Journal entry by Paula Conrad —
Seventeen months and two weeks ago, I was diagnosed with stage 3 invasive ductal carcinoma of the left breast.
Since then, I’ve gone though 6 infusions of big chemo, a double mastectomy with 20 lymph nodes removed, 14 rounds of light chemo, 29 radiation treatments, 44 weeks of 4 daily clinical-trial pills, and cancelled reconstructive surgery due to low platelets — oh, plus Covid, shingles, and radiation pneumonitis.
All of that led to July 22, now known as Halle Berries Day, which was a success! The surgery was in four parts: removal of tissue expanders and insertion of regular implants; liposuction of my belly to put fat on the implants for a nicer, Halle-esque look; removal of my ovaries and fallopian tubes to prevent recurrence; and removal (finally!) of my chemo port. I’m definitely in some pain today, but I know that will subside soon.
Cancer, you are a sneaky, evil beast, but you didn’t break me. I wouldn’t be able to write that sentence without the love and support of my family, friends, colleagues and medical team. Thank God for all of you — and especially my family members and close friends who held me up on the darkest of days.
So what’s next? I will take a daily pill to suppress estrogen (the fuel of my cancer) for 10 years and keep a close eye on development of new treatments to prevent recurrence. Most important, though, is that I will continue to start each day by saying, “Today is a good day to have a good day” and do my best to stick to that mindset. (Note: exceptions are given during Cubs seasons like this.)
Last night, my brother Mark posted an update on this page from the hospital, including my ritual of including a link to a relevant Seinfeld scene. We must have a psychic connection because that’s what I planned to include in this post. You see, when the Seinfeld finale aired in 1998, my best pal Tina had a party at which everyone had to dress as a character, but not one of the main four. Tina was Man Hands and I was Sue Ellen Mischke — my costume was Tina’s bra and at least a roll of Scott tissue for each cup. You bet there’s photographic evidence, which Tina provided and is attached. You’re very welcome.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=hoQudXNVGmE
Thank you again for your words of encouragement during this long road. I close this final (please, God) post by asking two things of you: remember to get those cancer screenings and know in your heart that today really is a good day to have a good day.
With love,
Paula “Halle Berries At Last” Conrad
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