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Apr 28-May 04

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I thought I'd write an update. 

My new mantra is:  "I've come a long way, baby!"   & I'm proud of how far I've come.  

Anyway, in my last entry I was pretty frustrated with the INSOMNIA I was experiencing.  Since then, I've worked with my doctor to find a medication to help me.  As I've always said, I'm not big on taking pills BUT in this instance, I really felt I had no choice.  When you do not sleep, you are just not well at all.  You are not functioning well and it affects so many aspects of your life.  Now that I am sleeping better, I feel much better.   That being said, I mentioned to Troy the other day how I just wish I felt like I 'used to feel'...  I have great days but also not so great days.  Sometimes, I just do not have ANY energy.  I have been trying to do some exercising and yoga/meditation type things which does help.  It's just having the ambition to DO IT.  

I have another surgery scheduled on November 30.  Recently, a local hospital paused all elective surgeries (not my hospital) due to COVID.  My hope is that my surgery happens and is not affected by COVID.  But if it is, I will roll with the punches and accept that I'd have to have these expanders in longer.  Do I want them in longer?  Absolutely not.  They really are not comfortable.   I also have an appointment with my cancer surgeon on Friday.  Just realizing it is Friday the 13th.  Yikes.  It's a follow-up appointment from my cancer surgery so praying it goes well.  

I keep saying how 2020 needs to be over.  It's been a year.  I know you all know that.  But when you go through cancer in addition to everything else that's happened in the world, it IS a tad depressing at times. BUT I have learned SO MUCH THIS YEAR.  I've learned that things do not always turn out the way you planned.  I've learned that things can go wrong.  I've learned that you can get through bad times.   I've learned that life is full of surprises both positive and negative BUT it is all in how we respond that matters!!  When  I'm feeling down, I try to keep things in perspective and do a lot of reflecting.  I AM SO BLESSED!  I caught my cancer EARLY and had ALL OF IT REMOVED!  I like to think I've been strong on this journey.  But a big reason for having the strength I've had is because of all of the support I've received along the way!  Like last week, I received MORE GIFTS.  People are just incredibly thoughtful.  My friend said to me last week when she dropped her gift off that she knows how after a few months, things can get a little 'quiet' so she thought it was the right time to give me something.  AMAZING.  I also have people that continue to check in with me often.  AMAZING.  I really can't even express how much it means to me.  To all of you reading this, love you and here's to staying strong during these challenging times.  We are all in this together.  

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