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Cancer Help <Cancer Help>
gKmvHDtFoA, XPWngbyRq vnpTjpDQB - Sunday, July 20, 2008 11:56 AM CDT

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I found this website after googling my sisters name and was touched by one of the journals.
maureen cotroneo
blakley , PA usa - Tuesday, January 29, 2008 1:52 PM CST

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caringbridge
Claudia J. Pauleson <ga1168@aol.com>
Philadelpia, PA USA - Thursday, November 1, 2007 10:51 PM CDT

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Hello! I haven't used this site before, so I hope I am addressing the correct person. Are you the woman who teaches peace, conflict resolution and kindness to elementary school children in Washington, DC? I saw your letter in the Post this morning. I also teach these skills to DC children. I would be interesting in connecting with you and trading notes! Thanks.
Susan <s_coti@hotmail.com>
Washington, DC USA - Friday, April 6, 2007 6:05 PM CDT

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Well I was just searching and I wanted to learn more about caringBridge.
Esperanza <empjopj@msn.com>
phx, az us - Monday, December 4, 2006 7:48 PM CST

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Well I was just searching and I wanted to learn more about caringBridge.
Esperanza <empjopj@msn.com>
phx, az us - Monday, December 4, 2006 7:47 PM CST

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Alicia, John, Ciara, Hunter & ^^Angel^^ Tommy

Congrats!!! I am so excited for you all!

Alicia , Ciara, Hunter & ^^Angel^^ Tommy www.caringbridge.org/ca/bennettboys <Lumberhead@twinwolf.net>
- Sunday, May 15, 2005 6:06 PM CDT

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Great pics of you all celebrating Cinco de Mayo, and what a reason to celebrate! Lucy is just beautiful! Oh the baby pangs that sweet little PINK bundle brings on, lol, but no more babies for me. You have a beautiful family. I wish all the best! Much love from California.
Sheri <sherit@csufresno.edu>
Fresno, Ca - Friday, May 13, 2005 2:03 PM CDT

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Lucy is beautiful!!! May God watch over her as she grows!!
Love to you all,
Camilla Haigler (Angel Alex's mom) <camilla.haigler@timken.com>
Gray Court, s - Friday, May 13, 2005 1:27 PM CDT

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Congratulations - I'm so happy for you! Love the sombreros!

catherinespratt@hotmail.com <catherinespratt@hotmail.com>
washington, dc usa - Friday, May 13, 2005 9:18 AM CDT

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Viva Lucia!! What a happy day. Felicidades to you all. So much love. Wonderful.
Suzanne LaFetra <suzlafetra@yahoo.com>
Berkeley, CA - Thursday, May 12, 2005 7:24 PM CDT

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Congrats, Prof. Mezey! I hope all of you are doing well. Lucy is adorable!
Courtney Donovan
Houston, TX - Thursday, May 12, 2005 3:57 PM CDT

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Dear Professor Mezey,

Congratulations on the birth of your daughter. She is beautiful (and I love the name Lucia:)! Jake looks very cute in the pictures too. I wish you much happiness and love. I've been reading your journal for the past year and have kept you in my prayers. You are an inspiration to us all. And you're a great professor! I wish you continued success.

Stephanie Cotilla (section 3/class of 2003) <stephaniecotilla@hotmail.com>
Baltimore, MD - Thursday, May 12, 2005 7:18 AM CDT

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THANK YOU for posting your happy news and joyful photos. Enjoy these exhausting, joyful first days and weeks together.

Ole!

Hallie Flint Gilman
Alexandria, VA 22314 - Wednesday, May 11, 2005 7:13 AM CDT

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Congratulations, dear Naomi, Matt, and Jake, on Lucy's safe and noisy arrival! I have been checking on you off and on since the Trimpers were at Duke with you and have been praying that the Lord would give you something in this world to assuage at least a layer of your grief. May the joy you feel as you hold Lucia be a memory and a promise.
Carolyn Wyman <sythismom@yahoo.com>
Belding, MI Triumphant Trimper Trio Country - Tuesday, May 10, 2005 4:47 PM CDT

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Oh, congratulations! Oh, celebrations! Wishing you joy and happiness forever and always and all the richness lthis ife offers!
(Just sent you something last week, Naomi, via snail mail but hadn't heard this beautiful news.... )
Saw this (below) recently on a Web site and remembered it now, thinking of you all, beautiful Mezey Paul family.:

"A favorite Scandianian holiday tradition is tied to the beautiful white clad figure of Lucia, the 'bearer of light,' who illuminates the darkness of winter on the morning of December 13th. ..."
Cynthia Rockwell <crockwell@wesleyan.edu>
Middletown, CT - Tuesday, May 10, 2005 2:05 PM CDT

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Super Congratulations to all of you. I too will miss my daily
checking in on this website, but I know Matt's Dad will keep
us well informed and show us lots of pictures. She is beautiful. Shirley at LI.
Shirley Starnes <sstarnes@niaid.nih.gov>
Bethesda, MD USA - Tuesday, May 10, 2005 7:33 AM CDT

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I LOVE LUCY! And I haven't even seen a picture of her yet. I am so happy for you all. Julien must be beeming. I can't wait to see if she has a head of black hair??
Jane Trimper <jatrimper@cms.maisd.com>
Stanton, MI USA - Monday, May 9, 2005 6:20 AM CDT

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Welcome Lucy to this world! You could not have been born into a more loving family! May you grow in the grace, love and fun of your family. they are stronger than you willl ever know and will guide you in a way that leads to life and love. And Naomi - you are indeed a marvel (9 lbs!!!!). I too will miss your entries - they always brought me hope, even amongst the sorrow! I pray many special blessings for you all as you begin to grow together as a family. May God continue to hold you all in the palm of His out-stretched hand! Lisa
Lisa Boyd, LI/NIH <lboyd@niaid.nih.gov>
Bethesda, MD - Monday, May 9, 2005 5:27 AM CDT

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Big congrats Naomi, Matt and Jake. Welcome to Lucy! I'm so very happy that your little miss arrive safely and that you are doing well. Naomi, have a Happy Mother's Day.
Much love from California.
Sheri <sherit@csufresno.edu>
Fresno, CA - Saturday, May 7, 2005 10:43 PM CDT

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I screamed at the top of MY lungs WITH an epidural until I produced a baby exactly HALF the size of Lucy. You're a better man than I am, Charlie Brown! Mix in a Mexican hat dancing husband and a mother who tries to steal the show with tumbling stunts and I warrant there isn't an Elizabeth Bishop verse that even comes close. Do you know the one by W.D. Snodgrass which begins: "There, there sir. You have every cause/ For tears; which of us blames your grief?/ Knowing what high estate you've lost,/ What powers, what opulence you leave," and ends "May your new family have a good/ Baby; you have a good exile." It's a lovely poem, but Elizabeth scans better than Snodgrass as a middle name. Elizabeth, in fact, is MY middle name, which reminds me, I will miss your journal entries dearest Naomi as they always leave me feeling only a little less than kin and more than kind. Can you tell I'm giddy with thoughts of you, Matt, and Jake holding tight to that baby. She will, indeed, have good exile. Love, Jane
Jane ELIZABETH Purcell <jpurcell@uia.net>
Claremont, CA USA - Saturday, May 7, 2005 9:19 PM CDT

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Wonderful! I have been checking the website daily since the 2nd, knowing that it would be soon! I echo the earlier comment that 05-05-05 will at least be easy to remember! One day, Naomi, you will have to tell me how you did it - nine pounds with no epidural! I hope to get to meet her someday! With love,
Melissa Kramer <mrm48@law.georgetown.edu>
Ellicott City, MD - Saturday, May 7, 2005 5:35 PM CDT

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Congratulations to you all... I can't wait to come visit.

Love,
Sarah
Philadelphia, PA - Saturday, May 7, 2005 2:13 PM CDT

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Congradulations to the Paul Mezey clan. Naomi, I have always known you were an amazing and strong woman. Now I am a little bit afraid of you as well. No epidural with a 9+ lb baby. WOW! Katy
Katy Roth <rothkk@georgetown.edu>
DC, - Saturday, May 7, 2005 2:05 PM CDT

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Welcome to the world Lucy! We can't wait to meet you. You are a lucky girl, to be born into such a wonderful and loving family. Matt, Naomi & Jake, congratulations!
Much love, Alex, Blake & Amelia
Alex McClure <kalexmcc@hotmail.com>
San Francisco, CA - Saturday, May 7, 2005 12:18 AM CDT

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Welcome Lucy! Great name, Jake! We all love her already. We'll be coming around soon to get a sniff of that new baby smell. love you all! - Linda
Linda Ryden <rosiefolks@aol.com>
Washington, DC US - Saturday, May 7, 2005 5:38 AM CDT

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Congrats to you all.
Happy Mother's Day, Naomi. Get lots of rest and enjoy your wonderful family. You deserve it.
Debbie Williams <crzydebi@hotmail.com>
Madera, CA - Saturday, May 7, 2005 0:08 AM CDT

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Congrats, you two! Melissa Williams is spreading the news far and wide. That's going to be one lucky girl. : )
Matt Berman <matt.berman@gmail.com>
Washington, DC - Friday, May 6, 2005 4:27 PM CDT

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Coach let me know about the baby a short
time after she arrived and I hear Grandma Olivia, fell head over heels for her....
What a great Mother's Day present...Much
love to all.


Great Grandma Mary <mmellis@webtv.net>
Urbana, IL - Friday, May 6, 2005 3:22 PM CDT

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Congratulations!! We are so happy for you. Born in the five o'clock hour on 5/5/05? That is too cool.
Much love,
Suzanne Kim & Doug Yatter

Suzanne Kim <suzanneakim@hotmail.com>
Palo Alto, CA U.S.A. - Friday, May 6, 2005 3:00 PM CDT

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Mazel Tov on your new arrival! I know she is being welcomed with open arms into a circle of love and joy.
Andrea Prasow <aprasow@paulweiss.com>
New York, NY USA - Friday, May 6, 2005 2:37 PM CDT

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What wonderful news, Oh we're so happy for you all!!
Andrea & Pat Harrington <aharrington@ci.claremont.ca.us>
Claremont, CA USA - Friday, May 6, 2005 2:20 PM CDT

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Yahoo. What happy and wonderful news. Cannot wait
to meet the little snapper. Do we get to vote
on her name?
Jason <loviglio@umbc.edu>
- Friday, May 6, 2005 1:07 PM CDT

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Hooray! What a great day for you all - on Cinco de Mayo and right before Mother's Day! Happiness, peace, joy and love to you all!
Julie T. <thomasja@law.georgetown.edu>
Washington, DC USA - Friday, May 6, 2005 10:27 AM CDT

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Best news I could've gotten this morning! Congratulations to you all, and a very, very happy Mother's Day to you, Naomi. :)

Love,
Melissa
Melissa Williams <melissa.williams@gmail.com>
Arlington, VA - Friday, May 6, 2005 9:34 AM CDT

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Woo-hoo! Congratulations on the new baby! 5-5-05 is a muy caliente birthdate. Best wishes to mother, father, and brother for a happy and healthy infancy and beyond. Cheers, Chris & Katy.
Chris Weston <cweston@starpower.net>
- Friday, May 6, 2005 8:30 AM CDT

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Naomi, Matt, Jake & Julien,

I know you only from reading your journal entries and I am always inspired by what I have read. I am a student in nursing school, and I often wonder how I will come to deal with the tragedies that come my way. Even though my experiences as a nurse will not be with my family members, I am a firm believer in giving as much love to those around you as one is capable of. I have learned a remarkable amount about giving, expressing and experiencing love through your writings and hope that in my career that I will be able to express and show this.

May your family be blessed as much as you have blessed those around you, and may you find peace always. Peace to Julien, and welcome to the new baby.
Jen Scutari (Julie T.'s sister) <jscutari@twcny.rr.com>
Camillus, NY USA - Wednesday, May 4, 2005 4:16 PM CDT

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I have only found your page today and I have spent some time reading your story. Your words bring tears to my eyes yet fill me with hope and peace. They take my breath away. Your words keep your beautiful angel alive even to those of us who were not fortunate enough to have known him. I wish for you wonderful days. Days in the future that are filled by making new memories by holding the past ones close. Thank you for sharing your Julien with me. My life is forever changed.
Kel
Canada - Friday, April 15, 2005 5:12 PM CDT

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Naomi,

I went back and read the entries from last year. It is still unfathomable to me. But the thought that keeps returning to my mind is that Julien is still around keeping watch over your family, including your soon to be new addition. In so many ways, it's tragic that he can't be here physically with you. In so many ways, I can't even begin to imagine what the past two years have held for you all. Your family is a model for us all; I only hope I live and act with the strength and love that you guys have shown.
Melissa Kramer <mrm48@law.georgetown.edu>
Ellicott City, MD USA - Friday, April 8, 2005 5:20 PM CDT

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Naomi, Matt and Jake -

I've been checking this page almost daily since you started posting. Every time I've logged on I've lost my breath (at your loss, articulateness, and generous love). Nearly every time I've also lost my nerve (what could I have to say in this guestbook?).

Thank you so much for sharing your news, reflections, heartache (and hopes!). I'll be checking the site until the baby arrives, and checking in with all five of you in my prayers after that.

Hallie Flint Gilman <hallie_gilman@hotmail.com>
Alexandria, VA - Tuesday, April 5, 2005 2:28 PM CDT

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dear naomi, matt and jake,
thank you, thank you for continuing to keep us updated about your lives. it makes complete sense to end this website but as you know the embracing love and caring we friends and family feel for all of you will never end. my heart hurts for all of you, and i wish i could give you all a big hug. matt, i swim three times a week with a masters swim team near my home and have been doing so for many years. i think of you often when i swim. swimming has been extremely helpful for me over the years, and not just physically. i look forward to reading about the birth of your baby--best wishes for a safe and speedy delivery. we are expecting a second baby in october as well, but hope to make it to DC over the next few years.
with love,
selena (dong) epley and family
selena dong epley <mepley@hotmail.com>
chula vista, ca usa - Monday, April 4, 2005 2:26 PM CDT

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Naomi and family,
It was an honor to be with you for the unveiling ceremony.While we have all used this website to follow your unimaginable journey, I know that none of us need it in order to remember your sweet boy. We look forward to hearing your good news in the future and we wish you all the health and joy that you can possibly muster in the years to come.
Debbie Williams <crzydebi@hotmail.com>
Madera, CA - Monday, April 4, 2005 1:18 PM CDT

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Dear Naomi, Matt and Jake, This life will truly not ever allow us all to comprehend the loss of little Julien. His life has touched us all in innumerable ways. And isn't that is what a life is supposed to be about. We are not to be isolated and unto ourselves, but we are to touch others. The struggle that you and your little family have endured the last few years have touched us all - we have seen courage, hope, faith, and miraculous strength when the finality of this little life came to an end. But Julien is alive in so many ways and although we cannot touch him physically, we are so connected spiritually to him that is is hard sometimes to believe he is still not here. My prayers for you have been answered in that things are beginning to fill that void left by little Julien. He will never be replaced, but the void will be filled with the love of God shown by so many people who do even the simplest things. And isn't that how God really works...it is amazing to me that he will prompt us flawed humans to reach beyond ourselves to touch a life in such a way as share in the joy as well as the sadness of this life. I will miss this site, your eloquence, and your passion for your son. But I know that the new life which will enter your family will bring back some of the day to day joy you need right now to move to the next phase of this journey called life. I pray that the Lord will continue to sustain you each day and will continue to open your eyes to the smallest joy of each day! The first year is behind you, and although the pain will always be there on some level, it will ease, ever so slightly, until it can be endured. My prayers will continually be with you all. Because He lives.... Lisa
Lisa Boyd <LBoyd@niaid.nih.gov>
Bethesda, MD USa - Sunday, April 3, 2005 9:50 PM CDT

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I haven't signed for a long time, but I certainly haven't forgotten you. When
I turned my weekly calendar last week
there was my notation "Julien gone (1 year). It brought a tear to my eye and
a horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach. So, when I checked your page today and found your new message, I wanted you to know, no one has forgotten....we never will....I have shared your messages with friends who
have had tragedies this past year and your words always comfort them. You both write so eloquently and we all get comfort from you, when we should be doing the comforting. I have kept so many of your entries and have one big file which also includes many pictures of Julien and Jake.....And now I am adding pictures of
Jack....my third great grandson....and soon will be adding pictures of the new baby. Thank you for posting this recent note and God Bless you all....Hugs

Great Grandma Mary <mmellis@webtv.net>
Urbana, IL - Sunday, April 3, 2005 2:12 PM CDT

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Naomi and Matt,Your website has meant a lot to me. The courage you and Matt have shown and the extraordinary heart of the amazing Jake have brightened countless days. God bless you. Love, Steve
Steven Goldberg <goldberg@law.georgetown.edu>
- Friday, April 1, 2005 1:53 PM CST

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Thank you for sharing so much of yourselves. Many of your entries helped me through my journey of grief. I know how difficult the anniversary of Julien's death was - we experienced many of the same emotions on the anniversary of Alex's death. Best wishes with the new baby. FYI...I found out that I am pregnant this past Friday. God still sends us joy - we just have to be willing to accept it. May God continue to give you Peace and Joy. Love always,
Camilla Haigler (Angel Alex's mom) <camilla.haigler@timken.com>
Gray Court, sc - Friday, April 1, 2005 12:51 AM CST

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Dear Naomi, Matt and Jake,
I am always reminded that at the time of Julien's death, the cherry blossoms were in full bloom.
And tomorrow heralds the beginning of April and all around Spring is imminent with bulbs poking through the rich soil.
Julien will forever be imprinted in my mind as life passing into life.
We wish you comfort and healing, and great expectations with the coming of a new little life.
Nicki Karlen and family <enkarlen@optonline.net>
Rockaway, NJ - Friday, April 1, 2005 8:49 AM CST

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Dear Naomi, Matt, & Jake,
Even as I've been thinking of you all this week, I've been cowardly and selfishly resisting really letting in feeling Julien's loss. It's so very wrong when of course you don't have the luxury of denial -- or really, as you've shown again and again, are just too brave to bury your grief. I finally read your recent journal entry today and was filled again with the profound, wrenching sadness that you struggle with daily. As my tears pour out for you, I continue to be amazed by your strength to endure the trajedy of losing Julien. I'm sending you my deepest, strongest loving thoughts and hope for your healing. And I'm remembering all the wonder, strength, and spirit of Julien.
All my love and bear hugs,
Anne <anne.wolf@hhs.gov>
Baltimore, MD - Friday, April 1, 2005 7:40 AM CST

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Dear Naomi, Matt, and Jake,

I have been thinking of you all this week--I wanted to add my well wishes to those of your family and other friends. It's a sad thing for those of us who don't know you well to say goodbye to the website--but perhaps one day I will get to meet all of you in person and be able to tell you face to face how much I admire you. Thank you for continuing to write through your sadness, and if you are ever in Philadelphia and need anything, count me among the many people who would welcome your family as friends!
All the best, always,
Fernanda Moore (Kate Stoia's friend)
Fernanda Moore <fernandamoore@yahoo.com>
Swarthmore, PA - Thursday, March 31, 2005 1:40 PM CST

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All March have been difficult but especially the last days,our thoughts were with you all time .
We completely understand the decision to close the website,we will just use the regular email or the phone more often to check on you all.

We hope will see you soon

All our love

Nadine and the rest of the family
Monette Jacques et jonathan included



Nadine <feinsohncarmel@yahoo.com>
Natanya, Israel - Thursday, March 31, 2005 2:15 AM CST

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I just wanted to let you know that you've been on my mind alot this week. I'm glad you were all together yesterday and were able to have some fun together. I'm sure Julien was smiling down on you. I hope you continue to find peace.
Much love from California.
Sheri <sherit@csufresno.edu>
Fresno, Ca - Wednesday, March 30, 2005 9:59 PM CST

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Thinking of you and wish you all the best in the future.
Shirley from LI
Shirley Starnes <sstarnes@niaid.nih.gov>
Bethesda, MD USA - Wednesday, March 30, 2005 3:54 PM CST

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dear naomi, matt, and jake,

i know yesterday was very hard and in some ways a lot of the old wounds felt raw again, but we're taking comfort that you all are looking ahead to new life (we're so excited for you!) and new details and problems that--god willing--will be ever so mundane.

we love you, we love julien and miss him again.
Here's to spring.

love,
michael & family
Michael Lorant <mikelorant@earthlink.net>
Newton, MA USA - Wednesday, March 30, 2005 9:10 AM CST

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Dearest Naomi, Matt and Jake,
You have all been in my thoughts today. So many wonderful memories of Julien have been coming back to me, making me smile each time I heard Julien say, "Yea-yah," and see his contagious smile extend from ear to ear. His vibrance, energy and unpredictable attitude will be forever locked in my memory.
Love,
Cheryl Lynn
Cheryl Lynn Horton <ch8@duke.edu>
Arlington , VA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 9:01 PM CST

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Dear Naomi, Matt and Jake,

Walking home from school along College Avenue today, I came upon the roses planted for each of you. All of them were blooming. Most of Julien's arms were inside Buddah's rose, but one arm had reached through the big cyclone fence and had blossomed on the other side of it, a large double delight bloom at nose height for a child. Little children walking down the sidewalk were stopping to smell it, smiling with delight and walking on. It seemed to me that Julien was giving each child a gift on his new birthday.
It would be like him to do that.



Olivia Ellis (Gran) <osellis@msn.com>
Claremont, CA U.S.A. - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 7:51 PM CST

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Naomi and Matt and Jake, I'm thinking of you and sending healing vibes in your direction.
Love, Sarah
Philadelphia, PA - Monday, March 28, 2005 11:08 PM CST

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Alicia , Ciara, Hunter & ^^Angel^^ Tommy www.caringbridge.org/ca/bennettboys <Lumberhead@twinwolf.net>
- Saturday, March 26, 2005 12:13 AM CST

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Matt, Naomi and Jake,

Just stopping in because I've been thinking of you this last week... After re-reading bits of your journal, I realized Julien's 1 year anniversary is coming up.

I can't claim to have walked in your shoes, but I imagine you must feel so many different emotions. Although the sense of loss may be vivid and fresh, I hope the sense of hope is just as powerful, if not more so.

I look forward to working with Sheri to raise awareness and money for Light the Night and walking in Julien's memory.

Sincerely,
Jennifer Burgess/Friends of Allie & Raise Awareness
<pr@friendsofallie.org>
Fresno, CA - Friday, March 25, 2005 2:45 AM CST

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Dear Naomi, Matt and Jake -

Sunday was a beautiful warm day here in Durham and as we were outside working in the yard we started talking about Julien. Wiley decided we should add more sticks to the armory under the big fir tree, thought you might like to know that it is still there. We think about you often and feel blessed to have spent time with your family.
Caroline, Wiley, Eric and Elise
Caroline Clements <clementscaroline@yahoo.com>
Durham, NC - Tuesday, March 15, 2005 6:50 AM CST

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Dear Naomi, Matt, & Jake,

I am glad, as always, that I keep on checking this website...and thank you for the latest entry, Matt. Very eloquently put.

I wanted you to know that a good friend of mine (with whom I did the Big Sur Trail half-marathon back in October) is now training for a full marathon with Team in Training--to raise money to fight leukemia--and she will be running with Julien's name on her jersey (among others).

I hope your pregnancy is going VERY well!! I have been thinking of you so much. (I've got 10 weeks to go w/our boy, hoping to make it to full term this time.) Hang in there and take extra good care of yourselves! I know Julien is watching over you all, twinkling that beautiful smile, adding his magic in unseen ways. Lots of love,
Helen <hshafran@tcsn.net>
Oceano, CA - Saturday, March 12, 2005 8:43 PM CST

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Hope the pregnancy is going well. Matt - your entry "swimming" is great!
Camilla Haigler (Angel Alex's mom) <camilla.haigler@timken.com>
Gray Court, s - Monday, March 7, 2005 2:46 PM CST

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Dear Matt,
Keep breathing. Keep going. You're doing great. Thank you so much for sharing.
Love,
Suzanne <suzlafetra@yahoo.com>
Berkeley, CA - Tuesday, February 22, 2005 11:04 PM CST

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Dear Matt,
I'm glad you started swimming again and thanks for sharing,"Swimming" with us. Like you, but probably not exactly like you, I too, we all are struggling adjusting to this first year without Julien. For me too, things, simple thinks and situations that I thought I knew how to handle, now can give me problems. I too have met people this year who did not know Julien and who do not know about Julien. The hardest question I have to answer from time to time is, "How many grandchildren do you have?" I want to say, "four but..." but I say three and the number sticks a bit in my throat. I say three with my mouth but I feel four in my heart. I think the answer to that simple question will forever be a problem for me.

Keep swimming, it's one stroke at a time.

Love you all,
Mother



Marilyn Paul <marilyn.paul2@verizon.net>
Washington, DC - Thursday, February 17, 2005 12:12 AM CST

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Naomi, You have been in my thoughts often this past year since Kim Sargent told me about Julien's illness. I felt a bit voyeuristic reading the entries, but the writing is so beautiful, raw and heartfelt and sitting here with some down time at work, I was unable to stop...weeping and with chills I read many of the entries and I just wanted to reach out and give you a virtual hug. I had wanted to do the bone marrow test for Julien when that request was sent out but I was pregnant at the time as I gather you are now. I was so haunted, thinking about your little boy, wondering what you were going through.When Kim told me he had passed away after a long struggle I wanted to reach out to you then--but I can only imagine the need to retreat a bit--particularly from the random, person like me from the past. Perhaps it can give you a small smidgen of solace to know that your experience touched someone like me so far away--I look at my boys and there will be a small part of me that will think of little Julien.

My older son Sasha is 4 days younger than your Jake and Nikolai is 17 months. Perhaps one day they can meet. Hey it's only been 17 years since we last saw one another. I wish you all the best- your little guy will always be in my thoughts and I hope you are able to breathe again--take care of yourself and your family

Lots of love

Darya
Darya Mead <darya_mead@yahoo.com>
SF, CA USA - Tuesday, February 8, 2005 5:56 PM CST

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Hi Naomi, Matt and Jake,
Thanks for the beautiful update Matt. I am happy that you are able to breath, sometimes. I hope those times aregrowing more frequent.

The Fresno Leukemia and Lymphoma Society is gearing up for Light The Night 2005. I recieved a call last week asking me to be on the committee this year. I am very honored. We will be walking for Julien and Allie again this year. Last year we raised over $2100. This year we hope to do more. If you are in the Fresno area and are reading this, my email is below. I'd love to have you walk with us!! If you are related, expect a personal invite ;-)

Thank you for sharing your sweet little boy with us. Our lives will never be the same because of him. My boys have a better mommy because of you. And I'm doing things to make a difference, that I may not be doing if I didn't know you and Julien. I hope that knowing Julien's life continues to make a difference will bring you some peace today.
Sheri Taylor <sherit@csufresno.edu>
Fresno, Ca - Tuesday, February 8, 2005 12:30 AM CST

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Dear Matt,
What beautiful writing. Exactly. Sending love and buoyant thoughts to you all,
--xc
Cynthia Rockwell <crockwell@wesleyan.edu>
Middletown, Ct USA - Tuesday, February 8, 2005 11:07 AM CST

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Hi Guys.
I think of you often and I'm glad to hear that you are able to "breathe on both sides". I hope you gain strength daily. You are going to be greatly blessed this year. Take care and keep on "swimming"!!!
Debbie Williams <crzydebi@hotmail.com>
Madera, CA - Tuesday, February 8, 2005 0:51 AM CST

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Matt--

I am so happy to read your entry and see you are feeling good these days. I've never been a swimmer, but I can imagine how being water-bound allows for an extra degree of solitude and sensation that can add to the psychic benefits of any exercise. There's a line in the silly movie Postcards From the Edge that I've always liked. Annette Bening (doesn't she look like someone we know?)plays a bimbo starlet who tells the Carrie Fisher character how much she likes running because it really gets her endolphins going. I bet you get extra endolphins while swimming! Keep it up!!

Love,
Huntley
Diane Huntley <drhuntley@aol.com>
Occidental, CA - Monday, February 7, 2005 6:16 PM CST

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I swim (very slowly) about three times a week at the Fitness Center. Your thoughtful entry made me think about why I do it. Part of it, I suppose, is for the exercise, but part of it is that sometimes I forget where I am and I think I'm 14 years old and back at the Rock Creek Swim Team in Silver Spring. Love, Steve
Steven Goldberg <goldberg@law.georgetown.edu>
- Monday, February 7, 2005 3:16 PM CST

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Nice journal entry. One of the things I like about it is it reminds me of the theme song to the show Good Times, and particularly the lyric "keeping your head above water." I am about to join a club in Austin that has the mini pools that create a flow of water that you swim against -- a swimming treadmill basically. That's the best way I know to keep from bumping into other people. I am hoping they will install a diving board and a little basketball hoop so I can practice my trick shots. When I was an undergrad, we used to go to all the senior swim meets. Fun stuff. Takes me back.
Lefty Driesell
Austin, TX - Friday, February 4, 2005 9:34 PM CST

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Just wanted to say hello to all three of you. It's been a long time since I saw your faces, which is a loss for me, but I think of you often.
love
Sasha
Sasha Natapoff <alexandra.natapoff@lls.edu>
Los Angeles, CA - Friday, February 4, 2005 4:26 PM CST

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Dear Naomi and Matt,
It is true that your tragedy is a private one, and that the sun continues to come up, the stock market still quivers, the pine cones fall from their branches. But not one of us is untouched by your family.

Yes, it is your private loss, and we cannot lesson your grief. But in the deep sadness that I have felt this past year, I have also gained many things. Maybe there is something soothing in knowing that a world of people have derived such depth and meaning, such gratitude and love, from being connected to your family.

As always, I appreciate your words, the connection you share with all of us. Thank you for that. With love,

Suzanne LaFetra <suzlafetra@yahoo.com>
Berkeley, CA - Tuesday, February 1, 2005 8:02 PM CST

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Hi Naomi ~ I just wanted to stop by and say hi. You have been on my mind often lately. I hope you are feeling well. Take care.
Sheri Taylor <taylor99@csufresno.edu>
Fresno, Ca - Tuesday, January 25, 2005 11:05 PM CST

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Walking into the school yard this morning I saw the arms of Jacob's rose bush were still bent over at a 90 degree angle and still embracing Julien's rose arms about four feet away. It delighted Jake when he saw it over the holidays, and he leaned over and kissed the "Double Delight" buds on Julien's rose, licking the dew from the red and cream petals, inhaling and tasting the sweet scent. I had guessed that maybe nature had created a temporary phenomenon for Jake's benefit. But it now looks like a permanent position for the two rose bushes. And today, each tip of Jake's arms is blossoming inside the body of the other. And the peach tree next to the rose garden is blossoming, and the nectarine tree above the
frog bench named for Jake and Julien is full of bees humming between its pink translucent blooms. Next to it, Julien's dolphin topiary has new green growth pushing through the wire. Lilies and lavender bloom along the fence that edge the garden, California poppies are coming up everywhere, and sweet alyssum blooms between the stepping stones. The rainy days from a week ago ended with a rainbow and warm sunshine, leaving us with spring in January, a blossoming garden, and
singing birds building brand-new nests. Just in time for your birthday, Naomi. I hope you can hear the trills from there.
Olivia Ellis <osellis@msn.com>
Claremont, CA USA - Tuesday, January 18, 2005 1:41 PM CST

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Naomi,

Just checking in, missing you and hoping you're well.

Love,
Sarah
Sarah Westergren <sarahwestergren@mindspring.com>
Rockville, MD USA - Monday, January 17, 2005 10:57 PM CST

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Great hearing about Jake's fun at Disneyland. There is nothing like a happy kid's perspective. This gives me hope that my kids enjoyed our decades-ago visit to Disneyworld in Florida. I admit that the Small World ride drove me nuts (I can still hear that song, over and over and over). But maybe Joe and Becky had Jake's point of view. Love, Steve
Steven Goldberg <goldberg@law.georgetown.edu>
- Friday, January 14, 2005 9:45 AM CST

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Alicia & ^^Angel^^ Tommy www.caringbridge.org/ca/bennettboys <Lumberhead@twinwolf.net>
- Wednesday, January 12, 2005 10:21 PM CST

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Glad you found some bright spots during the holidays.
Camilla Haigler <camilla.haigler@timken.com>
Gray Court, sc - Monday, January 3, 2005 4:32 PM CST

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Matt & Naomi:
I haven't written for a while. Just wanted to let you
know that I am here following what you choose to share.
All of our love.
Jonathan <jpaulcarmel@yahoo.com>
Netanya, Israel - Monday, January 3, 2005 1:12 PM CST

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Dear Naomi & Family,
I just wanted to say hello and let you know that you have been on my mind. I could not stop thinking about you on the 28th! I don't know how many times I glanced towards the soaking valley foothills and thought of your family. Your beloved JJ is such a strong presence; loved so greatly and missed by so many. May your family truly have peace this coming year. As your family grows (literally) I hope your strength and love and closeness grows as well. I'm sorry that I didn't get to see you while you were in town. Maybe I'll see you in March? Take Care and keep us all posted.
Debbie Williams <crzydebi@hotmail.com>
Madera, CA - Sunday, January 2, 2005 11:58 PM CST

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