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Hi Nikki Merry Christmas Zach will always live in our Heart.
DAISY <DAISYPERALTA27@AOL.COM>
NEW YORK, NY USA - Tuesday, December 3, 2013 11:06 PM CST

I was so surprised to see new guestbook entries and right at the time of year that I am so sad that I'm not sharing it with Zachary. Carrie - of course I remember you! You helped me in so many ways at the end. As his mom I hated to see him hurting and he told me that you knew how to get him comfortable. Of course he needed to hold my hand and run my fingers through his hair - but, you could get him comfortable. He told all the other nurses that they needed to learn some tips and tricks from you - because you knew how to take care of him. He even told the head nurses that - I just had to laugh. My Zachary always could tell if the person's heart was in the right place - he really liked you Carrie. So, my memories of his last moments here - I thank God that he sent you in our path to help make our Zachary comfortable. Miss you! Of course I'm glad we don't have to visit the hospital. John and I are having another baby in June - we think it's a boy :-) I'm just so thankful that Kylee, Chelsea, Emma are all healthy.
Zachary's Mom <lemannll@yahoo.com>
Pekin, il - Monday, December 20, 2010 5:40 PM CST

Hello Nicky and Family Hope all is well Zach is gone but his smile lives on forever God Bless you
Daisy Peralta <dape427@aol.com>
New York , NY USA - Tuesday, December 7, 2010 1:22 PM CST

Nikki, I don't know if you remember me, but I am a nurse in PIC and I took care of Zach a lot. I must say that he was one of my favorite patients ever! I have been thinking of him a lot lately and had to come see his gorgeous smile!! I will never forget him... he was such an amazing guy. I hope you are doing well and that you have a wonderful Christmas!!
Carrie Walles
Peoria, IL - Tuesday, December 7, 2010 10:06 AM CST

Happy Birthday Zach! Just thinking of you and your family today.
Lisa Feeney-Johann
Washington, IL - Sunday, August 1, 2010 1:44 PM CDT

its been a long time since ive signed but i wanted to say i miss you Zach soooooo much! you would of graduated a with your friends a couple weeks ago but you graduated to heaven first that is the ultimate graduation! Im just being selfish wishing i could of had just a few more memories of you here on earth.I love you so much and cant wait to see you again!
Aunt Tomi
- Monday, June 14, 2010 0:24 AM CDT

We are thinking of you and so happy to hear about the new baby on the way (or maybe already here?). We also often think of Zach and never forget him. We miss him and you too, Nikki. Love always,
Jen and Jacob
Jen Whitmer and Jacob Bollinger <kjenwhit@comcast.net>
Staunton, VA - Saturday, November 28, 2009 1:15 PM CST

Thinking of Zach today! My son, Austin, will be 17 on October 27th. Many blessings on you and your family.
Shaun Rogers <shaunr11@comcast.net>
Dunwoody, GA - Sunday, August 30, 2009 10:55 AM CDT

Oh my sweet Zach! It's been about 9 mos or better since I've signed. I didn't know we could still get on til your mom told me. Just want you to know I miss you so very much and would love to hold you and smother you with kisses. I can still feel your soft skin when I close my eyes,see your smile, and hear your laughter. It's the one thing that keeps me going. I haven't heard Big House for awhile but I still sing it to myself and think of you. (no one else would want to hear!!!!) Spike is sitting behind me while I'm on the pc, you would not believe how big he is. I'm still scared of him and leave the room if gramps gets him out. I know what your thinking that he's alot smaller than me but I just can't help it. Well Zach got to go to work so I must go. Just remember I will never ever forget you and you are always in my heart. Love you plus one forever!!!! Your favorite gramma
Gma of almost 9 <www.dlallen@hotmail.comm>
pekin, il 61554 - Wednesday, August 12, 2009 8:56 AM CDT

Hey Nikki and Family,
Since I saw you guys on Chelsea's birthday you've been on my mind even more than lately. I'm so excited that you guys are expecting again. You've already had three beautiful babies, and I'm sure this one will be a doll. I miss you guys. I can't believe it's so close to another year. I visited Zach the other day, I really miss him-and that smile.

You're always in my thoughts and prays,
Gabi Dagit
Gabi Dagit <Dramabelle92@yahoo.com>
- Wednesday, May 13, 2009 7:32 PM CDT

Happy Mother's Day Nikki
Carrie (Chassity's mom) www.caringbridge.org/va/chassity <flintcx4@yahoo.com>
The Plains, va - Sunday, May 10, 2009 10:56 AM CDT

Reading this story is touching.
Ian and Jacob
IA US - Thursday, May 7, 2009 10:09 AM CDT

Nikki Happy Birthday and Happy Easter!
Lisa Johann <ljohann04@yahoo.com>
- Sunday, April 12, 2009 9:51 PM CDT

well zach i have not signed this in a long time but
i wanted to tell you i LOVE you SOOOO much and miss you deeply words cant express it! Its almost been three years and it is so hard to believe. And congrats to the family on the baby news. I cant wait for the day when i see you again Zach! See you soon!
Tomi Horchem <zacharyfavaunt@yahoo.com>
S.Pekin, Il Usa - Friday, March 27, 2009 11:53 AM CDT

Congratulation! Nikki and John! How excited you all must be! Praying for you to have a healthy baby!
Lisa Feeney Johann <ljohann04@yahoo.com>
Washington, IL - Monday, March 23, 2009 9:31 PM CDT

Wow!!! Conggratulations! I just happened to visit your site on the right day! I am so happy for all of you!!! I will be praying for a smooth, healthy pregnancy! Love from our home to yours!
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Thursday, March 19, 2009 12:16 AM CDT

hey buddy i love ya and miss so so sooo much!!! thank you for being in my thoughts alot lately. boy it must be nice getting to enjoy that PERFECT whether. its been horrible whether here!! so send some of it our way!! XXXXOOOOXXXX
aunt mandi <justus3deakins@sbcglobal.net>
- Saturday, February 28, 2009 8:56 AM CST

boy that mess. really made me cry. its been awhile since i've done that. well marley and me!!LOL well zach jay is going to be the big 10. it just seems crazy. i had to ask your mom where did we go for your 10 birthday. i miss ya soo much buddy. justus has been crying to about you lately. were just really missing you!!! love you buddy sorry if ya are a little surprised how long its been since i typed one of these!!
aunt mandi <justus3deakins@sbcglobal.net>
- Wednesday, January 14, 2009 8:09 AM CST

Merry Christmas! I hope you guys have a great day:-)
Jenny Miller <DragonsBabe2006@yahoo.com>
Pekin, Il. U.S. - Thursday, December 25, 2008 8:48 AM CST

Hi Nikki, I just wanted to let you know I am thinking of you and always remembering Zach. We still miss him!!! I am glad you're still updating the site, and it's good to still get on here and see all the wonderful pictures of Zach. I can't believe so much time has gone by. Please give the baby a kiss for me (and a big hug for you too!).
Gen Whitmer (Jacob Bollinger's mom) <kjenwhit@comcast.net>
- Wednesday, December 17, 2008 8:12 AM CST

Have a happy & safe Thanksgiving!
Hollie LandiVittori <liamsflowerchild21@yahoo.com>
North Pekin, IL - Thursday, November 27, 2008 11:25 AM CST

Wow how time flies by. It seems like just yesterday Zach was in latchkey. I always loved his smile. I know that you say you have such a hard time with him being gone, Nikki, but I think you're doing much better than before. Your entries seem to have more hope and a zest for life in them. I want to congratulate you on your baby!!! Last time I tried to do that the entry wouldn't load. I'm sure she is just the most precious thing. Thanksgiving is almost here, so I hope you and your family have a very Happy Thanksgiving. Thoughts and Love always, Heather
Heather Schrader/Price <hthrschrdr@yahoo.com>
Pekin, Il USA - Sunday, November 9, 2008 4:54 PM CST

MISSING YOU SO MUCH!!!!GRAMPA AND I WENT WITH KYLEE,CHELSEA AND MOM AND DAD TRICK OR TREATING AROUND THE NEIGHBORHOOD. WE PASSED UP THE HOUSE WHERE THE OLD LADY FELL OUT JUST FOR YOU. OF COURSE, WE REMEMBERED LOTS OF THINGS FROM TIMES GONE BY. YOU STILL MAKE US SMILE ZACH!!!LOVE YOU PLUS ONE AND ALWAYS, YOUR FAVORITE GRAMMA
GRAMMA <dlallen@hotmail.com>
- Saturday, November 1, 2008 9:40 AM CDT

Nikki- You are an amazing mother! Praying you will be better soon. Can't imagine what you go through day after day. You are such a strong person.
Lisa Feeney-Johann <ljohann04@yahoo.com>
Washington, IL - Wednesday, October 1, 2008 10:22 PM CDT

Thinking of you Nikki (and family)!
Joy Spacht-Ruach <ejruach@sbcgloblal.net>
East Peoria, IL USA - Monday, September 29, 2008 3:00 PM CDT

Missing you little buddy. Connor is here today and he wants to tell you he really misses you. He wants you to send him a reply but I explained they don't have e-mail in heaven, but we will be able to feel a hug if we close our eyes real tight and think of you. Love you and miss you terribly. Your favorite gramma
Zach's favorite gramma <www.agrammaof7@grics.net>
- Friday, September 19, 2008 10:42 AM CDT

Hey Zachary-Dachary!! Gramma misses you and just wanted to get a big Zachary Hug. This is the only way now that I can express my love for you. Last night I had a crazy dream but you weren't in it, just your t.v. It was strange as usual. I'm not sure what makes me have such crazy dreams!! I always pray that I'll dream of you but it's been awhile that I've had a Zach dream. Hopefully one will come my way soon. Never will forget you or quit thinking about you little buddy. There is one big hole in my heart that will be there til we meet again. Love and kisses forever, Your favorite gramma
Zach's favorite gramma <ibdlallen@hotmail.com>
- Monday, September 1, 2008 9:35 AM CDT

I can just tell what a great mom you were to Zachary :-)
Jay King
- Friday, August 29, 2008 10:54 PM CDT

HAPPY 16th BIRTHDAY ZACHARY!!!!!!!!!! Miss you,love you, and long to see that sweet smile again. I'm sure the smile has not stopped since you've met Jesus. I don't think they celebrate birthdays in heaven but everyday is better than a birthday or any day of the year. Since we haven't yet experienced it, it's hard to imagine. Part of the family will be at Mom and Dad's tonight to celebrate your life. All of us miss you so very much. Not a day goes by that I don't think of you. Dad got Kylee a Hannah Montana wig and I guess she wears it alot. I haven't seen it yet but I can picture it in my head. She misses you too and reminds us not to forget you (like we would?!!!!!) Just remember I love you and will NEVER forget you. Love you plus one and more!!!!!!!!!!!
Zach's favorite gramma <www.agrammaof7@grics.net>
- Friday, August 1, 2008 8:52 AM CDT

Happy Sweet 16th Birthday Zach!!
I hope your 16th Birthday in Heaven is an AWSOME one!!Thinking of you and your family ALL the time!! MISS you buddy-
Jennifer and Brandon Horchem
- Monday, July 28, 2008 9:12 AM CDT

Nikki I too have been thinking of you and Zach. I seem to run into your family but never you. I still can't believe I haven't had a chance to see the baby. I am going to try and see you all very soon. I sure miss our moments. I loved that poem so much I turned it into a needle point for my sister and put an angel at the top that looks just like Dalton. Well hope to see you ALL very soon.
Marilyn Mowder Mommy to Our LiL Superhero Forever Aaron <stjudemomma74@comcast.net or www.caringbridge.org/il/aarondhunter>
Peoria, IL USA - Saturday, July 19, 2008 12:01 AM CDT

Nikki,
I am so happy you are updating more frequently. I understand when you don't, but it's just nice click on the site & read a new post :]

I hope everyday brings you new surprises with Chelsea Adele! I'm sure she keeps you busy :)

Love,
Hollie <amydav86@comcast.net>
North Pekin, IL - Friday, July 18, 2008 2:44 PM CDT

i like the entry nikki. i always do but this one was nice to read!! well zach i havent a zach moment for a while. yesterday i was down stairs cleaning and i came across those egga out iof the gumball machine. and inside it were the poker chips we got at i think itwas called carlos o'kellys and you were coning jay into trading the better ones for your crappy ones and you knew he didnt know better!!LOL it just made me chukle somethuing i needed for awhile. so you better be working on giving me some more!! i love ya buddy and miss ya bunches!!
aunt mandi <justus3deakins@sbcglobal.net>
- Tuesday, July 15, 2008 8:18 AM CDT

happy 4th of july zach and the same to his family!!
Jennifer and Brandon Horchem <riverfanxs496@yahoo.com>
- Friday, July 4, 2008 0:02 AM CDT

My precious Zach, How I miss you. Yesterday Tanner and Connor spent the day with me and we talked about how you liked to play goofy golf. On Fathers Day "all of us" went to Putt Putt and Grandma was the top player!!!! I even beat Uncle Tim. I think you had something to do with that. I remember all the times we went golfing but if I remember right you ususally won. I believe you were 4 yrs old the first time grandpa and I took you to Peoria to goofy golf. You were hooked. The black light version in Memphis that you liked was the only one I wasn't too fond of. I kept tripping over everything but it got you to laugh. You are always close to my heart and don't ever think otherwise. Love you plus one and forever!!!!!!!!grandma
Zach's favorite grandma <www.agrammaof7@grics.org>
- Saturday, June 21, 2008 9:19 AM CDT

I almost cried when I read that Zach was worried about people forgetting about him...he will live on in MANY hearts FOREVER!!! Just this weekend while we were at the Turkey Festival, I had a happy memory of seeing Zach there a few years back, it made me smile! He would ALWAYS make sure to say HI to us anytime he would see us out~ WHAT A POLITE young man!!! Kayla is getting ready to do the run for YOU again, Zach!! It means SO much to her to do that in your memory! The kids are also doing a youth lap for the Relay for Life in a couple weeks. Not to worry, ZACHARY MONTELL ALLEN, you shall NEVER be forgotten!!! We love ALL of you!!! Kim, Kayla, Nick & Mason
kim meints
pekin, il usa - Wednesday, June 11, 2008 10:51 PM CDT

ZACHARY How I miss you little buddy. Not a day, moment, or second goes by that I don't think of you. Monday we planted some flowers for you and all the kids cleaned off your stone. It's at moments like these that it truly hits me and it seems unbareable, then I realize that you're healed and whole walking the streets of gold or should I say running,laughing, and having a grand time with Jesus. There's so many times I want to call you to tell you something funny or such. Tanner and I were singing "BIG HOUSE" in your honor. Just to know that you can play football and enjoy eternal life is wonderful. But I still miss you terribly. Love you plus one and more!!!!!!!!Your favorite gramma
gramma of 8 <www.grammaof7@net.org>
- Saturday, May 31, 2008 10:52 AM CDT

John, Nikki, Kylee and baby Chelsea- Thinking about you and your family today! Zach is looking down with a ray of sunshine. I can't believe it has been two yrs already.
God Bless

Lisa Feeney-Johann <LJOHANN04@YAHOO.COM>
Washington, IL - Monday, May 26, 2008 10:21 PM CDT

Hello John, Nikki, Kylee & baby Chelsea!! I wanted you to know we are thinking of ALL of you today. I took Kayla to the cemetary & she left a couple things for Zach. She cried & cried...it still seems so recent that he was here sharing that BIG smile with everyone he loved!! He'll ALWAYS be with each of us in our hearts!! Love you guys!!! Kim, Kayla, Nick & Mason
kim meints
pekin, il usa - Monday, May 26, 2008 8:40 PM CDT

To the Allen family - remembering you today on this difficult but joyous day - the day Zach was forever healed but also gone from this earth. I am praying for you on this difficult day and always. I can't wait to see new pictures of the baby!
Christine
- Monday, May 26, 2008 10:17 AM CDT

Congratulations! Looking forward to seeing pictures of your new baby!
Jay King
- Tuesday, May 6, 2008 5:41 PM CDT

ohh zach chelsea is sooooo adorable!!! we really need her in our family ! you couldnt have picked a better time!! she is such a true blessing to the whole family!! well i wore ur shirt the day mom was suppost to deliver but of course it didnt happen till 3:30a.m. her take home outfit was soo adorable. mommy and daddy did a great job. i dont know how ya feel that dad bought her several card. outfits. shell look adorable in it anyways!!hahahaha thats funny about the lizard!! i can just see grandma now!! LOL well i miss u buddy soooo much!!
aunt mandi <justus3deakins@sbcglobal.net>
- Tuesday, May 6, 2008 12:18 AM CDT

HEY ZACH! ITS GRAMMA SENDING YOU A LOT OF LOVE AND EVEN MORE KISSES!!!!!!! GRAMPA AND I MISS YOU SO VERY MUCH AND LONG TO HOLD YOU AND SEE THAT SWEET SMILE. GRAMPA ASKED MOM LAST NIGHT IF HE COULD PLANT SOMETHING, MAYBE A SUNFLOWER OUT AT THE CEMETERY. I'LL NEVER FORGET HOW EXCITED YOU WERE WHEN YOU PLANTED YOUR VERY OWN SUNFLOWER AT OUR HOUSE. YOUR NEW BABY SISTER ARRIVED MAY 2ND AND I HAVE A FEELING SHE IS GOING TO BE JUST AS LOVABLE AS YOU AND KYLEE. SHE'S A BEAUTIFUL BABY AND OH SO PRECIOUS. JUST REMEMBER WE WILL NEVER FORGET YOU AND WILL MAKE SURE CHELSEA WILL KNOW ALL ABOUT YOU. I KNOW MOM AND DAD WILL DO THE SAME. MOM IS LETTING GRAMPA HAVE SPIKE AND HE IS THRILLED, BUT YOU KNOW HOW I FEEL ABOUT LIZARDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!I'M NOT QUITE AS ANXIOUS AS HE IS. I LOVE YOU, MISS YOU, AND THINK OF YOU EVERY MOMENT. GRAMMA IS SENDING YOU LOTS OF HUGS AND KISSES. LOVE YOU PLUS ONE!!!!!!! YOUR FAVORITE GRAMMA IN THE WHOLE WORLD!!!!!!!
GRAMMA OF ZACH AND 7 MORE BLESSINGS <www.agrammaof7@net.org>
- Tuesday, May 6, 2008 10:36 AM CDT

Nikki,John and Kylee Congrats on your new little bundle of joy. I am so excited for you all. Best wishes
Lisa
Lisa Feeney-Johann <ljohann04@yahoo.com>
Washington, IL - Sunday, May 4, 2008 9:22 AM CDT

BEST of WISHES to the whole family on the new arrvial Thursday. Zach will be with you all during this time. And just think how happy he is going to be-to be another big brother. Just wanted to wish you all the best and say once again CONGRATS to ALL. Keeping you all in our thoughts and prayers...
Jennifer and Brandon Horchem <riverfanxs496@yahoo.com>
- Wednesday, April 30, 2008 6:33 PM CDT

Oh, I know how much you miss your Zachary. He will be watching over you when you give birth to Chelsea. Best wishes!
Jay King
- Friday, April 25, 2008 3:18 PM CDT

hey sis how are ya? i seen the same bib and got a little choked up also. its going to be a hard thing to deal with your feelings when it comes to that(zach) were all here for ya though. you have a family that loves you dearly!! it doesnt seem that long does it. i miss him soo much there aint an even an hour that goes by that i dont think of him. i just have to remind myself hes in a better place, and doing what god has in plan for him. someday nik someday!! it will be totally awsome. god works in miraculous ways!! i know i speeled that wrong,but hey its me!! love ya!! miss ya buddy!!
aunt mandi <justus3deakins@sbcglobal.net>
- Sunday, April 13, 2008 10:24 PM CDT

Nikki,
It has been so very long since I have been on this site; too long really. I want to cogratulate you on your new bundle of joy that is soon to arrive. B.J. and I just had our first on Nov. 28,2007. I still think of you guys and pray for your well being often. Good luck with all and God bless.
Heather Price <hthrschrdr@yahoo.com>
pekin, il usa - Wednesday, April 9, 2008 6:23 PM CDT

You are in our thoughts and prayers.

caringbridge.org/visit/quiltsofhope
Jaime <aquiltofhope@aol.com>
- Thursday, April 3, 2008 9:29 AM CDT

Hi Nikki,

I have a friend who recently lost her child to NB and it was only since her diagnosis that I was familiar with caringbridge and the children fighting this horrible disease. I discovered Zachary's site after May 26,2006.

I wish I would have 'met' Zach sooner. It would have been a priveledge to pray for him. I will pray for you and your family, though.

I have read the entries, viewed the photos and cried for 3 days. Tears for so much suffering. I especially cried at the photos of him curled up on the bed with the little tube connected to his body and the photo of him wearing the oxygen mask with the little graduation cap on. My mother's heart was broken looking at that sweet little boy. Such poignant pictures.

I have a 12 year old son and I can relate to the basketball and go-carts. I wondered last night if Jesus has go-cart races with the young boys or if they play basketball in heaven :) I suppose so, knowing that Jesus was a little boy once, too.

I was so happy to read about Zach's love for Jesus and I look forward to meeting him in heaven.

I was very touched by his story...his stubborn fight, his desire to make people around him happy, his mission for God, his pure devotion to you and so much more.

I also was touched by your sweet love, hope and care of your son. A mother's love is a beautiful thing.

I look forward to reading more updates with the new baby coming. It sounds like you have a wonderful family!

Much love, Jean
Jean <pbi@digisys.net>
- Monday, March 17, 2008 2:45 PM CDT

MY ZACHARY! HOW I MISS YOU!!!!!!!!!Not a day goes by little buddy that I don't picture your smiles and feel your hugs. I could really use another "dream" like I had a few months ago. Connor is so much like you in so many ways. You would be so proud of him. He misses you too along with everyone else. I'm having a quilt made with some of your special t-shirts for mom. When I took them to the lady in charge I had to tell her all about you and show her your scrapebook. I'm sure all the ladies in the quilt club are getting a few laughs with some of those shirts!!!!!!!Grampa and I talk about you and how brave and strong you were. You set a very high standard for us. I just hope we made you glad to be our grandson. See ya on the flip side!!!!! Love you plus one!!!!!!!!!!!Your favorite grandma
diane <www.agrammaof7@net.com>
- Friday, March 7, 2008 1:33 PM CST

Thinking of you and your precious growing family.
Joy Spacht-Ruach and family <ejruach@sbcglobal.net>
East Peoria, IL USA - Tuesday, February 26, 2008 8:09 PM CST

Just checking in on you and thinking of Zach today. He impacted so many lives and I can't thank you enough for sharing his journey with us. Praying for you and waiting for the anouncement of the baby girl. Believing.
Kori <kirb77_95@yahoo.com>
West Monroe, La - Thursday, February 21, 2008 3:41 PM CST

I'm thinking of you and so very happy for you with the new baby on the way! Chelsea is a pretty name! We miss Zach a lot. Sometimes just seeing his pictures on the site makes me cry because I remember how wonderful his smile is. How you must miss him!

I am looking forward to hearing about that beautiful baby girl when she is born!
Jen and Jacob www.caringbridge.org/va/jacob_bollinger <kjenwhit@comcast.net>
- Wednesday, February 20, 2008 6:22 AM CST

Congratulation on your Baby Girl May she be very bless I always have you and your Family in my thoughts
Daisy Peralta <daisyperalta27@aol.com>
New York , NY USA - Friday, February 15, 2008 11:25 PM CST

Good luck tomorrow Nikki! I know you'll do great!
My thoughts and prayers are with you :]

Hollie <liamsflowerchild21@yahoo.com>
North Pekin, IL - Thursday, February 7, 2008 3:44 PM CST

Hi Nic, wanted to let you know I still check Zach's site. I think of him often. I hope you're feeling better, and I hope your house is getting back in order. When are you coming over to see us? Tell John the super bowl is coming and he could make us those yummy treats he made last year!! : )
Gina
Groveland, IL - Tuesday, January 29, 2008 7:50 AM CST

Congrats Nikki on having a girl. I am so excited for you all. I think about you so often. Praying things go very well for you and your family. Zach is looking down from heaven.
Lisa Feeney-Johann
Washington, Il - Monday, January 28, 2008 8:02 PM CST

Nikki~ Thanks for the update..I still check in on you guys regularly and it is always nice to hear from you! I am so happy for all of you that you're having a girl!!! What fun!!! I'm sure Kylee will be a terrific big sister too! I was 11 when my parents had my first younger sister and it was alot of fun! Well~ Hang in there and know that I am still praying for all of you as you miss your sweet Zachary! Have a nice weekend~ Kate
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Friday, January 25, 2008 7:43 PM CST

Hi Nikki,

This is my first time signing the guestbook. I have followed Zach's story for the past few years. I was a single parent for many many years and am extremely close to my son, and I can not imagine the pain you are feeling missing Zach. I am so glad to hear about the new baby. What a blessing! We are anxiously waiting on an update---- boy or girl? Or are you keeping us all in suspense?

Good luck and God bless.
Mary <marybgood@comcast.net>
- Wednesday, January 16, 2008 12:33 AM CST

Zach, Gramma misses you very much but I also know you are much better off with Jesus. Sometimes I close my eyes and pretend you are still here. I hear your giggles, see your big smile, and feel your love. Thank you for being so strong, determined, and so very loveable all the time no matter what you had to go through. Love you and miss you so very much, Your favorite gramma
diane <www.agrammaof7@grics.net>
- Monday, January 14, 2008 2:31 PM CST

Thinking of your family during the holiday season.
Kellie <kelliekea@hotmail.com>
Tyler , Tx USA - Thursday, January 3, 2008 10:27 AM CST

Keeping you in my Thoughts and prayers I know how hard it must be we are missing our Angel too. Congratulation on the Baby that really lit up my heart May God Bless the baby right inside of you and may God bless you and your family.
Daisy Peralta <daisyperalta27@aol.com>
New York , NY USA - Saturday, December 29, 2007 9:24 AM CST

so buddy how was ur celebration?? im sure AWSOME!!!i luv u and miss u soooo much. ur mom did ok yesturday. kylee got a wii. that was fun!! we had a bowling tournament with the whole family. FUNNY!! well u take care zach i love you and cant wait to see ya!!
aunt mandi <justus3deakins@sbcglobal.net>
- Wednesday, December 26, 2007 10:43 AM CST

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. We know how hard Christmas is with out Zach. We feel the same way with out Anthony. We love you!
Robin Ford
Mankato, mn - Monday, December 24, 2007 1:07 PM CST

Thinking of you and wish you all a Merry Christmas and a happy New Year.
Carrie <flintcx4@yahoo.com>
The Plains, Va - Monday, December 24, 2007 10:52 AM CST

well for some reason im having or least it feels like it a harder time with zach not being here! i can not onlt imagine whats it lke for you sis. if ya need me call me im here for ya!! we need to do a special thing every year this time exspecially. the way i like to think of it that christmas is celebration of jesus birth. i believe when you are chosen to leave earth to go to heaven then christmas is there celebration too. soo i dont know if that will help soothe the heart some but i thought i just sare my feeling on what i do for it. luv ya sooo much zachie!! i miss you!!
aunt mandi <justus3deakins@sbcglobal.net>
- Sunday, December 16, 2007 2:56 AM CST

I just wanted you to know we think of you often and check in. I don't always post a note, but I wanted to say congratulations on the new little sweet pea on the way. :) I'm thrilled for you! We also think of Zach often. I'm glad you still post and still keep sharing his stories. I also hope you all had a wonderful time in Disney.

Much love,
Jen and Jacob
www.caringbridge.com/va/jacob_bollinger <kjenwhit@comcast.net>
- Saturday, December 8, 2007 11:34 AM CST

zac i hope you are having so mUch fun
ashley <nanna1@grics.net>
pekin, ill usa - Thursday, December 6, 2007 10:46 AM CST

I pray that you all are having an amazing time in Disney!
I know Zach is with everyone.
Hollie <liamsflowerchild21@yahoo.com>
North Pekin, IL - Saturday, December 1, 2007 1:20 PM CST

i hope you all enjoy your magical gathering at disney... zach honey i hope you know how special this trip is to all the kids!! they are SOOO looking forward to this trip... that's all chase has talked about for sometime. i want to say thank you for making this dream come true from him and all the others.... hope you all have a safe trip and enjoy every mintue of it cuz you'll all have so much fun and then before you know it-- it will be time to come home. ENJOY AND ENJOY THE FAMILY TIMES!! nikki i hope you will be able to enjoy this trip and zach will be w/ you in spirits- take care and enjoy.
jennifer and brandon <riverfanxs496@yahoo.com>
- Tuesday, November 20, 2007 8:23 PM CST

Hi,
Your family is in our thoughts and prayers. Hope you have a wonderful trip.

caringbridge.org/visit/quiltsofhope
Jaime <aquiltofhope@aol.com>
- Sunday, November 18, 2007 9:25 PM CST

Hi,
Your family is in our thoughts and prayers. Hope you have a wonderful trip.

caringbridge.org/visit/quiltsofhope
Jaime <aquiltofhope@aol.com>
- Sunday, November 18, 2007 9:24 PM CST

Hi Nikki~ I still check in regularly and say a prayer for you when I do! I pray for a healthy baby and that your heart doesn't hurt too much when remembering Zach but rejoices in his home in Heaven! He is so special and you are so blessed that he called YOU Mom! I hope you all have a terrific time In Florida! Take care!~ Kate
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Saturday, November 10, 2007 5:43 AM CST

ZACH Hi sweetie! It's now November and a very chilly day today. Tonight is Connor's bday party so we'll all be together. I know you will be too. The love that we all have for you just keeps growing and we always talk about you. Disney is coming up really soon and it will be awesome but I know each of us wishes you were here to go to. There will definitely be a big hole but we all will have you with us in our hearts. Oh how Connor is waiting to see you at Disney. Maybe he will-who knows. I know I see you in my dreams and Ali "seen" you at high school. Anything is possible. Just wanted to let you know I miss you, love you, and hold you close to my heart always. Love you plus one, Your favorite gramma
gramma with a broken heart <www.agrammaof7@grics.net>
- Friday, November 2, 2007 2:15 PM CDT

Please know that you and your entire family continue to be in my thoughts and prayers. And even though I did not know Zach (or even you) personally, I think of him all of the time too. I lost my dad in August 2006 to lung cancer. He was only 59 and never smoked a day in his life. I know how much I miss him and cannot even imagine the loss of a child. FYI -- I am a friend of Mary Ann Arnold and my oldest son, Tyler, is good friends with Jared Oltman.

P.S. Congratulations on your pregnancy. I hope you start feeling better very soon. Should you need surgery, I hope that everything goes well. Have a wonderful time at Disney.
Michelle Brown and family <brown_Michelle_L@cat.com>
Manito, IL 61546 - Tuesday, October 16, 2007 9:02 AM CDT

Congratulations Nikki and John and Kylee! We think of you often.
Joy Spacht-Ruach <ejruach@sbcglobal.net>
East Peoria, IL USA - Monday, October 15, 2007 4:25 PM CDT

Zachary, It's your favorite grandma in the whole world. You will never cease to amaze me. Like mom, things come back to me that you said or done and it's breath-taking. We all miss you so much it's hard to even put into words. I haven't seen your buddy Chris lately, so I've been thinking of him too. He could always make you smile. I've been hoping to "spend some time with you in a dream" but I guess the time hasn't been right. I daydream about you alllllll the time though. Grandpa is really hurting inside and missing you too. You will always be on the top of our thoughts till we meet you in heaven. Ya know, grandpa and I both are over the hill mark, so it might not be as long as we think. Thanks Zach for your love. You taught me determination, never to give up, and to love. What a lot for such a young boy. Love you plus one forever, grandma
Zach's favorite grandma <www.agrammaof7@grics.net>
- Sunday, October 14, 2007 10:58 AM CDT

nikki im really needing a good zach story!! im missing him extra bad lately. hes been heavy on my heart lately. its just been soo long since i seen him touched him and smelledhim and hear his voice. im really wanting and needing a awsome zach dream. come on buddy aunt mandi is missing ya!!
aunt mandi <justus3deakins@sbcglobal.net>
- Thursday, October 4, 2007 0:12 AM CDT

I WROTE YOUR NAME IN THE SAND,BUT THE WAVES WASHED IT AWAY. I WROTE YOUR NAME IN THE SKY BUT THE WIND BLEW IT AWAY.I WROTE YOUR NAME IN MY HEART,AND THAT'S WHERE IT WILL STAY.I LOVE YOU ZACH AND THINK ABOUT YOU EVERY DAY. YOUR SIS/ MARISSA
MARISSA TODD <juicyfruit081006@yahoo.com>
PEORIA, IL US - Sunday, September 23, 2007 3:59 PM CDT

Congratulation Nikki, John and Kylee
I am so excited for you all. This is a gift from heaven.

Lisa Feeney-Johann
Washington, IL - Thursday, September 13, 2007 1:34 PM CDT

Congrats Nikki!!!! It is really funny how Kylee told. I am sure you all are very happy. You will have fun shopping for baby clothes. Take care of yourself.
Janet
Pekin , IL USA - Wednesday, September 12, 2007 3:47 PM CDT

oh! so nice of Kylee to post that on the Internet for you....LOL. I'm glad you called me!!! She's excited, I can tell...keep us updated. I can't believe you're all flying! WOW You'll have to tell me about your family's response when you told them that...LOL.

and congratulations to you too JOHN!!!!!
Gina <gbooth@insightbb.com>
- Wednesday, September 12, 2007 11:35 AM CDT

1st CONGRATS!!! I bet John so excited-- Sounds like Kylee sure is too. What GREAT news for your family!!
Sure glad to hear Kylee is doing well in school. New friends and getting to see her old ones too. My how she has grown....
Sounds like the whole family can't wait to get on that plane and get started on having that family trip!! Enjoy every minute of it... Sometimes you wish you could freeze time so it would never end--sounds like this trip will be a BLAST--
Well I hope you all enjoy your trip and the next time I check in on your pg. maybe there will be more news or stories. I like to "hear" Zach stories. I miss him too. Again CONGRATS to all and may God Bless you during and after your baby days. Your always in our thoughts and prayers...
Jennifer and Brandon <riverfanxs496@yahoo.com>
- Tuesday, September 11, 2007 8:22 PM CDT

Nikki~ WOW!!! Congratulations! How exciting- I know you probably didn't want anyone to know about the pregnancy but just think- now we can pray for a perfectly healthy happy pregnancy and little baby!!! So many prayers- what more could you want- right? Well- I am so happy for you, John and Kylee and your little angel!!! And the trip to Disney sounds INCREDIBLE!!! Enjoy! Well- thanks for the update and again- congratulations and God Bless~ kate
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Saturday, September 8, 2007 7:58 PM CDT

what?? did I read Kylee's message correctly...you are expecting???? congratulations!!!! to all of you, that's wonderful! Zach would be so thrilled, it's like a gift from him!!!!!! take extra good care of yourself!!! kayla gets her permit tomorrow....can you believe that??! love you guys!!!
kim meints
pekin, il usa - Thursday, September 6, 2007 9:29 PM CDT

hi brother how are you doing i just wanted to say i love you oh yah and that moms pregnet... and that i mad new friends and so should you so how are doinin up in heaven hope your doinin graet at lest your not sick where your at right now... schools going graet my techers are nice oh how i wish i were with my old best friends i saw sieara and micaylan the other day me in my freinds play four square like i did with my old frends hopefully mom has a girl so i could play with somebody i hope i could get a shining stars like you now they came out with webkins adn millsberry also neopets i just wanted to let you now i love ya well i g2g, seincearly your sis kylee
your sister Kylee <kla@yahoo.com>
pekin, llionis - Thursday, September 6, 2007 5:48 PM CDT

zach man oh man how i miss u sooo!!!! and going sooo long without a dream of u in it gets me frustrated!! exspecially after seeing grandmas been having quite a few!! i know ur waiting for the right time. mine will just be extra special hu??!!LOL ur mom is keeping her self busy. she does so much. when i was younger and after she had u is when i really started to look up to her. shes done everything on her own for a long time until john came along but what is it like at least 11 years she did it all. and she couldnt have done it any better. and i just wish she didnt have to go threw what she does. but god has his plans i know that, but u know what i mean!! i miss u buddy soo much. i luv u too nikki!! ur an amazing sister, mom, and wife!! just hanf in there the time will come and it will be amazing trully amazing!!!
aunt mandi <justus3deakins@sbcglobal.net>
- Wednesday, August 29, 2007 0:46 AM CDT

May I ask what a chemo angel is?

Zach is always in my thoughts as well as you guys.
I miss all of you!

Hollie <liamsflowerchild21@yahoo.com>
North Pekin, IL - Tuesday, August 28, 2007 7:35 PM CDT

ZACHARY,It's gramma, your favorite gramma in the whole world. grampa and I have been having an extra hard time lately.We miss you soooooooo much it hurts. Our song "Big House" still plays on WCIC and I always picture you. It makes me smile and realize all the fun youre having. Even though I know you're in a better place, I still long for your giggle, smile, and loving ways. Right now everytime I dream about you helps me get through another day. I just wish I could dream every night!!!!!!! I have to go to work but I'll be thinking of you always. Love you plus one!!!!!!!!!
gramma <www.agrammaof7@grics.net>
- Monday, August 27, 2007 7:55 AM CDT

Hi Nikki, Just wanted you to know that I still check Zach's page everyday for updates. It's just hard to sign most of the time. But Chass and Zach and Anthony too are all together now. I think of you all the time and wonder how your doing. There's only so much that we can really say on these web pages. I hope all is well and your finding peace.
Carrie (Chassity's mom) www.caringbridge.org/va/chassity <flintcx4@yahoo.com>
The Plains, va - Saturday, August 25, 2007 6:53 PM CDT

This is probably really strange, I don't know you and I don't know your family. How i came onto your page, my boyfriend [zach] and I [kylee] typed in our names together messing around to see what would come up on yahoo. This took me to your site that I also exed out of, but instead I decided to read. Your story is so amazing. Zach sounds like such an awesome kid. but more importantly, I can tell you I KNOW he is in a good place, which you seem to know too. You are so strong and any kid would be SOOOO lucky to have you for a mom. I'm just a kid myself too, and how zach fought through all that .. is just unreal to me. Your story has touched me, and you'll be in my prayers. You seem to have a wonder teen .. but you also seem like quite the wonder mom.
Kylee <kprice1709@yahoo.com>
Cincinnati, OH USA - Sunday, August 12, 2007 7:19 PM CDT

This is probably really strange, I don't know you and I don't know your family. How i came onto your page, my boyfriend [zach] and I [kylee] typed in our names together messing around to see what would come up on yahoo. This took me to your site that I also exed out of, but instead I decided to read. Your story is so amazing. Zach sounds like such an awesome kid. but more importantly, I can tell you I KNOW he is in a good place, which you seem to know too. You are so strong and any kid would be SOOOO lucky to have you for a mom. I'm just a kid myself too, and how zach fought through all that .. is just unreal to me. Your story has touched me, and you'll be in my prayers. You seem to have a wonder teen .. but you also seem like quite the wonder mom.
Kylee
Cincinnati, OH USA - Sunday, August 12, 2007 7:16 PM CDT

Happy Belated Birthday Zach. Hope you are having a great party in Heaven! Make sure you keep Anthony in line.

Nikki,
I know how hard this is. Zach is with you everyday and he is always checking in to make sure you are doing okay. Believe in all the things that you see and hear. It really is Zach letting you know that he is with you and that he loves you very much!!
Love you and sending you lots of hugs.
Robin Ford
Mankato, MN - Saturday, August 4, 2007 7:07 PM CDT

I know today is a hard day for you. I want you to know I'm thinking of you. I know you're struggling. Try to do something fun? Tim is excited about the run this weekend. I think he raised close to $900.00. I'll be at the civic center at some point to support the runners. Call me on my cell if you decide to go....I understand though if you aren't able to.
Gina <gbooth@insightbb.com>
Groveland, - Wednesday, August 1, 2007 8:13 AM CDT

Connor woke up this morning and said "I had a good dream lastnight, I dreamed about Aunt Nikki" he goes "I love her" with this big ole smile on his face. He is so stinkin cute and I think he reminds everyone of Zach.
Amber <tatcallen@ntslink.net>
- Monday, July 23, 2007 11:39 AM CDT

Ok Zach I'm gonna try this again. I tried yesterday but after I typed in everything I mistakenly hit clear. I almost could hear you laughing!!!!!!!As always I miss you and long for your touch, your hugs, your giggles, your sweet smile. Everyday I have to pass by two huge gardens of sunflowers. It always brings on the tears. I can remember how proud you were with that sunflower at our house. You were quite the gardener. I'm going to moms tonight. She's having a get together card making party. I feel you everytime I step inside the house. Thanks for the memories,Zach, I will cherish them til we meet again. Your favorite gramma, Love you plus one!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
gramma <www.agrammaof7@.net.com>
- Tuesday, July 17, 2007 9:18 AM CDT

ur update made me cry.. it was sooo touching. its wierd in a way that when im with u u dont express these feelings. i have to read them on here. u can call me ANYTIME sis!! aug. first is a hard time for me. its hard b/c sydnee and robbies and i think jacobs b-day is all on that day too. so just think of zach the whole time. i miss him so. and its soo true zachs life for me feels like its froze still here on earth. i guess thats how its suppost to feel till we meet in heaven and start were we left off only perfect in all ways!! i love u sissy and ill keep u in my prayers that u will have an awsome zach experience. wich by the way have u had one lately??!! its been quite a while for me. i cant wait till i do!!! ive been needing one lately. well take care sis!!
aunt mandi <justus3deakins@sbcglobal.net>
- Monday, July 16, 2007 11:53 PM CDT

Hi Nikki,
The stone is beautiful. It shares so much about Zach in such a wonderful way that just jumps out at me from the screen. I love the image of him with Jesus, dancing.

I really miss Zach. I hope that you are taking care of yourself as much as you can and being gentle with yourself. You're a wonderful, loving mom and a beautiful person.

I miss you!
Love,
Jen
Jen (Jacob's mom) <kjenwhit@comcast.net>
- Tuesday, July 10, 2007 5:52 PM CDT

I wanted to let you know that Tim & I went to see Zach's stone tonight. It is really georgeous. They did an excellent job. It really represents him.

Tim mailed out his letters today for the run. He's been getting in shape! I can't run to the end of my street so that is why I wont be doing that...LOL.
Gina
Groveland, IL - Saturday, July 7, 2007 10:19 PM CDT

HAPPY 4th to you guys..it just so happens to be my FAVORITE holiday also!!! hope you all are doing well & spending lots of precious family time together!! Kayla's been gettin' in shape for the Run, she's very excited to be doing this for Zach & all the kids!!! love you guys!! kim & the kids
kim meints
pekin, il usa - Monday, July 2, 2007 6:45 PM CDT

nikki its wierd in a way because 4th of july i celebrate and look at it in a whole different way now. i think of zach the whole time and memories and knowing this is a holiday he loved. i dont know what it is with men and lighting those thing with fire and watching them explode. i just see money burning up!! but know its soo different. i want to just go all out and make a big display for zach!! i miss him soo much too nikki. i bet his view is so much better! and his smile ohh how i wish i could see it in person.
aunt mandi <justus3deakins@sbcglobal.net>
- Monday, July 2, 2007 2:59 PM CDT

Happy Father's Day John!!

Hollie <liamsflowerchild21@yahoo.com>
North Pekin, IL - Sunday, June 17, 2007 10:37 AM CDT

Nikki~ Thanks so much for your story! I love reading them- it gives more and more of a feeling of "knowing" Zach!!!! What a sweet kid!!! And such a wonderful MOM!!! You really are special! I want to make sure you know that I pray for you every day... Please tell us more stories... they really brighten my day! Take care~ Kate
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Monday, June 11, 2007 5:49 PM CDT

Nikki-

It was such a surprise to see my name on here. Thanks for thinking of Hollie and I. It's understandable that you couldn't come. I had a nice time at the walk today.

Thanks
Gabi Dagit <Dramabelle92@yahoo.com>
- Saturday, June 9, 2007 6:00 PM CDT

Oh by the way, Zach, this is Turkey Festival weekend. I'll be thinking of you as I eat strawberry shortcake. Only if you could enjoy it with us!!!!!!
Gramma <www.agrammaof7@net.org>
- Thursday, June 7, 2007 1:02 PM CDT

Zachary, It's gramma again. So sorry I haven't kept up on your web site. It's been almost 3 months since I've "sent" you a note. I love you and miss you more than you'll ever know or maybe you do know now. I'm not sure how "that" works til we meet again. Gramma had an awesome dream last week of you. It really helped me. I actually touched your hair and smelled it. It truly was you. Your giggle and funny faces will help me get by. Oh how I miss you sweet one. Hope to meet you in my dreams again real soon!!!!!!!!!Love you plus one, your favorite gramma
Zach's favorite gramma <www.agrammaof7@net.org>
- Thursday, June 7, 2007 1:00 PM CDT

Thinking of your sweet guy today. I only know him through your words on this website. My prayers go out to you and the families of these sick children I read about.
Kellie <kelliekea@hotmail.com>
Tyler , Tx USA - Wednesday, June 6, 2007 11:27 PM CDT

Nikki---thank you so much for the congrats!! It meant a lot!

You & your family are always in my prayers. I think about Zach daily (mainly when I go shoe shopping...:]) and I can't wait for the walk this Saturday!!

Love always,
Hollie <liamsflowerchild21@yahoo.com>
North Pekin, IL - Monday, June 4, 2007 9:07 PM CDT

Hi Nikki - I'm so sorry you're having such a hard time. Maybe its time to think about some councelling - what do you think? Zach surely wouldn't want you in tears. Love and prayrs.
Lisa
- Monday, June 4, 2007 5:15 PM CDT

Hello Nikki Please know that I have been thinking about you and your family I know God is right next to you holding your hands Zachary will never be forgotten. And now Zachary is with Jesus with no more Cancer and no more pains.
Daisy Peralta <daisyperalta27@aol.com>
New York , NY USA - Saturday, June 2, 2007 6:08 AM CDT

Nikki~I haven't written in a LONG time- but I've really been thinking of you alot this week and I just wanted you to know. What a precious boy! I keep going back to when he told you that he had just one more person that he needed to talk to before he went to Heaven! What a heart that was so sensitive to God's voice- we should all strive to be more like Zachary! You did a terrific job raising such a young man with a sincere heart for God! What a blessing! You take care and know that I love you from Coatesville, Pa!!! ~ Kate and family
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Friday, June 1, 2007 8:37 PM CDT

I know I don't know Zach, but a friend sent me a link to this page. His story is amazing and inspiring, and I'm very glad that I happened upon it today.

God Bless and Keep You
Lauren
Knoxville, TN USA - Wednesday, May 30, 2007 7:10 AM CDT

Nikki,
Thinking of you and Zach today.
Love,
Jennifer Click and Carolyn & Evan Coveney <jsclick@gmail.com>
Springfield, VA - Saturday, May 26, 2007 11:03 PM CDT

I had an amazing time today. I love watching Zach videos. They always make me smile and laugh. It really meant a lot that Zach said my name in the one video...I had never seen that one before, but it made me feel so special. I also loved what he said about Kris afterwards...that was sweet & could only be said with love in the heart. He was an amazing guy and will always be missed.
The food was also amazing!! Thank you!
Hollie <liamsflowerchild21@yahoo.com>
North Pekin, IL - Saturday, May 26, 2007 9:39 PM CDT

What a wonderful way to honor Zachary. May your memories be sweet and bring comfort your way.
Hugs to you and your family,
jennifer
Toronto, Ontario Canada - Saturday, May 26, 2007 6:54 PM CDT

Sending you prayers today - I'm sure it will be a very tough one for you. love and hugs, your boy must be so, so proud of you. Live strong for Zach.
Lisa
- Saturday, May 26, 2007 2:16 PM CDT

Nikki and family- Just wanted to let you know that I am thinking about you today! Your family is in my thoughts and prayers.
Lisa Johann
East Peoria, IL 61611 - Saturday, May 26, 2007 9:43 AM CDT

Dearest Nikki and Family, I'm sure that it's still so hard to get up everyday and live life espically now w/ the yr coming very soon... Try to keep your faith up. I'm sure you have MANY thoughts and prayers coming your way everyday. I wish I could say more words to help you but I have never been in your shoes. I'm sure the words from other parents that know what it's like help on these rough days. But remember that Kylee and John and all your family understand how you could feel. My thoughs go to you and ALL your family. Kylee is so sweet... Both of your kids are just awsome and a pleasure to know and love. I hope there are days you find peace but what you are doing(scrapping and helping the other kids that are in Zach's shoes really appeceate what you are doing ^ing $ for them that takes someone strong).Remember that your loved and we'll see Zach again someday. Hopefully Brandon and I can make it out there to remember Zach on Sat. Until next time...Love Jennifer
Jennifer Horchem <riverfanxs496@yahoo.com>
- Monday, May 21, 2007 6:49 PM CDT

Happy Mother's Day Nikki! You are a great mom! Zack is smiling down on you today! I'm praying for you. take care

Lisa Feeney-Johann
East Peoria, IL - Sunday, May 13, 2007 6:05 PM CDT

Those Mother's Day cards were amazing.
Zach was always sweet, and you had the right to be so easily proud of him.
Happy Mother's Day Nikki.
Hollie <amydav86@insightbb.com>
North Pekin, IL - Sunday, May 13, 2007 8:50 AM CDT

Happy Mother's Day to one of the most AMAZING mom's that I know!!! We love you Nikki!!! kim & the kids
kim meints
pekin, il usa - Saturday, May 12, 2007 11:59 PM CDT

Hi Nikki- Just wanted to let you know that you and your family are in my thoughts often. Hope that sometime we can "catch up" - time is flying.
Joy Spacht-Ruach <jspachtruach@hotmail.com>
East Peoria, IL U.S.A. - Thursday, May 10, 2007 2:37 PM CDT

Hi! Nikki and family
Just wanted you to know I am thinking & praying for you. Wow! Zach's headstone is awesome! He was an awesome kid! So funny!
Lisa Feeney-Johann <ljohann04@yahoo.com>
East Peoria, IL - Sunday, May 6, 2007 1:53 PM CDT

Thanks for the info. Nik. I'll be in Germany on 26th, but I'll be thinking of you. I plan on doing the walk and the crop. TTYL
Gina
Groveland, IL - Thursday, May 3, 2007 12:33 AM CDT

Thanks for sharing pictures of Zach's headstone. It is absolutely beautiful and very creative. I am sure he would be proud. Please know I think of you and your entire family every day and you all continue to be in my thoughts and prayers.
Michelle Brown and family <brown_Michelle_L@cat.com>
Manito, IL 61546 - Monday, April 30, 2007 8:07 AM CDT

Happy birthday Kylee! Sorry it's a few days late! I have been so busy that my time on the computer has been very short this week... Zachary's headstone is absolutely beautiful! I'm sure it is even better in person! What a special way to show everyone how wonderful he is! I still pray for you all every day! take care~ Kate Hebb and family

Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
- Saturday, April 28, 2007 9:55 PM CDT

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU KYLEE!! love from GA, Gary, Tammy, Justin and Jake.
tammy schoenfeldt <gtschoenfeldt@aol.com>
warner robins, ga - Thursday, April 26, 2007 7:25 PM CDT

Happy Birthday Kaylee!! I hope it was as wonderful as you are sweetie!
I just wanted to write and say that Tomi called Monday and let me know about Zach's stone. AWESOME I loved it. Zach is diffenetly there with us!! I just can't get over how amazing it is. You all did a wonderful job. Thinking of you all everyday.
Jennifer Horchem <riverfanxs496@yahoo.com>
pekin, - Thursday, April 26, 2007 7:06 PM CDT

Happy Birthday Kylee. Enjoy your day. Just wanted to let you know I'm thinking of you. I know your brother will be with you in your heart today.
Gina Booth <gbooth@insightbb.com>
Groveland, IL - Thursday, April 26, 2007 9:34 AM CDT

AWESOME!! I did not tell Kayla about Zach's headstone, I just took her out & showed her!! She really liked it. The picture of Zach with Jesus is amazing...it looks just like Zach!! He really shines through in all the details of the stone. I'm sure that everyone who visits him, will feel like he is right there with them! He IS a teen wonder!! take care & we love you ALL!! kim & the kids
kim meints
pekin, il usa - Wednesday, April 25, 2007 10:39 PM CDT

Nikki~ Thanks for the stories- I think Zach would have gotten along with my Michael(10 years old) REALLY well! But I think there would have been alot of mischief! Ha Ha! This Easter, after "meeting" moms like you- the promise of what this holiday means gives so much hope for what is to come after our life here! Amen? Just wanted to let you know that I think of you often and I also check in more than I write(sorry). Lots of love and prayers~ Kate and family
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Saturday, April 14, 2007 7:23 PM CDT

Nikki:
I was going through old pictures tonight, probably from three or four years ago, and I found a bunch of Zach. I can honestly say that they each made me laugh. Once I scan them, I'll defiantly send them to you because I'm sure they'll put a smile on your face too. The 7th & 8th graders bring him up almost every day...stories or something that reminds us of Zach. He will truly never forgotten.
I also wanted to tell you that Good Shepherd reached our goal for Zach's memorial in Camp Cilca!! It was a proud afternoon for us.

Hollie LandiVittori <liamsflowerchild21@yahoo.com>
North Pekin, IL - Thursday, April 12, 2007 9:44 PM CDT

Hey guys-- I check in and read your thoughts every once in awhile but this is the 1st time I've written. I just want to say thanks for sharing your thoughts with all of us. I enjoy reading them. Your Easter story I have never heard before.Brian help keep Zach in stock with battries I'm thinking?Zach is so special and I'm really glad to have got to spend sometime with him. He's such an awesome kid... You've got to love him. He can make ANYONE laugh and smile too. I tell you reading the stories and knowing him he really has touched my heart.There are things that Kylee does that remind me of Zach but I never say much just cause I don't want to hurt her feelings. But she makes me so PROUD of her and of her brother!! You have such wonderful childern keep up the great work NIKKI your a GREAT mom!!
Jennifer Horchem <riverfanxs496@yahoo.com>
pekin, - Thursday, April 12, 2007 8:27 PM CDT

Happy Easter Nikki, John & Kylee! Great Zach stories..they made me smile! I can tell that your spirits are up & I'm happy for that! Kayla is SOOO excited to start raising money for the St. Jude Run!! Zach will ALWAYS be alive in our hearts & through your wonderful memories..thank you for sharing them!! we love you guys!! kim & the kids
kim meints
pekin, il usa - Sunday, April 8, 2007 2:33 PM CDT

Dear Nikki~ I was thinking about you today and wanted to let you know that I said a little prayer. I hope you Kylee and John have a blessed Easter and please give us another Zachary story soon- I love to hear about how funny and sweet he really was! You are truly blessed with wonderful kids! The apple doesn't fall far from the tree- that's for sure! Take care and have a nice Easter~ Kate
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Saturday, April 7, 2007 9:17 PM CDT

Dearest Nikki,
Jacob and I got home early this morning, after midnight. I am hoping that we didn't miss you somehow. We thought about you and Zach. Zach's presence seems everywhere at St. Jude, at least for me! Jacob's checkup went well and he had clear scans. I know Zach would be tickled pink! :)

I enjoy reading your entries and your stories about Zach. They make him still feel close somehow, and they help me get to know him better. I hope you keep on sharing those stories and talk about him as much as you need to. Jacob and I miss him, and I can't imagine how much you must miss him.

Much love always,
Jen
Jen and Jacob <kjenwhit@verizon.net>
- Friday, April 6, 2007 2:42 PM CDT

Nikki, Kylee and John
Just wanted you to know I am always thinking about you all. Nikki you are the strongest person I know. Kylee have fun on your spring break.
Lisa Johann <ljohann04@yahoo.com>
East Peoria, Il - Sunday, April 1, 2007 12:16 AM CDT

nikki, i was so happy to read your latest entry..it sounds like you are doing better! it's great to "read" the JOY & HOPE in your words!!! Kayla is really starting to look forward to the "Run"...she is going with our youth group to Orlando this summer & we were afraid the dates might overlap with the run, but they don't. Kayla said she would give up the trip to do the run because it means SOOOO much to her to do it for ZACH!!!!!! that was just zach...impacting everyone he knew!!!! love you guys!!!
kim meints
pekin, il usa - Wednesday, March 21, 2007 10:44 PM CDT

Zach, I forgot the most important role MY HERO!!!!!!!!!Oh how I miss you. Love ya plus one! Gramma
Gramma <www.agrammaof7@grics.net>
- Friday, March 16, 2007 11:23 AM CDT

Hi Zachary, Gramma wanted to "talk" to you today, so here I am. I'm really excited. Tonight Mom,Amber, and I are going to a scrapebook night. I'm going to make a book just about you and I can hardly wait. Until I started to go through all my pictures, I didn't realize what a busy life you had. The words to describe you are endless. Some of the most unusual things are limo driver,chef,muscleman, magician, ringbearer, gardener, tree planter, the more I look the more I find. Just really missing you as always. I got some hugs and kisses from you in a dream and that was awesome. Of course, seeing that smile and silly face of yours made me smile as always. Missing you. Love ya plus one, Your favorite gramma in the world.
Gramma <www.agrammaof7@grics.net>
- Friday, March 16, 2007 11:20 AM CDT

hi nikki! I smiled when I read your latest entry..Kayla & I were talking recently about seeing Zach @ wal-mart!! He always made sure he said hi & chatted with us for a bit! I see this little boy each week where I take Mason for speech therapy..he reminds me sooo much of Zach, only he is around 5 or 6 yrs. old. he's adorable, just like Zach!! Kayla's doing well, I know she thinks of Zach & misses him alot! hi john & kylee!! take care & we love you!!
kim meints
pekin, il usa - Sunday, March 11, 2007 5:37 PM CDT

Dear Nikki and Family,

For chapel this month we are collecting money for a memorial at Camp C.I.L.C.A. in honor of Zach. I wanted to let you know that in the first week we have already made $100. Everyone seems very supportive and enthusiastic about it. I'm really proud that we're collecting money to honor such a great guy. I think about Zach daily, he meant a lot to me. I think Zach touched the lives of everyone he met, he was such a perky person and his smile was contagious.

If you have any questions about the memeorial feel free to e-mail and I'll send you my number.
Gabi Dagit <Dramabelle92@yahoo.com>
Pekin, IL - Friday, March 9, 2007 9:13 PM CST

Kylee,
This is Kylee Alexander, I hope you remember me but if not i was in 4th grade with you. I hope you get this. I have been thinkking of your family today a lot. I don't know why though. I guess I just feel like seeing you sometime.
Your Friend,
Kylee Alexander
Kylee <kyluth@yahoo.com>
IL. USA - Sunday, March 4, 2007 8:43 PM CST

Nikki,John & Kylee
Nikki I have been thinking about you and your family. Zack was such a sweet and loveable child. In the short period of time that I knew him. I felt terrible that I couldn't come to his visitiation. We left for vacation the day before. Sending you tons of love and prayers.
Lisa Feeney-Johann <ljohann04@yahoo.com>
East Peoria, IL - Wednesday, February 28, 2007 10:39 PM CST

Hi Nikki, my husband and I attended the Deer/Turkey Classic that was held in Bloomington last weekend. We stopped by the Illinois Bowhunters Society booth and they had a display of pictures of one of their pet projects, the Illinois Kids Dream Hunt. Guess what, they had a picture of Zach in his orange vest standing over his deer that he got one year. We were there helping out that year. And our friend Jim McFarlane was at the booth and we talked about what an amazing kid your Zach was.
Brenda McCarthy <rbmccarthy@casscomm.com>
Virginia, IL - Wednesday, February 28, 2007 8:09 PM CST

Nikki,

I just want you to know that I think of you and your entire family everyday. You all continue to be in my thoughts and prayers.
The Brown Family (friends of Mary Ann Arnold) <brown_michelle_L@cat.com>
Manito, IL - Wednesday, February 21, 2007 9:49 AM CST

Nikki,
Zach was sure who I was thinking of when we watched that movie. Oh, did I ever cry! At the end of the movie, we were walking out and Jarrod said, "mommy, were you crying?" And I said, "you bet I was! Alot!" It was good to see you and John and Kylee. She just keeps getting prettier every day! Thank you for your comments about Kris. I think he's pretty special too!
Mary Ann Vaupel <madk84@grics.net>
Pekin, IL - Tuesday, February 20, 2007 10:38 AM CST

Just checking in~ I was thinking of you today- hope you're all doing well...We're still praying fro you! Take care~ Kate and family
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
- Monday, February 19, 2007 10:53 PM CST

Zachary, I've really been missing you. I always do but sometimes it's more overwhelming than others. Oh to see what you're up to. Remember when we'd sing along with "Big House"? I picture you at the BIG table eating all your favorites and then going out to the BIG yard to play football. Your smile is what keeps me going. Grampa is having a hard time too. Sometimes we just cry together. Don't think that we'd want you back cause I know you're in THE BEST place. A hug, a kiss, a sweet smile would get me by. I'm gonna stay strong for you little buddy but don't ever forget how much I LOVE you and MISS you. Love you plus one, Your favorite gramma in the whole world!!!!!
a gramma of 7 <www.agrammaof7@grics.net>
- Wednesday, February 7, 2007 2:12 PM CST

Hi, you guys this is caressa and marissa just seein what u guys are doin, bye got to go!!!! luv yah!!!!
caressa <juicyfruit081006@yahoo.com>
peoria, il us - Tuesday, February 6, 2007 8:55 PM CST

Nikki, I was so happy to read your entry. You deserve to find some peace. This reminds me of you. "When you have reached the end of all the light you know, and you must step out into the darkness of the unknown, faith is knowing that one of two things will happen: Either you willl have something solid to stand on, or you will be taught how to fly!" Somebody at grandma Diane's church gave us all this at a Christmas Eve service. We all love you. Take care. Tammy
Tammy Schoenfeldt <gtschoenfeldt@aol.com>
Warner Robins, GA - Tuesday, February 6, 2007 6:31 PM CST

~**Hi nikki,zach,jhon,and kylee just wanted to let u guys know i luv u and still care for u and i see u soon and luv u guys sorry we haven`t been callin though but did u watch da bears and vs. colts? GO BEARS!!! even though they lost but marissa voted for the colts againt mom so she could get money but she really voted for the bears!!! luv u get back yo u soon!!!**~ -caressa and marissa-
caressa <juicyfruit081006@yahoo.com>
peoria, il us - Monday, February 5, 2007 1:29 AM CST

Hi Nikki, I'm so glad you found some peace. I can't wait to hear your story. I think about you alot. Stay strong.
Carrie (Chassity's mom) www.caringbridge.org/va/chassity <flintcx4@yahoo.com>
The Plains, va - Friday, February 2, 2007 9:04 PM CST

Rejoicing with you my friend. I miss you!
Jenny Otte
East Peoria, IL - Thursday, February 1, 2007 9:02 PM CST

Hey Nikki! I have been thinking about Zach ALOT latley. It just now hit me. Miss him alot, I remember when he brought snickerdoodles to school. I had no clue what a snickerdoodle was until he told me they were the greatest cookie ever. haha. I just wanted you guy to know how much i love and miss zach. Tell Kylee I said hi and give her a hug for me.
Love you guys!

Katie McDonough <legallyblonde78@hotmail.com>
Pekin, IL US - Thursday, February 1, 2007 8:35 PM CST

Nikki,
I certainly remember how much fun Kristopher had when he got to go places with Zach. You really made him feel like one of the family! At Zach's graduation I thanked Zach for being such a good friend to Kristopher. I told him that once in a lifetime friends are the ones that let you be who you really are, and never have to act differently when you are around them. Kristopher had that with Zach, and its something we talk about now. As he grows as a teenager, he will see that some people won't think you are "cool" unless you act a certain way. He will learn that means they aren't truly a good friend, if they make you feel that you have to act differently. He always stayed true to himself around Zach, goofy, girl crazy and all! I am so grateful to have had Zach be that kind of friend in Kristopher's life.
Mary Ann Vaupel <madk84@grics.net>
Pekin, IL USA - Tuesday, January 30, 2007 4:24 PM CST

Hi,

I happened to read your son's story on the cb websites while making a donation. I was so touched by it that I had to sign the guestbook.

I am so sorry for your loss and for all the pain Zachary went through with this disease. From what you wrote, he certainly was a special, beautiful child. You must miss him so much. He's an angel now and God is taking excellent care of him until you meet again.

Sincerely,
Mrs. Cynthia Durgin
Cynthia Durgin <Cindee@aol.com>
Milltown, NJ 08850 - Wednesday, January 24, 2007 10:48 PM CST

Hi Nikki! I had forgotten all about the e-mail that I sent to you so long ago. Zach touched so many people's lives and we all love him and miss him terribly! I hope you are doing alright and I hope your family is too! I just stopped by to tell you that I was thinking about you and your family..
Sending my love,
Alyssa

Alyssa Lewellen <Aballerina5678@sbcglobal.net>
East Peoria, IL - Wednesday, January 24, 2007 8:06 PM CST

Hi Nikki - I found this and thought of you.
Prayer for Those Who Mourn
Almighty God, Father of all mercies and giver of all comfort: Deal graciously, we pray thee, with those who mourn, that casting every care on thee, they may know the consolation of thy love, through Jesus Christ our Lord.

Christian source: Book of Common Prayer 1979
Lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
UK - Saturday, January 20, 2007 2:17 PM CST

Hello Nikki,
Just wanted you to know I think about you all the time. I now can truly understand what your going thru. It's the worst feeling ever but the memories keep us going and what our kids expected from us when they left. They wanted us to be happy. So I have to try my best to give that to Chass. I think Zach would want the same for you too. Maybe this spring I might do a road trip and maybe we can meet somewhere.
Carrie <flintcx4@yahoo.com>
The Plains, Va - Friday, January 19, 2007 11:22 AM CST

Thanks for the memories Nikki! Oh how I wish I could have met Zachary! You were truly blessed! Such a funny kid even when he didn't mean to be! Hahaha! I am so sorry that you had such a rough time with the decorations... That must have been hard! You take care and know that I still check in and pray for you~ Kate
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Thursday, January 18, 2007 4:56 PM CST

I smiled when I read your entry about the Christmas card.. I remember that you guys came home to a decorated house last Christmas-a big surprise for all of you!! Keep your spirits up & enjoy your family & all that 2007 brings to you!! Kayla is SOOOO looking forward to doing the St. Jude Run for Zach this year!!! Tim & Amber, are you still "in" too??!! Love you guys!!!!! Kim & the Kids!
kim meints
pekin, il usa - Wednesday, January 17, 2007 9:19 PM CST

Nikki,
Your struggle continues to touch my heart deeply! I loved the story about the fried chicken. I can almost imagine the face you describe! Just wanted you to know that we are still keeping you all in our hearts and prayers!
Mary Ann Vaupel
Pekin, IL - Friday, January 5, 2007 11:28 AM CST

Happy New Year, John, Nikki, & Kylee!! My wish for you in 2007 is to stay on your path with God, look to Him for all of your strength, grow together as a family, have your hearts mended & more happy times than sad. Of course, Zach will be in your thoughts & part of your life each & every day!! I know he would want all 3 of you to be happy. Thanks be to God for all of the time that he gave Zach here to touch so many hearts!!I know Kayla still struggles with him being gone. She even commented about 2 days before Christmas, "this is the WORST Christmas ever!"We all could use a lot more happy times in 2007! I am so happy to hear that you & john were able to get away & have time together!! We love you guys!!~~Kim, Kayla, Nick & Mason
kim meints
pekin, il usa - Monday, January 1, 2007 11:01 AM CST

McKenzie Bigliazzi
Pekin, IL USA - Saturday, December 30, 2006 4:11 PM CST

My sweet Zachary, How everyone missed you at Christmas as we do on EVERY single day. It was especially hard not to be able to get some Christmas kisses and hugs from you, but I felt your presence. I know that will have to do until I join you in heaven. My thoughts were with you every single minute and wondering how you were celebrating. Of courst, I'm sure you celebrate continually just being in the light of the Great I AM! How awesome for you. I just wanted you to know that grampa and I send our love and many kisses each day to you. Being with Jesus you probably don't need them but we need to send them. I love you and want to thank you for the video you made last Christmas. It was wonderful but emotional. All the boys kept wanting to watch "again" . Not sure how many times mom replayed it. See ya soon little buddy. Your favorite gramma in the whole world!!!!
gramma <www.agrammaof7@grics.net>
- Wednesday, December 27, 2006 1:33 PM CST

Nikki and Family:

I just want to wish you a Merry Christmas. I hope that the New Year brings you much happiness and better times.
Jennifer
Toronto, Ontario Canada - Monday, December 25, 2006 4:12 PM CST

Nikki,
Just thought I would finally sign in.
I read your journals alot, they help me. I loved the Christmas story, had to copy it and pass along to my friends & family.
I'm finally back to work, that helps me and she just got a new dog around Easter time, it helps me to have him.
When I think I'm doing good, then it will hit me.
Can't wait to I have the pleasure and time to meet you. Talk later
Patti and my angel Miss Miranda
patti <patypooh_57@yahoo.com>
streator, il - Saturday, December 23, 2006 1:57 PM CST

Hi Nikki

I hope you can find the strength to have the best family Christmas you possibly can in the circumstances - Zach fills your heart so he'll fill your Christmas. Love and prayers for you all at this very hard time of the year.
Lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
UK - Saturday, December 23, 2006 11:39 AM CST

Dear Zach,
I just wanted you to know how much we miss you. We miss you really, really, really bad. We want to be able to hang out with you again, play video games, go to Lazer Tag, glow in the dark mini golf, and Jillian's. Thank you for coming into our lives.

Love,
Jacob and his mom
Jen and Jacob <kjenwhit@verizon.net>
- Saturday, December 23, 2006 10:13 AM CST

Dearest Nikki,
I wanted to let you know that I'm thinking of you, as always. My heart aches for you at how much you miss Zach. No one else can really understand exactly what you are going through, but I hope that the love of family and friends will help support you through this season. It's hard to feel joy and happiness when your heart is so heavy with grief and loss. I pray you will be gentle with yourself and that our Savior's precious spirit will be with you in a very special way somehow.

I wish Kylee could get her wish. I started crying when I read that and kept crying. Still am. What you said about how things look from the outside isn't exactly how it feels on the inside was a beautiful statement and a reminder to the rest of us to be extra gentle and loving to those we know who have lost loved ones.

Jacob and I were at St. Jude December 4. I thought of Zach everywhere, as I always do when we are there. Jacob's scans were clear. I can almost see Zach's big smile when we would tell him the news. He was always so happy for other kids even when he was having a rough time. What a HUGE heart he had!

Jacob had surgery at Duke last week, and he and I were down there for a week. So, I didn't get any cards out this year! I just wanted you to know that you are being thought of, prayed for, and loved.

Love,
Jen
Jen Whitmer <kjenwhit@verizon.net>
VA - Saturday, December 23, 2006 10:10 AM CST

I know how you feel, we miss Anthony so much, and I guess it's just the little things too. I had no ambition to put up the christmas tree, but I thought just how much Anthony believed in Christmas and how he would be mad at me for acting this way. So be brave and have fun as if Zach was still with you, because if you think about it, he still is.

If you are feeling sad missing Zach this Christmas, think of this;
Zach is sorry he cannot be with you for Christmas this year, but somebody had already invited him to a very special birthday party on that day.

Hang in there kid, Zach's in a great place!
Michael and Robin Ford
(Anthony's mom and dad)
Michael and Robin Ford <mrford@hickorytech.net>
Mankato, MN USA - Thursday, December 21, 2006 11:01 PM CST

I said a prayer for you today! I asked God to make this bearable for you and that you will feel stronger each day and hold the memories close to your heart and somehow find a way to make new ones! I cannot imagine even getting up every day... but I hope it helps to know that we are praying for you during yet another rough period of time! Lots of love from our home to your's~ Kate Hebb and family
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Thursday, December 21, 2006 10:46 PM CST

Nikki,
Our family is also dealing with such emotions this holiday season. My mother suddenly passed on 12/7 after suffering a massive heartattack. The one thing that helps me get through is knowing that she and Zach are having the ULTIMATE christmas with Jesus! We are heading to Disney in January. Alyssa received her Sunshine Foundation Wish Trip,s so we are heading out January 18th. I think I am most looking forward to spending some time with both kids away from stress!
We are wishing you and your family a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!
Stephanie Lewellen (Alyssa's mom) <balletmom5@sbcglobal.net>
Peoria, IL USA - Thursday, December 21, 2006 12:01 AM CST

I laid in bed last night thinking and worrying about all that I didn�t have done for Christmas. Then my thoughts turned to you and your family, and how very different this Christmas will be for all of you. It made me recall last year�s Christmas so well. It was Christmas Eve, and already dark, but Kristopher wanted to drop off Zach�s present. Kristopher had gotten Zach just a small framed picture of them together at Zach�s birthday party at the theater. It meant a lot to Kristopher, although it was small.
At first we were hesitant to stop by, being Christmas Eve, and knowing how families can be so busy on that night, but we pulled up to your house, and let Kristopher run in. We watched through the window, and I will never, ever forget it. I can still see Zach standing up and talking to Kris as he opened the gift. Then there was the hug. And then my tears started and would not stop! It was almost like a gift, to see it through the window. Not hearing their words, just watching them together on Christmas Eve, and seeing the love there, was so overwhelming. With all of our emotions so fragile this time of year, I wanted to share that with you, so you would know that we also think of Zach and the friendship between those two special boys! We pray that the spirit of Christmas finds its way into your hearts this year, and that a little of its magic visits Kylee.
Hugs to you all!

Mary Ann Vaupel <madk84@grics.net>
Pekin, IL USA - Tuesday, December 19, 2006 8:51 AM CST

Nikki~ It is through tears that I am writing! I cannot and will not even try to imagine how you are feeling at this time of year! And Kylee... What a little doll! Ughhhh! I am sure she is having a rough time! I want you to know that I still pray for you every day! And check for updates... Give Kylee an extra big hug and tell her it is from someone in Pennsylvania who has really grown to love her and PRAY for her- Well- I have to run to the store... Just remember that you are loved! Love and prayers~ kate
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Friday, December 15, 2006 5:18 PM CST

Nikki---please give Kylee a huge hug for me.
I always pray for you guys and am thinking of you.
All my love,

Hollie <liamsflowerchild21@yahoo.com>
North Pekin, IL - Thursday, December 14, 2006 7:19 PM CST

Hi Nikki. Just wanted to let you know I was checking in on you...I'm thinking of you every day. Call me soon.
Gina
Groveland, IL - Tuesday, December 12, 2006 4:14 PM CST

Twas the Night before Christmas

Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house, Not a creature was stirring not even a mouse, The stockings were hung by the chimney with care, But to many children's stockings will be missing this year,

These children are heaven's ^i^Angels^i^ all snug up in their beds, Their parents can only dream of them dancing in their heads, These children all fought hard battles and stood strong, So why oh why did they have to leave our homes,

Whether it be from Cancer, Bad Hearts, Bad Livers or Damaged Lungs, getting stuck with Needles, having Surgeries, and Chemo, Then there's the Central Lines and Transplants to Checking their Counts, And it changes and shatters so many of our lives, We new in a moment they might fall a sleep and to start a New Journey being Pain free,

God spoke not a word and went straight to work, As he new he would be there to fill our Angels Hearts with Peace, Comfort and Love, And up from above the Angels did rise soaring through Heaven on a Magical Ride,

These little ^i^Angels^i^ soaring so high are the stars in the night lighting up our skies, Each with a name and they shine so bright, First there's Navada, Max, Kadin, and Gage, along with Shelby then there's, Skyler, Cassidy, and Jake, then comes AARON with ZACH and oh just to many to name... So lets Please oh Please find some cures so our Little ^i^Angels^i^ wont have to soar up up and away to leave us to morn,

Before our ^i^Angels^i^ soared out of sight, I heard them all exclaim "Happy Christmas To All, And To All A Good-Night, And Lets Not Forget To Keep Fighting This Fight In Finding The Cures We So Desperately Need!"

By: Sue Jeffries

I came across this on another site, and thought you might like this.
Holli Goss <3goss@insightbb.com>
Pekin, IL - Monday, December 11, 2006 5:23 PM CST

Just letting you know that I am here praying for you ! Ever since the first time I came across this site- you have had a special place in my heart! Zach was so special and I am sure tha apple didn't fall far from the tree! You are a very special person Nikki~ One that has left a lasting impression on my heart! I will continue to keep you and Kylee and John lifted before the Lord! Love from Coatesville, Pa~ Kate
Kate hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Thursday, December 7, 2006 10:16 PM CST

Hey Nikki! Yesterday morning I was watching the news and heard about a train derailing over by the Rock Church. I started laughing (it was only soy beans) because of Zack putting the penney on those same tracks after church then going to find his flattened penny the following week.
You are looking really good. I'm really proud of you. I miss being able to talk Zach into stuff when he wouldn't want to listen to anyone else. I was reminded of that yesterday when Tomi brought up sledding. Lasttime we went he wouuld not wear his brace. For some reason he always listened to me. I'm sure he probally thought of me as more of a big sister than an Aunt. Tell Kylee and John that I love them.
Amber <amber@abelvault.com>
Manito, IL - Tuesday, December 5, 2006 1:24 PM CST

Zachary, You are missed sooooooo much but I know you are free with JESUS!!!! Running,jumping, & eating without being sick. That really comforts me, but I will always long to hold you and see that funny little grin where your one eyebrow goes up. All I have to do is close my eyes and I have a vivid picture. I have all the ornaments that you made over the years and bought for me and grampa. What a treasure we have. I wouldn't get rid of them for all the money in the world. You will be in my heart til I see you in heaven someday then we will really celebrate!!!!! What a grand party we'll have. Even though you won't be with us in body during Christmas we will feel your wonderful spirit and "see" your smile. Love you my dear Zachary. See ya soon. Gramma Love you plus one always and forever
P.S. Just a short note to Judy in Montana. Thank you ever so much for looking into "the life of Zachary". If only you could of met him in person. He was and is an awesome young boy, never to be forgotten. THANKS and Merry Christmas and many blessings
your favorite gramma in the whole world <www.agrammaof7@grics.net>
- Tuesday, December 5, 2006 12:38 AM CST

wow!!!! is all i can say!! what judy did how amazing!! it brought tears sooo many tears!! i wish i could of been there to see it!! zach im sure was in awww!! what amzing people in the world. zach, this makes me even more blessed to know i have u in my life and able to be ur aunt!! u trully are an amazing person!! MY NEPHEW!! i cant wait to see u buddy. ohh and by the way im needing some sweet zach dreams. latley my dreams are a little wierd!! well i love ya buddy and cant wait to see ya again!! OHH AND THANK U JUDY !!!
aunt mandi <justus3deakins@sbcglobal.net>
- Tuesday, December 5, 2006 10:28 AM CST

Dear Nikki, Kylee, and John,
Greetings from Montana. Yes, you and your Zachary have a broad reach. I have spent so much time with you all through your website over the past few months that I thought it would be good to let you know how much I have cried and laughed with you. You see, I am a nursing student. We chose children from the Caringbridge website on whom to center a series of projects. Zach's website was the first one I randomly looked at and have been immersed in your story ever since. If grief can be shared, I hope mine can somehow lift some of yours, even from across the country. Part of our assignment was to present a creative project that would give our classmates a glimpse of the effect Zach's illness had on him and you as a family. Knowing Zach, I sure didn't want his presentation to be boring, so... we started by playing basketball. We had a shootout in the classroom using home made backboards (a blue and orange one, of course), with Zach's theme song blasting in the background. Then, (i hope this is OK) pictures from your website were projected onto a screen (about 15 of them) while I tried to describe your lives the last few years. Candles were lit (a friend of mine told me once that a lit candle invites a spirit). Prefacing each statement with "this is a boy who....", I borrowed statements from your journal entries from when you started in 2004 to the present. As hoped, all were laughing and smiling when playing ball (this is how I see Zachary), and all shared tears of sorrow and empathy for Zachary and your family.
Thank you, Nikki, for sharing everything that you have. I have been soooo touched and blessed by you, Zach, Kylee, Kris, and John. Beautiful photos!! What a smile!!
Lots of Love and Prayers from Montana:) Judy B.

Judy Baker <JJJC@bresnan.net>
Great Falls, MT USA - Monday, December 4, 2006 1:29 PM CST

Nikki,
The story about the mask made me laugh! I don't remember where we were going, but it was cold and we all picked Zach up at your house, and he came out with the mask on. When we got to where we were going, he got out of the van without it, and me, all concerned, said, "Zach, don't you need your mask?" He just looked at me, smiled, and said, "No, not all the time, just once in a while". What a cutie! Fooled me anyway!
Mary Ann Vaupel
Pekin, IL USA - Sunday, December 3, 2006 8:48 PM CST

Nikki,
I think of you all the time. And of Zach. We recently went on a big trip to Paris and then to London. We still hope that Jacob will get his Disney Make a Wish, but we made our own for now. And not everyone agreed with us about spending the money. But you know what?!? I thought of YOU and ZACH and how you made every day fun, every day full of good memories. And I know we did the right thing. I don't know if you realize what a difference you and Zach make in people's lives. He is still changing the world, one heart at a time. And so are you.

I miss you. I miss Zach. Sometimes I like to pretend too, Nikki. I wish we could all get together and go play some Laser Tag or go get some Mexican food together. Just to see you and Zach both again.

With all my love,
Jen, Jacob's mom
Jen Whitmer <kjenwhit@verizon.net>
VA - Saturday, December 2, 2006 7:15 PM CST

hi zach this is ashley. you do not know me but i hope you have fun with god. Good Job! Zach.
Ashley Wubben <Nanna1@grics.net>
Pekin , Ill America - Saturday, December 2, 2006 5:29 PM CST

zach,
evry time i think about what exactly you are doing up there,( or who really knows if its up) and what exactlly its like i get sick to my stomach. i know what the bible says on some of the things, but theres alot we dont know. on thanksgiving we sat in grandmas and grandpas living room listening to grandpas vision he got, and it brought me alot of unanswered questions( i think the same was for your mom) i want to know when your around me, and can you really do that? can you look down on us and see what were doing(when were sad, happy,...) all i have is just believing. but in a way that aint enough sometimes. i want to know FOR SURE! is that greedy of me? and i know heaven is a wonderful place and so much better here on earth, but if you could of had that one last miracle of being healed FOREVER what whould you have done. and why couldnt you have gotten it. (which is my 1st question when i get to heaven. and why it had to happen to you) i know god has his reasons and plans for all of us, but we still dont know. and i think that is why we are al sooo deeply grieving and longing to be with you. yoyu are one amazing person zach!! and i love you sooo much!!
aunt mandi <justus3deakins@sbcglobal.net>
- Tuesday, November 28, 2006 10:23 AM CST

Hey Guys.
This is the time of year i miss Zach the most. My fondest memory was raking leaves with him. Making big piles just so Carson & Kylee could mess them up. =D I sure do miss him. This whole thing has inspired me. This may sound a bit rediculous, but I wrote a song about him. I can make a copy of the lyrics for you if you'd like. I think its pretty good, for my experience as a poem wirter =/ I was reading the journal about how you have to approve the front or something & i started balling. I miss him so much. If kylee needs anything I"m here for her.
McKenzie Bigliazzi.
Pekin, IL USA - Sunday, November 26, 2006 11:20 PM CST

hi nikki, john & kylee!! i,too, have not typed for awhile but i check in on you! you are all in my thoughts this time of year, i know it's going to be very hard for all of you. just spend the holiday like zach would have wanted you to..being happy. i know that you have other issues going on right now & i will keep you in my prayers. you have to stay strong in your faith & trust in God always. kayla says they are learning about cancer in health class right now & she said mom, it's so hard to sit there. i think about zach & i start to cry & i want to get up & leave the room. he made such an impact on all of his friends. we love you guys!! kim, kayla, nick & mason
kim <meints5@msn.com>
pekin, il usa - Sunday, November 26, 2006 8:31 PM CST

Hi Nikki

I just wanted to wish you all a happy thanksgiving. I know it will be terribly hard but you know Zach will want you to celebrate. My love and prayers go to you all, and to Kris who is going to find the holidays hard without his best bud. Hi to you Kris. Love and prayers.
Lisa Burt <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
UK - Thursday, November 23, 2006 3:11 AM CST

Nikki,
I haven't left a message for a while, but I still check this page a couple of times a day, just to get my "daily dose" of Zach. That picture of Zach and Kris together never fails to give me a lump in my throat. Those sparkling eyes and smile! I have e-mailed some friends to visit the Lunch for Life site, and sent a picture of Zach and Kris together in my e-mail, hoping that seeing that wonderful kid and what neuroblastoma took from all of us, might inspire them to donate. But even if they don't actually donate, I felt like making them aware of it was a little something, anyway.

Kristopher is seeing so many commercials for video games on tv now and there was one especially (I can't think of the name of it) that he said "Zach would want that". I guess it was another game like Zach had already owned. Then he gets quiet. Then he talks about how quick Zach got through one level, like I would know, naturally, just how hard that one level was! We are missing him too. Keeping you all in our hearts and prayers!
Mary Ann Vaupel
Pekin, IL - Wednesday, November 22, 2006 10:30 AM CST

Nikki I'm so sorry that Zach's passing is still leaving you so raw - if it isn't too personal, have you thought about professional councilling, it might make it a little bit more bearable with Christmas coming. You and Zach are always in my prayers, stay strong Nikki, as strong as Zach. Love and prayers.
Lisa Burt <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
England - Tuesday, November 21, 2006 12:17 AM CST

Nikki---
I hadn't visited the page in quite some time. This fall has been really crazy. When I got to the poem in the journal history I started crying. I had to walk away from the computer and when I came back I read what you had wrote. It breaks my heart to think about the day he gave me that bracelet. I have worn my "Zach" bracelet ever since the day he went to heaven. I had to get a new band for the charms, but I keep the same charms on it that Zach gave me. When I'm having a rough day I look at my bracelet and I know that Zach is smiling and wishing he could say something smart to cheer me up. I will never forget Zach and the love he showed me. Nikki, your son taught me so much.

Thank you---Gabi Dagit
Gabi Dagit <Dramabelle92@yahoo.com>
Pekin , IL - Saturday, November 18, 2006 5:42 PM CST

Nikki~ I still check your site every day but I have gotten really bad at writing! I just want you to know that I still pray for you every day and I cannot imagine how this time of year must be for you! You will be in my prayers every day though! As a mom of a ten year old boy- the whole PS3 thing has got me feeling you tonight! I did not stand (or camp) in line for days but it would be my son's dream to have it as it was Zachary's! Well- I have you covered in prayer each day- you take care~ kate
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Friday, November 17, 2006 9:08 PM CST

Hey there WOMAN!!!!! I just got your message when I went to lunch. Just wanted to let you know sorry but yes I am working as always:) I did start me new brach on Monday and boy was it nice to be somewhere I was totally appreciated. Well guess I will talk to you soon. I will call you hopefully sometime this weekend.
Marilyn Mommy to 3 AMAZING boys <stjudemomma74@aol.com or www.caringbridge.org/il/aarondhunter>
Peoria , il usa - Friday, November 17, 2006 2:41 PM CST

Thinking of you all (as always.)
Joy Spacht-Ruach <jspachtruach@hotmail.com>
East Peoria, IL 61611 - Wednesday, November 15, 2006 2:16 PM CST

Hang in there this time of year. As a Mom I cannot imgaine what pain you are in. I can't wait to read about the positives you are doing with your pain. You are a wonderful person! Take it easy.
Gina Barnes <ginabarnes@comcast.net>
Olney, MD - Friday, November 10, 2006 9:59 PM CST

Oh I forgot to remind you today is Aunt Mandi's 30th Bday. I'm sure you wouldn't forget anyway so I'm not sure why I'm reminding you. Oh, well I'm still as goofy as always!! Love ya bud!!!!
G <www.agrammaof7@grics.net>
- Friday, November 10, 2006 8:16 AM CST

Zach, It's me "your favorite grandma in the whole world". I so miss you and long for your smile and hugs. You'd be proud of your mama. She's doing a great job where she works(helping others). God is getting her through and helping her change into a new life. That's what it seems like for us. We all think of every moment as "before Zach & after Zach went to be with Jesus". Not a day or hour goes by without me thinking of you Zachary. You were and still are my hero. Every time I have to confront something I don't want to, I think of you and your Courage. Mom and I are getting along better than ever. You would be so proud of us. I think your Mom finally understands just how much grampa and I love her. She has a very thick head and doesn't realize just how special she has always been to us. It's because she's way too hard on herself. I've been working hard back at my old job and I talk about you whenever I get a chance. They still remember the day you came and helped out. How could they not remember that wonderful smile and kind ways!!!!!!! Always loving and missing you deeply. Love you plus one!!!!!

gramma <www.agrammaof7@grics.net>
- Friday, November 10, 2006 8:13 AM CST

sis,
i love u soo much. i can really tell this is the right job for u. and i can see why. if ya need anything while john is gone lrt me know. wed. i have off. i was wondering if ya feellike doing something. (shopping)!! well ill get a hold of ya later to find out what ur schedule is like. i had a bad nightmare last night. ill have ta tell ya later about it. but i was having such a hard time going going back to sleep, but zach memories helped me. hes such an amazing little man!! i sure do miss him. and the birthday card u got connor had me teary eyed!! how hard that must have been. well i love ya sis. (zach: give ur mom some awsome zach dreams exspecially right now she sure is needing some)!! i love ya buddy!!
aunt mandi <justus3deakins@sbcglobal.net>
- Monday, November 6, 2006 10:17 AM CST

Nikki, Everytime I read your entries my heart aches for you. Try not to feel bad that you can't be everything everyone wants or needs you to be. You have a right to be sad. Just keep trying and praying. I believe that when the time is right God will help you go on. You are right you have Kylee and John and I know that you thank God for that. We are all keeping you in our prayers. Love, Tammy
Tammy Schoenfeldt <gtschoenfeldt@aol.com>
warner robins, GA - Tuesday, October 31, 2006 7:56 PM CST

Hey Nikki:
I visited Zach tonight for a little while with my Dad and the sod really makes it look nice. I can't wait for the head stone to come in---it'll look perfect---exactly what Zach deserves.
Hollie <amydav86@insightbb.com>
North Pekin, IL - Friday, October 27, 2006 6:12 PM CDT

I read this on another site, and immediatley thought of you and the pain you are feeling. I guess what you are is homesick at this time.

Homesick!!
You're in a better place, I've heard a thousand times
And at least a thousand times I've rejoiced for you
But the reason why I'm broken, the reason why I cry
Is how long must I wait to be with you

I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
I've never been more homesick than now

Help me Lord cause I don't understand your ways
The reason why I wonder if I'll ever know
But, even if you showed me, the hurt would be the same
Cause I'm still here so far away from home

I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
I've never been more homesick than now

In Christ, there are no goodbye
And in Christ, there is no end
So I'll hold onto Jesus with all that I have
To see you again
To see you again

And I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
Won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
Won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

I've never been more homesick than now

author unknown

Holli Goss <3goss@insightbb.com>
Pekin , IL - Wednesday, October 25, 2006 6:47 PM CDT

What an awesome poem and what a wonderful dream!!!! I love the pics - Zach always made everyone smile! What a guy! I miss him too!! I love all of you! Take care, Love Aunt Mary Ann
maryann <maryann61554@yahoo.com>
- Tuesday, October 24, 2006 8:45 PM CDT

Nikki,
Just stopping in to let you know that we are thinking of you all. As always, keeping the family in our prayers and hearts!
Mary Ann
Mary Ann Vaupel <madk84@grics.net>
Pekin, IL - Monday, October 23, 2006 8:42 AM CDT

Hello my precious friends,
I hope your week is going good. You are on my heart and mind constantly lately. I have praying for GOD's peace and comfort and especially HIS strength for you.
In HIS grip,
Phyllis
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Wednesday, October 18, 2006 10:15 PM CDT

nikki that is a awsome poem. it all makes soo much sense. god works in mysterious ways. as a kid growing up in a christian home that is one thing i remember hearing ALOT of!! so seeing u go through this(and all of us) that is the thing i always ran through my mind. this what god has in store for us. there is a reason for this. GOD is working his mysterious ways in our lives right now. exspecially yours!! i love you soo much sis. i just wish i could get to be with you alot more. maybe some day ill get to move closer to MY family!!LOL well take care sis. tell kylee and john i love them too.
aunt mandi/little sis <justus3deakins@sbcglobal.net>
- Tuesday, October 17, 2006 10:53 AM CDT

Connor had to wear his Zachary(shirt) today. He reminds me of Zach in so many ways. Espically when it comes to Tartar Sauce =). We got a new frame lastnight for Zachs picture. I think one of the boys may have broken the old one kissing it.
Well i'm looking forward to going next weekend. Zach will be happy. Remember at GBL when he kept telling us that we needed to go to a movie together. So he'll really be happy that we are spending the whole weekend together. Really this will be the first time we have done anything together beside going to Krogers once. Well I hope you guys have a good weekend. I love you! Tell John & Kylee the same.
Amber <amber@abelvault.com>
- Friday, October 13, 2006 2:54 PM CDT

Nikki,

Thank you so much for sharing so much of your Zach with us. I wish that I had had the privelege of meeting him. You are such a special person. Please remember that you, John and Kylee are constantly in my prayers. Have a great evening.
In HIS grip,
Phyllis
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Thursday, October 12, 2006 8:49 PM CDT

Zach was a beautiful person inside and out (hope he wouldn't mind me calling him beautiful---haha) but I just wanted you to know that I'm thinking of you guys and missing Zach.
Love---Hollie <liamsflowerchild21@yahoo.com>
North Pekin, IL - Thursday, October 12, 2006 4:52 PM CDT

boy sis some rough holidays coming up!! were here for ya. alot more extra tears!! i just wish... i dont know its just hard!! and i agree kylee sur is changing. shes sooo tall. you can tell she knows it too. u look at her and she kinda grins and says WHAT!! well i luv you guys!! we should do something on halloween. i asked to get off work extra early.
aunt mandi <justus3deakins@sbcglobal.net>
- Thursday, October 12, 2006 10:10 AM CDT

Nikki,
Just wanted you to know how much I enjoy looking at the pictures you have posted. I click on this webpage frequently during the day at work, and it makes me smile each time I see the pictures of Kris and Zach together.
I think of them together and laughing the way they did - you know... the kind of laugh between the both of them when they shared some joke or comment that they didn't want to share with the rest of us! I am so glad that Kristopher had that kind of friend and confidante` in Zachary.
We miss him and love you guys!

Mary Ann Vaupel
Pekin, IL - Wednesday, October 11, 2006 11:58 AM CDT

Hey Nikki, sorry to hear that you're having a hard week. But I think I have something for you to read that'll cheer you up. It's from a song called "Mountains" by Lonestar(it's country but it's good)

There are times in life when you gotta crawl,
Lose your grip, trip and fall
When you can't lean on no-one else:
That's when you find yourself
I've been around and I've noticed that,
Walkin's easier when the road is flat
Them danged ol' hills'll get you every time
Yeah, the good Lord gave us mountains,
So we could learn how to climb

Hopefully this'll cheer you up some

Kris Vaupel <whitetail518@yahoo.com>
Pekin, IL United States - Wednesday, October 4, 2006 5:53 PM CDT

Nikki,

Please know you and your entire family continue to be my daily thoughts and prayers. I lost my dad on August 4 to lung cancer (he never smoked a day in his life). Your words are a comfort knowing that what my mom, sister and I are going through are similiar. Especially for my mom, she says it seems likes it gets tougher every day instead of easier. Reading Zach's website often gave me a lot of faith (and peace)throughout the last couple of years, and I appreciate it very much. Thinking of you every day. God bless each of you.
Michelle Brown <brown_michelle_L@cat.com>
Manito, IL - Wednesday, October 4, 2006 8:09 AM CDT

Nikki,
Please know that we are praying for GOD to ease this hurt. I know how it is with my mom so I can't even imagine it being my son. I am praying that GOD's strength, peace and grace can comfort you this week. You are not alone in this walk.

Love in CHRIST,
Phyllis
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Tuesday, October 3, 2006 9:15 PM CDT

nikki---
wow! those pictures of the gsls "harvest" (holloween) party bring back so many memories. zach looked great that day. we were all really happy to see him that day too. my grandfather passed away from oral cancer on sept. 22. he was 62. i bet he told zach we miss and love him for us.

keeping you in our prayers,
with love---gabi dagit and family
Gabrielle Dagit <Dramabelle92@yahoo.com>
Pekin, IL - Monday, October 2, 2006 5:18 PM CDT

Nikki,
The insight you have is remarkable. I wish you could see yourself as others see you. Your recognition of Zach not having to be the man of the house once John came into your life, and knowing that Zachary had a way of giving you advice... don't you see he got that from you? All of us, sitting out here, reading your updates, unable to really fully comprehend the depth of your grief, still see that what made Zachary special came from YOU! And God blessed you with such special insight and compassion. I am just awed by you. Even when you are at your saddest, stricken with grief, you display such insight to how Zach became Zach, and what he meant to everyone. Yes, he was one very, very special guy, a gift from God, but then so you were you, Nikki, to be chosen to have such a Gift, and to bear the burden of that loss. I bet you may not see yourself that way, but we do.

We continue to pray that God eases your grief and replaces despair with hope, day by day.
Mary Ann Vaupel <madk84@grics.net>
Pekin, IL - Monday, October 2, 2006 4:59 PM CDT

Hi Nikki - I'm sorry things are so hard for you - and as for Zach's bio-dad sticking his nose in now, urgh! Take comfort from the fact that Zach is no longer hurting...if you could have just one more hug, that one more hug would never be enough. I'm trying to tell myself that right now about my husband - I long to see him to hold him...but one visit would never be enough. I'm trying to trust God and be patient and believe, I'm really trying to believe that we will be reunited one day. My love and prayers go out to you. Keep you chin up, Zach is fine...
Lisa Burt <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
UK - Monday, October 2, 2006 6:24 AM CDT

John, Nikki, & Kylee,
I hope you have had a wonderful weekend. You were definetly lifted up in prayer. I pray for you a peaceful and restful week.
Love in CHRIST,
Phyllis

Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Sunday, October 1, 2006 8:47 PM CDT

Hey there guys!!!! Just wanted to stop by and say thank all of you soooo much yesterday being with you guys all your family and Kris and his family was much needed. Even though it was stressful it was nice to ear all the awesome stories about Zach and how he comes to them and their HAPPY memories!!!! I know just how all of you feel I miss Our LiL Superhero Forever soooo much but I know he is completely healed in HEAVEN with JESUS his bestest friend. Anyway thanks for letting me keep Kylee last night it was much needed. Not just for me but for the boys too. These siblings of our AWESOME kids need that time together. Hope you and John had fun at the "weinie" roast!!!! Well just know Nikki I am only a phone call away for anything(and I mean anything)!!!! Talk to you all soon. Oh yeah John thanks for having such BIG shoulders Nikki needs you now more than ever THANK YOU!!!!!
Marilyn Mommy to Our LiL Superhero Forever Aaron <stjudemomma74@aol.com or www.caringbridge.org/il/aarondhunter>
Peoria , IL USA - Saturday, September 30, 2006 11:45 AM CDT

Dear zack happy birthday so how are you doing and I hop you git well .Well I have to go so then biy
git well sone
Taryn Thomas <pmitchel@molineschools.org>
Moline, IL usa - Friday, September 29, 2006 10:28 AM CDT

Nikki, John, & Kylee,
What a wonderful story.....I have a similar one for after my mom passed and my 3 yr old son heard her on a video. It was so neat and sad at the same time. Guys, I wish that I had words for you, I don't. My heart hurts and breaks for all of you. I know that there is a giant void in your lives. Please remember that we are in prayer for you constantly. And you are never far from our hearts and thoughts.

Love in CHRIST,
Phyllis
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, ms - Thursday, September 28, 2006 9:54 PM CDT

What a lovely moving surprise for you to hear Zachs voice. I have a DVD with a few mins of Ronnie on it filmed at the model engineering society open day last year. He's explaining how he's going to convert an electric model boat to steam power...of course he never did. The boat is on a shelf in my living room - dry dock! Keeping you all in my prayers. Kris will always have Zach as a buddy, and will be able to teach his own children the value of real friendship through stories of Zach. Love and prayers.
Lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
England - Thursday, September 28, 2006 4:24 PM CDT

Nikki,
Today at high school all the kids are supposed to wear a color for what year they are in, like freshman, sophmore, etc. Freshman like Kristopher, are supposed to wear yellow.
Well, guess what shirt Kris wore....??? His Teen Wonder shirt! In a way he was able to take Zach to school with him today! I was so proud of him for wearing it!
Mary Ann Vaupel
Pekin, IL - Thursday, September 28, 2006 9:26 AM CDT

I'm so sorry you are still hurting so bad, they say time heals the broken heart, BUT i can't even imagine that ever happening, as my grandson was placed on hospice a few weeks ago,I think of the people who have already gone through this process and i just can't imagine that time will ever heal my heart, my heart is so broken right now, and i find it hard to even think of life without "BJ" in it,How do you even function? How do you go on with life without that very special person in it? My heart breaks for you and your entire family!
Bjs mamaw
KY - Tuesday, September 26, 2006 9:26 AM CDT

What a very special picture! It made my mind wander off to Zach's smile! My heart breaks when I read the journal Nik. I am speechless....Just know that I am still praying for you and we love you and your family very much! Take care sweetie,
Love Aunt Mary Ann
Mary ann <maryann61554@yahoo.com>
- Monday, September 25, 2006 7:24 PM CDT

zachary ohh how much i miss you!! its been real hard lately. ALOT of crying. it just seems harder as i spend more time with the whole family. and your still not there( at least physically) and sit and wonder what you would be doing in that moment when were together. like at uncle tims you would of been playing a game of pool with all of us. jay wanted me to go down there and play him a game but i just had a hard time and didnt do it. uncle tim did. and ive cut the all the familys hair alot of times and still not been able to cut yours. i miss it sooo much. you were so paticular of how u wanted me to do it!! you explained everything just the way u wanted it to look. so seeing that pic. of u and uncle tim getting your hair done helps me a little. that was a funny time. uncle tim freaking out saying it was burning and fussin like a little baby, and you giving him a hard time with it!! well i want ya to know your with me every single min. of my life here on earth until then i cant wait to so you buddy!!
aunt mandi <justus3deakins@sbcglobal.net>
- Monday, September 25, 2006 10:55 AM CDT

Nikki I always have you in my thoughts I know how hard it has been for you. I love the Picture of Zachary with you it is very sweet . I also will keep you and your family in my prayers God Bless You and Keep You in His Loving Arms and Comfort You with the Peace that only He can give.

hugs Daisy
Daisy Peralta <daisyperalta27@aol.com>
New York , NY USA - Monday, September 25, 2006 7:25 AM CDT

Nikki,
I have been thinking about you a lot, and about Zach. The precious picture you have on the homepage is exquisitely beautiful and captures the love between you and Zach. Sometimes I feel like he is watching over us. I don't know, he just is on my heart a lot. I know he would be one of the biggest cheerleaders for Jacob.

I miss and love you so much. I don't always know what to say, but I hope you know that you are never far from my heart and thoughts.

Jen
www.caringbridge.com/va/jacob_bollinger <kjenwhit@verizon.net>
- Sunday, September 24, 2006 9:41 PM CDT

Nikki,
Kristopher and I were driving to Walmart one night and he heard a song I was playing and he said it reminded him of a "Zach moment"... thats what he calls them now. Something will come to him and we will usually have a good laugh after he tells a story. This story was when he was over at your house "hanging out", playing games, talking girls, and whatever else they did, and Zach got up when he heard a song he liked and started doing his "sexy" dance. He told it so well and kind of did a mini-version of it for me. He had me laughing all the way to WalMart! I love when he brings up Zach. I know he thinks of Zach alot, and he gets quiet sometimes. Then he comes up with a good story that gets us laughing. We miss him - we miss him so much! Hugs to you all!
Mary Ann Vaupel <madk84@grics.net>
Pekin, IL - Friday, September 22, 2006 10:45 PM CDT

I read the story about your Dad yesterday but didn't have time to sign the guestbook. There were several times today that story popped into my head. I think it's amazing! What a great sign from God that Zachary is perfectly healed. Just wanted to tell you that.
Gina Barnes <ginabarnes@comcast.net>
Olney, MD - Friday, September 22, 2006 9:41 PM CDT

Zachary, I just wanted to be able to tell you how much we miss you and long to see that great smile. Even though you are with Jesus now I know you will get this message. My heart tells me that you are in the ultimate place, but my heart also breaks for your hugs. Don't be sad when we cry, it helps to get through each day. Just remember that I will never ever forget you and the love that we have. By the way, thanks for the "follow the yellow brick road" picture. I know that was a sign to me on my birthday that you love me too. Love you plus one!!!!!!! gramma
gramma <www.agrammaof7@grics.net>
- Thursday, September 21, 2006 1:12 PM CDT

Just stopped by to let you know we are thinking of you and praying that each day gets a little easier for you.Kates MomMom
www.caringbridge.org/visit/katelynwilliams
Wylie Williams <joewylie@comcast.net>
Villas, NJ USA - Wednesday, September 20, 2006 10:47 AM CDT

What an amazing and awe-inspiring story! Man, that made my whole day!! Thanks for sharing and may God wrap His loving arms of peace around you until you can see Zach again.
All my best
Lisa <loumicsmom@comcast.net>
Cedar Hill, TX USA - Tuesday, September 19, 2006 6:45 PM CDT

Hey Nikki, Kylee, and John,

Nikki, what beautiful picture. I know you are so grateful to have these memories. I have been keeping up with you, just not signing. Please forgive me. I hope you all have a "SON"filled week.

In HIS grip,
Phyllis
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, ms - Sunday, September 17, 2006 9:51 PM CDT

Dear Nikki,

I haven't checked up on Zach's site in a few weeks and it has been really bothering me. I love the photo you have presently on the homepage. Its just beautiful.

Oddly, I have a plant that symbolizes my daughter's life as well. I bought it healthy about a month before her birth. It has waxed and waned - did poorly just before diagnosis, slowly recovered, had some of its worst trouble since during transplant....Now, Janie is almost 8 months post-transplant, and her and the plant are doing fine. I wonder what the future holds.

Your dad's story is a gift to me as well. Maybe it makes me less afraid. I don't know.

Hope you are feeling as good as can be.

With love and prayers,

Colleen Kashino
Colleen M. Kashino
- Saturday, September 16, 2006 4:48 PM CDT

That is an awesome story Nikki! It is cool how God takes care of us. Love ya!
Jenny Otte <yippiehoo@seehearworks.com>
East Peoria, IL USA - Saturday, September 16, 2006 12:34 AM CDT

What a pracious picture of you and Zachary! And such a sweet story about the trees! Something your dad can cherish forever!!! He is so handsome! And you can just see the love of God in his eyes!!! I pray for you daily as you try to get acclimated to your life now. You are very special Nikki~ Your kids are so blessed to have you~ And John is too!!! Have a terrific weekend with your family! Love~ Kate
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Friday, September 15, 2006 10:50 PM CDT

Nikki, John, and Kylee---
Tonight we had a mini fundraiser for my dad's campaign. We had balloons at it and after the fundraiser was over Kim Creech, Jarrod Vaupel, Abi, and I wrote messages to Zach and Chad and let them go.
Gabi Dagit <Dramabelle92@yahoo.com>
Pekin, IL 61554 - Friday, September 15, 2006 10:12 PM CDT

Nikki,
Great picture of you and your Zachary on the home page.
I am sure you will treasure that picture for the rest of you life. I am sorry to hear you having a hard time. Take one second at a time if you need to & know that Angel Zachary is watching over all of his loved ones. Jan Karels
jan <jgkarels@cgintl.com>
- Friday, September 15, 2006 1:04 PM CDT

Dear Nikki
My heart breaks for you right now. I dont really know what to say. I dont know you at all but I pray that God will teach me to be a mom like you are. You are an awesome mom. I just pray that your heart will litened with an answer to your prays. You are in my prayers. God Bless You!!!
Andy, Melissa, Jayla & Jacob Rasmussen <amrasmussen@grics.net>
North Pekin, IL - Thursday, September 14, 2006 10:13 PM CDT

Thinking of you Nikki - I'm sure if our loved ones could comfort us every day in some way or another they would, maybe Heaven just isn't like that. Maybe God wants us to move on ...a lovely vicar said to me last week that as well as trusting Gods plan we - humans - must learn to entrust our loved ones to him after death and not concentrate too much, or question too closely on the details of exactly what happens - that is for God to know. Like you I am struggling right now. The days seem pointless and life is too hard. Everyone assures me this will get better...I hope it does for everyone who has had a loss. Thinking of you Nikki and keeping you in my prayers.
Lisa Burt <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
UK - Thursday, September 14, 2006 5:50 AM CDT

Nikki~ I don't have many words today... But I need you to kow that you are covered in prayer every day here in my house! I think of you often and I cannot imagine what you are going through but I do kow that Jesus can get you through it! And that is my prayer every day- That you and Kylee and John can just get through one day at a time... And even though Zach is gone- think of the FUN he is having pain free and think of that glorious day when we will all be with him in eternity!!! You were truly blessed to be called his mom and I will continue to pray for comfort and peace for you and your family! Love and prayers from Coatesville, Pa~ Kate HEbb
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Wednesday, September 13, 2006 6:42 AM CDT

I am so glad we saw you and Kylee at our party on Sunday. I know you are going through tough times and it means alot to me that you came. I think of you often Nik. You can call me any time. I know you miss Zach so much. On another note...I want you to know that the FIRST present Leeah wanted was "that Dora radio thing". She was playing it last night and all the way to school this a.m. You did good with that one..Thank You again.
Gina
Groveland, IL - Monday, September 11, 2006 9:05 AM CDT

hey sis. man i miss him sooo much!! i told don last night it doesnt even seem that long since i was able to see zach. hopefully it stays that way till the time i get to see him again. it must semm a long time for you. and im sorry for that. the time will come when we get to see him for the rest of our lives. i had another dream of zach ill have to tell ya about it. i stopped out at zachs site and i left him some starburst. his favorite candy. it mad me think of him so i left him some. its of the new flavor. i didnt know if he tried them yet. nikki i dont know if these words will help for when your missing him big time, but i think to myself would i rather have him here watching him fight to stay alive and even take a braeth and be selfish or live his wonderful life he deserves with our awsome god!! doing all the things he deserves!! ill get to see him again for the rest of my life watching him live his life that way so ill give my time now on earth with out my zachary and wait my turn to see him in heaven living our awsome eternal life together!!i love ya guys
aunt mandi <justus3deakins@sbcglobal.net>
- Monday, September 11, 2006 8:42 AM CDT

Hi Nikki

Today - at last - a month after losing Ronnie I'm trying to put our bedroom back in order...its turned into a meltdown day, just buckets of tears, and I wondered how you were faring. I know our loss is different - I've lost an old frog, you've lost a great young tadpole :) - but loss is loss and loss infiltrates every cell of my body, and I'm sure its the same for you. Hoping and praying you're having a 'good' day. Hmm, not sure my analogy is complimentary...Ronnie's eyebrows would probably have gone down at being called an old frog - Hope Zach doesn't mind being a tadpole. Love and prayers.
Lisa Burt <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
England - Saturday, September 2, 2006 1:09 PM CDT

HI Nikki

Keeping your in my prayers Nikki. I'm forever being told that 'time is a great healer'at the moment...some days it just doesn't feel like that at all. Keeping you in my thoughts.
Lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
England - Friday, September 1, 2006 2:43 PM CDT

Nikki,
I've signed the guestbook a few times. I found Zack's site throigh Lunch for Life. I've read Zach's site almost everyday since early Dec and I feel comfortable saying you did absolutely everything a mother could do to save their son. You should feel very proud of the job you did with Zach. You went above and beyond. I just want you to know that, even from a stranger, we can tell how much you did. I cannot imagine how you feel. You watch those videos as much as you have to. I think I'd have to do the same thing.
Sincerely,
Gina Barnes
Gina BArnes <ginabarnes@comcast.net>
Olney, MD - Thursday, August 31, 2006 9:49 PM CDT

Nikki,
My heart is breaking as I read your journal entry from Tuesday 8/29. I have written several time in the past but I am not sure if I have shared with you that we lost my oldest brother to a tragic auto accident this winter. Our situation is not the same but I can relate to the loss of a loved one as I watch my Mom try to cope with losing her "baby" even though he was 48, it is hard to watch the sadness in her eyes & emptiness she feels. The reason I tell you all of this is because my Mom gave each of us siblings & my sister-in-law a wonderful book on dealing with grief it is Christian based and I know from reading this journal that you do have a Christian Faith. It is written by a mother who not only lost two infant sons she lost a third son (age 17)to a auto accident caused by a drunk driver. I am only part way thru the book but I wish I had this book 5 months ago. The name of the book is "Roses in December" by Marilyn Hevenlin. I have cried while reading it & I have ached for her family but I have also found comfort in trying to cope with our loss and in the fact that we are not alone just as you & your family are not alone.
By the way think you were an awesome MOM to your son & you did EVERYTHING possible for Zach!!! Remember God is in control & everything you did for Zach was directed by Him.
You, John & Kylee continue to be in my thoughts & prayers.
Jan Karels (friends of Mike & Robin Ford)

Jan Karels <jgkarels@cgintl.com>
- Thursday, August 31, 2006 12:42 AM CDT

Nikki,
Parents are always plagued with questions after making life and death decisions for a child. Look at Zachary's life, his joy, his happiness, the love that flowed so freely and was shared with so many. He was dealt a HORRIBLE hand--stage iv nb--yet with you at his side he lived, really LIVED, a full, rich life! You did EVERYTHING right!
Much love,
Jennifer Click and Carolyn & Evan Coveney <jclick@mindspring.com>
Falls Church, VA - Wednesday, August 30, 2006 10:32 PM CDT

Keeping you in my thougths and in my prayer's always.

Love Brenda MY LOVING DAD'S SITE <brurka@shaw.ca>
Edmonton,Alberta

, - Wednesday, August 30, 2006 10:02 PM CDT

Hey there-
I have signed a couple times...I wish I had words to help you realize there is meaning in all of this. I firmly believe that. When my best friend died of Hodgkins Dec 23rd, 1997 I thought my life could never be the same. The honest truth, it hasn't been the same, but with time I have come to say THAT IS OK. Of course I still miss him, he was my godfather, uncle and best friend-but his life had so much more meaning to me later on in my life. Those memories of him sick and me at age 15 feeding him dinner because he was too weak-haunt me every now and then. But now I realize, this is what he wanted-to be pain free. That is what I cling to every day-he is no longer struggling to make it another day-he is perfect in every sense of the word. (I hope this helps in some way)
Sara <Urawesome6939@yahoo.com>
Madison, WI - Wednesday, August 30, 2006 12:20 AM CDT

Dear Nikki -

I have not signed in awhile but have been keeping up with Zach's page. I can't imagine what you must be going through but want you to know that my heart goes out to you. I am hoping for better days mostly filled with happy memories of your boy.

With love and prayers,

Colleen Kashino

Colleen M. Kashinoc
- Monday, August 28, 2006 7:36 AM CDT

Thank you for the "Normal Is..." poem. I am a recurrent Neuroblastoma patient who just came home from a I-131 MIBG treatment/bone marrow transplant hospital stay and I have to go in this week for my scans and tests to see if it worked. And while I'm about to be hooked up for my nightly hydration and I see a box of medications in one corner of my room and a red Sharps box in the other, and while my bald head feels a little chilled, I find comfort in the poem...in knowing that I'm not alone. Thank you. My prayers are with you and your family.
God bless.
Heather
CSU Monterey Bay, CA USA - Monday, August 28, 2006 1:42 AM CDT

Nikki~ Thanks so much for sharing your feelings! I wish so badly that I could have had the opportunity to meet Zach-and you and your family as well! But I am blessed for the opportunity to pray for all of you each day. I know that God has something special in store for you! He wouldn't have brought you this far to let you fall- He is so loving and caring and I know that one day you will be able to see His plan unfold right before your eyes! I pray that it will be soon too!!! Til then- I will pray for God's peace to be upon you all and that you will gain new strength to make it through each new day! Love and prayers~ Kate
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Wednesday, August 23, 2006 11:31 PM CDT

Nikki,
Hi! I am praying for you. You have such a big heart and you love to help people. It is a gift that you have. You love to bring joy to others. I pray God will show you His will. He has great plans for you. There is hope.
Jenny Otte <yippiehoo@seehearworks.com>
East Peoria, IL USA - Wednesday, August 23, 2006 9:07 PM CDT

Nikki~ I still come by and check on you every day! And pray for you, John, and Kylee... I hope you feel the love of God in all you do today! You are very special even to those who don't know you personally. Take care~ Kate
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Tuesday, August 22, 2006 10:21 PM CDT

Nikki, John and Princess Kylee,
We are still here, keeping you all in our thoughts, and praying you are getting through each day with the support of each other and love and support from your family and friends!
Mary Ann, Dave, Kris & Jarrod Vaupel <madk84@grics.net>
Pekin, IL - Monday, August 21, 2006 10:22 PM CDT

Hi Nikki, just wanted you to know we are alwaying thinking of you guys. Even though we have never met, Chassity and I still tell people about Zach and the stories you have told thru the journals. When you wrote about you're daily lives you let everyone that read this journal in your life. You made it so easy to love someone we never met. Thanks for being you!
Carrie (Chassity's mom) www.caringbridge.org/va/chassity <flintcx4@yahoo.com>
The Plains, Va 20198 - Sunday, August 20, 2006 12:57 AM CDT

Nikki~ You were on my mind alot today- So I prayed for you! I hope you can feel the love~:) I wish so much that I could have met Zachary- all the stories about him touch my heart so! I know there will come a day when I'll get to see him- making others smile! It will be so nice! Well- My eyes are burning- time for bed- you take care and try yo have sweet dreams! Love In Him~ Kate Hebb
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Wednesday, August 16, 2006 10:08 PM CDT

Nikki,
I think of Zach and all of you every day, several times! You mentioned Mountain Mudd and that reminded me of the day we took Zach with us shopping. I am the only one of us four that likes coffee, and when Zach mentioned he wanted something at Gloria Jean's coffee, I was thrilled to have someone with me that appreciated the stuff, too! So we made our way there and he got his favorite latte and I got a mocha thing. He decided to try it, and I could tell he was being polite, saying, "its good", but he smiled when I said, "but yours is better, right?" and he nodded a big yes. What a cutie he was. Just melts my heart thinking about it right now. Another one of my favorite little memories was watching them studying the gaming magazine Zach would bring out when we were there with Kris. By the seriousness of their discussions, you would think they were studying for a test. What game would be their next purchase? I loved how they worked together to get through a game's level. Isn't it peculiar (and wonderful) how all the little things stick with us?

Kristopher started high school today, and Zach is on his mind. Where would his locker have been? Close to his? What classes would they have been in together? These thoughts make it harder to go it alone today. Keeping you, John and sweet Kylee in our prayers!

I hope you got the emails with all the pictures I took at the St. Jude run!
Mary Ann Vaupel
Pekin, IL - Wednesday, August 16, 2006 11:47 AM CDT

hey nikki,john&kylee! i would like to share this special memory i will always have of zach..it was this past may at his graduation, when i came to pick up kayla i didn't want to bring the boys in with me(they can be pretty rowdy!!)and i wasn't sure how zach was feeling~ but after i had come into the house, zach says where are the boys? could you bring them in so i can see them. my heart just melted! that was zach, always thinking of others!! nikki, we love you all & i want you to know how much zach meant to all of us!! he IS watching over you & i pray that your wonderful zach memories & precious dreams will comfort your heart & help you to "keep going". love~kim,kayla,nick&mason
kim meints
pekin, il usa - Wednesday, August 16, 2006 7:49 AM CDT

if ur reading this please leave my sis some encouraging words!! shes really needing some right now. and alot of praying for some comforting peace, and some awsome, sweet, and amazing zach dreams( for the whole family):)thank yoo
_even some or any little zach moment we just love reading those_PLEAS PLEASE PLEASE!!
aunt mandi <justus3deakins@sbcglobal.net>
- Wednesday, August 16, 2006 2:01 AM CDT

hi ya guys!!! hope things are better now that ur home safe!!LOL so ya think ya going to go with john again on a buisness trip??!! ya need anything just give me a jingle.im off on wed. and dont go in till 4 on thur. but anytime is ok. i think about u guys alot!!and im just soo blessed to have u as my big sis!! i love ya girl!! muah to all of ya!!
aunt mandi <justus3deakins@sbcglobal.net>
- Tuesday, August 15, 2006 1:04 AM CDT

nikki i didnt realize u were having a hard time. i wished i could of stayed the whole time u were there. i love ya sis!! ur an amazing person!!(and sis, and mother) im missin him soo much. when i get feelin like this my heart aches soo much for u. and i start feeling sick to my stomach. its just soo crazy is the only words i have for the feeling of not being able to see him for this long. i dont know if theres anything to say to make ya smile, but ya know i always try when i see ya. i love seeing ya smile and if ya ever need to smile just let me know. u know my im a crazy girl sometimes, and ill do just about anything to do that for ya!!LOL yet it could be scary!!LOL ok ill shut up sis!! well love ya all, and give ky-ky a big kiss from usand tell john we love him too!loves ya all!!
aunt mandi <justus3deakins@sbcglobal.net>
- Wednesday, August 9, 2006 0:37 AM CDT

Nikki~ You are so strong and I admire your faith as well! I have written this before but I just want you to know that I cannot imagine going through the emotions that you do- every day! I continue to pray for you all every day- that each day will get a little easier. I know that with God to lean on- it has to help! We love you and will continue to pray!~ Kate Hebb and family
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Monday, August 7, 2006 6:32 AM CDT

Hi Nikki, John, and Kylee
I am so glad you liked the Zach shirts that I had made. Next year I am going to do the run for Zach and I am going to ask Kris if he wants to do it to. I am going to to a bake sale at my church and my grandma's. All the $ will go to St.Jude. We always keep u in our prayers. Love you guys a lot. If you need anything just let us know.
Kayla Meints <meints5@msn.com>
Pekin, Il U.S.A. - Sunday, August 6, 2006 9:42 PM CDT

nikki and family---
i am so sorry i couldn't make it friday.
ml---gabi dagit
gabi dagit <dramabelle92@yahoo.com>
pekin, il usa - Sunday, August 6, 2006 9:31 AM CDT

Happy Belated birthday Zach. Sorry I couldn't be there last night but I haven't been feeling well. Just know ALL of you are in my thoughts and prayers daily. Give each other big hugs from us and keep your heads up. Talk to you soon.
Love, Marilyn Mommy to Our LiL Superhero Forever Aaron <stjudemomma74@aol.com or www.caringbridge.org/il/aarondhunter>
Peoria, IL USA - Wednesday, August 2, 2006 3:29 PM CDT

Happy Birthday Buddy!! I think about you every day..I don't think the memories you and I had together will ever leave me...The little things are what I remember the best...how you could make me laugh by just looking at me...I loved that..I remember one day at lunch at school you were sitting across from me at the table and all you did was look at me...I laughed so hard that my milk shot out my nose..you had a knack for making faces bud!
Love you and miss you
Kris Vaupel <whitetail518@yahoo.com>
Pekin, IL United States - Tuesday, August 1, 2006 11:28 PM CDT

happy birthday zach!! you are in our thoughts today!! what a party you must be havin' in heaven!! even though kayla could not be with you guys tonite, you were all on our minds. the zach shirts kayla had made turned out awesome!! we are planning on being at county market to cheer on tim & amber saturday!! we love you guys!! kim kayla nick & mason
kim meints
pekin, il usa - Tuesday, August 1, 2006 10:54 PM CDT

Happy Birthday Zach we all love you so very much.

Nikki i've been thinking of you today,i know it's been a tough day but i hope good memories of birthdays past have given you some comfort.
With love always,
Theresa
Executive Director
Cancer Warriors Angel Network
Theresa Heath <theresa@cancerwarriors.org>
Rowlett, Tx - Tuesday, August 1, 2006 10:21 PM CDT

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ZACH ! ! ! ! !

Nikki,John, & Kylee,

I hope you had a special day remembering Zach. I hope you could feel the prayers we offered up for you.

Love in CHRIST,
Phyllis
phyllis sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
southaven, ms - Tuesday, August 1, 2006 10:05 PM CDT

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ZACH!!!!!!
Dale, Janet, Aaron, and Brandon
PEKIN , IL - Tuesday, August 1, 2006 1:21 PM CDT

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ZACH! we all miss you/love you so much!
jenny miller <jennymiller92@hotmail.com>
manito, il us - Tuesday, August 1, 2006 1:03 PM CDT

Happy birthday Teen Wonder!!

Always thinking of you and missing you!

"Love ya",
Hollie
Hollie <amydav86@insightbb.com>
North Pekin, IL - Tuesday, August 1, 2006 10:37 AM CDT

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ZACHARY!!!!!
I can't even imagine the party going on up there today! I hope you get a chance to tell your Mom all about it tonight in her dreams.
Love and hugs,
Jennifer Click and Carolyn & Evan Coveney <jclick@mindspring.com>
Falls Church, VA - Tuesday, August 1, 2006 9:33 AM CDT

Nikki,
My dad always told me this wonderful story when I was little. I have passed it along to my kids. He said that when God was trying to decide what child to give to parents, he walked into this great big room, where all the future children are, just waiting to be born after God decided. He walked and watched, and listened to each child's inner voice. He looked over and saw a glow, that told him this was the child to give these parents. When I was small I loved the thought of God walking through a room of laughing babies, searching for just the right child to give a mother. Then just knowing who was a perfect match.
God picked Zachary for you because he knew he was special just for you, just as he picked Kylee!

We are thinking of Zachary today, and will see you tonight!
Hugs,
Mary Ann Vaupel <madk84@grics.net>
- Tuesday, August 1, 2006 9:02 AM CDT

Happy Birthday Zach!
Nikki, Celebrate like youv'e never celebrated before. Zach will be right by your side tonight enjoying the whole celebration. Have a great time!! Thinking of you and love you lots!
Robin Ford
Mankato, MN USA - Tuesday, August 1, 2006 7:14 AM CDT

Hello Nikki, Just want you to know I'm thinking of you. Tomorrow is going to be tough. Everytime I hold my baby boy I think of the pain you must be going through. I know you're missing him so much. I wish things could have turned out differently. I'll see you tomorrow night at 6:00. Love You...
Gina <gbooth@insightbb.com>
- Monday, July 31, 2006 9:13 PM CDT

Nikki, I am sorry it's been so long since I signed the guestbook. We were having technical difficulties with our modem and phone line. I think of you and Zach so very often.

We will be wishing Zach a happy birthday tomorrow. While we can't be there with you in person, we will be there in spirit.

I'm going to send you an email with more. Just know I love you and my heart aches for you.

Much love,
Jen
www.caringbridge.com/va/jacob_bollinger <kjenwhit@verizon.net>
Staunton, VA - Monday, July 31, 2006 11:01 AM CDT

Nikki, Friday my daughter, Casey, and I were at an outdoor theater (the Muni) in Springfield. They were celebrating their 1 millionth patron so they handed us each a balloon to be launched right before the show started. While I was holding my blue balloon I thought of Zach and it being his birthday real soon. So I wrote his name on it and when the time came I let it go and whispered Happy Birthday, Zach. It was an amazing site watching hundreds of balloons rising into the sky towards heaven.
Brenda McCarthy <rbmccarthy@casscomm.com>
Virginia, IL - Monday, July 31, 2006 8:45 AM CDT

Nikki, John, and Kylee,

I just wanted to let you know that I am praying for GOD's grace and strength for you this week. I hope ya'll have a wonderful celebration of Zach's life on Tuesday. You will be in my thoughts and prayers. I wish I could be there to share it with you.

Love in CHRIST,
Phyllis
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Sunday, July 30, 2006 10:14 PM CDT

Hi Nikki~ I still check in on you and PRAY!!! It must be so hard coming up on Zachary's birthday. I want you to know that you have a special place in my heart and I will pray for you every day! My family as well! You all take care and hold on to eachother during this time! Love~ kate
Kate hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Friday, July 28, 2006 5:56 PM CDT

Hi Nikki, John, and Kyle. Ale and me are always thinking of you guys in our prayers. I am ordering shirts with a picture of Zach on them for all my firends. We love you guys a lot. We will talk to you later bye.
Kayla and Ale <ajones@ntslink.net>
Pekin, Il U.S.A. - Thursday, July 27, 2006 3:55 PM CDT

Nikki, I'm sorry that people feel they have the right to cause you, Kylee and John more pain when you are already in such pain from the physical loss of Zachary. I kind of understand because my family is like that--if they can't fix a person's pain, they start to blame the person for being in pain and things get ugly. I hope the people hurting you see themselves in your post and realize the wrong they are doing. You are a FANTASTIC mother to both of your kids. Zachary was dealt a tough hand in life, yet he lived a richer, fuller life than most people could in 100 years, because he had the most perfect Mom and family.
Sending love and hugs,
Jennifer Click and Carolyn & Evan Coveney <jclick@mindspring.com>
Falls Church, VA - Wednesday, July 26, 2006 8:36 AM CDT

Nikki & John,
We really enjoyed getting to spend a few moments with you all the other evening. I can't help remembering the awesome birthday party for Zach at the movie theater last year. I took alot of pictures, and one that I took looks exactly like the one you have on this website when he stuck his face in the cake! Zach made sure everyone was enjoying themselves that day. Kristopher mentions Zach everyday. It might be little things he says- like today on the radio, he heard a song (country, of course, and I can't remember who) but he said, "Zach got me this CD". Or he would be watching a TV show and say "Zach loved this show". Zach is in his heart forever, and won't be forgotten.

Zach was so smart! I think he made sure the relationship he had with you was so close, so that when he had to leave, you could draw upon those awesome memories and love he left in your heart for added strength. We are planning on being there for Zach's birthday!
Hugs to you all!

Mary Ann Vaupel
Pekin, IL - Tuesday, July 25, 2006 3:36 PM CDT

Hey Nikki,
just wanted to send you BIG hugs and let you know i come check everyday for your updates and continue to hold you in prayer,may God offer your heart some comfort right now.
Love,
Theresa
Executive Director
Cancer Warriors Angel Network
Theresa Heath <theresa@cancerwarriors.org>
Rowlett, Tx - Tuesday, July 25, 2006 7:26 AM CDT

P.S. to kylee~~~you truly are a princess!!
kim meints
- Tuesday, July 25, 2006 0:55 AM CDT

hi nikki, john & kylee, i check the site OFTEN, but i thought i had better write to you,too! i was SO EXCITED to read that tim & amber are doing the Run!! you guys GO GO GO!!! it is such an awesome experience being a part of the run~God bless!! i think about all of you & zach alot. i am sad when i read how much you are missing him, he was such an amazing boy! our thoughts will be with all of you next week on his birthday. is kylee ready to start school? i wanted you to know that my sister in alaska keeps up with zach's site,too! tim knows my brother-in-law, matt hurd. he just received his orders to go to iraq. again, i apologize for losing touch for awhile, but we love all of you lots!!!~kim & the kids
kim meints
- Tuesday, July 25, 2006 0:53 AM CDT

Nikki~ I am so sorry that you're having such a rough time!!! It is totally expected but my heart just breaks for you! I know we've never met but I do know that God had our "paths" cross for a reason and I want to remind you that I am praying every day for all of you as you go through this time in your lives! I will say an extra prayer for you on the 1st as you celebrate Zachary's life! What a special boy- the apple doesn't fall far from the tree as I can see from your love for him in your journal entries! You take care and know that I am here praying for you!!! In HIM~ Kate
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Monday, July 24, 2006 9:35 PM CDT

Nikki, I think of you guys all the time. I can't imagine the pain you must be feeling. We took Brandon to Disney this summer and I thought of Zach alot. I know it was one of his favorite places. Everywhere we went I would wonder if Zach had been in that exact spot, and I would say a little prayer for you guys. Lots of love to your whole family.
Janet
Pekin , IL - Monday, July 24, 2006 7:47 PM CDT

Nikki,
You are still in my prayers my friend. Hope to see you soon.
Jenny Otte <yippiehoo@seehearworks.com>
East Peoria, IL - Monday, July 24, 2006 7:06 PM CDT

Nikki, I have followed your site for some time now. Anyone who reads your posts can feel the love you have for your son. He must have been an amazing boy, and you are an amazing mother. Anyone who would cause you anymore pain at this time in your life is not worth the energy. Take what you have left and put it into that beautiful daughter and wonderful husband. One can only pray the pain will lessen and memories stay as clear as they are today. I hope Zachary will come to you in your dreams tonight and lay down beside you.
Holli Goss <3goss@insightbb.com>
Pekin, il - Monday, July 24, 2006 5:53 PM CDT

Hey Nikki, I really enjoyed your last entry. It did make me smile. Hold on to all those wonderful memories. Love you. Tammy
Tammy Schoenfeldt <gtschoenfeldt@aol.com >
Warner Robins, GA - Thursday, July 20, 2006 8:41 PM CDT

nikki i enjoyed that alot!! weve been talkn about getting zachs shirt for the run!! u should here moms idea. i dont know though u might like it too. but i think zachs superman symbol is a neat idea!! man don probally feels special!!he took a long time drawing that up. hes such a great guy!! almost as good as zach!!LOL well im glad u found a few things around the house to put a smile on your face!! i luv ya
aunt mandi <justus3deakins@sbcglobal.net>
- Wednesday, July 19, 2006 4:31 PM CDT

Nikki~ I haven't written in a while but I do check your site every day and pray for you each time I do so! I cannot imagine how you are coping with this! Just know that I am praying for all of you as you adjust to this each in your own way. Love~ kate hebb
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Monday, July 17, 2006 6:30 PM CDT

i agree sis we need to get together and do that!! its going to be hard!! real hard but a great time to talk about all our memories!! what awsome ones we all have!!! i cant wait!! i love u sis! sweet zachary dreams!! love ya all
aunt mandi <justus3deakins@sbcglobal.net>
- Monday, July 17, 2006 0:49 AM CDT

Nikki,
Those new pictures sure gave me a lump in my throat!

This thing you are going through now will be okay. If you need our help, we will be there in a second! We know Zach wanted you taken care of, and I'm sure that his kind, gentle heart never would have imagined a turn like this. But he is up there with the Boss and will make sure things are handled! We check on all of you here everyday, and as always, are praying that God gives you his comfort!
Mary Ann Vaupel
Pekin, IL - Tuesday, July 11, 2006 12:44 AM CDT

nikki i believe zach gave me a sign in my sleep last night! he told me everthing is ok! and he is doing great. and then a bright light came and he was gone. i cried sooo much my eyes were crusted when i woke up. it was an awsome feeling though and yet it kinda spooked me!!LOL i also had a hard time going back to sleep because i felt like he was just standing there in my room, in a way it was nice knowing he was that close to me but yet scary!! i dont know why but it just scares me!! well i hope things are going ok!! just pray real hard harder then ever!! and everybody else lot of things going on that needs to be handled in gods hands and the right thing will happen. just believe!! well i love ya guys if ya need me im here!! ALWAYS!!!!
aunt mandi <justus3deakins@sbcglobal.net>
- Sunday, July 9, 2006 10:08 PM CDT

Dear Nikki, Just want to let you know I really enjoy the stories you have been sharing about Zach.I think of him often and all of you. I both laugh and cry at them. Keeping you all in my prayers. Love in Christ, Jacob's Neenie- Kathy
Kathy Mellon <gaston501@juno.com>
McCoole, MD USA - Sunday, July 9, 2006 7:02 AM CDT

NIKKI,JOHN,& PRINCESS KYLEE,

Guys please know I am ALWAYS here for ALL of you. Nikki my heart is aching sooooo much for you and your family. I know too that Zach is watching down saying Mom KEEP YOUR HEAD UP!!!! Just remember GOD has EVERYTHING under control and he knows everything that is gonna happen before we could even thing about it. Call me when you get home. I want to come see you guys. Hey John I know you already give Nikki GREAT hugs but please give her a great big one from me and Nikki give Kylee a HUGE hug from me/Antavious. LOL:) Talk to you guys soon
Marilyn Mommy to Our LiL Superhero Forever Aaron <www.caringbridge.org/il/aarondhunter or stjudemomma74@aol.com>
Peoria, IL USA - Saturday, July 8, 2006 11:17 PM CDT

Nikki, Just a quick note to remind you that "everythings going to be ok". It doesn't seem like it right now but God is in control. You are blessed with an adorable daughter and wonderful husband. O yea don't forget us super de duper parents that love you o so much!!!!!!!!! Concentrate on making wonderful lasting memories with all of us. Zach will always be with us no matter what we are doing. He is truly one amazing grandson and I won't let the devil steal my memories or the feelings I have for him, but Zach wants you to smile and dwell on all the good times. You can do it for him. Just remember you have one big loving family that will always be there for you every step of the way. So stay strong, hold your head up, and cry when you need to. Its ok to cry. But always remember how much we all love you. We need you too. Love you plus one!!!! MOM
MOM <www.agrammaof7@grics.net>
- Saturday, July 8, 2006 9:31 AM CDT

Hey guys,
You have really been on my heart today. I hope everything is going great. I hope the "SON" shines brightly on you today.
Love in CHRIST,
Phyllis
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Friday, July 7, 2006 4:14 PM CDT

Nikki, Kylee, & John,

I apologize for the delay in writing. We have been on vacation.
Nikki, thank you so much for sharing your Zach stories. They make me smile all the time. GOD is so good to give you these wonderful memories. I know they are not Zach, but they too are something special.
I hope you have a great weekend.

Love in CHRIST,
Phyllis
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Thursday, July 6, 2006 7:39 PM CDT

Dear Nikki---
I just got back from MN a few days ago, so I hadn't been able to read the page for the last week or so. I started crying when my mom called me while I was up there to tell me what you had wrote about Zach and I. That's one memory of Zach I will always have. You were such a wonderful mother to him and Kylee is such a beautiful little girl. Nikki, I know there's probably not a lot I can do to help comfort you, but I do want you to know that I am always here for you and your family, what ever it mya be that you need. Thank you for always being so good to me.

Love Always,
Gabi Dagit
Gabi Dagit <Dramabelle92@yahoo.com>
Pekin, IL - Monday, July 3, 2006 2:09 PM CDT

Man, I used to freak out just drinking after someone out of the same water bottle! Now, I have a whole new reason to make sure the bottle is sealed! :D Nikki, thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings and your wonderful stories of Zach. And thanks to all the other visitors to the site for sharing things about Zach. I can just see the look on his face after spraying his friend's back with water to freak him out!!! Zach had such a great grin when he was up to something!

Thanks also for reminding me to be grateful for every little thing, even fighting siblings. I just realized this past week how wonderful it is that Angel treats Jacob like any older sister treats her little brother. :) Normal. It's a gift that is too easy to take for granted.

I miss Zach so much. It's still so hard to believe he's gone. I admire your going back to work and living your life to honor Zach. I think of you ALL and keep you in my prayers.

We miss you and love you.
Jen Jacob Keith Angel
www.caringbridge.com/va/jacob_bollinger <kjenwhit@verizon.net>
Staunton, VA - Saturday, July 1, 2006 10:50 PM CDT

I think the thing that I miss right now most of all about Zach, is how he could make you in such a good mood after you had the worst day; and his laugh. I loved his laugh!!
If you ever need anything---I'm here for you guys,
Hollie

Hollie LandiVittori <amydav86@insightbb.com>
North Pekin, IL - Saturday, July 1, 2006 11:21 AM CDT

Love hearing the Zach stories. Keep em coming.
Rosie
Windham, ME - Wednesday, June 28, 2006 1:56 PM CDT

Nikki,
hey sweetie,i'm sending you a big hug,i know you need it right now,remember you can write me anytime.
It doesn't surprise me at all that despite the pain it caused him Zach still made sure to give you kisses and let you know he loved you,he was just an amazing young man and i miss him very much.
We lost another little warrior today,just 5 years old,also to NB .. it just breaks my heart but i know Zach was there waiting for him and telling him everything was ok.
Remembering your remarkable son,
Theresa
Executive Director
Cancer Warriors Angel Network
www.cancerwarriors.org
Theresa Heath <theresa@cancerwarriors.org>
Rowlett, Tx - Tuesday, June 27, 2006 10:22 PM CDT

Nikki~ I just reread my last guestbook entry and I spelled your name-Mikki! Sorry for the typo!!! Anyway- even if you don't write a funny, it is nice to hear you speak of Zachary in any way- your love for him is so tender and the way you speak of him sends shivers through my spine!!! He is so blessed to have you as his mom and you to have him as your son! What a wonderful bond!!! A true gift from God!! Only He could have picked such a perfect pair! I pray for you every day that you'll have a happy day and that your mind will be filled with lots of fun memories of Zach as well as new fun times with John and Kylee!!! You are such a wonderful family and I wish only the best for all of you! take care and feel the warmth of God's love over you today and in all the days to come!~ Kate Hebb
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Monday, June 26, 2006 10:21 PM CDT

I have a Zach story~It was in 7th grade and Zach was gonna bring snickerdoodles to the class that next day, i heard him talking about it and asked him what a snickerdoodle was and he was in shock that i didnt kno what they were and had never tasted one before, so when he brought them the next day he showed me what they were. I'll always miss talking to Zach about Fear Factor, and will never forget him!
Jenny MIller <DragonsBabe2006@yahoo.com>
Manito, IL. U.S. - Monday, June 26, 2006 8:03 AM CDT

Nikki,

I just have to thank you for sharing your stories of Zachary. I feel like I know you and him now. (I've signed a few times. I found your site through lunch for life in Dec.) I'm convinced Zachary is the headliner at the comedy show in Heaven! That boy said and did the funniest things! Keep sharing. God Bless you, Kylee, your husband and your friends and family.

Sincerely,
Gina
Gina Barnes <ginabarnes@comcast.net>
Olney, MD - Friday, June 23, 2006 4:54 PM CDT

Nikki,

now that was funny,never one to miss a chance to make you laugh was he.
I miss him and so i can't imagine how it is for you ... my thoughts are with you all everday.
Love Theresa
Executive Director Cancer Warrior Angel Network <theresa@cancerwarriors.org>
www.cancerwarriors.org, Tx - Friday, June 23, 2006 7:40 AM CDT

Gosh~ I wish I could have met that boy!!! He seems so sweet and hilarious!!! He'd have fit in great aroung here- it's non-stop teasing and laughing!!! Well- thanks for continuing to update Mikki! It is really neat to hear who Zachary was- to laugh and cry with you when reading each little story! You are very special! Take care-give Kylee a hug for us!=) ~Kate Hebb
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Friday, June 23, 2006 6:42 AM CDT

Nikki, Kylee, & John,
Oh my goodness gracious. The neighborhood is just not the same without zach. It's really hard going up to your house & not saying "Can Zach & Kylee come outside?" It's just so hard to imagine that zach is really gone. I mean i don't think it's kicked in yet. I remember this one time, me&zach were dating like a long time ago & he wuz going to florida. So i came over to say goodbye & we went in the play house & he picked me up & gave be thee biggest hug that i've ever experienced! I miss him so much.
Kylee has been talking to me about hows she's feeling about the loss of her dear brother. She says that she feel alone, & not very safe. Poor girl.Zach used to take such good care of her. He wuz most def. my hero & that'll never change. Remember, I can watch kylee whenever you & john wanna go out or something. I'm always free. She can come over whenever i don't mind.

LOVE!
McKenzie <prpldolphin@insightbb.com>
Pekin, IL usa - Thursday, June 22, 2006 2:36 PM CDT

Thanks for the Avian water story! I read it before I went to Gabi's last night and I couldn't stop laughing. I wasn't having too good of time before the story but it made me feel better once I read it. I miss Zach so much and I can't even think how it is for you, but memories of him just make smiles, tears of happiness, and help to always keep him with us.

Thanks and ALWAYS here for you guys,
Hollie

Hollie LandiVittori <amydav86@insightbb.com>
North Pekin, IL - Thursday, June 22, 2006 2:17 PM CDT

Hey Nikki! It's mom just stopping in to say hello. Now that you are working I can't just stop and call you to see how you are. That's going to be an adjustment for me, but if a job helps you I'm all for it. When you have spare time you better call me!!!!! Thanks for asking for all the stories, it makes my day, smiles and tears. You are an awesome daughter and I love you so much!!!!! MOM
mom <www.agrammaof7@grics.net>
- Thursday, June 22, 2006 1:52 PM CDT

Hey Nikki and Family---
Hollie and I would like to share one of those Zach stories that puts a smile on your face. When Zach and Kris got to the airport from California (Kris and Hollie were dating as were Zach and I) the boys called us from the airport. We ended up inviting them over to my house. Hollie and I went up stairs to shower and get dressed, because we had been swimming in the lake. While we were up stairs we blared the song "My Boyfriend's Back" over and over til they got to my house. It may not be the funniest story, but it's one of those stories that brings back so many memories.

Much Love---
Hollie and Gabi
Hollie-n-Gabi <Dramabelle92@yahoo.com>
Pekin, IL U.S.A. - Wednesday, June 21, 2006 8:48 PM CDT

That is funny Nikki! (water) I am so glad you got that job! Praise God! I will be praying. Love ya!
Jenny Otte <yippiehoo@seehearworks.com>
East Peoria, IL USA - Wednesday, June 21, 2006 6:44 PM CDT

Hahahaha! What a hoot!!! I'll never drink out of a bottle of water that doesn't have it's seal again!!! Too funny! I am still checking in and praying every day for you Nikki! I am committed to doing so for the long haul!!! God and I had a little talk and He told me that this is part of my ministry! It is so nice to pray for people that you don't know directly but that He puts in your path to help with nothing in it for me but answered prayers on your end! So- take hold of the reassurance that there is someone in Coatesville, Pa that has your back! Love in Him~ kate hebb
Kate hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Wednesday, June 21, 2006 1:07 PM CDT

I have been checking in on you and Zach for a long time. God bless you and your family. Zach was definatley a special boy, every time I think of Zach and family I hug my kids just a little tighter! Thanks for sharing your amazing son with us!!
Lindsay Clark <jlc0731@hotmail.com>
Greensburg, PA - Tuesday, June 20, 2006 9:51 PM CDT

So sorry for your loss. I have a nephew also battling Neuroblastoma. Your son sounds like a very special soul and he is comforting you with all of the special memories you have of him. Thinking of you.
Deb Maher <season324@aol.com>
Libertyville, IL - Tuesday, June 20, 2006 7:35 PM CDT

I have one of those funny Zach stories---
One day at lunch a bunch of us kids sat down at the same table with Zach. We all had our "yummy" school lunches and he just had a bottle of water. Zach took a sip of his water and looked up at all of us and said, "Well I don't know about you guys, but I'm stuffed."
It's one of those things I love looking back on, just like you. I know I'm speaking for a lot of people when I say Zach was so loved and will missed, but most of all he left a huge impression in our hearts, that will always be apart of us. So, thank you Zach, thank you for causing me to look at life, people, and the world in a whole new way.

Love Always,
Gabrielle Dagit and Family
Gabi Dagit <Dramabelle92@yahoo.com>
Pekin, IL U.S.A. - Tuesday, June 20, 2006 6:47 PM CDT

I have a funny story about the picture of Tim and Zach getting their hair highlighted.
Mandi was putting the color on Tims hair. You know how sensitive of skin he has. He kept freaking out b/c he was getting chemical burns on his forhead. So I had to get him a wet paper towel to put on his head. Next thing we know he is yelling "my back my back" I take the paper towel to wipe what we thought had dripped off his head onto his back. Tim is having a cow. As I'm wiping I look up and Zachary is standing by the door laughing with a water spray bottle in his hand. He had sprayed all over Tims back. We had a great laugh at Tim.

Amber <amber@abelvault.com>
Manito, Il - Tuesday, June 20, 2006 4:30 PM CDT

I am so sorry for your loss. I suddenly lost my sister on May 19th and I am having a hard time dealing with that. I cannot imagine losing my child. My thoughts and prayers are with you all . How is Kris doing? I know they were close and being so young it is hard.
Lisa <samlorrie@tds.net>
NH USA - Tuesday, June 20, 2006 10:27 AM CDT

Hi to Zach's family. I started following Zach's web page after finding a link to his site from Anthony Ford's web page, which I got from a friend. I have followed these two guys for quite some time and have been saddened over the last several weeks to read of their passing, first Anthony and then Zachary. I do believe, as you do, however, that they are in heaven now, free of pain and free of this awful, awful disease. I am always given hope by reading both of these sites, keeping me in check that even though I may have problems in my life, they are small compared to what these young people have endured. Thank you for allowing us all to have just a peek at Zachary's life and now your lives.
Jodi K. <tjklein@swwnet.com>
Avoca, MN - Tuesday, June 20, 2006 9:56 AM CDT

I started reading Zach's site about a year or so ago from the link on Anthony's page. The Fords used to live next door and our dog would play with Anthony all the time. Anthony and Zach are two amazing kids who taught all of us how to stay positive no matter what's going on in life.

Helen <ciscocat1@yahoo.com>
Rapidan, MN USA - Monday, June 19, 2006 11:14 PM CDT

I was brought to your site about a year or so ago, through Shane Rezmer's. I kept coming back to read about the great connection that you and Zachary had. Nice to see that you are coping well, and have many happy memories.
Christopher
Bay City, MI USA - Monday, June 19, 2006 11:01 PM CDT

hey sis hey i dont know if i said anything to ya sun. but if ya need me at all just call me and ill be there!! even if i have to call into work they dont care and understand. i love you !! its been real hard for me lately. i still have a hard time showing emotion in front of people, but when im alone the tears dont stop!! i miss him sooo much!!! its just not fair. i dont know if ya heard of that woman that is always on montell and can reach out to people on the other side. i always question that and if thats true. but wouldnt it be awsome to have her tell us stuff that zach wants to say to us!!?? i just think of alot of crazy stuff now. u know me im the wierd sis!! LOL all i do know though is he is pain free and thats all i can tell my self to help me, and puts a smile on my face. and gohsts is there such a thing as that!!?? hmmm makes ya wonder at least me!! hes such an amazing nephew!!! i just wish none of this sickness existed and he could still be here with us and watch him get old. i miss ya zachy!!
aunt mandi to teen wonder <justus3deakins@sbcglobal.net>
- Monday, June 19, 2006 10:02 PM CDT

Hi, I've signed on a couple of times. I found Zach's site through the Lunch for Life site. My sister's best friend lost her son to NB, now I follow a lot of kids through their sites. I check almost every day, so I'm one of the reasons the counter goes up. I am so sorry Zach passed. He was just so truly amazing. I love to read your stories, even though I never met any of you. I have 2 small children (ages 5 and 3) and of course, this is all very scary. I am so glad your Zachary left you with the fondest memories one could have. And his Faith was just amazing. His wanting to hang on because God wanted him to talk to one more person, even though he never knew who that person was. Those are all your gifts to KNOW that he is now perfectly fine in Heaven. I think of you, Kylee and your husband very often. And I checked in on Anthony too. I cannot believe your son and nephew have both passed away. That is so tragic. I will continue to pray for all of you. just writing because you requested it. Keep the lovely stories coming!!

Sincerely,
Gina
Gina Barnes <ginabarnes@comcast.net>
Olney, MD - Monday, June 19, 2006 9:16 PM CDT

I've followed Zach's story for almost a year now. I have been amazed at the strength of this family; God given strength!
What a blessing your amazing son was and is, not just to his family, but to the many lives of people he will never meet. Simply amazing...
Lisa Paredes <loumicsmom@comcast.net>
Cedar Hill, TX USA - Monday, June 19, 2006 8:41 PM CDT

Nikki,
I think about you and Zach every single day. I miss you! Know that many hugs and prayers and a lot of love are pouring out to you over the miles. Thank you for sharing Zach with us. I love to read the stories you share.

Much love,
Jen
www.caringbridge.com/va/jacob_bollinger <kjenwhit@verizon.net>
Staunton, VA - Monday, June 19, 2006 5:10 PM CDT

I noticed Zachary's site while reading Aaron Hunter's site and have read it for months. I know Aaron's Mom. Reading Zachary's site has touched me in many ways. First and foremost, I have learned not to take anything for granted. I too have a Zachery, he's a very playful, awnry 7 year old. I charish each moment I have with him, get all the hugs I can and I've learned that everything else can wait, because my time with him his precious. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
Jan Martin <jan@chasebldgil.com>
Pekin, IL USA - Monday, June 19, 2006 8:43 AM CDT

I came across Zach's website a few months ago and was touched by his story. I prayed and continue to pray for you and your family.
Staci Sailor
Greensburg, PA USA - Monday, June 19, 2006 8:39 AM CDT

You and your entire family continues to be in my daily thoughts and prayers. I'm glad Zach is no longer in pain, but I can only imagine how your heart aches.

The Brown Family <brown_michelle_L@cat.com>
Manito, IL - Monday, June 19, 2006 8:39 AM CDT

Nikki,
I still check out Zachary's site to see how all of you are doing. You will continue to be in my prayers. The grieving process hits each person differently. I know that 5 months without my big brother is harder now than the first month. Know that there are many people out there praying for each of you. Take your time & do what feels good for you & your family. Zachary has certainly inspired me to be a better person just by reading about him on his web page over the last year or so. I never met your precious boy in person but just by the entries you have written about him tell about the wonderful young man that he had become. Remember it is OK to cry because those are the healing tears.
Jan Karels(friend of the Ford's)

Jan Karels <jgkarels@cgintl.com>
- Monday, June 19, 2006 8:15 AM CDT

Although I have been reading the updates for many, many months, I have never signed the guestbook. Your family have been (and will continue to be) in my prayers. Stay strong.
Lisa Abston <lisasunnydelight@aol.com>
Memphis, TN USA - Monday, June 19, 2006 8:00 AM CDT

Nikki~ Just dropping by to let you know that you've been on my mind alot the last couple of days! I know that God does that so we'll pray so - I PRAYED! ALOT! And I will continue to... I hope you are all loving eachother and coping with your loss a little better each day. I am sure that it will never go away but just know that we are praying that your love for one another will help you to move through your days ahead. And that you will feel Zachary around you in everything you do. We love you all~ kate Hebb
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Monday, June 19, 2006 7:42 AM CDT

How has Zach changed my life? My husband and I were married April 29th, 2006 and through all of the marriage classes we were to come up with a family plan. We thought, well we would like 5 years before any children so that we can get caught up on finances and do what we would like to do. However, if I could be so blessed to have children like yours, I want to start today. There is not one vacation or purchasing any item that would hold more importance in my heart. Thank you for your stories...and than you Zach for helping me realize what really matters...family.
Sara B <Urawesome6939@yahoo.com>
Madison, WI - Monday, June 19, 2006 7:06 AM CDT

Hi Nikki,

Like many others i have been reading for many months but have never left a message. Zach's faith and his ability to think of others above and beyond himself has been so inspiring. His courage and bravery and the strength he showed to fight for so many years (and yours also) is amazing. What a wonderful boy. He truly was a teen hero!

Laree
Laree Thorsby <lareethorsby@msn.com>
Huntingfield, Tas Australia - Monday, June 19, 2006 2:37 AM CDT

I've been coming by for some time now; never left a message. Your son has so touched me what a fighter to the end and HIS way too!!!! My thoughts and prayers are with you. I have no idea how I even found his site!!! Interesting huh?????
Marie
Marie <mtvass@charter.net>
Taylors, SC USA - Monday, June 19, 2006 0:01 AM CDT

Hi Nikki, Kylee, & John,
Just checked you're web site and saw your request for us to enter something. We check this site about every 3-4 days, but you are in our thoughts EVERY DAY and we're praying that God will give you the strength to face each new day without Zach. Just knowing that he is with our Loving Father and NOT in pain has to give some comfort. Please give Kylee all the love and attention you can (and a hug from us), and you and John take care of each other, especially while your healing from your loss. I'm sure that Zach is watchiang over you and smiling.
Love,
Sheila & Gary S.
Sheila & Gary S. <rja3@mtco.com>
Pekin, IL USA - Sunday, June 18, 2006 10:03 PM CDT

I have followed Zack's story for sometime. He always amazed me on his Faith. When things get tough for me I thing of Zack and just remember how faithfully his is. Also I pray everyday that God will help be as good as a mom that you are. I pray that I can make my kids feel as special as you do. I thank Jesus that he showed me this site I have learned so much for just reading about your family. I work with your grandma at Casey's I would always ask her how is Zack and she would always smile and tell me about his faith. God bless you and I want you to know that I think your a GREAT MOM!!!!!
Andy, Melissa, Jayla & Jacob Rasmussen <amrasmussen@insightbb.com>
North Pekin , IL - Sunday, June 18, 2006 9:53 PM CDT

Nikki,
I'm a friend of Chassitys. My son Matthew just finished up his treatment for leukemia. I've been following you guys for awhile, ever since Chassity told me about her pal Zach!!!Your faith has strenghtened mine. Zach's faith, wow, somedays I just needed to stop by, and read some encouraging words. Not many people share this faith, the strength of it, how we can draw so deeply from Jesus. Alot of people don't understand and think it's not real or they think it's not for today. You always confirmed it for me when I needed it. I loved hearing all about the good and bad times. Your son is a man of god!!!!!You have faith like moses's mother. I have been praying that you receive the comfort and peace that you need. Can't wait to meet Zach in person, when we have our reunion with Jesus.
Love,
Katie Lozada, Mom to Super Matthew
Katie Lozada Matthew's Page <katielozada@adelphia.net>
Spotsylvania, va - Sunday, June 18, 2006 4:14 PM CDT

I have followed Zach's story for some time, although we don't know each other. I found about Zach through my son's very dear friend Jacob Bollinger. Jacob has become quite important to my son and our family, and I am very much enjoying getting to know his mom more and more. Zach's story has been important to me as well, I have checked this site daily for well over a year. I admire your strength and your overwhelming love for your children. I will continue to check in and to grow and learn from you, I am sure. Peace to you, Jelisa
Jelisa Coltrane Wolfe <wolfed@ntelos.net>
Staunton, VA - Sunday, June 18, 2006 3:29 PM CDT

I've followed Zach's journey for a long time, and don't know if I've ever signed the book or not. My prayers continue to be with you as you go through the days. I believe Zach is watching over you, and I know he is healed, happy, and in the presence of the Lord!!!
Sincerely,
Tracy Jones
Kingsport, TN USA - Sunday, June 18, 2006 8:39 AM CDT

What a lovely positive story about Zachary. Love and prayers for you all as you make it through these early days without your dear Zachary, son, brother, grandson and friend - and much more.
Lisa Burt <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
England - Sunday, June 18, 2006 6:26 AM CDT

Still praying for you and Kylee as you all heal and adjust... Thank goodness for the love of God to comfort and protect you! I will not stop the prayers! You all take care~ Kate Hebb
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Friday, June 16, 2006 11:38 PM CDT

Held - Natalie Grant
Genre : Christian

Two months is too little.
They let him go.
They had no sudden healing.
To think that providence would
Take a child from his mother while she prays
Is appalling.

Who told us we�d be rescued?
What has changed and why should we be saved from nightmares?
We�re asking why this happens
To us who have died to live?
It�s unfair.

Chorus:
This is what it means to be held.
How it feels when the sacred is torn from your life
And you survive.
This is what it is to be loved.
And to know that the promise was
When everything fell we�d be held.

This hand is bitterness.
We want to taste it, let the hatred NUMB our sorrow.
The wise hands opens slowly to lilies of the valley and tomorrow.

(Chorus)
This is what it means to be held.
How it feels when the sacred is torn from your life
And you survive.
This is what it is to be loved.
And to know that the promise was
When everything fell we�d be held.

Bridge:
If hope is born of suffering.
If this is only the beginning.
Can we not wait for one hour watching for our Savior?

(Chorus)
This is what it means to be held.
How it feels when the sacred is torn from your life
And you survive.
This is what it is to be loved.
And to know that the promise was
When everything fell we�d be held.

CASTING CROWNS LYRICS

"Praise You In This Storm"

I was sure by now God you would have reached down
and wiped our tears away,
stepped in and saved the day.
But once again, I say amen
that it's still raining
as the thunder rolls
I barely hear your whisper through the rain,
I'm with you
and as your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away.

Chorus:
And i'll praise you in this storm
and i will lift my hands
that you are who you are
no matter where I am
and every tear I've cried
you hold in your hand
you never left my side
and though my heart is torn
I will praise you in this storm

I remember when I stumbled in the wind
you heard my cry you raised me up again
my strength is almost gone how can I carry on
if I can't find you
and as the thunder rolls
I barely hear you whisper through the rain
I'm with you
and as your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away

Chorus
And i'll praise you in this storm
and i will lift my hands
that you are who you are
no matter where I am
and every tear I've cried
you hold in your hand
you never left my side
and though my heart is torn
I will praise you in this storm

I lift my eyes unto the hills
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth
I lift my eyes unto the hills
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth

Chorus
And i'll praise you in this storm
and i will lift my hands
that you are who you are
no matter where I am
and every tear I've cried
you hold in your hand
you never left my side
and though my heart is torn
I will praise you in this storm

I'm not sure how I stumbled across your site, but I continue to pray for you.
Thought this songs might be helpful.
Praying for you.
Heather
- Friday, June 16, 2006 3:53 PM CDT

Dear Nikki,

How my heart breaks for you. I pray that God just wraps Himself around you and comforts you.

I think of you often and hope you are doing as well as can be expected. Take it one day at a time.

I have something for you from the book Hugs for the Hurting� I thought of you.

When you feel confused and uncertain of your future, what is the one thing you can absolutely, unquestionably trust? Let me give you a few hints: It�s strong enough to move mountains, it�s gentle enough to wipe the tear from a child�s cheek, it�s enduring enough to withstand any crisis, it�s healing enough to mend the most broken heart, it�s faithful enough to stay when everything else has left or been lost.

It�s love. Authentic, anchored, life-altering love. It is God�s love. Don�t waste your time pursuing anything else. Everything else will fail you. Nothing else satisfies, heals, protects, or provides like God�s love.

When you call, He comes. When you cry, He tastes salt. When you can�t get up, He lifts you. When you pray for His presence, don�t be surprised if you hear a comforting voice in your spirit saying, �I�m already here�.

Then, as you lay in the lap of His love, you can look into His eyes and say, "I knew you would come�.

Grab hold of your faith and remember that Zach is always the sunshine in your day.

All my love,

Julie

Julie Singley <rjms99@insightbb.com>
Green Valley, IL USA - Friday, June 16, 2006 2:15 PM CDT

Praying for you today more than ever! I hope you feel God's comforting arms and Zachary's warm smile when you close your eyes. I am praying for you to get a peaceful night sleep and wake up tomorrow to a new day... Better thatn the one before! I will continue to check in... Love and prayers~ Kate
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Thursday, June 15, 2006 10:58 PM CDT

My precious Nikki,

My heart so hurts for you. I wish the pain could be taken away. I wish I had words that would work. I am sorry but I don't. Please remember that you are on my mind and in my prayers constantly. I pray GOD's strength and comfort for you. Please crawl up in HIS arms and get some rest tonight.

Love in CHRIST,
Phyllis
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Thursday, June 15, 2006 9:48 PM CDT

Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers. Just know that Zachary is looking down on you with that big smile of his knowing you truly know he is okay. Your were truly blessed to have all the signs that Zach gave you before he went to Heaven that he would be okay - when you get down please remember those signs and know he is embracing you if only in spirit. I'll continue to pray that HE gives you strength to cope. God Bless!
Kelly Ellsworth
MI USA - Thursday, June 15, 2006 6:49 PM CDT

Hello my name is Hollie and my daughter earned her wings on May 21, 2006 after fighting for fifteen month with stage IV NB. Abbigail use to tell me that she loves me up to the sky and heaven and all the way down to China. I so miss her laugh and holding her. She was only four and her death was a surprise to us. I hope that you are doing well and can see the good memories in your dreams.

Hollie

www.caringbridge.org/fl/angelsforabbigail
Hollie Rogers <hollieabbigail@yahoo.com>
Deltona, FL USA - Wednesday, June 14, 2006 4:14 PM CDT

Nikki~ I just wanted to let you know that I still check your site every day and pray for you and your family! I hope that God is showing himself to you in a new way every day and that you feel Zachary's love surrounding you every step of your day! Praying~ Kate Hebb
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, pa - Wednesday, June 14, 2006 10:50 AM CDT

Nikki,
We think of you all every day. Yesterday, Keith and I were walking somewhere and I was talking about our next St. Jude check up - I'm thinking of driving instead of flying, and some of my ideas, and I found myself saying, as I SO often do, Nikki and Zach this or that..... And it hit my heart all over again. I can't get used to the idea that we won't see him again here on earth. Your journals are so beautiful and so brave, and yet how your heart must hurt so deeply. As always, trying to be brave and make sure everyone else is okay.... There's no guessing where Zach got this from!

With love and prayers,
Jen, Keith, Angel, Jacob
www.caringbridge.com/va/jacob_bollinger <kjenwhit@verizon.net>
VA - Wednesday, June 14, 2006 10:02 AM CDT

It was really good to see you last night Nikki. Thanks for sharing stories about Zack. You have been blessed incredibly. Love ya!
Jenny Otte <yippiehoo@seehearworks.com>
East Peoria, IL USA - Wednesday, June 14, 2006 7:24 AM CDT

Thinking of you, your prince, and your princess.

Love

Colleen K.
Colleen M. Kashino
- Tuesday, June 13, 2006 11:53 PM CDT

My son was born on 8-1-79. I loved what it said about being born on that day. He is and always will be the light of my life. He reminds me a lot of Zach. My son tells me everyday he loves me. Draw strength and comfort in the difficult days ahead knowing how many lives Zach has touched.
Rosie <heb4@adelphia.net>
Windham, ME - Tuesday, June 13, 2006 8:17 AM CDT

hi nikki, john & kylee~ i wanted you to know that i think of you guys ALOT & wonder how you are doing. i think of how different life must be for all of you now. kylee is such a sweetie, take extra good care of her & hold onto every precious memory you all shared with zach. yes, he is perfect now in heaven. he touched so many of us..thank you,zach,we miss you so much.
kim meints
pekin, il usa - Tuesday, June 13, 2006 0:41 AM CDT

I hope you have had a good weekend. Thank you for sharing Zach with those of us who did not have the pleasure of knowing him. I love reading the stories. How are the vacation plans coming? Please remember that I am still continously praying for ya'll. Have a great week.

Love in CHRIST,
Phyllis
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Sunday, June 11, 2006 7:51 PM CDT

Such strength you have and I know it all comes from your faith and knowing that Zach is finally pain free and happy. He will watch over you until you are united again. You are close to our hearts and in our thoughts and prayers daily.
Heather Wilds <widls6@cox.net>
Newport News, va - Saturday, June 10, 2006 8:12 PM CDT

I am glad that you realize that Zach had a mission here on earth and achieved it before he left, Anthony too had a mission and it was very important that he finished what he came here to do, we all have a mission. What we do next is very important, we need to grieve, but we also need to remember the love they gave us, the strength we got from them, and the lessons we learned from them and use those things to help keep us going. Stay strong and keep his memory clear as a bell. Remember this, that when you think of Zach it is okay to cry, but always remember to end it with a smile.
Michael Ford(Anthony's Dad) <mrford@hickorytech.net>
Mankato, mn USA - Saturday, June 10, 2006 12:26 AM CDT

Nikki,

i've been thinking of and missing hearing about Zach a lot,reading about such precious memories made me smile and i thank you for sharing such personal moments with us all.
You were blessed with such an amazing young man and i know you're so rightly proud of that,
remebering him always,
Theresa
Cancer Warriors
Theresa Heath <theresa@cancerwarriors.org>
Rowlett, Tx - Saturday, June 10, 2006 7:00 AM CDT

Hi Nikki,

Stopped by tonight to check on you. So glad I did - what a beautiful story you wrote. Thank you for sharing it. Hope you are feeling well.

Love, hope, peace, strength, prayers, grace -

Colleen Kashino
Colleen M. Kashino
- Saturday, June 10, 2006 1:17 AM CDT

Hi Nikki, Just want you to know I'm thinking of you every day. I know your heart is aching without your Zachary here. I know you must miss him so much. Thank you for sharing the story of Zach's final moments. I'm glad the entire family was able to be there.
Gina <gbooth@insightbb.com>
Groveland, IL - Friday, June 9, 2006 9:49 PM CDT

Thank you for sharing the precious time you had with Zachary at the end of his earthly life - and how wonderful that he had everyone around him. You are all in my prayers every day, Someone told me that Heaven contains no concept of time so no one who goes there ever misses those they have left behind - to them it is just a heartbeat until everyone is together. I like this version of Heaven, so I hope Zachary is running, playing, doing what ever he wants to do. He so deserves his new found freedom. Love to you all.
Lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
England - Friday, June 9, 2006 2:12 PM CDT

Good Morning my precious friends,
I hope you have wonderful day. I pray GOD's strength and comfort for all of you.

Love in CHRIST,
Phyllis
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Friday, June 9, 2006 6:30 AM CDT

Nikki, John & Kylee, Thinking & praying for all of you as you go thru each day without your precious Zachary. Hold on to one another and the wonderful memories you have shared. It sounds like you are off to make some new memories while your Angel Zach watches over you.
Jan Karels (Friend of Ford's)
Jan Karels <jgkarels@cgintl.com>
- Thursday, June 8, 2006 7:19 AM CDT

I hope you have a great "SON"-filled day.

Love in CHRIST,
Phyllis
Phyllis <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Thursday, June 8, 2006 7:17 AM CDT

Our prayers are with you all for comfort and peace. Our hearts break for your loss.
Christy and Tim Smith
caringbridge.org/nv/baileyaustinjohnson
Bailey's Nonny and Papa <csmithnonny@charter.net>
Genoa, NV USA - Thursday, June 8, 2006 0:30 AM CDT

Nikki, John, & Kylee,
I am in constant prayer for ya'll. How are the vacation plans coming? I know that ya'll could sure use the break and make some good new memories.

Love in CHRIST,
Phyllis
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Wednesday, June 7, 2006 10:35 PM CDT

Nikki, John, Kylee, and family,
I have been thinking of you all every day. The website is simply beautiful and amazing. What a testament to the love you have for Zach that you have created such a beautiful page! How you must miss him.

Please let Kris know we are praying for him too. It must be hard for him as well.

We love you all.
Jen and Jacob
www.caringbridge.com/va/jacob_bollinger <kjenwhit@verizon.net>
- Wednesday, June 7, 2006 10:21 PM CDT

Hey Nikki,
You have been on my mind a lot today. I hope everything is okay. I want you to know that you have been lifted high in my prayers today.

In HIS grip,
Phyllis
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Tuesday, June 6, 2006 9:36 PM CDT

HI Kylee guess who this is? KYLEE ALEXANDER!!!!!! I hope you liked your stuffed animals and I hope that you are ok.
Nikki I hope you taking it ok too. I miss Zach even though I didn't know him very well. I'm your friend, BYE!
Kylee Alexander
Pekin, IL. USA - Tuesday, June 6, 2006 6:07 PM CDT

Such a smile even as recent as a couple of weeks ago,thank you for sharing your precious photographs Nikki.
I was just thinking of you Zach,i hope you're able to see this and if you are remember we love and miss you very much.
Love as always,
Theresa
Exceutive Director
Cancer Warriors Angel Network
www.cancerwarriors.org
Theresa Heath <theresa@cancerwarriors.org>
Rowlett, Tx - Tuesday, June 6, 2006 2:58 PM CDT

Nikki, John, & Princess Kylee,
I hope you are having a good week. Thank you for sharing the pictures of Zach. I pray that ya'll can have a wonderful vacation. All three of you deserve it. I will be praying that things work out for you. have a good night and rest in HIS arms.

Love in CHRIST,
Phyllis
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Monday, June 5, 2006 10:52 PM CDT

Our hearts go out to you all daily!!! I still check in on you each day and continue to pray! Let Kylee know too that we lift her up special each day before the Lord and it is so wonderful to have God's promises to cling to! A vacation for the three of you will probably be just what you need to enjoy eachother away from all the hustle and bustle of everyday life... Time to make new memories to hold on to forever and just really love on eachother! We will continue to lift you up before the Lord daily. You all takae care~ Kate Hebb and family
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Monday, June 5, 2006 10:33 AM CDT

Nikki,John, & Kylee,
Please know that we are in constant prayer for all three of you. I can't even begin to know what you are going through. I am praying GOD's strength, comfort, and grace for you. I hope your week goes well.

Love in CHRIST,
Phyllis
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Monday, June 5, 2006 7:09 AM CDT

i know that zach & chad creech were smiling down on us on saturday for the chad creech fun walk!! what a beautiful day it was...i was SOOOO proud of kayla, kris, chad, jenny, katie mac, gabi, ale', hollie & sarah & her mom for doing the walk!!!thanks kids! you are an amazing group of teenagers...zach was blessed to have you all as his friends!!
kim meints <meints5@msn.com>
pekin, il usa - Sunday, June 4, 2006 11:19 PM CDT

My thoughts and prayers are with you all. If you could ever bear to do it could we possibly see a photo from Zachs graduation - such a special special thing for him to have - he gave so much love, but inspired loads to be returned to him too. Heaven is a richer place for Zachs arrival.
Lisa Burt <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
England - Sunday, June 4, 2006 4:25 PM CDT

Nikki,
I am Christian Brown's chemo angel and I wanted to say how sorry I am for your loss. Looking through Zach's site here, I know what a special, wonderful and brave young man he was. My heart, thoughts and prayers are with you.
Shannon VanSlambrouck <shazjo@comcast.net>
- Sunday, June 4, 2006 8:37 AM CDT

Hi, I just wanted to stop by and say how sorry I am to hear about the loss of your son Zach. I heard about him on the CancerWarriors web page, and just wanted to pass on my condolences. There are no words of comfort at this time, just know that people who you never met are thinking of you, and thinking of Zach.
Take care of yourselves.
hugs
Cat
Cat <lifelongblade@hotmail.com>
England - Sunday, June 4, 2006 6:46 AM CDT

Nikki,
we've been gone for a week but i came and checked on you as soon as i could after we got back,my hearts been with you all week and my thoughts have often wandered off to Zach this week as well .. I can't imagine how hard the last weeks been for you all,i know Zach is close to you always though.
My thoughts and prayers are with you,
Theresa
Executive Director
Cancer Warriors Angel Network
www.cancerwarriors.org
Theresa Heath <theresa@cancerwarriors.org>
Rowlett, Tx - Saturday, June 3, 2006 11:28 PM CDT

Nikki, you have all been on my mind since the graduation on Wednesday evening. It was an honor to be there to see them retire Zach's basketball number.

All you can do Nikki is live one day at a time. No one should expect anything less. What you have done for Zach the past 9 years is awesome, you were chosen to be Zach's mom because God knew you would do everthing for your son. Not only this awful cancer that robbed us of Zach, but how you nourished him and provided a Christian home and taught him about the love our Savior has for us. Zach then taught us about his faith and love for Jesus. What an example.
God's peace to you Nikki. All our love,
Roy, Julie and Maddie
Julie Singley <rjms99@insightbb.com>
Green Valley, IL USA - Friday, June 2, 2006 3:53 PM CDT

I truly pray for your comfort - I am so sorry for your loss.
Linda
Iowa City, IA USA - Friday, June 2, 2006 10:56 AM CDT

My deepest sympathy is with each one of you for your loss. Even though I didn't know Zach or any of you personally, I felt like I did through this website and from the occassional updates I would get when I talked to Mary Ann Arnold (a friend of mine that I used to work with). Reading this website almost daily has strengthened my faith and has given me a lot of peace when dealing with feelings and issues I face because of my dad's fight with terminal lung cancer. I thank Zach and YOU for that!

God bless each one of you!
Michelle Brown <brown_michelle_l@cat.com>
Manito, IL - Friday, June 2, 2006 6:49 AM CDT

Hey guys,
You have really been on my mind today. I hope you have had an okay day. I was reading the entry from Kristopher's mom, what another awesome young man he seems to be. Zach and Kris were so blessed to have that special friendship. Please let Kris know that we are continuing to pray for him too. I hope you have a restful weekend. Crawl up into HIS arms and let him hold you and love on you.

Love in CHRIST,
Phyllis
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Thursday, June 1, 2006 8:28 PM CDT

Thinking of your family today! You will continue to be in my prayers! God Bless You All!
Amy Robertson
Greenfield, IN - Thursday, June 1, 2006 1:13 PM CDT

My thoughts and prayers are with all of you.
Sara B <Urawesome6939@yahoo.com>
Madison, WI - Thursday, June 1, 2006 12:19 AM CDT

John, Nikki, Kylee,
Our family has become so tied to yours through Kristopher. Words can no longer express the depth of appreciation and love we have for your family. Asking Kris to stand up with the family at the visitation just overwhelmed us. He was asked at just the right time - when he was feeling his loss the most, and worried about losing his connection to your family. The love and affection everyone showed him has helped him so much. The shadowbox and Illini basketball will be treasured, and given a special place in our home. We will always include your family in our prayers, asking God to give you all comfort and strength.
Love, Mary Ann, Dave & Kristopher
Vaupel family <madk84@grics.net>
Pekin, IL - Thursday, June 1, 2006 10:59 AM CDT

You have my deepest condolences on your loss of Zach. As I've said before, he was a truly amazing young man who was lucky to have you as his mother, Kylee as his loving sister and very lucky that John came into his life as well. And I can't forget that great friend of his, Kris. You can rest assured that he went to Heaven a very happy, nurtured person who will be missed by people like me who came to love and admire him through your website.
Brenda McCarthy <rbmccarthy@casscomm.com>
Virginia, IL - Thursday, June 1, 2006 10:16 AM CDT

I just wanted you to know that I'm praying for you and your Angel Boy.I read about you through The Wallin's,in Chillicothe.It's so so sad to see all the mom's who have to go through this.God Bless You and Yours,Jackie Miller
Jackie Miller <krazychain@yahoo.com>
Chillicothe, Il. usa - Thursday, June 1, 2006 10:03 AM CDT

Nikki and family, I just wanted to let you know I am thinking of you and praying for you.

Jen, Jacob, Keith, Angel
www.caringbridge.com/va/jacob_bollinger <kjenwhit@verizon.net>
- Thursday, June 1, 2006 6:10 AM CDT

I am very sorry for your loss. I came upon this website from another neuroblastoma parent. Your son seemed like an incredible young man who I am sure you are very proud. These children are the "true heroes of the world". Each one in their own unique way carry their cross with courage and are always thinking of others.

Debbie Sypek <sy1025@comcast.net>
West Springfield, MA USA - Wednesday, May 31, 2006 7:07 PM CDT

I am so very sorry for your loss of Zach. My sincerest condolences to you and your family.

Shay <smcdonald@loyola.edu>
Ashburn, VA USA - Wednesday, May 31, 2006 4:08 PM CDT

I'm very uncertain about the time difference between England and where you are - but I'm guessing Zach's service is sometime around now. You are all in my thoughts - especially Kylee, this is so hard for her. Love and prayers for you all.
Lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
England - Wednesday, May 31, 2006 2:09 PM CDT

You guys are in my prayers as the time for Zach's services draws close. I pray that it will be a celebration of his life. He was such a special young man.

Love,
Phyllis
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Wednesday, May 31, 2006 12:26 AM CDT

MY DEEPEST CONDOLENCES TO YOU AND YOUR FAMILY. WHAT A WARRIOR - HE WON THE BIGGEST BATTLE.

So very sorry for your loss.
Linda
Iowa City, IA USA - Wednesday, May 31, 2006 11:06 AM CDT

I'm sorry to read of your wonderful son's passing. This is the first time I've been to his site, but after reading, he sounds like he was a wonderful wonderful kid. Heaven will be brighter with his presence. I'm praying for your family in your days ahead and learning to live without the earthly presence of your sweet boy.
Angie / Angel-Wings <stewwwy64@yahoo.com>
Edmond, OK - Wednesday, May 31, 2006 10:31 AM CDT

I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I found you all through someone elses site. What a wounderful guy he was and will continue to be. Your pain and suffering right now hits to close to home as we lost our son to NB one year ago in July. In my experience with loss the pain never goes away it is always there with every memory its just that you learn to live with that pain and turn it into something positive. May God be with you in the days and months to come. You and your family will be in my prayers.
Jamie Angel Camerons mommy forever <jamie.carey@cox.net www.caringbridge.org/ok/cameronc>
ok - Wednesday, May 31, 2006 10:00 AM CDT

Nikki, John, & Kylee,
I pray that you feel the prayers that are going out for you today. I pray for GOD's strength, comfort, grace, and peace. You will be constantly on my mind today.

Love in CHRIST,
Phyllis
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Wednesday, May 31, 2006 8:22 AM CDT

Thinking of you and praying for you all today.
Lisa Burt <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
England - Wednesday, May 31, 2006 7:53 AM CDT

zach i love u allways and 4 everlove is strong andd so are you i want u to know that I have had a crasy day and i thought of you and it made it all better love ya <3
lindsey schlottman <loueygirl13@yahoo.com>
pekin , IL USA - Tuesday, May 30, 2006 5:02 PM CDT

My thoughts and prayers are with you. Zach was truly a hero!
MaryLou Wescott <maryloupy@netzero.net>
- Tuesday, May 30, 2006 4:02 PM CDT

Nikki, I wanted to let you know that my green balloon from Zach's graduation party is STILL floating at my house. I never knew a balloon could last that long....I wanted to let you know I'm thinking of you.
Gina <gbooth@insightbb.com>
Groveland, - Tuesday, May 30, 2006 1:19 PM CDT

My heart truly breaks for you and your family. Zach has been such an inspiration to so many. I never knew Zach, but I followed his story for the last year and a half. I hoped and prayed this dreadful day would never come. Please know his legacy will live on in our lives, and he will forever be an angel. Jake Widman will be by his side.
Kathy Olson
Wilmette, IL - Tuesday, May 30, 2006 1:16 PM CDT

Nikki,
I am very sorry to hear about Zach, my heart is breaking for you. Zach has always been an angel, and now he has his wings! My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Peace Be With You...

Linda Cool <b.cool@insightbb.com>
N Pekin, Il USA - Tuesday, May 30, 2006 1:07 PM CDT

Nikki, John and Kaylee,
What a wonderful son/brother you were blessed with. He did so much good in his short life, and it sounded like he enjoyed it to the max! Take comfort in knowing that you will see him again, and that he is pain free and in his heavenly body now. Memories of Zach will certainly comfort you. Enjoy your darling Kaylee as well. She has been through this with you, and hopefully is a stronger person for it. You are all in my prayers.
Nancy Scott <nancy.a.scott@wellsfargo.com>
Bloomington, MN - Tuesday, May 30, 2006 12:23 AM CDT

I'm praying for you. Praying that God can find a way to comfort you at a time with nothing on this earth will help. Praying you are able to keep putting one foot in front of the other. Praying you can find something to smile about. Praying you find something to occupy your time that you enjoy. Zach has taught all of us a great lesson, keep believing and know that God is in control so trust Him!

Tammy Hoggatt <tammy.hoggatt@sbcglobal.net>
Champaign, IL - Tuesday, May 30, 2006 11:12 AM CDT

I was lead to your site through another CB site - Your loss is so great - my heart breaks for you - I am, however, struck by the obviousness of Zach as a true and complete messenger of God - his mission was so clear to him - I am awe struck at his knowledge and acceptance of what God was asking him to do and to do it through years of pain and suffering - What a joy he must have been to spend 14 years with and then to realize that you were responsible for bringing an Angel into this world and accompanying him along his journey and path here on Earth - I hope his love for you and his sister and all his family is felt strongly everyday and that he continues to give you many, many signs that he is now rejoicing with his Father - who sent him here to a very special family. How blessed you are and I thank you and Zach for touching lives with his story, his belief, his faith and his love - There were people he was sent to change and help that he never knew existed. I am one! God's peace to you and Zach is now partying with all the CB Angels and smiling that great smile - Have you ever noticed the special smiles our CB angels have! It is God's true light shining through them. I am praying for you and praing to Zach.
Mary H <mch@herzogcrebs.com>
St. Louis, MO - Tuesday, May 30, 2006 9:33 AM CDT

Zachary's Family,
My heart breaks for all of you but it also rejoices that Zachary is now with Jesus in Heaven & is pain free. I know that you will cherish the many happy memories you have of your very special Zachary & his smile is one that can never be forgotten. Your family will continue to be in my prayers for the difficult days ahead. God Bless!
Jan Karels
mankato, mn blue earth - Tuesday, May 30, 2006 8:19 AM CDT

I came to your sons site through Aaron Hunters site.Im wanting to let you know that we too will be thinking of you and knowing that God is carring you when your burdens just seeem to heavy.Keeping you in my prayers!
Tonya and Stormy Lott <plainsmiles722@yahoo.com caringbridge/tn/stormyrlott>
Tracy City, Tn usa - Tuesday, May 30, 2006 1:27 AM CDT

Thank you for sharing your story. I prayed for Zack and will continue to pray for you and your family.
Swannita A. Brown <Swannitarobinson37@yahoo.com>
Peoria, IL Peoria - Monday, May 29, 2006 11:27 PM CDT

Nikki -
I just wanted to let you know that I am thinking of you and your family and praying for you. I am good friends with Marilyn and "our lil' Superhero Aaron" and met you through them. I know that Zach is up in heaving enjoying everything that Jesus has prepared and I smiled when I read your story about the sign you received. I will be thinking of you and praying for you as you take on the next few days.

Take care,
Nicole
Nicole Wood <nwood@northmoor.edisonschools.com>
East Peoria, IL USA - Monday, May 29, 2006 10:55 PM CDT

I know your pain.You are not alone.
My sincere condolances to you.
Love In Christ,
Mrs.Teague

Angela <angelateague@woh.rr.com>
Tipp City, Ohio U.S. - Monday, May 29, 2006 10:55 PM CDT

Nikki, John, and Kylee,
I am so sorry for the pain of Zach's homegoing. I know you know that he is healed, and with Jesus, but for the moment the comfort is little. We will continue to pray for a supernatural touch on your family, that the Lord would rain down His grace over you.
May God bless you and carry you,
Mylissa Horrocks
Mylissa Horrocks
Bella's Caringbridge Site
Habitat for Hope <mylissa@habitatforhope.org>
Cape Coral, FL USA - Monday, May 29, 2006 10:26 PM CDT

We are so sorry to read about your son Zach's passing(learned about your site via another NB child's site). May God grant your family peace during this difficult time.
Linda, Pat & Angel Ryan (www.caringbridge.org/mi/ryanc) <padwik@yahoo.com>
Fenton, MI USA - Monday, May 29, 2006 9:36 PM CDT

My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family. You were blessed to have a angel. The world now has another angel amoung us. I wish I was one of the lucky ones to have met him. I went to school with his Aunt Mandi. May god bless you all.
Gina Anske (Clevenger) <anske77@yahoo.com>
Pekin, Ill - Monday, May 29, 2006 7:24 PM CDT

To all of Zach's family and many friends...our words simply can't express our deepest condolences to you. We continue to pray that you will feel God's and Zach's presence in the days ahead.
Heather Wilds <wilds6@cox.net>
Newport News, VA - Monday, May 29, 2006 4:00 PM CDT

Nikki, I truly believe in those types of signs from above. When Alyssa's dear friend Katie passed away last March, Alyssa was in the hospital. I came into Alyssa's room the morning after Katie's passing and there was a Prayer Card on the foot of Alyssa's bed. I asked Alyssa who had been in to see her and she said "No one." I picked up the prayer card and handed it to her and she looked at it and said.."Mom, this is Katie's favorite prayer." Then Alyssa looked up to the heavens and said."ok Katie, I know your ok and now you are looking out for me." What a special bond those two rowdy teenage girls had. Trust me Nikki when I tell you, Zach did have a purpose! Your family has touched all of us. Alyssa was put back in the hospital yesterday, but she is hoping to be out Tuesday morning so that she can say her "see-ya-laters" to Zach. Alyssa and Katie never said good-bye, only see ya later because they truly know that they will see each other again.
Stephanie Lewellen (Alyssa's mom) <balletmom5@sbcglobal.net>
East Peoria , IL USA - Monday, May 29, 2006 3:23 PM CDT

I am truely very sorry for the loss. I hope..I KNOW he is with God now. He is pain free and having the best time up there. He seemed like a wonderful person. He is greatlygreatlygreatly missed. I would like you to know that I am here for your family. Please feel free to contact me at any time if you need help. I want you to know I love you. Even though i dont know you. haha.
Brandon Hudson <bwjb_ball90@yahoo.com>
Pekin, IL US - Monday, May 29, 2006 11:30 AM CDT

There are no words. Keeping you in our prayers.

www.caringbridge.org/ny/aarons

Nina & Tem <sel_nina@yahoo.com>
Trabuco Canyon, CA - Monday, May 29, 2006 10:10 AM CDT

Nikki this Say the Lord. Don't be afraid, for I am with you. Do not be dismayed for I am your God. I will strengthen you I will help you. I will uphold you with my victorious right hand. Isaiah 41:10
God Bless you and keep you strong

Daisy Peralta <daisyperalta27@aol.com>
New York , NY USA - Sunday, May 28, 2006 10:15 PM CDT

God Speed Zach! You have truly touched my heart! Bless you all!! You will continue to be in my thoughts and prayers!
Amy Robertson <amy.robertson@lilly.com>
Greenfield, IN - Sunday, May 28, 2006 9:56 PM CDT

Nikki Kylee and John,
I am soo sorry to here of your loss. I'm glad that Zach is now pain free and living with our Lord and Savior!!!!!!! He was such a blessing when I worked at the school and had him in latchkey!!!! Our loss is heaven's gain. My sincere condolances to you all.
Heather Schrader <hthrschrdr@yahoo.com>
Pekin, Il US - Sunday, May 28, 2006 7:18 PM CDT

Nikki,
Valerie from St. Jude called me Friday to let me know that Zach is now free. Thank you so very much for thinking of me. My heart goes to you and I truely mean it that if you need ANYTHING - please let me know.

It sounds like you have a great family support, and believe me- you will really appreciate it as you later realize how they help to carry you thru. No words that I could ever say will make any of this better, but I can honestly say that I understand how it feels to lose such a huge part of your heart when your amazing child goes on to Heaven before you- yet somehow you continue to survive even when you feel that it is impossible to endure another day without holding your child, seeing their sweet face, or hearing that oh so wonderful melody of "I love you, Mom" come from their lips.

Even though I and way too many others have experienced the loss of a child to this horrible disease, your grief experience is your own- unique and of course, the worst possible grief to bear. Yet, somehow you will make it. It does give you a warped type of comfort to know that there is someone out there who does understand what you are feeling. Please know that Gary & I think of you, and are only a phone call or email away if you need to talk, cry or just scream. We understand and are going thru these same feelings everyday.

A comforting thought that I had when I heard of Zach's healing was that of Tori riding her giant yellow Tiger Swallowtail butterfly (with a saddle & reigns like a horse) down to Heaven's gate to greet Zach and take him for a ride to "show him around". We both know that Tori & Zach are definately in Heaven, so that gives us the best comfort possible - that one day we will get to reunite with our babies again, and then it will be FOREVER!!!!!!!!!
Angel Tori's Mom (Tori Wheat Neuroblastoma IV 1-24-96 to 10-24-05) <wheatlane@yahoo.com>
Lane, IL USA - Sunday, May 28, 2006 6:53 PM CDT

We're so lucky to have an angel like you looking down on us, Zach. Love & miss you.
Lindsay <lindzers2808@yahoo.com>
Green Valley, Il - Sunday, May 28, 2006 5:53 PM CDT

Dear Nikki and family,
I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your son Zach. I only learnt about him today from Christi's site, I read quite a bit of his site, sounds like he was a great, loving, caring young man. He was obviously so very loved and he loved you so much, you have wonderful memories of him to keep.
I'm praying for you to be at peace knowing that Zach is home with God, no more pain and suffering.
Take care,
Love to all your family,
Angela
Angela <p.sturges@tiscali.fr>
France - Sunday, May 28, 2006 5:49 PM CDT

Dear Nikki, John, & Kylee
I am sooooo sorry for zach. Once i heard, cried & cried. Everytime i see a pic of him i cry. He is in a better place now. He had a great life & you guys were GREAT to him. I just wish i could of gotten to talk to him more, gosh. Well i am praying 4 all of you. Talk to you soon =[

I love all of you
McKenzie Bigliazzi <prpldolphin@insightbb.com>
- Sunday, May 28, 2006 4:58 PM CDT

Dear Nikki and family... I am very sorry for your loss... you are in my thoughts and prayers.
Love, Joy Spacht-Ruach and family <jspachtruach@hotmail.com>
East Peoria, IL United States - Sunday, May 28, 2006 3:38 PM CDT

I would like to extend my sympathies to the Teen Wonder's family and friends. I am sorry for your loss of the wonderful spirit of life he brought, may God bring you peace and love in the treasure of memories that Zak left behind.
Elizabeth <e_spehr_99@yahoo.com>
Washington, DC USA - Sunday, May 28, 2006 1:50 PM CDT

I'd like to pass on my sympathies to Zach's best buddy Kris. Kris this must be a terrible time for you - Zach was a very lucky young man to have such a good friend and you can take comfort from knowing you did a great - and hard job - caring for your friend knowing he wasn't going to be here with you as you grown up. You should be very proud of yourself for being so important to Zach - my prayers are with you all at this time, but today, especially with you Kris.
lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
UK - Sunday, May 28, 2006 12:25 AM CDT

sis!!! well its been so wierd,but i just keep telling myself he is pain free and with our amazing father! been digging trough all my photos all i have to say is for the little time he was on earth we were able to have tons of memories!! and i have you to thank that for! we got to do so much with him. I LOVE YOU ZACH!! well been trying to get things together to head over but every time i have time to get up and get ready i have to stop and take a call. im soooo thankful were such a close family! and that will never ever change.!!!!! i love you guys!!!
aunt mandi <justus3deakins@sbcglobal.net>
- Sunday, May 28, 2006 12:01 AM CDT

Dearest Zach, you are now painfree and among angels. I will miss seeing your smiling face but you'll forever be in my heart.

Nikki, You are in my thoughts and prayers. You are a wonder mom, stay strong and know that we love you.
Michelle <powelltnt@bresnan.net>
Kalispell, MT - Sunday, May 28, 2006 10:20 AM CDT

Nikki: What can I say? My heart is broken at the loss of Zachary. Another angel in heaven. I pray that the Lord wraps his arms around you and helps you get through this trying time in your lives. Take peace in knowing that Zachary is not in anymore pain and is flying high with Jesus. I hope that he meets up with my grandson, Little Alex, who lost his life on 6/6/04 to this same disease. As a Grandmother I know what you are going through to lose someone so young. What a courageous young man he was. He will always be an inspiration to others. Be brave.
Cheryl Renner (Mam-Maw to Angel Alex at caringbridge.org/pa/alexp) <rennerg7@AOL.com>
N. Huntingdon, PA - Sunday, May 28, 2006 7:46 AM CDT

My heart and prayers are with you. Zach was quite the guy.
Thank you for sharing his story with us.
Stephanie and RachelJoy <mom2rj@comcast.net>
- Saturday, May 27, 2006 10:53 PM CDT

Nikki: I know this hard for you, but remember he is walking hand and hand with Jesus, walking on streets of God. You have my sympathy. I know he is happy now. He finished his work here on earth. Keep the faith. Stay strong, remember we are here for you still. May God Bless you and your family especially during these trying times. Praying for you still for you to have strength and peace. Remember joy comes in the morning. Stand on the promises of God. My heart really hurts for you. Love you
Debbie LeBlanc <DebiRLeBlanc@aol.com>
Breaux Bridge, LA USA - Saturday, May 27, 2006 9:16 PM CDT

Nikki, John and Kylie-
My thoughts and prayers are with you. Zach is having a blast in heaven, pain free and able to do anything he wishes. I'm sure his cousin Anthony was waiting to welcome him and they soon will be catching up on their sports together. I will be thinking of you during this time.
Molly Hauge
Mankato, MN - Saturday, May 27, 2006 2:23 PM CDT

I got your web site from Christi Thomas's and I wish to exend my deepest sympathies on the passing of your Zachary. What a handsome gentleman he was.

I will remember your family in my prayers.

Sincerely,
Heather Braswell (Christi's friend)
Heather Braswell <hbrasswe@insight.rr.com>
Columbus, Ohio - Saturday, May 27, 2006 12:30 AM CDT

I am so very very sorry for your loss. My husband graduated from Pekin High School and grew up in Creve Couer. His first introduction to the Lord was a faithful friend in high school. He did not accept the Lord until years later, but looks back at that friend as saving his life. I can only imagine how many lives Zach has touched and what a joy it will be for him to see his harvest at the Resurrection.
Julie <jlpeacock_3@yahoo.com>
MO - Saturday, May 27, 2006 12:08 AM CDT

We pray for peace, comfort and strength for your loss. Zach fought the good fight and has now won the battle in heaven. May you find peace in the knowledge that he is finally cancer-free.
With sorrow,
Christy and Tim Smith
caringbridge.org/nv/baileyaustinjohnson
Bailey's Nonny and Papa <csmithnonny@charter.net>
Genoa, NV USA - Saturday, May 27, 2006 12:05 AM CDT

With deepest sympathy and a flood of tears, I'm heartbroken to learn of your horrendous loss dear Nikki. Please know how much you and Zachary have touched our lives and you all will forever live in our hearts and minds! I love you!
With prayers and tears, Angela (Christi's Mom) <Email@ChristiThomas.com >
OH - Saturday, May 27, 2006 12:01 AM CDT

Me and my family are very sorry for your loss Zach was an amazing friend with a wonderful personality he is missed greatly.
Chad Surratt <rocksolid113@yahoo.com>
Pekin, IL USA - Saturday, May 27, 2006 10:30 AM CDT

John, Nikki, & Kylee,
Logan was a fellow St. Jude patient, he also had neuroblastoma. We are truly saddened by your loss. Our thoughts and prayers are with you...always!
Tom, Tammy, Kyle, Adam, Lindsey & Logan Ripp <thosripp@sbcglobal.net>
PEORIA, IL USA - Saturday, May 27, 2006 9:29 AM CDT

oops! i forgot to ask something...kayla thought that the kids should have shirts made with zach's photo on them, would this be ok? she said that you took a photo of all of them at the hospital on thursday, would that one be alright or just one of zach??? i will check with you later....
kim meints <meints5@msn.com>
pekin, il usa - Saturday, May 27, 2006 8:58 AM CDT

Dearest Nikki,
There are no words to tell you how heartbroken I am that Zachary is no longer with us. I know he is rejoicing in heaven right now, and yet it still hurts that he's not here. How we all will miss him! I have rarely, if ever, seen a mother and son so close and a young man so courageous, compassionate, and humorous. He had a smile all the time - at least if he thought anyone was looking. Zach wanted everyone around him to smile.... most especially you.

You are both an inspiration, and will continue to be. Even though Zach is not with us physically, his life will continue to change people. You both fought so hard and did everything you could. And you made sure Zach got to do anything fun he wanted. That means so much to me, and I know it meant a lot to him. You filled his life with the love and fun he wanted and needed, even imaginary eating big cheeseburgers when he couldn't have anything to eat because of some procedure. From you, I learned more how to find many ways to be happy myself and to create a bubble of happiness around Jacob and I during treatment by making every moment fun and by getting out there and doing stuff!

Zach helped Jacob adjust at St. Jude and was his one really good buddy while we were there. Let me tell you, that is just one more way I know Zach is special! He gave Jacob all those points at Jillian's and we're talking friends forever at that point! :) Seeing Zach smile and how much fun he was having helped Jacob see that he could have fun too. I will never forget all the fun we had together. I think my favorite was the glow in the dark putt putt and the laser tag - even if I was running behind him holding onto that laser vest! Here I was afraid to let him do anything because his balance was so bad, and you got us out there doing all that and more. There just is no way to let you know how much that means and how much we love you. In your own struggle, you showed so much love and caring for others. Both of you. It says so much about how very caring and compassionate Zachary was - he connected with Jacob and showed him all that love and fun. Zach seemed to have a way of knowing what someone needed, when they needed it.

We are always here with you, and we will hurt to share in your pain and we will love to hear you share memories of Zachary.

Love,
Jen and Jacob, Keith and Angel
www.caringbridge.com/va/jacob_bollinger <kjenwhit@verizon.net>
Staunton, VA - Saturday, May 27, 2006 8:58 AM CDT

what a HERO zach is!! my heart broke when i heard the news yesterday, but i know he is healed & in heaven now!nikki, you have been on my mind CONSTANTLY, & john & kylee, too. kayla would LOVE for all of the gsls kids to walk with her at the Chad Creech Fun Walk on june 3rd FOR ZACH!! it's $20 to participate &all the $$$$ goes to st. jude. i think zach would be so proud!! i am going to miss him so much, he was so amazing!! we LOVe ALL of you!! kim, kayla, nick & mason
kim meints <meints5@msn.com>
pekin, il usa - Saturday, May 27, 2006 8:55 AM CDT

My heart goes out to the family of yet another brave NB warrior. I am so saddend to hear of your loss. We will pray for your peace and comfort.

www.caringbridge.com/ny/kendall
Aimee, mom to Kendall and Zachary <aimee1@optonline.net>
Long Island, NY USA - Saturday, May 27, 2006 8:35 AM CDT

Nikki, my heart and prayers go out to you, I have been checking in and reading your post for awhile and stand amazed at how God has working in Zach's life. He was such a strong person and a true blessing to get to know. Please know that you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers for continued peace and comfort during this journey in life. You are loved.
Christina <preciouslandon@gmail.com>
Houston, TX - Saturday, May 27, 2006 8:28 AM CDT

Nikki and Family,
I and my entire family are so saddened by the loss of your beloved son Zach. He was such a wonderful young Man. We have known since the first time we met him eight years ago, that he was a sick child. When I remember back Zach never showed it to anyone or wanted special attention because of his illness. That wonderful young man had so much love for you and your entire family. I believe that everyone who knew Zack was in awe of his courage and strength. He was a fighter and he fought as hard as he could clear up the the end. Nikki I know that you have done for your son everything on this earth that you could do to help you beloved Zach, you have been there for him 24/7 no mother could have done more. Zach is now with our heavenly father at peaceful rest and pain free. We will never forget his sweet smiling face nor the shy way he had about him. Our deepest sympathy goes out to you Nikki, John, Kylee and your entire family. We are praying to our Lord to give you and all of your family strenght to get through this difficult time.
Barbara Richardson <roy12448@sbcglobal.net>
Canton, IL USA - Saturday, May 27, 2006 8:12 AM CDT

Dear Nikki and Family, after reading through many months of your journal, I can certainly see why everyone calls Zach "the Teen Wonder." It is so clear that he is very very special. You have been blessed to have such a heroic, kind, loving, selfless son. I know the pain of losing him is unbearable, and I pray that you will be able to find peace and comfort in the knowledge that he is now free of pain and suffering and with the Lord. Much love and prayers for your family, SHIRLEY (mother of Simon, treated for NB in NYC)
Shirley Staples <staplesvangel@mac.com>
Brooklyn, NY - Saturday, May 27, 2006 8:06 AM CDT

Dear Nikki and Family, I am so sorry to read of your loss, I am glad that he was at peace and was able to verbalize his feelings that his "work" here was done. He is a hero and a wonder and has helped so many others.
God Bless your Angel and your family.
Love, Ellen

http://www.caringbridge.org/ma/seanhanson
Ellen Hanson <ehanson89@aol.com>
Cape Cod, Ma - Saturday, May 27, 2006 7:49 AM CDT

Dear Nikki and family -

My heartfelt sympathy. This child of yours was an incredible example of virtue and strength. I hope you keep your strength and faith in the coming days - Nikki, you are and always will be Mom Wonder of your graceful boy. Bless you all.

Love,

Colleen Kashino

Colleen M. Kashino
- Saturday, May 27, 2006 6:42 AM CDT

Our thoughts and prayers are with you at this time and during the upcoming days. Zach fought this beast with the greatest strength.
Ken and Yvonne Gibson <keng@countyit.com>
Tremont, Il USA - Saturday, May 27, 2006 6:41 AM CDT

Nikki my heart breaks for you as I kinda know the pain you feel. In the same way I know the sense of peace of knowing Zach is pain free and fling high. Please know you and you family will be in my thoughts and prayers as you face the days ahead. Just remember God is holding your hand and Zach is holding the other one as he always has and always will.
I am so sorry... God Be with you...

Sending lots of Love and prayers,
Angel Treys granny 4-ever <jeffandsusie@hughes.net>
Dry Fork, Va - Saturday, May 27, 2006 5:29 AM CDT

Goodbye Sweet, sweet boy. You taught me more than I have the words to express. Fly free sweet Zachary, fly free.
Lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
UK - Saturday, May 27, 2006 1:46 AM CDT

Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family and we rejoice with you knowing that your "teen hero" is with his Creator now. May the peace of Christ be with you and His face shine upon you.
Please let us know if we can do anything for you.

thinkHOPE,
Mark Horrocks
Bella's Caringbridge Site
Habitat for Hope <mark@habitatforhope.org>
Cape Coral - soon to be Memphis, FL/TN USA - Friday, May 26, 2006 11:35 PM CDT

We are praying for peace and comfort in your heart, knowing that Zach is not in pain anymore. We are here if you need us.
Love the Selburg's
Pekin , IL USA - Friday, May 26, 2006 11:23 PM CDT

Nikki
Theresa told me about Zach. What an awesome and brave young man. I just wanted you to know I am thinking of you and your family and keeping you guys in my prayers.
Tammy Caldwell <calltammy@yahoo.com>
Athens, TX - Friday, May 26, 2006 10:37 PM CDT

Dear Zach, I know that Cookie sang for you yesterday. I read a quote in her son's room one time. It said, "On the day you were born, you cried and the world laughed. Live so that on the day you die, you laugh and the world cries." Congratulations on fulfilling this instruction. There are many tears being shed here for our loss. But I can hear your laughter from heaven. And I can hear my Kevin cheering that he finally has a teenage boy to do things with. And my Greg will introduce you to 'hot girls' in heaven. And look for my mom. She was the best baker in the world, and I'm sure she is now the best baker in heaven. And while you're thinking about it, tell Jesus that we all appreciate the gift he gave us in you. Have fun. We'll see you when we get there.
Kathy Whais <kathywhais@yahoo.com>
Pekin, IL - Friday, May 26, 2006 9:57 PM CDT

Zach is a true hero. What an Angel Heaven has inherited! He will be with all of you, looking down and guiding you. We are so sorry for your loss. May the Lord take you in His arms and grant you His peace.

All our love

Roy, Julie and Maddie
Julie Singley <rjms99@insightbb.com>
Green Valley, IL 61534 - Friday, May 26, 2006 9:37 PM CDT

Our Cancer Warrior Angel Theresa told us about Zach. I am amazed at how hard he fought for so long against this horrible cancer beast. I know he is at last at peace but that your hearts are breaking all the same.

We will keep your family in our thoughts and prayers.

With love,
Katie, mom to Hayley, Hunter, and Taylor <dugan2b@yahoo.com>
Franklin, MA - Friday, May 26, 2006 9:37 PM CDT

I stumbled upon your site several months ago and have been amazed by the amazing strength you and Zach have shown. Your beautifuly son battled this monster with so much faith and courage. My family's prayers and thoughts to you and your family.
Paula Bachmeier <paulabachmeier@hotmail.com. www.caringbridge.org/nd/christopherbachmeier>
Burlington, ND - Friday, May 26, 2006 9:32 PM CDT

Hi Nikki. You've been on my mind all day. I am so sad. Zach will be greatly missed. He isn't hurting any more though. I love you. Thanks for being a great friend throughout the years. I'll always be here for you. I'll never forgot the day you called me to tell me the news that Zach had cancer. I'm thankful that you were able to spend as much time with him as you did, but it still is so hard to accept that he's gone...and now in heaven. Oh I'm so sorry Nik. Hug Kylee for me....and John too. I'll call on Saturday.
Gina <gbooth@insightbb.com>
Groveland, IL - Friday, May 26, 2006 9:26 PM CDT

Nikki,

As a mom, I am hurting with you. What a special MOM you are to have been blessed with Zach. GOD's plan is perfect, even if we don't understand it. Hug John and Kylee for us and have them hug you back.
Lots of love,
Phyllis
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Friday, May 26, 2006 9:11 PM CDT

Nikki...
I honestly don't know what to say. It was an honor to know Zachary and he will be loved and missed by all.. You all are in my daily thoughts and prayers!!
Sending love and prayers your way,
Alyssa
Alyssa Lewellen <ABallerina5678@sbcglobal.net>
East Peoria, IL USA - Friday, May 26, 2006 8:54 PM CDT

What a blessing it has been to get to "know" your family through your site over the last couple of months! What a blessing it was to hear of all the people that Zach touched with his life! I think it is so neat how he told you specific kids that he needed to see before he died...what a heart that was sensitive to God's voice! At such a young age! I shared his story with my own children and they were so impressed by his need to let others know about God's love! And once he felt that his "job" here was done- he moved on to his eternal home!!! I personally can't wait to meet Zach when I get there! I am going to seek him out and let him know that we prayed for him and loved him during his last days here on earth! We will continue to pray for all of you as you go through these difficult days ahead. Love~ Kate Hebb
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Friday, May 26, 2006 8:43 PM CDT

I am so sorry for your loss. You will be in my thoughts & prayers. Fly free sweet Zachary.
Michele
NY - Friday, May 26, 2006 8:39 PM CDT

I am so sorry for your loss. I have followed your amazing Zachary's story for some time now and was always amazed at what a wonderful young man you raised!! I am glad he went peacefully and is now able to run free!!
We will pray for your comfort during this difficult time!!
You should be proud of your son. He sounded like a great, selfless kid!!
Heather Black and NICHOLAS (Neuroblastoma NED since 5/04 <heatherblack99@yahoo.com>
Bolivia, nc - Friday, May 26, 2006 8:06 PM CDT

My sweet Nikki, John & Kylee,
My heart is broken for you. I can't even begin to imagine the grief. I can rejoice for Zach, he is singing with JESUS now. It is an awesome testimony that Zach knew when he was helping people. What a special man he was. GOD knew what he was doing giving that little man such a special family. Please know that we are praying for all of you.

We Love you,
Phyllis
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Friday, May 26, 2006 7:00 PM CDT

I am so sorry for your loss. I have followed Zach's story for several years now but haven't posted a lot. As the song goes..."we can only imagine". God bless all of you - what amazing strength you have as a mother - you are inspiration. And Zach sounds like an AWESOME kid...I will pray for you.
Missy <rshort@clevelandcountyschools.org>
Shelby, NC 28150 - Friday, May 26, 2006 6:57 PM CDT

Kylee, Nikki and John, What a day you all have had. I can't imagine losing a child. I know we are all gifts from God, and what a special gift Zach was, and that he will call us when he says its time. I know Zach's journey to heaven must have been awesome! It must be so peaceful knowing he loved you all and he knew where he was going, thanks to GSLS and yourselves. I never really have thought until now how greatfull I am for sending Micaylan to GSLS. They teach them God's word in ways I could never do and they totally believe in their awesome GOD! Zach had that instilled in his heart and that's why he left sleeping with the angels guiding him toward the light. If any of the readers on this site read this, let Zach be your guide to faith in the Lord Jesus! He was a real testiment of what a school like GSLS and a Great MOM can do! Rejoice for Zach and Pray for Kylee, Nikki, John and family.
Wendy McDonald <wmcdonald@grics.net>
Pekin, IL - Friday, May 26, 2006 6:51 PM CDT

Nikki,
i'm so sorry honey,i'm just heartbroken but at the sametime at peace knowing he isn't hurting anymore and that he's again safe in the arms of our merciful Lord.I love Zach with all my heart and can't tell you how sad and tearful i feel now knowing he's gone from this earth and your loving arms,i'll NEVER forget him and will always come here to leave him messages as i have been doing and to check on you,John and Kylee.
Kylee,
sweetheart i can't imagine how much it hurts for you right now but Zach loves you and will always be your big brother,forever by your side for you to talk to,close your eyes and think of him being next to you whenever you need him and he'll be there to comfort you always.
Zach,
so brave,strong and wise to the last moment,you may only have been 13 here on earth but you were much older in that heart of yours,i will always be in awe of the love and compassion you've shown all those around you and will forever miss seeing you grow into the amazing man you were becoming.Forever our special warrior,
With tears,love and prayer,
Theresa
Executive Director
Cancer Warriors Angel Network
www.cancerwarriors.org
Theresa Heath <theresa@cancerwarriors.org>
Rowlett, Tx - Friday, May 26, 2006 6:31 PM CDT

Fly high, Angel. You were such a gift to this earth.
gretchen <gsknuffke@msn.com>
benicia, ca - Friday, May 26, 2006 6:24 PM CDT

Nikki, Kaylee, John: sending you much love and strength for the days ahead. So grateful Zach was able to accomplish what he needed to on this earth, though of course he will continue to touch so many forever.
Many blessings to you all,
Jennifer Click and Carolyn & Evan Coveney <jclick@mindspring.com>
Falls Church, VA - Friday, May 26, 2006 6:24 PM CDT

Our thoughts and prayers are with you all. Please let your Kylee know that my Kylee is thinking of her.
Rick. Lisa and Kylee Alexander <prilo1@yahoo.com>
Pekin, Il USA - Friday, May 26, 2006 6:21 PM CDT

Nikki John and Kaylee Our Hearts Go Out to Your Family Your In Our Prayers

Andy, Melissa, Jayla & Jacob Rasmussen <amrasmussen@insightbb.com>
North Pekin , IL - Friday, May 26, 2006 6:16 PM CDT

To Zachary's family...I just read a post on Christi Thomas' site asking everyone to pray for Zachary on his journey. As this begins the phase of a "new normal", please know that even strangers are holding you close and lifting you up. much love, sylvia

Sylvia Pituch <smp75@msn.com>
Allentown , PA - Friday, May 26, 2006 3:47 PM CDT

Nikki,
Aunt Diane just called and gave me the news. I'm so sorry, but you know that Zach is in a better place now. I do know from experience that doesn't help the hurt, numbness and the empty feeling go away. It's only been 7 weeks since Anthony went to heaven and I cry every day. I still feel very empty and at times get very angry that everyone elses lives keep going while ours is standing still. Zach was a great fighter and I know that you are so proud of him. Losing a child is the worse thing that can ever happen to someone and you can't even begin to explain the hurt or all the emotions you feel today and forever. I do want you to know that I love you very much and will continue to pray for your strength through this. Remember, YOU DO NOT NEED TO BE STRONG FOR EVERYONE ELSE, take care of you, Kaylee and John!!! If you need to talk, please call. I do understand! Love you all very much.
Robin Ford
Mankato, MN USA - Friday, May 26, 2006 2:16 PM CDT

My thoughts and prayers continue to be with your Zachary for a peaceful journey to Jesus. I pray for your daughter Kylee as she is going through this. I lost my brother this winter in car accident(not his fault). Keith was 47 but it is still painful to lose a sibling so my heart goes out to her. Cherish the many wonderful memories you have of Zachary even in these difficult days there are memories to be made. It sounds like he still wants to make everyone smile & that is something cancer can never take from any of you. God Bless your Family, Jan Karels
Jan Karels <jgkarels@cgintl.com>
mankato, mn - Friday, May 26, 2006 1:55 PM CDT

Time for bed Sweet Zachary - I hope you are peaceful and able to finish all that you want to. I'll check back here first thing in the morning. Special thoughts to Kylee and Kris - Awesome friends and family.
Lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
UK - Friday, May 26, 2006 1:19 PM CDT

PRAYERS for your Zachary!!! I wish I could make it all go away for you and your sweet guy!!!! Words just aren't enough but my prayers stay with you.
Kellie <kelliekea@hotmail.com>
Tyler , Tx USA - Friday, May 26, 2006 12:40 AM CDT

Hey there guys it's Marilyn just wanted to stop by and let you know I am currently in Memphis(the dreaded Memphis). In case you haven't heard my nephew was just diagnosed with Neuroblastoma on Tuesday at St. Francis we drove straight down here and now we are in the waiting game his name is Dalton Blakley he is 12 years old. Pretty amazing huh how this UGLY UGLY cancer keep coming around me. I will update you guys soon and home to on my way home tomorrow. Just know my heart and head and most of all PRAYERS are with ALL of you. Give Zach a HUGE hug and kiss from me and let him know Aaron is watching over him. Also tell Kylee Antavious says hi!!!!! Nikki and John stay strong I know thats easier said than done but you to have GREAT AWESOME shoulders to lean on and may many prayers going up for ALL of you well computer here at the hospital is gonna time out so I will talk to you all soon.
Love, Hugs, and Kisses and MANY MANY Prayers, Marilyn <www.caringbridge.org/il/aarondhunter or stjudemomma74@aol.com>
Peoria, IL USA - Friday, May 26, 2006 10:21 AM CDT

Zach, you are an amazing young man - God is smiling down on you - I hope your pain is better and you are feeling some peace - I am in awe of your determination and drive to stay the course until you know the work God has for you is completed - There are many angels surrounding you - one is named Jessica - call her name, she will answer, she will give you comfort and care - You have taught me so much, Zach. Your mom loves you so much! Your reward for all your hard work and battles will be so great!
Mary
St. Louis, MO - Friday, May 26, 2006 8:18 AM CDT

Hi! I am awed by you Zack. God is using you. Romans 8:28 is a promise. Thank you for being such a great example. To God be all the glory. He is good.

Jenny Otte <Yippiehoo@seehearworks.com>
East Peoria, IL USA - Friday, May 26, 2006 8:16 AM CDT

Good morning guys,
just wanted to stop by and say hello and make sure you know how loved you are and that i'm thinking of you.
Theresa
Executive Director
Cancer Warriors Angel Network
www.cancerwarriors.org
Theresa Heath <theresa@cancerwarriors.org>
Rowlett, Tx - Friday, May 26, 2006 7:41 AM CDT

Just checking in on you... I hope everything is ok and that Zach's pain is under control! We are contniuing to pray for all of you! remember to tell Kylee that we are really keepin her in our prayers too! She is beautiful... Well- we'll keep checking in and more importantly- PRAY! Take care~ Kate Hebb
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Friday, May 26, 2006 6:45 AM CDT

Good morning Zachary. Love and prayers for you today and always.
Lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
England - Friday, May 26, 2006 4:05 AM CDT

Hi Zachary and family!
Sorry that I have not signed in a while, or maybe not ever? Anyway, I've been reading Zach's beautiful story for months now and he is soo inspiring. Your love for him is amazing as with his will to live and cherish each day. It truly is unbelievable. Our prayers are with you.
www.caringbridge.org/visit/julie
Caitlin
London, ON Canada - Thursday, May 25, 2006 9:48 PM CDT

Just stopping by to say hello and send you love buddy.

You're in my thoughts and prayers
love you,
Theresa
Executive Director
Cancer Warriors Angel Network
Theresa Heath <theresa@cancerwarriors.org>
Rowlett, Tx - Thursday, May 25, 2006 9:22 PM CDT

Nikki: Supporting you with all I have. Hope you had a good night last night Zach. Still praying for healing. It can still happen. My prayer is that God would send his angels to your room, too many to count to bless you and comfort you and give you peace. God is the great physician despite what the doctors say at the hospital.He can heal all diseases. Believe,believe, believe. Love you.
Debbie LeBlanc <DebiRLeBlanc@aol.com>
Breaux Bridge, LA USA - Thursday, May 25, 2006 1:20 PM CDT

Hey Guys,
Sounds like everything is going ok. Im doing ok. Im glad Zach got to finish his video game. And that his pain is getting under control. Too bad that means a trip to the hospital though.
Im thinking and praying for you daily!
Love,
Chass
chass <xochassxo@aol.com>
- Thursday, May 25, 2006 12:30 AM CDT

To Gorgeous and your family, Take care. We love you. Maryann told me that you are not well today. The world is blessed. We have had that beautiful smile lighting up our corner of the world; share that light with the rest of the world. There are some dark souls out there who need to be lit up. I know you will be busy doing that. Thank you for loving us. And don't worry. Ask for Jo Murray and Kevin Miles and Greg Whais when you get to your new home. They will be a the best grandma, dad, and brother a kid can ask for. Prepare for them to spoil you. Nikki, they'll take good care of him.We pray for you and we share your tears. Thank God, Zach gave us lots to laugh about, too.
Kathy Whais <kathwhais@yahoo.com>
Pekin, IL - Thursday, May 25, 2006 10:58 AM CDT

Zach & Family,
Was good to see you this past Sunday. Zach, I know you are fighting as hard as you can. You have more strenght and will than 100 men. Zach you are a vary amazing young MAN, and you are loved by so many. You are in our thoughts and prayers 24/7. We think about you and all of your family daily. God blesses you and holds you in his grace.
Barbara Richardson <roy12448@sbcglobal.net>
Canton, IL USA - Thursday, May 25, 2006 9:45 AM CDT

Hi Everyone - another day is upon us and I pray its a comfortable one for you all. Love and prayers to you Zachary - you're always in my thoughts and prayers.
Lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
UK - Thursday, May 25, 2006 3:09 AM CDT

Nikki,
Sometimes the hospital is the best place to be. I understand that comepletely... Your family is in my thoughts and prayers!! Tell Zach I said "HI! and that I love him!!"
God Bless!!
Alyssa Lewellen
Alyssa Lewellen <Aballerina5678@sbcglobal.net>
East Peoria, IL USA - Wednesday, May 24, 2006 10:14 PM CDT

Dear Nikki and Family -

You are not alone. Bless you. I pray for Zach's comfort and for you all.

Love Hope Peace & Grace for Eternity,

Colleen

Colleen M. Kashino <cmkashino@adelphia.net>
- Wednesday, May 24, 2006 9:04 PM CDT

Praying for a restful night. I have been praying for Zach's comfort and everybody else's strength. I pray GOD's grace for all of you. Your are on my heart and mind constantly.

Love in CHRIST,
Phyllis
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Wednesday, May 24, 2006 8:27 PM CDT

Nikki and Zach,
Just letting you know that I am holding you up in prayer. I read a saying on a church sign Monday that I think applies to your family: "People see what we do. God sees why we do them."
May you all have peace and comfort.

DONNA WELLS - friend to Jacob and Jen <gwells@ntelos.net>
Staunton, VA - Wednesday, May 24, 2006 6:47 PM CDT

Wow...sure did think of you a lot today. Hope you had a good day. Our thoughts and prayers are with you...
Heather Wilds <wilds6@cox.net>
Newport News, VA USA - Wednesday, May 24, 2006 3:25 PM CDT

What an amazing boy you are and what an amazing family you have. You are all in my thoughts and prayers. Zach.....please say hello to Brad for us when you get to Jesus's house! Melissa (aunt of Brad Wallin)
Melissa
Kirksville, MO - Wednesday, May 24, 2006 1:08 PM CDT

Coming from another CB site - you are all in my prayers - you are very blessed to have such a wonderful son and angel in your presence - I just wanted you to know that I am praying for strength and peace for all of you - and...Zach, you are an amazing young man, the world needs so many more just like you - your Mom is doing a great job and it touched my heart when she wrote - "I told him I loved him with my whole heart and he said he knew that." What a gift you have given each other - not many people know what if feels like to know someone COMPLETELY loves you and that you COMPLETELY love them back - thank you for that message -you are blessed by God and there are so many Caringbridge Angels by your side right now to give you support and comfort and hold you gently through this time. Peace and strength and God's love to all of you. I am praying.
Mary H
St. Louis, MO - Wednesday, May 24, 2006 10:22 AM CDT

Zach, Sorry to see you had to go back to the hospital last night. I pray they were able to give you comfort and rest that you so deserve. Micaylan & I are praying for all of you and hope Kylee is doing ok, under the circumstances. I talked to Alexa's mom & I was glad to see they got Kylee out to play for a while, sounds like she has a very nice time. We'd like to do something for Kylee also, when the time is right. God be with you all today and let the angels work their magic too! God bless, Wendy and Micaylan
Micaylan McDonald <wmcdonald@grics.net>
Pekin, il usa - Wednesday, May 24, 2006 7:59 AM CDT

We are praying- HARD all day! Lord- Please be with this family- give them all comfort in kowing you and help Zachary as he goes through this time! Thank-you for his heart that loves you and help ease his pain! We will continue to check in and PRAY! Take care~ Kate Hebb
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Wednesday, May 24, 2006 6:25 AM CDT

Hello Zachary - I've discovered I can type and pray at the same time - hows that for multitasking! My prayers are for pain free times Zach. You're so brave, just praying for you all the time. Hope the hospital can achieve some pain relief for you.
Lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
UK - Wednesday, May 24, 2006 2:26 AM CDT

Sweet,beautiful Zach,
remember how much we all love you and how many prayers are being said for you all.
You are in my thoughts every moment,
Theresa
Executive Director
Cancer Warriors Angel Network
Theresa Heath <theresa@cancerwarriors.org>
Rowlett, Tx - Tuesday, May 23, 2006 10:03 PM CDT

Hi Nikki & Zach!!
I wanted to let you know that our hearts are breaking for you ALL, because of everything that you've endured and are still enduring. We hope that the hospital can help to get you comfortable Zach. Nikki, there just aren't words to express to you just how very touched we are EVERY time we read your journal entries. I said it before...that it is so true that Zach has the Greatest Mom in the whole world! We have all been blessed to have gotten to meet Zach...and his wonderful family also.
Love to you all...we will continue to pray for you daily.
Kris's "Aunt Marcy & Uncle Brian"
Marcy & Brian Wilson <mbmwilson@sbcglobal.net>
Peoria, IL US - Tuesday, May 23, 2006 9:19 PM CDT

I found your site through Jake Rayborn's site. I shared this song with the Rayborn's and think that it is appropriate for you too. Our God is faithful and true!

"Your ways are higher than our ways
And plans that You have laid
Are good and true
If You call us to the fire
You will not withdraw Your hand
We'll gaze into the flames and look for You."

Lissa <munn@opsb.net>
West Monroe, LA - Tuesday, May 23, 2006 8:39 PM CDT

We continue to pray for Zachary and all of you!!
Heather Black and NICHOLAS (Neuroblastoma NED since 5/04 <heatherblack99@yahoo.com>
Bolivia, nc - Tuesday, May 23, 2006 8:34 PM CDT

Nikki and Zach,
We love you! God will help you through. If you just need someone to cry with, I'm a phone call away! Sending lots of love and prayers for peace and understanding your way.
Robin Ford
Mankato, MN USA - Tuesday, May 23, 2006 6:38 PM CDT

Nikki: God is in control. He will have the victory. Stand on the Promises of God. Keep the faith. I am praying for peace and comfort for you. Praying for healing. God is in the miracle business.
Zach: Be strong and be brave.
Debbie LeBlanc <DebiRLeBlanc@aol.com>
Breaux Bridge, LA USA - Tuesday, May 23, 2006 6:01 PM CDT

I have been following Zach's story for a while now and just wanted to send a note letting you know that the prayers are flowing your way. May god grant Zach the comfort and some peaceful rest he's not had today. My prayers for with your whole family.
Kelly Ellsworth
Byron, MI USA - Tuesday, May 23, 2006 5:44 PM CDT

Hey guys,
I am so grateful for the rest you received. What awesome friends and family you have. Everyone needs friends like Zach, Kris and Chad. How special that friendship is. I hope you have another good day. Give Zach, John & Kylee lots of hugs. Please let Kylee and John know that we have not forgotten about them. We are praying just as hard for them as we are you and Zach.

Love in CHRIST,
Phyllis
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Tuesday, May 23, 2006 2:15 PM CDT

Good Evening Zachary - time for me to log off for the night again. I pray you are peaceful and are surrounded by the people that mean the most to you. You are part of an amazing family and nothing is so special as family. Love and prayers for you all and a hug all the way from England for Kylee.
Lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
England - Tuesday, May 23, 2006 1:42 PM CDT

Good Morning Zachary - I pray you had...or are having a good nights rest, I think with the time difference its still the middle of the night where you are :). I pray for love and strength for you whole family today, and your special friend Kris. Love and peace.
Lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
UK - Tuesday, May 23, 2006 2:59 AM CDT

Zach~ You are such an amazing testimony of God's love and Nikki~ You are such an amazing inspiration to me as a mom! I have such a greater appreciation for the small things in life as I read your journal daily! Your relationship with your son is so special and every mother should strive to have what you two do! I get up every day now and ask God to show himself to you and all the other moms going through the same thing as you are in a new and special way! I know that He carries us through times like these- when my youngest was born we didn't think she was going to make it and after two months at CHOP in Philadelphia- I realized that He kind of had me in a fog and literally carried me through without too much emotion but I knew He was in control and that He had a plan that we could not see all at once - it was revealed in HIS time- not our's. I just pray that He will keep Zach comfortable and that you will feel HIS peace. And- as a mom of a PS2 junkie- I pray that he gets through Kingdom Hearts 2!!! That is BIG!!! I also have really been praying for Kylee! I have two daughters and a son and it must be so hard for her to go through this! Hold tight to her and let her know that the Hebb family is taking her "under our wing" during this time! Let he know that we have a love for her that is hard to understand- never meeting all of you. I think God gives us burdens for certain people and we need to take it seriously! He has really placed her on my heart and we will continue to pray daily!!! Hang in there and know that you are be lifted by many prayer warriors while you are trying to get through these long days! That what we are here for! To lift eachother up! Take care~ Kate Hebb and family
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Monday, May 22, 2006 8:39 PM CDT

Hello Nikki and Zach, The strenghth and love you both show is so wonderful. You have taught many people such wonders in this life that we live. Even the most saddest times you find the most happiest memories. Chassity asks everyday how Zach is doing. She really admires him so much. She worries about Kylee too. Tell her we are thinking of her too. You are always in our prayers and thoughts.
Much Love, Carrie and Chassity
Carrie <flintcx4@yahoo.com>
The Plains, Va - Monday, May 22, 2006 7:30 PM CDT

Hey Zach! Congrats on your 8th Grade Graduation!! Wow, that is awesome. We are very proud of you, Zach!! You keep letting your light shine for Jesus and you are a blessing to us all. May our Lord continue to surround you with His love and peace that passes understanding. We lift you up to Him in prayer. Hi to your Mom, Dad and Kylee. Love, Diane
Diane Sickles <gsickles@peoplepc.com>
Canton, IL USA - Monday, May 22, 2006 7:28 PM CDT

Hey there, cool dude. So you're home. Pretty awesome place to be. Mama talks about holding your hand....well, if every time I thought about you today, and told Jesus how jealous I am that He knows you better than any of us do, had been a hand to hold, you would need to be an octopus to have enough hands to hold mine. In other words....thought about you lots today...chatted with Jesus....and told Him that He did a good thing letting us all have you. You are the firework that makes me ooohhhhh and aaahhhh when I look up. Thanks for showing me how to look up and enjoy the scenery.
Kathy Whais, Maryann Vaupel's DON <kathywhais @yahoo.com>
Pekin, IL USA - Monday, May 22, 2006 6:30 PM CDT

Wow, Zach, you are an awesome young man. What a special guy! I know your mom is ssssoooooooooo proud of you. Please know that I am praying for you.
Connie Powell
West Monroe, LA - Monday, May 22, 2006 2:32 PM CDT

Good evening Zachary - I pray you are peaceful and pain free and have found peace of mind to carry you along. I think the person who posted all the things you have taught her may have started something big...this could end up a VERY long list if we all added our own thoughts. I would like to add...Zachary has taught me to love the moment, Zachary has taught me its good to say you're a Believer, and Zachary has taught me humility...not bad considering we've never met eh Zachary - you're some teacher!!! :) Love and prayers for you all, and thanks to God for another earthly day - I hope it was a good, peaceful one. I'll check on your site first thing in the morning - its night time in rainy England. God Bless.
Lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
England - Monday, May 22, 2006 2:01 PM CDT

Nikki and Zach, I had this running through my head for the past few days. I think that everyone who posts messages could add to this list. I have many more I could list, but this is just for starters:

LESSONS ZACHARY HAS TAUGHT ME:

1. Tell my children that I love them each and every day - not just once, but throughout the day. They can never hear it too much.
2. Kiss and hug them as much as they will tolerate!
3. Don't sweat the small stuff! Let little things go and concentrate on what matters. (Example: How many times do we tell kids to take out the garbage... thats small stuff!)
4. See my children as a blessing!
5. Speak freely of my faith in Christ to them, so they will speak of it to me and others.
6. Marvel at their growth, individual creativity and especially at the unique way they view the world!
7. Laugh when they laugh, and watch their eyes sparkle!
8. Every friend is a treasure: Be the kind of friend you would like to have.
9. Relish every kiss and hug like it was the last one we might ever receive.

Thank you, Zachary, for making me appreciate what I have in a much deeper way!
I always knew what I have, but after knowing you, I appreciate it more deeply, and love more fiercely. You are in my prayers throughout the day! Love, Mary Ann Vaupel
Mary Ann Vaupel (mom to the Teen Wonder's best bud) <madk84@grics.net>
Pekin, IL - Monday, May 22, 2006 12:48 AM CDT

Hello Zach and family-
I am not sure I would be able to pick any of you out in a crowd, but thought of all of you yesterday as I graduated from college. All of my experiences and moral lessons I have learned through 18 years of school help me realize what it takes to cherish friends and family. However, your family lives it everyday. You are the meaning of love, faith and family. With every breath Zach takes, you all have no question what your role is and has been for him and this journey. Thoughts and Prayers.
Sara B <Urawesome6939@yahoo.com>
Madison, WI - Monday, May 22, 2006 12:28 AM CDT

I am just amazed by your strength, courage, determination and the presence of God. Zach is doing God's work...if you can't believe after hearing this story than you never will. We continue to pray for you.
Heather Wilds <wilds6@cox.net>
Newport News, VA - Monday, May 22, 2006 12:19 AM CDT

hey sis boy there are some amazing, nice, and encouriging people in the world!! that lisa from england an pyllis the send love and prayers and encouriging words everyday. you guys are wonderful. i tear up on all your entries. i love u guys and im just still believing!! my nephew my HERO i love him sooooo much!!! its just such an emotional time!!! i LOVE u guys and im so bleessed to have such an amazing BIG sister!!im so glad to have u to look up to for a big sis.
aunt mandi <justus3deakins@sbcglobal.net>
- Monday, May 22, 2006 9:50 AM CDT

I always tear up when reading your entries. Especially when you say things about how you tell Zachary you love him "with your whole heart" and he says "I know mom." How comforting for you that must be. He knows how much you love him and how strong you have been and continue to be. So much wisdom for someone so young. May God bless you all and hold you tightly in His arms. Praying for peace.
Channa <newman959@aol.com>
Louisville, KY US - Monday, May 22, 2006 6:39 AM CDT

Good morning Zachary. I hope you are peaceful and pain free. That is my prayer for you. Hello Kylee, you're an incredible sister - stay strong. Nikki and John my prayers for you are for strength, love and understanding. And Kris - BestBuds are so important - YOU are so important in this journey that Zach is making. Love and prayers for you all.
Lisa Burt <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
England - Monday, May 22, 2006 2:41 AM CDT

We are praying hard for GOD's peace and especially HIS rest. I pray that you feel HIS presence constantly.

Love in CHRIST,
Phyllis
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Sunday, May 21, 2006 10:09 PM CDT

Please know that I am Praying for you Zachary. I am asking the Lord to send his Angels to be with you at all times, May the Angels hold your hands and also your Mommys Hands and bring her peace and happiness even while her heart is so broken with the pain to see you suffering but please know that soon you will have no pain and no more Cancer. only Joy..... streets of Gold you will walk there will be no more tears.
Daisy Peralta <daisyperalta27@aol.com>
New York , NY USA - Sunday, May 21, 2006 9:54 PM CDT

Zach-
CONGRATS on your graduation. Hope you had fun!!! I thought I would write you and your family to let you know I am thinking of you!! Take care!!!
Love, Allison <akpaul05@yahoo.com>
Bloomington, IL USA - Sunday, May 21, 2006 9:33 PM CDT

Hi Zach. Im sorry i couldnt make it on friday...i was in chicago for the state track meet. I thought about you alot. I am praying for you.

love,
Kaitlyn
Kaitlyn Gudzinskas
Pekin, IL - Sunday, May 21, 2006 2:07 PM CDT

Nikki you're so good to give us updates - it means a lot. Love and prayers for you all. What an incredible friend Kris is. Hope his confirmation was amazing. Zach - breathe deep my friend peace must surely be yours soon.
Lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
England - Sunday, May 21, 2006 1:02 PM CDT

Good morning Zach and all your wonderful family. It's raining hard here in England this morning. Keeping you in my prayers, and including Kris too. Best Buds have a hard time seeing their friends suffer. Love to you all.
Lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
UK - Sunday, May 21, 2006 3:25 AM CDT

Hey Zach:

I'm sorry I couldn't make it to your graduation party----I was at the state track meet. I was thinking of you last night though and I was wishing you my best.
Hollie LandiVittori <liamsflowerchild21@yahoo.com>
North Pekin, - Saturday, May 20, 2006 9:33 PM CDT

Zac,

You are so very brave. We are deeply moved by your story and the courage and dignity of your fight against this horrible cancer.

Even in your deepest suffering, you think of others and try to ease their pain.

You really are a teen wonder!!

Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family,

Toni, Paul and Katharine xx
Katharine Beck <O.C.Queen@hotmail.co.uk>
St Albans, England - Saturday, May 20, 2006 2:29 PM CDT

Goodnight Sweet Zach - time to go to bed (in England). I'll check you site first thing in the morning. Love to you all and a special hug for Kylee.
Lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
UK - Saturday, May 20, 2006 1:38 PM CDT

CONGRATULATONS ON YOUR 8TH GRADE GRADUATION!!!

Roy is on the school board and how we wish we could have been there to celebrate with you, but we weren�t home until late last night. Thought and prayed for you often during our trip to WDW.

We are glad you are home and pray for comfort. Zach, what a testimony of faith that you are to God. Nikki, John, and Kylee you are all in our prayers. Let our Heavenly Father wrap His arms of loving grace around you and hold you. Find His peace.

All our love, Roy, Julie, and Maddie

Julie Singley <rjms99@insightbb.com>
Green Valley, IL USA - Saturday, May 20, 2006 9:55 AM CDT

Oh Nikki, I just do not have the words to say (write), and God knows I have never been short of words in my life. I just keep waiting for him to take this from Zach in an instant espcially with the manner in which he is hanging on here. Also so thrilled to hear about the graduation party and family gathering for Zach, he is such a gift to you and your family. I just want to stand over Zach and demand that he be healed in Jesus name. May we continue to lift up Zach's family in Jesus name, please Lord help little Kaylee through this time give her your sign and carry her in comfort as you would Zach Nikki and family. Give them strength and healing in Jesus name!!!!

Mina and kids along with Angel Joey.
Mina <maddiemae414@yahoo.com>
mi - Saturday, May 20, 2006 9:29 AM CDT

Oh Zach - you're home? That's incredible. And HUGE congratulations on graduating - can't wait to see the photos. You know Zach you inspire me so much every time I come to your moms journal - what a wonderful family you have. I know this must be such a terribly hard time for you all but you know you are truly a man of God and I'm positive God is looking down on you and is mightily proud of the young man you've become. I bet if Heaven truly does have gates he's going to welcome you inside himself! :) Love to you Zach and special prayers for your parents and lovely sister. Every breath you take is an inspriation Zach. Love and Peace
Lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
England - Saturday, May 20, 2006 8:57 AM CDT

We wanted to let you know we love you so very much.

Zach, we got a kick out of your mom's story about your naked butt dance! It is so like you to dance even when you're in pain, and what a tremendous lesson for the rest of us. Jacob also thought it was funny because ... well, he's a 10 year old boy! :)

Love,
Jen, Jacob, Keith, Angel
www.caringbridge.com/va/jacob_bollinger <kjenwhit@verizon.net>
Staunton, VA - Saturday, May 20, 2006 6:58 AM CDT

Hello All - Hi Zach. Praying for you all the time. Praying for the pain to stop. I pray it has and you are able to find some peace on this earth before your final journey. You're amazing Zach, every single day you're amazing.
Lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
England - Saturday, May 20, 2006 2:50 AM CDT

Dear Nikki, Zach, Kylee and John, Just wanted to say hi and our prayers are with you all. Micaylan and I and the Singley's just got back from WDW and we wanted you to know we thought of you often. We made phone calls back home to Debbie B. , the school and a friend that could pull up this site to look and hear updates. Sorry to hear you're in the hospital and suffering sooo much. Why this is true I don't know but if there was a way we all that care could take the pain from you, WE WOULD! Just a little story about WDW-We were standing in line at the River Rapids @ Animal Kingdom and we had a group of kids UNATTENDED by their parents waiting in front of us. There was a sister & brother picking on each other about the same ages you and Kylee are, and it was getting out of hand big time! I told Julie I would love to tell them they should feel very lucky to be where they are and love & respect each other "cause there is a boy and sis back home who would love to be in their shoes not going thru what they are! Some parents just don't get how to raise kids with Jesus in their hearts. You've all done a wonderful job knowing the love of Jesus and what's to come in our lives as we leave this earth! God bless you all, Wendy & Micaylan
Micaylan McDonald <wmcdonald@grics.net>
Pekin, il 61554 - Friday, May 19, 2006 8:40 PM CDT

Nikki,
I have been thinking of you and praying for you all week,
that God would grant you strength and peace, and be close to Zach. There are so many prayers going up for you all over the world; I hope that you can feel His arms around you.
In Christ,
Lori and Joshi Schwichtenberg
WI USA - Friday, May 19, 2006 2:58 PM CDT

Dear Nikki,

Just stopping by to let you know that I was thinking of you and your baby today.

With Love,

Colleen Kashino

Colleen M. Kashino
- Friday, May 19, 2006 6:39 AM CDT

Good Morning,
We are praying GOD's peace and comfort for you today. Draw from HIS strength. Rest in HIS loving arms.

Love in CHRIST,
Phyllis
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Friday, May 19, 2006 6:32 AM CDT

Hi All - I couldn't get onto Caringbridge at all yesterday so just kept you in my prayers. Love to you all.
Lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
UK - Friday, May 19, 2006 3:06 AM CDT

hey zach...remember me?? our computer has been down for over 2 months & we have been out of contact with everyone!! we love you SOOOOOOO much, don't ever forget that! you are so amazing & so very brave! kayla wanted to do the Run for you this year, but she is too young- next year!!! we are praying for you & thinking of you always!! love, kim kayla nick &mason
kim meints <meints5@msn.com>
pekin, il usa - Thursday, May 18, 2006 10:05 PM CDT

You and your family are in my thoughts. May God give you the strength to make the decisions you need to make. Giving up Zach's fight is not giving up, it's sending him to heaven which is the best gift you can give him. May God Bless you!

Molly
Mankato, MN - Thursday, May 18, 2006 4:56 PM CDT

What a special guy!!! To be going through this and still have the sense of humor that he has! We are praying for his comfort and peace and yours as well! Those kind of decisions are not something any mom can imagine having to make! We will keep the prayers coming... In Him~ Kate Hebb and family
Kate hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Thursday, May 18, 2006 6:34 AM CDT

Zack and family...This update brought tears to my eyes and then a smile to my face...I bet that was just the cutest little shake :o)
My thoughts and prayers are with you..May God bless your wonderful family..
Liz
New Iberia, La - Wednesday, May 17, 2006 10:47 PM CDT

Nikki and Zach our prayers are with you and your family.
Selburg Family
Pekin , IL USA - Wednesday, May 17, 2006 9:06 PM CDT

Nikki, Gary and I are so sorry that Zach has to suffer so much. We can't imagine the pain you are going through. I truely believe that there is only one set of foot prints in the sand now. God is carrying you both. We love you all and wish we could just give you a hug. Love, Gary and Tammy
Tammy Schoenfeldt <gtschoenfeldt@aol.com >
Warner Robins, GA - Wednesday, May 17, 2006 6:14 PM CDT

Dear, dear Zach - there are no answers as to why some have to suffer so much. May you be well. May you be happy. May you be filled with peace. It is great to know that you still have a silly and wonderful sense of humour. I remember when my own two sons, one of whom I lost nine years ago this week, were your age, and I have to smile at the memory of their antics. Love to you and your family.
Ruth <copacetic@sympatico.ca>
- Wednesday, May 17, 2006 4:05 PM CDT

Today we said goodbye to an elderly relative - during the service we were invited to pray. I prayed for Zach and all the caringbridge children whose stories I have followed. Our Peter was old, his life on earth was over but these children...why God, why the children? Praying for peace for you all through this nightmare that you travel. God bless Zach for just being him, exactly as he is. Couragous, funny, inspirational and unique.
Lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
England - Wednesday, May 17, 2006 2:56 PM CDT

Nikki,
I cannot imagine how you have the strength to be so strong except through God's mercy. Enjoy these butt-shaking moments, and cherish every breath. I am praying for you and for Zach and the rest of those who love him. May God give you precious peace, and Zach happiness and healing.

Josh's mom
Eau Claire, WI USA - Wednesday, May 17, 2006 1:39 PM CDT

Still here and praying for you. I am so impressed with your whole story that I think, Nikki, you could write a fantastic best selling book on Zach's story that cancer patients of all ages and their loved ones could learn from, especially about keeping the faith and a great sense of humor and love. This would be a great tribute to that amazing son of yours and you have a talent in writing this journal.
Brenda McCarthy <rbmccarthy@casscomm.com>
Virginia, IL - Wednesday, May 17, 2006 11:06 AM CDT

Hang in there ZACK. Chad Surratt's Grandpa &Grandma
Bill&Mildred Surratt <ratisold@grics.net>
pekin, ill taze - Wednesday, May 17, 2006 10:50 AM CDT

Bless Your heart Zach, I hope you get whatever is holding you here so that you may be a peace.....your mommas...FOREVER GUARDIAN ANGEL!! You will never leave her, she will have you to watch out for her and to just make sure the whole family is alright! You are so LOVED by your family and your extended family that you will live on forever in the stories that people all over this great big world will have to tell of the brave lil boy....ZACH!!!! You are the best Zach!You have taught all of us parents and grandparents alot about this terrible monster that attacks our precious babies. My grandson is "5" and has been fighting for a little over "2"yrs, and has now relapsed, so we are in for a long hard road ahead of us, BUT you have showed us it can be done, we can win.....Love you Zach Allen..Wonder Teen!!! Be At Peace Sweetie!
Luwana(BJs mamaw)caringbridge.org/.wv/bjtammy
ky - Wednesday, May 17, 2006 10:07 AM CDT

I woke up at 4:04 this morning thinking of ZACH -So I prayed for him. The pain and anguish you are dealing with is unbelievable- no wonder you are in a fog! Your honesty and faith throughout Zachary's journey is amazing. Your sweet little girl must also be heart broken. Both your children are beautiful! May God wrap his arms around your family and give you all comfort and peace. Love and continued prayers, Laura (Annabanana.com)
Laura O'Connor <Blakjk6@msn.com>
wheaton, IL USA - Wednesday, May 17, 2006 9:36 AM CDT

Coming across the Caringbridge to tell you that you and your son are in my prayers and thoughts - whatever decisions you make, you will make them with your heart and your son will know that in his heart - his smiles are such gifts to you. God and all the Caringbridge Angels are by your side, holding you gently and guiding you through these difficult days - Peace and strength to all.
Mary H <mch@herzogcrebs.com>
St. Louis, MO - Wednesday, May 17, 2006 8:43 AM CDT

I'm glad you're keeping us updated on Zachary. I know your going through a tough time. I wish there was something I could do. I'm glad he is still able to make you laugh. Just wanted to let you know you're on my mind. I am at work today, but I'm going to try to call you.
Gina <gbooth@insightbb.com>
Groveland, - Wednesday, May 17, 2006 8:00 AM CDT

I always knew you had some moves in you buddy!
Kris Vaupel <whitetail518@yahoo.com>
Pekin, IL USA - Wednesday, May 17, 2006 7:55 AM CDT

I do not know your family but through Zach's page have come to meet a beautiful amazing young man. What an inspiration he is in life. I loved the 'naked butt' story and you will have that forever. Even in pain he is able to inspire and make others smile. God bless and may he be with you and your family during this painful time. I pray that Zach have peace and comfort, surrounded by those he continues to love and inspire. He will certainly have a special place with God.
Nancy Engels <nrengels@yahoo.com>
Appleton, WI USA - Wednesday, May 17, 2006 7:39 AM CDT

Lifting you all up in prayer,
With the heaviest of hearts, Angela - your NB family
the Thomas team Mom <Email@ChristiThomas.com>
- Wednesday, May 17, 2006 7:28 AM CDT

Nikki. Claim the healing even though it looks dim. Claim what he says, by his stripes we are healed. You ask what is keeping Zach here, Only God sister. God has a reason for him to still be here. He may be just giving you more time to enjoy him. I know he is in pain and it is hard to see that happen. I recently went through this with my brother who was unconscious for a week, not knowing anything. He had cancer too. It is horrible. I sympathize with you. It is not easy. Keep the faith and enjoy life with him. I am standing in the gap for you. Looking for a good news update. It can still happen. Don't give up on God.He is there for you.He is still in the miracle business. He is in complete control. Take baby steps. Praying for you to keep you strenght and composure. Praying for healing. Love you
Debbie LeBlanc <DebiRLeBlanc@aol.com>
Breaux Bridge, LA USA - Wednesday, May 17, 2006 7:24 AM CDT

good to hear that your still shakin' it!! :)
lol---gabz
Gabi Dagit <dramabelle92@yahoo.com>
Pekin, il usa - Wednesday, May 17, 2006 6:48 AM CDT

Thoughts, prayers and peace for all of you. Between God and Zach, I am sure you will just know when and how to make those difficult decisions.
Sara B <Urawesome6939@yahoo.com>
Madison, WI - Wednesday, May 17, 2006 6:41 AM CDT

Know that you have so much support and so many arms around you right now and praying for Zach's continued peace.
Heather Wilds <wilds6@cox.net>
Newport News, VA - Wednesday, May 17, 2006 5:57 AM CDT

Oh Nikki my heart is breaking for you. For what its worth when Gerry passed away this year the decision to up everything and add sedation was purely his. I pray above all else for pain control. Thank you for taking some moments out of your precious time to update the site for the many ZACH followers around the world. Please tell him he is the focus of so much prayer God must have his name ringing in his ears.
Lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
UK - Wednesday, May 17, 2006 2:23 AM CDT

Nikki thanks for the update on Zachary my prayers are with him and you Thanks for the funny part it brough A big memory of my Baby Steven just before he left to be with Jesus.
Daisy Peralta <daisyperalta27@aol.com>
New York, NY USA - Wednesday, May 17, 2006 0:02 AM CDT

Nikki, I don't know if you know this or not, but YOU are the best medicine Zach has ever had! How incredible is it that GOD picked you to be this awesome guy's mom! Alyssa and I pray for Zach and your family everyday! Alyssa wants to try to get up there to see him this week! Please know that you have so many people to reach out to whenever and wherever you need us! Give that wonderful guy a big hug and kiss from Alyssa and I! Please tell Zach that we are so proud of him and cherish all of you!
Stephanie Lewellen <balletmom5@sbcglobal.net>
Peoria, IL USA - Tuesday, May 16, 2006 11:47 PM CDT

I have been keeping up with Zach's site for the past year or so. What a great kid he is, and what an exceptional person you are, Nikki, for how wonderful you've made his past year. I had to chuckle when I read your funny story of how he danced butt naked and am so happy that you can laugh and cement that as a happy memory. I have some similar funny memories of my mom before she died that I will never forget and those are the absolute best. My heart and prayers are with Zach and your family right now.
Nancy
CA ` - Tuesday, May 16, 2006 11:30 PM CDT

I am praying that you all have a peaceful, restful night. What an awesome,special family you are. GOD is so good.

Love in CHRIST,
Phyllis
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Tuesday, May 16, 2006 9:50 PM CDT

Hey Zach---
it was great visiting w/you and your family!!
you are so loved don't ever forget that!
Love Always---Gabi Dagit
Gabi Dagit <dramabelle92@yahoo.com>
Pekin, IL U.S.A. - Tuesday, May 16, 2006 5:25 PM CDT

Praying for you right now. What amazing faith. God bless you.
Connie Powell
West Monroe, LA - Tuesday, May 16, 2006 4:21 PM CDT

Praying for a you to have a peace that surpasses all understanding.
Tammy
Champaign, IL USA - Tuesday, May 16, 2006 4:21 PM CDT

We lift you up to the Lord.
Kelly, Mike, Alexa & Payton <m.k.rusch@juno.com>
Mapleton, IL - Tuesday, May 16, 2006 2:45 PM CDT

Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.........

Linda Resinger
Farmington, MO - Tuesday, May 16, 2006 1:22 PM CDT

You are in our thoughts and prayers. God bless all of you! Sheila and Merle
Sheila Allen <Sheila.Allen@sci-us.com>
Glasford, Illinois USA - Tuesday, May 16, 2006 1:01 PM CDT

Praying for God's peace to flow around all of you.
Cindy Humes <humes90@hotmail.com>
- Tuesday, May 16, 2006 12:44 AM CDT

Hey Guys,

I just wanted to let you know that you are on my heart and mind. We are praying GOD's peace and comfort for all of you.

In HIS grip,
Phyllis
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Tuesday, May 16, 2006 11:58 AM CDT

Another day almost done, love and prayers to you all in this journey.
Lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
England - Tuesday, May 16, 2006 11:31 AM CDT

May God bless you and give you much needed strength for each day. My prayers are with you!

Love in Christ,
Gail Dorroh
Gail Dorroh <gdorroh@athletics.msstate.edu>
Bellefontaine, MS USA - Tuesday, May 16, 2006 9:41 AM CDT

Zach and Nikki,
Wanted to let you know that we are thinking about you and love you very much. Peace to you and your family!
Robin Ford
Mankato, MN USA - Tuesday, May 16, 2006 7:09 AM CDT

Hope you all had a peaceful night and continue to share and appreciate each other's love and kindness. You're a wonderful family.
Sara B <Urawesome6939@yahoo.com>
Madison, WI - Tuesday, May 16, 2006 7:09 AM CDT

Hello Zach - praying for you every day - such a long, long battle, peace be with you.
Lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
England - Tuesday, May 16, 2006 6:32 AM CDT

Just checking in on you before i go to bed Zach,your in my thoughts and prayers constantly,
Love Theresa
Executive Director
Cancer Warriors Angel Network
Theresa Heath <theresa@cancerwarriors.org>
Rowlett, Tx - Monday, May 15, 2006 11:02 PM CDT

Zach - We want you to know that we have been praying for you every night. We think of you often~
Parker and Logan Cupi (GSLS kids too) <qpdoll@grics.net>
Pekin, Il 61554 - Monday, May 15, 2006 8:57 PM CDT

I have been thinking of you continually, and wanted to let you know we love you and are praying for you.

Love,
Jen
Jen <kjenwhit@verizon.net>
Staunton, VA - Monday, May 15, 2006 8:46 PM CDT

Hi Zachary, I don't know you, but came across your site and read it. I said a prayer for you and felt so much love coming back from you! We are all connected :)
Love, Andrea <nubira6@yahoo.com>
Vestal, NY - Monday, May 15, 2006 7:54 PM CDT

You and your family are in my prayers. Zach is a special, special young man!

Stephanie
Va - Monday, May 15, 2006 7:02 PM CDT

Coming across the Caringbride - I was led to your site through another - Please know I am praying for all of you and what a special son to give you such a wonderful Mother's Day - may all the Caringbridge Angels hold you up and give you peace and strength during this time.
Mary
St. Louis, MO - Monday, May 15, 2006 3:22 PM CDT

I've been praying for you and continue to do so Zach,know you're loved so very much.
Theresa
Executive Director
Cancer Warriors Angel Network
Theresa Heath <theresa@cancerwarriors.org>
Rowlett, Tx - Monday, May 15, 2006 10:47 AM CDT

Praying for peace and comfort for all of you --
Susan Terry-Wilhelm
Houston, TX USA - Monday, May 15, 2006 10:19 AM CDT

Praying for peace and comfort for all you..
Michele(nurse in NY)
- Monday, May 15, 2006 10:06 AM CDT

Nikki,
Your Zachary is so very thoughtful and I am sure this is a Mother's Day you will never forget. I will continue to pray for your family and especially for Zachary. God will take care of each of you and believe that He knows what is best for each of you. You will never walk alone.
Jan Karels (friend of the Ford's)
Jan Karels <jgkarels@cgintl.com>
- Monday, May 15, 2006 9:24 AM CDT

Praying hard that Zach is comfortable. Nikki, I hope you had a peaceful Mother's Day spending time with your family. Our thoughts are with you day and night. Love to All. The Wallins and Our Angel Brad
Jeff, Lori, Brooke and Angel Brad <Wally1@mchsi.com>
Chillicothe, IL - Monday, May 15, 2006 7:58 AM CDT

Your love and commitment to each other and life has been an amazing thing to all of us. We continue to pray for your peace and comfort.
Heather Wilds <wilds6@cox.net>
Newport News, VA USA - Monday, May 15, 2006 6:04 AM CDT

Nikki, Im glad u and Zackary had a great mother's day... i'll be praying for Zack and your family....
Katie Beth Masters <kbvols22@yahoo.com>
Wise, VA USA - Monday, May 15, 2006 6:01 AM CDT

Nikki, I hope you and Zach had the best Mother's Day Ever!
I hope that you are comfortable and at peace. You have had a very long hard road. I'm praying for you tonight on Cape Cod. God Bless you and your family. Love, Ellen

http://www.caringbridge.org/ma/seanhanson
Ellen Hanson <ehanson89@aol.com>
Cape Cod, Ma - Monday, May 15, 2006 3:28 AM CDT

Good morning - you are all in my prayers today as always. Love to you all.
Lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
England - Monday, May 15, 2006 3:11 AM CDT

LETTING YOU KNOW THAT YOUR THOUGHT OF ON MOTHER'S DAY.KEEPING YOU IN MY THOUGHTS AND IN MY PRAYER'S ALWAYS.

Zach sweety you are amazing keeping you in my thoughts and in my prayer's always.
LOVE ALWAYS BRENDAMY LOVING DAD'S SITE <brurka@shaw.ca~~THE PRAYER BEARS~~>
EDMONTON ,ALBERTA

, - Monday, May 15, 2006 0:32 AM CDT

Dropping by with Mother's Day greetings, and to let you know that I'm praying for Zach and your family. May the Lord's grace and mercy be yours.
Stephanie and RachelJoy <mom2rj@comcast.net>
- Sunday, May 14, 2006 9:14 PM CDT

Zach,
We love you so much. You changed our lives from the day we met you, and we want you to know that God has, and WILL CONTINUE, to use your life for great things. You are touching so many lives - more than most adult ministers will ever reach.

Nikki, I love you so dearly. My heart aches for you more than words can say, and even knowing what an inspiration Zach is to so many others cannot really ease the pain in your heart. I'm sure you'd trade all of that just to have your son whole and well again and here with you. You are one of the most loving and compassionate people I know, and this is so unfair. This mother's day, I hope that there are beautiful moments full of joy that you can carry in your heart forever. And I pray that Zachary has NO pain and that his transition from this world into the next is sheltered in the palm of God's hand. He will never, ever leave the palm of God's hand and the sheltering presence of his love.

I am so worried for you, and I am praying you will be comforted beyond measure somehow. I am praying for you and your entire family, and of course, always for Zach.

Many hugs and love surrounding you across the miles,
Jen, Jacob
Keith, Angel
www.caringbridge.com/va/jacob_bollinger <kjenwhit@verizon.net>
Staunton, VA - Sunday, May 14, 2006 5:22 PM CDT

It's evening time here in England so I'm going to close down - but couldn't go without saying goodnight Zach, you're in my prayers tonight more than ever.
LIsa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
UK - Sunday, May 14, 2006 3:27 PM CDT

Dear Strong Zach,

I am so happy that you are spending the day comforting your mother in your own discomfort. You are the sweetest and strongest boy I have ever come to know, and you have been twice the man you could ever be if you lived 100 more years.

May God Bless you and your Family on your mom's Happiest Mother's Day - and always.

With Love,
Colleen M. Kashino
- Sunday, May 14, 2006 2:47 PM CDT

Nikki Zach and Family...
You are all surely in my daily thoughts and prayers.. I hope Zach gets comfortable. and I love you all!!!
HAPPY MOTHER"S DAY NIKKI!!!
God Bless,
Alyssa Lewellen

Alyssa Lewellen <Aballerina5678@sbcglobal.net>
East Peoria, IL USA - Sunday, May 14, 2006 2:33 PM CDT

Still praying for peace. Love to you all.
Lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
England - Sunday, May 14, 2006 1:27 PM CDT

Zach's life and story have touched the world, including my little corner of it. Nikki, Kylee, Zach, and John, you are in my thoughts and prayers.
Jenny
MD USA - Sunday, May 14, 2006 11:46 AM CDT

Praying that Angels lead Zach home in peace and comfort.
I'm so sorry...
Kim Mease <akakaysma@yahoo.com>
Lancaster, PA USA - Sunday, May 14, 2006 11:12 AM CDT

Happy Mother's day to one of the strongest mother's I know (even if it is only throught CB)
We are praying for Zach!!
Heather Black and NICHOLAS (Neuroblastoma NED since 5/04 <heatherblack99@yahoo.com>
Bolivia, nc - Sunday, May 14, 2006 8:37 AM CDT

Zach and Family,

We just wanted you to know that you are constantly on our minds. We are having hard time resting knowing that another St. Jude patient is suffering and his parents can do nothing but love and comfort. Zach has fought the fight for so long, and Heaven is where he will find peace. Nikki, Mother's Day should be a special day for you as you are the mother of 2 beautiful children. Enjoy each and every minute with your family, although this is not the way is should be. Please call me or let me know if I can be of any help to you. I know the fear, the saddness, and the heartache you are feeling and if I can comfort you in any way, please let me know. Happy Mother's Day to you and let peace and faith surround you. Love Always, Lori Wallin
Jeff, Lori, Brooke and Angel Brad Wallin <Wally1@mchsi.com (309-274-2284)>
Chillicothe, IL - Sunday, May 14, 2006 6:31 AM CDT

After such a long, long, fight if Zach is ready to go home to Jesus then that is what I'll pray for. This boy has truly touched my heart. Thank you Zach, you have inspired me every time I've come to your site. I'm sure Heaven will rejoice your arrival and while your family mourn your loss you will have truly won your fight and got your miracle - God bless you Zach, I pray for peace, peace, peace.
Lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
England - Sunday, May 14, 2006 3:47 AM CDT

Nikki,
Happy Mother's Day to you. Ya'll have been on my mind ever since I read you entry today. My heart just aches for you. I am praying for your strength and Zach's peace and comfort. Please tell John and Kylee that they have not been forgotten, they are always in my prayers also. what a terrible time for all of you. I wish that I could take away some of the pain from all of you. Please know that we love you and are walking thru this with you this best that we know how. I hope you all are resting tonight.

Love in CHRIST,
Phyllis

Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Sunday, May 14, 2006 3:23 AM CDT

Just Praying Praying Praying and asking God to give you the strengh you will need and may Jesus send his Angels to recieve Zachary
Daisy <daisyperalta27@aol.com>
New York , NY USA - Sunday, May 14, 2006 1:12 AM CDT

Thinking of your whole family....hoping that you are finally pain free Zach,My eyes filled with tears as I read your entry, what a special gift to mom, that you had to have "3" cards for her, she must be a VERY SPECIAL MOM, and you are a special Son too!
Luwana(BJs mamaw)caringbridge.org/wv/bjtammy
ky - Saturday, May 13, 2006 10:28 PM CDT

Wow, Nikki~ I have been sitting at my computer for hours- I just read your entire story form beginning to end! I have tears in my eyes and a lump in my throat! I cannot imagine how you are going through this whole ordeal! I know that the love and grace of God can carry us through any kind of storm but as a mom of three- I cannot wrap my arms aroung how you are going through this! Please know that I will be checking in on you daily adn I will bring you before the Lord each time you enter my mind each day! I will pray that God will give you the love, comfort and peace that you need as parents and that Zach will not be in any pain... That he will feel the loving arms of Jesus wrapped aroung him 24/7! And for Kylee that she will cope with this whole thing as best as she can... I have a 14 year old daughter and I am sure that this is a difficilt time full of tears are being shed. I will tell my daughter to put Kylee at the top of her prayer list and I will share your story with our small group at church as well! Our God is good all the time and he is there in the midst of your pain! Please know that we are lifting you before the Lord here in Coatesville, Pa! We will continue to check in now and pray specifally for your daily needs. In Him~ Kate hebb and family
Kate Hebb <katehebb@verizon.net>
Coatesville, Pa - Saturday, May 13, 2006 8:15 PM CDT

Nikki: Happy Mother's Day. What a wonderful son you have. I am praying for no pain and peace to come to Zachary. I pray the Lord wraps his arms around all of you and gives you comfort. Still praying.
Cheryl Renner <rennerg7@AOL.com>
N. Huntingdon, PA - Saturday, May 13, 2006 7:26 PM CDT

Nikki,
We are praying without ceasing for your beautiful Zachary and your dear family. Please let us know if you have needs we can help with.

Standing with you,
Mylissa Horrocks
Bella's Caringbridge Site
Habitat for Hope <mylissa@habitatforhope.org>
Cape Coral, FL USA - Saturday, May 13, 2006 7:18 PM CDT

I'm sure that this will be one very special mothers day - we had ours some time ago (England)...I hope its the most loving, touching mothers day ever. Prayers for a pain free, love filled, family day.
Lisa <Lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
UK - Saturday, May 13, 2006 11:21 AM CDT

Good Morning,
I hope ya'll have a wonderful "SON" filled weekend. We have been praying for no pain. We love you guys, you are in our hearts and prayers.

In HIS grip,
Phyllis

Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Saturday, May 13, 2006 7:41 AM CDT

LETTING YOU KNOW THAT YOUR THOUGHT OF ON MOTHER'S DAY.KEEPING YOU IN MY THOUGHTS AND IN MY PRAYER'S ALWAYS.
SENDING PRAYER'S PRAYER'S PRAYER'S AND MORE PRAYER'S YOUR WAY.
LOVE ALWAYS BRENDAMY LOVING DAD'S SITE <brurka@shaw.ca~~THE PRAYER BEARS~~>
EDMONTON ,ALBERTA

, - Saturday, May 13, 2006 3:00 AM CDT

Dear Kylee, Nikki, John, and of course-the man of the hour-ZACH! I hope you have had a better day, less pain and more enjoyable momments with each other! I asked Micaylan if Kylee was at school today and she said yes. I thought maybe Zach woke up and was feeling better, so she felt it was okay to go to school. Micaylan's praying for all of you and so am I. We are going to Disney with my sister, Julie Singley, Maddie, and Roy on Sat. and I'm sure you all will cross our minds and prayers alot! Keep the faith and know that there are so many angles watching over all of you that I'm sure you can feel their presence! Hugs and kisses to Zach and Kylee for a good nights rest. Micaylan's Mom, Wendy
Wendy McDonald <wmcdonald@grics.net>
Pekin , Il usa - Friday, May 12, 2006 10:04 PM CDT

Hi Zach
I was thinking of you old buddy. Hang in there and please know our family's prayers are with you.
Jim McFarlane <jem6@prodigy.net>
Rockford, IL US - Friday, May 12, 2006 9:26 PM CDT

Nikki Please know you and Zachary are in my prayer he is such A fighter God bless him and keep all his Angels around him please give Zachary A hug and A kiss for me if we were closer I will ask you to please let me visit Zachary. Thanks for sharing your Son you are A very good Mommy.
Daisy Peralta <daisyperalta27@aol.com>
New York, NY USA - Friday, May 12, 2006 7:51 PM CDT

Praying for you Zach....and family!! Stay strong!!
Heather Black and NICHOLAS (Neuroblastoma NED since 5/04 <heatherblack99@yahoo.com>
Bolivia, nc - Friday, May 12, 2006 6:53 PM CDT

Hoping and praying for Zachary to be pain free during this difficult time. Nikki, as a mother, my heart hurts so much for you as I had to watch my son go through such an unfair time in his life, but have faith in knowing that whatever the result may be, Zach will be alright. I want so much to just give you a hug and comfort you, and I am am sure that you have an overwhelming amount of support, but know that you are in my constant thoughts and prayers. God Bless.....Lori Wallin
Jeff, Lori, Brooke and Our Angel Brad <Wally1@mchsi.com>
Chillicothe, Il - Friday, May 12, 2006 4:32 PM CDT

PRAYING .......PRAYING.......PRAYING.......PRAYING......
Phyllis <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Friday, May 12, 2006 2:45 PM CDT

Praying for you all.
Kelly, Mike, Alexa & Payton <m.k.rusch@juno.com>
Mapleton, IL - Friday, May 12, 2006 1:36 PM CDT

Sending prayers to you today.
Cindy <humes90@hotmail.com>
IL - Friday, May 12, 2006 12:49 AM CDT

Thinking of you Zach - and all your wonderful family. Praying for pain free time, peace and smiles. You know your mum does a lovely job with your site - so many people that don't really 'know' you care about you because of your mums faithful updates - you'res is the first thing I hit on my computer every morning and the last thing I look at at night - you're in my thoughts and prayers.XXX
Lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
UK - Friday, May 12, 2006 12:28 AM CDT

Nikki, thinking of you and Zach today. I was reading my calendar and came across this:

Through the storms of life, the Savior�s voice is heard more clearly than before, and His presence is felt with intense reality. Through the blinding rain, the Life Giver extends His nail-scarred hand and takes your trembling hand firmly in His own.

With our hands safe in His, we borrow what we need from Him. He lends us His courage and strength, and paths that we thought were impassable pass beneath our feet, and we move with Him beyond the storm. And there, in the gleaming light of day, we see the eternal value of our lives and know that the gift of life here on earth is made even more valuable by virtue of the chastening of the storm.

You are all loved by so many and prayed for diligently.

Roy, Julie, and Maddie
Julie Singley <rjms99@insightbb.com>
Green Valley, IL USA - Friday, May 12, 2006 10:54 AM CDT

Praying for pain free visits from everyone that makes you smile, Zachary.

Kimberly Mease <kdknd@totalusa.net>
Lancaster, PA USA - Friday, May 12, 2006 10:53 AM CDT

Zach
I've been following your story for a while and my thoughts and prayers are with you. You are a brave and courageous young man...an inspiration.

Missy <rshort@clevelandcountyschools.org>
Shelby, NC 28150 - Friday, May 12, 2006 9:34 AM CDT

Zach, I've been following your journal for over a year and am still here for you with thoughts and prayers. You are an amazing young man and I must say that your friend Kris is also amazing and a good friend to you. You have a lot of love all around you. I hope you get your pain under control and can stay comfortable. Love the picture of you in your new chair.
Brenda McCarthy <bmccarth@idph.state.il.us>
Virginia, IL - Friday, May 12, 2006 9:14 AM CDT

Zach, you are soooo very right!!!!! Strawberry Rhubarb is my very favorite as well. You know as a kid I used to go "stealing" rhubarb from those who just let it go in their alley's behind their homes. I just love it. Now as a mom, I freeze it to make pies all year around.

I know that God is walking with you every step of the way!!!! I pray God brings you painless peace with every passing moment. I just can never give up on God. Oh how I pray stil for a miracle for you Zach....God is able to give one to you I just know it. However, sometimes we just become so tired of the fight as well. You have faught so very hard bud. Just know that we all love you and look up to you as such a warrior and most of all the greatest son to your mama, great brother, great friend and of course great pet care giver, but most most of all child of God!!!!!

I pray for you continued peace and abundant love from all. Dream of happy and healthy times. Visualize the healthy Zach running, playing and loving those you cherish.

You are so very great and so very blessed by God.

Mina and kids w/ our Joey (angel)
mina <maddiemae414@yahoo.com>
mi - Friday, May 12, 2006 8:31 AM CDT

Nikki, John, Zach & Kylee,

How I wish that I could come and visit. I would love to meet all of you. But please know that I am with you in my heart. Give each other a hug for me. I hope you have a good day. I am praying for less pain for Zach and grace and strength for the rest of you.

Love in CHRIST,
Phyllis
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Friday, May 12, 2006 6:36 AM CDT

Zach...a bearded dragon? How cool is that? I'm sure you are smiling today. We are praying for you. You are amazing!
Heather WIlds <wilds6@cox.net>
Newport News, VA USA - Friday, May 12, 2006 5:36 AM CDT

Nikki, I have only signed on one or two other times. I found Zach's site through the Lunch for Life site in Dec. I just wanted to tell you that not only does Zachary's faith amaze me, but so does yours. I CANNOT imagine what you have endured as a mother for the last 9 years. You will truly be rewarded for your faith when you go to Heaven, there is no doubt in my mind. I was in Disney last week with my kids. they are ages 3 and 5. I thought of you all and your pictures from Disney World. I think you went at Christmastime. I check on your site every night that I am at home. The first time I saw a picture of Zachary's big bright smile I was hooked! He is gorgeous, so is your daughter!! As one mom to another, my heart is breaking for you. I now have a few friends who have lost their children. I don't know how you feel, but know that I am praying for you all. Good Bless you!
Gina Barnes <ginabarnes@comcast.net>
olney, MD - Thursday, May 11, 2006 11:39 PM CDT

I hope you have a restful night. May GOD grant you rest and comfort tonight. HE is able.

Love in CHRIST,
Phyllis
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Thursday, May 11, 2006 9:14 PM CDT

You never stop amazing me. You are a blessing. We will continue to say our prayers for you.
Heather Wilds <wilds6@cox.net>
Newport News, VA USA - Thursday, May 11, 2006 4:27 PM CDT

Oh my goodness, Nikki you and John are good parents. I know Zach is loving that dragon. How does Kylee feel about it? We are sending smiles and prayers your way. Have a wonderful day.

Love in CHRIST,
Phyllis

P.S. Please forgive my tardiness, I posted this in another patients guestbook. I am so goofy. I had both sights pulled up at the same time. I guess you were really on my mind :)
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Thursday, May 11, 2006 10:24 AM CDT

I have followed your amazing son's story for a long time but have not posted before. I want to tell you how fortunate I think you are for having a son like Zachary. He is a tribute to you and your great parenting. His determination and love has brought inspiration to many people. He himself is the miracle.
Kathy Olson <kolson@tznet.com>
Wis. Rapids , WI - Thursday, May 11, 2006 10:10 AM CDT

Hi Zach and Nikki,

What a blessing to read another post that Zach is as cheerful as ever and not in pain. Praying for your family, and thinking of you even more.

Peace to all,

Colleen Kashino
Colleen M. Kashino <ckashino@adelphia.net>
- Thursday, May 11, 2006 7:05 AM CDT

Praying for a good day with Spike.
Lisa <lisa.burt@tiscali.co.uk>
England - Thursday, May 11, 2006 1:39 AM CDT

Stay strong and remember we love you ..

Spike sounds really cool,i'm an animal nut so would have fun taking care of him as well,enjoy him.
Love you buddy,
Theresa
Executive Director
Cancer Warriors Angel Network
Theresa Heath <theresa@cancerwarriors.org>
Rowlett, TX - Wednesday, May 10, 2006 11:14 PM CDT

Sleep tight guys. Rest in HIS arms.

Love in CHRIST,
Phyllis
Phyllis Sullivan <psullivan2@midsouth.rr.com>
Southaven, MS - Wednesday, May 10, 2006 9:40 PM CDT

Thinking of you and your family Zachary. Lots of prayers are being said for you.
Amanda
Richmond, TX USA - Wednesday, May 10, 2006 8:20 PM CDT

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