“I’m depressed” Ben said. “I am faced with such a different life than what I had. I wish I could see out of my eye again. I easily get confused, disoriented, and tired at my physical therapy.”

When you can’t drive, can’t work, and you can’t interact with Kiara Ann and Tammy, Ben’s wife, like you used to, it can lead to such a deep sadness, strong feelings of unhappiness and despair. Looking at what you have lost is a difficult emotional, psychological, and spiritual battle. How does one turn this spiral around? One can’t simply cheer up.

I think Ben is discovering something very powerful. Recently he posted on Facebook “I'm starting to feel that God saved me for something ?”

Needless to say, so many people posted comments of encouragement and affirming Ben that God has reached into this situation and will take you and those around you to a deeper level of understanding his amazing grace, love and purpose in life.

One of the things I (Gary) am so thankful for about God’s Word, the Bible, is it real life stuff. It doesn’t leave out the difficult things. It faces them head on in the lives and stories it tells of people struggling in life and finding God in the middle of the struggle.

The Psalmist said,

“Death wrapped its ropes around me; the terrors of the grave overtook me. I saw only trouble and sorrow. Then I called on the name of the LORD: 'Please, LORD, save me!'

How kind the LORD is! How good he is! So merciful, this God of ours! The LORD protects those of childlike faith; I was facing death, and he saved me. 

Let my soul be at rest again, for the LORD has been good to me. He has saved me from death, my eyes from tears, my feet from stumbling.” Ps 116:3–8 (NLT)

God’s Word is realistic and straightforward about depression occurring even in the life of the godly, but it also makes it clear that God’s will is for “the God of hope [to] fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” Romans 15:13

So how can we help someone dealing with the signs of depression? Most people do not ‘snap out’ of depression, deep sadness, strong feelings of unhappiness and despair. The road to recovery is long, difficult, and marked by mood fluctuations which come with special intensity when there are disappointments or failures.

Listen, there is a need for venting and in some ways a release of anger, guilt or self-doubt. These repressed feelings will block all other efforts of moving out of depression. Encourage expression, accept it and work toward helping them channel this released energy into constructive directions.

·        Like the Scripture above, prayer enables one to talk honestly and fervently to God about his or her depression, and to seek His help in conquering it.

·        Give patient encouragement to your friend to talk (without trying to humor them out of it)

·        Ask interested questions such as “When do you feel the most depressed?” or “Do you spend a lot of time alone?” and “What do you usually do when you start feeling depressed?”

·        Give frequent reassurances and words of comfort.

·        Stay alert for evidence of anger, hurt, poor self-esteem, etc.

Empathize try to walk with them, but there is potential of placing unrealistic expectations to a magical cure. Beware of unhealthy dependence.

Affirm The presence of emotional support and reassurance is vital when working with people dealing with depression. Complete acceptance is one of the best ways to communicate support. When there is some movement or gains, compliments and statements of encouragement are in order.

Direct them toward positive actions

·   Avoid being alone. Force yourself to be with people. You have a choice here

·   Seek help from others. Tell someone how you’re feeling. Ask for help in combating your mood. Seek out people and situations that generate joy.

·   Sing. Music was the only cure for King Saul’s moods of depression (1 Sam. 16: 14-23). Uplifting music to manipulate your moods.

·   Praise and give thanks. Paul didn’t tell Timothy to “give thanks when you feel like it”; he said, “In everything  give thanks” (1 Thess. 5:18). Let God minister to your moods by focusing on Him.

·   Lean heavily on the power of God’s Word.  The Psalms can be very helpful.....6, 13, 18, 23, 25, 27, 31, 32, 34, 37, 38, 39, 40, 42, 43, 46, 51, 55, 57, 62, 63, 69, 71, 73, 77, 84, 86, 90, 91, 94, 95, 103, 104, 107, 110, 116, 118, 121, 123, 124, 130, 138, 139, 141, 142, 143, 146, & 147. Read them aloud.

·   Rest confidently in the presence of God’s Spirit. God’s presence is the cause for hope - and the means of deliverance.

Enlist their participation in his or her own recovery. Ways to enlist include: encouraging the person to be involved in some new activity. Help them choose things they have always wanted to do but for which he has never had time (gardening, painting, photography, aerobic sport...running, swimming, etc.).

Refer. If there is any possibility that the person represents a danger to themself, take immediate steps to obtain intervention by a professional counselor.

Other Scripture to Read: Genesis 15; 1 Kings 19; Psalm 119:25; Jonah 4; 2 Corinthians 4:1-18; Philippians 4:4-8; 1 Peter 5:7

The Serenity Prayer

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change;

courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time; Enjoying one moment at a time; Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace; Taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it; Trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His Will; That I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with Him Forever in the next. Amen. --Reinhold Niebuhr