First and foremost - we thank each of you for the overwhelming support and love that you showered on us this past year. We have moved from our normal Facebook posts to a Caring Bridge site to make it easier for us to update you on dad's condition.
It breaks our hearts to write this next piece.
Dad was diagnosed with prostate cancer in 2016 while living an adventure in Australia with mom and Jaime. Treatment was going well for years and we had every hope that his cancer was caught early enough and could be kept at bay or in remission. Before Christmas last year, dad visited Mayo and was told that contrary to what his cancer doctor had told him - the cancer was not contained, but rather had spread to his lymph nodes and bones. Dad went on to shift doctors to Mayo's partner doctor in Minneapolis and took an aggressive treatment plan of radiation, chemo, and immunotherapy. It has been a challenging journey for him with ups and downs - hope and heartache. And our dad has muscled through with faith and classic Roddy humor (and sometimes dark humor - "I'm still on this side of the dirt," he often says when he is asked how he is doing).
Dad's health has taken a difficult and unfortunate turn. Only a few weeks ago, we were celebrating Dad's approval for immunotherapy which was supposed to offer some serious hope for effective treatment.
Two days before Thanksgiving, Dad was rushed to ER suffering from COVID + another stroke. At this point, we were faced with the hard reality that the cancer is winning and his medication was causing too many strokes and just making life very difficult. At Thanksgiving, Dad asked simply that treatments stop and that he enjoy Christmas with the love of his life of 47 years and his girls - and his beloved grandkids (that he calls his boys).
We have engaged hospice and they have shared that they believe Dad has 1-3 months in this realm with us.
Because we only know how to speak transparently - this news has been devastating to us. And although Dad still maintains his lovable and sometimes cringey humor, he is so much more quiet which has made us hate the cancer all the more. Because how could the cancer take from our beloved Roddy his irresistible ability to entertain and engage? But we are thankful for every moment we have with him.
Dad is not afraid of death - he has held the hands of the dying for decades. Comforted family members and preached on the exciting afterlife of heaven. He knows where he is going.
Our mom is a superhero. Our dad is her everything - her epic love story. And her man since she was 17 years old. They have served Christ and their communities together - selflessly giving of themselves with no pursuit of earthly riches their whole adult lives. She is by our dad's side every moment of every day.
Our ask is for prayers and virtual support. Our parents are simply not ready yet for visitors yet. But your words, calls, or messages mean the world to them.
Dad is so appreciative for the friends and connections that he has made over the course of his amazing life. He retells stories of old friends that he can pick up where he left off with, college adventures where he was fondly known as "The Roach" (not for drug related reasons), memories of being a teacher, a basketball coach, a pastor, a youth pastor, a worship leader, guitar player, an artist, a luthier, a community theater star, and a friend. He loves reading your messages and reminiscing as he seems to be in a phase of reminiscent introspection and a review of his life's work.
And while all of this feels very heavy and final - we are still leaving room in our hearts, in our prayers and in our hopes for a miracle. We would love the gift of more time with the Dad we know and love. We know that nothing is too big, too complex or too far for God. But we also stand back and acknowledge that this is outside of our control. And so we end this post with these lyrics from Mercy Me that illustrates (better than we could ever capture) our journey on acceptance and faith in the midst of heartache:
"They say it only takes a little faith to move a mountain Well good thing a little faith is all I have, right now But God, when You choose to leave mountains unmovable Oh give me the strength to be able to sing It is well with my soul I know You're able and I know You can Save through the fire with Your mighty hand But even if You don't My hope is You alone I know the sorrow, and I know the hurt Would all go away if You'd just say the word But even if You don't My hope is You alone You've been faithful, You've been good All of my days Jesus, I will cling to You Come what may."
We will keep this site updated with pictures and updates. Thank you, dear friends, for your love, prayers and support. Keep them coming. And please feel free to send messages via this site - Mom and Dad love your notes. We appreciate and love you all! Hug your loved ones a little more this Christmas.
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