels when he got outside, first thing! Then, he would have hopped on his Kitty Kat snowmobile and rode it for an hour or so!" It was beautiful to watch his classmates faces as they pictured him making his Snow Angel and remembering him... While we were discovering the types of trees out in the nature, Mr. Bitzan and Mrs. McNamara walked up to me and Katelyn and Jessica (Bryce's classmates). The teachers were checking on us. As we talked with them, I looked up and saw a beautiful Eagle flying overhead. It was awesome! I couldn't help but tell them that I felt like that was a sign from Bryce, as it just happened to 'happen' when the teachers were with us... Awesome... We had a great day at Eagle Bluff! Thanks to Bryce's buddies who brought back the arrow heads for Logan and the rest of our family! You see, last year Logan went to Eagle Bluff with his class the week before Bryce passed away. Logan picked out very special and VERY FITTING gifts for each of his family members! He didn't even get anything for himself... He picked out an arrowhead for Bryce because Bryce was such a 'warrior' in his battle with cancer. Well, when we buried Bryce, we all put something special with him in his casket. Logan left with him his arrowhead... So, Tim had the idea to get Logan another arrowhead and a special gift while we were there but the store wasn't open at that time. So, I told Bryce's buddies and they were thrilled to "do the job"!!! Amazing and incredible kids...ALL OF THEM!

And, now for signs... I forgot to tell you about when I got home from Houston, TX for Mary Kay Leadership in January that I had many signs while I was there. Well, when I got home, Tim and the boys picked me up at the airport. I turned around to start telling them about the signs I got from Bryce when "Brave" starting playing on the radio and then, "Come To Jesus" after that... Bryce was saying, "I'm here too, Mom!" I told them about my visit at the NASA Space Museum and that night, Tim was flipping around on the TV channels when he stopped at the "Jason Davis" program where he was interviewing Minnesotans who were astronauts at NASA... What are the chances of that? Then, (this one is the biggy!!!) I needed something out of one of my bags. I had checked this smaller bag instead of carrying it on the flight with me. When I went to grab something out of it at 11pm that night, there was a "bag checked" slip on the top of the bag when I opened it... At the top of the slip are the initials "B.B." What are the chances?????????!!!!! I was thrilled with THAT sign, of course!!!! The B.B. is Bryce's initials!!! Just wanted to tell you so that you keep BELIEVING that God has His hands all over everything in your live's, in the good and in the bad... Lean on the Lord with all your might. He will get you through anything... Our love and gratitude to each and every one of you...

"I am the Way, the Truth, and the LIFE." John 14:6
**From Bryce's favorite Bible book marker which has Jesus' picture on the front.

"Walk by faith, not by sight." 2 Corin. 5:7
**Bryce's favorite!!!

"With God all things are possible." Matthew 19:26.
My favorite!

"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
Isaiah 41:10

"Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. Impress them on your children. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates." Deuteronomy 6:5-9
"I will build them up and not tear them down; I will plant them and not uproot them. I will give them a heart to know me, that I am the Lord. They will be my people, and I will be their God." Jeremiah 24:6-7

Bryce was a great fisherman--walleyes, northern pike, and crappies feared him--but he was an even greater fisher-of-men, women , and young people. He'd cast out his love, kindness, thoughtfulness, and generosity--and everyone he met would latch onto that bait and never let go. --By Uncle Brad, Bryce's Fishing Buddy--

Mitchell's scripture reading from Bryce's funeral: Romans 8:30-39. "If God is for us, who is against us?"
Logan's scripture reading from Bryce's funeral: "I lift up my eyes to the hills--where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth." Psalm 121:1-2 That is from one of our favorite songs "Praise You In The Storm" by Casting Crowns.

Sir Bryce Breuer, a young knight, from the land of Goodhue,
Your heart has proved to be brave and true.

A warrior so gallant, courageous and strong,
He is wise beyond years, though this knight be so young,

Sir Bryce wakes to battle and fights valiantly 'til nigh,
Slaying dragons that circle on land and in sky,

He is clad with thick armor 'tis weightless as air,
His sword is our love and his shield is our prayer,

No dragon shall defeat our noble Sir Bryce,
For he is carried forth always by our Lord Jesus Christ.
~By Nyla Hagen, Ellen's mom and our very dear friend~

"But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40:31

We've met many new faces on our son's journey with cancer. We feel the pain of many family's who also struggle with cancer or another life-threatening disease. Please say a prayer for all the little people on 3 Francis of St. Mary's Hospital. Pray for God's healing touch for each one of these children. Pray for strength for each of their family's. And, pray for those who have not yet placed their child in God's hands, to do so. They need to give Him all of the control. With God, we have everything. Without Him, we have nothing. Please continue to send out prayers for all those fighting their battles, like Will, Kristin, Kristina, Griffin, Jackson, Isaac, Melanie, Signe, Teagon, Rachel, Wes, Paul, Heidi, Ethan, Joe, Jamie, Nikki, Brock, Sierra, Ellen, Austin, Kat, Audrey, Barbara, Josh, Rian, & Alyssa. Pray for strength for all of the family's who have lost a loved one to cancer or another disease. These people are all so special to us!!! Give them strength, Lord, and give them peace within.

Take Care & God Bless~

The Breu Crew
Tim & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Wednesday, February 13, 2008 12:36 PM CST
"Be strong and courageous and get to work. Don't be frightened by the size of the task, for the Lord my God is with you; He will not forsake you. He will see to it that everything is finished correctly." 1 Chronicles 28:20

So much for "more in a few days"...

We're here. We're still surviving. It's just been very up and down. January rolled around, and like I said, it was way more emotional than I ever imagined with starting a "new year" without Bryce. And, now with February being Bryce's last month on earth a year ago...Putting the many emotions into words is difficult: sadness, loneliness, pain, some smiles, confusion, courage, HUGE FAITH & TRUST IN THE LORD, love--so much love... Our hearts are still broken and sore. I'm sure that our hearts will be broken for years to come yet. The pain will just become more accepting, I guess. So many dreams were shattered with Bryce's passing into his new life--which I know now he would never want us to 'wish away' from him. It was not just a dream of a mom or a dad or of 4 brothers. It was dreams of watching Bryce grow and thrive. It was watching him use his wisdom for the Lord with everyone he came in contact with, including his brothers, parents, friends, and strangers. It wasn't just his first communion, his confirmation, his first prom, his first football game or wrestling match. Who would have been his first girlfriend? What would he and his brothers, cousins, and friends have done on those hot summer weekends to get into trouble? Would he look just like I've always pictured him at 16? Would he be our 'tall' son, like we thought he would be? Our dreams were way more than even his little red-headed children coming to Grandma & Grandpa's house while he and his wife went out for an evening. It was more than wondering if he would have been farming with his dad or helping to heal the sick or helping save lives--at one time, he wanted to be a police officer. It was a million dreams of a gorgeous million-dollar smile and a servant of the Lord who would continue to touch so many lives for so many years. Bryce was wisdom beyond his young 8 1/2 years. He was unwavering faith, incredible compassion for others, and innocence and love that was contagious. He was amazing... I am so proud to be his mom.

God has continued to bless us with His amazing presence everyday. I don't know where we would be without the Lord. I love my life so much...my marriage, my children, our family's and friends'. I just wish my Brycie had never been diagnosed almost 5 years ago. I still can't believe he ever relapsed. Sorry, but it's just so hard to even grasp...all of this cancer in the world and then, the death of your child. I do not believe God gave Bryce cancer. I do believe God sent him "equipped". Bryce had the faith of a giant, a stomach of steel, and the unconditional love of God for others... Yes, we continue to struggle. Some days are bearable and even pretty good. And some days I can't stop crying. I'm sorry if I've kept many of you waiting and worrying. I never meant to. Somedays I just don't know what to write. But, I've been praying about it now for about 24 hours, and I knew that God would give me the words plus I felt his nudge...

Since my last update, Bryce has welcomed another new friend to heaven. Isaac passed away on January 23rd--that was 11 months and a day after Bryce. I know that all of the children in heaven are free and playing on heaven's playground. There is only joy and peace... Many times, I have just wished it wasn't so difficult for us here on earth without these incredible children. Please continue to say many prayers for precious Isaac's family along with the many other family's who continue to struggle through their journey's without their loved one's. Another CB friend of our's is continuing on her journey with her courageous battle. Barb is an incredible servant of the Lord. Everyday is a day closer to her new life, and everyday she lives with unwavering faith. When you think about it...Everyday is a day closer for us to our new lives, too. Are we living with unwavering faith, like Barb is? I would really appreciate it if you would continue to lift Barb up in prayer and also her husband, Jim. God brought them together and gave them a huge purpose on this earth. And, now they are fulfilling that purpose, just as Bryce did and we continue to do everyday. Her CB is www.caringbridge.org/visit/barbberg. Send her a beautiful message if you'd like, I know that she and Jim would appreciate it. What a Sister in Christ!

Today is the day that Bryc'es class has left for Eagle Bluff in Lanesboro until Friday.... What I would have given to watch him leave with his friends. To feel his excitement, enthusiasm and vibrant energy he had!!! Wow. I'm sure he is going to be there with them the entire time. How could he stand to be apart from them at such an incredible place in God's good nature?! Tomorrow morning, Tim and I will drive to Eagle Bluff to join them for the day. His teacher's invited us because Bryce's buddies parents knew that we want to continue to be a part of his class... How wonderful was that? I am really looking forward to it! We are bringing Valentine's cookies for a treat. I still can't believe it's been a year since we had that busy Valentine's Day with Bryce... He wanted to go to his class party and bring his Valentine's in. He got to see the 'world famous' crayfish. It was so great to see him smile when Garret jumped because a crayfish pinched his finger. Bryce loved his classmates so much. They were his escape to the 'normal world'... They always made him feel normal, comfortable, and loved...just to be a normal 8-year-old boy again. Thank you 4th graders!!! You are the best friends in the whole world!!! I know that Bryce continues to be with you, always and forever!

Now, I could not finish up without sharing some incredible (this word doesn't even do it justice) signs from God and Bryce with you... First of all, I couldn't even try to count how many times God has placed a name on my heart and either I see or hear from this person with 2-15 minutes... Do you listen to what God is saying to you? Do you embrace and accept, and even acknowledge, the incredible 'happenings' in your life to Him? One night I was in Target, a woman's name came into my head and I looked at the entrance 2 minutes later and there she was! I have only seen her twice in person. We spoke for 15 minutes about her son who is struggling with his own issues when I mentioned a program, Teen Challenge,--that God told me to mention to her--and she said that someone else had said that same thing to her a few days before. Then, as we are speaking, my cell phone rings from my friend who leaves a message that she saw a shooting star and said "Was that you Bryce?" When suddenly, Bryce's song "Brave" starts playing on the radio!!! So, I get out of Target and call her back and "Come To Jesus" comes on the radio! Or how about the 3 times that I am talking to my siblings, Brad, Geoff, and Julie (going to get my hair done) and "Brave" starts playing on the radio right when they mention Bryce's name (and I turn into Wanaming to Julie's salon)...? He's saying "Tell them HI and I love them!" Grandma Linda has had many signs from Bryce with his songs on the radio! One time, I sat down and started to cry because I was missing Bryce so bad when within 3 seconds his John Deere tractor clock goes off, "Come To Jesus" starts to play on the radio, and I opened my devotions directly to February 22nd--the day he passed away. One night I was standing in the bathroom and started to cry saying, "I just miss you so much, Bryce!" when his song "Legacy" starting playing on the radio in that very second! We got Joel a black kitten after Christmas. He had been asking for over a year. That morning we were wondering what Joel should name him... Keep in mind that Bryce LOVED kitties!!! So, I kept hearing the name "Jack" in my mind but kept disregarding it because Joel has a friend named Jack and I thought he wouldn't want to name his cat Jack... I never did tell Joel that I kept hearing the name Jack. Well, about 30 minutes into the kitties arrival, Joel said, "I want to name him Jack!" !!!!!!!!! Like I said, I never said the name outloud! I believe that Joel's brother, Bryce, had something to do with that one! He wanted to help name the new kittie! So cool... Another cool thing is that the annual Bryce Breuer Memorial Jaycee Wrestling Tournament in Goodhue is on Garret's (Bryce's best buddy!) 10th birthday! How cool is that?! Another thing, we are going to the Ronald McDonald House to bring toys in memory of Bryce and the only day that worked out was Thursday, February 21st--one year (according to the weekday) after Bryce's death. Bryce would have wanted us to do this instead of being sad and missing him... Amazing stuff, isn't it???? I had a dream about Bryce 2 nights ago and remembered it when I woke up but not when I came downstairs. What I do remember was that we were at a race park or something and I squatted down and rubbed my hand up and down his right arm. ***I can still feel myself doing it...*** Praise God. I need things like this...

Tim and the brothers are doing well. We know that God has a purpose for each one of us, just as He does for each one of you... I am praying daily that I will hear His words and do His work each and everyday. I am praying that our boys and my husband will also be open and willing to do God's work. It's not about us... Everything belongs to Him anyway. It's all about Him... Imagine what this world would be like if we all tried to be a little more like Jesus... And now, "Come To Jesus" begins to play on the radio. Let's all try to 'come closer to Jesus' today and everyday. We are sooooooo incredibly blessed beyond words. God is so good, and life is so good. Praise God for the 8 1/2 years that we had with Bryce. And, praise God for the eternal years that we will have with Him, Jesus, Bryce, and many of our other loved one's in our new lives!!! Have a wonderful, blessed, and faith-filled week. I promise that I will update at least by next week when it is Bryce's heavenly birthday on February 22nd. Our love and gratitude to all of you--our comforters.

"I am the Way, the Truth, and the LIFE." John 14:6
**From Bryce's favorite Bible book marker which has Jesus' picture on the front.

"Walk by faith, not by sight." 2 Corin. 5:7
**Bryce's favorite!!!

"With God all things are possible." Matthew 19:26.
My favorite!

"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
Isaiah 41:10

"Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. Impress them on your children. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates." Deuteronomy 6:5-9
"I will build them up and not tear them down; I will plant them and not uproot them. I will give them a heart to know me, that I am the Lord. They will be my people, and I will be their God." Jeremiah 24:6-7

Bryce was a great fisherman--walleyes, northern pike, and crappies feared him--but he was an even greater fisher-of-men, women , and young people. He'd cast out his love, kindness, thoughtfulness, and generosity--and everyone he met would latch onto that bait and never let go. --By Uncle Brad, Bryce's Fishing Buddy--

Mitchell's scripture reading from Bryce's funeral: Romans 8:30-39. "If God is for us, who is against us?"
Logan's scripture reading from Bryce's funeral: "I lift up my eyes to the hills--where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth." Psalm 121:1-2 That is from one of our favorite songs "Praise You In The Storm" by Casting Crowns.

Sir Bryce Breuer, a young knight, from the land of Goodhue,
Your heart has proved to be brave and true.

A warrior so gallant, courageous and strong,
He is wise beyond years, though this knight be so young,

Sir Bryce wakes to battle and fights valiantly 'til nigh,
Slaying dragons that circle on land and in sky,

He is clad with thick armor 'tis weightless as air,
His sword is our love and his shield is our prayer,

No dragon shall defeat our noble Sir Bryce,
For he is carried forth always by our Lord Jesus Christ.
~By Nyla Hagen, Ellen's mom and our very dear friend~

"But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40:31

We've met many new faces on our son's journey with cancer. We feel the pain of many family's who also struggle with cancer or another life-threatening disease. Please say a prayer for all the little people on 3 Francis of St. Mary's Hospital. Pray for God's healing touch for each one of these children. Pray for strength for each of their family's. And, pray for those who have not yet placed their child in God's hands, to do so. They need to give Him all of the control. With God, we have everything. Without Him, we have nothing. Please continue to send out prayers for all those fighting their battles, like Will, Kristin, Kristina, Griffin, Jackson, Isaac, Melanie, Signe, Teagon, Rachel, Wes, Paul, Heidi, Ethan, Joe, Jamie, Nikki, Brock, Sierra, Ellen, Austin, Kat, Audrey, Barbara, Josh, Rian, & Alyssa. Pray for strength for all of the family's who have lost a loved one to cancer or another disease. These people are all so special to us!!! Give them strength, Lord, and give them peace within.

Take Care & God Bless~

The Breu Crew
Tim & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Saturday, January 19, 2008 10:02 PM CST
"Be strong and courageous and get to work. Don't be frightened by the size of the task, for the Lord my God is with you; He will not forsake you. He will see to it that everything is finished correctly." 1 Chronicles 28:20
Another Year for Thee

Another year is dawning!
Dear Master, let it be,
In working or in waiting,
Another year with Thee!

Another year of leaning
Upon Thy loving breast,
Of even deeper trusting,
Of quiet, happy rest.

Another year of mercies,
Of faithfulness and grace;
Another year of gladness,
In the shining of Thy face.

Another year of progress,
Another year of praise;
Another year of proving
Thy presence "all the days."

Another year of service,
Of witness to Thy love;
Another year of training
For holier work above.

Another year is dawning!
Dear Master, let it be,
On earth, or else in heaven,
Another year for Thee!
**Thanks Polly**

Dear Heavenly Father,
We come to You tonight in prayer, with the Prayer Warriors around the world, for our friends and family's who are fighting their courageous battles against this terrible disease called cancer. We not only lift these individuals up in prayer but we also lift those who You already know are struggling with other daily battles who also need Your care. We ask You, Lord, to give them peace in their hearts and bodies and lead them to put their complete and total trust in You. We acknowledge You as our Creator, Maker, Great Physician, Eternal Healer, and the one and only I Am. Tonight we ask You to pour out Your healing powers upon our friends and family who battle disease and illness. We specifically pray for Leann, Lisa, Barb, Isaac, and Will along with many other brothers and sisters in Christ. Lord God, take their pain, sadness, worry, doubts and fears--along with their parents and spouses--and replace them with an inner peace that is indescribable and can only be felt through You. Give them strength and courage to continue on the path that You have paved for them. Light their way. Hold them, and their family's, so very close to You so that all they need to do is breathe in and breathe out, for that is all that they can do somedays. Place Your exact chosen people in their paths to help them on their journeys. And, God help us to remember that 'Your will be done'...not our's. I pray that they will place precious their lives into Your powerful hands to give You all the control, just as it should be. You can handle these unbearable struggles so much better than we can... Please ease the pain of those who have lost a loved one and cannot fathom life without them. Help them to cry, help them to heal, help them to find hope and joy once again. Help them to help others by doing Your glorious work. And finally, Lord, we lift our voices to You in praise and thanksgiving for the many, many blessings--big and small--that You have given each one of us in our lives. I pray, Lord, that no matter what the outcome is of each of our situations, YOU WILL ALWAYS GET ALL THE GLORY... In Jesus' precious name, Amen.

Well, tonight I share joy and sorrow. We are so happy and excited that we have a new nephew and cousin in the family! Michelle (Tim's sister) and Ryan are so proud of their adorable son, Hayden Bryce Holm, who arrived yesterday, January 18 at 7:58am. He weighed 7 lbs. 13 oz. and was 19 3/4 in. He has dark hair and he is beautiful!!! His big brother, Carson, is so very proud!!! We saw them last night and oh my goodness...we are all so in love with him!!! And, to carry on Bryce's name is just beautiful and so precious to our hearts... Hayden Bryce is such a gift from God... Life is so precious... Thank you, God.

We also asked for prayers for Austin Peterson's family. Austin is now walking with Jesus... He passed away on Wednesday afternoon. Please, please, please lift them up in prayer for their strength each day and their loneliness for Austin. He was such an incredible little boy, such an inspiration, and a faithful servant. He was so much like our Brycer. I know that they are enjoying their time together now in heaven running, fishing, and playing with no pain or suffering. They are looking at the face of Jesus... Can you imagine?! I ask you to go to Austin's CB page to give them your support. You know how much his parents, Phil and Brandy and brothers, Erick and Gene, will appreciate it... It's God's work. His page is www.caringbridge.org/visit/brandypeterson. Austin has brought so many people closer to God, it's amazing! His legacy of faith, strength, love, and courage will live on forever...

We also ask you to pray for Barb who is an incredible Sister in Christ. She has been led through her difficult journey with the Lord and is now coming to an acceptance that she may be finishing her purpose here on earth. We continue to pray for her MIRACLE with knowing that she has placed her total trust in God's will for her. Her husband, Jim, is God's chosen servant also. His amazing love for his wife leads all of us to be exactly who God created us to be. Please pray for his strength through this journey. God has big plans for him, too. Somedays it is just so hard to see through the clouds. They are both such an image of God's grace. Their love for each other and love for the Lord is beautiful... Barb's CB page is www.caringbridge.org/visit/barbberg. She is such an inspiration and life teacher... She is bringing so many people closer to God--my mission in life, also!

Little Isaac is battling the fight of his life... His family has also been told from the medical team that he may also be completing his purpose on earth. It is one of the most heartwrenching and horrible conversations that a parent ever has to experience in a lifetime... We know all too well... Please continue to pray for Isaac's MIRACLE on earth... He is just so very precious. He has been so brave and courageous. He too is amazing...along with his parents and his 3 brothers. His CB page is www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaaclieser. I know that they would appreciate every prayer and message your send...

I can't even start tonight about us... I must finish and put my energy into prayers for others who have it much worse. Yes, the days have been very difficult. I just want us all to heal in our home, and it's hard to be patient for that. You get frustrated with being sad and missing Bryce so much. But it will all be in God's perfect timing... I trust that with all my heart... I did finally get my courage up to read my updates from a year ago when Bryce was so sick. I shed many tears but I was also reminded of some good conversations that Bryce and I had in our quiet time. It brought back the memories of: him asking me to nap with him, when we would snuggle on the way home from the PITC, and his amazing bravery, strength, courage, compassion, and love for others and for the Lord. Wow... God is so good. Our ELCA (Lutheran) Pastor Mike has been so great and so encouraging. So, I have been reading my Bible daily for about 8 months now. It is something I really NEEDED TO DO since Bryce passed away... It has not only strengthened my faith in God but it has also made my relationship with God stronger and closer. My mission in life is to bring people closer to God and to do what is right in the eyes of the Lord--God help me!... My goal in life is heaven in God's perfect timing... When I leave this earth, I want to see the face of Jesus, I want to meet our Almighty God and thank Him face-to-face, and I want to hug my son again... Life is a gift... Eternal life is a reward... More in a few days. Sending love and prayers to all of you.

"I am the Way, the Truth, and the LIFE." John 14:6
**From Bryce's favorite Bible book marker which has Jesus' picture on the front.

"Walk by faith, not by sight." 2 Corin. 5:7
**Bryce's favorite!!!

"With God all things are possible." Matthew 19:26.
My favorite!

"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
Isaiah 41:10

"Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. Impress them on your children. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates." Deuteronomy 6:5-9
"I will build them up and not tear them down; I will plant them and not uproot them. I will give them a heart to know me, that I am the Lord. They will be my people, and I will be their God." Jeremiah 24:6-7

Bryce was a great fisherman--walleyes, northern pike, and crappies feared him--but he was an even greater fisher-of-men, women , and young people. He'd cast out his love, kindness, thoughtfulness, and generosity--and everyone he met would latch onto that bait and never let go. --By Uncle Brad, Bryce's Fishing Buddy--

Mitchell's scripture reading from Bryce's funeral: Romans 8:30-39. "If God is for us, who is against us?"
Logan's scripture reading from Bryce's funeral: "I lift up my eyes to the hills--where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth." Psalm 121:1-2 That is from one of our favorite songs "Praise You In The Storm" by Casting Crowns.

Sir Bryce Breuer, a young knight, from the land of Goodhue,
Your heart has proved to be brave and true.

A warrior so gallant, courageous and strong,
He is wise beyond years, though this knight be so young,

Sir Bryce wakes to battle and fights valiantly 'til nigh,
Slaying dragons that circle on land and in sky,

He is clad with thick armor 'tis weightless as air,
His sword is our love and his shield is our prayer,

No dragon shall defeat our noble Sir Bryce,
For he is carried forth always by our Lord Jesus Christ.
~By Nyla Hagen, Ellen's mom and our very dear friend~

"But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40:31

We've met many new faces on our son's journey with cancer. We feel the pain of many family's who also struggle with cancer or another life-threatening disease. Please say a prayer for all the little people on 3 Francis of St. Mary's Hospital. Pray for God's healing touch for each one of these children. Pray for strength for each of their family's. And, pray for those who have not yet placed their child in God's hands, to do so. They need to give Him all of the control. With God, we have everything. Without Him, we have nothing. Please continue to send out prayers for all those fighting their battles, like Will, Kristin, Kristina, Griffin, Jackson, Isaac, Melanie, Signe, Teagon, Rachel, Wes, Paul, Heidi, Ethan, Joe, Jamie, Nikki, Brock, Sierra, Ellen, Austin, Kat, Audrey, Barbara, Josh, Rian, & Alyssa. Pray for strength for all of the family's who have lost a loved one to cancer or another disease. These people are all so special to us!!! Give them strength, Lord, and give them peace within.

Take Care & God Bless~

The Breu Crew
Tim & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Tuesday, January 8, 2008 10:04 PM CST
"Be strong and courageous and get to work. Don't be frightened by the size of the task, for the Lord my God is with you; He will not forsake you. He will see to it that everything is finished correctly." 1 Chronicles 28:20
Another Year for Thee

Another year is dawning!
Dear Master, let it be,
In working or in waiting,
Another year with Thee!

Another year of leaning
Upon Thy loving breast,
Of even deeper trusting,
Of quiet, happy rest.

Another year of mercies,
Of faithfulness and grace;
Another year of gladness,
In the shining of Thy face.

Another year of progress,
Another year of praise;
Another year of proving
Thy presence "all the days."

Another year of service,
Of witness to Thy love;
Another year of training
For holier work above.

Another year is dawning!
Dear Master, let it be,
On earth, or else in heaven,
Another year for Thee!
**Thanks Polly**

Good Evening,

OK...here we go again gang. I'm calling out all our Prayer Warrior's... Our buddy, Will Canan, is back in the ring...and swinging. I found out today from Liz, Will's mom, that they are checking out more treatment options for him. He has relapsed again with his medullablastoma--brain tumor. He had Gamma Knife procedure in December. He is Bryce's age. And, what a great kid he is!!! We met Will the first year we went to Camp Jornada. I thought he and Bryce's personalities were so much alike. They didn't end up spending much time together because Bryce was mostly with the nurses because of his treatments we were giving him at the time, and he was starting to get Graft vs. Host Disease also, then--we didn't know that then. He was not comfortable for too much play time. Anyway, Will has this energy about him... He's kinda like a quiet Super Boy, to me...like Bryce. He just wanted to be a normal kid. He is such a friendly guy and playful too! He gave Bryce a Webkinz Lion when Bryce was really sick in January. He cared so much about Bryce. Liz and I connected right away. She and Tom are great. I spoke with Tom this morning, as they are leaving for New York today checking out more options. Again, what a great family! There daughter Katherine is just as great. So, I am asking you to pray non-stop for Will. Pray for his healing and his peace. Pray for their strength with the Lord, only as it should be. Pray for them to feel God's guidance through all the information that they are receiving. Pray for their decisions that they are making with God by their side. And, pray for their peace within... Will's CB page is www.caringbridge.org/mn/willcanan. Please send them many powerful prayers and messages. I know that they will appreciate every one of them. We always did...and still do...

While I'm at it, I want to ask for prayers for more very special friends. These are friends, like family, that we "grew in our faith and journey" with together...through all the HARD STUFF...Deep in the valleys and high on the mountain tops. Ethan and Rachel have scans this month. I just know that their scans will be BEAUTIFUL!!! I also know that it is a very scary time when you have been dealt the hand with cancer in the past--especially when it is your child. No matter how much you believe...you can't help but have a tiny bit of worry in the back of your mind, at times. Let's pray for their peace within, their total and complete comfort and trust in God's plan for their children and their lives, and their FAITH that their child will be healed forever by the Grace of God!!! Worry about nothing, pray about everything. God is good. I know that they will have great results. Thank from the bottom of my heart for the prayers and words of encouragement:. Ethan: new CB "ethanstrenge", and Rachel: new CB "racheltweeten". We love and adore them and their family's so much! In fact, you need to read Julie Tweeten's journal entry from Christmas... I read it that day and cried and cried...and said, "Yes!!! That is what I'm trying to say!" She worded it so absolutely perfectly!!! I wanted to copy and paste the entire entry (but change their children's names, of course...haha). Anyway, these family's are incredible. These children are incredible.

We don't understand why these things happen in life...but God has a plan and His handiwork is on all of it. My mind spins sometimes with all the sickness that is happening in the world. All the sickness that I never knew existed--I only heard stories about it. Now, it is in our home and many other homes also. It's sad to say but it is a fact of life. God never said life would be easy. And so, we lean on Him...with total and complete trust...Faith that NEVER falters...because the enemy will NEVER win. God will get all the glory, just as it should be! Please do not let up on the prayers for peace and healing for everyone!!! Keep the prayers coming for Austin, Lisa, Leann, Isaac, Barb, Don, and Lisa. What struggles they endure everyday. And yet, their faith will NEVER falter. Praise God for their love for the Lord!!! I pray that my Brycer is hanging out with them...giving them strength and peace. We love and appreciate you all! Thank you for all of the wonderful and inspiring messages!!! You are soooooo great!!! We thank God for our friends and family--all of you--every single day!

Of course, I ask you to continue to pray for Lisa who battles her relapse of cancer, LeAnn who is newly diagnosed with cancer, Austin: www.caringbridge.org/visit/brandypeterson, Isaac: www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaaclieser, and Barb: www.caringbridge.org/visit/barbberg. They need our constant prayers. Prayer is such a work of God. Never let up on the prayers for all those suffering and fighting their battles. God bless each and every one of you... May your New Year be filled with God's blessings and strength found only through HIM...

"I am the Way, the Truth, and the LIFE." John 14:6
**From Bryce's favorite Bible book marker which has Jesus' picture on the front.

"Walk by faith, not by sight." 2 Corin. 5:7
**Bryce's favorite!!!

"With God all things are possible." Matthew 19:26.
My favorite!

"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
Isaiah 41:10

"Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. Impress them on your children. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates." Deuteronomy 6:5-9

The St. Cloud Hospital, CentraCare Foundation, and St. Cloud Optimists Clubs are sponsoring the Sixth Annual Minnesota Tree of Hope. The tree will glitter with dozens of gold ribbons each bearing the name of a child who has, or has had cancer. The tree will be displayed at the CentraCare Health Plaza in St. Cloud, MN starting on December 17, 2007.

Please join us for the ceremony on Sunday, January 13, 2008 from 1-4 pm in the Windfeldt Room at the
CentraCare Health Plaza.
1900 Centracare Circle
St. Cloud, MN 56303

We all hope you can attend this very touching ceremony.
Please call the Pediatric Short Stay clinic if you have questions or need directions. (320) 229-4923.

"I will build them up and not tear them down; I will plant them and not uproot them. I will give them a heart to know me, that I am the Lord. They will be my people, and I will be their God." Jeremiah 24:6-7

Bryce was a great fisherman--walleyes, northern pike, and crappies feared him--but he was an even greater fisher-of-men, women , and young people. He'd cast out his love, kindness, thoughtfulness, and generosity--and everyone he met would latch onto that bait and never let go. --By Uncle Brad, Bryce's Fishing Buddy--

Mitchell's scripture reading from Bryce's funeral: Romans 8:30-39. "If God is for us, who is against us?"
Logan's scripture reading from Bryce's funeral: "I lift up my eyes to the hills--where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth." Psalm 121:1-2 That is from one of our favorite songs "Praise You In The Storm" by Casting Crowns.

Sir Bryce Breuer, a young knight, from the land of Goodhue,
Your heart has proved to be brave and true.

A warrior so gallant, courageous and strong,
He is wise beyond years, though this knight be so young,

Sir Bryce wakes to battle and fights valiantly 'til nigh,
Slaying dragons that circle on land and in sky,

He is clad with thick armor 'tis weightless as air,
His sword is our love and his shield is our prayer,

No dragon shall defeat our noble Sir Bryce,
For he is carried forth always by our Lord Jesus Christ.
~By Nyla Hagen, Ellen's mom and our very dear friend~

"But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40:31

We've met many new faces on our son's journey with cancer. We feel the pain of many family's who also struggle with cancer or another life-threatening disease. Please say a prayer for all the little people on 3 Francis of St. Mary's Hospital. Pray for God's healing touch for each one of these children. Pray for strength for each of their family's. And, pray for those who have not yet placed their child in God's hands, to do so. They need to give Him all of the control. With God, we have everything. Without Him, we have nothing. Please continue to send out prayers for all those fighting their battles, like Will, Kristin, Kristina, Griffin, Jackson, Isaac, Melanie, Signe, Teagon, Rachel, Wes, Paul, Heidi, Ethan, Joe, Jamie, Nikki, Brock, Sierra, Ellen, Austin, Kat, Audrey, Barbara, Josh, Rian, & Alyssa. Pray for strength for all of the family's who have lost a loved one to cancer or another disease. These people are all so special to us!!! Give them strength, Lord, and give them peace within.

Take Care & God Bless~

The Breu Crew
Tim & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

Sunday, January 6, 2008 2:40 AM CST
"Be strong and courageous and get to work. Don't be frightened by the size of the task, for the Lord my God is with you; He will not forsake you. He will see to it that everything is finished correctly." 1 Chronicles 28:20
Another Year for Thee

Another year is dawning!
Dear Master, let it be,
In working or in waiting,
Another year with Thee!

Another year of leaning
Upon Thy loving breast,
Of even deeper trusting,
Of quiet, happy rest.

Another year of mercies,
Of faithfulness and grace;
Another year of gladness,
In the shining of Thy face.

Another year of progress,
Another year of praise;
Another year of proving
Thy presence "all the days."

Another year of service,
Of witness to Thy love;
Another year of training
For holier work above.

Another year is dawning!
Dear Master, let it be,
On earth, or else in heaven,
Another year for Thee!
**Thanks Polly**

Good morning,

I'm sorry for the delay in updates. I'm back to the "someday's I just don't know what to write without sounding like a broken record" phase... I use to have the courage and interest to read my old updates of "a year ago" but I haven't been able to since Thanksgiving. It upsets me too much to read about Bryce's suffering and pain. It's reality that he is truly gone from us on this earth. It brings back so many memories of watching him and not knowing if he would survive it or be taken to heaven. We prayed so hard. We asked for God's MIRACLE for Bryce non-stop. We believed... But, God did give Bryce the victory...it just wasn't the victory that we had hoped and prayed for...

There are some good days but I never realized how hard it would be to start a New Year without our Brycer... Continuing "normal everyday life" without him is something we never wished for but something we are forced to accept. It's like a pit in your soul that almost never leaves--unless you get really busy preoccupying your mind with something else. Then, you finish whatever you are doing and "bam!", it's there again. The emptiness and loneliness feelings that remain in your heart and mind and soul are overwhelming. It's so "temporarily permanent" to say goodbye to someone you love--that you never wished to say goodbye to--until you will meet again someday--that you have no clue when it will be. And, everywhere you look, you are reminded of your loved one and his incredible personality, character, and love for life. I am just so grateful to God for the 8 1/2 years we had with Bryce and the memories that were built. I am so grateful for my 4 boys on earth who are also such an incredible gift from God...

I never ever expected to feel so lost and down on New Year's Day. The reality of starting a New Year without Bryce was devastating. We were suppose to be starting the year with all of our children. But, such is the fact that God has plans other than our own... I must say that there is one complete and total comfortable, and confident, feeling that I have received through our entire journey and it is TRUSTING IN GOD'S PERFECT TIMING. You could never convince me that God's timing is not perfect because I honestly have complete trust in it. I'm not sure what the "good outcome" is of our situation of losing our son and brother, yet. But, I do know that God will bring it before my eyes someday. Bryce has already shown us part of God's plan for him, and that is Bryce's legacy of faith, courage, bravery, compassion, and incredible love.

I must say that I have become accustomed to your guestbook entries. The comfort in the messages that you send us is beyond words. I hate to sound needy but you are all good for the soul...and we thank you for that. I sometimes think about closing up Bryce's CB page but haven't felt that strong nudge yet. We sincerely appreciate everyone's support that is given to us, even if it is a silent prayer from near or far. My plan is to have someone print all of Bryce's journal and guestbook entries someday. So, I hope you do feel good about what you have all done for us as servant's of Christ. You are wonderful. I have so much more to say but I am going to try to get back to sleep. Thank goodness this waking up during the night only happens occasionally for me. I'm sure I'll be dragging in the morning.

Of course, I ask you to continue to pray for Lisa who battles her relapse of cancer, LeAnn who is newly diagnosed with cancer, Austin: www.caringbridge.org/visit/brandypeterson, Isaac: www.caringbridge.org/visit/isaaclieser, and Barb: www.caringbridge.org/visit/barbberg. They need our constant prayers. Prayer is such a work of God. Never let up on the prayers for all those suffering and fighting their battles. God bless each and every one of you... May your New Year be filled with God's blessings and strength found only through HIM...

"I am the Way, the Truth, and the LIFE." John 14:6
**From Bryce's favorite Bible book marker which has Jesus' picture on the front.

"Walk by faith, not by sight." 2 Corin. 5:7
**Bryce's favorite!!!

"With God all things are possible." Matthew 19:26.
My favorite!

"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
Isaiah 41:10

"Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. Impress them on your children. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates." Deuteronomy 6:5-9

The St. Cloud Hospital, CentraCare Foundation, and St. Cloud Optimists Clubs are sponsoring the Sixth Annual Minnesota Tree of Hope. The tree will glitter with dozens of gold ribbons each bearing the name of a child who has, or has had cancer. The tree will be displayed at the CentraCare Health Plaza in St. Cloud, MN starting on December 17, 2007.

Please join us for the ceremony on Sunday, January 13, 2008 from 1-4 pm in the Windfeldt Room at the
CentraCare Health Plaza.
1900 Centracare Circle
St. Cloud, MN 56303

We all hope you can attend this very touching ceremony.
Please call the Pediatric Short Stay clinic if you have questions or need directions. (320) 229-4923.

"I will build them up and not tear them down; I will plant them and not uproot them. I will give them a heart to know me, that I am the Lord. They will be my people, and I will be their God." Jeremiah 24:6-7

Bryce was a great fisherman--walleyes, northern pike, and crappies feared him--but he was an even greater fisher-of-men, women , and young people. He'd cast out his love, kindness, thoughtfulness, and generosity--and everyone he met would latch onto that bait and never let go.

Mitchell's scripture reading from Bryce's funeral: Romans 8:30-39. "If God is for us, who is against us?"
Logan's scripture reading from Bryce's funeral: "I lift up my eyes to the hills--where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth." Psalm 121:1-2 That is from one of our favorite songs "Praise You In The Storm" by Casting Crowns.

Sir Bryce Breuer, a young knight, from the land of Goodhue,
Your heart has proved to be brave and true.

A warrior so gallant, courageous and strong,
He is wise beyond years, though this knight be so young,

Sir Bryce wakes to battle and fights valiantly 'til nigh,
Slaying dragons that circle on land and in sky,

He is clad with thick armor 'tis weightless as air,
His sword is our love and his shield is our prayer,

No dragon shall defeat our noble Sir Bryce,
For he is carried forth always by our Lord Jesus Christ.
~By Nyla Hagen, Ellen's mom and our very dear friend~

"But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40:31

We've met many new faces on our son's journey with cancer. We feel the pain of many family's who also struggle with cancer or another life-threatening disease. Please say a prayer for all the little people on 3 Francis of St. Mary's Hospital. Pray for God's healing touch for each one of these children. Pray for strength for each of their family's. And, pray for those who have not yet placed their child in God's hands, to do so. They need to give Him all of the control. With God, we have everything. Without Him, we have nothing. Please continue to send out prayers for all those fighting their battles, like Will, Kristin, Kristina, Griffin, Jackson, Isaac, Melanie, Signe, Teagon, Rachel, Wes, Paul, Heidi, Ethan, Joe, Jamie, Nikki, Brock, Sierra, Ellen, Austin, Kat, Audrey, Barbara, Josh, Rian, & Alyssa. Pray for strength for all of the family's who have lost a loved one to cancer or another disease. These people are all so special to us!!! Give them strength, Lord, and give them peace within.

Take Care & God Bless~

The Breu Crew
Tim & Susie Breuer, Mitchell, Logan, ~Bryce~, Joel, & Ethan

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