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Thursday, November 6, 2008 10:27 AM CST

Another six weeks has passed and Keegan is doing well. He has hit the six months OT mark, WAAHOO!!! Yesterday Dr. Lew said that he can stop taking bactrim now also, and that was very significant to me. Keegan is now not taking any medications related to leukemia. He still has asthma meds, but that’s different. He no longer has any cancer meds. His counts are looking great, showing no weirdness in them at all, thank God.

As usual, I cried…except I waited until I was away from everyone. It is so very difficult for me to be there at the clinic, I find myself so filled with anxiety and guilt while I am there and I hate that. I believe fully that God is in control of my life and Keegan’s outcome, but that doesn’t stop my motherly fear from kicking in when we visit the building where all the pain took place, physical and emotional. We are pressing forward and I am still trying to sort it out.

I haven’t been on here talking about it a lot because I really do not know how to address my feelings. Our family is celebrating and loving life right now, but we also are still grieving the loss of so many of our friends that we loved and think of daily. Keegan still shows the scars of those losses. Yesterday he drew two pictures of Baby Eric…One picture was a medical book like picture where he illustrated where all the veins and internal organs are. In it he demonstrated where the cancer was and when I asked him about it, he explained to me what he thought happened to Eric, and he was pretty accurate. Then he drew another picture of Eric in Heaven with wings and a crown. He wrote on that one, “Heaven is where we live forever”. It was beautiful and it brought me to tears.

A couple of weeks ago Keegan asked to be baptized. I am overwhelmed with joy that my son is accepting Jesus into his life. We have talked to him and he surely understands the implications. Keegan knows who Jesus is, my son prayed for mercy and healing for himself and his buddies and God answered his prayers. Keegan has learned at a very tender age that sometimes our prayers are not answered exactly the way we think they should be and that God is always on our side.

Ok, I will close this out now by asking you all to continue praying for children that are suffering everywhere. Keegan doesn’t have to go back until December 29th, that’s TWO WHOLE MONTHS!!!! YIPIE!!!! Hopefully I will update before then, but please don’t be surprised if I don’t; I am working through all of this in slow time. And if I don't update, Happy Thanksgiving and Merry Christmas! :)

Love and hugs to all of you,
Audra

Monday, September 29, 2008 3:06 PM CDT

I come to update about once a day…then I get stuck and can’t make it past the first few sentences. I can’t figure out why.

Keegan is doing well. Counts have been normal and good since being off treatment.YAY! He had his first no port poke last week, I was impressed, he used emla, asked the tech to count to 10 before doing it, and then he sat on my lap and didn’t cry a bit. He was brave which is no surprise. Dr. Lew checked him out and declared him to be doing well overall and that is great.

Things have been trucking along and you all know that I have had problems updating because of the emotional aspect of it. That hasn’t changed. I just find it hard to re-live any of it, or even talk about it. The only way I can see to get through that is helping out when I can and doing fundraising when I can. Keegan’s baseball team is raising money for Coaches Curing Kids Cancer and I am pretty excited about that. It is also wonderful to just watch Keegan play and have fun doing it.

The kids are all doing well and it is getting really busy here since school started, I feel like every day of the month is filled with stuff to do. We are adjusting to this new normal and are still so thankful that this is the normal we have to deal with. It’s an adjustment, but it is on the rise. Thanks to God.

Love and hugs,
Audra




Thank you everyone for praying for Keegan, please keep it up, He is listening.

GOD IS IN CONTROL!!!
GOD‘S GOT US!!!

“We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain, where Jesus, who went before us, has entered on our behalf.” Hebrews 6:19-20

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
1 Corinthians 13:4-7

“Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.”
Hebrews 11:1

“Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptable with reverence and awe, for our God is a consuming fire.”
Hebrews 12:28-29

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.”
James 1:2-3

“The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer, My God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation.”
2 Samuel 22:2-3

I AM…
By Keegan Puckett

I am Happy and cool
I wonder if i can play video games
I hear vouses and a truck
I see people and a phone
I want pizza and hot wings
I am Happy and cool

I pretend too Sleep and sneeac
I feel Skin and hats
I touch wals and windows
I worry I’ll break my leg agin
I cry when I hert my self
I am Happy and cool

I understand That drugs are bad
I say cool
I dream that I’m gana be a cop
I try to get rid of my canser
I hope that I don’t diye
I am Happy and cool

Wednesday, August 20, 2008 8:41 PM CDT

That first time Keegan got his port, I remember standing in the hallway with Mike crying as I watched “them” wheel my baby down the hall in a little red wagon for his first surgery. Keegan had some versed so was pretty happy, he turned and waved at Mike and I and said “I love you mommy”.

I cried. And I remember his oncologist in Colorado, Dr. Albano saying to me, “Don’t worry, we’ll give him back to you the same way you gave him to us”.

That is what I thought of today when they wheeled Keegan back into the room. His port is out. Keegan has had his last surgery, some people say, “don’t say that, you could jinx it”, but I don’t care, my son just FINISHED this.

I cried…big surprise, right?

Now, for the super exciting news…

On Tuesday this week, look at what Keegan was doing…



That is a beautiful sight.

Love and hugs,
Audra

Thank you everyone for praying for Keegan, please keep it up, He is listening.

GOD IS IN CONTROL!!!
GOD‘S GOT US!!!

“We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain, where Jesus, who went before us, has entered on our behalf.” Hebrews 6:19-20

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
1 Corinthians 13:4-7

“Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.”
Hebrews 11:1

“Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptable with reverence and awe, for our God is a consuming fire.”
Hebrews 12:28-29

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.”
James 1:2-3

“The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer, My God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation.”
2 Samuel 22:2-3

I AM…
By Keegan Puckett

I am Happy and cool
I wonder if i can play video games
I hear vouses and a truck
I see people and a phone
I want pizza and hot wings
I am Happy and cool

I pretend too Sleep and sneeac
I feel Skin and hats
I touch wals and windows
I worry I’ll break my leg agin
I cry when I hert my self
I am Happy and cool

I understand That drugs are bad
I say cool
I dream that I’m gana be a cop
I try to get rid of my canser
I hope that I don’t diye
I am Happy and cool

Tuesday, August 12, 2008 5:47 PM CDT

I realize that I have not been great about updating…I guess I am having a little writers block mixed with feelings and emotions I really don’t know how to express.

Coming on Caringbridge is kind of like going through the halls of Aflac for me, it just makes me sad. I am trying so hard to forget what Keegan went through and I just cannot do that here. I feel torn. There is so much pain that I see and feel when I am up at the hospital, and I feel that also when I am on Caringbridge.

I look at my son now, and the evidence of cancer treatment is slowly disappearing, what a beautiful thing. He is doing so well. On August 20th, he will have his port removed and the remainder of his teeth filled and crowned. Four of the 8 teeth that he had removed last year have been replaced by adult teeth.

The start of this school year was much more significant than ever for us. Keegan started his first year of school without the cloud of chemotherapy over him. He has hair, only a small limp and most of his teeth. The dark circles under his eyes are going away and when you look at him, you no longer think, “wow, that kid looks sick.” He’s never been to school fully healthy, and I know he is still recovering, but he is recovering quickly. It’s just wonderful and amazing.

And yet, I cannot shake the sadness. I am still so angry. Our friend Tyler Copley passed away last week. Our other friend Tyler M. relapsed for the 3rd time. These things are just fuel for my anger. I am trying hard to find an avenue for that, I am sure I can do some good in the cancer world if I can just focus.

Please bear with me while I sort this all out.

Love and hugs,
Audra



Thank you everyone for praying for Keegan, please keep it up, He is listening.

GOD IS IN CONTROL!!!
GOD‘S GOT US!!!

“We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain, where Jesus, who went before us, has entered on our behalf.” Hebrews 6:19-20

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
1 Corinthians 13:4-7

“Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.”
Hebrews 11:1

“Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptable with reverence and awe, for our God is a consuming fire.”
Hebrews 12:28-29

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.”
James 1:2-3

“The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer, My God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation.”
2 Samuel 22:2-3

I AM…
By Keegan Puckett

I am Happy and cool
I wonder if i can play video games
I hear vouses and a truck
I see people and a phone
I want pizza and hot wings
I am Happy and cool

I pretend too Sleep and sneeac
I feel Skin and hats
I touch wals and windows
I worry I’ll break my leg agin
I cry when I hert my self
I am Happy and cool

I understand That drugs are bad
I say cool
I dream that I’m gana be a cop
I try to get rid of my canser
I hope that I don’t diye
I am Happy and cool

Wednesday, July 2, 2008 8:50 PM CDT

Hey! We are ready for Keegan’s party, and everyone’s invited!!!!!

Come join us for Keegan’s off treatment celebration! We’re having food, music, and lots of family fun! We want to celebrate with everyone who have been with us along the way. Maybe you made us dinner, offered a hug, an ear, maybe you helped financially, maybe you prayed in silence for us…we want you there!

The party is on July 26, a Saturday, from 3 to 6. It will be at our wonderful church, Christ Church at Whitewater, 1577 Hwy 85 S., Fayetteville, GA 30215.

I absolutely have to have an accurate count, so please click on this link and

Keegan’s Party sign up for the fun! We are so happy and excited to be able to celebrate this huge milestone with everyone. Keegan has been looking forward to this for three years. We can’t wait to see you there.

Love and hugs,
Audra

Thank you everyone for praying for Keegan, please keep it up, He is listening.

GOD IS IN CONTROL!!!
GOD‘S GOT US!!!

“We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain, where Jesus, who went before us, has entered on our behalf.” Hebrews 6:19-20

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
1 Corinthians 13:4-7

“Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.”
Hebrews 11:1

“Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptable with reverence and awe, for our God is a consuming fire.”
Hebrews 12:28-29

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.”
James 1:2-3

“The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer, My God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation.”
2 Samuel 22:2-3

I AM…
By Keegan Puckett

I am Happy and cool
I wonder if i can play video games
I hear vouses and a truck
I see people and a phone
I want pizza and hot wings
I am Happy and cool

I pretend too Sleep and sneeac
I feel Skin and hats
I touch wals and windows
I worry I’ll break my leg agin
I cry when I hert my self
I am Happy and cool

I understand That drugs are bad
I say cool
I dream that I’m gana be a cop
I try to get rid of my canser
I hope that I don’t diye
I am Happy and cool

Wednesday, June 18, 2008 0:10 AM CDT

Last year we lost some friends. One day we went into the hospital to get chemo and the Vickers showed up unexpectedly because Austin had a fever. Beth (Austin's mom) and I stayed up too late in the family room complaining that the rooms were grossly dirty, then we made inappropriate jokes about our husbands. I went to bed that night thinking she is so funny and such a nut. The next day I found myself at the Children’s Hospital Chapel sobbing in prayer with Bridget, James mom. We prayed that Austin was ok; we prayed that the reality we knew was happening was different. I looked in Bridget’s eyes and cried, she comforted me. One month later, James went to heaven.

I’m not really sure why I haven’t updated in a month. I’ve kind of been reflecting on things. We went to the clinic on Monday. Our first ever off-treatment visit. Pretty uneventful. Keegan’s counts are pretty good and heading in an upward direction which is great. We’ve had a few interesting moments this past month. No matter what, we are going to be worried and going to the wrong place with normal kid aches and pains, the key is to not call the doctor for every bruise, bump, ache, pain or eyelash that falls out.

I am having a time of it, emotionally. Not really sure where to go from here. You know, I am doing well pretending to be normal. I got a job working with my friend Amanda, little Eric’s mom. I am pretty excited about that. Ariel is in Colorado visiting with her dad, grandma and little bro David. She’ll be there until the 3rd week of July. Amanda is leaving this morning to visit for a week.

Keegan’s off-treatment party is on July the 26th. Everyone is invited, I will be putting an Evite invitation up and y’all can respond to it. It’s going to be so much fun!!!! We’re having it at our church, I am hoping to rent some bouncy thingies, we’ll have karoke, food, celebration, and FUN!!!!!!!! Mark the day and keep your eye out for the invitation.

Ok, wish me luck, I start my job on Thursday.

Thank you to everyone for the well wishes in the guest book. Today I was reading them again and tears came to my eyes feeling everyones love.

Love and hugs,
Audra

Thank you everyone for praying for Keegan, please keep it up, He is listening.

GOD IS IN CONTROL!!!
GOD‘S GOT US!!!

“We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain, where Jesus, who went before us, has entered on our behalf.” Hebrews 6:19-20

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
1 Corinthians 13:4-7

“Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.”
Hebrews 11:1

“Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptable with reverence and awe, for our God is a consuming fire.”
Hebrews 12:28-29

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.”
James 1:2-3

“The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer, My God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation.”
2 Samuel 22:2-3

I AM…
By Keegan Puckett

I am Happy and cool
I wonder if i can play video games
I hear vouses and a truck
I see people and a phone
I want pizza and hot wings
I am Happy and cool

I pretend too Sleep and sneeac
I feel Skin and hats
I touch wals and windows
I worry I’ll break my leg agin
I cry when I hert my self
I am Happy and cool

I understand That drugs are bad
I say cool
I dream that I’m gana be a cop
I try to get rid of my canser
I hope that I don’t diye
I am Happy and cool

Tuesday, May 20, 2008 5:33 PM CDT

WEEK 105 OUT OF 105

IT’S FINALLY DONE!

COUNTS
Absolute Neutrophil Count (ANC): 1100
Hemoglobin (HGB): 11.6
Platelets: 436,000

Remember that song? Here comes the sun?

Here comes the sun, here comes the sun,
and I say it's all right

Little darling, it's been a long cold lonely winter
Little darling, it feels like years since it's been here
Here comes the sun, here comes the sun
and I say it's all right

Little darling, the smiles returning to the faces
Little darling, it seems like years since it's been here
Here comes the sun, here comes the sun
and I say it's all right

Sun, sun, sun, here it comes...
Sun, sun, sun, here it comes...
Sun, sun, sun, here it comes...
Sun, sun, sun, here it comes...
Sun, sun, sun, here it comes...

Little darling, I feel that ice is slowly melting
Little darling, it seems like years since it's been clear
Here comes the sun, here comes the sun,
and I say it's all right
It's all right

It played on the radio on the way up to the clinic yesterday. I cried. Mike smiled. That’s exactly how we feel. Yesterday was the most wonderful day, but I am emotionally spent now. I have cried buckets of tears in the last few weeks and it doesn’t look like the faucet is going to turn off anytime soon. Of course, I can’t really cry in front of anyone, so I held it in all day yesterday then had an extra long cry-fest before bed. It’s not like I’m sobbing, they are just falling out of my eyes like I have C.D. (crying disease).

Keegan’s doctor and nurses were wonderful. They gave Keegan a present and celebrated with us. I was really happy that his favorite two infusion nurses were there.



Patty and Karen. Both of them love Keegan like their own. Both of them love me and are very supportive. I love all the Aflac nurses, in fact, there is not one that I hate or don’t like, but you know…Everyone has their favorites, these are mine.

Here it is, his last chemo…


It was an emotional roller coaster for Keegan also, and I am so glad he was able to express his feelings on the subject. There were times that he was happy, angry, scared, relieved and sad, and he was able to talk about that each time. It hit me hard when he told me he is afraid it will come back.



Thank you for all of your prayers, we are out of the storm.

Love and hugs,
Audra

Thank you everyone for praying for Keegan, please keep it up, He is listening.

GOD IS IN CONTROL!!!
GOD‘S GOT US!!!

“We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain, where Jesus, who went before us, has entered on our behalf.” Hebrews 6:19-20

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
1 Corinthians 13:4-7

“Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.”
Hebrews 11:1

“Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptable with reverence and awe, for our God is a consuming fire.”
Hebrews 12:28-29

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.”
James 1:2-3

“The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer, My God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation.”
2 Samuel 22:2-3

I AM…
By Keegan Puckett

I am Happy and cool
I wonder if i can play video games
I hear vouses and a truck
I see people and a phone
I want pizza and hot wings
I am Happy and cool

I pretend too Sleep and sneeac
I feel Skin and hats
I touch wals and windows
I worry I’ll break my leg agin
I cry when I hert my self
I am Happy and cool

I understand That drugs are bad
I say cool
I dream that I’m gana be a cop
I try to get rid of my canser
I hope that I don’t diye
I am Happy and cool

Monday, May 12, 2008 2:18 PM

WEEK 104 OUT OF 105

SEVEN DAYS LEFT!!!!

COUNTS
Absolute Neutrophil Count (ANC): 2140
Hemoglobin (HGB): 11.9
Platelets: 470,000

We are at clinic. Keegan is getting his last ivig ever, his last pentamidine ever and his 2nd to the last chemo. WEEE!!!! We got here at 9:30 am and should leave around 3:00 p.m. Last week was pretty decent. Our friend Ethan got good news, his tumors are not bigger, he get’s a port on Monday and goes back on chemo soon after. Our friend Tyler did WONDERFUL for his lung surgery! He had it on Monday and came home on Saturday! Unbelievable!

We are at clinic right now getting ivig (immune builder), pentamidine (antibiotic), cytoxin and vincristine (chemos). They will switch Keegan to oral antibiotics next month and his port will be removed before school starts in August.

Friday was our five year crapiversary. Five years. Can you believe that? I wrote this to my email support group…

“I just can't believe it is finally going to be done. I am so happy, scared,
scarred, sad, anxious, excited, hopeful, thankful, pretty much everything. And the crying thing, I can feel myself letting my guard down and letting go, and all I can do is cry for all that has happened this past 5 years. Friday was our 5 year crap-iversary. Five years. Can you believe that? We have seen so many children fight this battle and win with no issues, win with issues and lose. It really breaks my heart when I think of the enormity of it all. All of those children, all of the suffering.

And I have no idea what I am going to do now with all my extra time. I don't know how to be the Audra from before, and I won't have to be the "chemo mom" Audra. What in the heck am I going to do?”

That pretty much sums it up for me. It will be interesting getting adjusted to another “new normal”.

I planted a “bucket” garden on Saturday. We have tomatoes, green peppers, zucchini, cucumbers, green beans, lettuce, spinach and carrots. I’m not sure if the zucchini and lettuce will come up, but at least we tried. While the boys and I were working on it we heard a commotion coming from the bushes. Our cat was trying to have a baby bird for lunch; he had already had the baby bird’s brother for breakfast. We managed to save it, but he keeps jumping out of his nest so we have to keep putting him back. I went online and found out that you can and should pick up a baby bird that has fallen out of its nest, and put it back. Its parents won’t care. And these birds don’t seem to care; they seem to rely on us to keep their baby in the nest. So now we have to check the baby bird all the time and keep the cat inside. It’s worth it; the kids are really enjoying keeping an eye out for him. They are learning that they need to keep a good distance and give the parent birds room to feel safe to feed the baby.

Thank you for all of your prayers, we are coming out of the storm.

Love and hugs,
Audra

Thank you everyone for praying for Keegan, please keep it up, He is listening.

GOD IS IN CONTROL!!!
GOD‘S GOT US!!!

“We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain, where Jesus, who went before us, has entered on our behalf.” Hebrews 6:19-20

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
1 Corinthians 13:4-7

“Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.”
Hebrews 11:1

“Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptable with reverence and awe, for our God is a consuming fire.”
Hebrews 12:28-29

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.”
James 1:2-3

“The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer, My God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation.”
2 Samuel 22:2-3

I AM…
By Keegan Puckett

I am Happy and cool
I wonder if i can play video games
I hear vouses and a truck
I see people and a phone
I want pizza and hot wings
I am Happy and cool

I pretend too Sleep and sneeac
I feel Skin and hats
I touch wals and windows
I worry I’ll break my leg agin
I cry when I hert my self
I am Happy and cool

I understand That drugs are bad
I say cool
I dream that I’m gana be a cop
I try to get rid of my canser
I hope that I don’t diye
I am Happy and cool

Monday, May 5, 2008 1:32 PM CDT

WEEK 103 OUT OF 105

COUNTS
Absolute Neutrophil Count (ANC): 2140
Hemoglobin (HGB): 11.9
Platelets: 470,000

Today is taking forever. It took over an hour to get Keegan’s counts back and then another hour for him to pee in a cup. Now that he’s finally pee’d, it’s taking forever to get his chemo hooked up.

It’s hard not to “reminisce” about the beginning right now. Being at the clinic is surreal and the thought of being off therapy is almost not believable. It reminds me of when I graduating high school, or when I was in labor with Amanda…Exciting, but a little bit scary.

We had a good weekend. Friday was the Relay for Life,very emotional. Keegan ran all the way around that track with a smile on his face, by himself with the torch and hundreds of people cheering him on. I will post a pic once I have the time to download them off my camera. Sunday was the Cure picnic, and Saturday we went to Karaoke with the Musslewhite family. Keegan and Tyler sang In The End by Lynkin Park. Tyler’s mom, Gina cried watching them. She said that in light of Tyler’s surgery, the song is very fitting. Here are the lyrics…

In The End

(It starts with)
One thing / I don’t know why
It doesn’t even matter how hard you try
Keep that in mind / I designed this rhyme
To explain in due time
All I know
time is a valuable thing
Watch it fly by as the pendulum swings
Watch it count down to the end of the day
The clock ticks life away
It’s so unreal
Didn’t look out below
Watch the time go right out the window
Trying to hold on / but didn’t even know
Wasted it all just to
Watch you go
I kept everything inside and even though I tried / it all fell apart
What it meant to me / will eventually / be a memory / of a time when I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end
It doesn't even matter
I had to fall
To lose it all
But in the end
It doesn't even matter
One thing / I don’t know why
It doesn’t even matter how hard you try
Keep that in mind / I designed this rhyme
To remind myself how
I tried so hard
In spite of the way you were mocking me
Acting like I was part of your property
Remembering all the times you fought with me
I’m surprised it got so (far)
Things aren’t the way they were before
You wouldn’t even recognize me anymore
Not that you knew me back then
But it all comes back to me
In the end
You kept everything inside and even though I tried / it all fell apart
What it meant to me / will eventually / be a memory / of a time when I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end
It doesn’t even matter
I had to fall
To lose it all
But in the end
It doesn’t even matter
I've put my trust in you
Pushed as far as I can go
For all this
There’s only one thing you should know
I've put my trust in you
Pushed as far as I can go
For all this
There’s only one thing you should know
I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end
It doesn’t even matter
I had to fall
To lose it all
But in the end
It doesn’t even matter
********************

You can see why we both got a little emotional seeing eight and ten year olds with cancer singing that song.

I was talking to someone the other day, not a cancer parent. She was asking me about cancer, cure rates for leukemia and such. I am very sensitive about that issue, because I feel like sometimes people ask that question so they can feel better about my child having cancer, and that is not ok with me. Anyway, she said something about leukemia being a blood disease, not cancer. I didn’t call her on that, but it really pissed me off. And just to make the record strait, leukemia is a blood cancer. It is not the same as bone cancer or soft tissue cancer, or a brain tumor, ect, but it IS cancer. Also, I try not to deal with percentages because either 100 percent my kid will make it, or 100 percent he won’t. Basically, my faith is not in a number, it is in God. An 80 percent “cure” rate for initial diagnosis of leukemia, (like back when Keegan was diagnosed), is not a real “cure” rate, it is an “efs”, event free survival. Event free for five years. If a child goes 5 years off chemo without relapse, then some medical institutions call it cured. Some don’t. Not only that, but the statistics do not include everyone that got leukemia, there are many factors that go into it. After Keegan relapsed, I spoke briefly with his dr about the percentages, and then I put it on a shelf and never looked at it again. I have full faith that God is guiding us and is taking care of us, so I don’t need man made faith.

I know we are getting to the end here are there are a lot of people out there that are grateful that they don’t have to hear about cancer from us anymore. And I guess I understand that train of thought, but it still makes me uncomfortable. For the last five years I have been listening to other people, (not everyone, just some people) minimize what my son has gone through and what he has faced, and frankly, I am so dang sick and tired of it. I am sick of other people acting as if there are not children out there that have died from leukemia. I know there are because I have met them. I am also sick and tired of making everyone else feel good about my son having cancer, which is just not my responsibility.

As we were waiting to be called back this morning, I waited in the waiting room, looking over at the sweet blond lady whose name I still don’t know after 3 years of coming here. I remember that day I had to drive Keegan in for a bone marrow aspiration to check for a relapse in his bone marrow, (we already knew he relapsed in his spinal fluid), she looked up at me as I struggled to hold the tears back and said, “How are you doing? Are you guys ok?” It was all I could do to not start sobbing, but I lied. And she knew I was lying. Then she gave me a hug and told me it was going to be alright. She was not lying, she was right.



What a Wonderful World


I see trees of green, red roses too
I see them bloom for me and you
And I think to myself what a wonderful world.

I see skies of blue and clouds of white
The bright blessed day, the dark sacred night
And I think to myself what a wonderful world.

The colors of the rainbow so pretty in the sky
Are also on the faces of people going by
I see friends shaking hands saying how do you do
They're really saying I love you.

I hear babies cry, I watch them grow
They'll learn much more than I'll never know
And I think to myself what a wonderful world
Yes I think to myself what a wonderful world.

Thanks to everyone for your continued prayers. Thank you to all of you who are not sick and tired of this cancer stuff. Thank you to all of you who may be sick of it, but have the good sense to keep that to yourselves.


Please pray hard tonight for Ethan, our friend. His CT scan tomorrow is a big deal. After a forced off chemo, we pray that God has given Ethan his miracle for his cancer and his heart. I will help his grandma update his website tomorrow after we find out what is going on.

Tyler Musslewhite is having his lung surgery to remove the cancerous tumors out of his lungs tomorrow. He should be in the hospital for 7 to 10 days. Please pray that everything goes as planned and that they get every tiny speck of cancer out of him.

Love and hugs,
Audra

GOD IS IN CONTROL!!!
GOD‘S GOT US!!!

“We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain, where Jesus, who went before us, has entered on our behalf.” Hebrews 6:19-20

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
1 Corinthians 13:4-7

“Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.”
Hebrews 11:1

“Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptable with reverence and awe, for our God is a consuming fire.”
Hebrews 12:28-29

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.”
James 1:2-3

“The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer, My God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation.”
2 Samuel 22:2-3

I AM…
By Keegan Puckett

I am Happy and cool
I wonder if i can play video games
I hear vouses and a truck
I see people and a phone
I want pizza and hot wings
I am Happy and cool

I pretend too Sleep and sneeac
I feel Skin and hats
I touch wals and windows
I worry I’ll break my leg agin
I cry when I hert my self
I am Happy and cool

I understand That drugs are bad
I say cool
I dream that I’m gana be a cop
I try to get rid of my canser
I hope that I don’t diye
I am Happy and cool

Monday, April 28, 2008 11:59 PM

WEEK 102 OUT OF 105

COUNTS
Absolute Neutrophil Count (ANC): 2830
Hemoglobin (HGB): 11.9
Platelets: 400,000

Keegan is doing great. We were at clinic today for vincristine and cytoxin. Not a bad day, we were out by 4 and that was nice. We also got to see a few of our hospital chemo buddies, Jake, Payton and Haley. I’d put all the great pics up, but my computer isn’t cooperating, or maybe I am just tired.

We are gearing up for Mike to come home this week. He has been on the road for a year now, we see him about 4 to 6 days a month. It is not working at all. He is coming home for good. Please pray that he is able to find work right away and that we can all adjust to this fairly well.

I put some pictures up on my myspace account, I look just like my mommie, it’s funny…http://www.myspace.com/weirdpuckett. Also, it’s fun to see the kids.

Thanks to everyone for their prayers. We have some more…
Eleanor Barber from the Lighthouse Family Retreat is having hip replacement surgery on the 5th.

Ethan Patterson is having a CT scan to see if his tumors in his lungs are growing.

Tyler Musslewhite has relapsed with osteosarcoma in his lung. This will be his second relapse in the lungs. His surgery and Ethans scans are on May 6th.

Please keep them in prayer.
Love and hugs,
Audra

“We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain, where Jesus, who went before us, has entered on our behalf.” Hebrews 6:19-20

Keegan is going to be carrying the torch for the Relay for Life in Fayette County this year, and walking the survivor lap. His school raises funds every year for the American Cancer Society and last year raised 15,000 I believe. They have made Keegan their little mascot for the school. It has been so therapeutic for him and cool. He and a few of the staff designed a t-shirt that says “Keegan’s Kickers”. It’s very cool and Keegan feels like a little celebrity in school. The shirts are $10 I believe, and if you want one, let me know and I will figure out how you can get one or at least get you in touch with the lady who is in charge of all that.

Thank you everyone for praying for Keegan, please keep it up, He is listening.

GOD IS IN CONTROL!!!
GOD‘S GOT US!!!

“We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain, where Jesus, who went before us, has entered on our behalf.” Hebrews 6:19-20

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
1 Corinthians 13:4-7

“Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.”
Hebrews 11:1

“Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptable with reverence and awe, for our God is a consuming fire.”
Hebrews 12:28-29

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.”
James 1:2-3

“The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer, My God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation.”
2 Samuel 22:2-3

I AM…
By Keegan Puckett

I am Happy and cool
I wonder if i can play video games
I hear vouses and a truck
I see people and a phone
I want pizza and hot wings
I am Happy and cool

I pretend too Sleep and sneeac
I feel Skin and hats
I touch wals and windows
I worry I’ll break my leg agin
I cry when I hert my self
I am Happy and cool

I understand That drugs are bad
I say cool
I dream that I’m gana be a cop
I try to get rid of my canser
I hope that I don’t diye
I am Happy and cool

Tuesday, April 15, 2008 11:25 PM

WEEK 99 ? OUT OF 105

COUNTS
Absolute Neutrophil Count (ANC): 3310
Hemoglobin (HGB): 11.6
Platelets: 323,000

Keegan’s counts are great. He has a little cold right now and had to come home from school today. He is not running a fever so he should be ok. I am sorry I have not updated lately, I have been pre-occupied. I am still working through all these emotions that go along with him going off treatment. He will take his last oral medication on the 27th of this month and we are SOOOO excited about that.

The Celebration of Courage was wonderful on Saturday, except the rain. It was very emotional seeing the children carrying their torches around. Here is a picture of Keegan carrying it on his turn…

So cute isn’t it? It was great and I think that it will get bigger each year.

I don’t have much time because I have to get to bed. Please continue your constant prayers for all of our friends in this battle. Right now I ask you to pray for Krystle, her grandma and our friend Ethan. Ethan is having a lot of issues and needs a lot of prayers. Thank you.

“We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain, where Jesus, who went before us, has entered on our behalf.” Hebrews 6:19-20

Keegan is going to be carrying the torch for the Relay for Life in Fayette County this year, and walking the survivor lap. His school raises funds every year for the American Cancer Society and last year raised 15,000 I believe. They have made Keegan their little mascot for the school. It has been so therapeutic for him and cool. He and a few of the staff designed a t-shirt that says “Keegan’s Kickers”. It’s very cool and Keegan feels like a little celebrity in school. The shirts are $10 I believe, and if you want one, let me know and I will figure out how you can get one or at least get you in touch with the lady who is in charge of all that.

Thank you everyone for praying for Keegan, please keep it up, He is listening.

GOD IS IN CONTROL!!!
GOD‘S GOT US!!!

“We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain, where Jesus, who went before us, has entered on our behalf.” Hebrews 6:19-20

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
1 Corinthians 13:4-7

“Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.”
Hebrews 11:1

“Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptable with reverence and awe, for our God is a consuming fire.”
Hebrews 12:28-29

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.”
James 1:2-3

“The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer, My God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation.”
2 Samuel 22:2-3

I AM…
By Keegan Puckett

I am Happy and cool
I wonder if i can play video games
I hear vouses and a truck
I see people and a phone
I want pizza and hot wings
I am Happy and cool

I pretend too Sleep and sneeac
I feel Skin and hats
I touch wals and windows
I worry I’ll break my leg agin
I cry when I hert my self
I am Happy and cool

I understand That drugs are bad
I say cool
I dream that I’m gana be a cop
I try to get rid of my canser
I hope that I don’t diye
I am Happy and cool

Monday, March 31, 2008 12:09 PM

Please pray for our friends. Baby Eric the Warrior went to Heaven on Thursday. What a beautiful little boy and what a beautiful family. Our hearts break again. We will miss his funny little laugh and the way he talks like he is everyone’s boss. I love hearing him say “MAMA!” when I would call and keep his mommy occupied for too long. Oh, we will miss Eric so much. Please pray for the Meraz family while they struggle with grief. www.caringbridge.org/visit/ericmeraz Please pray for all of us that knew and loved that little boy. We were touched by his courage and his will to fight the beast until the end. Keegan and I were touched by his smile, to make Eric smile was a task well rewarded.

The loss of Eric has brought many emotions from our entire family it seems. We went to Eric’s viewing on Friday. Amanda, Keegan and I went in to hug Rick, Amanda and Alyssa also to say goodbye to Eric. Keegan really felt he should go but then struggled with that pain after as did Amanda and I. Ariel has had off and on crying since Friday and Liam asked me a question I don’t know if I’ll get over any time soon, “Mommy, do all kids with cancer die?” I didn’t know how to answer him and I still don’t. I don’t know why this keeps happening! These children are too precious and too wonderful. Eric was a gem of a child with parents that have unbreakable faith. I just don’t understand the why, and I never will. We have to get more research going on childhood cancers that have such low statistics; we have to start bringing the “curve” up for every one of these children. The event free survival and overall survival rates for ATRT is insane and unacceptable! It is NOT ok! This is not ok and we need more child cancer research.

Please just pray for the Meraz family and pray for all the children fighting cancer right now.

“We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain, where Jesus, who went before us, has entered on our behalf.” Hebrews 6:19-20

Love, Audra


Keegan is going to be carrying the torch for the Relay for Life in Fayette County this year, and walking the survivor lap. His school raises funds every year for the American Cancer Society and last year raised 15,000 I believe. They have made Keegan their little mascot for the school. It has been so therapeutic for him and cool. He and a few of the staff designed a t-shirt that says “Keegan’s Kickers”. It’s very cool and Keegan feels like a little celebrity in school. The shirts are $10 I believe, and if you want one, let me know and I will figure out how you can get one or at least get you in touch with the lady who is in charge of all that.

Also, he will participate in the 1st annual Celebration of Courage for the Aflac Cancer Center and Blood Disorders Service…

Keegan is a patient at Aflac Cancer Center in Atlanta. The Aflac Cancer Center is a leading pediatric hematology/oncology center that treats more than 325 new cancer patients each year and follows more than 2,000 patients with sickle cell disease, hemophilia and other blood disorders.

This year with the help of a dedicated group of community volunteers, those whose lives have been affected by these diseases have the chance to participate in Celebration of Courage: Taking Steps to Fight Childhood Cancer and Blood Disorders from 10 am to 2 pm Saturday, April 12, 2008 at Centennial Olympic Park. Celebration of Courage is a relay event during which participants will walk to raise funds and awareness for the Aflac Cancer Center. Keegan is signed up for the relay and will be one to carry the “torch of life” a short distance before passing it to the next participant. The relay will be followed with a fun-filled carnival for all participants and supporters.

Through this event, we are hoping to raise a total of $1,500 for the Aflac Cancer Center. The money raise at Celebration of Courage will enable the Aflac Cancer Center to purchase much-needed hematology analyzers, which run a complete blood count on every patient and are vital to patient care.

I hope you will consider supporting Keegan and the many other courageous children who are affected by these diseases. Any donation amount is appreciated and will help us reach our goal. Together, we can make a difference. You can get more information about the Celebration of Courage at www.choa.org/courage or email me at audramama@yahoo.com.
You can make a check payable to Children’s Healthcare of Atlanta Foundation and mail it to

Children’s Healthcare of Atlanta
1687 Tullie Circle NE
Atlanta, GA 30329

Please put “Celebration of Courage/Keegan Puckett” in the subject line.

This is probably the most important event we will ever take part in. Every participant will be a child that has been treated at Aflac at some point in time. I cannot even imagine the tears and strength I am going to witness on that day.

Oh and also, switch to Aflac insurance, look at this…http://www.aflac.com/us/en/aboutaflac/fightingpediatriccancer.aspx

Yep, our cancer center is named after an insurance company, and for a good reason.

I cannot even tell you how honored we feel to be able to raise money and give back to our “family” in this way. The last 2.5 years they have nurtured us so much and it would be great to be able to present them with this money for the machines. Please help us reach our goal.
Thank you everyone for praying for Keegan, please keep it up, He is listening.

Thank you so much!
Love and hugs,
Audra
GOD IS IN CONTROL!!!
GOD‘S GOT US!!!
“We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain, where Jesus, who went before us, has entered on our behalf.” Hebrews 6:19-20

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
1 Corinthians 13:4-7

“Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.”
Hebrews 11:1

“Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptable with reverence and awe, for our God is a consuming fire.”
Hebrews 12:28-29

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.”
James 1:2-3

“The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer, My God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation.”
2 Samuel 22:2-3

I AM…
By Keegan Puckett

I am Happy and cool
I wonder if i can play video games
I hear vouses and a truck
I see people and a phone
I want pizza and hot wings
I am Happy and cool

I pretend too Sleep and sneeac
I feel Skin and hats
I touch wals and windows
I worry I’ll break my leg agin
I cry when I hert my self
I am Happy and cool

I understand That drugs are bad
I say cool
I dream that I’m gana be a cop
I try to get rid of my canser
I hope that I don’t diye
I am Happy and cool

Friday, March 28, 2008 12:14 AM

WEEK 96 OUT OF 105

Eric the Warrior is having a very hard time right now and needs everyone to storm Heaven with prayers. Please stop by his website and leave a note of love to his family. His website is www.caringbridge.org/visit/ericmeraz Please pray for Eric’s complete healing.
“We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain, where Jesus, who went before us, has entered on our behalf.” Hebrews 6:19-20

Keegan is doing well right now. He is full swing into the oral chemo. I think he is fighting something off right now, but since he doesn’t have a fever, I will try not to worry myself too much. We are going to Camp Sunshine family camp this weekend and the kids are super excited about that. I would be, except that it exhausts me so much.

I had Keegan’s end of year IEP meeting with the school and he is doing ok. He is still having issues with math, reading and science, wait, that’s pretty much everything. I’m not too sure, I will have to look over the papers when I get them, but I think he might be having more issues now. I’m not scatter brained about it; I am in a bit of denial about it. I am going to ask his doctor when we can do the neuropsych testing again.

Keegan is going to be carrying the torch for the Relay for Life in Fayette County this year, and walking the survivor lap. His school raises funds every year for the American Cancer Society and last year raised 15,000 I believe. They have made Keegan their little mascot for the school. It has been so therapeutic for him and cool. He and a few of the staff designed a t-shirt that says “Keegan’s Kickers”. It’s very cool and Keegan feels like a little celebrity in school. The shirts are $10 I believe, and if you want one, let me know and I will figure out how you can get one or at least get you in touch with the lady who is in charge of all that.

Also, he will participate in the 1st annual Celebration of Courage for the Aflac Cancer Center and Blood Disorders Service…

Keegan is a patient at Aflac Cancer Center in Atlanta. The Aflac Cancer Center is a leading pediatric hematology/oncology center that treats more than 325 new cancer patients each year and follows more than 2,000 patients with sickle cell disease, hemophilia and other blood disorders.

This year with the help of a dedicated group of community volunteers, those whose lives have been affected by these diseases have the chance to participate in Celebration of Courage: Taking Steps to Fight Childhood Cancer and Blood Disorders from 10 am to 2 pm Saturday, April 12, 2008 at Centennial Olympic Park. Celebration of Courage is a relay event during which participants will walk to raise funds and awareness for the Aflac Cancer Center. Keegan is signed up for the relay and will be one to carry the “torch of life” a short distance before passing it to the next participant. The relay will be followed with a fun-filled carnival for all participants and supporters.

Through this event, we are hoping to raise a total of $1,500 for the Aflac Cancer Center. The money raise at Celebration of Courage will enable the Aflac Cancer Center to purchase much-needed hematology analyzers, which run a complete blood count on every patient and are vital to patient care.

I hope you will consider supporting Keegan and the many other courageous children who are affected by these diseases. Any donation amount is appreciated and will help us reach our goal. Together, we can make a difference. You can get more information about the Celebration of Courage at www.choa.org/courage or email me at audramama@yahoo.com.
You can make a check payable to Children’s Healthcare of Atlanta Foundation and mail it to

Children’s Healthcare of Atlanta
1687 Tullie Circle NE
Atlanta, GA 30329

Please put “Celebration of Courage/Keegan Puckett” in the subject line.

This is probably the most important event we will ever take part in. Every participant will be a child that has been treated at Aflac at some point in time. I cannot even imagine the tears and strength I am going to witness on that day.

Oh and also, switch to Aflac insurance, look at this…http://www.aflac.com/us/en/aboutaflac/fightingpediatriccancer.aspx

Yep, our cancer center is named after an insurance company, and for a good reason.

I cannot even tell you how honored we feel to be able to raise money and give back to our “family” in this way. The last 2.5 years they have nurtured us so much and it would be great to be able to present them with this money for the machines. Please help us reach our goal.
Thank you everyone for praying for Keegan, please keep it up, He is listening.

Thank you so much!
Love and hugs,
Audra
GOD IS IN CONTROL!!!
GOD‘S GOT US!!!
“We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain, where Jesus, who went before us, has entered on our behalf.” Hebrews 6:19-20

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
1 Corinthians 13:4-7

“Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.”
Hebrews 11:1

“Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptable with reverence and awe, for our God is a consuming fire.”
Hebrews 12:28-29

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.”
James 1:2-3

“The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer, My God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation.”
2 Samuel 22:2-3

I AM…
By Keegan Puckett

I am Happy and cool
I wonder if i can play video games
I hear vouses and a truck
I see people and a phone
I want pizza and hot wings
I am Happy and cool

I pretend too Sleep and sneeac
I feel Skin and hats
I touch wals and windows
I worry I’ll break my leg agin
I cry when I hert my self
I am Happy and cool

I understand That drugs are bad
I say cool
I dream that I’m gana be a cop
I try to get rid of my canser
I hope that I don’t diye
I am Happy and cool

Wednesday, March 19, 2008 12:23 PM

WE HAVE AN OFF TREATMENT DATE…
MAY 19, 2008

WEEK 95 OUT OF 105

COUNTS
Absolute Neutrophil Count (ANC): 2530
Hemoglobin (HGB): 11.7
Platelets: 356,000

It’s taken me two days to write about this because there is just so much emotion.

Keegan had his last spinal tap on Monday.

Sunday night I sobbed myself to sleep. I couldn’t help it. I kept thinking about the *first* spinal tap, they gave Keegan fentanyl to calm him down while they took him into the OR to place his port, do a spinal tap and bone marrow aspiration. We put him in his wagon and watched them pull him away, Keegan was so sweet, he turned back, smiled, waved, and said “I love you, bye”. We didn’t even know what kind of leukemia it was yet, we just knew that our son might die and they just took him down the hall away from us. Mike held me up again while I cried, and we waited. It only took a couple of hours and we were with him again. That was the longest couple of hours of my life.

And now we’re at the *last* spinal tap. I started feeling that fear tighten around my chest, sometimes knowledge is not your friend. The more I know about cancer, the more scared I am. We left the house at about 7 am; his appointment was at 8 am so we started off late which sucked. I probably was driving about 5 minutes when I started sobbing again in the car. Honestly, the last time I felt this emotional was when he relapsed, what a roller coaster we are on. Anyway, we had to wait 2 hours on Monday to get his spinal tap. Luckily one of our buddies, Lindsey was there so I got to talk with her mom while I was waiting. When they actually got him going and closed the door, I went in the other room and cried for a few minutes. Keegan did fine. I asked everyone to pray that Keegan’s spinal fluid be clear and it was, praise God! It’s nice to get the “first of the last” under our belt. I keep crying thinking about it. Crying with relief, fear, joy, lots of different emotions.

So Keegan’s NP, Terry gave me the off treatment date…May 19th. If all goes as planned, Keegan will take his last IV chemotherapy on that day. YEA!! Keegan also got IVIG and pentamidine this week, so we didn’t get home until late afternoon. And that was fine. We did take a celebratory side trip to EB games, Keegan has been wanting that Call of Duty game which I know is too old for him, but whatever, we can chalk that one up to another bad parent moment. I got it for him to thank him for going through so much.


I am looking forward to crying and celebrating all the “lasts” and “first” that will come over the next few months.


I fixed the countdown clock, but I think it will probably mess up again in the future, oh well…

Keegan is being admitted. He started getting a low grade fever this weekend and the shingles have gotten really bad. Here is a picture…


It’s actually worse now and getting more painful. There are hundreds of tiny blisters all over his ear, neck and head. It is also swollen and very red now. Every area that you see that looks clear is now covered in blisters. Poor kid. The doctors say that he will have to stay until most of them “crust” over. Eewww. Sounds gross. He wasn’t too happy when he heard that he was going to have to stay at the hospital, and even more unhappy when he found out that he cannot be on the Aflac Cancer unit. He is doing ok right now, playing with the PSP.

Keegan’s counts are very good and that is a great thing. His ANC is almost 3000. Hopefully it will stay up during this time. Right now we are in the ER waiting for a room. They are pretty packed, so I hope it doesn't take too long.

Also, the grandpa across the street passed away yesterday. The family is very sad and trying to figure out how they will pay to get him back to Cuba. They will not be able to afford to even give him a service here and most of them will not be able to go back to Cuba. Please pray for that family.

Thank you for your prayers.

Love,
Audra
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
1 Corinthians 13:4-7

The Goss family is doing a fundraiser for another one of our buddies, Drew. Both of them are on twww.carepages.org care page names, MadisonGoss and DrewKrunzynski. What a great cause and a wonderful way to help a wonderful family. Please stop by http://www.usfhockeytournament.com/ and check it out.

Don’t forget Cancer Warriors Child of the Month, Symone! You can make your monthly donation at http://www.cancerwarriors.org/Family_fundraiser.html. I haven’t had the pleasure of meeting Symone and her family yet, but I hope to next time we visit Scottish Rite. Those that have met her mother are so touched and moved by her, she is definitely full of God’s grace.

Please visit this website and pray for this precious little girl…www.caringbridge.org/visit/zaida. It is so upsetting that this keeps happening and that we have no idea how to fix it. We need a cure, we need it now. Keegan is going to light the torch for the Relay for Life this year, and I pray that this year they make some strides and get closer to a cure for cancer. Please continue to pray for Ethan also, he had a CT yesterday and they see something in his lungs still. Please keep praying for Krystle so that she can get her transplant soon.

COME ON DOWN, COME ON OVER, COME ON INTO THE LIGHTHOUSE!!!!!
We have applied for the Retreat 3 June 2-7, Monday-Saturday for those of you that either want to be on the same retreat as us or want to totally avoid us. Hehe.

The deadline for Session 1 (Spring and Summer) retreats is February 1st. If you would like to attend and haven’t yet applied, please be sure to get your application in by the end of the month. To apply, visit their website www.lighthousefamilyretreat.org .

I copy/pasted this from an email I got today…
“The Lighthouse mission is to serve children with cancer and their families at a seaside retreat and help them to laugh, restore family relationships and find hope in God. Our hope is that families return home from The Lighthouse and continue their journey with renewed strength, hope and love.
The Lighthouse holds ten retreats annually in rented or donated homes in the communities along the Florida panhandle. Twelve children with cancer and their families attend each retreat and are served by 30 volunteers who pamper, cook, clean, and take care of daily responsibilities so families can focus on having fun. The Lighthouse program offers family-centered activities like beach games, morning devotionals, parent group, a luau, talent show, and even a special night out for the parents.
The time has come to apply for the 2008 Retreat Season. To apply as a Retreat Family or a volunteer for Session 1, please visit our website at www.lighthousefamilyretreat.org . The deadline is approaching, February 1st , for retreats 1-6.
Retreat 1 April 7-12, Monday-Saturday*
Retreat 2 April 14-19, Monday-Saturday*
Retreat 3 June 2-7, Monday-Saturday*
Retreat 4 June 16-21, Monday-Saturday*
Retreat 5 June 30-July 5, Monday-Saturday*
Retreat 6 July 21-July 26, Monday-Saturday*
*volunteers arrive one day early
If you know of a family living through childhood cancer that may be interested in attending or someone who may be interested in volunteering, please forward this email on to them!

Hope to see you at The Lighthouse!”

Thank you so much!
Love and hugs,
Audra
GOD IS IN CONTROL!!!
GOD‘S GOT US!!!

Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.
Hebrews 11:1

Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptable with reverence and awe, for our “God is a consuming fire.”
Hebrews 12:28-29

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.
James 1:2-3

OUR STORE WITH ORIGINAL DESIGNS FOR T-SHIRTS AND BUMPER STICKERS


If you are using Agent Cool Blue for your kids, STOP! There has been a recall on every bottle since its launch. I guess there is a microorganism in it. Nice, thanks Listerine. You can read about it on their website…www.agentcoolblue.com.

URGENT PRAYERS

-Tyler M., possible osteosarcoma recurrence. Please pray that his next scans are clear and that his body is free of all cancer. PRAISE OUR LORD AND SAVIOR!!! NO RECURRENCE!!!!!

-Chayton, medulloblastoma recurrence. Chayton has had surgery and still needs constant prayers. www.caringbridge.org/visit/chaytonwilliamson

Tanner, NF. Tanner has relapsed and needs our prayers. PRAYERS BEING ANSWERED!!! Check it out…www.caringbridge.org/visit/tannerb

-Ben, 5 yr old with relapsed leukemia. www.caringbridge.org/ga/benjaminsmith

-Abby www.carepages.com – AbbySmith12. medulloblastoma recurrence.

-Krystle, 16 yr old with relapsed large b cell lymphoma. www.caringbridge.org/visit/krystle Please pray for remission!!!

-Ariel, 12 yr old with relapsed AML

-Ryan, neuroblastoma www.superryan.blogspot.com

-Jonathan from Denver. Recently relapsed with leukemia, he is having issues with his eyes and may not recover all of his eyesight. Please pray that his leukemia is healed along with his eyesight. www.caringbridge.org/co/Jonathan Harrison

-Samuel, cutie pie with Relapsed ALL. Samuel is on a new protocol that doesn‘t involve the harsh chemo drugs that hurt him so much in the past. Please pray for them to work and for Samuel to have complete healing.

-Our friend Ethan. Ethan’s cancer is back. They have removed the cancer from his lungs, he’s had open heart surgery and now we wait to see if he will have chemo and radiation.

-Baby Eric the Warrior is on a different chemo treatment to try to get the cancer to finally go away for good. PRAY PRAY PRAY!!! Pray to Our Heavenly Father that Eric’s tumor is NOT growing, but shrinking! Better yet, pray that is in not even there anymore!!! www.caringbridge.org/visit/ericmeraz Little Eric is testimony to the power of prayer!!!!!

-Tyler Copley is doing well right now. He had his leg amputated. We went to visit and he is in great spirits, looking forward to his future. His family has been walking on this path for such a long time, I wonder if they can even remember when it wasn’t this way. Please pray for healing and comfort. Tyler just graduated HS!!! Way to go Tyler!!!

-Drew;2 yr old boy with neuroblastoma, Drew has a Carepage. www.carepages.org, the page name is Drew Kruszynski. Little Drew has been going through some rough times and really needs our prayers.

-Baby Z-Jay Wilms Tumor. Z-Jay recently relapsed and is undergoing more harsh treatment including radiation. Please pray for him and his family. Pray for Z-Jay’s parents to have strength during this time.

****************************************************

Please continue to pray for Damien, Jake, Morgan, Big Mike, Cameron, Shane, Ashley, Darrell, Donovan, Catie, Khadeem, Josh, Inaya, Austin, James, Imani, Christine, and Ashley D’s families as the struggle through their grief. I am so sad that I have to keep adding names to this list.

Also, please pray for Jim and George’s girls.

We have friends to we would like to ask you to pray for that are still in treatment
Jonathan from Denver. Leukemia relapse www.caringbridge.org/co/Jonathan Harrison
Ethan, 5 yr old with Medulloblastoma www.carepages.org carepage name-EthanJones
Samuel, 5 yr old with Relapsed ALL, alternative cancer treatment with no chemotherapy www.samuelbackus.homestead.com/SamuelsUpdates
Princess Kristen, 4 yr old with ALL
Kristen 18 yr old www.carepages.org carepage name- kristensivertsen
Jake 5 yr old with relapsed leukemia www.caringbridge.org/visit/teamrivers
Ricky almost 2 yr old with rhabdomyasarcoma
Lilly 2 yr old with ALL
New James, ALL
Joseph, 17 yr old with AML
Eric, 2 yr old with A.T.R.T Tumor www.caringbridge.org/visit/ericmeraz
Maddie 2 yr old with rare liver cancer
Maya, 2 yr old with neuroblastoma - www.caringbridge.org/visit/mayagonzalez
“The Cuteness” AKA Asher
Little Will Leukemia
François-ALL Leukemia
Baby Pyper Infant ALL - www.caringbridge.org/visit/pyperaddisynsellers
Baby Z-Jay Wilms Tumor
Baby Karson
Drew;2 yr old boy with cancer, Drew has a Carepage. www.carepages.org, the page name is Drew Kruszynski. You will definitely have to copy/paste that one!
Ariel, 12 yr old with AML
Nicholas DeLuca www.caringbridge.org/visit/nicholasdeluca

There are so many more, I cannot even remember all of their names. It will be a rough road ahead, but with our prayers, everything will work out. If you ever want to be added to this list, please don’t hesitate to email me and ask…audramama@yahoo.com

All of these families need to be lifted up in prayer.

PLEASE PRAY FOR HEALING TO JESUS FOR OUR KIDS AND SAFE RETURN FOR OUR TROOPS, HE IS LISTENING, HE WILL ANSWER OUR PRAYERS!!!

Saturday, January 26, 2008 1:08 PM

Keegan was getting some spots on his neck this week. I noticed them on Tuesday after school. They looked like eczema or psorisis or something. Then on Wednesday, the spots started getting blisters on them and Keegan started complaining that they hurt really bad.

We went to the clinic. It’s shingles. Keegan is calling them, “Crapples”. So, Keegan is in isolation until they all crust over. It he runs a fever or if they get too painful to handle with codeine, then he will be admitted. For now he is on valtrex, hey it’s not just for herpes.

They are all over the right side of his head, neck and ears. Please pray that they stop getting worse, they heal quickly, and that we get through this little bump without complication. Shingles and chicken pox can be very bad for a person with lowered immune system.

Keegan is very upset that he is in isolation. He hasn’t been to school since Tuesday and now he has to miss a birthday party. He told me this morning it just isn’t fair.

Also, please pray for our other neighbors, last night the grandpa in the house had a very bad heart attack and he is not doing very well. He is from Cuba and the family has a small language barrier. Please pray that grandpa gets better and that they are able to communicate well with his medical team.

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
1 Corinthians 13:4-7

The Goss family is doing a fundraiser for another one of our buddies, Drew. Both of them are on twww.carepages.org care page names, MadisonGoss and DrewKrunzynski. What a great cause and a wonderful way to help a wonderful family. Please stop by http://www.usfhockeytournament.com/ and check it out.

Don’t forget Cancer Warriors Child of the Month, Symone! You can make your monthly donation at http://www.cancerwarriors.org/Family_fundraiser.html. I haven’t had the pleasure of meeting Symone and her family yet, but I hope to next time we visit Scottish Rite. Those that have met her mother are so touched and moved by her, she is definitely full of God’s grace.

Please visit this website and pray for this precious little girl…www.caringbridge.org/visit/zaida. It is so upsetting that this keeps happening and that we have no idea how to fix it. We need a cure, we need it now. Keegan is going to light the torch for the Relay for Life this year, and I pray that this year they make some strides and get closer to a cure for cancer. Please continue to pray for Ethan also, he had a CT yesterday and they see something in his lungs still. Please keep praying for Krystle so that she can get her transplant soon.

COME ON DOWN, COME ON OVER, COME ON INTO THE LIGHTHOUSE!!!!!
We have applied for the Retreat 3 June 2-7, Monday-Saturday for those of you that either want to be on the same retreat as us or want to totally avoid us. Hehe.

The deadline for Session 1 (Spring and Summer) retreats is February 1st. If you would like to attend and haven’t yet applied, please be sure to get your application in by the end of the month. To apply, visit their website www.lighthousefamilyretreat.org .

I copy/pasted this from an email I got today…
“The Lighthouse mission is to serve children with cancer and their families at a seaside retreat and help them to laugh, restore family relationships and find hope in God. Our hope is that families return home from The Lighthouse and continue their journey with renewed strength, hope and love.
The Lighthouse holds ten retreats annually in rented or donated homes in the communities along the Florida panhandle. Twelve children with cancer and their families attend each retreat and are served by 30 volunteers who pamper, cook, clean, and take care of daily responsibilities so families can focus on having fun. The Lighthouse program offers family-centered activities like beach games, morning devotionals, parent group, a luau, talent show, and even a special night out for the parents.
The time has come to apply for the 2008 Retreat Season. To apply as a Retreat Family or a volunteer for Session 1, please visit our website at www.lighthousefamilyretreat.org . The deadline is approaching, February 1st , for retreats 1-6.
Retreat 1 April 7-12, Monday-Saturday*
Retreat 2 April 14-19, Monday-Saturday*
Retreat 3 June 2-7, Monday-Saturday*
Retreat 4 June 16-21, Monday-Saturday*
Retreat 5 June 30-July 5, Monday-Saturday*
Retreat 6 July 21-July 26, Monday-Saturday*
*volunteers arrive one day early
If you know of a family living through childhood cancer that may be interested in attending or someone who may be interested in volunteering, please forward this email on to them!

Hope to see you at The Lighthouse!”

Thank you so much!
Love and hugs,
Audra
GOD IS IN CONTROL!!!
GOD‘S GOT US!!!

Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.
Hebrews 11:1

Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptable with reverence and awe, for our “God is a consuming fire.”
Hebrews 12:28-29

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.
James 1:2-3

OUR STORE WITH ORIGINAL DESIGNS FOR T-SHIRTS AND BUMPER STICKERS


If you are using Agent Cool Blue for your kids, STOP! There has been a recall on every bottle since its launch. I guess there is a microorganism in it. Nice, thanks Listerine. You can read about it on their website…www.agentcoolblue.com.

URGENT PRAYERS

-Tyler M., possible osteosarcoma recurrence. Please pray that his next scans are clear and that his body is free of all cancer. PRAISE OUR LORD AND SAVIOR!!! NO RECURRENCE!!!!!

-Chayton, medulloblastoma recurrence. Chayton has had surgery and still needs constant prayers. www.caringbridge.org/visit/chaytonwilliamson

Tanner, NF. Tanner has relapsed and needs our prayers. PRAYERS BEING ANSWERED!!! Check it out…www.caringbridge.org/visit/tannerb

-Ben, 5 yr old with relapsed leukemia. www.caringbridge.org/ga/benjaminsmith

-Abby www.carepages.com – AbbySmith12. medulloblastoma recurrence.

-Krystle, 16 yr old with relapsed large b cell lymphoma. www.caringbridge.org/visit/krystle Please pray for remission!!!

-Ariel, 12 yr old with relapsed AML

-Ryan, neuroblastoma www.superryan.blogspot.com

-Jonathan from Denver. Recently relapsed with leukemia, he is having issues with his eyes and may not recover all of his eyesight. Please pray that his leukemia is healed along with his eyesight. www.caringbridge.org/co/Jonathan Harrison

-Samuel, cutie pie with Relapsed ALL. Samuel is on a new protocol that doesn‘t involve the harsh chemo drugs that hurt him so much in the past. Please pray for them to work and for Samuel to have complete healing.

-Our friend Ethan. Ethan’s cancer is back. They have removed the cancer from his lungs, he’s had open heart surgery and now we wait to see if he will have chemo and radiation.

-Baby Eric the Warrior is on a different chemo treatment to try to get the cancer to finally go away for good. PRAY PRAY PRAY!!! Pray to Our Heavenly Father that Eric’s tumor is NOT growing, but shrinking! Better yet, pray that is in not even there anymore!!! www.caringbridge.org/visit/ericmeraz Little Eric is testimony to the power of prayer!!!!!

-Tyler Copley is doing well right now. He had his leg amputated. We went to visit and he is in great spirits, looking forward to his future. His family has been walking on this path for such a long time, I wonder if they can even remember when it wasn’t this way. Please pray for healing and comfort. Tyler just graduated HS!!! Way to go Tyler!!!

-Drew;2 yr old boy with neuroblastoma, Drew has a Carepage. www.carepages.org, the page name is Drew Kruszynski. Little Drew has been going through some rough times and really needs our prayers.

-Baby Z-Jay Wilms Tumor. Z-Jay recently relapsed and is undergoing more harsh treatment including radiation. Please pray for him and his family. Pray for Z-Jay’s parents to have strength during this time.

****************************************************

Please continue to pray for Damien, Jake, Morgan, Big Mike, Cameron, Shane, Ashley, Darrell, Donovan, Catie, Khadeem, Josh, Inaya, Austin, James, Imani, Christine, and Ashley D’s families as the struggle through their grief. I am so sad that I have to keep adding names to this list.

Also, please pray for Jim and George’s girls.

We have friends to we would like to ask you to pray for that are still in treatment
Jonathan from Denver. Leukemia relapse www.caringbridge.org/co/Jonathan Harrison
Ethan, 5 yr old with Medulloblastoma www.carepages.org carepage name-EthanJones
Samuel, 5 yr old with Relapsed ALL, alternative cancer treatment with no chemotherapy www.samuelbackus.homestead.com/SamuelsUpdates
Princess Kristen, 4 yr old with ALL
Kristen 18 yr old www.carepages.org carepage name- kristensivertsen
Jake 5 yr old with relapsed leukemia www.caringbridge.org/visit/teamrivers
Ricky almost 2 yr old with rhabdomyasarcoma
Lilly 2 yr old with ALL
New James, ALL
Joseph, 17 yr old with AML
Eric, 2 yr old with A.T.R.T Tumor www.caringbridge.org/visit/ericmeraz
Maddie 2 yr old with rare liver cancer
Maya, 2 yr old with neuroblastoma - www.caringbridge.org/visit/mayagonzalez
“The Cuteness” AKA Asher
Little Will Leukemia
François-ALL Leukemia
Baby Pyper Infant ALL - www.caringbridge.org/visit/pyperaddisynsellers
Baby Z-Jay Wilms Tumor
Baby Karson
Drew;2 yr old boy with cancer, Drew has a Carepage. www.carepages.org, the page name is Drew Kruszynski. You will definitely have to copy/paste that one!
Ariel, 12 yr old with AML
Nicholas DeLuca www.caringbridge.org/visit/nicholasdeluca

There are so many more, I cannot even remember all of their names. It will be a rough road ahead, but with our prayers, everything will work out. If you ever want to be added to this list, please don’t hesitate to email me and ask…audramama@yahoo.com

All of these families need to be lifted up in prayer.

PLEASE PRAY FOR HEALING TO JESUS FOR OUR KIDS AND SAFE RETURN FOR OUR TROOPS, HE IS LISTENING, HE WILL ANSWER OUR PRAYERS!!!

Thursday, January 24, 2008 1:01 AM

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
1 Corinthians 13:4-7

I’m sitting here on my computer trying to do 7 or 8 things at a time. I am totally exhausted, didn’t get much sleep last night and it looks like I won't get much tonight. Stupid insomnia. I’ve had a lot on my mind lately. Two years ago I was doing all sorts of planning, and getting ready with great excitement to go off treatment. I am really having a hard time getting into it this time. I know it seems silly, and maybe everyone is sick of hearing about it…(you think your sick of hearing about me being a nervous worrywart? Try dealing with this crap-fest for five years). Keegan is doing great, he looks great, things are going good. He still has pain that no 8 yr old should have, but it’s way less than some other kids have, so we will try not to complain too much about it. I suppose I am still so freaked out because he looked fine before and seemed fine. Maybe the problem is just that we are in that “crapaversary” time. It does make me a bit emotional.

There are a lot of mixed emotions with this. I know I should be just so grateful, and I am, I really am. I am also still scared. I don’t even know how to explain it. I know I am trying to find a way to deal with it, which is why I am always trying to get everyone to donate to all the different causes. I guess I am trying to make a difference, as small as it is.

In the last four and a half years I have seen so much, pain, suffering, bravery, hope, love, despair. The list goes on and on. I have been observing how other people (mostly other moms) deal with this whole situation and it truly amazes me how different we all are. Everyone manages to “deal” in their own way, and usually they find new and better ways of “dealing” as they go along.

Sometimes when families get out of this, they drop out of site, never to be seen in the cancer world again. It is such a painful experience for their family, that they cannot handle the constant reminder that is the little bald head. And honestly, who can blame them? This is like a war, are kids are fighting side by side and no one knows who gets out alive. I absolutely hate that. And the weird survivor guilt, it is hard to find a way to communicate again with people you love who started down the same path with you, cried with you laughed with you, watched over your child when you couldn’t be there, and then their child’s life got cut short.

There are some people that get out and take a subtle approach. I have a friend up at the hospital whose son I love to mess with cause he’s a teen, I love teasing teens, it’s a sickness. Anyway, this friend, we’ll call her “Nary” to protect her privacy. Narys son, Kichael had cancer when he was just a little boy, it went pretty much as planned, 3.2 years chemo treatment lots of spinal taps with NO sedation and a few bumps along the road. The point is that they actually went off treatment when he was between 5 and 8, I can’t be expected to remember everything. And he did fine. Nary quilts and she doesn’t just start a quilt and finish it 5 years later (reference my crochet blanket from hell), she makes child size quilts for Aflac Cancer Center to give to newly diagnosed cancer patients. She’s been doing this forever! And the reason why I know Nary and Kichael is because Kichael is back, he is a teen now, it’s been over 5 years (I think) and he is back with a relapse. His happened close to when Keegan’s happened. I don’t think Nary would have told me about the reason she was making quilts whenever I saw her in the family room when we were inpatient if I wouldn’t have asked her what she does with all those beautiful quilts. What a beautiful thing to do.

Then there are people who jump in there and take it all on and create wonderful organizations from the pain in their hearts. There is “Tristy” (still changing names, but for fun now.) she runs Cancer Warriors. Her daughter, Pashley was born with rhabdomyasarcoma, very rare to be born with that. She is now a 5 year survivor. And every day Christy working on her Angel network. Trying to recruit new people. Now adding fundraisers that directly help cancer families in need. They have raised over $7,500.00 for 7 families. “Tristy” and her husband, “Bavid” were able to help these families Pay a lot of bills they otherwise would not have the time or financial resources to pay. You all have heard me talking about what a financial toll this all is. On top of all that, they do amazing things at Christmas. I don’t know how many families they were able to give a full stock of Christmas presents, but it was A LOT! Truly amazing.

Then you’ve got those out there you have no idea why they would subject themselves to so much pain and suffering, willingly when they never experienced it first hand them selves. Those people are incredible to me. They do whatever they can to make sure that once a week there is food up at the hospital, bringing a hug to a mom or a smile to a sick kid. Maybe a small gift. I have a friend, “Megina” she came up to the hospital on almost every visit with a wagon loaded up with every comfort food we needed. And I couldn’t tell her no, she just did it. She also showed up one time with a bunch of parking garage tickets for me. Her daughter, “Wadie Pice” also had the same cancer Keegan has, she is cancer free for 2 years and going strong.

I know I have family and friends out there like “Nary” who are doing things without anyone knowing. They don’t like the spotlight… Pom? Nangie? Pachell? Lelli? Cargaret? Perica? DaLonna? Oh I know there are many more.

I am doing what I can. You are doing what you can. We all are making a difference no matter how big or small. And it is all powered by our mighty and awesome God.

Aflac Cancer Center is doing a relay for the clinic in April, I think. I need to find a sponser for Keegan, or many sponsers. We will need to raise $1200 I think. I will post more on another day because I am super tired right now, I am so tired I didn’t run spell check.

The Goss family is doing a fundraiser for another one of our buddies, Drew. Both of them are on twww.carepages.org care page names, MadisonGoss and DrewKrunzynski. What a great cause and a wonderful way to help a wonderful family. Please stop by http://www.usfhockeytournament.com/ and check it out.

Don’t forget Cancer Warriors Child of the Month, Symone! You can make your monthly donation at http://www.cancerwarriors.org/Family_fundraiser.html. I haven’t had the pleasure of meeting Symone and her family yet, but I hope to next time we visit Scottish Rite. Those that have met her mother are so touched and moved by her, she is definitely full of God’s grace.

Please visit this website and pray for this precious little girl…www.caringbridge.org/visit/zaida. It is so upsetting that this keeps happening and that we have no idea how to fix it. We need a cure, we need it now. Keegan is going to light the torch for the Relay for Life this year, and I pray that this year they make some strides and get closer to a cure for cancer. Please continue to pray for Ethan also, he had a CT yesterday and they see something in his lungs still. Please keep praying for Krystle so that she can get her transplant soon.

COME ON DOWN, COME ON OVER, COME ON INTO THE LIGHTHOUSE!!!!!
We have applied for the Retreat 3 June 2-7, Monday-Saturday for those of you that either want to be on the same retreat as us or want to totally avoid us. Hehe.

The deadline for Session 1 (Spring and Summer) retreats is February 1st. If you would like to attend and haven’t yet applied, please be sure to get your application in by the end of the month. To apply, visit their website www.lighthousefamilyretreat.org .

I copy/pasted this from an email I got today…
“The Lighthouse mission is to serve children with cancer and their families at a seaside retreat and help them to laugh, restore family relationships and find hope in God. Our hope is that families return home from The Lighthouse and continue their journey with renewed strength, hope and love.
The Lighthouse holds ten retreats annually in rented or donated homes in the communities along the Florida panhandle. Twelve children with cancer and their families attend each retreat and are served by 30 volunteers who pamper, cook, clean, and take care of daily responsibilities so families can focus on having fun. The Lighthouse program offers family-centered activities like beach games, morning devotionals, parent group, a luau, talent show, and even a special night out for the parents.
The time has come to apply for the 2008 Retreat Season. To apply as a Retreat Family or a volunteer for Session 1, please visit our website at www.lighthousefamilyretreat.org . The deadline is approaching, February 1st , for retreats 1-6.
Retreat 1 April 7-12, Monday-Saturday*
Retreat 2 April 14-19, Monday-Saturday*
Retreat 3 June 2-7, Monday-Saturday*
Retreat 4 June 16-21, Monday-Saturday*
Retreat 5 June 30-July 5, Monday-Saturday*
Retreat 6 July 21-July 26, Monday-Saturday*
*volunteers arrive one day early
If you know of a family living through childhood cancer that may be interested in attending or someone who may be interested in volunteering, please forward this email on to them!

Hope to see you at The Lighthouse!”

Thank you so much!
Love and hugs,
Audra
GOD IS IN CONTROL!!!
GOD‘S GOT US!!!

Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.
Hebrews 11:1

Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptable with reverence and awe, for our “God is a consuming fire.”
Hebrews 12:28-29

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.
James 1:2-3

OUR STORE WITH ORIGINAL DESIGNS FOR T-SHIRTS AND BUMPER STICKERS


If you are using Agent Cool Blue for your kids, STOP! There has been a recall on every bottle since its launch. I guess there is a microorganism in it. Nice, thanks Listerine. You can read about it on their website…www.agentcoolblue.com.

URGENT PRAYERS

-Tyler M., possible osteosarcoma recurrence. Please pray that his next scans are clear and that his body is free of all cancer. PRAISE OUR LORD AND SAVIOR!!! NO RECURRENCE!!!!!

-Chayton, medulloblastoma recurrence. Chayton has had surgery and still needs constant prayers. www.caringbridge.org/visit/chaytonwilliamson

Tanner, NF. Tanner has relapsed and needs our prayers. PRAYERS BEING ANSWERED!!! Check it out…www.caringbridge.org/visit/tannerb

-Ben, 5 yr old with relapsed leukemia. www.caringbridge.org/ga/benjaminsmith

-Abby www.carepages.com – AbbySmith12. medulloblastoma recurrence.

-Krystle, 16 yr old with relapsed large b cell lymphoma. www.caringbridge.org/visit/krystle Please pray for remission!!!

-Ariel, 12 yr old with relapsed AML

-Ryan, neuroblastoma www.superryan.blogspot.com

-Jonathan from Denver. Recently relapsed with leukemia, he is having issues with his eyes and may not recover all of his eyesight. Please pray that his leukemia is healed along with his eyesight. www.caringbridge.org/co/Jonathan Harrison

-Samuel, cutie pie with Relapsed ALL. Samuel is on a new protocol that doesn‘t involve the harsh chemo drugs that hurt him so much in the past. Please pray for them to work and for Samuel to have complete healing.

-Our friend Ethan. Ethan’s cancer is back. They have removed the cancer from his lungs, he’s had open heart surgery and now we wait to see if he will have chemo and radiation.

-Baby Eric the Warrior is on a different chemo treatment to try to get the cancer to finally go away for good. PRAY PRAY PRAY!!! Pray to Our Heavenly Father that Eric’s tumor is NOT growing, but shrinking! Better yet, pray that is in not even there anymore!!! www.caringbridge.org/visit/ericmeraz Little Eric is testimony to the power of prayer!!!!!

-Tyler Copley is doing well right now. He had his leg amputated. We went to visit and he is in great spirits, looking forward to his future. His family has been walking on this path for such a long time, I wonder if they can even remember when it wasn’t this way. Please pray for healing and comfort. Tyler just graduated HS!!! Way to go Tyler!!!

-Drew;2 yr old boy with neuroblastoma, Drew has a Carepage. www.carepages.org, the page name is Drew Kruszynski. Little Drew has been going through some rough times and really needs our prayers.

-Baby Z-Jay Wilms Tumor. Z-Jay recently relapsed and is undergoing more harsh treatment including radiation. Please pray for him and his family. Pray for Z-Jay’s parents to have strength during this time.

****************************************************

Please continue to pray for Damien, Jake, Morgan, Big Mike, Cameron, Shane, Ashley, Darrell, Donovan, Catie, Khadeem, Josh, Inaya, Austin, James, Imani, Christine, and Ashley D’s families as the struggle through their grief. I am so sad that I have to keep adding names to this list.

Also, please pray for Jim and George’s girls.

We have friends to we would like to ask you to pray for that are still in treatment
Jonathan from Denver. Leukemia relapse www.caringbridge.org/co/Jonathan Harrison
Ethan, 5 yr old with Medulloblastoma www.carepages.org carepage name-EthanJones
Samuel, 5 yr old with Relapsed ALL, alternative cancer treatment with no chemotherapy www.samuelbackus.homestead.com/SamuelsUpdates
Princess Kristen, 4 yr old with ALL
Kristen 18 yr old www.carepages.org carepage name- kristensivertsen
Jake 5 yr old with relapsed leukemia www.caringbridge.org/visit/teamrivers
Ricky almost 2 yr old with rhabdomyasarcoma
Lilly 2 yr old with ALL
New James, ALL
Joseph, 17 yr old with AML
Eric, 2 yr old with A.T.R.T Tumor www.caringbridge.org/visit/ericmeraz
Maddie 2 yr old with rare liver cancer
Maya, 2 yr old with neuroblastoma - www.caringbridge.org/visit/mayagonzalez
“The Cuteness” AKA Asher
Little Will Leukemia
François-ALL Leukemia
Baby Pyper Infant ALL - www.caringbridge.org/visit/pyperaddisynsellers
Baby Z-Jay Wilms Tumor
Baby Karson
Drew;2 yr old boy with cancer, Drew has a Carepage. www.carepages.org, the page name is Drew Kruszynski. You will definitely have to copy/paste that one!
Ariel, 12 yr old with AML
Nicholas DeLuca www.caringbridge.org/visit/nicholasdeluca

There are so many more, I cannot even remember all of their names. It will be a rough road ahead, but with our prayers, everything will work out. If you ever want to be added to this list, please don’t hesitate to email me and ask…audramama@yahoo.com

All of these families need to be lifted up in prayer.

PLEASE PRAY FOR HEALING TO JESUS FOR OUR KIDS AND SAFE RETURN FOR OUR TROOPS, HE IS LISTENING, HE WILL ANSWER OUR PRAYERS!!!

Wednesday, January 16, 2008 10:53 PM CST

WEEK 86 OF 105

NINETEEN WEEKS LEFT
I totally love this countdown stuff!

Counts
Absolute Neutrophil Count (ANC): 1700
Hemoglobin (HGB): 12.5
Platelets: 341,000

Keegan’s counts are climbing steadily and that is a very good thing. He is still on only like 75 percent chemo, but last week one of his doctors said that it would be that way probably until he finishes. And that is ok, he said that it was ok and I am going with that.

Yesterday Keegan had a clinic appointment to get IVIG and pentamidine. It was super exciting, let me tell you. I hate when we go to clinic and no one we know is there. Lately we have gone on Mondays and that’s when everyone we know goes. Hopefully we will be back on track next time. I think his next appointment is in two weeks.

Our friend Tyler M had a clinic appointment today to get scans, just before Christmas the doctors thought they saw cancer growing in his lungs again. Praise God they were wrong!!!! Very exciting news!!!!

The Goss family is doing a fundraiser for another one of our buddies, Drew. Both of them are on www.carepages.org care page names, MadisonGoss and DrewKrunzynski. What a great cause and a wonderful way to help a wonderful family. Please stop by http://www.usfhockeytournament.com/ and check it out.

Don’t forget Cancer Warriors Child of the Month, Symone! You can make your monthly donation at http://www.cancerwarriors.org/Family_fundraiser.html. I haven’t had the pleasure of meeting Symone and her family yet, but I hope to next time we visit Scottish Rite. Those that have met her mother are so touched and moved by her, she is definitely full of God’s grace.

Please visit this website and pray for this precious little girl…www.caringbridge.org/visit/zaida. It is so upsetting that this keeps happening and that we have no idea how to fix it. We need a cure, we need it now. Keegan is going to light the torch for the Relay for Life this year, and I pray that this year they make some strides and get closer to a cure for cancer. Please continue to pray for Ethan also, he had a CT yesterday and they see something in his lungs still. Please keep praying for Krystle so that she can get her transplant soon. Also please pray for our Lighthouse friend Tyler as they found some suspicious stuff in his lungs also.

COME ON DOWN, COME ON OVER, COME ON INTO THE LIGHTHOUSE!!!!!
We have applied for the Retreat 3 June 2-7, Monday-Saturday for those of you that either want to be on the same retreat as us or want to totally avoid us. Hehe.

The deadline for Session 1 (Spring and Summer) retreats is February 1st. If you would like to attend and haven’t yet applied, please be sure to get your application in by the end of the month. To apply, visit their website www.lighthousefamilyretreat.org .

I copy/pasted this from an email I got today…
“The Lighthouse mission is to serve children with cancer and their families at a seaside retreat and help them to laugh, restore family relationships and find hope in God. Our hope is that families return home from The Lighthouse and continue their journey with renewed strength, hope and love.
The Lighthouse holds ten retreats annually in rented or donated homes in the communities along the Florida panhandle. Twelve children with cancer and their families attend each retreat and are served by 30 volunteers who pamper, cook, clean, and take care of daily responsibilities so families can focus on having fun. The Lighthouse program offers family-centered activities like beach games, morning devotionals, parent group, a luau, talent show, and even a special night out for the parents.
The time has come to apply for the 2008 Retreat Season. To apply as a Retreat Family or a volunteer for Session 1, please visit our website at www.lighthousefamilyretreat.org . The deadline is approaching, February 1st , for retreats 1-6.
Retreat 1 April 7-12, Monday-Saturday*
Retreat 2 April 14-19, Monday-Saturday*
Retreat 3 June 2-7, Monday-Saturday*
Retreat 4 June 16-21, Monday-Saturday*
Retreat 5 June 30-July 5, Monday-Saturday*
Retreat 6 July 21-July 26, Monday-Saturday*
*volunteers arrive one day early
If you know of a family living through childhood cancer that may be interested in attending or someone who may be interested in volunteering, please forward this email on to them!

Hope to see you at The Lighthouse!”

Thank you so much!
Love and hugs,
Audra
GOD IS IN CONTROL!!!
GOD‘S GOT US!!!

Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.
Hebrews 11:1

Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptable with reverence and awe, for our “God is a consuming fire.”
Hebrews 12:28-29

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.
James 1:2-3

OUR STORE WITH ORIGINAL DESIGNS FOR T-SHIRTS AND BUMPER STICKERS


If you are using Agent Cool Blue for your kids, STOP! There has been a recall on every bottle since its launch. I guess there is a microorganism in it. Nice, thanks Listerine. You can read about it on their website…www.agentcoolblue.com.

URGENT PRAYERS

-Tyler M., possible osteosarcoma recurrence. Please pray that his next scans are clear and that his body is free of all cancer.

-Chayton, medulloblastoma recurrence. Chayton has had surgery and still needs constant prayers. www.caringbridge.org/visit/chaytonwilliamson

Tanner, NF. Tanner has relapsed and needs our prayers. PRAYERS BEING ANSWERED!!! Check it out…www.caringbridge.org/visit/tannerb

-Ben, 5 yr old with relapsed leukemia. www.caringbridge.org/ga/benjaminsmith

-Abby www.carepages.com – AbbySmith12. medulloblastoma recurrence.

-Krystle, 16 yr old with relapsed large b cell lymphoma. www.caringbridge.org/visit/krystle Please pray for remission!!!

-Ariel, 12 yr old with relapsed AML

-Ryan, neuroblastoma www.superryan.blogspot.com

-Jonathan from Denver. Recently relapsed with leukemia, he is having issues with his eyes and may not recover all of his eyesight. Please pray that his leukemia is healed along with his eyesight. www.caringbridge.org/co/Jonathan Harrison

-Samuel, cutie pie with Relapsed ALL. Samuel is on a new protocol that doesn‘t involve the harsh chemo drugs that hurt him so much in the past. Please pray for them to work and for Samuel to have complete healing.

-Our friend Ethan. Ethan’s cancer is back. They have removed the cancer from his lungs, he’s had open heart surgery and now we wait to see if he will have chemo and radiation.

-Baby Eric the Warrior is on a different chemo treatment to try to get the cancer to finally go away for good. PRAY PRAY PRAY!!! Pray to Our Heavenly Father that Eric’s tumor is NOT growing, but shrinking! Better yet, pray that is in not even there anymore!!! www.caringbridge.org/visit/ericmeraz Little Eric is testimony to the power of prayer!!!!!

-Tyler Copley is doing well right now. He had his leg amputated. We went to visit and he is in great spirits, looking forward to his future. His family has been walking on this path for such a long time, I wonder if they can even remember when it wasn’t this way. Please pray for healing and comfort. Tyler just graduated HS!!! Way to go Tyler!!!

-Drew;2 yr old boy with neuroblastoma, Drew has a Carepage. www.carepages.org, the page name is Drew Kruszynski. Little Drew has been going through some rough times and really needs our prayers.

-Baby Z-Jay Wilms Tumor. Z-Jay recently relapsed and is undergoing more harsh treatment including radiation. Please pray for him and his family. Pray for Z-Jay’s parents to have strength during this time.

****************************************************

Please continue to pray for Damien, Jake, Morgan, Big Mike, Cameron, Shane, Ashley, Darrell, Donovan, Catie, Khadeem, Josh, Inaya, Austin, James, Imani, Christine, and Ashley D’s families as the struggle through their grief. I am so sad that I have to keep adding names to this list.

Also, please pray for Jim and George’s girls.

We have friends to we would like to ask you to pray for that are still in treatment
Jonathan from Denver. Leukemia relapse www.caringbridge.org/co/Jonathan Harrison
Ethan, 5 yr old with Medulloblastoma www.carepages.org carepage name-EthanJones
Samuel, 5 yr old with Relapsed ALL, alternative cancer treatment with no chemotherapy www.samuelbackus.homestead.com/SamuelsUpdates
Princess Kristen, 4 yr old with ALL
Kristen 18 yr old www.carepages.org carepage name- kristensivertsen
Jake 5 yr old with relapsed leukemia www.caringbridge.org/visit/teamrivers
Ricky almost 2 yr old with rhabdomyasarcoma
Lilly 2 yr old with ALL
New James, ALL
Joseph, 17 yr old with AML
Eric, 2 yr old with A.T.R.T Tumor www.caringbridge.org/visit/ericmeraz
Maddie 2 yr old with rare liver cancer
Maya, 2 yr old with neuroblastoma - www.caringbridge.org/visit/mayagonzalez
“The Cuteness” AKA Asher
Little Will Leukemia
François-ALL Leukemia
Baby Pyper Infant ALL - www.caringbridge.org/visit/pyperaddisynsellers
Baby Z-Jay Wilms Tumor
Baby Karson
Drew;2 yr old boy with cancer, Drew has a Carepage. www.carepages.org, the page name is Drew Kruszynski. You will definitely have to copy/paste that one!
Ariel, 12 yr old with AML
Nicholas DeLuca www.caringbridge.org/visit/nicholasdeluca

There are so many more, I cannot even remember all of their names. It will be a rough road ahead, but with our prayers, everything will work out. If you ever want to be added to this list, please don’t hesitate to email me and ask…audramama@yahoo.com

All of these families need to be lifted up in prayer.

PLEASE PRAY FOR HEALING TO JESUS FOR OUR KIDS AND SAFE RETURN FOR OUR TROOPS, HE IS LISTENING, HE WILL ANSWER OUR PRAYERS!!!

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Tuesday, January 8, 2008 10:26 PM

WEEK 85 OF 105

Counts
Absolute Neutrophil Count (ANC): 960
Hemoglobin (HGB): 10.4
Platelets: 360,000

Keegan had a spinal tap this week and started the SECOND TO THE LAST 10 week rotation!!!!

WE ONLY HAVE TWENTY WEEKS LEFT!!! DID YOU HEAR THAT?? ONLY TWENTY WEEKS LEFT!!!

WAAHOOOO!!!!!

I know that twenty weeks may seem long to everyone else, so here is my perspective for you…

Keegan was diagnosed May 9, 2003. When we are all done with this, it will be a total of ˝ a decade, or 5 years, or 60 months, or 263 weeks, or 1860 days.

Wow, that is a lot of time in the small scheme of things, not so much time in the big picture. Let’s say Keegan lives to be 100 years old. Spending 5 years fighting cancer out of 100 is not so bad.

I got a little emotional when the doctor said that there is only 20 weeks left, but that’s understandable isn’t it? January is a scary month for us because of the relapse. Then on the way home, I cried about it. Every time I think about being done with this, I start crying, it really is overwhelming and hard to explain.

Anyway, the spinal tap went well, we met another kid, his name is Chandler. He is a piece of work. Funny, funny boy. I got to corrupt Chandler a little bit by showing him where the treasure box is, that was fun. Also, we got to visit with our favorite best friend ever, Krystle. Krystle teased Keegan by calling him Keeganna. Love that kid. We also saw Tyler Copley, but he didn’t see us, he was sleeping.

We had a pretty eventful weekend. We went to little Lauren’s house for her B-day party on Saturday, visited with our other friends Brian, Gina and their 3 boys, then on Sunday we celebrated Liam’s 7th birthday! It was a lot of fun and also the first big birthday party that Liam has ever had and the first big birthday party we have done since the relapse.

I have to tell you two funny things…I had to call Keegan’s nurse, Kim today and leave her a message that we are out of anti-nausea meds. She called back and said, “Yea, anti-nausea is like toilet paper, you do NOT want to run out of that.” HA! That cracked me up.

Then the school nurse called to let me know that Keegan is out of bottled water because right before Christmas break, he came in the clinic with a SHOPPING CART, loaded it up and took it back to his class room. My dad and I got a kick out of that, we just kept picturing Keegan as like the “Don” of the school coming into the nurse’s office to get his water. Ahhh, well, maybe you had to be there.

Ok, two more things and then I HAVE to go to bed…

1. Please visit this website and pray for this precious little girl…www.caringbridge.org/visit/zaida. It is so upsetting that this keeps happening and that we have no idea how to fix it. We need a cure, we need it now. Keegan is going to light the torch for the Relay for Life this year, and I pray that this year they make some strides and get closer to a cure for cancer. Please continue to pray for Ethan also, he had a CT yesterday and they see something in his lungs still. Please keep praying for Krystle so that she can get her transplant soon. Also please pray for our Lighthouse friend Tyler as they found some suspicious stuff in his lungs also.

2. COME ON DOWN, COME ON OVER, COME ON INTO THE LIGHTHOUSE!!!!!
We have applied for the Retreat 3 June 2-7, Monday-Saturday* for those of you that either want to be on the same retreat as us or want to totally avoid us. Hehe.

The deadline for Session 1 (Spring and Summer) retreats is February 1st. If you would like to attend and haven’t yet applied, please be sure to get your application in by the end of the month. To apply, visit their website www.lighthousefamilyretreat.org .

I copy/pasted this from an email I got today…
“The Lighthouse mission is to serve children with cancer and their families at a seaside retreat and help them to laugh, restore family relationships and find hope in God. Our hope is that families return home from The Lighthouse and continue their journey with renewed strength, hope and love.

The Lighthouse holds ten retreats annually in rented or donated homes in the communities along the Florida panhandle. Twelve children with cancer and their families attend each retreat and are served by 30 volunteers who pamper, cook, clean, and take care of daily responsibilities so families can focus on having fun. The Lighthouse program offers family-centered activities like beach games, morning devotionals, parent group, a luau, talent show, and even a special night out for the parents.

The time has come to apply for the 2008 Retreat Season. To apply as a Retreat Family or a volunteer for Session 1, please visit our website at www.lighthousefamilyretreat.org . The deadline is approaching, February 1st , for retreats 1-6.
Retreat 1 April 7-12, Monday-Saturday*
Retreat 2 April 14-19, Monday-Saturday*
Retreat 3 June 2-7, Monday-Saturday*
Retreat 4 June 16-21, Monday-Saturday*
Retreat 5 June 30-July 5, Monday-Saturday*
Retreat 6 July 21-July 26, Monday-Saturday*
*volunteers arrive one day early

If you know of a family living through childhood cancer that may be interested in attending or someone who may be interested in volunteering, please forward this email on to them!

Hope to see you at The Lighthouse!”

3. Ok, I lied, three things… We have our new child of the month at Cancer Warriors! She is so sweet and cute! Symone is going through some very tough challenges and needs our financial help. Please go to http://www.cancerwarriors.org/Family_fundraiser.html and make your monthly donation.

Thank you so much!
Love and hugs,
Audra
GOD IS IN CONTROL!!!
GOD‘S GOT US!!!

Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.
Hebrews 11:1

Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptable with reverence and awe, for our “God is a consuming fire.”
Hebrews 12:28-29

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.
James 1:2-3

OUR STORE WITH ORIGINAL DESIGNS FOR T-SHIRTS AND BUMPER STICKERS


If you are using Agent Cool Blue for your kids, STOP! There has been a recall on every bottle since its launch. I guess there is a microorganism in it. Nice, thanks Listerine. You can read about it on their website…www.agentcoolblue.com.

URGENT PRAYERS

-Tyler M., possible osteosarcoma recurrence. Please pray that his next scans are clear and that his body is free of all cancer.

-Chayton, medulloblastoma recurrence. Chayton has had surgery and still needs constant prayers. www.caringbridge.org/visit/chaytonwilliamson

Tanner, NF. Tanner has relapsed and needs our prayers. PRAYERS BEING ANSWERED!!! Check it out…www.caringbridge.org/visit/tannerb

-Ben, 5 yr old with relapsed leukemia. www.caringbridge.org/ga/benjaminsmith

-Abby www.carepages.com – AbbySmith12. medulloblastoma recurrence.

-Krystle, 16 yr old with relapsed large b cell lymphoma. www.caringbridge.org/visit/krystle Please pray for remission!!!

-Ariel, 12 yr old with relapsed AML

-Ryan, neuroblastoma www.superryan.blogspot.com

-Jonathan from Denver. Recently relapsed with leukemia, he is having issues with his eyes and may not recover all of his eyesight. Please pray that his leukemia is healed along with his eyesight. www.caringbridge.org/co/Jonathan Harrison

-Samuel, cutie pie with Relapsed ALL. Samuel is on a new protocol that doesn‘t involve the harsh chemo drugs that hurt him so much in the past. Please pray for them to work and for Samuel to have complete healing.

-Our friend Ethan. Ethan’s cancer is back. They have removed the cancer from his lungs, he’s had open heart surgery and now we wait to see if he will have chemo and radiation.

-Baby Eric the Warrior is on a different chemo treatment to try to get the cancer to finally go away for good. PRAY PRAY PRAY!!! Pray to Our Heavenly Father that Eric’s tumor is NOT growing, but shrinking! Better yet, pray that is in not even there anymore!!! www.caringbridge.org/visit/ericmeraz Little Eric is testimony to the power of prayer!!!!!

-Tyler Copley is doing well right now. He had his leg amputated. We went to visit and he is in great spirits, looking forward to his future. His family has been walking on this path for such a long time, I wonder if they can even remember when it wasn’t this way. Please pray for healing and comfort. Tyler just graduated HS!!! Way to go Tyler!!!

-Drew;2 yr old boy with neuroblastoma, Drew has a Carepage. www.carepages.org, the page name is Drew Kruszynski. Little Drew has been going through some rough times and really needs our prayers.

-Baby Z-Jay Wilms Tumor. Z-Jay recently relapsed and is undergoing more harsh treatment including radiation. Please pray for him and his family. Pray for Z-Jay’s parents to have strength during this time.

****************************************************

Please continue to pray for Damien, Jake, Morgan, Big Mike, Cameron, Shane, Ashley, Darrell, Donovan, Catie, Khadeem, Josh, Inaya, Austin, James, Imani, Christine, and Ashley D’s families as the struggle through their grief. I am so sad that I have to keep adding names to this list.

Also, please pray for Jim and George’s girls.

We have friends to we would like to ask you to pray for that are still in treatment
Jonathan from Denver. Leukemia relapse www.caringbridge.org/co/Jonathan Harrison
Ethan, 5 yr old with Medulloblastoma www.carepages.org carepage name-EthanJones
Samuel, 5 yr old with Relapsed ALL, alternative cancer treatment with no chemotherapy www.samuelbackus.homestead.com/SamuelsUpdates
Princess Kristen, 4 yr old with ALL
Kristen 18 yr old www.carepages.org carepage name- kristensivertsen
Jake 5 yr old with relapsed leukemia www.caringbridge.org/visit/teamrivers
Ricky almost 2 yr old with rhabdomyasarcoma
Lilly 2 yr old with ALL
New James, ALL
Joseph, 17 yr old with AML
Eric, 2 yr old with A.T.R.T Tumor www.caringbridge.org/visit/ericmeraz
Maddie 2 yr old with rare liver cancer
Maya, 2 yr old with neuroblastoma - www.caringbridge.org/visit/mayagonzalez
“The Cuteness” AKA Asher
Little Will Leukemia
François-ALL Leukemia
Baby Pyper Infant ALL - www.caringbridge.org/visit/pyperaddisynsellers
Baby Z-Jay Wilms Tumor
Baby Karson
Drew;2 yr old boy with cancer, Drew has a Carepage. www.carepages.org, the page name is Drew Kruszynski. You will definitely have to copy/paste that one!
Ariel, 12 yr old with AML
Nicholas DeLuca www.caringbridge.org/visit/nicholasdeluca

There are so many more, I cannot even remember all of their names. It will be a rough road ahead, but with our prayers, everything will work out. If you ever want to be added to this list, please don’t hesitate to email me and ask…audramama@yahoo.com

All of these families need to be lifted up in prayer.

PLEASE PRAY FOR HEALING TO JESUS FOR OUR KIDS AND SAFE RETURN FOR OUR TROOPS, HE IS LISTENING, HE WILL ANSWER OUR PRAYERS!!!

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
1 Corinthians 13:4-7

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