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Saturday, January 24, 2009 12:15 AM CST
Hello everyone,
Lots of mental work this past week or so. I felt “fragile” up until the anniversary of Sarah’s death. Fragile meaning, that unprepared-to-take-a-test kind of feeling. It is a weird sensation, but a strong reminder of what I went through 5 years ago. All the growth, pain, change and all the new insight gained during the intervening time has been nothing short of astonishing to me. I am literally a new man. However, my body and mind have not, and probably will not totally forget the deep love we shared throughout our journey together. I was told by some councilors that the feelings associated with the anniversary date of the loved one’s death will gradually subside over time. And that is true, however when those feelings pop up is still somewhat unexpected.
On Thursday, the girls and I and Ralph and Sue went to celebrate a Mass in Sarah’s honor at the Cathedral. It was a beautiful and intimate service. Afterwards, the girls and I went to Sarah’s gravesite and said an Our Father. The girls enjoy finding various objects to put on her grave marker. Later that afternoon, Ralph and Sue took us to Buca-De-Beppo (a lively Italian eatery) to celebrate Sarah’s life. We had a good time, shared stories and chowed down.
On Friday, I decided to clean out some more stuff. (mostly clothes). The girls and I went through a lot of stored stuff and found a total of 11 bags to donate. Several things were old everyday clothes Sarah used to wear. I had not realized how much was saved! Then after we had gone through everything, I discovered why I had kept these ordinary things of hers, it was to remember her. Part of the way I remember various events is to associate things with people. Each time I picked up something of hers, a memory came to mind. Interesting thoughts...
Finally, as the day wore down, I came across two small journals with Theresa and Zoe’s names on them. They were little kid notes Sarah had made concerning each girl. The girls loved to read them and find out what they did as youngsters..... We kept those!
Thanks everyone for your prayers, we do feel them and pray for you too.
Chris
Sunday, January 11, 2009 7:51 PM CST
Hello folks.
Happy ought 9!
Once again, this Christmas season has been a full one. And we have been blessed so very much by all of you! Thank you! The girls got lots of clothes this year and that has been well received. Good thing too, because they are growing like.... flowers. I was going to say weeds, but flowers sounds much better. The food bill is increasing too. Raising a new generation is incredibly rewarding and challenging. It seems like each day I understand what my parents went through a little better. And I grow too.
Sarah’s anniversary is coming up in just a week and a half and in another week and a half is Zoe’s birthday. Memories, memories. Earlier this evening, I saw Dances With Wolves on TV. Sarah really liked that movie, at least the first two thirds of it and I wasn’t sure why.... until today. Her comments and descriptions made sense when I realized that I was identified as the soldier and she was the white indian squaw. It’s funny how all these things come together even years later. So once again, learned something new about her.
I hope all of you have enjoyed this season. Peace and take care.
Chris
Sunday, December 7, 2008 8:00 PM CST
Hi folks.
Well, it is that time of year again. A lot of joy, and memories of sorrow. Two birthdays, Christmas, Sarah’s passing and then another birthday. I don’t believe in coincidences so I believe that Sarah died in the middle of the girl’s b-days because her death day is also her eternal birthday. So, I guess one could say that at this time of year, we celebrate 5 birthdays!
It is wonderful for sure, however it still is a lot of work for dad... errr...Santa. Miss T. turns 12 on the 15th and Ingy turns 7 on the 21st of Dec. Sue mentioned to me the other day that Ingrid is the age Theresa was when Sarah died. Wow how that time has flown by. It has been full for sure, but very quick. 5 years on Jan. 22. It is interesting how one’s mind works when faced with a very high grief load. The first year or so after Sarah’s passing I don’t remember very well. Some things that I thought happened during that time didn’t and some things I thought didn’t happen then actually did. The time seemed to “yoyo” on me.
I would say it took a good 2 to 2 1/2 years to reach a new normal. People still ask how I manage to deal with all this stuff going on and I simply answer, it has to be done. Life takes on much clarity when your options are as straight forward as mine. I was created, prepared and selected for this situation in life. Yes it is very hard at times. But it is through those struggles that I learn even more how important and wonderful it is to take what you have been given and pour it out for others.
I believe that my enjoyment of life has been increased substantially through these challenges. I am constantly reminded how fragile I am and dependent on God’s graces to make life work so well in our home. In reality, I think understanding one’s limits and being humble is the best way to live a full life. And transmitting that message among many to the girls is a great thing.
Take care everyone, you are still in our prayers and I thank those of you who read this from time to time.
Peace and Merry Christmas to you.
Chris
Sunday, November 9, 2008 8:47 PM CST
Greetings everyone,
Once again the days at the K household keep chugging along. The girls continue to grow in body, mind and spirit. And I keep growing along with them.
Just the other day Theresa said, “Dad! Dad! come quickly and listen to what I have done!!” She proceeded to play the E-Bay theme song she just learned on the piano! What a hoot, silly girl. Zoe and Ingrid were writing e-mail letters to their friends in Greek and Portugese (sp). They found a clever way to use the English to whatever language word translator, and created sentences from there.
I know this is a shorty letter, but I am tired tonight. Rest assured, we are all doing fine and we continue to pray for you all.
Peace
Chris
Thursday, October 9, 2008 7:04 PM CDT
Greetings folks.
Life has progressed unabated around here. A few weeks ago, Ingrid showed a book to me titled: “don’t let the pigeon stay up late.” She got it as a birthday gift a couple of years ago, and has just recently began reading it quite well to me. It just so happens that the author has other “pigeon books” that tickle Ingrid’s fancy too. And now she is beginning to read them in earnest. I’ve read countless books to the girls over the years and each girl has taken to reading in a slightly different fashion. Theresa was enthralled with “the story”. The book had to convey a good story for her to be interested. Zoe on the other hand, reads much like me, for information. If the book helps her answer a question, it works for her. And now, it appears that Ingrid gets a big kick out of humorous books. go figure!
Last week we went camping at Pennyrile State Park with a group from the Western Kentucky Amateur Astronomers. The weather was beautiful, the park was a real joy to wander around, and the skies at night were very nice. I got my fix of stargazing with my big telescope and we had fun during the day. Of course, after several nights of 2-4 hours of sleep, my body was rather shot by Saturday! But that is a price I would gladly pay for such fun. The girls want to go back again next year.
This Friday and Saturday, the American Heritage Girls troop 1031 (the girls scouting troop) is having a camp out at the Louisville Astronomical Society’s dark sky site. Since I am a member of the society, they asked if I could set up a program for the scouts. This should be a fun weekend too.
After this, I think that I am all camped out for a while :]
Peace everyone, we love you and pray for you.
Chris and the girls.
Sunday, September 7, 2008 7:55 PM CDT
Greetings all,
Once again time has slipped away from me and I realized that is has been about a month since I last updated. Things have certainly been busy this late summer. Overall, things have been rather melancholy for me. Of course special anniversaries came about during these past few weeks. Sarah’s birthday, the discovery of cancer and our would be 13th anniversary. Despite my efforts to consider them important events of the past, they have a way of making their presence felt in the present. I learned well in grief counciling to just let the feelings flow through me and out. I was reassured by my very seasoned councilor a few years back that certain feelings of loss will never go away. He said to just deal with them in the same way.
I think herein lies the key to processing all kinds of grief. By letting it flow through you, the appropriate feelings are expressed, tears are shed etc. and it moves out of your system. Then, the stronger, wiser, more compassionate person can emerge to move forward. That at least is certainly what has happened to me. Deep grief that is not expressed properly and allowed to flow out, will manifest itself in usually unpleasant ways, such as abusive things, bitterness, anger, insatiable desire for control, etc. Of course having a strong and deep faith to stand upon will keep one from feeling overwhelmed.
Another very important thing I have learned over the years is that doing good for others is a great way to gain perspective and put my “suffering” in proper perspective. It never seems to fail, just when I begin to think I have it tough, a person crosses my path that is in much more dire circumstances. Praying for them and helping out in other ways if possible almost immediately lifts my burdens. God has a great way of keeping us humble!
The girls are doing fine. Actually, they are growing like weeds! Zoe is almost as tall as Theresa now. And Ingrid is fast catching up. Each day I look at them and realize just how blessed I am! Warts and all!
Thanks everyone for continuing to read my sparsely spaced updates. You are in our prayers too.
Peace
Chris
Friday, August 8, 2008 1:44 PM CDT
Hello everyone,
Life is great! It’s 8-8-08!
Sorry for the lapse in judgement... (There are probably thousands and thousands of weddings going on today).
Well, life around here continues to grow and change. The comment I hear most often is how big the girls are getting. Especially, Ingrid. She is as tall as the average 8 year old and she is only 6. The other two girls continue to grow and stretch their minds and bodies too. It is astonishing to me how much they read! It got so bad with Theresa and library books that I told her she could not get more books than what could easily fit into one of her book bags. What was happening was that she would check out 25 or more books at one time and they would spill out onto the ground, or floor or in the car etc. She was rather miffed at me until she realized that her bag would hold around 20 books securely. We hit the library at least once per week.
I know, awe what a terrible “problem” to have, a daughter who reads too much... I pity you!... NOT.
In addition to books, all three girls will get books on tapes and various videos or CD’s.
I want to thank all of you who read my updates on the goings on of the K family. A little bird always says to me, write an update on Sarah’s web page! And that little persistent birdie doesn’t go away until I do...Hmmmm who could that little birdie be?
Peace everyone, and say a prayer for Sarah’s soul. Her 45th birthday would be on Aug 13th.
Chris
Thursday, July 10, 2008 8:20 PM CDT
Hello everyone,
Well the girls and I just completed a camping vacation to the Colorado rockies this past week. We all had a good time in the great outdoors. One of the funniest things was what happened to Zoe within a day of our arrival. She got dirty.... Very dirty! Her feet were black, her knees and lower legs were covered in dirt and she had spots of dirt all over her face. I asked her what on earth was she doing and she simply replied, with her mischievous grin, “I like dirt.” (Of course Ingrid had to follow suit with her bigger sister too.) I had to laugh because what most of you don’t know is that I got the title of “pigpen” as a kid whenever I went camping with family. Dirt seemed to jump on me, especially from around the fire pit... But, I liked it. So, I guess Zoe gets it honestly.
Theresa had a great time fixing some meals for us too. She used our little Coleman stove and managed to cook things without burning them. That says a lot because those little stoves are notorious for heating pans and skillets very quickly and without much fire control.
Overall, we had a nice time. It was short from my perspective, however 4 days at about 10,000 feet, is rather tiring. Especially for us flatlanders.
This afternoon, Ingrid came up to me and asked, “why is poop brown?” Ya just never know what or where these questions come from!
Peace everyone. You are in my prayers.
Chris
Wednesday, June 4, 2008 8:25 PM CDT
Hello everyone.
Family life has been as active as ever during the past month. Folks who have not seen the girls in a while are amazed at how much they have grown in body and in mind. It seems like each day a little bit more of the child fades away and the young lady shows through. The inevitable progression of growth. Yes, it is a little bit sad to see it go.
A few weeks ago, I met a mom at the girl’s American Heritage Girls troop meeting who was carrying her newborn in what I call a “dad bag” baby sling. It brought back many wonderful memories. Mother’s I think are internally genetically linked tightly to their children through pregnancy, birth and childhood. There is that strong mother’s instinct right off the bat. Fathers, on the other hand, have to grow close to their children through interaction.
For me, the most satisfying “bonding” moments came when I held each girl in my “dad bag”. They were totally comfortable, and usually asleep. I remember clearly thinking as I stared at each girl how much of my efforts and energies over the next 20 years or so would be gladly poured into the development of this tiny gift from God. I did not know what the future would hold for her or our family for that matter. But I made a deep commitment to God and to Sarah to make it work in the best way possible.
It is wonderful to know that after these 11+ years of fatherhood, I still have all that passion, love and desire to see these gifts from God develop in the best way possible. Of course raising these beautiful daughters is a little bit more challenging than I had anticipated! But God is faithful. If you do his will, he will give you the strength, wisdom and love to see it through.
In some ways I think the way to be most fully alive is to live for the benefit of others. It is in serving our fellow man, that we become filled.
By golly, I think I just said something profound! :]
Peace all you wonderful people.
Chris
Saturday, May 3, 2008 12:52 AM CDT
Hello everyone.
It’s Derby time here in the river city. Every year the whole town gears up for the derby festival. This year it started a week early with the huge fireworks display. An interesting note, the other evening the girls and I were watching some tv and noticed that the sky all the sudden got rather dark. When I looked outside, a hot air balloon had blocked the sun. Each year as part of the derby festival a balloon race is put on. This year they flew very low right over our house! It was fun to watch. I estimate about 20 25 balloons or so.
Once in a while, Zoe comes up with a crazy idea (and brings along her more than willing accomplice Ingrid). This time it was filling up the sand box with water and playing in the sandy-muddy mess. I said yes.... They had a ball! Of course I forgot the camera, but you have seen them in the mud before. The peals of unbridled joy are really great to hear. A wash off with the hose and a quick bath was all they needed afterwards.
Last Sunday afternoon we ventured over to the Bass Pro Shop. The girls love it and we were able to get some camping supplies too. Theresa was so excited with our new two burner electric light propane stove, that she cooked pancakes on the deck for dinner. We also got some new foldable fabric chairs and a 12 x 12 screened in canopy. All this is in prelude to our trip to the rockies this summer. All the girls really like to camp and that brings a lot of joy to my heart. Sarah had some bad experiences with camping and that tainted her thoughts about it.
I got my labs back the other day and I am keeping this type 1 diabetes thingy in great control. my A1c was 5.8 (that is in the normal range for a person without diabetes). Actually, I prefer to have type 1 to the much more common type 2 diabetes. I think that it is easier to keep in control. However, it can go out faster too!
God has an interesting way of keeping me humble!
Take care everyone,
Peace and know that we love you.
Chris and the girls
Sunday, April 13, 2008 6:38 PM CDT
Good evening everyone.
Life continues to move forward at a steady clip. I sure am ready for spring to come and stay for more than a few days! The girls are a little restless too.
A few weeks ago I heard a radio show discussion on the value of fathers. They picked out a new book titled something like Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters. What impressed me, or should I say reaffirmed my belief, was that daughters who have a strong, active father figure who takes a deep interest in the growth and development of their daughters, exhibit dramatically lower levels of promiscuity, eating disorders, and a whole host of other social struggles often seen in young women. It was good to hear an in depth discussion on the topic. It seems so much anymore that there has been an almost exclusive focus on women and child rearing. Poor dad is relegated to pulling in a paycheck and doing what mom tells him. Have you noticed how dad’s are portrayed in sitcoms?
Anyway, the strong direction and interaction a father can bring to his daughter’s growth is being rediscovered (at least by some) for the real benefit that it is. Yeah!
On to the girls. Theresa has begun to assert herself some more in the kitchen making meals. She really does love to cook, and when she asks to make dinner, I usually agree. Of course she also likes do do everything on her own, and that can often make for rather unusual tasting meals... If you know what I mean! The great thing is that she is learning with each step. After her meals, we talk about what worked and what didn’t and how to improve it. Last week she got a recipe from one of her homeschool friends called violet jelly. The recipe she got was incomplete so I suggested she check for it on line. The net result was that she and Grandma Hughes made a pretty good jar of jelly from violets in the back yard.
Zoe and Ingrid have been busy stretching their minds too. Zoe has a gift for improvisation on the piano. It is really a pretty thing to listen to. She picks up the notes more quickly than Theresa. Miss T. is methodical and precise in learning music (like Sarah I might add!) while Zoe plows through and makes mistakes but quickly finds the right key an moves ahead. She seems to be able to link the notes and fingers together quickly. Ingrid is beginning to get interested in piano stuff too. Ingrid’s creative stories are a real hoot. She can talk to me for 10 to 15 minutes straight without me even saying a single word!
I have been really blessed with three distinct, beautiful daughters who continue to grow and expand. Thank you God.
Peace everyone. Take care of yourselves you are in our prayers too. And enjoy the beauty of spring,.... provided that it ever warms up!
Chris
Friday, March 14, 2008 9:00 PM CDT
Hello all.
Once again time has really flown by since I last updated. Sorry about that.
Well, I finished my large, round mahogany dining table a few weeks back for a very happy customer. She was really amazed at how well it turned out. That always feels good. (so does the final check!). Actually, the client said it was a thousand times better than she imagined it would be. There are few things better in life than using one’s gifts to bring joy to another person. I often feel very fortunate and humbled to be able build such beautiful things for people.
A couple of weeks ago the girls and I took our annual winter trip to Gulf Shores, AL. This year, we did a little detour and visited an much loved Aunt in Mississippi. Aside from the snots and coughs, we all had a good time. The morning before we left to come back to Louisville from Gulf Shores, we were soaking up the sun on the beach. Actually, I got rather hot. Zoe and Ingrid braved the cold ocean and had a ball in the waves. Theresa preferred to just get her legs wet and take long walks along the beach collecting shells. Just mix a little sun, water and sand together and you get happy kids! They had smiles on their faces all week long. Oh yes, I had a good time too! Thanks sister, Mom and Dad!
Easter is fast approaching. I pray that all of you will have a safe and sacred holiday.
Thank you everyone. Our little family continues to grow with your prayers.
Peace,
Chris
Monday, February 11, 2008 8:01 PM CST
Good evening all.
The Lenten season is upon us already. Sometimes time just really seems to move fast! Zoe had her 9th birthday on the second of February. She is such a bubbly, loving girl. She enjoyed her shopping trip with Aunt Linda, gifts from Grandparents, me and her sisters, and especially Grandma’s chocolate cake with chocolate icing! YUM.
A week or so before Zoe’s birthday, we were cleaning the side cabinet and I found several old photo albums and an old journal that Sarah had used. I had not read that journal before so I took some time in the evenings to find out what was in it. It just so happens that this time frame stretched from a few months before Theresa’s birth to a year or so afterward. Sarah was so good at chronicling events, thoughts and feelings that this journal has become a real blessing. So much she wrote about brought back vivid memories for me. There were also some very beautiful words to the “tummy baby” (Theresa) that were certainly dittoed to Zoe and Ingrid.
So on the morning of Zoe’s birthday, I read a page to Zoe, Theresa and Ingrid and let them know that mommy and I felt this way for each one of them. I thought you might like to read it so here it is:
“12-6-96 Dear Baby
I’m sitting here wondering when you are going to be born. My calculations say you’re due 12/10, so you can come out anytime now. I think it would be neat for you to be born today because it’s the day set aside to honor St. Nicholas. You’re moving around inside of me and it feels nice. This has been and very easy pregnancy. Everything has gone very well and like clockwork. I have enjoyed all of it. your Daddy is very very happy also. He talks to you and hums on my tummy so you can hear him. Then you move to let us know you are there.
I think you have big feet and strong legs. You push them out a lot. I have felt your feet for months and months. You also have the hiccups a lot- you have since I first felt you move in the summer (July).
We don’t know if you are a boy or a girl. Your Grandma Krauskopf has said all along that you are a boy. I don’t have a real strong feeling one way or the other. I dream about boys in my sleep, if that means anything. Your Daddy and I don’t care which you are we will love you no matter what.
You have a cute little room with animals on the walls & stars on the ceiling. When you are ready, you can sleep in there, but if you get scared or need to, you can stay with mommy and Daddy.
You know baby, we love you SO very much. Even before I knew you were inside of me, I would put my hand on my tummy and tell you “I love you for whatever you are or might be...” Then when I found out I was pregnant I told you I loved you every day. your Daddy does too and he prays for you every day.
We are so excited to see you and hold you. There are lots of aunts and uncles and Grandparents also. So, when you come out you will be surrounded by love.
We love you with all our hearts.
Mommy.”
Yes, that love is still with us.
Peace everyone,
Chris
Monday, January 21, 2008 8:23 PM CST
Good evening folks.
Tomorrow starts Sarah’s 5th year in eternity. She left her body and us Jan. 22nd. 2004, 7:05 am. While we can’t know precisely where she is, I have had great reassurances over the years that she is not only very happy, but she prays for us constantly.
The changes our family has undergone during the past 4 years has been nothing short of dramatic. We were forced to adapt to life without her. And in doing so, many new doors into our own souls have been opened up.
In my case, the concept of mortality has been and continues to be directly in front of me each day. Since my body does not produce insulin any more, I must take some with each meal. If not, in short order, I would die. Nothing keeps your perspective more rooted in what is really important in life than a reminder as strong as that! But in God’s particular plan for me, this is exactly what I needed to maintain a long term focus on him. I always took good care of my body and because of that, I just expected it to pretty much do anything I asked of it. So when my body broke the night of Sarah’s viewing, I got a very powerful reminder that this body is quite finite, fragile and my priorities needed adjusting!
We are a much stronger, deeper family because of Sarah. She showed us how to die in faith. She always expressed such great confidence in my abilities as a dad. Even when I was a little unsure of what to do. The girls have grown through all this too. They are very beautiful, intelligent, loving young ladies who are so excited about life. In all reality, I cannot imagine a better life than the one we are engaged in right now. We are experiencing the freedom and joy I think Christ wants all of us to have.
I know with great confidence that Sarah is praying constantly on our behalf. Life changes constantly, and all we have is right now. But it is in the time right now that all the decisions of our life are made. I came up with a tag line a few weeks ago and thought I would end this update with it.
“Everything is gift. How we choose to interpret gift influences everything.”
Peace all you wonderful people.
Chris
Thursday, December 27, 2007 7:40 PM CST
Good evening all you wonderful people out there. Merry Christmas!
It has been a very busy and joyous time around here. Theresa was beaming from ear to ear all day when her birthday came by. Eleven years already! Wow! She summed up her day when I put her to bed and we said prayers. She said, “Dad, I am very happy.” I smiled, kissed her and left the room thinking, what a wonderful thing for a child to feel.
Ingrid’s birthday was the 21st but we had both her and Theresa’s birthday dinner at Grandma and Grampa Pal’s house on Theresa’s birthday the 15th. A wonderful surprise came about in the form of a package from Gretchyn Bailey to Ingrid. Ingrid opened it up on her birthday and what came out melted my heart! A Poodle skirt that Sarah had made 5 years ago! Sarah had made it for Gretchyn’s daughter. A note fell out and we read it. Alexa decided to give the poodle skirt to Ingrid as a gift, just as she received it from Sarah years ago. What a beautiful, beautiful thing to do! Thank you Gretchyn and Alexa!
Ingrid immediately put on the skirt and wore it for 3 days! Now each of the daughters has a poodle skirt that Sarah made. I often wished she could have made one for Ingrid before she got sick and died. And now, in a vicarious way, she gave Ingy a wonderful gift through the hands of some dear people. Thank you so very much my dear!
The Krauskopf Christmas party on the 22nd went well too. It is always good to catch up with family and friends whom I don’t see very often and of course, eat!
Thank you everyone. We are profoundly grateful for the gifts, love and prayers you continue pour upon our little family. I am often just amazed at how blessed we are by all of you!
Peace, and may Christ guide you to the fullness of truth.
Chris
Thursday, December 13, 2007 8:54 PM CST
Good evening all you wonderful folks.
The celebration season is upon us! Not only are the birthdays fun, but we as a family are growing more deeply in our faith too. It seems like each year around this advent time, we learn something new. The girls are growing by leaps and bounds and with that, their understanding of the season develops.
Speaking of growing, Theresa is 5’2” tall now! She seems taller because she likes to walk around on her toes. Soon, very soon she will grow into that “great unwashed stage” as Sarah liked to call it. The other girls are not far behind. Ingrid is substantially taller than the other girls at the same age. So my guess is that she will be my Amazon Princess.
Ingrid loves to talk too. Imagine that?! Yesterday, I was working in my shop on the latest project and Ingrid approached me and said, “ dad, I feel sad.” I asked her to tell me about what was wrong. She started off with a scary dream that morphed into some kind of grassy field and it went all over the place from there! She spent a full 18 minutes talking about everything under the sun, none of which had any bearing on the initial subject. I didn’t even say a single word. My presence was enough, what a wonderful girl.
Today also brings back some feelings of loss for me. It was Dec. 13, 2003 that I learned from the doctor that Sarah’s cancer had metastisized to the brain. It is kind of funny how the mind and body remember events like that and then brings them to conscience thought at the appropriate time. At the time I found out about the brain cancer, both Sarah and I were not overly worried because of the doctor’s confidence about being able to treat the tumors with high levels of focused radiation. Well, as time showed, one of the tumors did not get the message and told her to stop breathing.
But to end things on a high note, I am certain that Sarah is and has been praying for this family from day one. Because we truly a very blessed family in so many ways.
Peace to all of you this Christmas season. Thank you so very much for the wonderful prayers.
Chris
ps Ralph is doing well.
Sunday, November 25, 2007 7:34 PM CST
Good evening everyone.
Yes, it has been a very long time since updating. My internet service connection has been messed up for almost 3 weeks! I upgraded to a new OS and that finally took care of the problem. Anyway, Ralph’s surgery for breast cancer went very well. The surgeon removed 4 lymph nodes around the area and they all tested negative for cancer. However, the tumor impinged upon a blood vessel thereby moving his cancer stage from I to II. That requires chemo as a follow up. It will start later this week. Overall he and Sue are doing well.
Thanksgiving was a mixed bag this year for me. I spent a lot of time at night in front of the toilet with a stomach bug. Ugh. The girls spent a delightful day at Grampa and Grandma house and enjoyed the wonderful dinner. While I was sick, I was no less thankful for all that has been afforded us. To me, everything is a gift, even this body and the very air we breath.
So, we now start the 2 month celebration time of the year. Thanksgiving, two birthdays, Christmas, New Years and finally Zoe’s birthday. I let the girls know often that this is truly a fun time of year around here!
Peace everyone, I pray for you often.
Chris and the girls.
Wednesday, October 24, 2007 7:19 PM CDT
Good evening everyone.
I hope all is well with you and yours. The other day we found out that Grampa Pal (Ralph) has breast cancer! A biopsy indicated cancerous cells in a small lump inside his left breast. Just today A doctor at the VA found a lymph node in his left arm pit. Surgery is planned for this week or early next week, (mastectomy) and lymph node removal, followed by chemo. Once again cancer rears it’s ugly head. Please pray for him and Grandma Sue. Pray for their strength, endurance and peace of heart. All of it is doable and things must progress one day at a time. All of us are well aware that we only have today, right now to live and make a difference. Sarah, pray for your dad’s complete healing. You’ve got a better vantage point for efficacious prayers!
In other news, the girls are growing like crazy. Zoe asked me several times last week for permission to “jump on an egg with her bare feet”. After constantly saying no, I finally relented and she did it. Outside of course! Ingrid was so impressed that she did one too! Theresa took photographs. Silly girls! They showed true delight on their faces.
Earlier in the week Zoe wrote a poem for me to keep in her school records book. I’ll quote it for you. It’s called; “If I found a foot long diamond”
If I found a foot long diamond, I’d break off some for charity some for friends and family. Some to make a library, some for the poor and hungry. Some for the Church and the last bit for me.
What is so neat about this poem is that it is just how she views life. What a special girl.
Theresa has been busy devouring books and writing. Lately, she has been writing graphic novels. One every couple of days. In the evening, she, and Zoe stand behind me when I’m in the rocking chair reading them to Ingrid for her bedtime story. They are really expressive, imaginative and humorous... in a ten year old girl kind of way. I think Miss T. is up to novel number 13 now.
The girls enjoy camping too. Sarah never liked the idea. Of course the one story she told me of camping included a wet, soggy sleeping bag, cold, mosquito infested event with lousy company. I was never able to get her to believe that it could actually be fun. Two weeks ago the girls and I went to the Twin Lakes Star Party in western Kentucky. There were about 100 amateur astronomer / campers there. Within 5 minutes of our arrival, the girls found friends and had a great time. I had the opportunity to share my big telescope with lots of folks and compare views with many others. It was a great time for me too. Theresa said to me one quiet evening, “dad, I really like camping”. She especially liked making breakfast on the little propane grill.
Well everyone, rest assured you are in our prayers.
peace
Chris
Tuesday, October 2, 2007 6:23 PM CDT
Hi all. Just a shorty today.
Yesterday I turned 45. Funny feelings go through your head when you clearly remember what your folks looked like at the same age your are now! Last weekend was fun. I went on a fishing trip with my dad, 5 brothers and 1 brother-in-law. We caught perch, blue gill and some pumpkin sunfish. When we all get together, you would think that we were all in high school again. The girls spent the weekend with Grandma K. and my sisters. A good time was had by all.
Life keeps going at a steady clip around here. Each day holds something new, something to be learned and something to look forward to. I pray that your life holds the same.
Peace everyone.
Chris
Sunday, September 9, 2007 1:34 PM CDT Good afternoon all you who are still keeping in touch. Friday, August 17, 2007 3:32 PM CDT Hello everyone, Friday, July 27, 2007 7:03 PM CDT Good evening all, Saturday, June 30, 2007 8:33 PM CDT Good evening all, Sunday, June 10, 2007 2:02 PM CDT Good afternoon everyone Saturday, May 26, 2007 7:49 PM CDT Hello folks, Wednesday, May 2, 2007 4:35 PM CDT New photos, check them out. Friday, April 27, 2007 8:12 PM CDT Hello everyone, Wednesday, April 18, 2007 8:46 PM CDT Good evening all Monday, April 2, 2007 10:06 PM CDT Hello everyone, Monday, March 19, 2007 3:21 PM CDT Hi everybody. Friday, March 2, 2007 6:30 PM CST Hello everyone! Wednesday, February 7, 2007 6:42 PM CST Hello all, Monday, January 22, 2007 7:50 PM CST Well, here it is. Sarah’s third birthday in heaven. I know it sounds kind of trite to say it that way, but it really is true. Her suffering ended, and that was a relief albeit very bittersweet. Our lives here are sandwiched between two ends of eternity; all the time before we came, our very short existence now, and the eternity that awaits us after we pass. That makes what we do with our lives now so very, very important. Because it is in the now that we choose which direction we enter into eternity through the actions of our lives. Friday, January 5, 2007 4:56 PM CST Happy ought 7 everyone. Saturday, December 9, 2006 1:30 PM CST Hello everyone. Thursday, November 23, 2006 6:36 PM CST Happy Thanksgiving everyone! Saturday, November 4, 2006 7:31 PM CST Hello everyone, Thursday, October 12, 2006 8:23 PM CDT Good evening all. Sunday, September 17, 2006 2:18 PM CDT Hi everybody
Thursday, August 24, 2006 8:06 PM CDT Good evening everyone. Thursday, August 17, 2006 7:02 PM CDT Good evening all. Thursday, August 10, 2006 7:26 PM CDT Hello everyone. Thursday, August 3, 2006 10:47 PM CDT Hello everybody, we are back. Wednesday, July 26, 2006 9:05 PM CDT Greetings all from BIG SKY country! Monday, July 17, 2006 6:00 PM CDT Good evening everyone. Monday, July 10, 2006 8:08 PM CDT Good Monday evening everyone. Tuesday, July 4, 2006 7:17 PM CDT Happy 4th of July everyone! Monday, June 26, 2006 12:38 AM CDT Hi everyone! Sunday, June 18, 2006 6:42 PM CDT Happy father’s day! Tuesday, June 13, 2006 8:39 PM CDT Hello everyone, I hope you are having a good week. Sunday, June 4, 2006 7:13 PM CDT Hi everybody. Sunday, May 28, 2006 5:12 PM CDT Good afternoon everyone and happy memorial weekend. Sunday, May 21, 2006 7:00 PM CDT Hello all. Saturday, May 13, 2006 10:00 PM CDT Happy mother’s day. Sunday, May 7, 2006 5:04 PM CDT Good evening everyone. Wednesday, May 3, 2006 7:04 PM CDT Good evening all. Thursday, April 27, 2006 4:07 PM CDT Good evening everyone. Thursday, April 20, 2006 7:17 PM CDT Good evening all. Friday, April 14, 2006 9:06 PM CDT Good Friday everyone. Saturday, April 8, 2006 8:24 PM CDT Good evening all. Thursday, March 30, 2006 8:32 AM CST Hi folks. Thursday, March 23, 2006 7:54 PM CST Good evening all. Friday, March 17, 2006 7:46 PM CST Good evening everyone. Monday, March 13, 2006 10:14 AM CST Greetings folks from Gulf Shores, AL. Sunday, March 5, 2006 11:26 AM CST Good afternoon everybody. Saturday, February 25, 2006 9:11 PM CST Hello again everyone. Sunday, February 19, 2006 12:11 AM CST Hello everyone. Sunday, February 12, 2006 6:50 PM CST Good evening all. Monday, February 6, 2006 8:22 PM CST Good evening everyone. Monday, January 30, 2006 7:23 PM CST Hi everybody Monday, January 23, 2006 10:08 PM CST Hello everybody. Tuesday, January 17, 2006 8:23 PM CST Happy Tuesday everyone. Wednesday, January 11, 2006 8:25 PM CST Good evening folks. Wednesday, January 4, 2006 6:59 PM CST Hello everybody
On the 6th of Sept. would have been Sarah and my 12th anniversary. Boy, what an interesting perspective one gets of that date when a spouse passes on. I have felt a little melancholy during the past few days and I know where it came from.
I was talking to a friend of mine the other day of what happened to me when Sarah died. A profound statement came out of my mouth that summed up quite well the whole event. I said that when Sarah died, I died too. All my hopes, dreams and our plans for the future together simply vanished. The profound grief that followed indicated the depth to which our love was strong. Also, her death opened up the door to a much deeper understanding of and growth in faith.
I changed, expanded and became a different person through that time. Unlike divorce, it was a profound gratitude for what was experienced not anger or resentment. A thankfulness for all that she gave and brought into the world (T Z and I among other things). A councilor told me early on in the grief process that in time a “new normal” would be achieved in the family. I understand that now. We as a family have been catapulted into this new normal. For the girls, it does not seem so profound. I guess because they still have dad around. But for me, I have gained a deeper appreciation for life, deeper compassion for others and a better view of the larger picture in life.
I wish that things would magically get easier with fewer struggles but the deeper knowledge of the importance of my role in life right now is pretty good consolation. Suffering and struggles are an important ingredient for the salvation of souls. And I know that God has very special plans for me and my family.
Thank you everyone. Happy anniversary my dear.
Peace to you.
Chris
Sarah would have been 44 on Monday the 13th. In honor of her physical absence, we had swimming and dinner with the Grandparents. Dump cake was served for dessert. Dump cake for all of those of you who don’t know is a very yummy concoction similar to apple crisp. “Dump” refers to the action of dumping in the filling with the cake mixture plus a few other ingredients prior to cooking. Of course ice cream is served with it too! Sarah loved dump cake, and so do we.
Yesterday we hit 105 officially in Louisville. That is the second highest temperature ever recorded in August. But thankfully, that was the end of the intense heat wave that gripped us for the last couple of weeks. Now the temperature will only reach into the mid or lower 90’s. After all, it is still August in Kentucky.
The girls continue to expand in wonderful ways. All three are shooting up and this weekend Theresa is camping with one of her good home school friends. Zoe is at another home school friend’s house for the day. So that leaves Ingy with me. Ingrid is so imaginative. She is playing with homemade play dough right now and, of course, has a complete narrative going on with herself!
Officially, the start of the academic year record keeping for me co-insides with the start of the public school year here in Jefferson county. (August 14.) The girls however, don’t notice any difference because they are joyfully learning year round. If anything, summer increases the learning activity because more things take place outside. But during the past couple of weeks, a place with AIR CONDITIONING has been the best place to be.
As far as I am concerned, 1 furniture job is pending, 1 is in the wings and 1 telescope making job is due to start in November. The first two jobs could turn into several more for these particular clients. They saw my work at the Louisville Home Remodeling Show last summer and have decided that I am their man. Good for them!
Take care everyone. Thank you for your prayers.
Chris
Life continues to move along well around here. If there is one thing for sure, children keep you in the present. Aspects of life happen right now. So it is not surprising to find out that it has been almost a month since the last update.
I have found some recent pictures of the girls and me and have posted them to the photo page. As always they are really growing into wonderful young ladies.
Thank you all for your prayers. We really appreciate all that you do for us.
Peace,
Chris
The last few weeks have slipped by in an big hurry. It seems that when one is busy, time flies. That has surely been the case with us lately. The Colorado Star trip we took was fun. However the skies at night were poor. An unusual high thin layer of coluds seemed to be persistent all night long for 3 nights! The directors of the star party said that it was very unusual. Of course I know why it was cloudy, I brought my newly made telescope there. And Murphy’s law for astronomy states that the night sky is always lousy when you want to try out a new scope. I did manage to get a few objects in view for folks to see. I thought they were just so-so, but other floks thought they were very nice indeed. I won an award for technical design and also the grand prize drawing! ( a new little refractor telescope)
The girls meanwhile have been up to their usual things. Theresa is growing taller and thinner, but that hasn’t slowed her down any. The other day she put on a one girl show of Romeo and Juliette for me, Ingrid and Zoe in the basement . Complete with costume changes and dialogue. It was great. She followed the storyline to a T. A couple of days later, she and Zoe created their own play, it was fun too. Miss T also made dinner for all of us the other night. It was home made chicken nuggets and a noodle soup. We ate it all! It was quite good!
Zoe had a fun time at her friend’s house. Her friend had a birthday party and invited Zoe over for a slumber party and a trip to a local water park. Now she is snoring like crazy :]
Ingrid too is stretching out and growing up. We were at grandma and grampa pal’s pool the other day and she was right on the verge of swimming. It won’t be long now. It is wonderful to see them all grow so much. I know that this time is short indeed. My goodness, Theresa is already 10 1/2! I moved a dresser out of her room the other day that was the right height for Sarah and me to use to change her diapers! I can remember so clearly her funny giggle when we tickled her belly during diaper changes. Sarah would hold her feet up and blow on her toes. What great memories! And they seem like yesterday.
Yes, it is good to be here.
Peace everyone, You are in our prayers.
Chris
Summer is upon us and that means camping. I love to camp and the girls are growing to like it too. Sarah, on the other hand hated camping. The few experiences she told me about would leave that impression on me too!
This year we are going to the Colorado rockies for a “star party”. Star parties are usually annual camping events sponsored by a local astronomical society (aka telescope geek club). The event the girls an I are going to is sponsored by the Colorado Springs Astro Club. It is one of the more popular and well established events. Folks come to the high plateau (8800 feet) in mid-June to set up telescopes and watch the beautiful night sky. This year they expect 350 + people. There are lots of kids and families involved too so it should be a great time for the girls as well. I will bring a couple of my scopes and who knows I may get an order or two to make one for someone! We leave this coming Wednesday am. I am looking forward to a nice few days.
Big news! Ingy lost her first tooth. And sure enough, she actually lost it within a couple of minutes of having it come out of her mouth! She was very distraught because she was sure the tooth fairy would not come if her tooth was gone. Theresa jumped in and suggested that she write a letter to the tooth fairy explaining the problem and stick that under her pillow. It worked ;] .
The girls have also started the annual swim-at-the-grandparents-pool time. They just picked up right where they left off! Ingrid is much bolder and dog paddles around. Theresa and Zoe are like fish. Zoe especially enjoys the deep end. What special gifts they really are!
Thanks everyone for reading. Your prayers are most appreciated too!
Peace
Chris
Goodness it’s been almost a month since I last updated!
Life is chugging along here just as usual. The girls continue to expand their minds in a relentless pursuit of information. It is so wonderful to see the unbridled enthusiasm take over when they discover, create or find out something new. As part of my home schooling requirements for Kentucky, I have been keeping track of all this. The state requires that the standard subjects be tracked and evaluated, as well as keeping attendance in sync with the local public school system.
The reality is that the girls are learning so much on a daily basis that it is often a challenge for me to pare it all down into the narrow fields that the state requires! For example, Theresa read almost 80 books last month alone! The subjects ranged from an in depth discussion of Archeology and Egyptology to fun kid books on a Series of Unfortunate Events, series. Zoe is deep into the Magic Tree House Series. Ingrid is getting into the act too. She is constantly asking me how to spell words so that she can type them on the computer. We also play car spell frequently when driving. The library, zoo, science center, etc. are standard destinations on a regular basis. The zoo can be extra fun at times because we are friends with the head veterinarian. Often the girls get to go behind the scenes so to speak and learn and do various activities with him!
Lately, the girls have been into writing, publishing and illustrating news letters for a group of home schooled students. They have even created their own version of monopoly. All three of them truly are a gift from God.
As for me, I am doing well. This is a very big job raising these three girls, and sometimes the weight of responsibility is quite heavy, but I have been blessed with the right gifts to make it all happen. (A lot of time spent in prayer doesn’t hurt either!) So often when I look around at other folks and their struggles and trials, I realize how incredibly blessed I really am.
Thanks everyone! Have a very good Memorial Day, Thank a Vet!
peace
Chris
Peace,
Chris
A busy and exciting weekend is upon us. On Saturday, the older girls are going to a friend’s house for a birthday party. Ingrid gets to stay with grandma Hughes for a few hours while I serve at a wedding at the Cathedral. Then Sunday Zoe receives her first Eucharist. This is a big event around here.
For those of you who don’t know, First Eucharist is a time when we Catholics celebrate a new comer to the table of the Lord. We Catholics believe that when the priest consecrates the wheat bread wafer and the wine as Jesus instructed him to do, they become changed into the body, blood, soul and divinity of Christ. They become transubstantiated into our lord as spiritual food for the journey through life. Thus Jesus becomes present to us and enters into our body in a unique and substantial way. This is the heart of what it means to be Catholic. And Zoebo is about to join Theresa and me in this wonderful and mysterious reality. We are having a nice get together at my place afterwards.
Yesterday, the girls were especially whiney and irritating. So, as the rain was coming down, Zoe asked if she could get wet. I said sure and take your sisters with you too! Well, within a few minutes they found a mud hole! I told them to go for it and they had a ball! It was a riot. The whineys went away too. Silly girls!
Take care everyone, thank you so very much for all your prayers for us. Be safe.
Chris
Easter Sunday brought with it great joy as well as some pain for me. Even though I try to ignore feelings of loss, these very special days bring back memories of Sarah in a powerful ways. Since they only come by once a year, they seem to pack an emotional wallop of grief. This Easter Sunday was no exception. As I was driving to my sister’s new house, I put in a CD to listen to some music that Sarah enjoyed. I enjoyed the CD. Then a song I did not expect came on. It was “O mangu Mysterium” (sp). That was Sarah’s favorite song to sing with the chior, and it was the one which the chior sang for her during her funeral Mass. It was also during that song at the funeral Mass that Sarah let me know in very certain ways that she was happy and OK! 3 and 1/2 years ago was the last time I heard that song. When it came on the CD, I my eyes were instantly flodded with tears. WOW what a powerful impact! It was so beautiful and it brought back richness, grief and memories that I can’t even describe. After the song was over, I was drained physically and emotionally. Then I felt Sarah laugh and say, “gotcha!” So I immediately laughed and called her butt head! Silly girl.
A couple of weeks ago Zoe was helping clean up and she accidentally knocked the computer off the desk on which it sat. Unfortunately, it hit the floor so hard that it broke the case and ruined it. She felt awful and I didn’t help matters with my reactions to the accident. Fortunately, the data was recovered from the hard drive and we now have new (2year old) Imac. The whole thing taught me an interesting lesson. I relied so heavily on the computer for so long that when it was gone, it was rather difficult to adjust. In a sense, plastic, glass and metal had become a crutch for me. I didn’t like that reality.
We have a big weekend for Louisville. The worlds largest fireworks show “Thunder over Louisville” is Saturday evening at the waterfront park. 40 to 50 tons of fireworks are blasted into the sky after and all day air show. Within a couple of years, I will take the girls to see the show.
Peace everyone. You are in our prayers.
Chris
I hope everyone is doing well. The other night after I got the girls in bed, I sat down in front of this computer and let out a big sigh. Raising 3 girls is a lot of work! It is wonderfully rewarding and very demanding at the same time. Some days it just hits me that I am in the middle of a really big and incredibly important job. It is truly a blessing to be constantly reassured by Christ that his grace is enough for me.
Easter is almost here! This has been a great 40 days of Lent for me. This year I have changed a few things and decided to focus my energies outward and pray for, and offer Masses for specific persons that I know well and love instead of just concerning myself. Heaven’s knows that there are many people to pray for! The net result has been a wonderful sense of accomplishment. A real sense of giving to those in need.
This Friday the girls get to go to their aunt’s house for the Easter weekend, while I get a chance to celebrate by serving at the Easter Vigil Mass on Saturday evening. The Easter Vigil Mass is the oldest and most important celebration in the Church. I am pretty sure it started during the 140’s to 180’s A.D. In reality all the Easter celebrations are wonderful. Sunday afternoon, I will have dinner with my sister and then bring the girls back home. This has kind of become an Easter tradition.
Well everyone, peace to you. Celebrate our risen lord with your family and friends at Church!
Chris
Well, we made it. We had a nice trip to Gulf Shores, AL, a couple of weeks back. The girls are getting better and better at traveling, (which means fewer and fewer stops). It doesn’t hurt to leave at 1:30 am either! Each day was sunny and warmer than the previous day. The Gulf was pretty cool, but that didn’t stop the girls. I remember looking up and down the beach as far as the eye could see and the only place where people were in the water was right in front of me, MY girls! The played for a long time each day in the surf. I read a long book during the first half of the week, and played in the water BRRRRRR!!! and sand with the girls the rest of the week. Grandma and Grampa K. were wonderful hosts. The condo also had a pool which was used extensively by the girls. If there was water available, the girls were in it!
We brought the warm weather north with us when we left Gulf Shores. However it didn't last. I took several pictures, however they always show the girls facing the water! I forgot to have them turn around. The girls are truly a gift.
Peace everyone.
Chris
Spring is near, I can feel it. This next week, the girls and I are going to Gulf Shores, AL for a week of sun, sand and surf. I know, it sounds rough but someone has to keep and eye on the grandparents! The girls are really fired up. They have been counting down the days for over 6 weeks.
Each girl continues to grow. Zoebo decided the other day to do a prescribed exercise routine to figure out which activities made her heart rate accelerate the fastest. Then she wrote them down and made “gym world” in the basement with Theresa’s help. I taught her to calculate her heart rate by counting the beats in 6 seconds, then adding a zero.
Theresa has been into publications a lot lately. Making publications like recipe books, calendars (complete with monthly illustrations), a Krauskopf world record book, and numerous pages of drawings complete with hilarious commentaries. T and Z are flooding their minds with books from the library too. It is not uncommon for them to get and read 20 books or more each week.
Ingrid is becoming more interested in reading books too. She doesn’t want to be left behind! It is amazing sometimes the words she asks me to explain. Today she asked me to explain the word “insolent”. Yesterday it was “determine”. Her mind too is expanding.
I am doing well too.
Take care everyone.
Peace
Chris
Things continue to move along here. Zoboe’s 8th birthday was the third of this month. It was cute to watch her. All week she was getting more and more excited about the weekend. When Saturday arrived, she was treated “royally’ by Theresa and Ingrid. Her sisters made a special breakfast-in-bed of heart shaped pancakes and special syrup. Ingrid made her blanket “blue blee” sing wonderful tunes for Zoe.
Late that morning we had lunch at Zoe’s favorite restaurant the Golden Corral. It was especially nice because we were surrounded by a good sized contingent of the 82nd Airborne in for lunch. They were preparing for shipping out orders. I thanked them from the bottom of my heart for doing what they do to protect my family. All of them were courteous, decent men and women.... And they ate like horses!
We finished up the evening at Grandma and Grampa Hughes house. Zoe was quite happy with all the gifts she received from everyone. She is such a special girl. All bubbly and full of life. Thank you everyone for all you do for us.
Peace,
Chris
Sarah’s passing has helped me to grow tremendously in my faith journey and in the understanding of our Holy Catholic Church. I was always a pretty good Catholic man before she died. After her death, my faith was tested to the max. It was at that point that I wanted deep, probing answers to a lot of big questions. I wanted to know the “why’s”. For many years, I did what I was “supposed” to do. Now that wasn’t good enough. So over the past few years, I have been learning and understand the why’s. And each day, I am more and more astounded with the wisdom, depth, and truth that is the Church. Christ certainly knew what he was doing when he gave Peter the keys to the kingdom!
Growing in faith has also helped me to grow in peace. And that is a wonderful gift to be given when you are raising 3 active girls! This is my role now. Raising the girls is indeed a challenge, but it is one that I welcome with open arms and a joyful heart. The time they are here with me is so short and in a blink of an eye, they will be making their own way. So it is really an honor and a blessing for God to choose me for this situation. Always, always Sarah’s life breathes through them. And each day, I know she is smiling!
Peace my dear, pray for us.
Chris
We had a great Christmas / birthday season. It seemed like we were celebrating constantly from Thanksgiving through new years. Thank you everyone for your generosity to us. We felt quite honored by what so many of you did. I keep kicking myself saying what did we do to deserve such kindness? So the best thing I can think of is to accept what you gave to us with a humble heart. All of you are wonderful.
The girls just continue to grow. They really do love each other very much. That was always so important to Sarah and me. The are maturing and taking the initiative more and more. Sometimes a little too much initiative? Theresa loves to cook and is getting better and better all the time. However, sometimes she plows straight ahead through a fairly complicated recipe without asking for any assistance and the result is rather bad. At that point she often gets upset and storms off. But, a little while later we go back through the recipe and discover a missed ingredient or two. After that she feels much better and doesn’t make the mistake again.
All the girls have developed this style of learning. Plow ahead without direction from me, then see how it turns out. If something doesn’t work, then ask dad. Through this process, the are beginning to see how effective making a plan can be before jumping in.
On New Years night, Zoe and Theresa slept out in their play house (in the back yard). They cleaned it all out, and then blew up the inflatable mattress. When they went to bed, I buried them in blankets. They came back in at around 5 am because UPS jets were taking off over their heads. I was impressed. It was breezy and 25 degrees that night.
Well, thank you all for reading this web site from time to time. I know that I am not updating it as often as before but I do not plan on forgetting about it. This is part of my service to all of you. Letting you know how Sarah’s daughters are faring in the world.
Peace everyone.
Chris
I have a few free minutes this afternoon so I thought I would write an update. As most of you know, this is a very busy time around here. Theresa will be 10 on the 15th and Ingrid will be 5 on the 21st. It is amazing how fast time really moves. All the girls are growing into beautiful young women. Each has their own distinct personality. Sarah would probably recognize Ingrid as the most like her in temperament.
I continue to take each day one at a time. The girls do not have great expectations for gifts or material things during this season. They are quite happy with one or two items chosen with feeling. We do have a special thing that we do on Theresa’s and Ingrid’s birthdays. On the 15th, we decorate our 15 foot living blue spruce in the front yard. (Most of the time all the girls just sit inside and watch me through the front window.) On Ingrid’s birthday, the 21st, we set up and decorate the inside tree. I remember a couple of years ago the girls were so enamored with certain heavy ornaments that they pulled the tree over! It is quite a kick to watch them choose particular ornaments.
This time of year also brings back a lot of not so fun memories. Occasionally, I will find myself feeling sad that Sarah is not here in body form anymore. Three years ago, this was the start of the “end game” for her and us. A lot went on during that last month of her life. It has left a deep mark on me and the girls. Last week I just really missed hearing her voice. A couple days ago, Ingrid was moving the piano bench. It tipped over and spilled out a lot of music. Well, inside was a small, unmarked cassette. I stuck it into the player to see if anything was on it. It was Sarah singing in the choir loft at church! Things like that happen frequently to me. It is very nice to know we have a special angel to watch over us and pray for us. Thank you my dear.
Peace to all of you this Christmas season.
Chris
What a great way to start this special season. I was driving back home this evening and was struck with how very many blessings have come my way. Then the thought crossed my mind, How?! How can I even begin to thank God for everything? It seems the older I get, the more I realize that ALL of life and everything in it is a gift to be profoundly thankful for. The good times are a joy in themselves and the bad times draw us closer to God.
The girls and I had a wonderful turkey dinner complete with pumpkin pie at Grandma and Grampa Hughes house this afternoon. Afterward we went through a bunch of old photographs of the Hughes family growing up. There were many of Sarah in there and we were able to compare them to the girls now. There seems to be a pretty even mix of looks (50:50 Sarah and me) in the girls. Although some young ones of Sarah look very much like Ingrid.
Speaking of Ingrid, the other day at breakfast she came up to me and said, “I’m entertaining the notion of wearing pants.” I just gave her a big smile and tickled her belly. No doubt she has been listening to her older sisters talk again. What is fascinating is how she picks up sophisticated words and then uses them correctly in a different context than when she heard them in the first case.
Thank you everyone so very much. We are truly blessed by you! Have a great day and Christmas season.
Chris
Ingrid is in bed and the two older girls are at a friends house for the night. That leaves me with a nice quiet evening. I love the girls very much and I also cherish my quiet, alone time. Silence is a great way for me to recharge. It is important for daddy to recharge!
Last Tuesday for halloween, Theresa dressed up like a “corpse queen”, Zoe was dressed up in a USO sailor outfit, and Ingrid went out as a princess. The evening was a little drizzly and cool, but that didn’t dampen their enthusiasm. This year I decided to take them on a little different route. The net result was 10 1/2 lbs of candy! They were all complaining of sore feet when we got back. We really didn’t go that far, but I told them that they must carry their own bags all the way. Trick or treating also gives me a chance, however brief, to talk to neighbors. People around our little neighborhood seem to be doing pretty well. So all in all, we had a good time.
Birthday / Christmas season starts up pretty soon too. From Thanksgiving through Valentines day it is like a continuous celebration. And if you think about it, that is a pretty good time to celebrate. Theresa first, she will be 10 this year!, then Ingrid (5), Christmas, New Years, Zoboe (8) then Valentines day. It is amazing how fast time moves by. Sarah has to be smiling from heaven. Ingrid tells me that Sarah comes to her at night and tucks her in. As I mentioned in an earlier post, I get the girls all day, Sarah gets to watch them all night. What a wonderful little family God has given me charge of.
Take care everyone. Peace to you and get outside some and enjoy the fresh crisp air.
Chris
Well, I thought it was time for an update. Sometimes the innocence and openness of children can really warm my heart. Last night Theresa was having difficulty falling to sleep. She called me into her room and asked me to give her something to think about. (I tell her a story on occasion to help her get distracted enough to fall asleep.) So I asked her to think about the most wonderful place in the world where she would like to be. Her immediate answer was, “you mean besides home?” That response, completely unsolicited and spontaneous was wonderful to hear. After I talked to her for a few moments, I left the room with a grin from ear to ear. What a great affirmation of my parenting.
Theresa will be ten in a couple of months. Some days it amazes me at how fast the time really moves along. I think Sarah would be very proud of her brood! They are growing quickly into beautiful, intelligent, loving young women. Each has their own distinct personality. The funny thing is that many aspects of Sarah’s personality and even mannerisms are spread out over the different girls. What a blessing it is to be so deeply connected to these children.
Just a short one tonight. Suffice it to say, all is well at the K house.
Peace, and thank you for your prayers.
Chris
The time felt right for an update. Last weekend, I had my 25th high school class reunion. Sarah had been a member of our class for all but the final two years of high school. Consequently, most everyone considered her a class mate. While I had a great time sharing histories with everyone, it was particularly painful telling people who were expecting to see her why she was not there. Quite a few did not know she died of cancer. There was also a board of remembrance set up with photos of class mates who had died. Sarah’s was right at the top. The reunion also occurred just a couple of days after what would have been our 11th anniversary. So the whole episode was bittersweet for sure.
The girls just continue to grow and stretch their minds and bodies. Our home school group participated in an archeology dig with the professionals early last week. The students learned a great deal about the nuts and bolts of the science. Fun was had by all. The other night I opened up my observatory to the home school group. It was a lot of fun sharing the stars with everyone. Some of the questions I fielded about what we were looking at were pretty deep indeed!
Well, just a shortie. I am switching internet service providers at the end of Sept. My new e-mail address will be: christokk@usadatanet.net so if you have any messages to send my way, use the new name.
Peace everyone.
Chris
I spent some time earlier this week looking back at the updates written during the past couple of years and realized that I have 131 pages worth! For me that’s a lot! But then again, there has been much to talk about. Updating this web site has been very therapeutic for me and the girls. And in some ways it still is. However as in all things, change occurs. The girls are continuing to grow into beautiful, intelligent young women. And I am growing as well.
The bottom line is that updating the web site has gradually become more of a chore than a joy. Oh sure there are many things that would be fun to let everyone know about, but they are part of most people’s normal family life. And to that end, using Sarah’s web site has enabled me to chronicle my family’s journey to a “new normal”.
We have experienced an incredible shock to our family through Sarah’s death. And I am most thankful to Caringbridge for making this journaling experience available to us, so that we could share with the world our battle through sickness, tragedy and triumph over the nasty disease colon cancer. There is an incredible depth of feeling, insight and, if I may say, wisdom available through our story. And if I know the terms correctly, this web site will be available indefinitely for anyone to peruse.
I pray that If you happen to find yourself in a similar situation to ours, or know of someone in our situation, this web site will provide some inspiration during those long days of painful crying spells. As I have mentioned before, my Catholic faith has been the cornerstone of my life and our family’s healing. Actually receiving Christ into my body each week brings a sense of peace, understanding and healing that is indescribable. The body and blood of Christ also provides me the fuel to take on life’s challenges in the coming week. So in many ways, Sarah’s passing has opened the door for Christ to increase and deepened my faith and that of my family. Your prayers and support too have been instrumental!
Updates now will come much less regularly. It may be weeks or months between updates, but don’t fear. We are still here! Sarah’s spirit is as strong today as it was when she was still with us. The girls are living demonstrations of that each and every day! We are profoundly grateful to so many of you for what you have done for us in little things, and in great. This tragedy in our lives has brought out some incredible angels of kindness in the form of YOU!
Peace everyone,
If you have any comments, feel free to e-mail me at: christokk@aol.com
Chris K. and the girls
Life continues to grow and change in our family. What a wonderful gift it is to watch your children progress so beautifully through childhood. There is no doubt that parenting by its very nature is rewarding, challenging and a rich blessing.
It has been 2 1/2 years since Sarah went home. And over that intervening time, I have come to see the plan God has set out for our family a little clearer. Clearer in the since that I understand Sarah’s role and my role. I believe that the greatest gift she had to offer was to bring these 3 angels into the world and start them off in the best possible way. The older they get, the more humbling and profound that gift she gave is to me. Sarah used to tell me that what she wanted more than anything out of life was to be a mother. God prepared her in his own very special way for that task.
For my part, God has chosen me to lead these 3 angels. I too have been prepared by him in many ways over the years for this job. And it is one that I really enjoy. Perhaps sooner or later he will provide me with a new mate to help share this work and add her special gifts. God knows exactly what I need and when I need it. That’s the benefit of being omnipotent. I trust him. Trusting him relieves me of the worry and heartache of searching out a new spouse. Quite honestly, my priority is to direct my focus and energies toward raising these beautiful girls. The rewards from this are deeply satisfying in themselves.
So, thank you everyone for your prayers for our family. Rest assured, you are in our prayers also.
Peace,
Chris
I did a lot of cheering today. Cheering at the fact that the would be mass murdering terrorists were nabbed! YEAH!! My thoughts and feelings run very deep about all this terror war stuff, but suffice it to say that I am glad we are safe.
On with the growing girls. I have updated the pictures this evening. Theresa took a bunch of photos during the trip to Montana, so I am posting a few. This week has been a busy one too. On Tuesday, we went to Meijers to do some groceries shopping and the girls purchased their fish. Yes, they wanted to get a pet fish. So Theresa, Zoe and Ingy got themselves a pet 12 cent goldfish named “goldenrod”. The excitement was intense. When we got home, I helped the girls get the fish situated in his new fish bowl. An hour later Zoe began to cry because goldenrod wasn’t moving. The fish died. Perhaps a little too much excitement for goldie? Now they want another one and this time her name will be Margaret. Margaret means long life you know.... We shall see.
Additionally, the girls took some money out of their savings accounts to help purchase supplies for their new backyard playhouse. All three came up with the design and I am building it (with their limited help) behind the swing set. It is raised up off the ground a couple of feet and will have window openings, walls and a waterproof roof. They are very excited about it.... and I am very tired. :)
So, as you can see, much is happening around our place. I hope you like the pictures.
Peace,
Chris
We made it back to Louisville late yesterday afternoon after an uneventful 3 days on the road. it felt good to sleep in my own bed. We had a really nice time.
Taking the girls on such a big vacation was a new experience for me (and for them). I wasn’t exactly sure what was going to happen. Experience has taught me to be flexible about our activities. So we went to the Lewistown city pool on 4 different days. The girls loved the water, diving boards and especially the dual corkscrew water slides! I was having fun doing can openers off the high dive trying to get the lifeguard wet.
One of the days we went to the state fair at the local fair grounds. It was quite impressive and the types of rides covered the whole gamut. The girls each got 10 ticket coupons in which to use for the various rides. Some rides cost 3 coupons while others cost only 1. Theresa, to my surprise, rode the Tornado and the Octopus. Zoebo on the other hand, rode less scary rides. Ingy and I rode the merry-go-round. By the end of the day we were all exhausted but happy.
Nearly every evening, some deer would come up to the back porch of the B&B and drink from the bird bath and eat from the bird feeder. That was fun to watch. One late night when I was standing out on the deck, a large animal snorted and thrashed about in the aspens about 50 feet away. Needless to say it scared the **** out of me and I ran back inside. I was still curious about what it was so I watched and listened very carefully. It was a large elk with a rack! Ah yes, this is Montana! One must get used to sharing the outdoors with wildlife. A couple of nights earlier, I was “entertained” by the erie howls of two bands of coyotes while observing with my telescope.
The days were hot, the sky was clear, humidity was low and the nights were cool and very dark. The smell of the Ponderosa pine filled the air. The community of Lewistown was very friendly too. Ingy wanted to stay longer but alas, it was time to come home. So overall, we had a really nice time. I think that we will go back next year, perhaps a little later, August or Sept.
Thank you everyone for the prayers. You are in ours too.
Peace,
Chris
Yes we all made it to Montana in good shape. The B&B is really nice, so are the owners. The view from here is, well, Montana. Theresa is the staff photographer and she is busy clicking away. When we get home, I will download some of them to the website for all to see.
Sue and Ralph left this morning for Glacier National Park and then points beyond. Pray for their safe journey. The girls and us adults went swimming at the Lewistown city pool the other day and had a ball. They have a huge slide that was a big hit. Also diving boards and other things. The girls are really in their own element in the water.
I'll post more later.
Peace everyone!
Chris
And a fine evening it is! Although it is hot. I finished, delivered and installed the large booth and table project that had been occupying my time the past couple of months. It looks very nice indeed! (If I must say so myself). The client was quite happy and it was put it to good use the first day. In the middle of August, the Louisville Home Remodeling Show will feature this client’s newly remodeled home. These shows are quite popular with the well-to-do and upscale remodelers. The expected crowd for the weekend is estimated to be around 1000 folks!
The client is so pleased with the booth and table I made for them, that they want me to hang around during the show; hand out business cards, and talk to the large pool of potential clients. So, I could become very busy again. But first, a good long vacation to the Montana mountains and a some down time here at home!
The girls are all excited about our upcoming trip. Theresa wants to collect lots of rocks for her Geology Exhibit. I told her that that would be fine.... as long as SHE held them! :) I think that we will have a good time. The drive is long, but we travel well together. Sue and Ralph will be going along with us and will take Zoebo for part. They are excited too. Praying for all of us would be greatly appreciated! Ralph and Sue will continue on west from Lewistown, MT and hit many other sights. So my next update will probably be either from the road or our final destination.
Take care everyone,
Peace
Chris
Well, we all had a really good time this past weekend. The girls enjoyed their aunt’s house and I had a lot of fun with the golf tournament. My team even tied for first place. One of the gifts I handed out to all the players was an embroidered golf hat. They all seemed to enjoy that as well as the whole day. The weather cooperated all weekend long too! Hopefully next year we can add in a few more family members and friends that weren’t able to make it this year.
It felt really good to see the family, have some fun and enjoy each other’s company.
Thanks everyone. Peace
Chris
The weather is rather nasty around here this evening, however Theresa Zoe and I went to a 4th party on the 3rd last evening. Ingrid stayed with grandma and grampa pal all night. A good friend of ours had a catered party at their golf course home and we got to see a wonderful fireworks display at the club house. That also gave me a chance to talk to some old friends outside of the church setting. The weather cooperated, the food was good and the hospitality was first rate. The party also wiped out the girls :)
Speaking of girls, The are at it again. Theresa came down to my shop and informed me that she wanted to use Sarah’s old sewing machine. I asked her if she knew how to use it. She said no but that didn’t stop her. With just a little guidance in following the instructions she picked it up quickly and was busy sewing doll clothes. She also made a pillow for Zoe. I have the feeling that soon, she will be making clothes for herself. That is if she has the available time. You see, she is also actively learning about geology.
Earlier in the week, we purchased a small drawered case and a tack hammer for her to use. She has filled every drawer with several varieties of rocks. All are labled with their scientific name, location were found, date and of course her name.
Zoebo has spent several days reading books to Ingrid so that Ingrid can get a special book bag from the library. Each summer the library system around here puts on a read your summer away program where each student can earn gifts if they read 10 books by July 29th. Well, both girls read all 10 books within a day or two of the start of the program. Ingy was feeling left out. So the head librarian said that it would be fine if Zoe read 10 books to her.
All the girls are enjoying grandma and grampa’s pool this year too. Each one feels confident in themselves no matter how deep the water is. Especially Zoe. She is a natural cork. Miss T. can travel nearly 50 feet underwater now. Ingrid is very confident too. All she uses is a noodle or a floatey ring. It is a real joy to watch them!
Speaking of joy, this weekend is the 20th Krauskopf open golf tournament. It has always been fun for me and I am looking forward to it. We have around 20 family members and friends who will pare off in teams of 4. This year I have been the one to set everything up and I have a few really nice surprises for all :)
Finally, the trip to MONTANA is fast approaching. The girls have been “practice camping” downstairs by sleeping in their sleeping bags. Sue and Ralph are going to join us for the trip out. Then after a few days at the B & B with us, they will explore Glacier National Park etc. I decided to take 3 relatively easy driving days to get there, rather than 2 hard ones. Sometimes I forget that I don’t have to rush so much! We are all looking forward it. I have designated Theresa as the official photographer. Hopefully, when we get some decent pictures I will post them here!
Peace everyone.
Be safe this holiday.
Chris
Sometimes it is incredible how fast time moves when you are busy. I just looked at the last update and realized it had been 9 days since then! Perhaps that is the nature of summer! it goes by fast.
Yesterday the girls and I spent a wonderful afternoon in Kokomo, In. with the Weisner side of the family. It gave all of us a great opportunity to get together, talk about life and eat some really good food. Thank you so much everyone. I felt Sarah’s presence everywhere, she was laughing and having a good time. Needless to say the girls had a ball! I am honored to be a member of this group! When we got home, the girls were dead tired and slept like logs. Daddy too!
Earlier in the week, the girls and I had a discussion on “pushing buttons”. Everyone has them, you know, those sensitive areas that can be aggravated by comments or actions. Lately, Zoe and Theresa have been pushing each others quite a bit. Ingrid has been in the middle of this too. The net result was whining, tears and anger. So at breakfast I explained what those buttons were and how rude, hurtful and disrespectful it was to push them. Then I asked each girl to tell me what their hot buttons were. Next, I laid out a clear line of disciplinary action if they pressed each other’s buttons. Hopefully, this will nip this developing problem in the bud.
Ah yes, growing girls. Life continues to march boldly forward.
Thanks everyone for your love and prayers.
Chris
Thank you Dad! Your insight and wisdom has been very valuable to me over the years. Thank you too ALL you dads in my life.
My day started off, well, abruptly. The girls charged into my room promptly at 6:15 am and said HAPPY FATHER’S DAY DAD!! Theresa was holding a breakfast tray with some eggs and cereal and yogurt. So this morning I got to eat before I was awake! What a wonderful gesture. They all sat on me and around me and felt so proud of their accomplishment. Now I know how mom and dad felt when we used to do the same thing to them.
The girls continue to grow and stretch their minds. Theresa’s latest interest is geology. I checked out a field guide on rocks and minerals the other day from the library. Miss T. spent the next 3 full days reading it intently, digging up rocks from around the yard and identifying them. We took a hike Saturday and she insisted on filling my pockets with various rocks so that she could I.D. them and write a description about them when we got home. My budding scientist! Zoe and Ingrid are busy figuring out where they fit in to the world too.
Well, just a shortie tonight. Thank you so much everyone.
Peace,
Chris
Life continues to unfold around here. The girls started the swimming season at Grandma and Grampa’s pool several days ago. All three are like fish. Especially Zoe. She has no qualms about playing in the deep end for a long time. It probably helps that her body type enhances her ability to float easily. Theresa is beginning to learn the fine art of diving. Before long, she will be entering the water quite gracefully. Ingrid is gaining confidence too. She will put her face in the water and blow bubbles. It is quite a joy to see them develop.
Each year they stretch their abilities to new levels.
I am doing just that too. Being a widowed dad of 3 has certainly opened my eyes to many things. Probably the most important thing is my reliance on Christ and the Eucharist to keep me on an even keel. I have discovered that it takes very few extra “things” for me to reach my limit. I remember asking God over the years to use me fully, THAT HE HAS! But in a real sense, knowing one’s limits is a very good thing. It saves an awful lot of work, worry, and heartache.
It occurred to me a few weeks ago that I have been going nonstop at building projects for folks since before Sarah died. Over two years worth of continuous work and backlog. I have decided to take a long well deserved break from client projects. A sabbatical if you will. This will free up some more mental and physical energy for myself, the family and things around the home. I want to play for a while. But for now, I have the rest of a large project to finish. The 20th Krauskopf Open golf tournament is about 3 and a half weeks away and I am hoping to finish up the project by then.
Well folks, I want to thank all of you for continuing to read my rather feeble updates on our family. Thank you so much for your prayers and help. Thank you Sue and Ralph and happy 49th anniversary!
Peace,
Chris
A special treat tonight, Theresa wants to give an update so here she is!
Hi everyone, it’s Theresa. Today we had a fun day of badminton and throwing around the frisbee. Every once in a while dad had to throw a different frisbee to Ingrid to keep her busy. We have recently gone to Aunt Joaine’s house. We were going to see a reenactment of the battle for Vincinnes, but it was toooo stinking hot!!!
We learned a bit about how they create Harry potter scenes. We also got interviews. I liked Harry (Daniel Radcliffe) best of all of them. He said he developed two personalities, his and Harry’s.
Soon I am going to Cincinnati with Cassandra for the day. And last week we went to the Desserts, Desserts festival at the Cathedral and ate tons of sweets! But no Boston Creme Pie:( This summer, we are going on a trip to Montana! I am excited about going to the central Montana state fair. It will be going on during our stay.
Soon dad is going to finish the project for our friends he has been working on.
Bye, I am finished for now.
So, there you have it. Miss T’s update. She forgot to mention earlier in the week we all went outside and played in the pouring rain.
Well everyone, take care of yourselves. And thank you for your prayers for us.
Peace,
Chris
A special thank you to all you vets out there. Your service and sacrifice to our country has allowed us to live lives of freedom that far too many fellow countrymen don’t really appreciate or even understand. My whole family is deeply appreciative. I am very proud to be the son of a veteran! Thank you Dad! I have learned over the past many years living here in Kentucky that this state’s military men and women have played pivotal roles throughout the nation’s history. Folks around here are very proud to step up and serve when needed. The Daniel Boone spirit is alive and well!
Well, it is a rare girl-free weekend around here. The girls are at their aunt’s house having a great time. Although, Ingy called and wanted to talk because she missed me. I have taken extra care to enjoy this time, slow down and not jump in and work on those 1001 projects that always seem to be waiting for me. I find that it is very easy to do too much. Especially when there are 3 fewer distractions with which to contend. But sometimes I have to remind my self of that old saying about how no one wishes they had worked more hours at the office when on their death bed.
Yes, the girls are growing up fast. I often catch myself staring out the basement workshop window watching and grinning at their interactions in the back yard. Zoe is such a bubbly, energetic and coordinated fireplug. She has emotions to match too! Then there is Theresa the commander. She has such drive, determination and intelligence. There is no doubt that she is the first born! And then there is Ingy. Ingrid has a very rich imagination. She also has some of the commander drive too. What a wonderful mix Sarah has left here for us to discover, guide and cherish. So many times one or more of the girls will act or say something that reminds me of Sarah. She certainly does live on through them.
Peace everyone, drive safely.
Chris
I hope spring has fully arrived where you are. It had been a dreary week around here. But the last few days have been very nice. Our homeschool group had our final meeting of the “official” school year on Friday. We met at the Falls of the Ohio Interpretive Center. What a great place. The kids had a great time and so did the adults. We had lunch right on the 230 million year old fossil beds, and ice cream at the ice cream parlor. I use the word “official” because that is when schools in KY start winding up their school year (and my record keeping requirements). Of course for the girls, there is no end. Just as there was no beginning. They just keep on learning, growing and stretching their minds’. It is an absolute delight to be a part of this journey with them.
In other news, I secured a bed and breakfast for late July in the Montana mountains. The girls and I are taking a well deserved vacation. Plus I get to see a part of the country that I fell in love with over 20 years ago during my bicycle tours. The owners also said that the Central Montana State Fair is going on during our stay and the kids would love it. On the way back, we will take a few more days and explore more of the route Lewis and Clark used to find the northwest passage. My aunt Annie use to call me Christopher Columbus because I liked to roam around and explore. Well Annie, I still am! And now the girls are following my footsteps too!:)
Thank you once again everyone for reading this web site and following the progression of our little post Sarah family. At last count, I have written about 125 pages worth of updates! Goodness!
Peace everyone
Chris
I have been thinking a lot about the mother’s in my life and have come to realize that I (the girls too) have been incredibly blessed with outstanding mother figures!
My mother Joan bore 10 children and to this day treats each one of us with an unconditional love that is truly inspiring. It literally has no bounds. For example, during the past couple of weeks, my mother (dad too) went to help my brother’s family during a very trying time. My brother’s wife had a severe ankle injury caused by an accident. He has 4 children and a wife who was in the hospital for many days. My mother stepped in immediately and did her best to help with the children. There was no hesitation to go despite the fact that she has an extremely uncomfortable chronic back problem and arthritis.
There are literally hundreds and hundreds of times when my mother gave of herself in difficult and even life ending times just out of pure love. She was next to Sarah throughout the last night of her life offering comfort and silent prayers. The lessons I have learned about love put into action from my mother are incredible gems that I am trying my best to instill into Theresa, Zoe and Ingrid. Thank you mom, we love you very much!
Another mother that has had a profound influence on me and the girls is Sue, Sarah’s mom. Sue has a way of communicating that is so clear and direct that it is like a breath of fresh air in a stale room. Oftentimes when I have been struggling with thoughts or feelings that I can’t seem to get a handle on, she takes one look at me and says in two words what I had been working on for two weeks! What a gift that is. And her love for the children is so evident. Yes, Sue you have been a wonderful influence and help in so many ways for us. We love you very much too.
There are so many other mothers out there who out of the goodness of their hearts just want to help my family. If I start naming names, I would be up all night! Suffice it to say, you know who you are and how grateful we are to you.
Last, but certainly not least, is the mother of our children, Sarah. Over the past few weeks, I have been reading an old journal I wrote in for a period of a few years. It covered the time when Sarah and I were courting and early marriage. It struck me as to how much growth and change we both went through. One thing that was consistent was Sarah’s desire to be a stay at home mom. She told me many times that all she wanted to do was be a mommy. In case you may have forgotten, Sarah was a brilliant person. As an RN her intellect and understanding of patients was frequently well beyond the doctors she worked with, and her bedside manner was among the very best anywhere. The work world was hers to own. It was only after we started to have children that I realized how incredibly gifted she was at pouring love into the girls.
She used all of her intellect, heart, soul and patience to start these girls out in the best possible way. In reality, that is the most important and valuable job! Sarah was also supremely comfortable and confident in my parenting abilities too. That allowed her the gift of time with them and freedom from worry. Even during all the cancer stuff, I had to frequently remind her to focus on the healing of her own body and leave the care of the girls to me. Probably one of the most wonderful things Sarah ever did was to invite the girls completely into the cancer journey . Nothing was hidden from them. They knew everything that was going on and we talked about it frequently. And in her final act. She showed the girls and me how to face death.
Thank you Sarah. And thank you mothers. Enjoy this special day.
Peace,
Chris
6 years ago this afternoon, Sarah and I had our sacramental marriage in the church. It was during the noon Mass at the Cathedral of the Assumption. We were legally married several years earlier, but having our marriage blessed by the church was very important to us. And as the years go by, the importance of that act grows in my heart.
It was a great day indeed. Sarah always loved to say that we had over 800 people and the full 60 member choir attend our wedding. We both felt deep within our hearts that our marriage was now right with God and right with us. The reception was in the basement of the Cathedral and I remember we were very happy serving everyone finger foods and cake. Theresa was a few years old and Zoe was a rambunctious toddler.
This Sunday’s readings dealt with Christ as the good shepherd. And how he gave us a wonderful model to emulate. Hearing how Christ did it helped affirm me and my role as shepherd to Theresa, Zoe and Ingrid. The task is not an easy one for us parents. There always seems to be someone or something trying to divert our attention from the act of shepherding. But If I can keep focused on his example, the rewards are priceless.
I managed to find a photo of Sarah and me on our sacramental wedding day and I have included it in the photo album.
Peace everyone, have a great week.
Chris
Derby town is winding up for the Kentucky Derby this Saturday. Earlier in the week we were greeted to a wide variety of hot air balloons floating over head. (part of the Derby Festival) Everything from the Early Times bottle to the Energizer Bunny! The girls and I sat on the front steps and watched and cheered for our favorite ones. One balloon was ready to set down right in the middle of the street but decided to land in the field a few hundred yards away. It was kind of fun.
Before I forget, new photos are on-line. I uploaded some new one’s of the girls. You can see for yourself just how fast they are growing. Ingrid continues to use large words appropriately and her imaginative games are quite entertaining. She loves to create her own adventures of “Shark boy and Lava girl”. I get to be shark boy. My only role is to tell her how great she is (lava girl).
I had an interesting Sarah moment the other evening. Just before my bedtime I go to each of the girl’s beds and pray over them a simple prayer. The day this occurred had been rather exhausting for me physically. Read a LOT of work. Anyway, when I was praying over Theresa, Sarah “said” to my mind’s eye, “you get them during the day, I get them during the night, go to sleep”. It was amazing. I felt a really nice comfort and peace after that.
Well folks, it’s a rather short update tonight because I stayed up way too late using my telescope. I had a great time, but the morning comes by awfully fast!
Peace everyone.
Chris
One of the great benefits of home schooling is learning directly from the world around us instead of just from a book. As spring has sprung, The girls and I have been doing a lot of exploring. In early March, I set up a “creek watch” program with the girls. We visit our neighborhood creek once every week or so to discover what has changed since the last visit. The girls don’t even have a clue as to how much biology they are learning only that it is “a blast” (Zoe’s words). We have catalogued, beaver, muskrat, craw dads, clams, fresh water shrimp, minnows, ducks, herons, cranes and a bunch of other animals there. During this past trip the aquatic and shore plants have really taken off. Zoe decided to take a clear peanut butter jar and a small fish net to bring home some critters. The jar is now proudly displayed in the middle of the dining room table with algae and a complete universe of small “critters”. Yes, it has a sealed lid! Each day they look at what is there and see who eats who. I direct them to on-line resources for answers to their endless questions!
Theresa insists that she is going to take a drop of the water and look at it through her microscope. Even Ingrid is getting into the act. They are all 3 like learning tornados!
Miss T’s terrarium is growing as well. She specifically chose plants that grew short and fast so as to keep her interest. Next week, I think I will get some water quality testing supplies so we can find out if the creek is healthy or not.
Miss T. is growing again. I got her a pediatrician recommended book from the American Girl series called “The Care and Upkeep of You”. She loves it. It basically talks about biological changes, hygiene and the like for girls starting to go through puberty. Now she wants to take a shower every morning and a bath every evening. I’ll have to work on that! But there is no doubt. These wonderful daughters are growing up fast. It is a real honor and blessing to an integral part of it all.
Take care everyone. Peace to you and thank you for your prayers and thoughts. I think Sarah would be proud!
Chris
Time has a way of just really flying by if one is busy. Such has been the case with the K household this week. The Easter weekend was very nice. I served at the Easter Vigil Mass (Saturday evening). Archbishop Kelly presided. I always enjoy serving with him. You would never know he has such a position of authority within the church if you met him on the street. His genuine humility and honesty is a blessing to all of us. Next year will be his last Easter Vigil Mass because of mandatory retirement (75y.o.). After that, The Pope will appoint a new Archbishop and the great wheel of the church will continue to roll.
The girls also had a ball at their Aunt’s house. When I arrived on Sunday afternoon, they were all dressed in their nicest church clothes and we took pictures. I will post them to the web site later. Without a doubt, they OD’d on sweets! They slept like rocks when we got home too! We all had a very good time.
The garden is taking shape. The girls and I went to Lowes and picked up some flowers and vegetable plants. Each girl selected one or two small flats of flowers to plant in their special section of the garden. They also planted some flower seeds. Theresa and Zoe took the empty flats and created an “inside window sill garden experiment”. They want to see how many days to germination and how many more days till flowers appear. Theresa has created a chart to help her track progress.
These girls minds are just constantly growing and stretching. Ingrid cornered me in the kitchen the other day and told me that she was an “aquatic vampire bat”. I asked her what does an aquatic vampire bat do and she said “I dive into the water and bite fish.” Makes perfect sense if you think about it. Where she comes up with these sort of things I will never know. But I love it. Zoe and Theresa camped out in our big tent last night. At around 10 pm they both came in and asked me when I was going to set up the telescope for observing. We looked at stuff for a few minutes, and then they went into the tent and collapsed, sound asleep.
Well, to round things out, the air conditioner needed a new capacitor not a new pump! That is $ 200 instead of 3 grand! I was happy. The new shades are on their way and all that is left is to figure out the mower misfire mystery..... Stay tuned..
Peace all.
Chris
I trust that each and everyone of you will be able to fully enjoy this Easter weekend. I took the girls up to their aunt’s house this afternoon for the weekend. That means that it is the first time I have been “girl free” for Easter since 94! I will join the girls on Easter Sunday for brunch and then take them home.
An interesting thing has been going on with me today. For lack of a better explanation, I think that Satan has been trying to trip me up. First, early this morning, I discovered that the house air conditioner condenser unit had seized up. (This means BAD news!) I called the A/C people and they told me how much it will cost to get a new one. Needless to say I was not happy.
Second, my super-duper, spiffy, ultra reliable Honda push mower decided to act up on me. After a complete carburetor rebuild and a new electrical coil, it did the same thing as before. The mower shop guys were baffled. Of course they were willing to troubleshoot the problem for me at half the cost of the mower + parts+ two week turnaround. Aggravation was getting pretty strong.
Third, This afternoon, I finally received from Lowes the new special order shades for the living room. I read the stickers on each of the 3 shades and they all said the right dimensions. So I proceeded to tear down the old ones. When I installed the new shades, they were way too narrow. Of course I had torn up the old ones. Now I have nothing over the windows! Lowes will make up for it... in about two weeks!
During the course of the day, I had been listening to Catholic radio and they were talking about temptation and how Jesus must have been incredibly tempted to do something to avoid the murderous pain he was going through on the cross. It dawned on me this evening that Satan knows just how to push our buttons. And today was my day! Good Friday, the hottest day of the year too! Hmmmmm......
I prayed a Rosary and felt much better. We must always be on guard.
Peace everyone,
May you have a blessed Easter.
Chris
I had planned on updating last night, but mother nature had different plans. We had a tornado warning so I got the kids into the basement. The storm passed right over us but the funnel stayed aloft. Welcome to spring in the Ohio Valley! Thank you God for watching over us.
This past week has been a good relaxing, decompression kind of week. I have a major job set to begin during this upcoming week so I decided to not plan anything else. About 3 or 4 days ago, I realized that there had been some project or necessary activity “weighing” on my mind virtually every week since before Sarah died! The opportunity to just be and enjoy the girls has been very refreshing indeed.
Late last week, I invited Grandma and Grampa Hughes over for dinner and we all had a good time. Nostalgia for Sarah crept into our thoughts and comments. When they left for home later that evening, Sue turned to me and said, “We’ve made pretty good progress since she left us.” That simple complement really struck me. We really have made a lot of progress. Everyone goes through grief and healing in their own way, and at their own speed. What was once “normal”, is no longer. And in it’s place, a new normal takes over. The new normal has various aspects of the old one, but also many new pieces. Then, after a period of time, one begins to feel comfortable with the new normal. As time continues, and you have an open heart, you can begin to see the tremendous wisdom of God at work.
No, I didn’t want Sarah to die such a painful and horrible death. But in her death, through her death, she taught us (me) not to fear death. Whether we want to believe it or not, death will visit us sooner or later. And we should embrace it as a natural part of our life cycle not fear it. After all, it is the end of one form of being and the beginning of an eternal one.
Sarah’s role was to start off these wonderful daughters in the best environment possible, and my role is to raise them into the incredible young women she wanted them to be. In each case, God has used and is using our gifts to their fullest. How much more alive can you get!
Peace everyone,
Chris
Theresa reminded me that she will be very tired on Saturday. I asked her why and she said that she will have completed a 31 day march! Ha Ha! I remember that one... It’s as lame now as it was when I was a kid. Oh well, she liked it.
This has been a really good week. Actually, nearly all weeks seem to be pretty good around here. The difference is that spring can finally be felt in the air. That allows us to get outside to do some exploring. (Side note: My aunt used to call me Christopher Columbus because, as a kid, I liked to wander around exploring... I still do!).
Spring around the Ohio valley seems to be a mecca for birds. Many different kinds. Every other morning I put some bird seed on the deck just outside the sliding glass door. We open the curtains and watch to see who joins us for breakfast. Since 2 years ago, we have seen 26 different species of birds. We have a bird field guide to help us identify which is which. Even Ingrid is becoming a skilled birder.
On a similar note, Yesterday afternoon we were in the back yard and discovered a opossum lounging in one of our trees. He just starred at us totally unimpressed. They are nocturnal so it surprised us to see it in the day. It took him about half an hour to come down and lumber along. We talked a lot about him because the girls were loaded with questions.
Last night, we had some home school family friends over to look through my telescopes. The wife is a professional archeologist and he is a pilot. The have two rambunctious boys. It worked out pretty well. We (adults) enjoyed some very nice views of Saturn and the eskimo nebula, while the kids went berserk playing in the yard. Needless to say, all had a good nights sleep.
Zoebo has started piano lessons again. She feels ready to go and will share the lesson time with Theresa. Thank you very much Denine!
Well, I could go on, but suffice it to say, we are happy and full of energy.... at least most of us are full of energy:) Thank you for your prayers and love. Thank you too Sarah my dear. Your presence is never far away. Whenever I think of you, I always see you smiling.
Peace.
Chris
I hope everyone is doing well. The girls and I got back from Gulf Shores and expected to be greeted by spring....NOT!!! Mother nature just doesn’t want to cooperate this year. It is pretty uncommon in Louisville to have no leaves on the trees in late March. But that is what we have. I believe patience is in order.
I put some new photos in the album if you care to check them out. I think that Sarah would approve of just how her beautiful daughters are growing. They are truly a blessing to this world.
This is a short post tonight. I am tired and will fill you in on the exciting events and discoveries around the K household when my body is more awake... I believe patience is in order :)
Peace everyone.
Chris
I hope your St. Patrick’s day has gone well. Earlier in the day we had our monthly home school meeting. It was a bunch of fun. One of the parents took up Irish line dancing several months ago and proceeded to give us a performance. It was quite impressive! The kids and other adults present were given lessons. Theresa was really enthralled with it. Zoe and Ingrid stayed with the younger kids and played off to the side. Kathy and Jim brought some authentic Irish dishes. And a good time was had by all.
We have had a little sickness pass through the family lately. It started with Ingrid during the last day or so of vacation. It got everyone but Zoe. Ingrid got some hits of Dr. prescribed Zithromax and she is well on the mend. I just felt like crap for a day or two.
Tonight was movie night. Our first choice was to be Raiders of the Lost Ark with Harrison Ford. However, Blockbuster didn’t even carry that movie anymore! They don’t carry any of the Raiders series of movies. This was not the first time that I could not find very popular movies there. I have a hunch that they are getting ready to fold. Anyway, the movie we chose was: Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone. Theresa had read all the “Harry” books but had not ever seen a movie. It was entertaining and the girls had a good time with it.
This afternoon we also had photo’s taken for the parish directory. It was the first time the directory had been updated in a while. The last photo we had taken for it, Sarah was pregnant with Ingrid. When we were finished, Ingrid told me that mommy was next to her holding her hand..... Another thing that I noticed was the look we all had on our faces when the proofs came up digitally a few moments after the shoot. We looked (and felt) very happy. That was compared with the earlier shoot 4+ years ago, and we all had the same joyful look on our faces. The joy and love we had when Sarah was around, is still around today. From the photo’s comparison, no one would ever know what went on during that span of time. Except, of course, that Sarah was not there... or was she?.... :)
Peace everyone. Spring is fast approaching, enjoy the outdoors if you can this weekend.
Chris
The vacation is going well. I'm sorry to report that it is only 82 degrees and sunny. The beach is awful. It has so much white, warm, pristine sand that the girls are having a difficult time finding the best location to place our towels when we soak up the nasty sun or play in the large waves.
Golfing is pretty bad too. I only shot the best game of the year on an Arnie Palmer designed course. That ugly hole on the green almost swallowed up my golf ball on the third shot of a par 5......
Yeah.... We're having a great time. The trip down was pretty uneventful, other than the very strong wind. As we passed through Birmingham around 8 am, I noticed a 5 1/2 mile traffic jam coming up from the south. So that has changed plans for when we will leave Gulf Shores on our return trip. We will leave around 6:30 am local time tomorrow and avoid rush hour. That will put us home around 7:30 pm Lou. time.
The girls are loving the water. The big waves are a big hit. I even did a little body surfing! Ingrid and Zoe collected many, many shells to bring home.
This has been a very good segway into spring for us. Today, everyone is vegging out. That gave me enough time to come her to the local library and update.
Peace everyone. (Mom and Dad are doing fine. I will help them pack for their departure on Wednesday.)
Chris
It is nice to get a free Sunday afternoon. The girls are with Joan Huber and the fabulous Cassandra today. They are off to see a matinee, Curious George I believe. Needless to say, they are all very excited. I’m sure that I will hear about it, ALL AT ONCE when they get home. Thank you Joan for the offer.
Earlier in the week, my astronomy club president called and asked if he could bring a reporter from the Courier Journal (our local newspaper) to my place. Apparently the CJ is running an article on back yard observatories, and mine is the only one in the immediate area. When they arrived it was dark and clear, so I opened up the observatory and put the telescope through its paces. We had a good time and I was able to show Ken (our club president) and Matt (the reporter) a bunch of data I have obtained concerning my current observing program. Ken was “duly impressed” and asked if I would put on a program for the whole astro club in June. I said sure. My whole point in gathering so much information on a particular group of stellar objects was to share it with the club. Besides, it should be a whole lot of fun too! Early next week, the photographer is supposed to arrive during the day and take a few more pictures of my set up.
Vacation time is fast approaching! We are going to Gulf Shores, AL this coming weekend to spend a few days on the beach with my folks. The girls are ready and so am I. Zoebo has been counting down the days since about 40 days ago. Theresa just says, “oh I can’t wait till...” My plan is to leave very early Friday morning and arrive around 1pm local time. With luck, the girls will sleep for several hours in the car. So the next update I write will probably be when we are there!
Peace everyone, you are in our hearts. Sarah watch over us.
Chris
It has certainly been an active week around here. Earlier in the week, Zoe, Theresa, Ingrid and I were having dinner when Zoe spoke up and said she feels like “a great big fish in a little pond”. Theresa chimed in and said with enthusiasm, “I feel like a whale in a puddle with minnows all around.” Their comments confused me so I asked them what they meant. The both were expressing their feelings about school. (Initially I thought they were talking about something to do with dinner!) They are way ahead of their peers in so many areas. Simply put they are not being fed at the rate they were used to for years during home schooling. After much prayer and decernment, I decided in December to take them out of the Latin School after spring break and continue their home schooling. The girls are quite happy about it, I’m happy about it too.
On Thursday this week I volunteered as a guinea pig for some new electrical nerve conduction equipment at my endocrinologist’s office. Basically, various electrodes test how well the nerves are functioning in people with diabetes. The rationale being that people with diabetes can have a tendency to lose nerve function in the extremities. It was a shocking experience to say the least. Remember when you accidentally shocked yourself on an electrical cord, or an old outlet? Well, it felt like that for 20 pulses in 3 different locations! My nerves are in great shape because I felt every painful pulse! Perhaps I will think twice before cavalierly volunteering again. I keep reminding myself that it was done for the betterment of the science of diabetes treatment.
Also on Thursday, I took Theresa to the optometrists office for a vision test. She had been talking lately about having difficulty seeing some things on the chalk board. As suspected, her eyes needed more correction than her current eyeglass prescription. Several hours later when she tried on the new ones she was quite pleased. It seems that Miss T. has inherited Sarah’s vision. It will be interesting to see how the other girls vision changes over time.
And finally, today was Theresa’s first reconciliation. For those of you who don’t know what that is, first reconciliation is one of the 7 Catholic church sacraments. It is basically the confession of sin(s) to an ordained priest. It’s roots go directly to Christ when he told St. Peter that what ever you hold bound on earth is bound in heaven, and what ever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven. It is a fascinating sacrament with a very long and interesting history. It is also one that can be utilized often because we sin often. It is a tremendous gift from Christ that I seem to appreciate more the older I get.
Well folks, just remember, we love you very much and appreciate your prayers.
Peace
Chris
AHHHHHH!.... A free weekend. The girls are at their aunt’s house while I get a chance to recharge. It is one of those win-win-win situations. The girls are thrilled, my sister loves to have them, and I get time for quiet. So overall it is a good thing!
Peace everyone, I ‘ll write some more soon.
Chris
Valentines day is just around the corner. Zoebo is very excited about it. Since it is so close to her birthday, she has unofficially adopted it as her own. The day fits her so well anyway. She loves to bounce around and hug people. Sarah’s favorite name for her was “Zoey-woewy-oh”.
I had my annual diabetes related dilated eye exam the other day. It is amazing to me how many tests they can run to determine eye health. The good news is that my eyes work. The really good news is that, according to the doctor, I have quite exceptional eyes. He said that maybe one other person in 100 could see as well as I could. That was great to hear! I’ve had these eyes since day one, so I have no real basis for comparison. I just know how blessed I am.
This Sunday was anointing-of-the sick Sunday at the Cathedral. For those of you who are unfamiliar with this sacrament, it is when very sick or chronically ill people are anointed with a special chrism oil while Father lays hands on them and says prayers of healing. It comes directly out of the scriptures where Jesus heals a leper. Theresa said that I should get the blessing for my diabetes, so I did. When I came back to my chair (no! There was no miraculous cure that I was aware of!) I did began thinking of how this disease came about. In a flash, I said to myself, my pancreas islet cells died when Sarah died. It was the day of her death that I began to have the symptoms of diabetes. HUH... So, when she died, a piece of me died also! Literally! I wonder if Sarah was trying to leave me with “a little something” to remember her by! Silly girl!
Well once again, the good news is that I have this disease under good control. And like everything in life, when you begin to get a little older, the machinery that was once purring like a kitten begins to need a little maintenance.
Thank you everyone for your prayers and gracious support. What a blessing you have been and continue to be for us.
Peace
Chris
Well the great birthday celebration for Zoebo went along very well. Aside from her getting up at 5 am on the 3rd! So much unbridled enthusiasm. I was a mean daddy and told her that she had to wait until at least 7 am to open the presents! It was a fun day. The big kicker happened when we went to Grandma and Grampa Pal’s house for dinner. There was this large red shower curtain covering a big item by the living room chair. None of the girls were able to guess what it was. But when the time came, Zoe pulled off the curtain and Vola’ a brand new bicycle! It was a snazzy 20” wheel job with pretty colors, a handle bar bag and coaster brakes! Needless to say, Zoebo was very excited. Unfortunately, the weather has been rather poor around here until today. Now she is as happy as toast! Thank you grandparents for the wonderful gift. Miss Z. is ready to take on the world!
Also, as I mentioned in the last post, here is an excerpt from one of Sarah’s journals concerning the approaching arrival of baby number 2.
“Dear baby inside:
Everything this time is both different and yet familiar. I’m still nursing your sister so I think that's at least a part of why I felt so sick early on. Last time I could lie down if I felt bad. This time Miss Theresa keeps me busy.
Lost of people assume we want you to be a boy since our first was a girl. You know, I don’t really care which you are, just like I felt with your sister. I was & am just so thrilled at being pregnant, that a baby is a gift- not a particular “flavor” of baby.
I got a very brief chance to see you when you were 12 weeks inside of me. you were moving your arms & legs & your heart was beating away! Br. Brown did a very quick informal ultrasound. I don’t think I’ll take any more peeks inside unless there’s a real medical reason. There’s nothing they could find that would keep your daddy or me from wanting you.
Right now you are about 17 weeks along. Everything is formed. You are about the size of my hand. I have delivered babies your size. I think I have felt you kick one or two times but that’s all. you seem to be wiggling or squirming around some. Theresa talks to you & kisses my belly button a lot. I want so much for you two to be special friends. She is a very smart little girl & so loving. We can’t wait to see you in January.
We love you xoxo.”
Yes, we are truly fortunate my dear. Zoebo is a wonderful gift!
Peace everyone this evening.
Chris
The other day all three girls were playing some intricate game outside when Ingy came in to use the bathroom. When she came out, she asked if she could give me a kiss. I said sure, so she gave me a kiss on the cheek. The kiss was very nice, however, her breath reeked of onions! Not your grocery sweet variety, these onions were very pungent and strong! I asked her how on earth did you get onion breath? She sweetly said “Theresa fed them to me, I’m a horse”. Theresa apparently gathered the wild onions from the yard and fed them to Ingrid. Oh well, it could have been worms.
Well the final birthday of the season is rapidly approaching. Zoebo will turn 7 on Feb. 3rd. What a special kid she is. She has my mother’s empathy, Sarah’s emotions and my coordination and athleticism. The name Zoe is Greek for life, or full of life. And that she certainly has. Her bubblyness is always on display. Grandma and Grampa Pal have a special surprise for her I’m sure she will certainly love. Sarah wrote a nice note to Zoe when she was still in the womb. I will write down what she said on the next update.
Theresa continues to plow through books. Her fascination with Egyptology is turning into expertise about the subject. At last count, she had read 20 to 25 books on all aspects of the topic. She will frequently explain various aspects of the culture to me that are new to my understanding. Interestingly, she has begun to find inconsistencies in the literature. Occasionally, statements made by one author don’t jive with another. At that point, I ask her who is right? She says well these 3 or 4 or 5 other books say this, while only this author says that. I then help her to ascertain the most credible author. Usually, the simpler “kid books” on the subject are the ones with the most errors. That doesn’t surprise me.
Thank you all for your love and prayers. I will let you know how Zoebo’s birthday party goes in the next update.
Peace
Chris
Well, we made it through the second anniversary of Sarah’s departure in good shape. To the girls, this was just another day, and mommy’s passing appears to have had a minimal impact on their psyche. I guess that means that I have been raising them well enough.
When anniversaries come, it seems natural to go over the event in one’s head time and time again often seeing if there was something that could be changed, improved or altered to influence the events. But with death, it is a one way ticket. No chance for do overs or alterations. Probably the biggest thing that really sticks with me is Sarah’s terrible suffering that last night. I wanted so badly to take that away from her! Time has a way of putting things in perspective though. And I have realized that there is great value to that kind of suffering. It purified her for heaven, and gave me courage to face whatever may come down the road.
Grandma and Grampa Pal, the girls and I went to Ditto’s for lunch after Mass. It was our way of celebrating Sarah’s life. It was a good time. Lots of good memories and good food. After lunch, I stopped by the cemetery and said hello to my dear. I think that I will forever see her laying there in her red dress and multicolored “head rag”. One day, I’ll be next to her. And now that thought doesn’t bother me anymore.
The grief is still there, usually only when something specific pops up like a song or musical interlude. Sarah was so intertwined with music that I often feel the loss most in that arena. Frequently, I can still hear her cantoring at the 9:30 Mass. I am so happy that we had such a good marriage and life together. Almost all hours of our 9 + year married life were spent under the same roof. we wanted it that way and structured our lifestyles to reflect that choice. As a result we got to know each other very well, warts and all.
Thank you everyone so much for reading my notes here over the past 2 years. Some days I can’t believe that I have been updating for that long!
Peace to all of you, and thank you for your prayers.
Chris
Life keeps rolling along around here. Each day is a different adventure. Today was bread day. Zoebo asked to help me make our usual 6 loaves this evening. I said sure. Theresa mentioned the other day that one of her very favorite experiences was coming into the house and smelling fresh bread baking.
It usually takes us about 8 to 10 days to go through 6 loaves. Tonight Zoe put out a lot of effort measuring the ingredients and kneading the dough. She got to make a special loaf all by herself. What a special, sweet and really caring young girl she is. During the dough making process she said that she wanted to get good at it so that she could make bread for her children. I told her that mommy would approve. I also suggested that before she makes bread for her own family she makes bread for me and her sisters first! We both got a chuckle out of it.
Ingrid had a checkup the other day. She is at about the 85th percentile for weight, but “off the chart” for height. The nurse practitioner still thinks she may be 6 feet tall when it is all said and done. A few days ago, she and I had lunch with mommy. We visited Sarah at the cemetery, said a few prayers and then sat down on the raised grave marker for lunch. I began to talk to Ingy about mommy and how special she was. During our conversation I asked her if she remembered anything about mommy. She promptly said yes. “I remember mommy and me throwing rocks in the pond where the ducks were.” Ingy also said that she liked the way mommy wrapped her up in “little blee” like a burrito. Ingy also said that mommy taught me how to wrap her for bed, burrito style. She was right. I was impressed with how much she remembered.
So often I get this feeling that Sarah is smiling and is very happy with the way our little family is going. There is a wonderful sense of peace around here. As we close in on the 2nd anniversary of her departure, I have to admit that some days I have short very intense grief episodes. But overall, there is this sense of joy and peace in our happy home... It is very busy too!
Peace everyone, thank you for your love and prayers. We are most grateful for you.
Chris
Theresa wants me to take dictation from her for a little while so here it goes.
Hello everybody, School has been going great, except for the fact that our teacher say that we need more Latin homework! Today we learned our 4 times tables. I forgot how to do them, even though I used to be able to jot them down in seconds last spring. I forgot them because I have been doing stuff like 1 +1 for months!
Although I am glad we finished unit 1 in grammar, (our most boring and dull subject) I can’t believe we had a dull easy quiz over it BOOOO! Mr. Ashby tortured us in Gym today! Torture with a capital T!!! I like playing Nucum a sport like volleyball. We pretend that the ball is an atomic bomb and throw it.
Also on Friday, I am going to give a little program on Hieroglyphics and Egyptology to our home school group. -Daddy interjects- Theresa wants to talk A LOT about this and her Harry Potter stories but daddy says that it is bed time!
There you have it. The mind of Theresa.
She has been writing another chapter book complete with illustrations. This one is called “In the eyes of Nellie”. These are stories about girls and their made up adventures. They are quite humorous and creative. She tells me she is going to make a book for each of her girl classmates.
The other girls are growing well too. I’m tired so I will call it a night.
Thanks everyone for your prayers.
Peace.
Chris
Happy ought-6 and may all your resolutions be accomplished.... At least for a while!
The girls have certainly been busy this break. I have had a little time to reflect on what has transpired over the past 4 weeks, and I am amazed at what they have accomplished. It seems like they put play and learning into overdrive. Of course we only had 2 birthdays, a big Christmas party, Christmas proper, social gatherings and new years.
Theresa began the Harry Potter series on her birthday and completed 3 books (#’s 2,3 and 4). She and her sisters used their various Christmas / birthday gifts quite a lot too. Thank you everyone! Theresa just informed me that she wants to be fluent in Latin, Greek and Egyptian Hieroglyphics. I asked Zoebo what her favorite Christmas present was and she said without out much hesitation, “Daddy!” Needless to say she scored big with that one!
Zoe wanted to do more math work on our chalk board in the basement, so I started her out with multiplication tables. If her interest continues, she will probably have them all down by summer. Zoebo is bored with addition and subtraction.
Ingrid has been asking me to give her simple words to spell and write. She hasn’t quite taken the jump into reading yet, although she knows how to read short words. Her letter printing is becoming quite legible too. It is only a matter of time with her. She has been my little helper at a client’s house this week while I installed a closet.
This evening, the girls asked me when they could go to Gulf Shores. They are ready for spring break after only the second day back at school! They love going down to visit Grandma and Grampa K., and , of course, play on the beach.
I hope everyone has a very good and blessed year. I remember Sarah really stressed how important each day was. And that we only have this time right now. Living in the present moment is sometimes quite a challenge for me. However, the girls make sure that I don’t stray too far into the future.
Peace everyone, good night.
Chris
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