Hello Friends & Family!

I didn't realize just how long it's been since I last updated you until on I got on here... which I guess we should see  as a good thing?!  No news is good news, after all.  The last 7-8 months have been pretty low key and we've been hunkering down like everyone else, living the "covid life."  We've all stayed safe and healthy and continue to live in our little bubble in which she remains content and happy.  In June of last year we finally threw in the towel and opened things up a bit so she could at least spend time with her grand-kiddos and be able give and receive all the precious hugs.  Life needs some balance after all, and it's too damn short.  

With regards to her cancer recurrence, she's had a couple of CT's in the last 6 months and while they still show a few precarious lymph nodes, one of which that has started to grow, albeit slowly, her marker continues to stay steady and normal.  She has no discomfort and continues to live life as normally as possible given the circumstances.  We saw her oncologist this last Thursday and she thinks we should continue to stay on the "watch and wait" path, especially during Covid, vs. starting to aggressively treat it with chemotherapy.  It's small and growing slowly, so there's no rush to go that route, especially in her condition.  They did find an enlarged lymph node near her lung / armpit but doesn't look to be cancerous - however we'll be keeping an eye on it.  We'll get another CT in May and will continue to pray that it will stay on the slow growth path it's been on since Sept of 2019.  🙏🏼

I will add that in October she was diagnosed with moderate (borderlining severe) dementia, so we've had that challenge added to our plate(s).  It was a hard thing to come to terms with, although in the same breath not surprising based on the rapid cognitive decline we were seeing over the course of a good 8 months or so.  Geoff and I decided to have her undergo a comprehensive neuropsychological evaluation back in September - I was with her for the first hour or so, and it was one of the hardest things I've had to be a part of / witness.  She was scared and confused and couldn't remember what year it was, when/how my Dad died, when she moved to Virginia, etc.  She just kept looking at me, her gaze helpless, wanting me to answer everything for her, and I couldn't (until he would ask me to intervene).  It broke my heart.  She got through all 4.5 hours of it, said "it was the worst day of of her life" and pleaded that she'll never have to do it again.  I promised her that that was it.  Never again. 

We got the detailed and sobering results in late-October.  She was confused and somewhat un-phased as he read them to us (which is probably a good thing) and I had a hefty cry in my car after I dropped her off.  She's since had a brain MRI which simply solidified vascular dementia and she's now on a medication that will (hopefully) help slow the progression.  I've also put her on a wait-list for assisted living / memory care at Sunnyside.  We would never put her anywhere during Covid, but we know it's something we'll need down the road - even if it's a year from now.  With the support and guidance from loved ones and the wonderful staff at Sunnyside, I took the leap and made it official in November (admittedly I was reluctant - it was a big step for me).  In the meantime, we've tossed the idea around of having her move into our house, but that is truly the LAST thing she wants to do, which I can understand.  She loves her home and she calls it her little sanctuary.  It's beautiful, quiet and peaceful - which is the polar opposite of our house with 3  cooped-up kids, a crazy yellow lab and a very bossy cat.   We don't have a guest room either - so it would require a good bit of upheaval for all off us (and we have stairs whereas her home does not).  So FOR NOW, we're holding tight.  I'm managing and monitoring her medications like a hawk, she's cooking less (which is a good thing), and she's content.  She can drink her coffee, read the paper and look at old photo albums and pictures for hours.  She's doing a lot of reminiscing, continues to visit with friends and family over the phone, and loves her Hallmark movies.  For a change of scenery, the kids have been staying at her house once a week to keep her entertained and on her toes.  They go for walks, cook and read together, watch movies, and laugh.  All three LOVE spending the night at their Grandmama's... even our 6'0" tall, almost 16-year old Graham still does.  They have quite the bond.  It's pretty awesome. ❤️

So that's where things are at!  All in all, I'd say it's pretty good.  It's all about the silver lining(s) - which we have many of - and for all of those, I am grateful. 

Much LOVE,
Steph, Shari and Fam