I've been trying to piece the words together for an update to you all since yesterday. It's not the news we were hoping for and that has been super discouraging. 

We sat through the scan and then waited on the doctor. We were both cautiously optimistic that we would see the improvement on Evan's heart function, but it still remains the same. Not the news we were praying and hoping for at all. The doctor shared with us that since Evan shows signs of being a little dizzy for a few minutes after he takes one of the newer medications, we are going to go in on May 20th to monitor his blood pressure after taking his morning meds. That will determine if we bump up Enestro one more time or if we have reached the limit Evan's body and blood pressure can handle. There's still the possibility that it could help improve his function, but because it hasn't shown much of anything, the doctor says that he has become more and more swayed into realizing it's not doing what we had hoped for... I honestly shared that we are discouraged with the lack of progress, but trust that God has Evan and that we are in the best hands medically which is one of the main reasons we moved back to Tennessee in the first place. 

The most asked question we get is how is Evan doing? The short answer, really good. Clinically, he's doing super awesome! His appetite was not great a few weeks ago, but he's back to himself finally and eating great. The boy loves playing with friends, outside and inside with his toys. We are really proud of our sweet boy who knows no stranger. :)

We are really grateful that Evan lives his little life blissfully ignorant of the severity of his heart issues. He beautifully displays peaceful joy and a smile for everyone (especially the extremely introverted kids at the playground). A good friend back in WA once shared some words from another heart mamma she knows..."you feel like your floating and then you get pulled under water..." Right now we all feel pulled under. We could use encouragement and a win. We still (and always will) trust God and that He has a perfect plan, but having a child with a very real and scary diagnosis that happens to be incurable outside of a miracle brings all kinds of emotions and trials daily. 

Next question we have been getting: "what can I do?" You can still pray for us. Just because we aren't getting the answers we are hoping for doesn't mean God isn't there nor does it mean that He cares less or less real. He has Evan's perfect body in His hands and we know that He still has great plans. 

Here's how you can pray:

1. Pray for God's will to be done. No matter what. This is how I am praying and I want that to be our prayer in unison because His will is perfect and I want every breath we breathe to bring glory to God.

2. Patience and peace as we journey from doctor visit to doctor visit. Please pray for encouragement at each visit.

3. Sustained strength. Chris and I are both working among all of this and it's exhausting in what we both do for our jobs. 

4. Pray for Cayden, Evan's baby brother. That God can already prepare him to be an encourager for his big brother and sustain all of the caretakers who take him in when we are up at the hospital.

5. Peace in whatever path we are supposed to walk for Evan's heart.

Thank you all for journeying with us. I know it's not the update we wanted, but God still has this even when our hearts feel heavy with unfair things--He still has good things for us.