Lots of people asking…How’s Joe? How’s he doing? 

So, college… college, in the best of circumstances, is hard. Keeping up with different professors, different content delivery, different expectations. Then there are the  “feed yourself” and “don’t get locked out of your apartment” goals. 

We dropped Joe off at App State in mid-August. We stayed for about a week and then he had a week on his own to get settled before classes. As with any college drop off, it was filled with last minute runs to the store (office chair, bookcase), the shell game of arranging furniture in a tight space (we should be experts by now) and meeting a new roommate (who’s great!). Joe’s drop off also included a tour of campus to remember where everything is, finding a hiding place for an extra set of keys and putting airtags on EVERYTHING (current count is eight!). We are lucky that Boone has the Watauga Heart and Vascular center and we made an appointment for Joe to establish himself there…just in case.

Even as we left to come home, it seemed there was so much left unfinished. But it felt good. It felt right. We knew this was a leap of faith. A great experiment. 

I won’t lie. The first month was a lot. He and I were on the phone multiple times a day. He needed help navigating the expected (reminders to check email, being on time to classes and appointments) and the unexpected (ear infection and the mattress that was slow to arrive). He has an entourage of people helping him…two therapists, App State mentor, TA tutor, and his friends. Sometimes it feels like too many cooks in the kitchen…too many appointments to remember. One class is going well (open note tests); one class is very difficult (lots of memorization). And through all of this, the cognitive exhaustion is real. My most common text to him is “Are you awake?”...at any time of the day.

But, like many college parents finally realize about their child, he is living his life. He’s shopping, eating, doing laundry, going to class (!) and hanging out with his friends. He hasn’t lost anything for very long and maybe locked himself out once?! About par for a college student, I believe! 

I have to remind myself of how I operated through college. My GPA reflected my preferred activities and I can remember the hard decisions of sleeping in or going to class. And poor Joe…his parents have a front row seat to his college experience. Awesome. But, like everything else, he’s taking it like a champ.

How is he doing? Bottom line is “Great!” I mean, the fact that he’s walking, talking and off on his own is a reality that I am sometimes reminded of at the oddest moments. Most recently when a student at APP State suffered a traumatic brain injury. His parents have been sharing his story and it’s so similar to Joe’s that it took me straight back to a year ago. This young man is recovering along a similar path as Joe and his parents are as grateful and amazed and hopeful as Pete and I were. Grateful for life. Amazed by extremely good medical care. Hopeful for the future.

And, for the first time ever, our nest is empty. And we miss him. For a year he was always upstairs. In his room. Talking to friends. I can remember walking into his empty room shortly after his accident, trying to process what had happened. Wondering…praying. And then so grateful, as his recovery progressed… knowing eventually he’d be tucked safely in his own bed. Back at his desk. At home. With us. Safe.

And now he’s back where he should be. It’s hard. For us. For him. It’s going to take a while. He’s gonna need a lot of help. But he’ll get there. We continue to ask for your prayers as he navigates all he has in front of him.

We hope and pray that all of you who have supported Joe and this family are having a beautiful fall…enjoying the season and are surrounded by the love of friends and family. 

All the best,

Kathy and Pete (both newly certified in First Aid/AED/CPR!!!)

Pictures: Joe and Oliver in Hebron Falls, Boone Fork River & a sentiment found in Blowing Rock