Today is hard. Not physically, emotionally. I can spend most days pretending to be ok and normal. But days like today, I can't pretend.

I am tired. Physically, emotionally and spiritually tired. I feel trashed.

I started the injections to get my radiation on Wednesday. That was fairly easy. But it reminds me that I am dealing with cancer in my own being. It reminds me that despite being cared for, this is a solo journey. It reminds me that I still try to cope with hard things using simple carbs. 

So, as I search the house for low iodine diet safe Nutter Butters in the pantry, I try to stop, breathe and simply experience my feelings. Feelings I keep bottled up all weekend, most weekends, and try to honor the space my heart and brain are in today in this moment.

May my sloth make it through the next two work days, the next 2 treatments, and the following week of isolation in my hobbit-hole as I "glow" to kill cancer inside of my body.