In August of 2011, I was faced with a decision about my birth control. I asked for a tubal ligation a.k.a. getting your tubes tied. My doctor said they no longer do that, instead they do a noninvasive procedure in office and you are guaranteed to be sterile.  It was a painful in office procedure that has given me years of wonderful side effects to go with it. Essure by Bayer.  For 9 years I had these implanted . One in each fallopian tube.  In that time my teeth have become brittle and my hair has gotten really thin. I gained weight mostly just a swollen belly. I had a rash that would not go away. I was not as mentally sharp as I had once been. I was always tired. This past Monday I had a laprascopic hysterectomy and the 😈 implants along with my tubes, ovaries, uterus and cervix are gone. Gone with it is that monthly  timeout on sexual relations. Once upon a time they weren't so bad but after the implants I would have miserable headaches, more bloating and the worse cramping than I ever imagined possible. At some point enough is enough, and I finally evicted the poison and escaped hell. Well... sort of, after my surgery I went through more hell but I am on the mend now.  The rash is almost cleared up which is absolutely unbelievable after 9 years of being Mrs. Itchybitchy. My teeth are forever fucked, my hair is thin but I won. Everyone I have asked  tells me the sex is so much better afterwards.  5 weeks and 1 day (But whose counting right) I will find out for myself . In celebration of my victory i bleached my hair really blonde, cuz blondes have all the fun. It is the little victories that add up to much more than you imagined they would