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Apr 28-May 04

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Sorry, I guess I’m out of practice creating posts. Again, please forgive me for taking 4 months to fill in the blanks. Mom and I traveled to Wisconsin at the end of June to see friends and family. We had a hellacious trip from FL to MN so were relieved to finally get in our rental and take off for Siren, WI. Traveling up Snelling Ave we both noticed the green beauty and cleanliness of St Paul. I realized how much I had missed the Twin City area. I turned to Mom. I told her that I didn’t want to die alone in FL. She said that she felt the same way. This is not to minimize our very dear friends in Fort Myers whom we miss daily. However, none of our family live in FL, my church and oldest friends are in MN and WI. My cancer diagnosis is not cheery and, let’s face it, we all could go at any time. If either of us were to need extra care it made sense to be in a place where that would be easily available.  So we sold the house, packed up our stuff, waved our magic wand and landed in Roseville completely organized. If only. Selling the house was relatively easy. Packing, organizing, finding a place to move to, actually moving a ton of stuff, not at all easy. During that time and up to the present I have been undergoing chemotherapy, which has come with a multitude of side effects that have made life miserable. We were lucky to find a 55+ apartment in Roseville. A good central location. I also found an oncologist to transfer to quickly. Our possessions took 4 weeks and 4 vans to arrive in Roseville. Don’t ever use Colonial Van Lines. Ever. We are still unpacking and if it weren’t for my brothers, sisters, nieces and nephews the chaos would be increased by 1000. My mom’s a trooper. She and our little dog, Raffi, have gritted their teeth and taken all the lunacy in stride. I’ve been the big baby. Of course, any nitwit that packs up and moves cross-country while in the midst of cancer treatment needs their head examined. I have felt so helpless at times and have cried myself to sleep more times than I can count. I know that this,too, shall pass. How about now, God? It’s hard for me to ask for help, which is why many of you haven’t heard from me. I need help and most especially, encouragement, right now. Some of you have been faithful in staying in touch even though you have gotten nothing back from me. There’s a weird sense of loneliness involved, too. I don’t always relate to where I am. Perhaps that’s due to the chemicals in my body that are fighting the cancer. Anyway, I have faith that I am in the Arms of the Saviour and eventually I will see clearly what I am supposed to see. In the meantime, thank you for your prayers. I am so blessed to have such wonderful friends. Hoping that next time you hear from me I will be a lot more cheerful!

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