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May 05-11

This Week

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I'm getting pretty tired. I really need to try and sleep in a bit more. This morning I was feeling really dreamy in the middle third of my walk. Maybe just because the podcast wasn't too riveting.
I emailed my manager yesterday, requesting not to be asked to do extra shifts all the time. I'm getting so exhausted. I started nearly falling asleep on my walk with Witi yesterday. That's a first, as normally walking is what wakes me up. Anyway, my manager just replied with Duly Noted. I'm sure she thinks I'm an absolute prat now.
Peter-times are intense. Sometimes I feel like my heart will burst, with the anguish.
One early morning, a couple of weeks ago, I was walking down Lake Panorama Drive and I saw this swirling, on the side of the road. I put it in the same class as the other potential signs/visitations from Pete : the picked daffodil, the ladybird, the slug on Jingle, the dented can, and the flashing street light by the Maori school.
I'm still painting his name everywhere. Usually once a day, in a mostly hidden place. It gives me a flash of happiness each time I spy his name somewhere.
I miss Pete so much. The hope of finding him is the only thing that keeps me going.

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