I want to thank you for celebrating Fig's life the way he wanted.  He was very specific to me about what he wanted at the end of his life.  No. 1 was to have no ceremonies, no sadness, and no eulogies.  He described exactly that he wanted a celebration of life at St. Pius X where his friends and family enjoy his favorite foods and beer.  He did not want us to stand around sad and crying but he wanted us to talk and laugh.  You all did fabulous.  I know he was looking at us with a smile.  He had me write down what foods he wanted to be served.  Well that wasn't enough and so he texted me a list. 

Here is what the list stated exactly in the text:

• Foo sack fingers  (this was added for his daughter that he knew wouldn't eat anything else 😂)
• 30 Dew Drop dogs
• 6 cases Miller Lite
• Deer Park water
• Ice
• 65 qt yeti
• 110 qt igloo
• Charge both UE Boom speakers in case venue has no sound system.
• See about ability to play and see pictures

In our discussions he wanted Jenny's pimento cheese recipe on a small roll with conecuh sausage.  I told him I was sure that I would be too distraught to make that and it would need to be stuff I could buy and pick up.  Thankfully all our friends and family handled the food and he got exactly what he wanted.  Also thankfully they did more dew drop dogs and beer or the majority of you wouldn't have gotten any. 

Father Nicholas was amazing to our family and did so many things that Fig asked of him even though it was not the norm.  

The day after Fig passed in my discussions with Fr. Nicholas I learned that catholic faith requires the Urn of Ashes to be buried or placed in a mausoleum.  This was something Fig and I did not know nor had ever discussed.  So I ended up buying a plot at Pine Crest Cemetery.  On Friday, October 20th, with his immediate family present we buried him.  

I have to say that we did exactly what Fig wanted and it was perfectly beautiful.  He was loved by so many people and I hope you all felt it was perfect as well.

As for me I have been incredibly sad, broken, and lost.  These words don't begin to describe what it is like.  It is weird how your brain stops working and the ability to focus on anything just stops.  I haven't wanted to see anyone because I know I would just cry or not be good company.  The books I have been reading say it is a very long process and that we will never be the same people we were.  I say a lot of this because even though the kids and I have turned down a lot of offers we don't want you to stop asking because one day we will say yes it is just not right now.

If you read this and have not talked to your spouse about what you want for your end of life you really need to do that now.  It's very important and knowing it makes such a huge difference.  I also plan to return back to the funeral home and cemetery and make a lot of my plans so that my kids don't have to deal with all that when they are hurting the most.  It was very long days making the funeral/cemetery arrangements/contracts.  

Lastly, I want to reiterate what I have said previously, make plans with your loved ones, travel and see the things on your bucket list, don't use work or cost as your excuse.  Time is too short and our health can change so quickly.  It's so important to realize what really matters is each other and your family.

I am so thankful for all of you that have been propping me and my kids up so we keep moving forward.  Thank you.

🧡Missy