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May 19-25

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Update #10 - Message from Rachel:

Y’all, it’s been over a month already!! 😱💪🏻 This healing has been a lot of pain, but so much better than the last time 🙏😭.  I know Windy kept everyone updated during the surgery and subsequent days, but I wanted to say thank you myself, for the prayers, support, thoughts, messages, sending me cream cheese cake and my boba….all of it. All the things. 🩵 I know the surgical, physical recovery is due to an incredible doctor and his medical team, but the mental and emotional healing are due to all the help I have had.

I haven’t even been able to see my messages on social media due to not being able to be on my phone hardly at all because of the headaches it gives me, but Windy would keep me updated and I just felt all the encouragement and prayers from bed. I do know I had conversations with some people while I was in ICU and in the hotel recovering, I’m sure they were awesome but I probably don’t remember them until reminded😔😬.  My apologies! I remember Hannah calling me while I was right out of recovery and me complaining, indignant, to her about an IV placement in my foot 😅😅and I remember her crying and crying and me saying I was ok, but she was actually crying because I was “lucid” and not in a total state of panic and confusion.

I don’t know how to express my absolute relief and gratefulness for the exact same reason. This re-do was like the day compared to the very dark night of the first time. So many of y’all knew of my severe ptsd and worry and anxiety going into this. I don’t think I’ve cried so much for so many months going into an operation as I did this one. And regardless of if my TN is actually “cured” for a time (in remission) or not, I know the surgeon was successful in many ways. Some symptoms that I was told were impossible to have are now gone.  I feel validated and hopeful. I just have no words and am so grateful and so humbled that it was possible. So. I wanted to let y’all know that and get to be grateful with me 🙏.  No matter how bad the pain has been this last month, that’s just what I keep repeating, nothing is as bad as it was the first time around. And my fear is gone and what a powerful fear it was. So thank you to all who were so close during every moment of this and didn’t mind my tears.

I love y’all so much. 🩵🫶🏻 Rae

(Pic of when I got to finally put my feet in the sand and watch a beautiful sunset before embarking on the roadtrip...)

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