One year ago today, our lives changed forever. The title of this post is taken from a song in the musical RENT, which describes different ways we can measure a year, such as in sunsets, in cups of coffee, in laughter, in strife, and most importantly, in love.

Two friends in my life, who also happen to be widows, frequently remind me that grief and happiness can coexist. Two things can be true at the same time, even if the emotions associated with those two things seem like polar opposites.

Take the Daddy Party for example. It was everything I had hoped it would be and so much more. Grief and happiness coexisted beautifully. So much grief for the loss of an amazing man, so much happiness that the party was perfect. David would have loved it.

To my boys. As you move forward in your lives, I hope that you carry your memories of Daddy with you. I will do my very best to help with this. The book, The Invisible String, reminds us that our connection to Daddy persists. I just know that he will always be behind you to have your back, and he will always be in front of you to lead the way.

The first few photos posted here are from the best Daddy Party there ever was. You can see my smile from a mile away. But please don't be fooled. My heart also overflows with grief. (Just because she carries it well doesn't mean it isn't heavy. -unknown) The last photo is from today, the day the murder dresser died. Good fucking riddance. Thanks to Lisa for knowing people who always have multiple sledgehammers at the ready.

I learned something today. Sun dials only measure the time when there is light. So as I close this post and this blog as a whole, let's make a deal for the coming years. Let's mimic sun dials and measure our years in times of brightness. And while Dave loved cloudy days the most, I know he'd fully support us all trying to be the best sun dials possible.

Whatever you do, make Dave proud. Keep things in perspective. We've got this.