Treatments Over ☑️

Cancers Over ☑️

I am so ready to move forward past treatments, surgeries, and cancer…. I am not oblivious, I will have scans, periodic blood work, and daily meds, BUT, I get to try to move forward and not live in that fog of cancer aftermath. 

Surgery results were great!!!! Everything was benign! They removed my right side expander, a lot of scar tissue from under my arm pit area from the removal of all those lymph nodes last year, all the muscle and everything else on the right that was under the expander, then a full left mastectomy. To say I am sore and struggling with healing is an understatement, it’s been rough. Sleeping in the recliner for 2 weeks now, and most likely 2-3 more weeks due to the drains and I cannot lay flat or be able to roll and pull the drains out. I had 4 body drains when I left the hospital, 2 came out after 1 week, but the remaining 2 will be there for a bit. I have to be under a certain fluid level that I’m over double daily at this point. Drains are DISGUSTING…. Chunks of tissue, strings of blood clots, and stuff I cannot explain what all comes through them. It’s seriously gross. My incisions are much worse than I thought they would be. I have horrible looking incisions from behind the upper top of my arm pit going into my back from side to side with a small 1-2” break in the middle of my chest. They removed muscle and everything, left nothing for cancer to grow on I guess. It is very con-caved in, and they said eventually once all the swelling and fluid is gone, you will most likely see my rib cage. It definitely won’t be pretty, but I will not have anymore surgeries, and I’m removing as much as possible to get rid of all the cancer cells as possible. Living longer and having a better peace of mind for my type of cancer was not getting implants. Everyone is different in that decision.

My future, we just keep watching, testing, and being aware of my own body changes. My cancer was aggressive, rare HER diagnoses, and chances of future re-occurance is something we know can happen, BUT, I’m going to live life while I can😊

August was a tough month for our family, and as some of you may already know, we lost Ryan’s mom Sharon on August 15th. Sharon was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2020, right before our wedding in Colorado. Her breast cancer was in remission still as of march this year at testing, yet we found out after she went into the ER on 7/21 with headaches that her breast cancer had metastasized into her brain.  It all happened so fast. We miss her so incredibly much already. Sharon welcomed me into her family right away, and not only loved me, but loved my boys. She was very close with Ryan, and she told me every chance that she got how happy she was that we found each other❤️ We are currently going through the process of cleaning out her house and I have enjoyed finding all the photo albums and pictures to learn more and more about Ryan’s childhood and family. 

School has started back up, Landyn is a senior at the career center, and Gavin is a Junior. The next 2 years will be busy to say the least! I am thankful to be healthy going into it. Landyn is starting hockey season, and excited to get back to it. I’m excited to watch him play this year, I’ve missed it. Gavin is still working away at Penn station with Ashtin. Ashtin was promoted at work to Assistant GM, and bought a new car this past week. I know this isn’t his forever, just a stepping stone, but he is working hard, saving a lot, and growing up. 

Ryan is working a ton, he got a promotion earlier this summer as well. He has tried to fit in some traveling this year, and enjoy skiing and his motorcycle. He went to Vermont, New York, and PA skiing this year, along with white water rafting in WV this summer on a bike trip. We haven’t been able to travel together much at all this year, but hoping a healthier future changes that. 

On top of all this, my mom has still been focusing on her health. The doctors are great at new scans every few months, and monitoring everything to be aware of any changes. They did some traveling this summer and the boys and I were able to spend 6 days with them in Tennessee at Dale Hollow last month. My mom is one of the strongest women I know and I hope that I have her strength.

Lastly, I’ve had alot going through my head the past 6 weeks or so, and it’s been hard to get out of it all and stay positive every day. From the moment my doctors said new spots, new cancer, and rushed moving up surgery, I’ve just felt defeated. When I look at it on good days, I get angry with myself, as I have so much to be thankful for. But cancer, it just has a way of making you feel defeated. You look at so many stories of people losing their lives to this horrible disease, and so many re-occurrences, it’s hard to not think the worst. But that moment last week when I was sitting in that doctors office and Nancy, My PA, walks in with a big smile and says she has amazing news for me, I just can’t and won’t forget that feeling…. Hearing her read off every biopsy area, and noting BENIGN, after each, It still brings tears to my eyes. I keep trying to remember that when I get down about the daily surgical set backs I keep having. Being stuck at home, in a chair sleeping, not being allowed to do much,  with body drains, no driving, and home alone alot, is depressing to say the least. I just have to keep looking at the big picture, my future is bright, and this too shall pass.

Thank you all for always listening, praying, sending your good vibes, and just loving us. We appreciate it more than you will ever know.