Another year in the books...

My 17th year of teaching has come to a close. Reflecting on this year I would have to say it has been one of the strangest and hardest years yet. But ultimately, a year in which I am so grateful! 

Receiving a breast cancer diagnosis three months into school - rocked my world, turning it upside down. I had to say goodbye to my students twice for surgeries, missing so many events, and having such little energy for my own children. I pushed it when I shouldn’t have, and regretted it many times.

Then two days after my second surgery, we were in the center of a pandemic. During all of these trials, people showed up - coworkers, new friends, old friends, family members, high school friends… I have been surrounded by love and support from day one. I have found coworkers to lean on, and support through the overwhelmingly hard days. Friends reaching out and celebrating simple joys. There were days where I was squeezing in as much time as possible during remote learning to support students, that I was physically exhausted from sitting all day. Days my boys would shut my laptop and say “you are done” because the lines of my safe haven and workplace were now the same. Days when I balanced better than others work and home. Days where I took breaks and enjoyed the beauty we lived in, and days where I started in PJs and ended in PJs. I’ve learned so much: about myself as a person, a mother, a teacher...some things I liked and others I didn’t. 

I have had a husband who stepped up during my recovery and more recently during remote learning and working. He has supported me, cried with me, and loves me for me and not the alien body I am trying to adapt to. He has been patient as I mourn the loss, and supportive as I slowly accept the new normal of myself and this situation. He has cried with me as I grapple with decisions on therapy, homeopathic versus pharmaceutical options, and when I should start exercising again. He has been a rock. 

This situation is hard on everyone - yes, it’s not ideal and teaching special education remotely is not what I signed up for 17 years ago. But, my friend, Brit and I just spent three days, 15 hours, driving to see 46 students at their homes - and the joy of seeing them reminded me why I worked so hard this year. Why I spent the extra time building the relationships and connecting remotely. And also why I love where we live!

I don’t think they will remember the lessons and content they learned this trimester - but I hope they remember how they felt - and this week I hope they remember us knocking on the door of their mountain home - driving ALL over JEFFCO to find their house - and I hope they saw the smile under my mask. 

We don’t know what next year will bring, but I’m grateful to be surrounded by love at home and work - even if those lines are blurred.