Let’s be clear: Mark’s story is one of love and joy! But the following is a description of what has transpired in the last two weeks.
On January 22 Mark went to the emergency room with calf pain after being directed immediately there by a doctor he had gone to see. The pain in his legs had been persistent for three weeks. We thought it must have something to do with his exercise. Mark had gotten in shape by running an hour every day and playing frisbee with the guys. In the emergency room they found blood clots in his lower legs. This effectively ended his NBA career just like Chris Bosh. The doctors were going to give him medicine and send him home, but out of the abundance of caution they did a ct scan of the lungs. There were clots in his lungs as well so he was admitted on January 23rd (after an unfortunate overnight stay in the ER waiting for a room). They started a slow infusion of Heparin to thin the blood and decrease the clots. They were small and did not need to be removed surgically. We were relieved but unsure of why the clots had formed. The plan was to visit a hematologist to get to the cause after we were discharged.
When they did a ct scan of the lungs, the doctors saw from a partial view of the pancreas something they did not like. They ordered a ct scan of the entire abdomen just to make sure all was well. They said it could just be some scarring from a drink “or two”. As it is entirely possible that he did imbibe one “or two” in the past, we awaited the results with very little trepidation.
On the morning of the 24th a new doctor came to visit and asked if we were up to speed. We said yes assuming he was talking about the blood clots. After a few short very confusing moments we asked him to please start from the beginning. He told us that there was a mass in the body of the pancreas and lesions on both lobes of the liver. He said it looked malignant and wanted to do a biopsy on the liver. The liver is much more accessible and would confirm the pancreatic origin. The waiting game continued for the day until a friend of ours who is a doctor there swooped in with his cape on and began to make things happen. He scheduled the biopsy and performed it himself that night. Where they had said we wouldn’t get results til the next week, he said he’d get them in two days at the most and arranged for our discharge Thursday morning the 25th. He had been helpful and attentive our entire stay and made the whole ordeal so much more bearable. Dr. Bob Beasley is one of our angels!
As I’m sure you already know, we were surrounded by Heffernans and a few close friends from the time we thought it was just blood clots. Room 697 could almost always be heard from down the hall and there were as many laughs as there were tears. Damn people followed us home, too! Without them I don’t know how we would have made it this far!
On Friday the 26th we were told the results were in but the doctor had left and no one else in the office could open them until Monday. A quick call to Dr. Beasley changed that once again. He read us the results and confirmed it was stage 4 adenocarcinoma of pancreatic origin. The crew was at the house so we shared the disappointing but not surprising news. We shared some tears then we caravanned to a favorite restaurant and did what we do (eat, talk loudly and laugh like idiots).
Saturday night we celebrated Kathy’s 50th birthday. There were 16 of us including out of towners Scott, Lauren and Auberta. Before dinner, Scott and David showed up with a 24 foot pontoon party barge. Needless to say it was a good night!
On Tuesday the 30th the doctors appointments started. We’ve seen two oncologists and have files and samples being sent to a third (Dr. Warshaw of the Warshaw Institute in Boston). Thanks to ‘little’ brother David, we were able to get in to see the very best in Miami at the Miami Cancer Institute (part of Baptist hospital). Dr. Antonio Ucar will be our oncologist and has a unbelievable team with him.
Monday the 29th the aforementioned super hero Dr. Beasley placed the port for the chemo to start on Wednesday. Tuesday morning we spent on the boat and Tuesday afternoon we had a one to one meeting with a lady who taught us about our chemo.
Wednesday we started this website and away we go! Onward and upward, positive vibes, laughter and tears. We’re not GOING to be ok; we already are!
Please forgive my absence here as I have been navigating these last two months without Mark. I have enjoyed feeling connected to my friends and family on this site. The love I have felt here has been a lifeline. I feel the time has come to continue whatever writing I do on another platform. I plan to visit and reminisce here as time goes on; I encourage you to as well. I never want to forget how incredible this journey was. Mark will be a part of us all indefinitely. He will remain the love of my life. His love lives on through each of us!
For today, my brain ramblings have made it to print. One of these days I’ll make the jump to writing on something larger than my phone. But for now, the ideas are small enough to fit.
If you’d like to indulge me a read, feel free to visit:
Patients and caregivers love hearing from you; add a comment to show your support.
Help Mark Stay Connected to Family and Friends
A $25 donation to CaringBridge powers a site like Mark's for two weeks. Will you make a gift to help ensure that this site stays online for them and for you?
