Katelyn’s Story

Site created on December 26, 2021

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Journal entry by Katelyn McNamara

   A Time To Be Grateful,

 

Happy Thanksgiving! I hope this message finds you with those you love, eating something delicious.

Ok I’m only a few days late on this post. I sat down to my laptop on Thanksgiving morning, but it wasn’t but a few minutes before I was called to help with food prep. What a pleasure to be in the kitchen with my sister, making breakfast and preparing for the tradition of having the house filled with voices, laughter and calorie-laden food. Food that didn’t taste metallic. That wasn’t made to improve my hemoglobin levels or clear my liver faster. Just rich, delicious dishes brought as a contribution for all to share. What an incredible gift to be able to enjoy a meal together.

(We had family members that could not make it to Thanksgiving this year, held at home by illness or school deadlines. They were so missed and I’m so sorry to be sharing these thoughts of the delightful spread when you all weren’t able to make it, I still hope you had a peaceful day.)

Before jumping into the kitchen, before sitting down to my laptop, I had taken an early morning walk with Daisy, something that had been an important part of my routine during cancer treatment (a way to take time to reflect while simultaneously giving TUB the finger, like heck it was going to keep me in bed). Yesterday though, it was a walk of gratitude. Soft, peaceful light filtering through the trees. The crunch of leaves underfoot. A smile and Thanksgiving Greeting as I passed other walkers.

I have been so incredibly blessed this year. I feel so fortunate, so lucky to have experienced this year. YES, CANCER SUCKS, however, it also reminded me of the love I have in my life. I was reminded of God’s love, the love of friends, of family and of complete strangers. What a powerful and wonderful gift to be reminded and immersed in that while having to face TUB. I am so grateful.

This year I was also reminded to let go of the Life-Gunk I had been carrying and saw the inner strength I had tucked away all along. To face the diagnosis and say: “Not today Cancer”.

And now, as I return to life, I am so grateful that TUB reminded me how wonderful ‘normal’ is-in all its imperfect glory. To be employed. To have house projects. To have to sweep the floor, and then sweep it again later. To spend time with friends and family without worrying about getting sick. To make coffee in the morning and dinner in the evening. To give candy out to trick-or-treaters. To travel to Maine and Utah. To hike and bask in the beauty of a few National Parks. To plan for the future.

Finally, I am grateful for my family and Jonathan, who sacrificed a normal life this year to keep me safe. I am grateful to my medical team and the Markey Cancer center for their hard work, dedication and kindness throughout this whole mess. I am also grateful for the outpouring of love and support through kind words, gifts, prayers and meals that came from you all, my friends and family.

I am blessed and I am so thankful for this year. For the highs and lows. For the moments of joy, fear and frustration, because in all those moments I turned it over to God.

Are there updates? Yep! I saw Dr. Chait, my oncologist, just a week or so ago. Bloodwork still all looks normal and so the next visit will be another set of scans. That’s how it will be for another year or so, then 3 additional years of check-ups every 6 months. Just to make sure TUB doesn’t decide to show his ugly head again.

So for now? Things are pretty darn amazing. I hope they are for you too. If not, I’m here for you and hang in there, this storm will pass.

 

Hope you all had a beautiful and restful Thanksgiving.

Love always,

Katelyn

#WickedMcNamaraStrong

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