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Jun 09-15

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I’m still a little clumsy at making this site work for me, but here is an update on my condition and treatment.
This previous Monday I received my last scheduled chemo therapy and radiation is the next step.  I have been resigned to modest goals for the chemo, or as my oncologist says, “I can’t cure you, but we can aim for extension of life and increased quality of life.”  I have been seeking to make St. Paul’s words my own when he said, “for me to live is Christ, and to die is gain.”
However when I met with my radiologist he says, “our goal is to get you to surgery.”  In other words the pancreatic tumor which is diagnosed as “non-resectable” may become reduced and perhaps disentangled to the point that it becomes “resectable.”  I think these are rather long odds and am reluctant to grasp a forlorn hope which will probably prove disappointing.  I asked my radiologist if the fact that there was as yet no evidence of metastases was a factor in his assessment and he said, perhaps a little grimly, that if there were any metastases  “we wouldn’t be having this conversation.  If the intent of his optimism is merely to energize my will for the treatments to follow, I’m fine with that – a prospect of a cure is surely worth the effort regardless of the odds.  In any event, I am at peace with my life and actually rather excited about the freedom I am enjoying, being finally fully retired from work, and able to participate more fully in several Bible studies (3 currently) as well as a group organized to discuss First Things magazine. 
My radiation starts March 8 and will continue for 45 sessions, at least that is the goal.  Five times a week, M-F, with the addition of a milder chemo which I take in tablet form (6/day.)  The sessions are brief compared to the chemo infusions, and I can drive myself there and back.  
From what I understand, surgery is not necessarily a light at the end of the tunnel.  I am told that it is a tricky, rather difficult operation, would be performed by a specialist at UVA and not at MJ where I am currently receiving treatment.
I want to thank all who have expressed concerns and prayers.  I hope to be on the tennis courts again before long (wretched weather the main impediment along with my reduced tolerance for cold..)  If you end up on the other side of the net from me, don’t back off, and perhaps more importantly don’t feel cheated if every now and then I crack a winner.  And if you are my partner in doubles, console yourself with the thought that it is probably only one set after all.
Blessings
Bob

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