Comes about most nights now. Your alone in the dark thinking about the future which in hospice is just how long your gonna be around, and the places you want to see again before you go  Then the extreme kindness each week I see with people stopping by to take me to lunch golfing, to see a football game brings tears to my eyes every night it happens because each day is getting harder to go out and at anytime I may just be stuck taking pain killers and not able to get out. Everyday my feet get worse so everyday I am closer to the end and just sleeping more and more.

 Then this last Sunday we did brunch downtown with friends at one of our favorite places Roam Cafe. Knowing they get packed on nice Sundays I texted a couple days ahead to make sure we could get a table and not miss out on what is probably my last time to make it there. We enjoy a wonderful brunch with friends the owners wife was our server, we did shots with the owner something I haven’t done in years I’m just enjoying the day with my wife and friends knowing this maybe the last time I get to enjoy brunch at Roam. I give Marie our server my cc so our friends couldn’t pay and the bill comes back totally comped something that was never expected I was there just to make sure I had one more day to enjoy the place. When your in Hospice you don’t know when your going to be in a shape that you cant make it anymore. I cant thank them enough for that kindness.

I have a friend coming from NYC to see me and my wife tells me about friends that will be bringing brunch this weekend and I am just amazed that so many want to see me. Again I LOVE GETTING OUT and seeing all my friends but free lunches and gifts are never expected or solicited. The only thing I ask is when I do pass please check on my family to make sure they are doing ok. I asked Pam If she wants me to haunt her she said no and I said she only has to mourn me 2 weeks then move on.

I gave a talk to a Hospice team based out of Florida and one of the questions was what do I want to be remembered for and it was a simple one word answer KINDNESS we need more of it and I hope I helped bring some to the world.

So please keep coming to take me to lunch but don’t feel obligated to pay,  Stop by the house to chat No gifts are required. It does suck knowing what is going to be your demise and it sucks seeing yourself get worse but I promise only to let the demons chase me at night during the day I will always be my smiling life loving self

Be Kind and Love To All Shuey