Adjusting to life as a cancer survivor might just be the hardest part of this wacky life detour. 

After being medically beaten down by the fight to eradicate cancer from my body, I’m still struggling with fatigue and side effects, often making day-to-day living inconsistent. I miss out on time with family and freinds, work, gardening, reading and walks with the dogs while I attend to my still healing body, brain and spirit. 

During the fight against cancer, I don’t think I thought much about what the other side would look like, because I just kept putting one foot in front of the other. Now, my attention has shifted from “active treatments” (chemo, radiation and surgeries) to medication management, monthly injections and a myriad of side effects. 

As we crossed the finish line at the Portland Dragon Boat Festival this afternoon, I could barely catch my breath and I felt a tear streaming down my face, melding with the river water and sweat. As the boat slowed, I began to hear people cheering from the shore. My mind and body were in the boat, focused on crossing the finish line first, in-it-to-win-it, paddling in unison with my team. My inner voice pipped up, “Did we win? It doesn’t matter! You’re a winner just for being here! You just paddled in the womens C Division Finals! There is life after cancer. There is life after cancer. There is life after cancer!”

Life as a cancer survivor doesn’t come close the the “normalcy” I thought it would be, but in some ways it’s also much like life before the diagnosis. There are ups and downs. Some days are better than others. New issues arise, I make adjustments, and just keep putting one foot, or one paddle, in front of the other. Life as a survivor is a series of new chapters, in which I’m learning to trust my body again. I mean, trust is hard when misbehaving cancer cells tried to kill me. 

While the sport of dragon boating is a consistent moving target of improvement - to be stronger, faster, more focused, what’s easy is trusting my team, our coaches, our tillers, our callers/drummers and all the people paddling together. We show up for each other, we support and challenge one another and we have so much fun doing it!

Today’s races included a breast cancer survivors’ race with 5 boats competing, filled with 110 breast cancer survivors and dozens more cheering them on from the shore. As the women finished the race and walked off the docks, they were greeted by hundreds of festival participants and attendees lined up to greet them. Cheers, high-fives, smiles and tears were freely shared. 

Breast cancer survivors around the world participate in dragon boat racing because it empowers many to take back control of their bodies thanks to the healing power of water, exercise, community and the camaraderie of connecting and competing with other survivors. As I’ve shifted my attention from treating cancer to staying healthy and cancer-free, the dragon boat community supports and inspires me in survivorship. Oh, and if you’re wondering if we won a medal, all four of my team’s boats won a medal in this weekend’s competition! 

Finals