Journal entry by Leslie Gerber —
I've started to write a new entry maybe a dozen times in the last few months, but the words just never came. But after running into a childhood friend that I haven't seen in years, I realized that those of you who read this truly want to know an update on this journey...so here you go.
I finished my last round of chemo (#6) on December 16, just in time to for Christmas Break! It was a normal post chemo with some pretty extreme fatigue but my great school made it easy for me to take a couple of extra days off for some much needed rest. We made it through a very quiet Christmas, it's amazing what trauma can do to humble the hustle bustle of the Christmas season. The feeling of knowing this was the last round helped me find some inner strength and push to get my energy back. I started to do my own laundry, cleaned parts of my house I hadn't touched in months and could be up on my feet in the evenings, something I hadn't done much of since chemo started in September. Just as I was starting to feel like maybe I could get back to "normal" I got hit with a sinus infection that rocked my world. Two weeks, antibiotics, a swollen eye lid, and lots of tears later, once again I was trying to find my normal. And then the break was over.
We all started back to school and it's a great feeling to be able to teach a full week without the anticipation of the next chemo treatment. I've continued to coach basketball this winter and while I haven't always felt good, sometimes so bad I can't make it to school, I always find the energy to be with my team. They lift me up in ways I can't even explain.
In January, I also started my next round of "treatment". While the chemo is done, eliminating the chances of getting cancer again is a high priority for my oncologist. The surgery and chemo killed what he describes as the fast acting cancer cells. So now I go to the cancer center once a month for a shot of Zoladex, a very large shot, the kind that takes a shot before the shot. I believe Joel described it as 10 gauge needle. This monthly shot (and a daily pill called Tomaxafin) will be my new treatment plan for the next 5 years. These are used to kill what they call the "lazy" cancer cells. The side effects are quite minimal and so far a few hot flashes have been the worst of it. We can only trust and pray that this is the best method to keep us from going through this again.
If you see me, you will notice a significant change in my bald head. And while I still get lots of stares from 5 and 6 year olds, my hair is starting to grow back, slowly but surely. It's long enough that it is soft to the touch; and my kids, niece and husband all enjoy rubbing it. I am excited for my first trip back to my hairdresser!
The "normal" is coming. I don't quite feel like I'm there yet, but have lots of people tell me they can see it in my eyes. Thank you all for the continued love, check ins and cards. Every word, note and donation are greatly cherished and mean so much to us. There are days that I have to go back to those cards and kind words when I'm just not sure how we are going to make it through the week.
"Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise."
Our love to you all.
Leslie
I finished my last round of chemo (#6) on December 16, just in time to for Christmas Break! It was a normal post chemo with some pretty extreme fatigue but my great school made it easy for me to take a couple of extra days off for some much needed rest. We made it through a very quiet Christmas, it's amazing what trauma can do to humble the hustle bustle of the Christmas season. The feeling of knowing this was the last round helped me find some inner strength and push to get my energy back. I started to do my own laundry, cleaned parts of my house I hadn't touched in months and could be up on my feet in the evenings, something I hadn't done much of since chemo started in September. Just as I was starting to feel like maybe I could get back to "normal" I got hit with a sinus infection that rocked my world. Two weeks, antibiotics, a swollen eye lid, and lots of tears later, once again I was trying to find my normal. And then the break was over.
We all started back to school and it's a great feeling to be able to teach a full week without the anticipation of the next chemo treatment. I've continued to coach basketball this winter and while I haven't always felt good, sometimes so bad I can't make it to school, I always find the energy to be with my team. They lift me up in ways I can't even explain.
In January, I also started my next round of "treatment". While the chemo is done, eliminating the chances of getting cancer again is a high priority for my oncologist. The surgery and chemo killed what he describes as the fast acting cancer cells. So now I go to the cancer center once a month for a shot of Zoladex, a very large shot, the kind that takes a shot before the shot. I believe Joel described it as 10 gauge needle. This monthly shot (and a daily pill called Tomaxafin) will be my new treatment plan for the next 5 years. These are used to kill what they call the "lazy" cancer cells. The side effects are quite minimal and so far a few hot flashes have been the worst of it. We can only trust and pray that this is the best method to keep us from going through this again.
If you see me, you will notice a significant change in my bald head. And while I still get lots of stares from 5 and 6 year olds, my hair is starting to grow back, slowly but surely. It's long enough that it is soft to the touch; and my kids, niece and husband all enjoy rubbing it. I am excited for my first trip back to my hairdresser!
The "normal" is coming. I don't quite feel like I'm there yet, but have lots of people tell me they can see it in my eyes. Thank you all for the continued love, check ins and cards. Every word, note and donation are greatly cherished and mean so much to us. There are days that I have to go back to those cards and kind words when I'm just not sure how we are going to make it through the week.
"Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise."
Our love to you all.
Leslie
Patients and caregivers love hearing from you; add a comment to show your support.
Help Leslie Stay Connected to Family and Friends
A $25 donation to CaringBridge powers a site like Leslie's for two weeks. Will you make a gift to help ensure that this site stays online for them and for you?
