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May 26-Jun 01

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Dear Friends,

It is with much sadness that we share with you that Lucy's paternal grandfather, Albert Meyer, passed away on Thursday, Feb 3rd, after over 6 months on hospice with cancer.   Although his race is run, we ask you to pray, once again, for Lucy's.  

Although her body is healthy and well and still shows no signs of cancer (praise the LORD!) apart from some academic regrowth that needs to take place after her brain dealt with so much chemo, the girl inside is still, very much, healing.  This current family crisis is hitting her very hard.  

Lucy finished her treatment in the summer of 2020.  At that point, she daily measured her benchmark of hair regrowth.  Every bit of length brought her closer to what she thought would be "normal."  As her hair grew, we saw her starting to forget her traumatic cancer road.  It's as if she was trying to seal it off so that her past couldn't affect her present.   Then, in January 2021, Al was diagnosed with cancer.   Their relationship became even more special, as she was an inspiration to him as he fought.  

It was difficult for Lucy to watch her Oupa go through chemo and radiation.   It's a very long, very sad story, but suffice it to say that Al finished his complete treatment and graduated chemo only to find out that it did not inhibit the growth of his cancer, and it had taken a toll on his own body.  He was declared terminal in August, shortly before she went through another round of her scans to check for recurrence of her cancer.  

We started seeing signs that Lucy was not ok after he was declared terminal.  Here, she would watch him die of the very condition for which she still gets regular scans.  She started struggling with angry outbursts at school.  (Not like her.)  Then, one day, she had a panic attack at school for which no one could identify a trigger.  I started hunting down a counselor who was equipped to handle a child who experienced childhood cancer.  It took several weeks of diligent phone calling, and then the Lord answered prayer and provided someone.  Not only is the counselor equipped to handle Lucy's situation, but she accepts our insurance!  Lucy has been working with this counselor for a few months, now.  They have been preparing for Oupa's death and processing what happened to Lucy.   Lucy has had no more angry outbursts at school, and she hasn't had anymore panic attacks, for which I am truly thankful.

But, nothing can fully ready you for the actual event.  Last week, Lucy said goodbye to Al while he was still strong enough to talk.  She had to go twice, because the first time she was unable to bring herself to do it.  She just cried with him.  But, a good friend who also happens to be her gym teacher could tell Lucy was not ok the day after her first visit, and she was able to share with Lucy how she wished she had tried again to say goodbye after having the same experience saying goodbye to her father as a child.  Lucy heard her and went back the next day to tell him goodbye and that she loved him.   

After she said goodbye, her first words every morning and her first words after school every day were "Is Oupa still with us?"  She had such expectation when she would ask, and you could see the relief take over her whole body when I would tell her that he was.  But, then on Thursday, I couldn't relieve her.  She's had plenty of times where she seems ok, but she is not herself.  She had her final basketball game, and she practically gave up after halftime.  She didn't want to stay and say goodbye to her teammates.  

I took her to an incredible Valentine's Day party last night at Sassy and Sweet (think a little girls' beauty parlor) and she got her hair done and rode in a limo.  But, my little Lucy was clingy and could hardly smile.  She was very glad to have gone, but there was a great shadow over her.

I know that Lucy has made the connection between her Oupa's cancer and her own.  At dinner the other night, she said grace and thanked God again for sparing her life from cancer, since she knows he could have easily let it be her own death.

The funeral is Friday at 1pm with a private interment to follow.  Thankfully, it is at our home church, Trinity Presbyterian.  But, Lucy is very worried about the service.  She wants me to walk her through every step of what is going to happen so that she is ready.   Understandably, she feels very out-of-control.

So, I write to you asking that you would, once again, pray for my little Lucy.  Please pray that the Lord would help her to process all that she is going through in her 9-year-old mind and heart.  Please pray that she could receive the peace and comfort that we are promised through the hope of the Gospel of Jesus!

"Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. " -2 CORINTHIANS 1:3-4 

Sincerely,

Mary, for all the Meyers

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