Wanna know what sucks, I found the only man on earth, that would even remotely make me consider marriage again. I couldn't be happier, unless I was cancer free too. BUT what sucks is I am fighting stage four cancer and if I get married it will stop part of my insurance that helps pay for treatment. So if I even consider actual marriage, its choosing to not fight for life for my kids, or for my other family, or my man. I found that 'you will just know' kind of love. And I happen to be sick, its a battle I will fight til I die, praying for remission, yet realistic and numbers don't lie. Something really wrong in this land of dreams...  yeah I can dream, I can fall in love, I can buy a home, I can fight for life, I can see doctors, I can get help, I can get medications. I Can NOT get married if I do I risk it all. Something is real wrong with that!