Dear family and friends, Some of you may know that Barbara fell in January of this year in her apartment. She broke her collarbone and she had a brain bleed. She was in the hospital and then rehabilitation for awhile as her kids tried to figure out the next step for her. There was no way she could live by herself anymore. Sara found a great little personal care home where Barbara could live until she could make a decision about what to do next. While living in the personal care home (with only 8 other residents and round the clock care) was a huge shift for Barbara, it did give her some peace of mind to know that someone was always there. All she had to do was call for help if she needed it. Barbara pushed herself with physical therapy and continued to improve. It took her a few months, but she began to walk with her hemi-walker with some help. She was beginning to act like her old self again by creating a sense of community in the home she was in. She organized the other residents to play games with her, and she often advocated on their behalf. She enjoyed the company of the other residents and she fell in love with the owner, who is very hands-on. At this time, she realized that she couldn't live on her own anymore and gave up her apartment. Then in May, after she had been walking with the hemi-walker more independently (but with someone still beside her just in case), and even climbed the stairs at Sara's house, she fell again. She tried to walk all on her own without her walker to reach her walker, and it didn't end well. She broke her pelvis and tailbone. The broken bones, however, were not discovered until she had been in excruciating pain for almost 2 weeks before she went to the E.R. again, and they could see the broken bones. When she originally had an ex-ray done after her fall, the doctors couldn't see the breaks. Barbara then had surgery to install a plate and screw to attach it to her tailbone. Her whole frame had been off-kilter. This surgery took a lot out of her, and she has been struggling to recover ever since. She had not been able to put any weight on her feet until just a couple of weeks ago. She had to be moved with 2 people lifting her from her bed to a chair and vice versa. She couldn't do transfers. This meant that she couldn't do any physical therapy. So she had to play the waiting game while the screws adhered to her bones and healed, which took much longer than the doctors predicted. You can imagine the toll that being bed-bound and chair-bound, and completely dependent on others has taken on her. She has always been so independent and active. She became super anxious and she is on some anti-anxiety medication to help. Since she can now put weight on both feet, she has been receiving physical and occupational therapy. It's unclear how much Barbara is benefiting from these therapies, since she has declined cognitively. She can't even feed herself these days. Her fine motor skills have deteriorated significantly. She has a difficult time having a conversation, playing games, reading and/or listening to books - all things she has relished before now. She is a shadow of her former self. This being said, she is lovingly being cared for at the personal care home. It's a beautiful home; the other residents love her and are quite concerned about her. Barbara's kids are quite involved with visits everyday, coordinating doctor's appointments, filling her prescriptions, hashing things out with the insurance companies - all the while working full-time jobs. Martay and I visited for a week in July; just before, her nephew also paid her a visit. Please know that Barbara's kids are doing everything they can to get Barbara the help she needs. Just last week, Sara took her mom to her primary care doctor and she was shocked at Barbara's deterioration since she last saw her. She sent them to the emergency room to make sure Barbara didn't have another stroke. She did not, and her blood work came back normal. Sara is following up with the doctor to see about adjusting Barbara's medications and to get a referral to a neurologist. As you can see, Barbara is struggling as is her family to figure out what's going on. We appreciate your thoughts and prayers at this difficult time. While Barbara has had a few visitors, the visits cause her a great deal of stress and anxiety. She also has a difficult time talking on the phone. She enjoys receiving cards and notes. Here is the address of the place she is living:
Barbara Roggow c/o Golden Age Personal Care Home 1399 Harris Road Lawrenceville, Georgia 30043
Just checking in to let you all know that things haven't changed much. Mom is healthy and well taken care of. I'm planning on taking lunch over for her and the other ladies on her birthday this year. Normally I can choose a meal quite easily for her but her taste buds have changed in the last couple of years so I'm having to brainstorm something a little more senior friendly. It seems that we all like the carbs the older we get! We are being allowed to celebrate with her albeit on the veranda out back with masks, but it will be nice to be together again. Fingers crossed it wont be too overwhelming! I've included one of Amanda's weekly reports so you can get a glimpse into her world. Thank you all for the messages and positive vibes coming our way. I at least can say she does not feel abandoned in this new phase of life, it keeps us both as positive as possible!
Week 84
My Time with Barbara
Monday 4/19/21
Today was a pretty good day. She was able to give one-word answers to my questions when I first got there. That told me she was able to understand what I was asking. We read a book and she listened, but did not help read. We had a nice chat with her sisters and she did pretty good participating. She did get sleepy near the end. When it was time for me to leave, she was falling asleep so I told her to take a little nap.
Wednesday 4/21/21
She was pretty alert when I got there. I asked if she would like to listen to some music, but she said no. I asked if she wanted to read a book and she said no again. I then asked if she wanted to take a little nap and she said yes. She took about a 15-minute nap and I rubbed her arm and brushed her hair while she slept. When she woke up, we watched I Love Lucy, I asked her some questions throughout the show to see if she was following along with the story and her answers told me she was.
Friday 4/23/21
She was awake and alert when I got there. She said hello first. It’s always nice to hear her greet me first. I asked about her day and she said it was pretty good. She did have trouble telling me about mealtime. She couldn’t answer if she enjoyed lunch. We read a quick book and she did a good job answering the questions I asked. She was able to identify the animals I asked about. She was also able to tell me that she thought the bunny rabbit was cute. Towards the end of my visit, she started to get tired, so we had some quiet time and watched the sitcoms. Lucy did get a couple giggles out of her.
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