I was really stuck in my head today, well actually for the last few days in anticipation of getting through today. Today marks the completion of a full year since Dad and Kara finished their days of labor and toil, and went to be with our heavenly Father.  Today was a tough day, but I have more to do tomorrow, and that's Ok. I thought about going back and reading the journalling I wrote last year, but thought it best that I do that on a different day. Maybe next week, maybe not.

I clearly remember the events of this day a year ago. But I needed to remember where to get my strength and calm from. I needed to remember not to worry about tomorrow, but be fully present and aware of the current moment. You ARE here now, so BE here now...pay attention Dan, listen, you need to remember this.

I cannot imagine how hard this day was for Mom, and Katherine and I spent the whole day with her. I could see the anguish in her face at times (and Katherine's), and there were some tears throughout the day, but like the ocean, what goes on under the surface is many multiples of factors of what we can see on the surface. The good thing was we got to have a few laughs too.

I once read something by Timothy Gallway that talked about the rose.

"Life sprouts up from death, like the seed planted in fertile soil. 

When we plant a rose seed, we notice it is small, but we do not criticize it as "rootless and stem-less." We treat it as a seed, giving it the water and nourishment required of a seed.

 When it first shoots up out of the earth, we don't condemn it as immature and underdeveloped; we do not criticize the buds for not being open when they appear. We stand in wonder at the process taking place, and give the plant the care it needs at each stage of development.

 The rose is a rose from the time it is a seed to the time it dies. Within it, at all times, it contains its whole potential. It seems to be constantly in the process of change: Yet at each stage, at each moment, it is perfectly all right just as it is.

 A flower is not better when it blooms than when it is merely a bud; at each stage it is the same thing...A flower in the process of expressing its potential.”

Hey Dan, remember......

We are not defined by what struggles or problems we have, but by how we handle them-by who we are through them, and we are Christ’s. He gives us life and breath. Christ is our Living water, our Light of the world. His word, the food for our soul. The arrogance and vanity of self importance must die away for Christ’s sake. Literally.

Lord, help us to step outside of our pain, to drop our sorrows. Help us to see that because of Your love for us, Your sacrifice on the cross and resurrection, we are given eternal life through Your forgiveness and grace. What a beautiful gift.

You love us just as we are. All of us, right where we are, for who we are, every step of the way as we grow into who we are going to be. We are Your seeds, watered and nourished by You, unfinished and immature, but with all the potential to truly live life to the fullest measure as You intended. Not because of fancy things or wealth. Not because of poverty or shortcomings, Not because of good deeds or mistakes, or what we do for a living. Not the clothes we wear, or the car we drive, but precisely because of Your love and sacrifice for us, and our choice to accept You into our lives as Lord and Savior. Thank You!

Lord, we thank You for the nourishment of our souls, our minds, and our bodies. In all things Lord, let Your will for us be done.

Hey Dan, remember that we all have good days and bad days. We all have memories of great times and times that were deeply painful and disappointing.

Help us Lord to keep looking forward to each new moment as if it were our last moment on earth. Help us to embrace our labors and enjoy our times of rest. Help us to be patient and persevere through the rains of hardship, as we wait for the plenty of the harvest.

Help us to not be double minded, living in the present, but longing for the things and times of the past, not seeing the potential of the future. Like the rose, we are in a process, but fully Yours. Help us to look to You. 

With hopeful hearts we look forward to our journey to come. We have no idea what tomorrow brings, and we know we are only here for a short time, so help us focus on today, right now, this very moment. If what comes next is Your will for us,  let it be done fully for Your glory. 

Forgive us for not giving You enough credit to know just how much tragedy we can handle, how much loss we can overcome, or how much suffering we can endure. We also cannot fathom the overwhelming Joy that awaits us all when we come to be in Your presence. All of it refining who we are. Help us to simply trust in You and the path you have laid out for each one of us to follow. 

You tell us so many times not to fear, for You are here with us. Forgive us for getting sidetracked and overwhelmed by the distractions. There are so many things that interfere with our ability to trust in You. Not only our own pain and suffering, but that of people we know and love, and the people we read about all over the world that are suffering in one way or another.  Give us the quiet time we need to focus.

Remind us that the answers we seek are not always going to be what we expected. That sometimes the story of Your truth is told to others through faithful people enduring a hardship, and sometimes that hardship is our own to claim and endure faithfully.

Remind us that there are things we can do, but we cannot do everything, nor can we do it all by ourselves. That we can step up to be a part of the answer for some things or someone,  but we don’t have all the answers, that we can’t solve every problem. When those times come, remind us to leave the latter to You Lord!

Give us the wisdom to know when we are able to do something physically, and push us to do it. When to support others in prayer, and that only You can make those miracles happen when it is Your will to do so. 

Remind us that You are the one in whom our hope is found. That we can rely on You for our strength, safety, peace, and comfort. That You are always with us.  Your grace is enough. Your love is boundless.

Life is good and it is only going to get better! Rejoice and be glad in it!

Hey thanks for the reminder Lord, I really needed that!