Donald’s Story

Site created on October 13, 2020

Welcome to our CaringBridge website. We are using it to keep family and friends updated in one place. We appreciate your support and words of hope and encouragement. Thank you for visiting.

For those of you that may not know, Don is a two-time cancer survivor: prostate cancer in 2006, GIST (stomach)  in 2008, and removal of suspicious growth in breast in 2016. In early September 2020, Don felt like he had a pin pricked on his left side. After a week, it turned into a stabbing pain. He called his GP and they were able to see him on Friday 9/11. The PA ordered a CT Scan STAT that day, and Dr. Riccione (GP) called that evening to say that there was a mass on the pancreas. He ordered a PET Scan, which was requested from Windsong on Wednesday 9/16 to check for malignancy.

At this point, Don called his Oncologist Dr. George (prostate) at Roswell to let him know that a mass was found on the pancreas and a PET Scan was being done  at Windsong on Monday 9/21. We met with Dr. George on Wednesday 9/23 when we were told that it had metastasized to the liver, and it was terminal. He ordered a biopsy of the liver, which Don had done on  Wednesday 9/30. All seven (7) samples from the liver had cancer. At this point, we decided to stop the medications/injections for the prostate cancer,  We made this decision because continuing the prostate treatment would be moot, along with the possibility of becoming eligible for a clinical trial for the pancreatic cancer. Don would not be eligible for this clinical trial had he continued his prostate protocol.

On Monday 10/5 we met with Dr. Christos Fountzilas as our new Oncologist for the pancreatic cancer. He gave us a timeline of having no chemo to be 6 months to a year. With chemo, Don may get 3 months to a year additional - no guarantees, everyone is different. He said that no surgical procedure could be done because the cancer had metastasized to the liver. We were offered one of two sets of chemo drugs. and somewhere during our journey Don would be taking both sets of drugs, one after another. Dr. Christos talked about the side-effects: nausea, fatigue, loss of hair, and neuropathy - again, everyone is different. Sets of drugs are:
Set A - two drugs, 1 hr. infusion once a week for three weeks, then a week off; then three weeks on and one week off; etc.
Set B - three drugs, #1 - 2 hr. infusion, #2 - 2 hr. infusion, #3 - 1 hr. infusion witha fanny pack going home for another 48 hrs, and a nurse would come to disconnect it.  This procedure would be twice a month.

We opted for Set A - mainly to start easy (hopefully) and because Set B had some digestive issues which we did not want to deal with at this time.

So from September 11th to October 12th, only a month...such a short time... our lives have been turned upside down and inside out (a 70's song??)  One thing we think about is that in January 2018 Dr. George and Don decided not to continue the yearly CT Scans that Don had for the past 13 years, radioactive processes being a big reason, and nothing had shown for the last  11 of 13 years. So they decided for the next CT Scan to be January 2020. However, Don's cardiologist wanted a CT Scan for a problem with his aorta, so his last scan was April 2019. Nothing showed up then, so the pancreatic cancer is something new, over the past 18 months, but they cannot say when it started.

Don is having a PORT put in tomorrow (Wednesday 10/14) to help facilitate the infusiions.

We have scheduled infusions on Tuesdays (10/13-10/20-10/27 and 11/10-11/17-11/24). More will be added.

At this point we ask for PRAYER first and foremost for a MIRACLE, if it is His will, secondarily to be part of the 5% that make it to 5 years, and if not, for quality time in whatever years are left. We also ask to pray for peace of mind for Don and Deb and their families, prayer for the doctors who are reading the  reports and God's Guiding Hand to make the right decisions. We are praying for YOU, for those hearing this for the first time, possibly feeling the same shock we did when we got the news. 

This site may not be updated daily, as things may not happen or change or progress right now. Love to all!

Newest Update

Journal entry by Deborah Bartus

BARTUS - Donald J.

March 8, 1957 – June 24, 2021, after a 15- year battle with cancers, most recently pancreatic cancer. Amongst other interests, Don was into genealogy and designed his obituary to be helpful to future researchers. Don met his “LOML”, “LOVE OF MY LIFE” and Soulmate, Deborah Ann Spychaj Conway, on September 28, 2003. They often frequented “their Tim Horton’s” on Southwestern Blvd., where they first met for coffee that day after finding each other on the Meeting Place singles section of the Buffalo News. They were married on March 7, 2004 on the sands of LimeTree Beach, St. Thomas, U.S. Virgin Islands while on a Caribbean cruise. Together, they had no children, but enjoyed parenting their children from previous marriages. Don was the cherished “Popsicle” to Nicole Barbara Bartus, and Dziadzia to her daughter, Brynn Autumn Bartus; he was the loving “Padre” to Brianna Rose Bartus, and the dear and devoted “Poppyseed” to Erik Louis Bartus (Katie, nee Casey), and Dziadzia to their son Erik Louis Bartus, Jr. He is also survived by their mother, the former Susan Ruth Zientek who he married September 15, 1978; their marriage ended in 2002. Don was also the caring stepfather of Kevin Michael Conway (Leslie, nee Smith), and Dziadzia to their children Chase Henry and Ella Mary. He loved and cherished all four children and their spouses equally and completely. He lived for his grandchildren and would light up each time he saw them. Don is survived by his dearest loving sister, friend, and confidant, Barbara Ann Bartus (Brian Pettitt, loved like a brother), and his cherished sister-in-law whom he considered another sister, Lorraine (nee Jaworski) Bartus. Don was predeceased by his loving and “significantly older” brother who he teased mercilessly, Louis Joseph Bartus. Additionally, he is survived by his special brothers-in-law (Swagiers) and their wives, Kenneth Jon (Barbara, nee Chmielewski) Simmons and Marvin Eugene (Cheryl Masaitis, nee Starr, and the late Patricia, nee Thuerauf) Spychaj. Don was blessed with siblings-in-law he considered to be his own siblings. He was especially close to his caring and devoted cousin, Denise Jacqueline Daniels, with whom he lived for a short while and considered a sister. Also surviving him are his much loved nephews and nieces: Stephen (Kathleen, nee Murphy) Bartus with their children Mackenzie (Don’s Godson) and Olivia; Daniel Sr. (Mary Lou, nee Carosa) Bartus with their children Daniel Jr. (Chaman, nee Saran) and Louis F. Bartus; Susan Kamuda (nee Bartus) with her son Broderick “Brody” Kamuda; Mark Simmons (Aja Flores) with their children Brayden, Kyler (Don’s Godson), Trystan, Caysen, and Maddex. Also step-nieces and step-nephew: Christen, Jennifer, and Joseph Masaitis; Charity (Jake) Ries. Each and every one of his cousins held a very special place in his heart, including his wife’s cousins who he got to know at the Trzcinski Family Picnics. Don is survived by Deb’s Aunt, his dear Ciocia Florence Antkowiak. All his aunts and uncles have predeceased him, including his loving Godparents, Walter Mytko and Josephine Daniels. The best parents in the world passed before him, Louis John August 11, 1916- February 16, 1978, and Czeslawa “Alice” (nee Sobon) May 13, 1919-February 11, 1985 Bartus; Henry Casimir (“Skippy”) May 14, 1919-December 25, 1991 and Alicia Mary (nee Trzcinski) November 21, 1919-October 19, 2017 Spychaj; his parents-in-law, also predeceased him. Also gone before him are his paternal grandparents Anthony (Johanna, nee Wrobel) Bartus, and his maternal grandparents Martin (Rozalia, nee Moskal) Sobon. Anthony’s parents were Maciej (Ann, nee Momot) Bartus, and Johanna’s were Joseph (Mary) Wrobel. Martin’s parents were John (Katarzyna, nee Ciesla) Sobon, and Rozalia’s were Jan (Marianna, nee Krawczyk) Moskal. Don’s incredible knowledge of family genealogy will hopefully be passed on to future generations. Don had worked in the restaurant and accounting fields for years, and ended his career working 10 years as a mailman mainly at the Eastside Station in Buffalo, where he also served as acting supervisor for a period of time. He retired in 2008 after his second cancer prevented him from returning to work. Don had also worked at Buddy’s Subs, Rafael’s, Santora’s, Seven Corners Restaurant, Andy’s Lounge, US Energy, Goldome Agency, Goetz Energy, New England Life, and Bella Pizza. Don also sold WATKINS PRODUCTS since 1988, and AVON PRODUCTS since 2001, earning President’s Club ranking for many years. He loved God’s creation and often marveled at minute bits of beauty others might miss... rainbows, sparkling snowflakes, or a dewdrop on a rosebud. He had the greenest thumb this side of heaven. He blessed this world with laughter and wisdom. He loved and was loved by many and enjoyed spending time with family and friends. When you met Don, you became a friend for life. Most people were at times the recipient of one of his gifts of food or thoughtful greeting card. He never seemed to miss a “milestone event.” Although he didn’t remember his Grandma Sobon, her spirit lived within him; everyone told him he was just like her because he always sent food to those who were sick or in need. Don enjoyed cooking and baking and there wasn’t a meal of any ethnicity or any dessert he could not master. He was a member of the St. Philip the Apostle Bereavement Singers and a monthly Bingo caller, along with his equally talented wife who could call back numbers almost as well as Don. At the Watermark Wesleyan Church, he was a member of the St. Stephen’s Ministry, and a co-Usher with Deb at the 930 am Sunday Service. A Lackawanna Boy, he will be missed as a caring father and Dziadzia, devoted and loving husband, precious and caring brother and brother-in-law, special cousin and nephew, spiritual leader, and friend. He had a kind, sweet spirit, treating others as he would want to be treated. He always thought of others before himself. He believed his calling in life was to serve and he exemplified servitude. He always tried to do what Jesus would do. People have called out his gentleness, empathy, and near-constant smile. He made lifelong friends, touched the lives of many, and was genuine. May he be at peace with meeting his Lord and Savior, and celebrate a new life with family and friends who went before him. The family will be present to receive relatives and friends at the LOMBARDO FUNERAL HOME (Southtowns Chapel), 3060 Abbott Rd., near Lake Ave., on Sunday, June 27th from 12 Noon-6 PM and on Monday June 28th from 2-8 PM. A Mass of Christian Burial will be held Wednesday, June 30th in St. Philip the Apostle Church, 950 Losson Rd., Cheektowaga, at 10 AM. A Memorial Service will be held Thursday, July 1st in Watermark Wesleyan Church, 4999 McKinley Pkwy, Hamburg, at 1:30 PM. Donations can be made to: Family Life Network, PO Box 506, Bath NY 14810; St. Philip the Apostle Church, 950 Losson Rd., Cheektowaga NY 14225; Watermark Wesleyan Church, 4999 McKinley Pkwy., Hamburg NY 14075; Roswell Park, PO Box 631, Buffalo NY 14240; Hospice Foundation, PO Box 590, Buffalo NY 14240. Flowers respectively declined.

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