On Wednesday, I got my first tattoos. Nothing decorative, just little dots on my skin to guide the radiation machines. The needling was the worst part of the procedure that day, although it's unsettling to think of radiation beams shooting through your body, even if it's for a good purpose.   By the way, those of you who have tattoos are NUTS (I say this lovingly, of course)! It was not a pleasant experience, and I won't be getting any more, if I can help it!

The cancer battle continues, even though I have had good results from chemo and surgery. It is a battle that will last through June, and I am already a weary warrior! Today I start 9 rounds (one every three weeks) of Keytruda to help my body continue to fight cancer, and make it more likely that this nasty stuff won't come back. On the 24th I start radiation for several weeks, same purpose. They tell me both treatments will make me tired, but truth be told, I am already tired--tired of all the treatments of the past 10 months. The lump was detected in March last year; what a journey it has been! But I can see an end point, so I'll just keep pushing through.

That reminds me of something I heard last week on the Daily Audio Bible. After the daily reading, people call with prayer requests and encouragements, and I was really moved by what a woman from New York shared. She is praying for parents whose children are estranged from them (oh, I can relate to that, unfortunately!). She ended by saying, "PUSH, everyone! Pray Until Something Happens!" It was wise advice, and it made me smile. Prayer is a lifeline, whether we see immediate results or not. We need to keep praying, and push through!

Without prayer, I couldn't have endured this last year with as much peace and calm as I have. I pray when I feel good, I pray when I feel weary, and I can somehow feel that others are praying for me, too. Prayer gives me strength. It's a mysterious thing, capable of bringing comfort, peace, and hope, if I cooperate with it and receive it. Not being an expert on the theology of prayer, I don't know how it works. I only know it does, whether my prayers are for others, for myself, or whether I know people are praying for me.

Prayer for others: Focusing my mind on others' prayer needs is a lovely, enlivening distraction for me. Praying for others gets my focus off of my own issues, and by the end of the prayer list, my heart always feels lighter. It's not a matter of self-satisfaction ("Look what I accomplished today!" or even "Wow, I'm glad that's not my problem!"). It's a matter of centering my mind on what is possible and good, and feeling love well up for whoever is the object of the prayer. That's good medicine for my soul (and probably my body, with the release of endorphins).

Praying for myself. When I look to Jesus for comfort, peace and healing, it also puts my focus on Him, and off of what I am experiencing, or fearing. When I start my prayer time with worship, remembering Who He is, and what He's done for me already, the effect is strongest. If I'm too distracted or weary to think of reasons to thank Him or praise Him, I only need to look around at creation, and the appreciation (worship) rises up. Again, this is good medicine for the soul. I don't need to linger on my list of cares and woes after that, if I don't want to. Just a few words bracketed by "please" and "thank you" will do. God knows the details.  He is also able to handle a long session of complaint and anxiety; just read the Psalms!  I just need to keep communicating with Him, no matter what.  It builds our relationship, and my trust Him.

Receiving prayer. The benefits of receiving prayer are mysterious, too. Sometimes I feel the prayers some of you are sending up on my behalf. I can't explain it further than that. There have been many times since I started treatment, and people were praying, when fear has tried to get a grip on me, but the fear evaporates almost immediately. In my natural self, I'd have a good panic-wallow! But somehow, your prayers have helped keep fear at bay, all year long.  WOW.  This is what the Bible, in Philippians 4:7, is talking about: "Then you will experience God's peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ." It's an amazing thing to experience. Thank you, my praying friends! God invites us to participate in this wonderful support system for each other. 

This year my resolution is to focus on, and look for, the things that are good, noble, beautiful, and true. Prayer fits all the categories, and is probably better for me than any of the treatments I've been through so far. I hope those of you who pray will keep on, and those of you who haven't will be moved to try it out.

These verses are great preparation for any time of prayer:

Philippians 4
4 Always be full of joy in the Lord. I say it again—rejoice! 5 Let everyone see that you are considerate in all you do. Remember, the Lord is coming soon. 6 Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. 7 Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus. 8 And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. 9 Keep putting into practice all you learned and received from me—everything you heard from me and saw me doing. Then the God of peace will be with you.

Prayer requests:

• That the treatments go smoothly.
• Eliana turns 16 on Saturday!! Help us to savor every moment with her as she continues to move toward adulthood. 
• For healing in our family relationships that are strained.
• Paul is stepping in to lead our homeschool co-op class, since I'll be in treatments a great deal this semester. This is out of his comfort zone! Please pray he'll enjoy the journey.

If you need prayer, let me know! There are also some wonderful prayer support groups at our church, or online, that you could join. Even if you don't believe what I believe, it can make a difference in your life!  Don't try to do life alone.

May the God of peace be with each one of you! Thank you for your continuing love and encouragement.