Welcome to our CaringBridge website for Dad. We are using it to keep family and friends updated in one place. We appreciate your support and words of hope and encouragement, and especially for prayers.
Dad has always been our protector, caring and compassionate Father and brought us up to have a strong Faith in God. Back in 2018, he became ill with a staph infection and was in a care center for about five months and had complained of back pain, but they didn't do much about it. Then, one day he fell and was back in the hospital. We asked the hospitalist (attending doctor) if the staph could be in his back and she said yes. So, they did an MRI and found the staph had moved to his lower vertebrae and he had surgery within the next 24 hours. Following the surgery, he had no more pain! The spine surgeon removed/scraped out the staph and placed a cage and pins in his back. He also had some memory loss and confusion, which they attributed to the staph infection. Six months in a care facility (don't want him to EVER go back there!) and it took a fall for them to figure out the source of his back pain.
Fast forward to 2022. Over the past few years, Dad has seemed to have some confusion and short-term memory loss, but we thought perhaps it was early onset dementia. He also seemed to take more naps - which we thought was because he liked to be on the computer, playing solitaire or checking out friends' post on Facebook. He would go to McDonald's with his buddies almost on a daily basis. Then he started forgetting where he was...thinking he was at the cabin when he was in Brooklyn Park.
He has always been proud of his 1956 Chevy Belair and his grandson, Max would be with him at the Back to the 50's at the Fairgrounds every year to help him set up and volunteer at the gate. As many of you know, he built his car from scratch - we still remember when he brought the "skeleton" home and Mom thought, "What are you going to do with that?" Well, he has always loved cars and knows nearly everything about them (mostly Chevy or VW) and he turned that "piece of junk on a trailer" into his pride and joy! He also built a matching trailer from the front and back ends of another 56 and when he is driving down the road, you cannot tell if it's the back of the car or the trailer that you see in front of you! We had no idea how different this year would be...
They are usually at the grounds and ready to volunteer by 5 am. Dad didn't go out and polish the car and trailer the night before like he usually does - he was tired. Then they didn't get on the road until 5 am. Dad has had the same spot at the show for over 20 years...but this year, someone got their sooner and took his spot. They ended up in a different spot - same street, but up the road. I texted Max to see how Papa was doing - it was 96 degrees outside and Dad is 86 years old, also Diabetic so we wanted to make sure he was okay in the heat. His response was, "Well, he is sitting in his chair under the tree talking with people and has his jacket on." I told my Mom and she said, "He has a T-shirt, sweatshirt AND jacket on!" My fear was he was going to overheat and I asked Max to make sure he drinks lots of water and to keep an eye on him. Later that night, Mom wondered why they hadn't arrived back at home yet. Max let Dad drive, thinking it may be his last year to drive. They had long-passed the turn to go home and Max said to him, "Papa, I think you missed the turn." Dad replied, "No, just let me know when we cross the river." Max told him, "We crossed it about 30 minutes ago." They stopped for gas...they were all the way in Monticello/Big Lake. They got gas, turned around and headed home. They found a small problem with the car, so did not return to the show the next day. Dad oddly did not get that upset about it. He NEVER misses that show...
A few weeks had passed and he started getting more forgetful and confused, so Mom asked the doctor to do an MRI. I had stopped over to their house and as he was putting his belt on, Mom remarked about his pants and asked where he found them. He replied, "I wore them home," and she said, "Wore them home from where?" He said, "From the cabin." He looked at me and rolled his eyes and said, "where did I find them?" "You weren't at the cabin," she said. "Where do you think you are now?" He looked at her and said, "We're at the cabin." She said, "No we're not - we are home in Brooklyn Park." Then, he turned to me and said, "She doesn't know what she's talking about." I looked at him and said, "Dad, I am here at your house in your kitchen in Brooklyn Park."
I left for Nashville on July 24 for a work conference, not expecting the news we were going to get when I left. Mom called me Tuesday night after our big dinner at the conference and asked if I could come home on the Thursday night flight (I was scheduled to leave Nashville Friday morning at 6 am) and at first didn't say why. She then told me she was worried about me driving to the airport at 3:30 am and Karin said there were open seats on the Thursday night flight...I knew something was up when she said that (Karin is a Flight Attendant for Delta), so I asked her what the doctor said about Dad's MRI. She then told me they found two tumors - one smaller about his right ear and a larger tumor in his frontal lobes above his eyes and it covered both sides of the brain. I told her I would fly home the next day if she wanted me to. She said no, she just wanted me to be at the Neurosurgeon appointment Friday morning. So, I changed my flight to come home Thursday night. I wasn't feeling well that day (felt cold coming on), and wore a mask when Mom and Dad picked me up from the airport that night. I got home, took a COVID test and it didn't even take 5 minutes to go to positive and stay there. I was not able to be at the appointment the next morning. Fortunately, I wore a thick mask Thursday night and was not in the car long so did not expose them to it.
Friday morning, July 29 the Neurosurgeon told us they would do a needle biopsy on the smaller tumor to determine what type and stage it was. The biopsy was scheduled for August 8. Lots of prayers and trying to absorb what was happening. We asked the surgeon how long he thought it had been there and he wasn't sure. We are wondering now if it wasn't starting back in 2018 and was more than just a staph infection.
Mom called me one morning and told me the night before they were going to bed and he had not yet come back so she got up to see what he was doing. Fortunately, she had hidden all of the car keys and was now giving him his daily meds. She looked outside and found him inside the VW. The battery was dead so he couldn't go anywhere, but she asked what he was doing and he said, "I have to go sort the papers..." She told him, "You don't need to sort any papers, come in and come to bed." Dad had a paper route back when he was 16...he was reliving that time.
August 8 would be a day we will never forget. Mom, Karin, Irene, Max, Jack and Ben all came to the hospital for Papa's surgery. The surgeon came out and told us that it was stage 4 melanoma. We asked what could be done. Because of his Diabetes, steroids are really not an option. Could they do radiation - yes. Will he improve - no. They could not do surgery because of the location of the large tumor - right above his ocular area. He said we needed to think about his quality of life. Thirty years ago, he said stage 4 meant about 3 months. Today, there are different things they can do. However, given his age and health some things may be too risky and may cause more extensive memory loss and confusion. He said the next step would be oncology. He did feel the cancer had spread from melanoma he had in his back a year ago. It spreads through the blood stream and was now in his brain.
At this point, we would try to spend every chance we could with him and keep the memories alive and prayers coming!
Words cannot express the kindness, compassion and love shown by all of you who knew my Dad. Whether you attended his visitation and/or service on Wednesday, sent cards, messages on Facebook or here on CaringBridge, texted, called or prayed or came to see him at the house or in the care centers, it was so overwhelming to see the amount of love and support you have given our family. We knew how special he was, but you all confirmed that.
Dad was a very special person - as you all know. He was one of the kindest, compassionate and faithful people you could ever meet. To say he was loved by all is an understatement. Anyone who knew him understands what I am talking about. As Jack, Ben and Max mentioned as they shared their thoughts about their Papa at his Celebration of Life he made such an impact on everyone who knew him. He told them, "Be Safe...and if you can't be safe, be careful." He always made us feel safe and was careful in everything he did. Meticulous about everything - from building/working on cars, snowmobiles and anything he made to the care he gave in his community, work and just being "Norm."
We know he is now with Jesus and cancer-free, pain-free and with his parents and relatives, all of his friends who have gone before him and even his 4-legged buddies - Skippy, Candy and Maynard. He is catching up with Grandma and Grandpa, playing one heck of a Kings in the Corner game with Grandpa P and Grandpa R as well as Cribbage, Poker, Play Nine or Washers with his friends and no doubt making everyone laugh with his impressions, Norwegian jokes and smile! He is telling Jesus THANK YOU - we know he was needed up there!
As Pastor Milbrath, Jack, Ben and Max shared at his service...He loved his family and friends and definitely knew how to make everyone feel special...I know he made US feel that way.
As we said Goodbye at his bedside, his service at church and his gravesite...it wasn't really "Goodbye" but more of a "See you again someday" in Heaven. Ecclesiastes 3 says there is a time for everything...definitely true!
On the Wings of a Dove was one of Dad's favorite songs and as we said "See you again" Ferlin Husky reminded us through that song that "A sign from above, on the wings of a Dove!"
I am attaching a link to Rascal Flatts' "I Won't Let Go" because the words are very much what the Bible says and how Dad felt about everyone in his life.
THANK YOU all for being a part of Dad's life (and ours). We are truly blessed - Love to all ❤️ 🙏 🤗
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