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May 05-11

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On December 21st I was diagnosed with follicular lymphoma. Follicular lymphoma is Non-Hodgkin B-cell-family. I then had a doctors appointment with an oncologist on the January 11th that got me confused with another patient, and gave me false hope. I had 21 questions to ask and never even got one question answered. Was in complete disbelief, my sister called the social worker that next day and she was able to straighten things out, thank goodness for sisters ♥️ Then had a bone marrow biopsy done, at the same hospital my mom had her biopsy and because of COVID-19 had to walk through the entire process alone. Sat in the same lobby as I awaited the same test for my mom alone. As I laid on the table and heard a drill, that drilled the bone out of my back, in that moment was in complete shock, like I thought I was in shock before nope, in that moment was trying to escape what was heading my way. I knew in that breath something bigger was coming. I meet with an oncologist in Medford and that same day received my results from my bone marrow biopsy but had no idea how to read the pathology report, for some reason meeting this oncologist was different, I was so nervous. She without any knowledge of the biopsy was on bored with aggressive treatment, then in that moment read the biopsy results, STAGE 4 CANCER 😳 because the cancer is now in the bone. Wait what does that have to do with anything? Blah, blah, blah was all I heard, that and pet scan because that’s the scan that they really need bc we need to see if it’s spread to other parts of my body? Wait isn’t the piece of bone you just dug out of my back enough? Of course not, I understand it’s to see how much more chemotherapy and radiation I will need. So we are here now awaiting the pet scan to see if I get to keep my hair, a little of my dignity. So Thursday we get the scan, meet with the head honcho at the oncology department here in Corvallis for another opinion, then meet with the oncologist in Medford on the 5th to decide on what exact treatment to do. Today was by far my hardest day. I was alone and just cried most of the day. I know it’s good for me, but who wants to cry. I never even know if I am actually breathing correctly who wants to cry. I don’t even know what would happen if I didn’t have Jehovah and my sister the boys. Well that’s all I know, hopefully Marcy will add all the important details ♥️

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