History

Wednesday, September 2, 2009 8:47 PM CDT

I can't believe I didn't update all summer. I guess there really isn't much to update. We all had a very relaxing summer. Busy, but relaxing.

Charli just started her Senior year. I can't believe it. She's still a sweetie. We did some more college searches this summer. Rutgers is still her first choice, then Univ of Maryland. I can't believe we will be empty nesters so soon. We were cheated out of 5 years though. I love these years of them being teens, coming into who they are.

I think Cameron would have been kinda nerdy, into computers and things like that. I dont think he would have liked girls yet, but who knows. It actually makes me very sad to even think about the fact that he would have started 7th grade this year.

Thanks for checking in on us.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009 8:23 PM CDT

Another summer has begun. Actually Charli is not quite out of school yet, she is still taking finals.

We are all doing fine. We just returned from a short vaction in Jamaica to attend out friends wedding. It was beautiful and we had a great time. Charli and I went parasailing and she jumped off a cliff. It was nice. We wondered if Cam would have been a great swimmer by now. He would be going into his second year of middle school. I can't imagine what he would be like. I still picture him at 8.

We have no real plans for the summer. We will try to get some college visits in.

Thank you to all of you that keep checking on us. Keep all of the famillies in your prayers.

Tuesday, May 5, 2009 7:38 PM CDT

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DUDE!!!!!!

I can't believe you would be 12. I bet you would still be the sweet caring little boy you were, just bigger.

We miss you more than you could ever imagine.

Tuesday, March 31, 2009 7:19 PM CDT

Sorry it's been so long. We are all doing well. The sping is slowly trying to show it's face but these frosty CT mornings are still hanging in.

Charles changed jobs this month and has been traveling a little more. Charli dislocated her thumb and is in a cast because of the torn ligaments. Her lacrosse season started 3 days after so needless to say she is pretty bummed.

Even though she is injured she still goes to practice so I come home to an empty house which I can't stand.

We all miss Cameron like crazy. It still seems like this is a joke.

Thanks for checking in on us!!!

Friday, March 6, 2009 8:41 PM CST

Happy 17th Birthday to Charli!

I can't believe she's 17. I feel so old. She is such a blessing. I wonder what Cameron would have bought her for her birthday. I wonder if he would still be so sensitive and sweet or would puberty have kicked in and changed him.

We still miss Cam alot and talk about him often. Charli got a car this month and we alway talk about how cool he would think he was having her drive him around.

Not much else is going on here in CT. Charli is in school until June 30 because of all the snow days. That is crazy. She will be turning around and heading back in a few weeks. Either way, I can't wait to get to hang out with her. That's my favorite part of the summer.

Thanks for checking in on us.

Monday, February 2, 2009 11:02 PM CST

So sorry I haven’t updated. We have all been up to the same thing kinda – work and school. Charli and I took an amazing trip to DC for the inauguration. Charles took a snowboarding trip to Tahoe; other than that just working and going to school. We tend to have fun with friends and family in between.

I really didn’t even want to leave a message and just pretend that this was like every other day. I can’t believe it’s been 3 years! It seems like yesterday and yet I haven’t hugged my baby boy in 3 long – very long years. We miss him so much! There really isn’t much else to say about that. Our lives are not the same without Cameron. Everyday is so hard, for all of us.

For all that are checking in on us still – thank you. It means so much. I hope that everyone remembers today what a wonderful, special, caring, happy and overall special child that Cameron was.

Sunday, December 21, 2008 5:56 PM CST

Sorry for no updates. I hope that people still check to see how we are doing. We are all fine. The holidays are so so so hard. I want to buy Cameron something so badly. We just had a weekend of snow and I wished so hard that I would wake up and he would be asking could he go out and sled. We miss him!

Charli has been busy working, school and playing indoor lacrosse. We are going to Las Vegas again this year for Christmas. Charli and I are very excited. I really just wanted to be anywhere but here on Christmas morning. I feel like we cheat Charli out of the holiday because I don’t even feel like putting our little tree up. She doesn’t seem to mind. She still seems excited about the holiday (especially the 2 weeks off of school.)

I will pray that the holiday season brings some peace and comfort to those families having a hard time missing loved ones.

Thanks for checking in on us!

Sunday, November 2, 2008 6:22 AM CST

I know it's been a while. I still visit the site a lot to read past updates and just look at Cam's pictures.

We are all just moving along. It's not the same - we all seem to be missing something. Charli is still busy playing field hockey, she's doing well this season, scoring often. She continues to take my car OFTEN and seems to love her freedom. She just started working at a new 'Smoothie' place in our town. I'm not sure how she's going to do everything, but she seems to be able to just keep going.

Charles and I are just busy working - we seem to see each other in passing. I am taking classes two nights a week. I wonder how poor Cam would have been having to cook dinner!!! (He loved cooking.) He would have loved driving around with Charli.

I think this is going to be our year to get Cameron's foundation back on track.

Thanks for checking in on us!

Wednesday, September 3, 2008 5:24 PM CDT

School has started. Charli is in her Junior year. I am starting to panic already about the thought of her leaving! Everything seems to be going well so far. With the exception of a missed bus already (which may be a ploy to get a car) she seems pretty happy.

I am back at school and actually taking a class at night and Charles is anxiously awaiting Football season.

Cameron would have started Middle School this year. I can't imaging him any older than 8! I miss him EVERYDAY! I think about him all the time and still can't believe that he is not here.

We are all hanging in there. Thanks for continuing to check in, even though I don't update often. I still check the log though.

Sunday, August 3, 2008 10:14 PM CDT

We officially have three licensed drivers in our house!!! We are so proud that Charli passed her driving test with flying colors. No – there was no car waiting in the driveway for her and I have no idea when there will be. Charli got her license the day that the laws changed – the time increased from 30 days to six months to drive with a sibling in the car. All I could think was that Cameron would be so sad that she couldn’t drive him around for 6 months. I bet he would have marked on the calendar the first day he could ride with her. He loved and admired Charli so much!!!
We have been enjoying our summer. Charli has had a few Lacrosse Tournaments including one on Long Island this past weekend. Charli and I drove down and even though it ended early because of rain we had a lot of fun. Of course we went to visit the malls and had to make sure that the Targets on Long Island was the same as ours here.
I am doing some work on the foundation, our neighbor had his 40th birthday party last week and collected donations in lieu of gifts. He raised over $1000 for Cam’s foundation!!! What a special thing to do! Thanks Al!!!!
I will try to update more often.

Carla

Wednesday, July 9, 2008 10:51 PM CDT

July already. The summer is flying by.
We are relaxing and enjoying each other. Charli is working on that driving thing - soon she will be released to the public alone.

Charli has a lacrosse tourney in Syracuse this weekend and Charles and I both have previously scheduled commitments. I am so bummed that we can't be there. I am sure she will be fine on her own.

We decided to postpone the conference this year. I am very sad about it, but just couldn't get enough participation. I am hoping that it is just the poor economy and high gas prices. The flights are very high too. I hope that next year we are up and running.

I had to clean Cameron's room a little for guests. It was very hard and I hardly threw anything out. My mind tells me I need to get rid of it, donate it. My heart tells me keep it. Don't give away any memories.

Well, keep up in your prayers.

Thanks for continuing to check in on us!!!

Sunday, June 15, 2008 10:30 PM CDT

Happy Father's Day!
A special prayer goes out to all the dads that are missing their kids. I know it's hard.

Not much else is going on with us. I am trying really hard to plan the conference this year for the other families that have lost their child to this tumor. I miss all the families.

School ends soon - I'm not looking forward to sitting at home even though there are so many things that need to get done around here.

Charli hasn't figured out what she's doing this summer. She wants to work, but not really!!!!!

Cam would have been going to middle school - I can't imagine it. I miss him so much, nothing is complete without him.

Keep us in your prayers.

Carla

Monday, May 26, 2008 9:29 PM CDT

We had a beautiful weekend in CT. The weather was amazing. Friends came to visit from NJ and we had a lot of laughs. Cam would have been so happy with a house full of people.

I am really starting my planning for the next conference in August for the families that have lost their kids to this tumor. I keep finding more and reading their stories, each one just brings me right back to over 2 years ago. I can't believe it has been that long. Hell, I can't believe any of this has happened to us. I can't believe that Cameron has died. (boy writing that was hard!!)

It was a strange week because we used the song "With Hope" by Stephen Curtis Chapman (a Christian musician) for Cameron's slide show. It is a song about how we never thought this would happen and how we planned to be with him forever and now we have to beleive 'with hope' that we will see him again. Then this week his 5 year old daughter died in a tragic accident. Aweful irony!! It was just a strange week. The sermon at church was about how we remain faithful when tragedy strikes. Just trusting that there is some reason for Cameron leaving this earth so early and not being sad/angry that we have to go through life without him. Trusting in His will. Begging for understanding! Begging!!

On a lighter note...Charli is doing a great job driving. She is such a good girl. We are all hanging in there. Thanks for checking on us!!

Sunday, May 4, 2008 11:03 PM CDT

Happy Birthday Dude!!!!
We miss you so much!
Words just aren't enough. 11 years ago we were so blessed to have you in our lives.

Wednesday, April 16, 2008 8:42 PM CDT

Spring Break!
Charli and I are on spring break. Charles and I went to his work conference Friday until Tuesday. San Diego was beautiful. It was very nice and peaceful. I thought about Cameron soooooo much, I forgot what quiet time did. Charli spent a few days in Jersey with her friend Jen and now we are all back home, chillin'. I looked in updates and can't believe that was 3 years ago that we all took that wonderful trip to San Diego. Boy would I give anything to be back in that time.

Thanks for checking in on us. I am really going to start working more on the foundation so please keep checking in.

Carla

Saturday, March 29, 2008 1:18 PM CDT

We are all hanging in there! Missing our little buddy like crazy. All the signs of spring make us think about him. Wishing I were nagging him about homework and wearing a jacket and keeping his room clean. Wishing I were hugging him and hearing about his day at school and what he wants for his birthday. Wondering what he would look like now with big kid teeth and if he would have want to grow his hair out, would he still be skinny and like to walk around in his underwear. Would he still be good in math or found a new love in science or writing. I wonder if he would have grown out of SpongeBob and started watching MTV or something like that - I don't even know what almost 11 year olds watch on TV. Would he like girls or still just like to hang out with whoever was friendly. I hate having to freeze him in time - part of being a parent is watching them change - sharing in all the changes in their lives. We miss him so much.

Charli is doing great - she is getting a little practice behind the wheel. She is a much more agressive driver in the passenger seat than behind the wheel!(She's always wondering why people are going so slow- now she's not so pushy.)

Our scheduale, with Lacrosse everyday and Drivers Ed twice a week, is pretty busy. We have started the count down to summer vacation.

Thanks for checking in. Leave us a message.

Wednesday, March 12, 2008 10:04 PM CDT

I can’t believe I haven’t updated! This winter has been a little crazy. We are all doing well. Charli turned 16 on the 6th of this month. I can’t believe it. She is such a great daughter, we are so blessed. Spring sports start for her soon so I will really miss her being home in the afternoons – we love to hang out and run errands. She also got her learner’s permit!!!! She is so excited. She starts driving school tomorrow. Cameron would be so excited for her!!!
Charles is doing well also, I am sure that he is looking forward to possibly playing golf again. We have had so much snow here in CT it is ridiculous.
Charli and Charles spend a lot of time together playing guitar hero and rock band (video games). Seems so weird to me without Cam. I guess I have to just believe that he is there with them smiling.

Thanks for checking in on us!!! Keep our family and all the other families missing their kids in your prayers.

Sunday, February 3, 2008 0:05 AM CST

It seems like an eternity since we’ve seen our baby! Two years later and I still can’t believe he’s gone. So surreal! It’s so hard not to relive this day two years ago. I keep thinking, “What was the last thing I said. “ I’m sure I told him how much I loved him. I’m sure we all told him that. How are we supposed to go another 30 years with such a hole left in our hearts?
I can’t think of anything special to do today. I honestly want to forget that day.
Cam – we miss you! Our lives and our family will never be the same without you!

Wednesday, January 9, 2008 10:00 PM CST

Just a quick update. We are all doing well. Christmas was very nice. Charli came in to our room early and just wanted to lay down in our bed for a while ( which she doesn’t do often anymore). It was nice to have her there. Cam used to come in our bed all the time in the morning. We would wake up and he would just be there with his little butt in our face. Charli was very excited about all of her gifts. It was nice to see her so happy. She got Guitar Hero for Wii and she and Charles played it all day. The house was quiet and it was really tough, but we all survived. Later that week we went skiing with our good friends, it was nice as well. We went to Okemo, VT which is the first place we went snowboarding with Cam. The whole place made me think about him. I wonder if that is something that will ever change or get any easier.
So now we are into a new year. We are all back to work and school. Life is moving on – with or without Cameron.
Thanks for checking in!! Leave us a message.

Tuesday, December 25, 2007 1:01 AM CST

Merry Christmas! I know we haven’t updated in a while, but the season has kept us all pretty busy and updating just seems to bring me back to the reality of why we have a caringbridge page.
This is our second Christmas without Cameron – last year we were in Las Vegas so it wasn’t quite so real that Cam wouldn’t be here on Christmas. There were so many things that I saw that I know he would have liked –t hen I thought that it’s been almost two years and I have no idea how much he might have grown up. What things would he want? What would he look like? How tall would he be? Would he be a good student? All I know is that I bet he would still like to cuddle and he would still think Charli was the greatest. I bet he would still love to be around Charles doing ‘whatever’ and he would probably still make me coffee in the morning.
I can’t believe I’m living the ‘if’s. It still doesn’t seem real. It’s also so unbelievable that it’s been two years and we have so many more left to miss Cameron. Still seems so unfair. Still so incredible painful that I still can’t seem to verbalize it.
Charli seems so excited for Christmas – even at 15. I couldn’t bring myself to putting the tree up, but she put the little one up and made a list and tried to save money to buy me and Charles a gift. She is our blessing this season – like always.
I will work on updating more. There are so many more kids this year that passed on from this tumor – I pray that their families find some peace this season. Please say a prayer this season for all people that are missing someone ; that they are comforted knowing that they will meet again.

Wednesday, November 21, 2007 4:23 PM CST

Just a quick update. Boy ---are these holidays hard. Charli continues to be our driving force. Not sure what we would be doing without her. We are truly thankful for her!! I have no desire to sit around anyone’s family (including my own) when I feel like something is missing. That is what this holiday is about - Family. I will think about all the things to be thankful for this weekend. I know that we will have friends around and share some laughs. I will think of Cameron making sure I’m doing all the things I said I was going to do. ( He was always on top of me about something.) I will picture him eating a bunch of ham and think of all the good times and not focus on how much I miss him.
On another note. …It still amazes me that people check in on us, especially those going through trials themselves. I pray that God gives strength and comfort to all that need it.
Have a blessed and happy Thanksgiving.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007 10:02 PM CST

Thank you so much to all that keep checking in on us. It means a lot. Not too much is going on.

We are missing Cam so much as the holiday season approaches. They just aren't the same without him.

The Cameron Brooks Foundation just donated money to CCMC for new laptops. Cam loved having his own when he got there. There are just certian things that make that visit much easier. Me and memebers of the Board went to the hospital to give the check. It was a nice day. It was pretty ironic that the guy in charge of the hospitals foundation was Cameron's councelor when he was at Hole in The Wall Gang. What are the odds that the one week out of 12 and the one cabin out of 8 - Cameron was in his. He remembered him as soon as he saw me. He had great things to say about our little boy, but what else would I expect. He was so sweet. I can't believe he's gone. Lately I just keep thinking about how much different he would look now.

We miss him!
Thanks for checking in.

Charles, Carla & Charli.

Please say special prayers for a close friend of our family who was recently diagnosed with cancer. He's a great guy and has two sweet little girls.

Monday, October 8, 2007 9:37 PM CDT

Decided to do a quick update….Not to much is going on. Swim-Across-the-Sound had the Annual Smile a Mile for Cameron on Sunday 9/30. It was a very nice event. It really crept up on us though. The weather was BEAUTIFUL. I wished so badly that Cameron was there with us. There were so many old and new friends there!! It was great. Charli had so many friends there-we were so proud of her. We raised money that will be used to help families of children going through Cancer treatment. There are so many expenses other than medical costs.
Charli is very busy with school and Field Hockey. I’m not sure how she gets it all done. Charles is enjoying all the extra summer that we have playing golf whenever he can. I am busy with school and just trying to keep up with house stuff.
I haven’t been following too much but I’ve heard that we’ve lost quite a few more kids in this fight. It breaks my heart to think that parents have to wake up without their kids. It still seems so unreal to me.
We are hanging in there, not looking forward to the holidays. It’s so strange. All I know is it doesn’t get easier – I miss Cameron more and more each day.

Thursday, September 13, 2007 7:47 PM CDT

I was going to write how September is a difficult month because I think so much about Cameron going into 5th grade and how different he would have looked. How the pictures of the first day of school will just stop for him. Also I remember that fall-like Saturday that Cam and I were shopping and I noticed him limping - having no idea that the next morning our lives would be changed forever. I remember how normal everything was.
But then comes October, November, December and so on and so on. What is a good month anymore? I still sit in shock often wondering if this is real. I want to hug from Cam so badly. I want to hear him laugh. As you can tell - some times things just stink.

Charli has started the 10th grade. I can't believe it. She is playing field hockey again and doing very well. She is a hard worker.

Charles and I are both busy working. Nothing really new.
I promise to be better about updates.

Keep us in your prayers.

Carla

Monday, August 27, 2007 9:20 PM CDT

I know an update is long overdue. There has been a lot going on. August was good. Traveler’s Leadership Team had a golf tournament and the proceeds went to Cameron’s Foundation. There were over 200 people that participated. It was a really incredible day. I don’t think we could thank everyone enough for that. Cameron would have had so much fun. I thought about him all day. I guess I think about him everyday all day.

The next weekend was the DPG conference in Las Vegas. I was a little disappointed in the attendance, but when I got there it was so good to see everyone. I can’t believe how comforting those days were. The guest speaker was so good!! I wish I had videoed it and could listen to it everyday. Then we heard from my friend Tracy that talked about issues with the Medical Community. It was great – we were a little outraged, but it was just what we needed. We were so ready to make some changes. (That reminds me how much I should be doing). We decided that we need to get together and we set goals and were very productive. I was very pleased.
Charli has continued to stay busy. She finished Summer School (so she could get ahead) and has started field hockey practice. She starts school after Labor Day.
We took a mini trip to the beach with our friends the only vacation the three of us have taken (it’s hard to do family things without the whole family.)
Charles is still playing a lot of golf and I have gone back to work! I’m teaching at a high school here in CT. It was time. As much as I wanted to stay home and stay in the bed and attempt to stop life from moving on – it just wasn’t fair to anyone.
We are all missing Cameron. It’s been 18 months. I realized that we’ve lived in this house longer without him than with him. It is still so hard to believe. Life is not complete without him. He was such a part of our lives, even though he is still a part of our lives. Without his physical presence, we are just not complete.
Thank you all for checking in on us. I can’t believe that people still sign the guestbook. That means so much.
Please continue to pray for comfort.

Wednesday, July 25, 2007 4:48 PM CDT

Wow – what a long time to update. We are all doing ‘well’. There is a lot going on that is keeping up busy. Charli just finished summer school and field hockey camp. Charles is getting a lot of golf in and I am doing quite a bit of foundation related work. The Travelers Golf Tournament is August 3. I’m only doing little things for that, but just because this is all new to me, it’s time consuming. I’m also working on the conference for families that lost their kids to the same tumor again this year. I can’t wait to see everyone. The program will include people that will help us look at our situation in different views. It’s so hard to believe how many ways this affects your life.

I can’t believe there are still people that stop by to visit and leave messages!! That just warms my heart. Cameron was (is) such a special person.

Sunday, June 24, 2007 5:05 PM CDT

Updates seem to come fewer and further between. Time continues to go on with or without our little buddy.

Charli finished her first year of high school. We are so proud of her. This was the end of the first full year that Cameron missed - he totally missed fourth grade. It's still so unbelievable that he’s gone. I know he would look so different now.

Charli left for lacrosse camp in Maryland and flew by herself for the first time. I was so worried, but of course she did great. I miss her so much already. The house is so empty without her. I just think that people don’t appreciate how lucky they are to have the hectic schedules with their kids and all the joys that come along it. I miss Charli and she’s been gone for two days…. I can’t write to describe how much I miss Cam.

There are a few things going on this summer that I really need to focus my time on – there is a major golf tournament that the proceeds will go to Cameron’s foundation (he would be so proud), there is the 2nd annual DPG conference and we are trying to work with the local hospital CCMC as part of the foundation goals. I guess I really need prayers because I am still finding it hard to continue his legacy because it just seems more real that he’s gone. I need to learn to look at life in a different way – I desperately need to align my heart with my mind.

Please leave a message and thanks for continuing to check on us!!!!

Sunday, June 3, 2007 2:00 PM CDT

An update!!!!

For some reason I like these pictures better so I put them back up. I think it’s because I remember the day that each one was taken on. I can’t believe he’s been gone almost as long as he lived in this house. When will we be able to change his room or take his coat out of the coat closet? I’m sure there is something healing in doing that, but I know we are not ready. I also know one thing… it does not get easier. I still find the whole thing so hard to believe. I want to just hug Cameron so bad. I just want him to come home and tell me about his day. I want to rub his back to put him to sleep. He loved that. I love him and miss him.

The rest of us are fine. Everything is moving on like life normally does, it seems so unfair. I’ve been doing a lot of work for the foundation and for the conference in August. I just seem to stay busy. Charli is finishing up with lacrosse; she had a great season and getting ready for the summer. She is going to a few sports camps, then summer school to get a little ahead (by her own choice). Then I’m not sure what we will do for August.

Thanks for continuing to check in on us.

Saturday, May 5, 2007 6:59 AM CDT

Happy Birthday to our baby boy!!! It’s so hard to believe it was 10 years ago that Cameron came into our lives. It seems like yesterday. I remember he wore one of my favorite outfits home from the hospital, it used to be Charli’s. Cameron was such an easy baby. I really think too easy. I remember taking him everywhere with me and Charli, including her first day of kindergarten when he was only 4 months old. We sure miss him.

There was a DVD drive for the Children’s Hospital in memory of Cameron at his elementary school. It was so hard going up there to pick them up, but I just kept thinking about how happy he was to watch a movie while he was in treatment and how proud he was to bring all the ones he collected for his 8th birthday. Boy, we miss him. I was fine at school until I saw some of his classmates, they are all a foot taller and look so different with adult teeth. The whole world continues to move on without him, it’s really not fair and very painful.

On a good note, Charli scored a goal on Friday!!!! We both laughed in the car, because we know Cameron would have been screaming maybe even crying. It’s just so hard to explain how much he admired her. She’s doing very well. She went to New Jersey, I have no idea how she’s doing today, but my guess is she will stay too busy to think about it.

It continues to amaze me how many people continue to keep us in their thoughts and prayers! I can’t believe that people remember his birthday. It really makes me smile.

Again, Happy Birthday Cameron!!! We love you and miss you!!!

Tuesday, May 1, 2007 8:29 PM CDT

I just keep thinking if Cameron were still here I would be calling around to see who could come over for his party or I could schedule something somewhere. I always waited until the last minute. I would call and see what I could get express mailed from Oriental Trading or Birthday Express to arrive by Friday. Cam never seemed to mind, he was so easy going.

Tuesday, April 17, 2007 8:34 PM CDT

I think we are missing the ‘spring’ part of spring break. Actually Charli is on Spring Break, mine was last week. She’s in NJ and this house is so lonely without her. My laptop is not working so I’m sitting in the bed at nights just thinking and it really stinks. The computer and the TV usually keep my mind a little occupied. I could play video games until I’m too tired to think about how much I miss Cameron.

Today I’m avoiding the TV because of the devastation in Virginia. They keep commenting on how these parents will never see their children again and that is just a feeling that you never want someone to have. I hurt for them. I worry about how easy life can change, how little control we have over that. Only thing we can control is how we react and some days, I’m not too sure how much I can control that. I know that my faith helps me and the hope that this life is just the prelude for eternal life.

Thanks for checking in. Please keep us in your prayers as well as all the parents missing their kids – due to diffuse ponitine gliomas, all types of cancer, and all types of tragedies. It’s contrary to the divine order; it’s a parent’s worst nightmare that they have to live through everyday. It’s that everyday part that is probably the hardest, not just today, but tomorrow and the day after that. It stinks. OK – I’m getting bitter…just say a prayer for us!

Leave us a note!

Monday, April 9, 2007 8:34 PM CDT

Happy Easter! It doesn’t quite feel like Easter or spring here in CT, it’s really cold. We had a very nice weekend though. We had a distant relative visit, he’s 17 and it was nice to have someone hang out with us. Cam would have be so happy to have someone in his room. He loved to share his room (except he like to be in there with them). I can’t believe how empty the house still seems and Cameron really wasn’t loud.
Charli is going away next weekend; it’s going to be really quiet then.

We have so many things going on with the foundation and the DPG conference and a golf tournament coming up. I promise to work on keeping everyone posted.

Please keep us in your prayers, thanks for checking in.

Monday, March 26, 2007 7:50 PM CDT

Sorry for the delay in updating. I have no real excuse except that we are busy and there isn’t much to report. Charli is playing Lacrosse, Charles has been gone on business and about to go away again. I am busy with work and house projects. I’m really trying to get focused and concentrate on Cameron’s foundation. We are all staying busy. Everyone says that helps, but I think it just distracts you. I can’t believe how much time has passed, I miss Cameron as much as I did February 3, 2006 at 9:45am - more in some ways. Everything reminds me of him. I celebrated my birthday yesterday and we went out to dinner on Saturday – I hate that tables are set for four and then they come take one of the place settings away. I just want to tell them to keep it there – there is another member of our family. Every time we laughed I wished he were there. I think my weekend was almost perfect with the exception of Cameron missing.
I’ve been reading this book with a book group and it’s about this guys’ life and his spirituality. It gets a little strange, but it makes me think so much. The author was talking about when you are in love how selfless you are – how you think of that person needs before your own. All I could think about was how wonderful Cameron’s last 16 months were and I’m sure that part of that was because I was focused on his needs – not mine. (and so were so many other people) Now I miss him so much and I just feel like no one understands and they have just moved on (I know there aren’t any other choices), and I’m focused on myself. If I don’t learn a lesson from all of this, Cameron’s life and his struggle were in vein. I spend so much time thinking about everything. I think that is part of the reason I don’t update as often – journaling brings out feelings that are sometimes easier kept inside. I pray everyday that God leads me to peace and each day I get a few moments of it – sometimes I don’t realize it until it’s over, but I thank Him for it when I do. I try my hardest to be thankful for all the things that I do have (especially Charli) and the things that I did have (especially Cameron); and not focus on the sad things. It is so hard.

Well, for those of you that asked for an update…this is what you get - my personal struggles. For those of you that didn’t ask for an update…this is what you get!! The same thing – sorry!

I am still having the conference in August for other families that are on this DPG grieving journey – I can’t wait to meet some of the new families whose kids I have been following as well.

Thanks for checking in – please leave us a message.

Sunday, March 25, 2007

Happy Birthday Carla!!!!!
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Tuesday, March 6, 2007

Today is Charli's 15th Birthday!!!!

Happy Birthday to our little girl! I can't believe it's been 15 years since that morning in Fayetteville, NC.

I felt so bad that I sent her out to catch the bus on her birthday when it was zero degrees. Nice birthday gift! She actually didn't even want much but to have her friends come over and have her favorite foods. Oh - she wanted a pinata. A friend had one at a party and she loved it. (Yes some 15 year olds like pinatas.) All I could think all day was how happy Cameron would be to be sitting downstairs with all of Charli's friends and then getting a whack at that pinata. Boy do I wish he was here!!!

Well, thanks for checking in!! Keep all the families that are missing their kids and all the families that are battling this tumor (and all types of illnesses) in your prayers.

Tuesday, February 27, 2007 7:53 AM CST

I can’t believe it’s been so long since I’ve updated. I check the page so everyday for guests and often read past updates and look at the pictures. Unfortunately there is not much to update. Charles had to work during our winter break so Charli and I took a vacation to Florida to visit some relatives and get some heat. It was a wonderful trip. We were so excited to go without coats and ride with the window down. It’s so nice to spend time with family. Our cousin Shani spoiled us in Miami and then my cousin Tyler spoiled us in Okeechobee. We also got to spend some time in New Jersey with friends – it was a nice trip. We took a one day cruise to the Bahamas (we were only there for 2.5 hours) and it was so beautiful. We just sat on the beach and I don’t know what Charli was thinking, but I was wishing that Cameron could have seen that. I just kept thinking that Heaven must be more beautiful than that and he is so happy. We both missed Charles and are glad we are home.

Yesterday we had a snow storm here in CT and it was absolutely beautiful as well. It was perfect snowman snow. Every yard had adorable snowmen and it just made me miss Cam like crazy yesterday – all the kids were playing outside. It reminded me how happy he was when we moved here. I still feel obsessed with losing him and staying busy keeps me just that, busy. It doesn’t make it any easier. Charli’s birthday is coming up and I just sit and think that she will be going off to college soon and wonder if Cam & I would have gotten to be as close as Charli and I are. There is a special bond between mother & son and I miss it.

Thanks for checking in!!!! Sign the guestbook.

Monday, February 12, 2007 8:46 AM CST

The anniversary is over. People were so thoughtful. Now we are back into our routine of going on with our lives pretending that everything is OK. It still just doesn’t feel right and I still wake up every morning thinking about whether this is all a dream and Cam is in his bed. I’m not sure what the second year holds for us with out Cameron, but I just don’t understand how it could get any easier, just more real.

Keep us in your prayers.

Saturday, February 3, 2007 2:58 PM CST

I really meant to update earlier today. Wow – this is really hard. I can’t believe I have nothing planned and I honestly feel like yesterday held so many memories because Cameron died on a Friday. I spent the whole year thinking about firsts without Cam and this whole week I keep reliving various last – last thing I said to him, he said to me, last smile, last meal… it’s not been good. I am so thankful for the people that have called to try to create a diversion, it has helped.

I guess only thing I ask people to do is in some way memorialize Cameron this weekend. I tried to think of some of the wonderful traits that he had and just hope that when you do something this weekend you try to be like him.

1) Cameron enjoyed the small things. It was so easy to bring him to laughter. We often played the “I bet you will smile by the time I count to 5” game that my father played with me and sure enough – Cameron could never make it, all he needed was one silly look and he laughed. He laughed at commercials, tv shows or anything that was the least bit funny. I often don’t think we put forth the effort to enjoy being silly. Do something silly for Cameron today, even if it’s a crazy dance that is totally out of characteristics to you. He was silly and loved being around silly people.

2) Cameron admired people. He loved to hear about different things people could do or things that they’ve done. He was so easy to impress. I remember thinking how this was not a good trait – I thought he was never going to be able to see through people’s stories and eventually get taken advantage of. If you told Cameron that you could do something – he believed you and admired you for it with no doubt. He thought people were great and their little tricks were great – whether it was twirling a baton, or doing a skateboard jump or just being older. You were cool.

3) He told you when you hurt him or when you made him feel good. (If you said something just the least bit negative - he would tell you that you hurt him on the inside – boy did that drive us crazy. We used to say - So what! Get over it.) What a great trait – he didn’t hold it in – he didn’t hold his good feelings in either. If he loved you – he told you. If he thought you were pretty – he told you. If he liked your eyebrows – he would sure mention it. He would notice if I parted my hair differently.

4) Cameron didn’t care who you were, if you were playing with him you were his friend (unless you were 2 – he didn’t care too much for toddlers for some reason). If you were his friends’ cousin, you might as well been his cousin. He didn’t care if you were a child or an adult. He loved to be around you.

5) Cameron didn’t need to be in charge. He was often happy just being there. He was never in the circle in soccer – he would just wait on the outside of the pack and if the ball came – he kicked it (Ok – maybe that was because he just wasn’t very competitive.) If it was his turn to pick something – he would often ask your opinion. He would go skating, even if he couldn’t skate, just because Charli wanted to go. He enjoyed watching her. It didn’t need to be all about him.

6) Cam didn’t mind just being there. He would sit in the room with his dad and watch whatever was on or play by himself. He would have friends over and they could just be playing their own games and be content. He could tell when you needed time and go do something else, but was fine just knowing that you are there. (This was very convenient when he was a baby and I would sneak in short naps!) Actually he was a very content child -

I think that Cameron kinda got something about life that we some how lose with different experiences. We are here to enjoy life and not let things get in our way. We inhibit some pleasures because they leave us vulnerable. Cameron enjoyed people & life without those worries – without being competitive, envious or proud. He figured out that he didn’t need those things to get through each day. I guess the whole point of this is that he was an amazing little boy and I (we) miss him so much. I know that he made such a difference in our lives and other peoples’ lives – not just by dying, but by living.

OK – off my soap box .

I hope and pray that Cameron is having a great time and that he knows how much we love him. Unfortunately I think that he’s pretty busy this week as part of the welcoming committee for the children with a DPG (diffuse pontine gliomas) – this earth has lost three lovely kids. Please pray for their families – it’s a tough road.

Thanks to all the people that have called, left messages, sent notes, sent gifts, gave hugs, decorated trees and just let us know you are thinking about us. It really means so much.

Tuesday, January 30, 2007 9:53 PM CST

Boy that 1 year is coming quickly. I'm not sure if I know what difference it really makes, however I am seriously contemplating something to memorialize him. Something to recognize how special his life was. Just not sure what..... very hard to plan what to do for the one year anniversary of your child's death. It kinda stinks! Please check back in.

Thursday, January 11, 2007 9:24 PM CST

We are all hanging in there, just going on with our lives. I can’t believe it’s been almost a year since I’ve kissed my baby. I miss him so much, it still physically hurts. I would give ANYTHING to have him back, just cuddle one more night. (I know that wouldn’t be enough.)

Friday, December 29, 2006 8:51 PM CST

We are back safe & sound. Las Vegas was a great distraction. Christmas went by like any other day. We had a great time – our hotel was beautiful. We did a helicopter tour of the Grand Canyon and the view was beautiful. I kept thinking Cameron would be scared, but deep in my heart I know he would have loved it. He would have been as amazed by the view just as we were, probably even more than us because he always appreciated things like that. I kept thinking that maybe he gets to see all of the world. I’m not sure what I think about Heaven anymore –it’s been really tough, but I have to hope that he gets to witness God’s beauty all day, every day.

It was really crowded there – almost all the stores were open for Christmas and we saw the Blue Man Group. It was so funny. We all laughed so much. I thought that Cameron would have not liked Vegas, but I thought of him throughout the whole show – He would have LOVED it. I wish we had taken him to see it. He thought Lion King on Broadway was wonderful (he was only 5) and wanted to see it again. I wish we had taken him again. We ate dinner at the top of the Stratosphere (a really tall building) and got on the rides. Now I know Cameron would never have done that – we were laughing talking about Cameron wouldn’t even have let us go on those rides. We were reminiscing about our vacation to Disney in 2002 and other tips how Cameron just didn’t like rides. He really didn’t even want us to get on them.

Some of Charles' family joined us out there and we got to spend the day together, it was nice. Now we are back and I’m trying to plan our next trip.

I’m really going to start focusing on Cameron’s foundation and the next DPG family conference.

Thanks for checking in and please keep us in your prayers.

Thursday, December 21, 2006 8:15 PM CST

Again not too much to update. Christmas is coming and Charli is getting pretty excited. Everyday I think about what I would be getting Cameron for Christmas and how excited he would be. Actually Cameron was pretty patient and even when we offered wouldn’t want to open his presents until Christmas. That used to drive Charli crazy – we were just laughing about it.

Charles and I were presented at Travelers with a check from the group that held the fundraiser for Cameron’s foundation as their management project. They donated over $1000! Cameron would have pretended to faint if he were here (he loved to do that.) Especially when he saw that they gave us a really big check. We were very proud and Cameron would have been as well. Thank you so much!

My brother is home from Iraq this week. It was great to hear his voice. He is so excited to pick out a Christmas tree with his kids.

We are hanging in there. We can’t wait to get to Las Vegas - it will be a great distraction.

I am constantly thinking about all the families I met in the past two years and in Vegas that are spending Christmas with so many memories to replace actual events - so many 'ifs' and 'would haves'. It seems so selfish to find comfort in not being alone, but I find these families so comforting.

Well, keep us in your prayers and have a joyous and safe holiday! Thank you for checking in – if I don’t update next week - have a happy new year.

Sunday, December 3, 2006 2:48 PM CST

10 months and I still can't believe it.

Charli is counting down the days until our trip to Vegas. I think we all are. We are finally getting some cold weather here in CT, it's kind of refreshing. Even though I don't like the cold, it's nice to have a change of season.

Not much else to report..I plan to get cards out this week; which will be tough. Actually, everything is tougher!

Please keep us in your prayers as well as all the others that need it this season. Please leave a note to let us know you're still checking in!

Friday, November 24, 2006 9:16 PM CST

Happy Thanksgiving. Yesterday was a long day; the holiday is about friends and family. I am so thankful for our family. I just wish that we were all here like we are supposed to be – special days like this just seem to add salt to the wound. I wonder what Cameron is doing, I doubt that they need a special day to say thanks, I bet they are thankful and celebrate everyday. It was very laid back – just the three of us.

Now we are really into the Christmas season, all the shopping and the decorations. I know that I’m missing the point of Christmas, but I’m missing Cameron so much that it’s what I focus on. I honestly think he just loved the joy that is a part of the season - the parties, the decorations, the commercials and the music. People are different during this season, even those that don’t celebrate Christmas. Everyone seems to be looking forward to something, maybe just the time off from work or the day to rest- not just getting presents, but shopping to get someone something that will make them happy. It is a joyous time of the year and it just won’t be the same without him.

We are all hanging in there. Not sure what I’m going to do for a Christmas card this year, not even sure how to sign them. I guess that will be my project in the next few weeks to come up with something creative.

Keep us in your prayers!

Friday, November 24, 2006 9:10 PM CST

Wednesday, November 15, 2006 10:20 PM CST

I’ve been meaning to do an update. There isn’t much going on here. We are all staying busy. We’ve had some great days lately – not really sunny, but very mild. I picture Cameron playing outside all the time and me fussing at him to do his homework. We all miss him so much. I constantly keep seeing the commercial for Happy Feet, Cameron would be so excited to see that. I picture him trying to do the dance and repeating the commercial. I just feel like he’s missing so much. We are missing so much. I just really want to know what he’s doing. This is so strange!

I am so thankful for the people around us, old friends and new; especially the wonderful families that have lost children that are constantly there for me to talk to.

Thanks for the guestbook notes. I love to hear from so many people that I’m glad are still checking in on us.

There are three really cute kids this world recently lost to this tumor. I haven’t really been checking on kids since Cameron died because it’s so painful to relive, but I’m catching up. Please pray for their families – this journey sucks (I didn’t really feel like using a more appropriate word.)

Charli is done with Field Hockey and so happy to get home early. She was joking about us being able to spend more time together now and I know she was joking, but I’m pretty excited!

Wednesday, November 1, 2006 1:05 PM CST

November is here already. I can’t believe it’s been almost 9 months since Cameron left us. Actually I can’t believe that any of this has ever happened. During the day I think Cameron is at school and in the evenings he’s in his room. Days like yesterday present a problem with that denial tactic. Even though Cam didn’t like Halloween, he would have been so excited with all the festivities and seeing his friends costumes. It is a great day for kids. Charli was tired after practice and didn’t even trick or treat. (I know she’s 14 and shouldn’t be trick or treating anyway.) It was a hard day. I’m learning that I can try so hard to tell myself that something won’t bother me or I’m OK with something, but when it comes down to it, it hurts really bad. I miss Cameron and there is nothing I can do to change that or make me feel any better.

Our house continues to stay a little busy. Grumpa came up for the weekend and Charli had about 12 of her friends from the field hockey team over. (With a little excitement, but I won’t get into that at this time.) The girls were great - so friendly and respectful.

Not much else to report.

Keep us in your prayers!

Monday, October 23, 2006 12:47 AM CDT

Finally an update…. Sometimes I don’t like to update about us, because I always feel like this is Cameron’s page. However, I do know that our friends and family care about how we are doing. Over all, I think we are doing well. We have been really blessed with so many amazing people in our lives, those we knew before Cameron’s fight and those we met after. God’s grace still amazes me. The last few weekends have just shown me that grace by the people that are in our lives and the joy that they bring. I saw former students and teachers from NJ, old work friends, old neighbors and my friend from CA and each hug was just like a piece of me being put back together. I almost feel like after losing Cameron, the whole puzzle fell apart, not just his piece. I have changed but through the people in our lives over the last nine months I can see the sun peaking through the dark clouds. (The sun just popped through as I was typing that!!! Really strange!) I still struggle with ”Why Cameron?”, “Why us?” and still feel that it really wasn’t fair and want to hold him and see him smile again, but I know that there is still so much pleasure in our lives and we are truly blessed.

We talk about Cameron so much. What he would have said or done when something happens. He was such a happy camper – especially in the last 16 months of his life. He just embraced everything. I just started visiting this new church and the pastor was asking what could they do for kids with cancer…people did so much for us, things I never would have imagined, but creating those opportunities to create memories is the best thing. You get so wrapped up in treatment and/or finding a cure that people have to stop and make you enjoy each day. Cameron couldn’t wait to see who was coming to visit or what we were doing on the weekend….those dinners that people brought over, mini golf, the movies, snow mobiling, the gifts, the games – the people that came over to play uno and connect four faithfully. Those are things that I think about often. He was so happy. Okay, I’m not sure where I was going with that, but I was just having happy memories so you all had to join in!

Charles and Charli are both doing well. We are planning our Christmas in Vegas and I think we are all excited about it. Honestly, Cameron probably would not have liked Vegas. That makes me feel better about being there without him. Charli can’t wait!

I have been slowly stumbling across other kids that are currently in their battle with this tumor. So please pray for those families, heck pray for families in general.

Thanks for checking in!

Monday, October 9, 2006 7:24 PM CDT

Again more beautiful days in Connecticut, the foliage is amazing. Sometimes I just look around and wonder if this is what Heaven looks like.

Charli is doing well. She is such a joy, even when she's not in her normal chipper moods. She is the glue that holds us right now. She is doing very well in school and works really hard when she's playing field hockey. We are so proud of her.

Charles' grandmother passed away last Tuesday, he joined his family in Richmond, VA for her service on Friday.

Charles, Charli and I went to Chili's on Saturday for the first time with just the three of us. Cameron was definitely missing. It just didn't seem right without him hogging the queso dip. It was strange, but they put us at a table with only one chair on one side so it wasn't as obvious as having an empty chair. We did have quite a few laughs. I hope and pray that he is able to see us and laugh with us.

Not much else is going on. It's still so quiet in our house. I'm trying not to think about the holidays, but a few of the stores (Lowe's is one) already have their Christmas decorations up. Cameron would have been so excited. He couldn't care less about Halloween or Thanksgiving - Christmas was his holiday.

I have so many special prayers - one of Cameron's very special friends' mom needs to have a biopsy of a mass and they are very worried and there is a lot going on with my brother in Iraq. I just want him home.

Please continue to pray for our family! Thank you so much for the notes - they really make me smile.

Monday, October 2, 2006 4:35 PM CDT

Just thought I would do a quick update. Not too much to report. We are missing Cameron A LOT around here. We talk about him so much. I think we are all still in disbelief that he is actually gone. It’s still so surreal. Charli is staying busy in school. She continues to be an amazing kid. Charli had friends sleep over this weekend and a visitor from NJ and I just thought about how happy Cameron was when all ‘their’ friends were around. He thought they were just as much his friends as hers. He loved having a house full of girls. He was really such a great laid-back kid.

Charles’ grandmother in Richmond is not doing so well, so please keep her and their family in your prayers.

Tuesday, September 26, 2006 10:58 AM CDT

The Smile-A-Mile was really nice. There were a few raindrops, but the serious rain held off for us. There were about 200 people there. Charli & the freshman field hockey team came in uniform. I was so proud of them. They were very cute. There was a team from CCMC, the children’s hospital where Cameron used to go. It was so good to see them, they have no idea how much they meant to Cam & I. They made the visits so easy. Cameron’s Physical & Occupational therapist were there as well. There were a lot of people from Cameron’s school and friends and ‘family’. Aaron Baral’s family came, he’s currently in treatment for leukemia at the hospital, I’m sure they had other things to do so we really appreciated it. Ben, a little boy around Cameron’s age with a brain tumor that we shared the chemo room with on Fridays was there with his family. We had hot dogs, pop corn & cotton candy, balloons & clowns! It was amazing. Next year it will even be bigger. Thank you so much to Mitch & Kelli for all your hard work. We hope that you find the perfect family to help this year. Finances should not be something that is on your mind while your child is battling cancer.

That first lap without Cameron was really tough, but so many people there made it easier. I really didn’t feel alone! I know Charli didn’t feel alone with her team there and Charles seemed to be handling it very well also.

Not much to report. The weather in Connecticut continues to be beautiful. The nights are incredible as well - if you get a chance to walk outside when its dark do so. We have had these 74 degree sunny days here and the leaves are turning, yet still green. I keep hearing people refer to things ‘like Heaven’ or ‘heavenly’. It has such a different meaning to me now. Cameron used to love playing outside. I remember when he saw his school in CT his first reaction was they had two playgrounds and when we visited his class and he saw one right outside Mrs. Clarks class, I’m sure he thought that was heaven. I hope that he has free time to play with the other children. One of our friends had a dream that Cameron was playing and he had on sneakers. I can’t help but laugh because Cameron really didn’t want to go to church because he didn’t like ‘Church Shoes.’ So I was comforted to imagine him wearing his sneakers up there.

Please, please keep us in your prayers as well as all the families that struggle with days without their child. Leave us a message!

Tuesday, September 19, 2006 10:03 AM CDT

The 2nd Annual Smile-A-Mile for Cameron in on Sunday. Swim Across the Sound
The sound has been very good to us; they help cancer patients and their families in so many ways including paying bills if necessary. Cameron loved going to their events, they always made him feel really special. Last year at the Smile-A-Mile Cameron sat in this big blow up Sponge Bob chair. He was treated like a king and gave autographs. We hope that this event will continue to grow every year and be one of their big fund raisers. If the link above doesn’t work – go to www.swimacrossthesound.org

It will be so hard without him there. Last year, Cam took the first lap on Charles shoulders. The tumor was back and walking was difficult for him. His hand was shaky and he signed peoples’ shirts even though it was hard for him. He didn’t turn anyone away. I know it’s been almost 8 months, but I still can not believe that he’s gone. We miss him so much.

Charli is getting all settled into high school. She loves playing field hockey. She takes it very seriously. She looks really cute in her kilt. She passes out every night after 2 hours of practice and hours of homework. She hasn’t seen CSI in weeks.

We had a great visit with my brother, who is back in Iraq now. Please pray for his safe return. Actually we didn’t see him much, but we did get to spend time with other friends from Maryland that we haven’t seen in a while. We really had a chance to laugh and have fun. It’s so hard to explain how you can still enjoy life with Cameron on your mind constantly. It’s strange – un-freakin’-believable.

I’ve been missing all the families that I met in Las Vegas and the others I’ve become friends with over the years. I just want to call them all the time. I wish we could get together more often. I’ve been trying to slowly pack up some of Cameron’s things, it is so hard, but keeping them here does nothing for us, especially things like clothes. I’ve found it helpful when I give them to someone that I think Cameron would have loved to have.

Well, please keep us in your prayers. If you are in the Hartford area – come to the walk!

Thursday, September 7, 2006 6:13 AM CDT

School is off to a good start for Charli. She loves playing field hockey, but not enjoying the pace of high school. She doesn't like her classes too much, but I think she's adjusting very well.

Nothing to report in our house, it's very lonely during the day so I have accelerated my job search. It's hard to jump right back into my old life, it's not the same. I can't believe how much I think about Cameron. Everything makes me miss him.

Cameron's plaque is on the rock at his school now. I keep trying to make it there to check it out, but drive by and just don't want to stop. I think I just want to stop when no one is there.

My brother is home from Iraq so we are going to Maryland to visit him this weekend. I hate flying without Cameron. I used to love how people would always comment on how good my kids were. If we had two and two seats, we used to sit boys together and girls together..things were so perfect. I sure hope I appreciated them.

The smile-a-mile for Cameron is September 24th - I will post a link over the weekend.

Please keep us in your prayers. Pray that God finds some way to comfort us and all the families missing their kids.

Monday, August 28, 2006 10:55 AM CDT

Not much to update. Time is still moving so slowly. I’m just following up on job stuff and sending emails and I swear every time I look at the clock it’s the same time it was before. Even when I’m busy time just creeps.

We went to my cousin Kristi & Tim’s wedding and instead of favors they made a donation to the Cameron Brooks Foundation! How awesome it that! They had little place cards on every plate. It’s strange – I was so happy to see him where ever I went, but couldn’t stop thinking about how cute he was when he had to get dressed up.

September is slowly approaching and boy is it hard. Charli and I went school shopping and I saw so many things that Cameron would have loved. He was really into school supplies (Mrs. Clark can attest to that!) He actually liked anything with a character on it. The last two Septembers were pretty rough – diagnosis in 2004 and recurrence in 2005. This will be the first year of those 1st day of school pictures without Cameron. Even when he wasn’t in school he always ended up in the pictures. Actually Charli and I always laugh because when we look at pictures it’s like a “Where’s Waldo?” because you will always find Cameron in the background. Usually – her and all her friends and Cam just there hanging around. I will have to find some of those and post them.

Charli starts high school on Thursday. She’s such an great kid, Charles and I are so lucky to have her. She’s going to play field hockey. I feel like I did her first day of kindergarten and they made the parents leave and I snuck back to school just to watch her through the window. I haven’t figured out how I’m going to do that now though.

Well, please continue to check on us and please sign the guest book.

Friday, August 18, 2006 0:34 AM CDT

I can’t believe I haven’t updated. Charli spent a week in NJ and Charles was on a business trip. The house was very lonely. Saturday, the 12th, we had a cookout to celebrate Charles’ birthday (I won’t mention which one, but it’s more than 39 and less than 41). It was a beautiful day, the weather was perfect and it was so nice to see so many of his friends. Grand Carol and Grandpa Tally flew in on Friday - it was a really nice party. Our friends from Jersey drove up and we sat around late talking trash – it was like old times.

I’m not sure if I mentioned, but I planned a ‘gathering’ in Las Vegas this past week for other families that I’ve met over the internet that had a child die from the same tumor that Cameron had. It really started out just to meet a few people that I kept in touch with, but it ended up so much more. There were 11 children’s families represented! It was very nice. Aunt Toni did a lot of work and we met at Bally’s for three days. It was very emotional, but absolutely comforting. We had two speakers – Tom Zuba (www.tomzuba.com) spoke to us about grief and transformation. It was an open forum and I think we all were captivated and plan to put his advice in practice. He told us that we had to actively participate in the transformation. He told us that we can still lead a very happy life even though our child died. He loved that we all got to talk about our kids and share our story. He was very helpful and funny. Then we heard from Tim Hayden (www.jthf.org) , his son Jeff died from a diffuse pontine glioma in 2004. He’s doing a lot with the foundation he set up for his son and is using what he has learned to help us all. Next he shared with all of us about something that he is creating to help families whose children are diagnosed so that they can go to one place for information rather then search all over like we all had to do. We were all very excited.

You can go to www.jthf.org and click on photos and videos and see the slide show of all the kids that Aunt Toni put together.

I can’t express how absolutely amazing the families were. We were all the same, yet different and it was comforting. I felt like I knew their kids and they knew Cameron. We cried and laughed, but mostly laughed. Tom told us when we find something that makes us happy do more of it – so we ate, drank and gambled and laughed. We actually had $10 extra from everyone throwing in money for one of our bar tabs and Noah’s grandma put it in a slot machine and we won $66!!! We cheered so loud it drew a crowd (I think they thought we won a lot of money – not $66). We laughed all night. We used it to add bagels to our breakfast the next morning. It was a lot of fun. I can’t wait until next year.

Well, this weekend my cousin, Kristi gets married so I get to see family and my brother comes home from Iraq on Monday for 2 weeks. I have to figure out how to get down to Maryland. Then Charli starts school.

Thanks to Chris (Jake’s mom) for the help with the conference logo. Everyone loved it. That was something else that we all had in common was how remarkable everyone has been, offering what ever they could.

Please keep us in your prayers. We miss Cameron more than we could ever imagine. It’s just not fair.

Thursday, August 3, 2006 3:22 PM CDT

Charli and I are in Maryland. Charli is in Track and Field Camp all day at Univ. of Md. Charles is still in CT working. It's very hard here with all his cousins running around without him.

It's been the longest 6 months of my life. We all miss him so much - still hard to believe.

Wednesday, July 26, 2006 11:53 PM CDT

Time is just ticking by very slowly. We continue to stay busy. Charli just came home from field hockey camp. She had a great time. She thought everything was amazing, even though she was so sore. She can’t wait to play during the school year. When she was gone, I missed her like crazy. Her friend Jenn is here all week from New Jersey so she’s very happy. Charles has been really busy at work and playing golf quite a bit.

Cameron is constantly on our minds. We all miss him like crazy, it’s so unfair.

I was thinking about how just 2 years ago the moving van came to get all of our stuff and we were all so excited to be starting this new chapter in our lives. We were excited about everything, the new house, new school and the fact that Charles wouldn’t be traveling and he’d be home every night. I had a job lined up and the only concern I had was that the kids get out early on Wednesdays and I had no idea what to do about childcare. I guess what I have learned from these last two years is that we have very little control over what happens in our lives. We can choose our careers, or where to live or whether to have kids, but nothing is guaranteed and you never know what the next day will bring. I never realized that I’m not writing this book called my life; I am just one of the many characters. I have hope and pray that the next chapters bring some comfort. What’s funny is that I know how the book ends; we all do (at least the earthy part). I just never expected Cameron to not be in the rest of my book, at least physically. I’m not saying that we don’t have choices, of course we do, but we don’t have control of outcomes that I always thought we had.

Overall, we are all generally still happy; there is just this incompleteness to the happiness. We are so blessed with family and friends, we are all healthy and don’t have a lot of other issues.

Please keep us in your prayers, we are about to hit 6 months since we’ve held our son. It feels like an eternity.

Tuesday, July 11, 2006 11:07 PM CDT

I hope I don’t start to lose people checking in since I don’t update very frequently. I still check the guestbook everyday and I still go back to last years entries to remember how happy we were and what we were doing at that time. I wish that I had journaled all of my life. I’ve forgotten so much.

Time is still creeping here to me. Charli and I have been pretty busy not doing much. The fourth weekend was very nice. My mother, sister and my two nieces came for a week. We went to six flags and the pool and the mall. The girls had so much fun playing with the kids in our neighborhood. That was one of Cameron’s favorite things to do. He loved this neighborhood. He couldn’t wait to get out and ride his bike or his scooter and just run around being a kid.

It’s so strange, I wonder if I thought about Cameron as much when he was here as I do now. I feel like I’m becoming obsessed, wondering what he’s doing or what he would be doing, even when I’m having a good time. Our friends from New Jersey came on the Sunday before the 4th and it was fun. Charles lit fireworks and the kids ran around with sparklers. The weather was beautiful. I always bought Cameron one of those Old Navy July 4th shirts to wear and he would wake up excited to put it on, knowing that our house would be full of people. I miss his excitement.

Last Thursday, I attended a groundbreaking ceremony for Taylor's Field created in memory of a little girl Taylor Knowles that had the same tumor as Cameron, she lived here in West Hartford, she passed away June 2005. The preschool near here is creating a special park for her right across the street. Her family is very, very special. Her mom was here to sit with Cameron the Wednesday before he died. She was so helpful. The ceremony was nice, both parents spoke about Taylor and how they were happy and how their lives changed and how many other people’s lives have changed. I want to feel like that so badly, but I can’t. I’m glad that Cameron may have changed people, he may have changed us and he did leave this world having made a difference, but I want him back so badly. I just can’t see how losing him was any where near worth those things. I hope I get to that point where I can honestly feel that he’s not coming back and there is nothing I can do.

This past weekend, Charles, Charli and I went to our friends’ house at one of the beaches here in CT. We had a wonderful time. Cameron would have had a ball. I wonder if this would have been the year he finally learned to swim. I think he might have got on one of the tubes with Charles. He wanted so badly to be ‘brave’ like Charli, little did he know how brave he actually was. This weekend just seemed to be filled with nature’s beauty. We went on their boat and the water and the sky was just incredible. One of the books that I read about Heaven discussed how it was going to be similar to earth – they were created together. I just picture it being like it was this weekend. We actually saw the moon peaking through a cloud on the water creating a natural spot light. God is amazing. I hope He knows that as I struggle so much with our circumstances and question his ‘plan’, that I still recognize Him as who He is. It is a lot harder though.

Please continue to check in on us. There are still children out there fighting this tumor and I just got an email and there is a little girl that just died last week. Please pray for them and all the families that have to wake up without their child. Don’t forget to be thankful and live like Cameron did, taking advantage of every chance to laugh.

Be sure to go to view photos and see the new pictures.

Thursday, June 29, 2006 8:33 AM CDT

The Relay for Life was very nice. Nature didn’t really cooperate, so we were indoors (which is better for people like me!!!). I was so proud of people on our team. They were sooooo good. They walked for hours, around the gym. The air-conditioner was cranking and it was cold, but that was much better then being hot. There were about 100 local stores and restaurants that donated food and snacks to keep up happy. Charli and her friends must have walked around that gym for 3 hours before taking a break and then just took a short break. We had friends that just dropped in, walked while they had a few spare hours and then left to do their other commitments. It was so nice. At night they light the luminaries and there is a ceremony; Cameron’s Club took the first lap. They were playing bagpipes and it was so sad. Charli and I held the candle and walked around in tears with friends that I know were not just feeling our hurt, but each with memories of Cameron of their own and their own pain. Sometimes I forget that our immediate family is not the only one grieving, I definitely felt shared pain on that walk. As I was walking, my emotions were all over the place. There were bags in “Memory of Cameron Brooks” everytime I looked down. I was proud that he’s my son and sad that he’s gone. I was happy that he’s not sick anymore and angry that he ever was. I was thankful of the very special year that we had and friends we met and; just wanting to yell at God and tell him I want an explanation, it’s so not fair. I was glad Charli’s friends were there for her, just when I felt like, watching her cry is killing me, she went to walk with them. Thank You to all of “Cameron’s Club”, even the one’s that couldn’t be at that lap, especially to Meredith and Chris, the captains. It was a wonderful experience.

I didn’t even get into the sleeping conditions. I slept right through the volleyball game, imagine sleeping in a gym with a volleyball game until 1 am. Charli was in a chair, I stole Chris’ air-mattress (I asked her could I just lay on it for a few minutes and woke up at 5, sorry Chris) and the rest of the crew camped out on the floor.

Nothing else has been going on. Charli had two teeth pulled; she was uncomfortable, but still wanted to go to Target and the mall, so that’s what we did.

My mom, sister and nieces are coming today. I’m trying to prepare myself. This will be their first time without Cameron. I’m having such a hard time doing the things he loved and he LOVED his cousins. He loved having them here. Charli and I running around doing things that Cameron never wanted to do is so much easier then doing all the things he loved with people he wanted to be with. I hate leaving him out.

Well, thanks for checking in on us.

Friday, June 23, 2006 8:02 AM CDT

These have been a few pretty busy days. However, they continue to go by very slowly. The walk in NJ was very nice. It was great to see all of Charli’s friends that have grown up so much since elementary school. They were all walking and I was very proud.
I got a chance to see some people that I usually don’t get to spend much time with, which was very nice. Of course Charli stayed in NJ until I picked her up on Sunday. Then we had a nice, uneventful Father’s day dinner. They kept playing that Tiger Woods commercial with his father and I just wanted to be a snail and curl up in my shell. Being a parent is such a special gift, I think it’s very underappreciated most of the time. We often tell our kids how lucky they are to have certain things, but should probably mention how lucky we are to have them.

We are having some work done on our house and there is a big dumpster and port-a-potty in our front yard! I would have given anything to see Cameron’s face get off the bus and see that. He would have just thought that was the funniest thing in the world. I actually think he would go outside to go to the bathroom, just to use it. He was humored by the littlest things (not that this is a small by any means and I hope it’s only takes 2-3 weeks!). His level of excitement for anything small was always big. He always noticed when I changed my hair or got my eyebrows done. Unfortunately, he would be honest and tell me if it looked nice or not, but he would notice. He didn’t sweat the small stuff, he enjoyed it. I miss him so much. We all miss him so much.

Tuesday, Charli and I went to a concert to see this new band, Cute Is What We Aim For. I love that Charli likes diversity in music, but this was way out of my normal taste. She was excited that just the two of us were going and left the CD for me to learn the songs. The place was HOT and the music was loud, the band she wanted to see was last and every time another one would come on, she would look at me and mouth, “I’m sorry!”, for three and a half hours we watched these bands until……they finally came on. She was sooooo happy. I was tearing just watching her face, she was smiling and singing. She took the camera to take pictures of the band and I wanted to take pictures of her. When we left she just kept saying it was awesome and thank you. It was the best spent $10 in a long time and honestly, I liked the performance as well.

Yesterday, Charli ‘graduated’ from 8th grade. She looked absolutely beautiful; all of the kids looked great. And even though I’ve only known them for two years, I was proud of them. Cameron would have been proud of her. I wish he could have been there.

Tomorrow is the West Hartford Relay for Life. I will let you know how well we did. Jessie’s dad donated Cameron’s Club T-shirts and Meredith and Chris have been so busy planning and organizing. It will be awesome!

I have to go bake for tomorrow. Thanks for checking in, I love to hear that people sill read the updates.

Thursday, June 15, 2006 11:25 AM CDT

Wow - updates twice in one week.

I just wanted to update that we are so proud of Charli. She won an award at the 8th grade ceremony for her character and attitude, there was some academic part as well, but I'm not that sure. She's a great girl and has remained to be 'Charli' through everything.

Charli and her friends raised over $800 serving spaghetti to neighbors and friends. They worked really hard and were very adorable. I think they will never want to work in a restaurant after that experience. Then they sold pretzels dipped in chocolate and chocolate lollipop at the 'fun fair' at Cameron's school. I think they have topped $1000 total. I am so proud of them. I will add a picture as soon as I find my camera cord!

I’ve added under the links on this page Cameron’s Club for the relay. I don’t want to use this site to ask for money, that wasn’t the intent, but a few people have asked. What is neat is that you can donate to the team, to Charli and her friends on Cameron’s club team (the Duquettes of Hazzard) or you can buy a Luminaria in Memory of Cameron (that sounds so weird to me!!!!)

Charli and I are headed to New Jersey on Friday for their Relay for Life. A lot of Charli’s friends are walking! I am so proud to see kids doing this. Cameron would be so honored, he really would.

Yesterday at the Fun fair it was so weird to be there without Cameron, all the kids running around having fun. The families are so nice though, we were very lucky. Cameron’s school in NJ used to have an end of the year fair and I remember how we used to go when he was little and Charli was in 2nd or 3rd grade and Cindy and Adrianna would carry him around buying him everything he wanted until eventually he started kindergarten and was running around with his own friends. I just looked at pictures from last year’s fun fair. We had so much fun. I’m finally starting to think of some old good memories more and those last few days a little less. They still haunt me, but they are not as constant.

Thanks for checking in. I love the messages on the board and all the personal emails. I still wake up each morning looking for them.

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 7:35 AM CDT

I just thought I would do a quick update. We all continue to hang in there, missing Cameron like crazy. Every little thing makes me think of him. I bought corn on the cob for dinner this weekend and all I could think of was how he loved it…loaded with butter. Actually Cameron liked everything with butter, he could have eaten butter plain. It would be all over his face. I just want to hug him so badly!!!

Yesterday Cameron’s school dedicated a tree and garden to Cameron. There were about 8 kids that spoke. It was so touching; I hope that Cameron was watching from somewhere. I will include some pictures this week as well as a link to the new website that we will be using for the foundation.

I don’t think I mentioned it, but there is a team from Cameron’s school participating in the American Cancer Society’s Relay for Life here in West Hartford. Charli and her friends are on that team and they are having a spaghetti dinner at our house tonight, they will all be waitresses. I’m not sure how much food to prepare! I hope they reach their goal. They are great girls.

Thanks for checking in on us. Please keep us in your prayers. Leave us a note.

Saturday, June 3, 2006 4:55 PM CDT

It's been over four months. It's not one bit easier. Just longer since I've kissed him. We all miss him like crazy. I can't believe how much his smile helps me. I love looking at his pictures.

Wednesday, May 31, 2006 4:19 PM CDT

Time continues to move very slowly. This last weekend seemed to last forever. Charli had friends over Friday night and they hung out all weekend. It was nice to have them over here. I made them treats in the blender and quesadillas. I love having people in my house.

I want to thank everyone for the notes and emails. We do feel the love. Each day is still so hard – there is always something. I guess we will have to get used to making reservations for three.

Just wanted to share something that makes me laugh…….First, I must tell you that we let our kids watch way too much TV. Charli and Cameron both know and sing all the commercials. Cameron used to just laugh until tears came. There was one where this boy was on a swing and he started to swing really high until he flew into the air, Cameron couldn’t catch his breathe EVERY time he saw it he would laugh so hard. So now there are some new commercials and I just picture him laughing or dancing. There is one with this dancing little elephant and I just picture him standing up to start dancing or the one where this guy throws his cell phone. Cameron really found fun in the small stuff.,… he was such a little joy. He is still making me laugh. We were so lucky. He would sing the commercials over and over like that m-a-t-t-r-e-s and the vonage commercial, just always perky. I still can’t believe he’s gone.

Friends from Cameron’s school are doing the American Cancer Society Relay for Life. Last year we did the one in New Jersey and Cameron cut the ribbon and did the ‘survivors’ walk, it’s going to be so hard to watch that this year. Charli and her friends have a subteam – it will be fun. I will add the link later.

Thanks for checking on us.

Wednesday, May 24, 2006 10:19 AM CDT

Sorry for the no update. Updates are just not the same without Cameron. The house is so quiet without him, cartoons are never on, gamecube is never on. Everything we do seems like something is missing. No one drinks the milk and there are all his snacks and cereal in the closet that no one eats.

We have been staying busy. My parents came for the weekend; Charles and I had a black tie function on Friday; I had a bunch of friends over Saturday and Charli went to a party. Sunday Charli and I went to a concert at Six Flags with a few of her friends. We were so busy all weekend. How can things just keep going? Where is Cameron? It's starting to really bug me when people say he was right there with you. He wasn't with us. If he was we wouldn't be missing him so much. If he was, I wouldn't be so jealous whenever I see parents hugging their kids or kids his age just playing. I want to know who is taking care of him, who is making him laugh? Does he miss us? Does he even remember us? Why do we have to wait until we die to know what Heaven is like? I've been reading book after book and I have nothing but more questions? I want to hug him so badly, I want to buy him something, and I want to hear him laugh. I wonder if I will ever just face the fact that this is what it is? I still have to think sometimes did this really happen. It really stinks.

Again, I don’t feel like I know what to pray for. What can help? Some days are just so hard.

Sorry for the griping update, but the positive ones are so hard to get out. Please leave us a message. I like reading them.

Saturday, May 13, 2006 10:26 PM CDT

Happy Mother’s Day!!!! To all the mothers, grandmothers, aunts and all the women that have a special maternal relationship with someone – Have a great day. I can’t help but stress that this is a day to show appreciation for such an important job. Being a mother is one of the best jobs in the world. I have to thank God for such a wonderful opportunity to be a mother to Charli and Cameron.

I remember about three years ago, when Charles was traveling a lot thinking how unfair it was that I had so much to do and never had time to myself, never had a day off then one day I realized I like being with my kids. They are fun. And like the song says, “I’d rather live in their world than without them in mine.” I had no clue that one day I would be living without one of them. Never!!!!!! What I wouldn’t give to have Cameron come in tomorrow morning with something he made at school and tell me all the things he wanted to buy me. I have no plans for tomorrow, just hang out with Charli and make her do some things for me without complaining (like housework).

Well, not much to report. We are all hanging in there. Please keep us and all the other families that have to spend mother’s day without their child in your prayers. Also add a special prayer for all the kids that have to spend Mother’s Day without their mother, a little girl here in our town’s mother just passed away last week. Sometimes things are just so unfair.

Friday, May 5, 2006 6:04 AM CDT

Happy Birthday Dude!!!!

9 years ago I remember telling Charles, “Go ahead and play golf, I’m not having this baby today.” It was a very special golf tournament and he was over an hour away. About an hour after he left Cameron decided that today was his day. I waited, and then I counted contractions until they were about 8 minutes apart. I drove to the hospital and told them to make sure I was in labor before I called because they were just contractions, not painful at all. So I called Charles on about the 5th hole by now and told him it’s the real thing head to the hospital. He made it with about 2 hours to spare. Cam was born after about 20 minutes of hard labor on 5/5 at 5:00! I barely remember the rest of the day. Cameron just looked at whoever was holding him with the sweetest look. We were so happy. He was so cute – so sweet. What a wonderful day!!

It is going to be a beautiful day here in Connecticut. We wish with every fiber of our being that we could have run into his room this morning to wake him up with a Happy Birthday song. And as hard as it is to celebrate without him physically here, I went to get something for his classmates. I know if he’s looking down that he will be happy when his class gets something from him. Chris is making cupcakes and I just think about how proud he was last year when everyone loved the little brownie burgers the he bought into school.

So as much as it doesn’t feel like his birthday without him here and as sad as today will be as we miss him, he was born to us this day 9 years ago and it is a very special day. So make sure you say, “Happy Birthday Cameron – your first birthday in Heaven.”

Please keep us in your prayers.

Friday, April 28, 2006 1:37 PM CDT

Just a quick update to let you know that we are still here. Charles and I just returned from Scottsdale, Arizona, I accompanied him on a business trip. It was really nice, it is so beautiful there. I mean just incredible. I’m reading this book called Heaven and they were saying how there are glimpses of Heaven and Hell here on Earth. The scenery there was definitely heaven-like. The skies were just picturesque. There were so many birds and the rabbits were so cute. I saw a family of ducks, it was nice.

Charli stayed here with GrandCarol. Charli’s not much work to take care of, she’s just a little picky about what she eats, but she takes care of herself. I missed her dearly while I was gone.

Not much else is going on, we all continue to miss Cameron dearly and seem to still have this awful emptiness and sense of nothing is complete. His birthday is weighing heavily on our minds. How do we celebrate when we are so sad? He should be here, it’s not fair. I thought it would be an easy decision, I would bring something into school to honor him, but I am clearly not ready for that. I just can’t make it up to his school yet. Time really does not help – it’s not going to. It just makes it more real.

I got this new picture from Portrait Simple where we took pictures this summer. They have been so awesome! I thought he looked very cute – there are some other ones that were cute as well.

Please keep us in your prayers!

Thursday, April 20, 2006 7:50 AM CDT

I just wanted to update and let you know that Charli, Aunt Toni and I are back from Minnesota. We had an awesome time. It was so great to meet Maddie’s family. They are so wonderful and down to earth. We learned so much about her and really got to share some of Cameron with them. It was a nice way to spend our spring break. We spent way too much time at the Mall of America (not to mention our suitcases were a lot fuller on the way home!) We went to our family friend’s church for Easter and had dinner at their house. It was really fun. The weather was incredible. Minneapolis is very pretty and the people are very nice.

Charli still has the rest of the week off – we have a few day trips planned, Six Flags on Thursday, but not too much.

Charles stayed home and got to play a bit of guilt free golf. We missed him and he missed us a lot too. We are glad to be home!

It was a little hard to come home and face the reality that Cameron is not here. I think being away I could just think we left him home. He still has things all over the house – toys, clothes, books and games. Robots came on TV and Charles and I were thinking about how much fun we had when we went to the movie. He laughed hysterically, I wish I had a video of him laughing, I feel like I’ve forgotten it already. I can’t believe that we won’t hear it again. It was really cute.

I saw a commercial for Lego Eggo waffles, it seems so unfair. Cameron would have asked me everyday until I went to get those. He knew my password to do online grocery shopping and would go and add all the things he wanted to my cart (pop-tarts, croutons, cheese, cereal, pork chops and broccoli were his favorite things). He would ask if I needed any of the things that were on sale. (Cameron was a frugal spender –even if it wasn’t his money) There is so much I miss. Charli and I went to play Miniature Golf today with our friends. We had fun, but every hole I pictured how happy he was playing. I have to get over all the things he’s missing and realize that he’s not 'missing' these earthly things any more(even thought that’s all I know) and he’s happy.

Please keep us in your prayers.

Wednesday, April 12, 2006 4:39 PM CDT

I meant to update yesterday. I hope that people are still checking in – I still check for messages each day. I like to hear from you guys still.

I just read the update from April 11 last year. It’s similar – the weather over the weekend was great and the kids were all outside. The big difference was that Cameron wasn’t there. I won’t even describe how that feels I will save that for my personal journal but you can imagine. Saturday Charles, Charli and I went to our good friend Ali’s batmitvah. It was so fun and we were all so proud of her. We had a great time. Cameron loved Ali and would have been running around dancing with her and all the kids.

We are just trying to stay busy. Charli and I can’t wait for our trip to Minneapolis. Besides meeting Maddie's family, we have a good family friend that we will get to see as well. I will update when we return.

Please keep us in your prayers. Please pray for all the families.

Tuesday, April 4, 2006 6:14 AM CDT

April is here and the weather has been absolutely beautiful. Everything about spring makes me think of Cameron. Everything! I can’t believe he’s missing this. I sit and think about how last year he would bargain with me to stay home and how much I loved him hanging out with me. Now I would love just to run to the store with him or take a walk with him. We have this park near us that has the most beautiful flowers. I have got to start a garden with red and yellow flowers – he would have been pretty good about helping with that. (Except for the fact that he didn’t like to get dirty.)

We continue to stay pretty busy, but constantly feeling out of sorts. It’s so unfair that there are so many families that have to deal with this. I keep checking on Trent and Timmy. Trent (www.trentstrek.com) earned his wings yesterday. My heart is again broken. It’s so hard for me to read their updates because it makes me think of Cameron’s last days and I really want to get them out of my head. Even though Cameron was only in that sleeping state for a day – it was truly the longest and worst day of my life.

I really want to make a trip to Cameron’s school. They are going to plant a tree and I’m pretty excited about that. I miss all the people there – they are great. I just don’t know if I’m ready to go there without Cameron by my side. His teacher said they keep his desk as is and the kids can talk about him or leave a note when they want. I think that’s one fear is that everyone goes on and Cameron becomes that kid that died when I was in 3rd grade. I guess that should be what pushes me to create a legacy – to do something to make Cameron and his struggle more than just a memory.

Only 9 days until our trip to Minneapolis. I can’t wait to meet Maddie’s family and just be away.

Please leave us a message and keep us in your prayers!!!!!

Monday, March 27, 2006 7:01 AM CST

Another week has passed. We are all fine. Our house is so quiet. We all miss Cameron so much. We had a lot of company this weekend to help celebrate my birthday. It was awesome, the best case of ‘friends therapy’. Friends have got to be one of the best therapies for grieving. That is something to think about each day – who’s going to be there when you need them. You need to develop great relationships with people before you need them. You get good friends by being a good friend. Think about that.

I was very happy this weekend. I got to talk to good friends about Cameron. I love talking about him. All I could think about was how happy he would have been with a house full of people – he loved having company. He would sit right outside their door listening for them to wake up.

Charli had a good weekend as well. She spent the weekend with her friends. She always seems to have fun and laugh, just being silly with her friends. She’s a great kid.

I’m getting myself back together. I had a breakfast date last week with a friend and have a dinner this week. I have to work through that guilt of moving on without Cameron in our lives. I feel like I’m almost disrespecting him and that eventually I will have a life that has more memories without Cam than with him. All I know right now is that I miss him like crazy. Every morning I just wait to hear from him. “I’m ?” “How many cups of coffee do you want?” “What are we doing today?”

Thanks for checking in and please continue to pray for our family.

Monday, March 20, 2006 7:18 AM CST

Not much to update. We are all doing fine. The days just go by like Cameron was still here. I still have that ‘he’s upstairs’ feeling. We stay pretty busy; I’m just not sure doing what. Charli and I always have some errand to run after school. We went to our friend’s house in VT to ski Saturday night and I just wanted to tell Cameron that we didn’t leave him out. I was just hoping that he wasn’t looking down on us missing us and feeling left out. We hardly even mentioned him. (Not that I want to spend the whole time talking about him.) It’s just so weird. He’s just gone and we have to go on. The problem is ‘going’ on is no longer just ordinary and natural, it’s a concerted effort. You are constantly thinking you have to do this or that. We have to continue to laugh and doing things only takes you’re mind off of him for a second, then it comes right back. I hope that I can learn to just miss him and not be consumed with him dying.

I cleaned out his toy box last week. It wasn’t as hard as I thought, because I probably would have thrown out all those broken and missing pieces toys anyway. It was just hard because I couldn’t justify keeping most of the things I kept. I just wanted them. He loved them. I know they are material things and he sure doesn’t need them where ever he is. I don’t know what I’m going to do with them, but they were his things. All I could think was what he is doing now. I still have such a hard time grasping Heaven. A million things go through my head, but they all seem so fabricated. I think what I want to think, the power of positive thinking. I read that Angels spend their time praising God and I worry because Cameron couldn’t sit through church. I could picture him looking around wondering when snack time is or where is the game room. Do they have toys? Do they eat? I guess I need to keep reading.

I still continue to struggle with the forever part of this. The 'nevers' just seem to push me off the edge. Even when it doesn’t pertain to Cameron, never has a changed meaning. Never is a very long time. I used to read people’s web site and when they would say they can’t wait to be reunited with their kids I used to think, they were so depressed and wanted to die. I can’t believe how much I understand that statement now and it means nothing like that. Believe me just like Cameron said one time (the only time) that we talked about death. “I don’t want to do that.” Like it was some ride he didn’t want to get on. I just look forward to the reunion.

Please leave a message in the guest book. Continue to pray for our family.

Oh- I got the video of Cameron’s Celebration of Life (we had two celebrations!). I can’t believe how many people were there!!! It was awesome. I didn’t know half the people and it also kept coming back to me that I saw someone I totally forgot was there. All I could think was that I wish we could have done that before he died and a lot of those people could have met him. He was such a great kid. He would have made them all smile and laugh. (We showed videos of him dancing so I know they all laughed any way.) I hope he was there so happy that the kids were having fun and running around. It was awesome. Our friend Bill (that did the video for us), talked to people and they sent us messages. It was so nice. I want to watch it everyday.

Sunday, March 12, 2006 9:37 PM CST

I thought I would update. We had a pretty good weekend. The weather was great. Charli went to Jersey to visit. Charles and I had a great time at the Billy Joel concert on Friday with friends. We are all hanging in there. Whoever said that it will get easier with time is not correct. I think the pain has become more intense – the more you do the more you realize you’re doing with out him. It’s like we are just leaving him out of our lives and it really burns. Saturday I could hear all the kids outside playing and it just really made me so sad. I try to picture that he’s even more elated than that in Heaven, but its hard to picture that without us being there. It was strange that after Cameron got sick – I would get jealous when Charles went to play golf with him, I didn’t want to miss anything. Now I’m missing everything.

Charli’s basketball league had their play offs today. Her team wasn’t in it, but they were all supposed to go. All I could think about was Cameron crying last year when her team won. He was so happy for her. I guess I should keep that in mind, he loves to see us do well. (As long as you weren’t competing with him – then he wanted to win)

Don’t get me wrong we are not sitting around crying (ok – not crying all the time). We still laugh, smile and definitely make plans. It’s just that EVERYTHING makes you think about Cameron. It just can’t be described and all I can say is you never, never want to know.

Honestly, I still have to say that we still feel so lucky in so many ways. He was (is) an awesome son. Charli is an awesome daughter and, we were and still are a great family. We were so blessed to have been given such a great year. I love looking at all the pictures. I think there are so many people that will live into their 90’s and never live like that, never learn to love like we did and won’t learn to appreciate family and friends. I can’t even go into the people that are around us; they just continue to be amazing. The other bereaved parents that I’ve met have been my main support. Our family is the same way, just as we would have expected. I believe that Charles and I look at nature in a totally different way; the sun shining, the sky, the clouds, rain, the stars- everything makes us think of where Cameron is. God is still good, even while we are hurting. Cameron loved nature and I’m sure he is loving heaven.

Please keep us in you prayers.

Tuesday, March 7, 2006 8:17 PM CST

Happy Birthday to my little girl!! We are way too young to have a 14 year old. Charli had a great day. Her friends decorated her locker and gave her gifts. She was very happy. Then we had an impromptu party for her with neighbors and friends. It was very nice. She was so excited and was really happy with all the gifts that she got ($$). It was fun to have everyone over here. I tried to not constantly think about how Cameron should have been running around with them. I wonder if I will ever not feel like that.

I miss Cameron so much. I have got to get a grip on the fact that he is in a great place. I was trying to think of times that he seemed to have a glimpse of heaven on earth and a strange thought came in my head. On the first day of chemo that we had to go to the hospital (all of our chemo was done at home before that) and we went up to the infusion room which are four beds for kids that are going to be hooked up to an IV all day. He walked in and saw the TV and the bed and the DVD player and he was so excited. He didn’t think twice about the fact that he was going to be hooked up to an IV all day or that he was in a hospital – he just said “This is awesome.” Then for lunch he had mozzarella sticks, chicken nuggets, chips and (something else that I can’t remember). He was just so happy. It really didn’t take much and he was totally unconcerned to the surroundings. He was so excited. I hope that he is so excited now. Each day I will have to try to get rid of all the thoughts of the last few months and remind myself that he’s so happy now, not that he wasn’t happy enough with us (there goes the real me chiming in).

Well, please keep us in your prayers. Oh! I forgot that there are two children, Troy and Jake that had the same tumor as Cameron (and hopefully they are playing together now) and their parents have both had babies in the last few months that need your prayers. I think sometimes that you think that we’ve paid our dues and should be free from anything else in our lifetime, but unfortunately that’s not how it works. I will update later with their websites, but please say prayers for them.

Friday, March 3, 2006 4:22 PM CST

For some reason I felt it necessary to update today. It’s been one month since Cameron left (couldn’t find a better way to put that!!) and because Feb had 28 days it fell on a Friday again. It seems weird. All I can say is we are hanging in there - all grieving in our own way. I guess the biggest thing that I miss is just having him around – hearing the TV or the game cube or just chating – night time was always fun too. First the bath fight, then TV fight then finally the hugs.

Charli has been staying busy, a little crazy with some Middle School Drama – but I hope all that works itself out. Girls at this age!!! Her birthday is Monday; she really doesn’t want to do anything. We’ll figure out something.

Please keep us in your prayers.

Sunday, February 26, 2006 5:08 PM CST

Things are so different, yet strangely the same. It seems like Cam is going to come around the corner any minute. He was always fairly quiet and played by himself so it’s not like he was always around in your face – he could disappear for hours. I think when we are busy we just kinda assume that he’s somewhere else, but not gone for good.

I added a new picture from the boards that were at Cameron’s service.

Charli and I had a ball in the city; we got there late and decided not to see a show because the lines were too long. We went to a restaurant called Mars2112 where you board a simulated spaceship and pretend to eat in Mars. Charli and I kept laughing because we kept thinking there is no way that Cameron would have walked 100 feet near this restaurant. As brave as he was about treatment, etc; he was scared of dark places and scary rides. He wouldn’t go near Rainforest Café and would run past those dark stores at the mall (like Hot Topic or when they set up for Halloween). We kept laughing every time one of the aliens would come near us at the restaurant saying how he would have freaked out. We spent the whole day in and out of stores up and down Broadway.

Then we came home and picked up Grandpa and Grand Carol. Wednesday Grandpa and I cleaned the garage while Charli and Grand Carol ran out. That was somewhat of an emotional trip for me. Cam has a scooter that he loved and all the kids in the neighborhood seem to have the same one so we put his name on his with my label maker. He was so happy because he didn’t like to mix things up. He loved to open the garage and play with all the things in there. His bike was on the wall he rode that everyday for the two months between when we moved and he was diagnosed. He would just go around the circle and in and out of people’s driveways. He loved to play. He really just loved to play.

Believe it or not Friday, we went shopping again to the outlets - again we had a ball. I think that it’s easier to do things that Cameron would have hated to do then we aren’t leaving him out. Grand Carol, Charli and I ran around to all the stores like we had never shopped before and it was freezing. We just had a good day. We ordered Chinese food and Grand Carol started to clean Charli’s room (that was a two day process!). Boy was she happy!

Charles has been in California since Wednesday at a work meeting (and the PGA tournament!!!). He sounds like he’s having fun. We miss him here.

Thanks for checking in on us. Please continue to pray for our family; what’s strange is that I don’t think we need to pray for Cameron any more. I’ve been on a crazy binge trying to read everything I can about Heaven and so far what I read he doesn’t need prayers – he’s happy and free now and being taken care of personally by God. It’s hard to face the fact that he was just on loan. As much as I want him back I picture that when he took his first step again and spoke - he danced and shouted and was elated! I know he did that crazy robot dance that he loved to do. I hope that he doesn’t have to sleep and he plays all day. We need the prayers, to get through missing him, missing everything about him. Prayers to give us comfort and peace, to get through with just memories of his smile rather than the real thing.

Tuesday, February 21, 2006 11:33 PM CST

The days continue to move pretty slow. We had an interesting weekend. Charli spent the weekend in New Jersey with her best friend. She’s just so happy when they are together, even if they are not doing anything. I went to dinner with some friends and then used my spa gift certificate. It’s so strange that in that quiet ‘relaxing’ time, all I can do is think about Cameron and the past few weeks. I think I need to avoid quiet – relaxing time and have busy time. The nights are long enough quiet time. Charles went snowboarding this weekend and twisted his ankle. He’s limping, but it wasn’t bad enough to keep him from working (or like he says – He’s too tough to stop working!)

Charli is out of school all week. We went shopping all day yesterday. It was fun. We had facials today (thanks to Swim Across the Sound) and they were AWESOME; tomorrow we are going into NY to try to get half price tickets to a show and have lunch. Grand Carol and Grandpa Tally are coming Wednesday night and Charli can’t wait for Grand Carol to clean her room.

I think Friday we will head to the outlets to get some Birthday/Spring shopping in. Shopping for a teenager is really rough. Cameron was so easy to shop for just no ‘church’ clothes. He liked any shirt that was ‘cool’ and couldn’t care less who made it.

Aunt Toni is trying to upload the slideshow from Cameron’s celebrations. (Not going as well as planned.) It was beautiful; the whole ceremony was just so nice. Such a great way to say – to remember such a special little boy.

Cameron’s remains arrived today. I sure didn’t get the sense of comfort that I thought would come with having him home. Nothing seems to be very comforting. I really thought that I would be better at this.

Please continue to pray for our family – I’m not even sure what to pray for anymore. I guess help healing, maybe some strength. Just keep us in your thoughts!!!! As well as all the other parents who have to live with only the memories of their kids.

Friday, February 17, 2006 7:06 AM CST

It’s hard to believe that is has just been two weeks. Time is just moving so slowly. We are all just hanging in there. We have all been just kinda going on with day to day, but it’s just not the same. We are all different. I hate to say, not better. I can’t speak for Charli or Charles, but my emotions are all over the place. The past 16 months were a piece of cake compared to now. There are so many things I need to tell him. Cameron came in my room months ago to tell me he had a dream about a man in the window in our home office – he asked me everyday did I order curtains. He wouldn’t go in the office at night until I did. They finally came last week.

Charles and I went to Charli’s all-star game on Tuesday. She is so cute. We are so proud of her. We kept looking at each other and just smiling. I have decided to use all the gift certificates that I’ve received and made facial and massage appointments. I’m trying to make sure my calendar is full.

It is very surreal. I have been heavily relying on the parents that have been down this path. I look at the pictures from the board at the services so much each day and smile & cry at the same time. The song “With Hope” by Stephen Curtis Chapman just seems to fit so well.

It’s hard to see people – I can’t imagine how Charles gets through all of the “How are you doing?” That used to be such an ordinary question… now it seems to be loaded with pity. There is no correct answer and ‘fine’ seems fake and incomplete. I just got an e-mail from Sydney’s mom and I agree that “I’m thinking of you” might be better. I don’t know what to say – so I can’t expect other people to say the right thing. (I do know I don’t want to hear about their personal stories of adult death – they are not comforting. He was 8 not 80 – it’s different. ) I hope that I eventually get some of my patience back and that I become a better person not a bitter person. I am praying for strength to do the right thing.

I love reading the guest book entries. I’m so proud that there is now Cameron Brooks Brook in Central Park!!! Thanks Arabella I can’t wait to go see it. I hope that there is at least a Mountain Dew Code Red bottle in it; or a skittles wrapper those were his favorites. (Sorry New Yorkers – just kidding).

Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers as well as all the other parents that have to move on with a piece of them missing.

Monday, February 13, 2006 1:22 PM CST

Saturday was just as beautiful as the service we had on Wednesday. Again we were surrounded by the most incredible people and we celebrated Cameron’s life.

Now Charli has gone to school and Charles is at work. This house is so quiet. It seems like every time I turn around I have something to tell Cameron. It’s really weird. We have these huge icicles hanging from our house. He would think it was the most awesome thing. It’s almost hard to enjoy the beauty of the sun shining on the snow, but it is beautiful.

I just want to thank everyone for the kind messages and all the people that came to support us. You have no idea how much easier it makes this to know that we are not alone.

Please keep us in your prayers.

Saturday, February 11, 2006 11:21 AM CST

I just thought that I would do a quick update. Hopefully everyone knows that they can go to previous updates if they need information for today’s service.

We are all hanging in there. I honestly think better than expected. I’m sure that the hustle and bustle of planning and visiting is keeping us together. I think we all feel that this is surreal and Cameron is just over someone else’s house.

It’s hard to explain, but the service on Wednesday was awesome! All the hard work of friends and family really paid off. I think most people could only dream of such a great farewell. We really celebrated his life rather than said good-bye. The place was decorated just like a party. Pictures and slideshow of Cameron were everywhere. There were a lot of his school friends and so many people that Charles and I can’t believe traveled so far to come and support us. It was about 500 of our good friends. Mrs. Clark and Cameron’s friend Quinn both had moving things to say. Our good friend from college officiated and my Pastor from my church in New Jersey spoke and my mom’s pastor from Maryland flew all the way up to be supportive and said a prayer. Charles made an awesome speech about how we handled everything (including Cameron), Charli talked about how Cameron loved to have fun, followed by a really fun video of him dancing and being silly. I ended with special thank you’s.

It was so good to see so many people and it seemed like even when I got sad I could look up, see a friend that could bring a smile to my face.

Charli seems to be hanging in there. She seems to be fighting a cold and has been with Aunt Toni for the last few days. We just talked and both are looking forward to getting home.

Our next celebration is today at 2 and unfortunately there is a Nor’Easter headed to the area today. I hope it doesn’t stop people from coming.

Well, please continue to keep us in your prayers.

I will update next week.

Monday, February 6, 2006 5:49 PM CST

Link to Cameron’s obituary

In lieu of flowers, contributions in Cameron’s honor may be made to The Cameron Brooks Foundation and sent to Webster Bank 774 North Main St. West Hartford, CT 06117.

****** As we celebrate Cameron’s life we would ask that anyone attending the service please wear bright cheerful colors. Some black is fine and please feel free to bring children.*******

The services for Cameron will be held in CT on Wednesday, Feb. 8 at 6 pm at the West Harford Meeting and Conference Center in the Town Hall Auditorium. The address is:

50 South Main Street
West Hartford, CT 06117

Directions to Town Hall
From I-84 East:
Take exit 41 (South Main Street) and turn left at the traffic light onto South Main Street.*
From I-84 West:
Take exit 41 (South Main Street) and turn right at the traffic light onto South Main Street.*
*Proceed north on South Main Street for 1.5 miles. The West Hartford Meeting & Conference Center will be on the right. Just before the building, turn right into Burr Street, then turn left into the parking lot. Follow along the path to the entrance.
For Elevator Access: Proceed past the conference center and turn right onto Memorial Road. Immediately turn right into the circular driveway. Enter through the glass doors and take the elevator to the "Auditorium" level.
Hotel Accomodations can be made with Courtyard by Marriott in Farmington, CT reservations can be made by calling 860-521-7100, rooms will be under Toni Brooks. If you are planning on staying please e-mail me at tbrooks4176@yahoo.com.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Another celebration will be held in MD on Saturday, Feb. 11 at 2 pm at Ascension Lutheran Church in Landover Hills. The address is

Ascension Lutheran Church
7415 Buchanan Street
Landover Hills, MD 20784

Directions to Ascension Lutheran: Click to see map - http://www.ascensionchurch.ws/images/ascensionmap.gif

From Richmond North:

1. Start out going NORTH on I-95 N toward Washington
2. Merge onto CAPITAL BELTWAY / I-95N /I-495N toward Baltimore/College Park
3. Merge onto MD 450 W Annapolis Road toward Bladensburg/Washington (Exit 20B)
4. Turn LEFT onto ARDWICK ARDMORE RD. (St. Mary’s Catholic Church on the corner)
5. Turn LEFT onto BUCHANAN STREET
6. End at 7415 BUCHANAN ST. (across from the Post Office)

From Baltimore South:
1. Start out going SOUTH on MD-295 S toward Washington
2. Merge onto the CAPITAL BELTWAY/ I-95S/I-495S toward Andrews Air Force Base/Richmond
3. Merge onto route I-450 west toward Bladensburg/Washington (Exit 20)
4. Turn left onto ARDWICK ARDMORE RD. (St. Mary’s Catholic Church on the corner)
5. Turn left onto Buchanan Street
6. End at 7415 Buchanan Street (Post Office is directly across the street)

Hotel Accomodations can be made with Courtyard by Marriott in New Carrollton, MD reservations can be made by calling 301-577-3373, rooms will be under Cameron Brooks Memorial Service. If you are planning on staying please e-mail Lois Fulford at LSFulford@aol.com.

Friday, February 3, 2006 10:36 AM CST

UPDATE....Just quick update, we are all OK. We are all grieving in our own way, but constantly finding things to laugh about and memories to share. We are all busy planning. Tentatively we are planning to celebrate Cameron’s life Wednesday or Thursday night here in Connecticut and Saturday at 2 p.m. in Maryland. We will post as soon as possible when final arrangements have been made. The days are moving so slow, that it feels like Cam passed away weeks ago. We constantly keep checking the guestbook as a source of comfort and again we can’t thank everyone enough for all that they have done for us during this journey.

Charli is amazing; she laughed and played with her friends yesterday (they are pretty great also). We got our nails done, went to a movie and laughed. Then we all went out to dinner. She is such an inspiration to us all; she continues to be our source of strength. Although she knows she’s off the hook for things now, she still continues to want to go to school and basketball. I think Cameron gave her a little help today because during her basketball game Charli took the ball from the opening tip off and dribbled down the court to make a lay up. HER FIRST BASKET OF THE YEAR!! We are so proud of her!

***************************************

We are deeply saddened to update that Cameron earned his wings this morning at 9:44. He was in his favorite place on his daddy’s chest, very, very peaceful! We can’t wait to see him again and very glad that he is cancer-free and smiling again.

Thanks you for all your prayers and thoughts. We are so grateful. I will update later with more information about our plans.

We are taking some time to adjust and would really appreciate no phone calls or visits at this time. (By the way - we don't need any food either.)

Thursday, February 2, 2006 12:59 AM CST

Just a quick update...Cameron has taken more of a turn for the worse. He is still in no pain. I will continue to update as much as we can. Please send special prayers for our family.

Please say a special prayer for Sydney who earned her wings last night.

Carla

Tuesday, January 31, 2006 2:31 PM CST

I just thought I’d do a quick update. Cameron continues to not do so well. We are trying to increase the steroids even more to see if that helps a little. We are still going ahead with chemo on Friday. There are some tough decisions. It’s getting really hard for us to watch him. He still surfs the web and plays GameCube, but hardly ever smiles. I think that’s the hardest part. Eating is somewhat of a struggle also.

We are all hanging in there. Please keep us in your prayers.

Friday, January 27, 2006 5:52 PM CST

Boy do the days fly by. This was a good week. We had snow on Monday so, again the kids were out of school. I think the kids in CT will get about a month off for the summer at this rate - enough of the snow. Tuesday we went to the hospital to get counts and they were on their way up – which is a good thing. Wednesday, the people at Charles’ job threw a party for Cameron at his favorite restaurant, Ginza’s. It was a lot of fun. They bought Cameron a little portable screen for his game cube so that we can take it even where there is no TV. Both kids were allowed to invite a friend and Cameron decided to invite our neighbor, Alyssa. They are both in the same grade. They get along great and can be together for hours and neither of them needs to say anything. For the most part, Cameron isn’t very chatty, never really has been.

Great news this week, Charli was elected as one of the Students of the Month at her school. We are so proud of her. She’s such a great kid. She was also selected to be on the all-star basketball team. I don’t think she’s that great of a player, but she works really hard.

Cameron had chemo today. His counts still weren’t up to the required level, but Dr. Hagstrom thinks they are going up and his bone marrow is producing ‘a bunch of things that I don’t remember what they are called but have something to do with white blood cells’ so that he should be fine. Cameron continued to lose various abilities this week. We increased the steroids again with some hope that it would help. It’s getting hard to watch him, especially since smiles are so few and far between. His and our biggest frustration is definitely the speech. It is so hard to understand him and he gets so tired of repeating everything. He likes to just type it and have you read it. Dr. Hagstrom thought that he looks good considering….he was very happy that Cameron snapped at him for asking the same question twice. He thinks that’s a good thing and happy that he’s still so good at playing the video games. Cam continues to spend hours on the web looking for things to add to his list. The other day I saw him looking at a GPS.

Well, one of the local Girl Scout Troops is bringing us dinner tonight from Barbs (our favorite pizza place) and Cameron wants fishsticks so I better get started.

Thanks for checking in on us. Please pray for our miracle – we really need it now.

Monday, January 23, 2006 5:48 PM CST

Thanks for checking in on us. We are all hanging in there. Cam didn’t have a great week; there were quite a few changes with different functions. I normally wouldn’t update all the changes, but I know that I go to other websites to compare the various stages of this illness. He’s definitely harder to understand and drools more. His left eye (formerly known as the ‘good’ eye) seems to struggle to stay straight so he turns his head to look at things. He can still see out of it very well. He’s still playing game cube and working on his ‘things I want’ list. It takes a bit of energy to talk so he’d prefer that people don’t ask him a bunch of question and he lets them know that with the funniest loud ‘you are really getting on my nerves’ sighs. I often want to use them. Friday his ANC and platelets were low so we only did one chemo and a platelet transfusion. We are going to check tomorrow to see if the white count is up. So Friday wasn’t too bad. Cam has a special visitor form one of his classmates, Quinn. Her and her mom came with gifts and Friendly’s. He sat and ate the whole thing without stopping.

So, we decided to increase the steroids and use Ritalin to hopefully help with the moodiness from the steroids. It’s been three days and we can already see that he’s not drooling as much and he’s not choking when swallowing (I forgot to mention that earlier) and his face doesn’t ‘drop’ as much. He has already started being more hungry, but he’s not anymore moody than he was. He will actually speak to you if he’s not in the middle of the game or you are offering him something to eat or drink.

Needless to say, it’s been pretty tough around here, but between great friends and neighbors and our family just working together – there is a sense of peace and happiness. It’s weird that there is just something in the air that seems to be keeping us all together. It’s so obvious that God’s grace is allowing us to stick together and enjoy Cameron and our family. It’s a miracle, but we are all just going on. We eat dinner and breakfast together and laugh. We got to play a game of trivial pursuit – Cameron won. Charli usually wins. We had friends over yesterday for the game, Charli went to the mall with friends and spent the whole weekend obsessed with ‘High School Musical” on TV, Charles went to work – it’s like someone puts a blanket on you when your sleep. I don’t think any of us walk past Cameron without a big kiss (giving him one – he’s not giving them out too much anymore) but he doesn’t mind getting them.

We have a fun dinner planned on Wednesday from Charles’ job. Aunt Toni will be here on Thursday. It’s going to be a good week. I will update and let you know if the counts are up and if the Ritalin is working.

Thanks for checking in on us and keeping us in your prayers. Please send special prayers for Sydney, she too is having tough days with this tumor.

Wednesday, January 18, 2006 6:49 AM CST

Again a week has gone by. Not much to report, we haven’t been doing too much. Cam made it to school one day last week for a couple of hours and Charli had a stomach bug and missed two days. She slept the whole first day (I mean about 23 of the 24 hours), the next day by 11, she was ready to get out of the house so the three of us spent the afternoon in Target! They had gift cards and I had credit cards. It was fun.

We went to friends on Saturday to watch the Redskins lose, but it was fun.

Otherwise we are just hanging in there. Cam is about the same, he seemed a little off some this week. I hope it’s a cold or something.

We have therapy this morning and then off to get a new prism for Cam’s glasses. We will both be pooped by the time we get home.

Please keep us in your prayers. I’ll update on Friday’s chemo after the weekend. (We were on a break this Friday.)

Oh, please add my sister to your prayers, she was in a car accident and broke her kneecap (ouch!). She’s ok…just immobile and continue to pray for my brother in Iraq.

I’m sure I don’t need to ask to pray for all the other families, especially for Justis’ family. His service was this weekend. I bet it was beautiful.

Tuesday, January 10, 2006 11:45 AM CST

I really didn’t mean for a week to go by..not sure doing what but we’ve been really busy. We made it to school for a few hours on Thursday. It cost us some money, but Cam was fairly pleasant to everyone. I love to see him sitting there in class and pretend that like it is back to the way it was.

For the most important news….our MRI showed that the tumor is stable!!! Actually it is less enhanced (which is the blood flowing though it and the brightness on the MRI), that’s good news for us. Charles and I are so happy. We will take stable. He’s responding to the chemo. We understand that today it could be changing already, but for right now….it’s stable and I think we both slept very well last night. God is good. He really has answered our prayers. I think we are learning to pray differently, learning to be thankful for little things. I think Cameron would really like to walk again and that constant smile isn’t there anymore, but he still laughs until tears come out and he’s in no pain and more importantly he’s still playing Mario Party (which is his favorite game). We all get great hugs from him and we all sat down to our typical crazy dinner last night. That in itself is a miracle with this particular tumor.

Now to catching up…….
Friday was supposed to be our ‘short chemo day’. The way the cycle goes, we are on a two week break from two of the chemos so it should have only been 30-60 minutes. Well, besides the normal business of the clinic and the pre-meds for nausea, it was more like two hours. Then right as we were leaving they checked his counts and his platelets were low. Not dangerously low, but since it was Friday and they weren’t sure they were going up or down, Dr. Hagstrom thought we should do a platelet transfusion to avoid having to possibly do it over the weekend. (Which with out them there would be a nightmare.) So they started that process and we had our first transfusion, a platelet transfusion. Unfortunately they didn’t have the platelets we needed so Cam and I had to wait at the hospital until after 8 when the Red Cross could get them to us. We were done and home by 10. We were both exhausted and hungry. However, he did marvelous!! With the exception of just wanting to go home and play game cube and wanting Chinese Food – he never really complained. Now his normal winter nose bleeds that poured out last week are quick little dabs!! It was pretty amazing. Thank you to all those people that give blood.

Saturday was a laid back day, the most exciting part was his friend Quinn had some friends out to dinner and they went to Ginzas!!! Cameron was so happy. He loves that place and Quinn and Jesse are his good friends. We ate in the other room that he’s really wanted to visit. Charli and I tagged along too. It was really fun.

Sunday was awesome! Charles’ friends invited us to go snowmobiling at their house. It was so fun. I left my camera, but they took pictures and will send them to us! Charles put Cameron in front of him and they went. He said it was really fun. They also had a little hill so he finally got to go sledding. He’s been asking all winter. It was really fun and it was a beautiful day. I can’t wait to get the pictures.

Charli had a basketball game on Sunday, after all of that and we all just chilled around the house. It was a good weekend.
Now, Cameron should be at school, but I wanted to update and I need to get copies of the MRI out across the country for review and we have no cereal bars (which are a staple in our house). Cam wants to go to the grocery store with me, so I will throw a few math problems into the trip and call it a school day! I’m going to go play Game Cube with him for a while and hit the road. We are having beautiful weather in CT.

Thanks for all your prayers. Continue to keep us and all the families in your prayers!

Tuesday, January 3, 2006 12:58 AM CST

Friday, January 5 - I just wanted to update that Justis became an angel this morning. Please say a prayer for his family. www.caringbridge.org/tx/justiswayne
I don't feel like doing an update, so I just kept the old one here.

*****************

We are having another snowstorm here in Connecticut. The kids were supposed to go back to school today. I was going to try to make Cameron go for a few hours today, but I guess we will try tomorrow. I think he is up to it physically and mentally. He's been in pretty good spirits. He's actually been pretty happy, giggling and making all sorts of smart 'Cameron' like comments. Charli left early this morning for her snow day ritual with her friends. I wanted them to come here, but she said we didn't have a hill so she walked almost a mile over to her friend’s house.

Charles was off to work early this morning and Cam and I are just hanging around. He's playing game cube and I'm running around doing whatever he tells me to do..get this, move that, more drink, food, tissue, remote....he's taking the 'king' thing very seriously. I steal kisses in between demands so I guess it's all even.

The weekend was great, our visitors were fun. The boys played gamecube all day and Callie and I got a chance to just girl chat like old times, very relaxing. The boys were here last July 4th and wanted to know if we could have fireworks so Charles obliged and we lit some on the deck. It was very pretty, we all watched from inside!!!

It's that time when I struggle to take down the Christmas decorations. This season really went by fast, it was very good though. We were so blessed with wonderful people around us. I can't think of very many lonely moments in the Brooks house.

For some reason, I thought a lot about all the people that I met this year through caringbridge and through Cameron’s illness that were spending Christmas without their child. I can't explain how I felt, but for some reason I looked up compassion - "sympathetic consciousness of others' distress together with a desire to alleviate it". It was that 'desire to alleviate' that made that word so perfect. It's so strange that you can feel like that towards people you've only met through cyberspace, but many of you know exactly how I feel and many of you have never met us and feel the same way. It’s a good thing, definitely a life-changing experience.

Please continue to keep us and our friends in your prayers!!

Saturday, December 31, 2005 11:20 PM CST

I was excited to add an update with 2006, but caringbridge is on CST so I probably won't make it up another half an hour.

Happy New Year to all our friends!! We are so blessed to bring 2006 in together!!

Cameron had a great day, after a not so great chemo day on Friday. He was happy and smiles all day. It was great. He fell asleep right around 11 tonight and was not that happy that we woke him up, but we got good pictures anyway. A fake smile is better than no smile at all.

Charli actually just woke all of us up to bring in the new year. Thank God for Charli or we would have missed it.

I promise to update later - we have NJ visitors coming tomorrow.

Thanks and pray for a healthy and happy year for us and all our other friends.

Monday, December 26, 2005 4:32 PM CST

Merry Christmas!!! What a wonderful day it has been. We are so blessed to spend the day as a family. That in itself is a gift. God is good!! It was such fun to watch how excited the kids were. Cameron kept pretending to faint every time he opened a gift. He had over 100 things on his list so I thought he might be upset that he didn’t get everything, but he was just so happy he didn’t even think about it. He got a ton of games for GameCube and his GameBoy. He got Nintendo DS, but he seemed to have trouble using it with his left hand so he summoned for his old gameboy and played with that. We will figure that out later. He was still very excited. He’s been playing video games all day. He got a special package from all his friends at school too. It was fun.

Charli got a laptop and the SIMS computer game (it’s something a lot of the kids play). I’m already starting to dread that because she’s never going to leave her room now. Santa left her a note to load the Spanish software on it and practice (she’s having some issues in Spanish at school). I got a new digital camera and an ipod!!! Charles got clothes, great gifts the kids made and a bunch of Redskins gear.

We also got a great package in the mail from a good friend that was in Iraq with my cousin. It was really the highlight of Christmas for me – Suellyn (who we’ve never met) carefully picked out great gifts for all of us and wrote the best letter ever. She talked about our journey and it was inspirational. It gave some meaning to this whole ordeal. It was what I needed on that day.

Overall the day was filled with joy. I think the whole season has been filled with joy.

We are expecting family tomorrow and it will be a fun week. I promise to update. And thanks so much for all the wonderful greetings!

I hope that all the families that have lost love ones have some peace here on earth and find some joy, during these tough days through great memories, family and good friends. I will say special prayers for you and hope that everyone takes extra time to appreciate what they have.

Thursday, December 22, 2005 9:26 PM CST

Not much to update; we are all just hanging in there. Actually a lot has gone on. Friday’s Chemo went well. The infusion room is great. Maria brought “Krunk’s New Groove” and Cameron couldn’t wait to watch it. Cameron was pretty set on going snowboarding after chemo. Since standing is a challenge, we weren’t exactly sure how we would manage that, but we were going to try. (We ARE going to try.) Unfortunately after chemo he didn’t feel well and didn’t want to go. Cam and I stayed here and Charli and Charles went skiing/snowboarding. Grand Carol and Grandpa Tally came on Saturday. We were supposed to all go to a wrapping party (that’s where we wrap the presents for a family that we sponsor with a group of good friends). Cameron was really still not up to it so he stayed home with Grandma and Grandpa. Sunday Grand Carol took Charli to the mall, so you know it was a good day for her. Cameron had a playdate with Nathan. Cam really just hung around all weekend, making some final changes to his list.

Monday was a good day at PT, we went to Target after PT and wore him out. Tuesday we hung around. Cameron taught Grandpa how to play connect 4. (Cameron beat up on him pretty bad, but he caught on and won a few.) Wednesday we got up to go to school for the holiday pancake breakfast. Cameron was really excited to go and eat! He was looking for the sausage and eggs, etc like they do at IHOP though. When we returned, the neighbors had it set up for lights to be put on our house again this year. (See the November 2004 entry about the lights.) Our neighbors constantly surprise us with anything we need and always help out! We are so lucky to be here.

Yesterday, we had a visit from our good friends from New Jersey, the Alverados. Cameron loves the kids. They have two older boys that he used to always love to hang out with. (He was a little grumpy, but I know he was happy to see them.) We had a lot of fun, it was a really good day.

Today we were headed to school, but he fell asleep when I went to gather some things. As soon as I laid him down, he wanted to watch TV and school became history. (I thought that was a funny little pun.) His teacher, Miss Vernon came to visit today. So did Ms. Clark and Michaela.

I keep getting e-mails about kids that became angels these past few weeks (I’m part of a brainstem glioma message board.) Please pray for these families. Not that there is a good time to lose your child, but the holiday season must be even harder.

Also, pray for my brother and his family. He left for the Middle East on Saturday. (One week before Christmas!!! He has three little children.) It’s so not fair! I pray that he will be safe. I know that his wife will be fine this year, she’s pretty tough.

And lastly, pray for our family, this is getting harder and harder. I’m starting to feel like sleeping is wasted time. Him not getting around is hard on us and sometimes he’s hard to understand. You can see the changes happening and there really is nothing we can do. One good thing is that he never complains and you don’t feel sorry for him because he loves being pampered. He loves people feeding him and waiting on him. He loves to have you stretch his foot. And boy does he love being carried around (always has). He can still do the things he really likes to do and it’s a good thing.

Sorry for the long update. I will add pictures this weekend. If I don’t update….

PLEASE!!! HAVE A MERRY MERRY WONDERFUL AND JOYOUS CHRISTMAS!!!! Even if you don’t celebrate Christmas, use that day to spend time with family!

Thursday, December 15, 2005 8:50 PM CST

Wow – two updates in one week. I’ll pretty much do anything to avoid house work.

We are having a good week so far. Cameron had a great Physical Therapy session with Jason this week. Poor Jason lightened up and Cameron was so happy, they played Connect Four (one of Cameron’s favorites) and in return Cameron did two laps for him. It was a great compromise. Cameron actually fell asleep while Jason was stretching him so he was well rested for his session. (I don’t think that Jason’s ever had someone fall asleep on him.)

Tuesday, Charli took a mental health day and we attended a Christmas Party at the hospital. We then went out to lunch and a trip to this pottery place in town. It was a very fun day. It was so great having Charli help me with Cameron and we laughed a lot. Charli got a lot of great presents at the party too, so she was happy.

Wednesday, Cameron’s Occupational Therapist (Robin) gave him a card holder so he can play cards better. (Watch out now Michaela!!) It’s made of wood and really awesome. People are so nice.
Today he played Cards with Lori and beat her in Uno and Connect Four. He also beat me in the GameCube Game. His friend, Quinn came over and we baked cookies for the hospital. Our friends the Blooms came over too. It was a house full, all of us in the kitchen. I’m bummed that I didn’t’ put the holiday music on. I guess we will have to do it again.

Tomorrow is chemo again, and of course we are expecting a storm. An ice storm! We will see what we get in the morning. We have so much planned for the weekend; I hope all goes well tomorrow.

Thanks for checking in on us. Please keep us in your prayers!!! We really need them.

Please add Josiah and his family to your prayers. Josiah earned his wings this week. His father has awesome spiritually comforting journal entries.

Sunday, December 11, 2005 11:12 PM CST

Over due update! Sorry about that, it’s just been a little busy this week. First off – Cameron is doing great. We decided on Wednesday to start a treatment that was recommended by a few Dr.’s. Our decisions were rather limited due to time constraints, unfortunately this little tumor beast is rather potent (for lack of a better word). When it gets going, it’s going pretty strong so we are pressed for time to make a decision. So, we went with what we had and believe that God closes doors that aren’t meant to be open. So…Friday we started on out next therapy. Three chemo drugs – this time by infusion rather than taking pills. We will have chemo at the hospital every Friday – the first two with all three drugs and then the next weeks on an alternating schedule. Unfortunately we were hit with a major snow storm Friday so Aunt Toni and I headed to the hospital in a little blizzard with Cameron. (We only live about 4 miles from the hospital and I drive a truck with four-wheel drive, so don’t feel that sorry for us.) The infusion was going to take 4-5 hours, but the chemo wasn’t ready and then they had to call all over to find out what order to give the medicine in (these drugs haven’t really been tested on children to treat brain tumors combined-they’ve been tested on adults together and children separately – so it’s rather new). We were there from 10-6. However the hospital has a new infusion room and it was really awesome. Cameron was so happy when he got there, he loved the hospital bed, it had his own flatscreen TV, with Computer access and there were games. He kept moving his head and his feet up. I don’t even think he noticed that medicine going in him. He ordered food and ate pizza, chicken nuggets, mozzarella sticks, french fries, chips and had soda. (He didn’t eat all of that – just a little of each) He was really happy up there, until about 5 we were all ready to go home. Oh, then they made it so he didn’t even have to get up to go to the bathroom –all day he kept saying – ‘yeah and awesome’. He watched a movie with his head phones on and just laughed a lot. Strange to say it, but it was a good day, in spite of the circumstance. He truly knows how to find fun. It was great that Aunt Toni was there, we took turns running to get snacks and stuff – I actually took a nap. He has not been sick all weekend, not one bit. (They said he might be for the first 24-48 hours) He's been so happy having Aunt Toni around.

By the way – the schools were closed for the snow. Charli was so happy. She jumped up, had her snow stuff out and the phone calls started around 8:30. She couldn’t even wait until 9:30 for us to give her a ride to her friends, she walked; in the snow. She called to check in a few times, and check on Cameron, but we didn’t see her until 8:30 that evening. She had a great day with her friends. Saturday she went to the mall with Aunt Toni with a glow in her eye!

Charles and I went out Thursday and Friday night while Toni watched the kids and we laughed a lot. Today we had a get together with some neighbors and friends, it was really nice. We are all hanging in there. Please pray for our miracle (not that we haven’t had an abundance of them this past year). We need it now.

Please keep all our friends in your prayers as well.

Tuesday, December 6, 2005 9:10 AM CST

Just a quick update, the MRI showed that the tumor is no longer stable. We are working on our next step. Cameron is doing fine. We got him a megaphone because we can’t hear him (he’s always been a soft talker). He thinks it’s a toy and has been having a ball yelling. He talks really close to it so it sounds like the guy on the train that you can’t hear what stop you’re at.

We had a great weekend! Sue has our tree and house looking so festive. Aunt Tami watched Cameron a lot so we could get things done. It was a lot of fun.

Now we have about 17 days until Christmas and the pressure is building. I really need to start clicking. (order gifts online)

Thanks for all your prayers!

Friday, December 2, 2005 7:26 AM CST

December? We are blessed!!!!

So far it's been a good week. Cameron is in pretty good moods ‘most’ of the time and that kinda puts us all in a good mood. Charli is doing great. She is a wonderful daughter. She had basketball practice yesterday and she just always seems to find fun in everything. She smiles and laughs all the time.(Ok-most of the time) She really loves people.(OK - most people). She's just a pleasure.

Cameron has been to school twice this week so far. I could have pushed him on Wednesday, but choose to let him chillax (that's chill and relax). We saw Dr. Hagstrom today and he thinks Cameron looks good. He also notices that his left side is a little weaker, but not enough to worry. We moved the MRI to Monday (12/5) because of scheduling and before we increase his dosage, we want to make sure the medicine is actually working. I think it will be good news for Christmas.

The funniest thing that we noticed this week was that Cameron walks so much better for Charles than anyone else. He was taking steps across the floor with out Charles holding him. It’s incredible. He leans on poor Charli and I like he can’t even stand. He told Charles that he’s scared that we might drop him!!! (not that I haven’t let him fall before). Must be a guy thing, but we know he can do it.

My cousin, Tami and her daughter Logan are coming to visit for the weekend. We have reservations at Ginza’s tonight. Some very nice person, who remains anonymous, gave us a VERY generous gift card. Cameron can’t wait; he hasn’t had Ginza’s in three weeks. My friends from NJ, Sue and Jen are coming to help decorate on Saturday. It will be a busy house, I better start looking for my Christmas music.

Please keep up in your prayers, especially on Monday for our MRI. Keep all of our friends in your prayers – Justis, Sydney, Sam, David and Josiah and all of our friends that have become Angel (I’m so sad to say that that list is too long, actually even if there were only one – it’s too long.) Please ask God to provide them with some peace and comfort each day.

Thanks for checking in!

Monday, November 28, 2005 7:21 AM CST

Thanksgiving is over. Boy do we have a lot to be thankful for. Each day when I kiss my kids, I thank God for that day. Thanksgiving was really nice; we were at Uncle Marc & Aunt Geri’s house with a lot family. I wanted to burst out in the prayer and just yell all the things that were running through my mind that I was thankful for and they should be thankful for, but I kept my emotions under control, some prayers are meant to be private between one and their Maker.

We left on Wednesday and packed up and slept somewhere different each night. First at Aunt Toni’s, then Marc & Geri, then Grandmas then back to Aunt Toni’s and then home. Each place we relaxed and ate well. Charli seemed to be fighting off something because she slept so much this weekend and had a little cough; she seemed to be better this morning, excited about going to school. Cameron had PT today and was just too pooped to go to school (he did get a little extra energy when I told him he could stay home). He seems to be the same as he was a week ago. We really need to work harder on getting him into an exercise routine; I think that he would have much better mobility if we worked his muscles.

Well, December is almost here and besides our calendar filling up, I’m going to clean today and pull out decorations!!! My friend Sue is coming on Saturday to help decorate and Cayden’s grandma bought us an 8 foot Spongebob for the front yard. I can’t wait. I hope that our house has a constant flow of company. We have visitors planned for the next 3 weekends. We are trying to find a time to have a get-together.

We see Dr. Hagstrom on Thursday for a check up and we will decide whether to move up our Jan MRI date up.

Please keep us in your prayers and all the families that have sick children or are spending this holiday season without their children. Don’t forget to be thankful for the everyday things!!

Monday, November 14, 2005 6:35 PM CST

Again, I find myself speechless! What an incredible day yesterday was!!

First I must update on the week. Cameron has had a good week. We had a personal tour of the Lego Factory that is here in Connecticut. It was awesome and Cameron had a great time. He always seems to find some extra energy to do what he likes. We got to meet Master Lego Builders (that build the big Lego structures). It was interesting and fun. There was a really funny builder named Dan that was just the funniest man ever. Cameron and I still keep laughing at this attacking bunny that he gave us. Cameron’s favorite part of the trip was that we got to see Lego toys that aren’t out yet. (We can’t tell you about them though.) He also loved seeing all the machines that packaged the Legos and to top it all off…..they gave him money to buy whatever he wanted!!!! He was ecstatic. We spent 45 minutes in their store while he picked and carefully chose all the things he wanted. It was great to see him so happy.

The rest of the week was pretty good also. Unfortunately we did have to increase the steroids, but Cameron is still happy and we’ve seemed to have found some happy medium - he is not walking up to par, but not suffering from the unpleasant side effects. He’s getting around slow, with help, but getting around nonetheless. He’s still eating tons of shrimp and very happy.

Charli had friends come this weekend. We also had Alex and Alana (their cousins from Maryland.) Cameron asked everyday when they are coming! He loves to have them here. It was a busy weekend. We went to see Chicken Little and of course went to Ginza’s. It was really fun…

That leads up to Sunday….It was the Smile A Mile for Cameron. It was fabulous. I don’t know what more we could have asked for (except all the friends and family from all over the country that couldn’t make it!). First of all, the weather was beautiful. Kelly and Mitch from Swim Across the Sound did a wonderful job getting everything together. It was such a great event. It was like a really good dream with just wonderful people there.

They gave Cam a chair (throne), he did one lap on Charles’ shoulders and then sat on his throne and signed shirts like he was a king. He was so happy! It was like just seeing friend after friend after friend. It was so great. Not to get to sentimental, but it was just awesome to see Charli’s friends and Charles’ friends and co-workers and my friends and then all the wonderful people from school and the neighborhood, it was just moving. As awful as the thought that he may not be here one day is, it is so great to know that he has lived this year and this day was like a dream. He was a star and people treated him like that. We were so proud of him and all of our friends!!

Well, it’s taken me all day to update. Thanks for your continued prayers and support. To all my special friends that helped and picked up things for me and made me take their help – Thank you!!!

Monday, November 7, 2005 8:51 PM CST

There are so many things I need to update. Cameron is doing fine. The steroid wean is going slow, but we are down to 1 mg/day. I see little changes, but not sure if I’m just paranoid. I’ll have to ask Charles what he thinks – he’s the practical one.

We had a great weekend. When Cameron got home there was a huge box from Nickelodeon – filled with SpongeBob things. Someone had read the article in the paper here. It had everything in it. Shirts, pajamas, videos, A CD player (which Cameron just asked for), books, those invisible pen books and Cameron’s favorite thing – SpongeBob Uno Cards. He asks everyone to come play Uno with him. It was like Christmas. These are people that we don’t even know!! I hope they know how happy they made us. Later, we went to Ginzas. Cameron ate everybody’s shrimp –even the leftovers on Charli’s friends’ plate. I was scared that he was going to start asking strangers, “Excuse me – are you going to eat those?” It was very funny because they throw shrimp at you to catch in your mouth. Cameron usually catches it, but he missed it this time and it landed on the table. He looked at me and said, “At least it didn’t fall on the floor and I can eat it!!”

Saturday was the best. Cameron’s friend Nathan had a party at the Great Escape – which is a playscape and arcade around here. I guess since walking is somewhat of a challenge – climbing through balls was out of the question. So, they gave Cameron extra tokens!!! He was so excited. Nathan’s older brother Sam, took Cameron all around and helped him so I could sit down and chat. It was very nice. Sam was wonderful! He’s only 12, but very mature. The staff at the Great Escape was incredible. They made Cameron feel so special. He got whatever he wanted and was lovin’ it. The smile didn’t leave his face. It was so great to see. Nathan’s mom mentioned the walk (I’ll tell you about that later in this update) and the staff decided they were going to collect all their tips for this week and donate them!!! Tell me how special that is!!!!!!! These are kids – not adults!!! Cameron picked a foam archery set and I was so bummed because I thought he wouldn’t be able to use it, but since I’ve been struck quite a bit, it reminds me to never doubt Cameron’s will.

There is an organization called SwimAcrosstheSound that has done quite a bit for us. They are sponsoring a walk. “Smile a Mile for Cameron”. It’s this Sunday 11/13/05 at the track at St. Joeseph’s College here in West Hartford at 12:00 (registration is earlier.) and it should be a lot of fun. If you are in the area – Please come out to support us! It should be a lot of fun. If you miss it – don’t worry. There will be another event soon.

I must add that I’ve met a new boy in CT with this tumor, his name is David. Once he gets his web page up – I will link you to it. Please add Sydney to your special prayers – we need the medicine to start working.

Again, thanks for checking in. We are having some really good smiley days, thank God!!! We have a tour of the Lego factory tomorrow! It should be fun.

By the way – I didn’t mention Charli. She’s doing great! She had fun with her friends this weekend. We are so lucky – she’s a good girl.

Thursday, November 3, 2005 12:10 AM CST

Boy these days have been flying by… it’s November already. The weekend was good. I can’t even remember what we did. I’m sure I cooked shrimp, Cameron ate shrimp, Charli was out with her friends and Charles watched football on Sunday. Those things happen every weekend.

Halloween was fun. Cameron had a field trip to a farm on Monday. He had a lot of waking to do. We brought the wheel chair, but him in the wheel chair over the gravel was just not happening; so his classmates helped and he had to walk. He enjoyed seeing the animals and learning about carnivores, herbivores and omnivores. I know he learned a lot and it was a beautiful day in West Hartford.

Cameron didn’t wear a costume. I knew that day would come. He has never liked wearing them. He wore a t-shirt with a skeleton skateboarding. As long as the skeleton wasn’t creepy! We did most of our street and the adjoining circle, but he really only wanted to go to certain houses and then came home happy with the candy that he got. Charli – that’s a whole different ball game. She got her costume about a month ago. She went with her friends and I think she had to go to every house in West Hartford. Every year that I can remember – Charli went out with friends for the whole night and Cameron stayed home content with just a little candy.

Cameron has had a pretty good week. Jason worked him hard in Physical Therapy and Cameron hung in there and even did extra. He was so good. Jason asked me about Cameron’s cardio at home and I was wondering if playing playstation or walking to the table were considered cardio. (I know I would!!) So, now Cameron has walking to do every day. I really think it will help him. That weight has him working so hard to do everything. Our neighbor, Rachel and her friend Dakota took Cameron for a walk yesterday and he did one more lap than I asked him to. He is such a trooper!!

We are all doing so well and so glad to be making plans for Thanksgiving now. I started making a list of thank you notes that I’ve fallen behind on and thinking how wonderful people are. People just doing small things – dropping off soup, taking Cameron for a walk, making me get out of the house (preferably not until 2 am any more ladies), helping to straighten up and picking up some things on your way out. It just makes this easier on us and we are grateful.

Please continue to keep us in your prayers and all of our other friends that we have met on this journey.

Saturday, October 29, 2005 1:25 PM CDT

We are off to a good weekend. It’s actually been a pretty good week. Cameron made it to school – 4 out of the 5 days. (I think) He actually stayed on Wednesday until the end of the day. He complains about going, but seems OK when he gets there. He is doing very well. He is still moving slow (very slow) and loses balance quite a bit. Any step or elevation seems to be a problem. His right hand still trembles quite a bit, but doesn’t stop him from writing or playing games. I think the weight gain makes him more tired than the medicine does. I’m not sure what makes him so thirsty, but he drinks a lot and goes to the bathroom a lot; about 4-5 times throughout the night.

His spirits, for the most part, are pretty good. He laughs a lot and still acts silly. He gets really tired, but just seems to have too much to do here at the house to sleep much.

The rest of us are doing well. Charli is busy with school and her social activities – or should I say Charli is busy with her social activities and school. The order seems to be a little out of place these days, but we will work on that. She’s a great kid. She’s figured out that if she’s playing with Cameron – I’m not going to make her stop to clean her room. So they spend quite a bit of time hanging out.

I almost forgot that we had an MRI of his spine yesterday. It’s not likely that there are any tumors there, but it was unlike that there were new tumors outside of his brainstem also, so we just wanted to check. It really wouldn’t change our course of action. The medicine goes where it is needed. (Pretty awesome huh?)

Thanks for all the prayers – please continue to pray for our family and all of our friends.

Tuesday, October 25, 2005 7:36 PM CDT

I hate these updates, but I must...our good friend Calvin earned his wings today. It is heartbreaking! Please say a prayer for his family.

Cameron is doing well. Spent some time at school today. He's walking better so we are going to try the steriod wean again.

Please pray for all the kids and their families!

Thursday, October 20, 2005 7:56 PM CDT

****** UPDATE********
Great News! The tumor looks ‘better’! That’s what the Doctor said. That is such great news. The medicine is working. We have more time!

Cameron was incredible today. He couldn’t eat after 7:00 this morning. We started at the hospital at 9. I forgot to put numbing cream on his hand, but he handled it like a man! No crying - nothing! (OK there was some monetary incentive, but I know it hurt). He had his MRI and was wonderful. Then to another place for a PET scan – where he had to sit for an hour – no TV, no Gameboy, no writing reading or talking. For one hour!! I had a hard time doing that. Oh yeah – he wasn’t supposed to sleep! He was awesome! He had his PET scan and was still happy at 1:30. He patiently waited until we got lunch and then had to run around with me and Charli. It was a long day and he’s been truly incredible.

Thank you so much for the prayers!! They worked!!

********************
Quick update… I updated the pictures. We have had some really good days! Cameron has been in great spirits. We’ve had a lot of laughs even dancing. He’s been to school for a few hours and doesn’t even want to use the wheelchair. Charli has been so helpful. God is Good. We are happy. Cameron has been remarkable – not sweating the small stuff. He guides our moods.

Cameron’s hair has been falling out – so Charles shaved it off tonight. Which really isn’t a big deal because Cameron gets his head shaved quite often and he doesn’t really have that much. He has a very cute head!

Our MRI is tomorrow. Please pray for good news. Pray that the medicine is working. Pray that we are comforted no matter what we hear. Pray that Cameron continues to be happy and our family continues to count on each other and remain strong.

Monday, October 17, 2005 11:21 PM CDT

Wow! We are home. I don’t know where to begin. It was a great trip. This is going to be a long update.

We got to the Nickelodeon Hotel Wednesday night after a wonderful flight on Song (Delta Airlines). Song is awesome with the individual TV’s. The Nickelodeon hotel is amazing. If you have children, you should definitely go.

It was such a different trip than we normally take. Not too much was planned and we really went with the flow. Thursday , after a room change (the first room didn’t have Play Station in it) and a leisure breakfast we went to Universal Studios. That was fun. We made Cameron get on the Jimmy Neutron Ride – which really wasn’t a ride, the chair just moved as we watched a movie. He was so scared, but loved it once it started. He laughed and cheered when we captured the alien. It was really fun. Then we got on the Shrek 4-D and he had fun on that also! Then, he was tired. He fell asleep in his wheelchair so Charles let him rest then took him to see breakdancers while Charli and I got on a few more rides. (He loved the breakdancers and got their autographs!) We saw a really cute Planet Animal show and then went back to the hotel. When people talk about finding a new ‘normal’, that’s what they mean. We normally would have opened and closed the park. Thursday night Charli and I went to the Haunted House at Universal. It was so scary! We had a great time.

Friday, Cameron’s cousins – Trey, William and Asia came to visit from Tallahassee. They had breakfast together and then went to the pool. Cam was not in a good mood at all. He wanted to be in the room. It was really sad because I know 3 weeks ago; he would have been in there having fun with the rest of them. (He loves shallow pools!) He covered his head with a towel until Charles took him miniature golfing. (He hit two hole-in-ones!!). The hotel is so amazing, they have these poolside shows every hour or so where they dance and pull kids from the pool for trivia games and sliming and pie faces. It was awesome!!! He did stay for a short while to enjoy part of one of the shows. He went back to the room and took a nap and was back to Cameron by the evening when they all went to the arcade. He really liked that – he even walked around a bit there. (He still seems to lose his balance, but with the low dose of the steroids, he’s actually doing pretty well!)

Saturday, Cameron met two of his second cousins TJ and Tyra that he had never met before. He was so excited to meet TJ because he too loves Playstation. A really close friend (my other mother) gave us passes to see Tiger Woods at a golf workshop. Charles, my cousin Tyler, and the kids went and said it was awesome. There were Army parachute’s (Charles is going to be mad that I didn’t use the correct term) and fireworks and they were right near Tiger (but behind a fence). Unfortunately, Cameron didn’t feel great on the way home, but we won’t get into the details, but thanks Tyler for being so understanding! Cameron came home and rested while the other kids played at the pool. Which was great because Charli wouldn’t do anything without Cameron - she was so wonderful and she loves to swim. She really made some sacrifices. The hotel was so kind to let our visitors use the facilities. It just really made the trip special!

Cameron’s cousin TJ is 9 and I’m not sure what his parents told him about Cameron being sick, but he sure is one great kid. Unfortunately, earlier he was a direct witness to Cameron being sick and he even helped his dad clean up – which is lot for a 9 year old that is not living in the cancer world. That night at the arcade, every ticket he won he gave to Cameron. It was such a genuine act of kindness it bought tears to my eyes. With all the gifts there to win it was just heartwarming to see the compassion and selflessness. I was so proud and he’s not my child!

Sunday was our breakfast with the characters, it was fun! We fed the fish (they have a pond with HUGE catfish), went back to the arcade and then just hung around all day. We took a trip to TGIFridays for dinner and had a bunch of laughs!

Now we are home, back to this chilly weather, but it’s not raining anymore and it’s actually pretty beautiful. Overall, the trip was great. Even though it wasn’t how we would have planned it, things rarely are and we just adjusted and had a great time. We laughed a lot and took fun pictures. The trip confirmed my belief that his world is full of really good people that really want to help.

Our MRI is Friday, so please keep us in your prayers. I’ll finish working on the pictures tomorrow. Thanks for checking in on us.

Sunday, October 16, 2005 7:51 AM CDT

One more day left. We are having fun. We will update when we return with fun pictures! The weather is great!!

Thanks for checking in.

Monday, October 10, 2005 7:59 PM CDT

I thought I had just updated and it’s been five days. Not too much to report. We are all hanging in there. Cameron didn’t have a great weekend and woke up this morning having trouble with balance again. He needs assistance walking. We saw Dr. Hagstrom this morning and he thinks we still shouldn’t go back on the steroids because, even if they help him to walk, he’s pretty miserable on them. Hopefully the medicine should really start kicking in soon. He’s been pretty happy yesterday and today. We’ve been playing board games and he’s back to laughing continuously at the whoopi cushion. Last week he didn’t even think that was funny.

We are getting anxious about our trip to Orlando. The Nick hotel looks awesome on the web and I’ve heard nothing but good things about it. We are going to have visits from our cousins and we are flying Song, which is pretty fun. I’m going to try to get Cameron to take a few naps on Wednesday so he can stay up later. The hotel has a lot of fun Halloween events planned.

Well, please, please keep us in your prayers. It hurts us so much for him not to be able to walk alone, but his laughter is music to our ears. Charles and I smile at each other every time we hear him cracking up at something on TV or a game he’s playing or something silly Charli and him are doing. We thank God everyday for our wonderful family.

Please don’t forget all of our tumor friends and all the other people that are suffering from all these natural disasters. It’s really a reminder that our time here on earth is short and tomorrow is not a guarantee. Tell your kids, family and friends how happy you are to have them today!!!

Wednesday, October 5, 2005 9:25 PM CDT

**Finally some new pictures!!**

Thanks for checking in on us. We are all doing well. Cameron seems to be tolerating the new medicine well still. You can tell his body is not up to par, but he insists he’s a 10 on a scale of 1 to 10. (It used to be 100 on a scale of 1 to 10.) His little belly is just getting bigger and bigger. I think he’s gained 10 lbs in 12 days.

Monday he was really sad until Charles came home with a bag of Legos from the Gee family at his job. Cameron perked right up and stayed up so late working on them. He woke up at 12am and wanted to play some more. He was so happy, because it was a bag full of really neat Lego things. He was so excited he pretended to faint and we were so glad to see him silly again.

Tuesday the kids were off of school for Rosh Hashanah. We went to Ginzas for lunch; Cameron’s favorite place to eat. He woke up at midnight wondering how many hours until lunch. Then he got a special treat because his friend Alyssa went with us. I added some pictures. It was really fun – like always. He ate his shrimp and some of each of ours. Sorry Alyssa!!

Today he went to school for quite a few hours. He was really tired when he came home and just wanted to sit at the computer and work on adding and deleting things on his Christmas List and of course a plate of shrimp with ginger sauce.

I just scheduled our MRI for October 21. I am expecting a miracle then. It’s pretty unlikely that the new tumors will shrink, just stop growing. I’ll take either, but I have a feeling……

Please keep us in our prayers. I added a new friend Justis
for our prayer requests. He’s really cute! Don’t forget my buddies – Calvin, Sydney and Josiah. Please add a prayer for Andrea – she is missing Ryan
and her husband is now overseas with the Army missing him as well.

Monday, October 3, 2005 7:26 AM CDT

Sunday was another pretty good day! No real side effects from the chemo or other medicine. Cameron is still not totally himself, but he has had fun doing what he loves to do. He was feeling pretty down so the neighbors let him spray them with a hose. Boy did that make him happy. Then he got so lazy that he sat in a chair and he pointed to who he wanted to spray and our neighbor Rachel sprayed them, like he was some king or something. I guess it doesn’t matter, because he had a great time. The neighbors came and pulled him right out of his funky mood. It was great to see him laugh and be outside.

I will add the pictures of miniature golf on Saturday and yesterday’s water play in a little while.

He’s upstairs eating a bagel so I better get ready for the morning medicine. Sometimes I get so stressed about putting all that toxic medicine in his body then I hear a giggle from him watching cartoons and as long as he’s happy – we’ll keep trying.

Don’t forget my buddies – Calvin, Sydney and Josiah!!!

Saturday, October 1, 2005 10:09 AM CDT

Wow! What an amazing day yesterday was. First I must ask everyone to please say prayers for Calvin and his family; he has the same tumor as Cameron. You can stop by and leave them a message; it is really comforting to hear from people, it makes you feel like you're not alone.

Yesterday was pretty amazing. I mentioned that the steroids just have Cameron pretty sad (by the way we’ve already started to wean them). Yesterday he didn’t want to go to school, but I knew that his elementary school was observing National Childhood Cancer Awareness Month and showing support for him. When I told him that everyone in the school was wearing yellow to support him and other children with cancer – he perked right up. When we got there it was amazing to see. He had the biggest smile!!! All the children had their yellow/gold on and yellow ribbons. All the students were happy to see him and his face really did explain it all. They had an Alex’s Lemonade Stand during lunch and the children were very happy to be helping. It was so heartwarming. He stayed almost the whole day until he was just too tired. It was a little adrenalin rush, but I don’t think just for him. It was felt throughout the whole school. It was so awesome.

There were two local newspapers there. I added the link to the bottom of the page. We were very proud!

Then last night was the first night of the new medicine. It really is overwhelming. He now has 10 pills to take a day. He took the pills like M&M’s. We told him they would make him better and he really trusts us. I was very stressed reading all the possible side effects. The first night is supposed to be the worst. His Dr. told us they would get better as time goes by and he could sleep until noon today. Well!!! Guess who was up at 5:30 wondering what was for breakfast and what time could he play PlayStation. He was in the best mood ever. He reminded me that he wanted to play miniature golf today and asked could he go wake Aunt Toni up? (She’s not a morning person, but she was very happy to see him at 7 am and even got up to eat breakfast with him.) He is now playing a game with Charli and they are raiding the snack closet and giggling! God is Good!!!

Again, keep up the prayers and don’t forget Calvin, Sydney and Josiah and the many other children and their families –this is so hard on the siblings.

Thursday, September 29, 2005 2:42 PM CDT

Cameron went to school today for a few hours. He was not that grumpy, but was ready to come home. Now that he's walking well, we are weaning the steriods now. (If you don't wean them slowly they can cause a psychotic state!!)

Dana Farber agrees that even though it's different, it is still disease progression and we need to begin some treatment. We will start tomorrow. He will begin what is called a 'cocktail', which are a handful of drugs that have all shown some benefit individually, and are now being tested together. We are testing 5 - not all chemo drugs either. It will be a rough few months, but if its a few months and we have fun and hugs and kisses than we will take it!!! We are going to Florida in two weeks to stay at the Nick Hotel!!!

Thanks for checking in on us and pray that this works!

Wednesday, September 28, 2005 12:42 AM CDT

Thank you all so much for the notes left on the message board and the emails, it really is great to hear from our friends; old and new. Comforting to know all the prayers!

Cameron is still being a trooper, he’s definitely walking better and had better balance, but as expected, the steroids are kickin’ his butt emotionally. So ‘out of sorts’ for Cameron, we get a few laughs and smiles throughout the day, but for a lot of the day he’s just grumpy with one word answers (except when Charles is around). He goes from the table to the TV to the computer. Shrimp – video games – web!

Yesterday we made a trip to Dana Farber Cancer Institute in Boston to meet with a specialist. Cameron was in a good mood with them and was back to himself in front of the doctors. Unfortunately, I really don’t have much to report. They agree that his case is very out of the ordinary course for a dpg (diffuse pontine glioma). Just as we expected and have heard from other doctors around the country, there are quite a few trails out there, but they are all working about the same. (or not working I should say). They too are looking for the miracle cure. Our original plan to use a drug in Germany has been falling through some cracks also. ( I do believe that God closes doors that aren’t meant to be open.) So our plan? Dana Farber has some follow up questions to get back to us and they want to review more information. Thursday morning they will get back to us to decide if a biopsy would be feasible and/or beneficial. (They wouldn’t put Cameron through a procedure that won’t change our course of therapy) John Hopkins agrees to start one of the therapies that we are looking into; so does Children’s Hospital in DC and UCSF in California and a very well known Dr. in Canada.

On my soap box---- I have heard from so many parents how doctors have written them off. We know that nothing has shown any great results, but we have had nothing but a great response from the medical community. We have gotten phone calls and emails all hours of the night and always prompt. The doctors have been compassionate and constantly remind us that even though the statistics are not great, there are long term survivors. All of them have spoken highly of the other doctors and have been so honest about what they don’t know and who to talk to that might be able to help. I have not had one doctor that has reviewed his scan ask for a medical card to collect money. Our oncologist has talked to doctors all over the country this past year and not once made us feel like we were going behind his back. He’s researched and given his opinion, but has not passed any judgment on our decisions, even if they didn’t follow his suggestions. I thought they would all try to get us into their newest trials, but all said to pick one the works the best with the best quality of life. Don’t give up!

PLEASE KEEP UP THE PRAYERS!!! Thanks for checking in.

Wednesday, September 28, 2005 12:42 AM CDT

Saturday, September 24, 2005 10:03 AM CDT

Monday update - The steriods are kicking in. He's walking better on his own. He's a little grumpy, but still having fun playing video games, hanging with Charles and doing web research. He had a big smile when I said he didn't have to go to school today. He's eating shrimp with his special garlic sauce 3-4 times a day. (12-20 shrimp each time) Grand Carol is here and will have to learn how to cook it like he likes it. He's been singing and being silly. He is such a blessing!

Thank you so much for all the notes - it really helps!

************
I apologize for the curt update, but we are truly pretty devastated. Even though you know something’s coming, it doesn’t hurt you until it actually hits you!

We are back on the Decadron (steroids) and hopefully Cameron will be back to walking unassisted in a few days. For now, he’s still Cameron, playing video games and excited about not going to school for a few days. (Our neighbor bought us a whoopee cushion and it brings us side stitching laughter all day.) He insists on trying to walk alone, but he walks like he’s had a quart of Tequila. So we have to stay close to him. He even attempted to do the Dance Mat today, not very successfully, but he has some determination. He has not complained once about this obvious inconvenience. Medically, he has a new tumor spot on the part of the brain that affects his balance; consequently walking and standing are a bit of a challenge.

We are going to try every bit of modern medicine that his little body can take and still remain our ‘full of life’ little boy. Now is not his time! I know that in my heart. He’s been working on a Christmas List since July. Right now, we still continue to ask God for strength for our family and to guide us in the right direction.

Please continue to pray for Calvin, Sydney, and Cameron as they are all in very similar situations!!! (and I’m so glad to have met their mothers).

Thanks for the notes that people have left. It really does feel good to know how many people are praying for us.

Friday, September 23, 2005 10:44 AM CDT

Just thought that I would give you a quick update; Cameron has had a set back. He was having trouble walking and we had an MRI done last night which showed the tumor is no longer stable. We are not sure of our next step, but PLEASE pray for a miracle.

Thanks for checking in.

Tuesday, September 20, 2005 3:17 PM CDT

Sorry for not updating! All is going well. The weekend was really fun. We went to a Red Sox game. It was awesome. One of our friends from Boston, Mark, had a friend give us a private tour. It was very interesting. We went on the field and learned all about the old stadium. We got to go on the Green Monster (baseball fans will know what that is). It was really fun. Cameron fell asleep after chemo at the stadium and slept through all those loud fans. Red Sox fans are crazy!!!

Sunday we had our neighborhood block party. It was so fun, unfortunately Cameron was in a cranky mood and wanted to stay home and play video games. He’s been in a pretty good mood these last few days.

Today he got hit in the head with a soccer ball so I had to go pick him up. He’s fine; I think he was just a little upset. I was glad to hear he was having fun playing soccer and so thankful that he’s running and playing!

Thank you for checking in on us. I promise to update pictures this week.

Friday, September 16, 2005 6:37 AM CDT

TGIF! Charli and Cameorn are both happy it's Friday. All went well with the Dr. on Tuesday. Charles even scheduled his next MRI (at 7:00 AM - only Charles would do that) on October 10th. Chemo is going well. Cameron seems a bit off this week, a little grumpy and a little slower. He's becoming more and more obsessed with video games. He really doesn't want to do anything but play them or buy them. I don't think he's watched Spongebob all week. It hurts me to tell him to stop playing because he gets so upset, but that's what Moms do - upset their kids.

Thanks for checking in and signing the guest book. Please continue to keep us in your prayers.

Carla

Monday, September 12, 2005 9:23 AM CDT

It was a beautiful weekend in Connecticut. We really didn't do much; played outside with the neighbors.

Cameron played minature golf with Mrs. Clark and her family. He was very excited! He hit a hole-in-one.

Charli went to the Green Day concert and had another friends' Batmitzvah this weekend. She looks so pretty all dressed up!

We see Dr. Hagstrom tomorrow and start our week of chemo on Tuesday - it should be pretty uneventful. Cameron looks good!

Thanks for continuing to check on us!

Friday, September 9, 2005 8:23 AM CDT

All is well with our family. Cameron is still complaining about going to school every morning, he just wants to stay home and play video games. Charli is loving the social part of school – so far she’s very happy with all her teachers and her friends.

I am very sad that our very dear friend Therese passed away yesterday after a very short, but courageous fight with cancer and its complications. So many memories came to my mind – she and Mike spent Christmas morning with us for a few years before their own children. We were like family. I know she’s no longer in pain and that she’s in a better place, but I will miss her so much. Sometimes I feel like I’m reading a book and that my life isn’t really happening, this is not a good chapter! She had so much to teach people about being a friend and a good Christian. She opened her door to anyone; even if it wasn’t convenient for her. She really liked to be around people. Please say a prayer for Mike, her husband, and their two sons, Jack and Joseph. They are only 6 and 4 years old.

Needless to say – I came home and kissed my kids! I’m really getting sick of cancer!!

Please keep us in your prayers.

Tuesday, September 6, 2005 8:10 AM CDT

Not much to update. Cam did so well in school last week. He took the bus there and home and played outside after that. He really is doing well. He seems strong and happy! He really likes his new teacher, Miss Vernon.

We had a very relaxing long weekend. Cameron spent all his money on video games!! I had to make him go outside to play in this beautiful weather.

Charli spent the whole weekend hanging with her friends, we hardly saw her at all.

Let's pray for another great week.

Thanks for checking in. Please stop by and leave Calvin a note - he's not doing so well. www.caringbridge.org/ga/sugarbear

Thursday, September 1, 2005 10:43 AM CDT

Yeah! Today is the first day of school. Charli and Cameron got on their buses and I hope are having a great day. It’s kinda sad that the summer is almost over. We will have to shove something really fun into this weekend.

Charli had the best time at Camp. When I got home, she couldn’t stop talking about it. She met great people and did so many fun things.

Cameron and Charles did get to play golf, but I really didn’t get any details, they both just said they had fun! (Men!!) They played video games and had ‘eggs on bread’ (the only thing Charles really cooks that Cameron will eat).

Charli and Cameron both had a great time at their sleep over at the Blooms. I feel really bad that Cameron made them go out and get pork chops and Shake and Bake; and then decided that they didn’t look like mine and ate canned chicken noodle soup with the chicken picked out (thanks for picking that 'stuff' out Bill). Bill said he was up at 5:00 wanting to play Monopoly; Bill actually played with him!! (Sucker) He’s not allowed to wake us up until 7:00.

Las Vegas was awesome and my friend was a beautiful bride, I missed my family, but needed to not think about cancer for a few days. (It’s so loud there – you can’t think about anything.)

I joined a message board about brain tumors and I keep meeting parents of children with this tumor. I really hope that a cure comes really soon!!! Please pray for one.

Thanks for checking in. Please sign the guest book

Friday, August 26, 2005 10:38 PM CDT

It was a good week. Cam & I hung out. We took a few day trips… to Target. (of course to buy video games). We hung out with the neighbors mostly. Cameron had PT in the pool. We are going to start doing that weekly. He really likes it, his new therapist is Jason. Kim, the old one, is pregnant and due any day now.

I’m going to a good friends wedding in Vegas so Charles will have to update what was done around here all weekend. I know Cameron wants to play golf with his daddy, he said he wants to hit balls and play with Dad. Charli comes home on Sunday and both kids are having a sleepover at the Blooms. Cameron loves sleepovers and he loves the Blooms. He’s going to have a good weekend.

This week I heard from a few more parents of children with a diffuse pontine glioma. The list continues to grow – please say prayers for Sydney, Max,Sam (who I met this week) Josiah, Calvin and Bailey (who I check on daily) . Please pray that we find a cure… soon.

Also, please pray for all the parents out there that are missing their children.

Monday, August 22, 2005 8:00 PM CDT

It was a really good weekend. It’s strange, we didn’t do much, but it was fun and relaxing. Chemo week went well; Cameron remained the same old Cameron. He has just been so happy, it’s such a blessing. It’s sad, but the highlight of the week was spending their Blockbuster Gift Cards from Aunt Mel. Cameron did research on the web all morning for the exact games he wanted to buy and what he wanted to rent. He counted out his money and made his list. Then we got there and they didn’t have it. He was devastated, he kept telling them that blockbuster.com said they did have it and could they check in the back. So, we spent about an hour going through all the other games! It was grueling.

We dropped Charli off at the Hole in the Wall Gang Camp. I miss her already. Cameron gave her 6 kisses for each day and said that he will miss her, but glad that no one will call him a ‘pain in the butt’ all week. Cameron and I went to Chuck E. Cheese’s for a while. 216 more tickets!! Then he wanted pork chops (he loves Shake and Bake and no one else does) – he washed them, shook them, put them in the pan (I baked them) and then ate all three of them. I made him fried rice with plenty of egg (yuk) and he was just happy as could be. There was no compromising the meal with Charli.

Charles is in a golf tournament this week so it will be just me and Cameron. He wants to have a few play dates, so that’s what we’ll do.

I must add to say an extra prayer for a little boy, Josiah that has he same tumor. He needs some extra!! Also a prayer for Rob and his family (remember sweet Melody became an angel in March) who have had more tragedy in their lives this past week. Pray that God gives them strength.

Thanks for checking in– school starts on September 1, 2005. Charli is so excited and Cameron is…….Cameron, is only concerned with the present.

Tuesday, August 16, 2005 9:47 PM CDT

Note from Dr. Hagstrom: The MRI shows no change in the size of the tumor compared with the last MRI.

Good news!!!

God is good!!!

Monday, August 15, 2005 9:49 AM CDT

Sorry so long to update…We are all doing very well. Today is our Dr's appointment, for the first time in a month and our MRI is at 3:00 today.

Last week was full of running around. Cindy and Jen brought Charli home on Tuesday and we all went to the water park on Wednesday. It was so fun!!!
The weekend was a lot of fun – we had a small get together for Charles’ birthday and ordered crabs and had a great time; all of us! Yesterday we went to our friends’ daughter’s birthday party and met a lot of nice new people. Aunt Toni came on Saturday for the party and she’s been here bossing us all around all weekend. It’s great when our house is busy.

Toni and I went to visit a new church on Sunday. It was really good. I can’t wait to go back with the rest of the family. The message was about having faith! As we are almost 11 months into this with no real cure – it was a much needed message. I will be patient. Please keep praying!!

Thanks for checking in. Please sign the guest book!

Tuesday, August 9, 2005 10:51 AM CDT

Wow! I don’t know where to start. It has been an amazing 12 days! I don’t know where to begin!

Our Make-A-Wish! It was incredible. We were picked up in a limo! It was so exciting. They took us to the hotel, where we swam a little before the show. The show was really fun. There were booths of fun things set up to do outside the coliseum – it was fun. We waited for a while then we got into the Pre-show. We saw the skateboarders ,the BMXers and the Motor crossers all practicing. It was so exciting. Then we got to meet Tony Hawk. He was awesome. He sat and talked to Cameron for a while. Cameron asked him questions and he was just so incredibly genuine! I think we all were very excited. He signed Cameron’s skateboard and some other stuff and just hung around. Then we hung around the stadium and waited for the show. It was an action packed two hours. (I think Charles enjoyed it more than any of us!) Even if you are not interested in any extreme sports you would still love the show. It was meticulously choreographed and the stunts were thrilling. It was two hours of ‘oohs’, ‘ahhs’, ‘oh my goodness’ and cheering. We had so much fun. Cameron was so tired after the show, but we woke him up for the after show party to meet some of the other performers. They were just as nice. Tony (that’s what we call him now!) came out and said, “Hey Cam,” Like they were old buddies. It was just a great night! It was really like a wish come true.

The next few days we spent in New Jersey visiting friends from my job and Cameron stayed over Ivy’s house. It was fun to see so many people. We headed from New Jersey to Salisbury, Maryland on Saturday to spend time with Grand Carol, Grandpa Tally, his cousins from Florida, and Christine. We had crabs and went to Chuck E. Cheese’s, we went to the beach and boardwalk in Ocean City one day and played a lot of Play Station with Tre, William and Christine.

We left Salisbury on Tuesday and headed 2 hours to Landover, Maryland to see his other Grandparents, Mom-mom (his great grandmother) and all the other cousins. We got to see his newest cousin, Morgan, she’s only 2 months old. (Cameron is not a real fan of babies so that was rather uneventful for him.) He hung out with Alex, Alana, Daniel and Marcus. Wednesday, we got back in the car and headed to Norfolk, Virginia to celebrate, my great-aunts 98th birthday. (That’s not a mistake – 98!!!– and she still lives by herself and has a better memory than most young folks) We got to meet a lot of relatives neither Charli nor Cameron have met. We went swimming over his second cousin Michelle’s and had so much fun with her and her friends. We got back in the car and went to back to Grandma’s house. Friday, another cousin Logan joined us and Grandma hosted a sleepover with all the cousins. It was a little crazy, but fun. We left on Saturday and stayed in Baltimore with Aunt Toni.
Sunday we headed to West Orange to go to church. It was a great finale to our trip. Pastor gave a wonderfully inspiring message. God is good and has a way of sending you what you need – right when you need it.

We are now home, except Charli who decided to stay in New Jersey with Jenn. We are looking forward to celebrating Charles’ birthday on Saturday and Aunt Toni visiting for a few days.

Cameron has an MRI on Monday. He seems to be doing very well. We will pray for good results!

I am working on adding the pictures.

Please stop by www.leahsjourney.com and leave a message. She earned her wings while we were away.

Monday, August 1, 2005 9:42 PM CDT

Just a quick update to let you know that the Brooks’ are doing good! The family had a wonderful time on the make a wish trip with Tony Hawk and Carla can’t wait to share the pictures and the details. Cameron, Charli, and Carla are still in Maryland spending time in Salisbury with family. They’ve been to the zoo, Chuck E. Cheese, and Ocean City and had been having a great time. Tomorrow they are off to Landover to see more family and friends. Carla will update more when she gets back home.

Thanks for checking in and please continue to pray for a cure!
Aunt Toni

Monday, August 1, 2005 9:53PM CDT

The game was wonderful!! It was so much fun. The organization that sponsored the evening was Swim Across The Sound (www.swimacrossthesound.com). They were so nice. Cameron did a great job. I can't believe he went our there! He was really cute.

About 20 of our neighbors came to cheer his on!!! It was just a really fun night.

I added some pictures.

Tomorrow is our Make-A-Wish - Tony Hawk here we come.

Keep us in your prayers. We will be on the road visiting family and friends, so I probably won't get the pictures up until I return.

Thank you for checking in.

Monday, July 25, 2005 7:46 AM CDT

I know I just updated, but I just had to add a few things.

People have been so incredibly giving and good natured. Everyone that finds out about Cameron’s cancer wants to help in some way. You read on other people’s websites about not being able to thank everyone, it is so true. One of Cameron’s classmates mother (Dawn) works at a restaurant and told one of her customer’s about Cameron and now… he’s throwing out the opening pitch at the New Britain Rock Cats game tonight. We are so excited. It’s actually Cancer awareness night. We are so excited for a few reasons:
1)It will be a fun experience for Cameron
2)It will bring a face to the reality of childhood cancer
3)It will let people with cancer know that they can keep going, just like Lance Armstrong says – Live Strong.

Dawn didn’t have to think of Cameron and her friends sure could have found someone else to have that experience. It will be awesome!!!

Last week when I got the kids pictures taken (at Portrait Simple), I told the photographer about Cameron’s illness. When I went to get my photo they made a special one for us of Cameron! It is adorable!!! (It was worth almost $100) I just cried. As you know, pictures are everything to us! It just captured Cameron’s true personality. It was an awesome thing and to. I can’t thank them enough! www.PortraitSimple.com

I added a picture that I took of the pictures. (I know I’m lame!)

Well, thanks for checking in! I’ll add pictures of tonight’s game.

Please keep us in your prayers.

Saturday, July 23, 2005 9:47 AM CDT

He’s Back!!! This morning Charli and Cameron were playing dance mat, I was cooking breakfast and Charles was washing his car! It was so back to normal – then we sat down and laughed through breakfast. It was great!

Cameron had a great time. He said that he missed us a lot and was sad when he came back to his room, even though he keeps telling funny stories about what the boys did in the cabin. (All centered on bodily functions that 7-10 year old boys think are really funny!) He started off by telling us that he just played video games all week and that was great, but slowly we learned that he went horseback riding, did archery, swam, saw a movie, made a car for a car race and saw a bunch of really fun shows. He sang songs and played a ton of fun games. He’s had a strange little smile on his face, kinda reminiscing. I’m not sure what they did, but I know I unpacked a ton of clean clothes. I’m sure he was happy with no showering pressure for a week. Charli goes the last week of August for just a week of siblings of sick children. She is going to have a ball! I hope that she meets some peers to talk to. I’m sure they all have the same feelings; it has to be so hard for her.

I can tell he had a great time and the counselors said he was a lot of fun and thanked me for sharing him. He is a great little boy. He looks good; the same, still limping and not really using his hand too much and the eyes look the same (oh! He lost his glasses at camp!) Just as crazy!

Well, this week should be very busy. We leave for our Make-A-Wish on Wednesday! We meet Tony Hawk. It will be awesome! We will have a great time. (Even though I still can’t stand the thought of Cameron getting to make a wish, it still doesn’t seem real!) We will then go to New Jersey. Ivy will get to keep Cameron for a day and him sleep over as I promised. (Ivy is like another mom to Cameron, she was his sitter everyday from before he was 2 until 6, while we worked and Charli was in school. She loved him like he was her own. ) Then off to Maryland to visit all cousins and grandparents! It will be a really fun week! I will try to update often.

Thanks for the prayers! He's back and our family is whole!

Tuesday, July 19, 2005 9:59 AM CDT

Mid week update – Cameron is having fun at camp. The Dr. for his area said that he’s very funny and been dancing and stuff – which makes me feel good. She said that he took his chemo and went right off to play and was at the pool now having a blast. He did archery yesterday and there was a show and a campfire. She said he’s really been enjoying the unlimited supply of Doritos (I’m sure the Cool Ranch ones). There is a carnival tonight and he’s pretty excited. I feel a little better now.

Here in Connecticut – Charli and I have been non stop. We went to see the Wedding Crashers (really good), we’ve been at the gym each morning, Six Flags yesterday (I don’t want to talk about the 5 roller coasters!) and off to a water park now and Charli *& the Chocolate Factory tonight. Tomorrow we head into NYC to try to get our poster on the Today Show in the crowd and catch a matinee- we want to see Wicked. Thursday wakeboarding at a friend’s lake house!!! What a week – and Friday we get our baby back! It will be a day of celebration.

Keep us in your prayers!

Sunday, July 17, 2005 5:26 PM CDT

Charli and I dropped Cameon off at Camp yesterday. The staff was great. There was so much going on. We talked with the Dr. that's in charge of his group and then they sent us off. Cameron was so busy playing that he barely said goodbye! It's pretty sad in this house with out him and we can't wait to pick him up Friday at 9:30. I keep asking myself why would I send him to camp for a week? I know it's a great opportunity, but.....

For those of you that don't know - he's at the Hole in the Wall Gang Camp. It's a camp especially for sick kids. There are Dr's and nurse's there. He will do his chemo there this week. It's Paul Newmans camp and part of proceeds from his foods go to run the camp.

I know he will have a great time and Charli and I will get to spend some quality time together.

Please keep us in your prayers!

Thursday, July 14, 2005 3:30 PM CDT

Cameron leaves for camp on Saturday and I am so sad. It's been a busy week. Cameron's class had their 3 week class reunion at a local spray park. It was fun. We dropped Jenn of with her sister and now it's just us running around.

I updated the cover photo. They got pictures taken today. It didn't scan very well, but it's still pretty cute.

Dr. Hagstom said that Cameron looked good and his counts are good also. He will be on chemo while he's away at camp!

Please don't forget to say a prayer for Leah (www.leahsjourney.com)and all the other children and families that are struggling with sick children or have lost their children. Also add my friend Therese to your prayer list, especially for Mike, her husband and Jack and Joseph, her sons. Cancer is no joke!!! It effects so many people. I guess the bottom line is that tomorrow is not promised to anyone! If you are complianing about your life, I can give you a few people to call that would take your problems in a heartbeat. Thank God for all the good things that are going on in your life, all the 'normal' things that we take for granted.

I'll add pictures of Cameron at camp :(

Carla

Sunday, July 10, 2005 10:27 PM CDT

It’s Sunday night and it was an incredible weekend. I couldn’t wait to come unload my pictures and tell everyone about the fun time we had.

This weekend was awesome – I can’t even begin to explain the fun we had at our friend’s house at the beach. First I must explain, it is a breathtaking house with it’s own private beach. We went out on their boat. We did tubing (OK – Cameron didn’t tube, but he did actually get on the boat. Twice! And he sat in the tube for a picture, which is a lot to ask from my very cautious little boy) He was really excited. Charli and Jenn got to go kneeboarding (Charles tried it too). The weather was great and we sat out at night and lit fireworks by the fire pit. It was so awesome. Cameron played in the sand a lot and painted shells. He had a great time. He went to bed early – he was so tired. It was one incredible memory with great friends! I wish I could tell all the stories (like Charles getting thrown out of the tube), but we will save some stories for the live version when friends come to visit. We can’t thank Barb and Glenn enough for the opportunity!

This week, Grandma heads home on Monday and Jenn goes back to NJ on Tuesday. It’s going to be pretty quiet, but Cameron must get ready for camp on Saturday.

I am heart broken to hear that little Ryan earned his wings today. He’s such a cutie – fighter to the end! His parents, Andrea and Phillip need your prayers!!! He is the third child in the last two weeks that this ugly tumor has taken away from their parents. I believe they were all 5 years old.

Please continue pray for our family as well as Cameron. He's doing well! We need a cure! Something!!

Friday, July 8, 2005 2:19 PM CDT

It's been a fun week with Grandma and Jenn still around. We had so much fun at the park - I added some pictures.

Yesterday, Charli and Jenn went to the mall (surprise) and Cameron and I spent two really fun hours at Chuck E. Cheese's. We collected 214 tickets - he's finally agreed to start saving the tickets for something decent rather than wasting them on little cheap toys each time. It was a lot of ski ball. Then we met the girls at the mall and Cameron got to play DDR (the dancing game) on a real machine, I'm mad that I didn't have my camera. He also got to spend a KB Toys gift card and buy some new Legos!

Well, it's chilly and rainy and the girls are babysitting so I think me and Cam are going to have a SpongeBob marathon and cuddle. :)

Please stop by and leave a note for Ryan his caring bridge page is - /ky/ryanbrown. He’s such a fighter.

Please keep us in your prayers – we are going to the beach this weekend with our friends. I hope Cameron will go tubing!!! I can’t wait. People are so great to give us opportunities to do things that we normally wouldn’t do. It’s so hard to try to shove a lifetime in a year.

Tuesday, July 5, 2005 9:28 AM CDT

Happy 4th of July.

It’s been a busy few days. Cameron’s friend Quinn came over on Saturday for a short play date. He was so excited. He has a class list and plans to have a play date with each one of his classmates this summer.

Saturday, we had friends come up from New Jersey to celebrate with us. Grandma Lodie flew in on Friday and cooked and cooked and cooked. We ate and ate and ate. (and will continue to do the same for a while) With our visitors and neighbors it was great to just have kids running all over the place. Charli’s friend Jenn is here to spend a week, Cameron thinks she is here for him. Brianna, Omar and Messiah are all here just like the old NJ days except our new CT neighbors really make it a true posse….just playing and running! Sunday night the neighbors and friends came over and we sat outside with a fire. It was very fun. It was like nothing else mattered, very relaxing.

Charles lit fireworks last night and scared us all. It was so much fun.

Cameron looks good. Yesterday morning he woke up and threw his arms up in the air. (that’s how we test his strength – sometimes he can’t get the left up and has to crank it like a jack – but this morning it went up like normal.) Last week, we went back and forth to the eye Dr. to get those glasses fixed. He still takes them off and won’t wear them.

Well, we are going to a water park today. I’ll update pictures later.

Thanks for your prayers.

Sunday, June 26, 2005 11:19 PM CDT

Tuesday June 28th update.
Heaven has just received another angel from this tumor. Please pray for beautiful Taylor and her family. She is an adorable little 5 year old girl from West Hartford.

*******************

I thought I’d do a quick weekend update. Friday was the last day of school. Summer is here! One of my friends from New Jersey called to tell me that Cameron’s old elementary school had a team on the Fight Cancer Relay for Life this weekend so we planned an impromptu trip to West Orange. New Jersey still feels like home sometimes – especially when we get on the Garden State Parkway. This was West Orange’s first time hosting the walk and the turn out was incredible. I know that most people have been affected by cancer one way or another, but it takes special people to actually get out there and do something! One of Charli’s friends, Lara, is 13 and organized her own team. These kids walked all through the night! I was so proud. Cameron got a survivor shirt and actually cut the ribbon to start the walk. We did the first lap with the survivors and caregivers. I was so proud. Charli and her friends gave Cameron piggy back rides because he didn’t feel like walking. (Except to play with his friends – he’s gotten a little spoiled). It was moving to see all the people that have beat cancer. They all said how long they have been a survivor. I sure pray that we are there next year and Cameron can say he is a 1 year and 9 month survivor. It was a great experience. One of Cameron’s friends Jack stopped by and they ran around and it was just like old times, back when things were normal.

Just as I suspected, Charli didn’t want to come home. We left her in NJ and will pick her up on Tuesday somewhere between here and there. The house is pretty quiet without her. Boy do we miss her.

Charles was in a golf tournament all weekend – he played 27 holes on Saturday and 18 today! It was almost 100 degrees – there is no way golf could be that much fun. Cameron and I didn’t want to even walk to the car it was so hot.

Saturday morning we drove home for Jersey, Cameron had a friend’s birthday party to go to then we went to friends’ house for dinner. He had a great day. Today after church, Cam and I just hung around, ran errands and went to see Madagascar. I think I watched him more than the movie. He laughed at everything. He was so cute. He is a happy little boy. He’s made a list of things to do this week and told me to go to bed early so we could get started – so I better stop writing.

On another note – the little girl Kaidre that I asked everyone to pray for – someone made her up. She’s not real. Someone has some real issues. Unfortunately, there is too much going on in our lives to dwell on this. It’s better that we prayed for her and she doesn’t exist than we didn’t pray for her and she did exist.

Please continue to pray for Ryan and my good friend Therese and their families!

And of course – keep Cameron in your prayers.

Thursday, June 23, 2005 3:31 PM CDT

Great news! Dr. Hagstrom reviewed Cameron’s scans with the radiologist and thinks they look good. The radiologist probably has to error on the side of caution. We had his MRI’s reviewed at UCSF today (thanks to my friend Tracy) and they agree with Dr. Hagstrom that his tumor is stable. UCSF thinks that what the radiologist saw was not tumor regrowth! It was a good wake-up call to remind us how precious time is and how wonderfully supportive our friends and family are! God is in control.

Chemo week is going well. Aunt Toni is still here and we’ve been having fun. We had Japanese for dinner last night and it was really fun and it was really, really good. It was embarrassing that our family was the only ones that caught the shrimp in our mouth. We don’t waste food, especially shrimp!

We finally took the DVD’s that Cameron received for his birthday to the hospital with a portable DVD player that we brought. There were over 65 DVD’s that people donated. I’m sure that will make one of those long visits a little more comfortable. (There are a lot of transfusions and chemo treatments that make kids spend hours there.)

Our last day of school is tomorrow and both kids are pretty happy. Cameron said he will miss his friends, but doesn’t like school except for gym. (Sorry Mrs. Clark he likes you!)

Toni made me update some pictures!

Please don’t forget to pray for Ryan and Leah, their families and all the children with this horrible tumor.

Monday, June 20, 2005 4:30 PM CDT

Not great news with our MRI. There was some change, but still waiting for some details. So glad that Aunt Toni was here and our friends, CC and Shernell. It made all the difference. Charles was really great too!

Cameron looks good and feels good and is happy - so that's really our overall focus. Definitely not the news that we wanted, but we will keep looking for our cure!

Please keep Ryan (www.caringbridge.org/ky/ryanbrown) in your prayers and another little girl Leah. www.leahsjourney.com They need them right now.

Thanks for checking in and please sign the book and visit our friends!

Saturday, June 18, 2005 11:30 AM CDT

Again time is flying by. Cameron is doing very well. Our MRI is Monday at 9:30. He looks very good, so I'm not expecting bad news, but unfortunately I just can't relax. Charli and I are going to see, "Traveling Pants" so I can sneak some worry tears in with my sad movie tears!

We are expecting Aunt Toni sometime today (since school is out) and Cameron is anxiously awaiting his knuckle sandwich. Good friends of Charles and mine, from college, are coming to spend some time with us, too. We love having company.

Lastly, please, please say a prayer for Ryan and his family. www.caringbridge.org/ky/ryanbrown Visit their site and leave a message. Please pray for Ryan by name.

We need a cure!! Thanks for stopping by. I'll update Monday with MRI results.

Monday, June 13, 2005 4:44 PM CDT

I can't believe I didn't update last week. It was pretty uneventful. Charli got braces on Wednesday. She looks so adorable. Cameron is busy just being happy. He still spends most of his time outside in our little heat wave here in Connecticut. It's crazy hot!

We had a fun weekend. Cameron had a friend come over on Friday and we played with the neighbors. Quinn and Alyssa joined us for dinner and bowling. We laughed a lot. It was so funny because even when Cameron had friends, he still sat on Charles' lap and played with his daddy. Saturday we went to the pool and Cameron's friend Ben's birthday party. It was a fun day. Sunday, Make-A-Wish threw a party for all the wish recipients and their families. It was on a beach and a lot of fun.

Please send extra prayers for my buddy Ryan, he has the same tumor as Cameron and has shown progression and is not doing too well. (caringbridge.com/ky/ryanbrown) He is such a trooper and his parents are great. I actually emailed his mom quite a bit, as she helped me get through the beginning of our journey. Ryan is a cutie!

There is a lot going on with friends and family and I have to not be selfish with my prayers because I know that God can handle all that I send his way. I hope that our friends know that their issues mean so much to us, regardless of what we are going through, and please feel free to call if you need ANYTHING!!

Thanks for checking in. Please drop us a note.

Monday, June 6, 2005 11:21 AM CDT

The weekend is over. Last week was a great week. Cameron comes home from school and never really makes it in the house until dinner. He just wants to play with the neighbors. We are so lucky to be in this neighborhood.

Cameron's school had their Fun Fair on Wednesday. Not only was it a lot of fun. His class raised over $700 for pediatric brain cancer. They sold Kool-Aid and "Say It-Fight It-Cure It" gel bracelets. His classmates (and their parents) were wonderful. They worked so diligently at the booth. I was so proud. Over $700!!!! I hope that regardless of the outcome of our illness, his classmates continue to have a desire to do good for others. It's very easy to become self-absorbed as life gets more difficult.

Charli had a Bat Mitzvah all day Saturday, she was so excited and had so much fun. She's doing really well even though there is Middle School Drama every day that she comes home with. 7th grade girls are....(I can't think of a word), but anyone that has one knows what I mean.

Saturday, we pulled out the sprinklers and slip and slide and all the neighbors came over. It was so fun. Sunday we went to a fair in the town and of course, played outside. Cameron actually got back on his bike. I knew he could do it. He just needed Charles; he didn’t want his daddy to be disappointed. (I’ve been trying for weeks!)

Sorry for not updating, I always start, and then get busy.

Please keep us in your prayers! I’m confused whether there is a miracle that will be happening or this is our miracle. (The fact that Cameron is doing so well and so happy and we are having such a great time is a miracle.) However, we are still waiting for our cure! I know that it’s out there. Our next MRI is June 20th. I am praying for more shrinkage.

Thanks for checking in. Sign the guestbook.

Tuesday, May 31, 2005 12:26 AM CDT

What a beautiful weekend in Connecticut. Cameron had a good chemo week, a little more tired than normal, but still busy. Cameron is doing so well; it’s hard to believe that an ugly tumor is in such a beautiful body. We have really just been enjoying the weather and hanging outside. We have a lot of children in our neighborhood and they all play very well together. The families are great too, so we get to sit outside and chat while the kids play and often all convene for dinner.

Not much else happened, we went to the pool. Charli was in the Memorial Day Parade with her school band. Cameron and I sat on the curb and watched and waved. It was a lot of fun. He was making a list of all the people he saw that he knew (I think it was 7). We came home and had a big neighborhood game of kickball. (Girls against boys) It was so fun. I’ve been really bad about my camera, but I’ll get back on that.

Thanks for checking in! Please sign the guestbook. My mom is home and getting used to taking the insulin shots and changing her diet. Thanks for all the prayers for her!

Please keep us in your prayers! We need a cure.

The Fun Fair at Cameron’s school is tomorrow. The kids are so excited to have their booth to raise money for cancer. They are such selfless children!

Wednesday, May 25, 2005 6:14 AM CDT

The week is going pretty well. Our counts were great so we started chemo on Monday. Cameron is taking it like a champ.

Yesterday, I told him to wiggle his tooth because it was a little loose (Cameron is 8 and has not lost a tooth yet!) He reached in and pulled it right out. He screamed, blood was all over, but there was a little tooth in his hand. He must have pulled pretty hard thinking it wasn't going to move. Charli and I were screaming - we couldn't believe he just yanked it out. It was a sight, all of us yelling in the bathroom, rinsing it with salt water. In the middle of Cameron crying (I'm sure it did hurt a little because that tooth was not that loose) he makes sure that I don't lose it so he can get his money!

Well, the tooth fairy came last night, I know that because Cameron came in at 5:30 this morning asking if I know where his ATM card was for his bank! We are off to PT, then school, then dinner with Mrs. Clark.

He looks very cute (like most kids do in Kindergarten when they lose their first tooth!)

Also, if you live in the area, Cameron's school is having a fun fair on June 1st - the Second Grade Class will be selling - "Cool-Aid 4 Cancer" the money will go to the Children's Brain Tumor Foundation. They will also have the brain cancer gel bracelets. Anyone can come, send me an email if you are interested. It sounds like a lot of fun.

My mom is in the hospital in DC, so please say a prayer for her. She's a wonderful woman - anyone that meets her loves her! I hate being so far away. My dad said it wasn't serious, but I know that's what he would say so I don't fly down there.

Thanks for the prayers! These are really good times. God is good!

Sunday, May 22, 2005 5:50 PM CDT

Another weekend passed by so quickly. It was rather uneventful. Cameron had 2 parties to go to both pool parties and he had a GREAT time. He's really getting used to the water. He also has the greatest kids in his class. The kids and their parents are just incredible. We are so lucky this year.

Charli and I had a wonderful time at the concert. It was really fun. I was so out of my element - it felt really good to be on her side. All those teenagers! It really made me miss teaching. I think everyone should take a day off of work and spend it doing something they wouldn't normally do with someone special. I can't believe how much fun we had.

Charles and Cameron had fun at work also!

Charles is in California this week golfing. Hopefully we will start our next round of chemo tomorrow. We see Dr. Hagstrom in the morning. I'm sure his counts are fine. He's really doing well.

Please say a special prayer for a good friend of mine Eleni that was just diagnosed with MS. She just graduated from college last week. I have no doubts that she will do fine - she's one of the strongest, most mature twenty something's I know. I'm so proud of her. Please add Kaidre, Ryan Brown and Taylor - the other children with this nasty tumor that need help. Where is our cure ????? It's time!

Thanks for checking in!

Sunday, May 22, 2005 5:50 PM CDT

Another weekend passed by so quickly. It was rather uneventful. Cameron had 2 parties to go to both pool parties and he had a GREAT time. He's really getting used to the water. He also has the greatest kids in his class. The kids and their parents are just incredible. We are so lucky this year.

Charli and I had a wonderful time at the concert. It was really fun. I was so out of my element - it felt really good to be on her side. All those teenagers! It reallt made me miss teaching. I think everyone should take a day off of work and spend it doing something they wouldn't normally do with someone special. I can't believe how much fun we had.

Charles and Cameron had fun at work also!

Charles is in California this week golfing. Hopefully we will start our next round of chemo tomorrow. We see Dr. Hagstrom in the morning. I'm sure his counts are fine. He's really doing well.

Please say a special prayer for a good friend of mine Eleni that was just diagnosed with MS. She just graduated from college last week. I have no doubts that she will do fine - she's one of the strongest, most mature twenty something's I know. I'm so proud of her. Please add Kaidre, Ryan Brown and Taylor - the other children with this nasty tumor that need help. Where is our cure ????? It's time!

Thanks for checking in!

Thursday, May 19, 2005 10:58 AM CDT

Just a mid-week update. All is so good in the Brooks household. Cameron took the bus home yesterday and just like we suspected – there were no problems. He actually stayed over the neighbors’ house until 7:00 when I made him come home.

I asked him how he was doing this morning on a scale of 1 to 10 and he said 9,999,999 – so that’s pretty good. He did, however, offer to stay home from school to take care of me (I just have allergies). Anything to stay home and play playstation!

Charli and I are going to see Simple Plan and Good Charlotte tonight. I’m picking her and her friend up early from school. (Boy have I changed – I never would have done that before.) I can’t wait to spend time with her! I really love hanging with my kids- they both are really fun (when they are doing what THEY want to be doing.)

I have to go listen to the songs that these groups sing because I only know one Simple Plan song and one Good Charlotte song! I’m dropping Cameron off at work with Charles – he’s pretty ‘siked’ about that.

Well, thanks for all the prayers!! The power works!!

Monday, May 16, 2005 10:33 AM CDT

Not much to update, the weekend was busy but just with hanging outside and playing inside. Cameron spent about 10 hours all weekend hanging with the neighbors outside. We are very lucky to have a great neighborhood; with a lot of kids. We went to Church on Sunday. Charles was in a golf tournament this whole weekend (he won it!!) so Cameron just stayed attached to his hip as soon as he came home.

Cameron is doing great. I just wish we could freeze this time and not go forward.

I went to a prayer vigil for the little girl Taylor that has the same tumor that Cameron has. They are about to seek an alternative therapy. I am so excited for them! We actually had thought about it before, but decided to go with what we are doing. It is still on our minds. Please send up a prayer for their family; that it all works out. Taylor is an adorable little girl. Hope is what keeps us going!

Charli is doing great – her social life keeps her (and us) pretty busy. She was out every night this week almost! 13 – What an age! She and Cameron were snuggling at church Sunday – it was really cute (they were both a little bored.)

Thanks for all the prayers and notes!

Thursday, May 12, 2005 9:23 AM CDT

Sorry for the delayed update!!!

What a weekend? The party was so much fun. We had family, neighbors, classmates, friends from NJ and a lot of new friends join us to celebrate this special birthday. It was such a perfect day. There were a few glitches in the day, but the over all ambience was celebration! I wish we could do that every month! Each person that walked through the door brought with them a special memory and a genuine feeling that they were happy to be here. We celebrated! A special time for such a special little boy. He was so happy. The kids danced, made crafts and really just played. Just what children should be doing. Charli and her friends came and helped out. I don’t know what I would have done with out them! They were so helpful. Actually there were so many people that helped, I don’t know who to thank first. Everyone really just jumped in to help; even Cameron’s teacher’s husband was helping. There were over 100 people and the weather forced us into the house. It was supposed to be a yard party. It seemed like everyone knew each other.

Our friends from NJ hung around and ate and laughed – it seems like that’s all we used to do! Eat and laugh! It was just like old times.

Mother’s Day was very nice, family (and some non-related family) was still here (I think there were 17 people that slept here!!!!) and it was so good to have them around. I got a chance to watch a movie with my mom and my grandmother. That’s a blessing in itself.

Tuesday was a Dr.s appointment. The nurse’s at the hospital are so wonderful. We always have such a good time. Dr. Hagstrom is on vacation so we saw another oncologist. He was nice, but I’m not sure he was used to having such a silly patient. Our counts are in and he’s doing great!!

I must admit it was a pretty emotional weekend – struggling not to go any further than the each day. Next year is next year – not now. (Charles is definately my rock about not worrying.) My only words are to enjoy each day. Don’t put things off! Don’t put people off!

The weather has been so awesome this week. It’s been so good to be outside. I keep thinking about all the people at the party and then being outside with our neighbors and the kids all playing. We are so blessed.

Please keep praying for us and all the other children!!

*******************************************************

By the way – he requested that I put this picture on the web. He really thinks he really looks cool. (He's so stinkin' cute - I can't stand it!)

He also said that his party was the ‘bomb’! (I thought our house looked like a bomb afterwards, but I don’t think it’s the same thing!)

Friday, May 6, 2005 9:08 AM CDT

Just a quick update. Cameron's birthday was fun. He took little brownie hamburgers into school, thanks to my neighbor Laury. The kids loved them. He played outside for hours after school, we had dinner at Chili's and then he opened gifts. He got an Eye Toy for Play station. It's what he really wanted. It's a camera that let's your body act as the controller. Modern Technology!! It's really neat. It keeps kids from sitting down and playing. It's a lot of work!

Well, our party will be interesting. We are having rain all day so inside we go. I will post pictures.

Grandma Lois, Grandpa Dan and My Great Grandmother (mom-mom) are already here, by the end of the day there will be 16 aunt, uncles, grandparents and cousins here! We can't wait.

Tuesday, May 3, 2005 12:10 AM CDT

Not much is going on here in Connecticut. We are all doing well. We’ve all recovered from vacation and easily transitioned back into everyday stuff. The weekend was pretty rainy. Some of the neighbors came over to play with Cameron, which is good because he sure wasn’t going out anywhere. I think he stayed in his pajamas from Friday night until Sunday night. He’s doing wonderful! He’s been so happy because a good friend of mine, Eleni, sent us a BIG package of Taylor Ham (Pork Roll – it’s a New Jersey thing.) He eats it every morning and now he’s been eating spaghetti o’s everyday for lunch and dinner. I throw in cereal, eggs and some vegetables with dinner sometimes, but he’s eating.

We are now in the processes of getting ready for the party. It is going to be so much fun. Cameron’s Aunt Alexis is coming from Florida!!! She hasn’t been here yet. His cousins are coming and friends from New Jersey. I wish we could do this every month!

I just need to add a request for some special prayers. My really good friend Therese has experienced some set backs with her cancer treatment. She is a wonderful person with an awesome family. Please pray for her healing and strength for them. I love them very much and wish that I were there. Our friend Sarah Weinfield had a difficult weekend ending in surgery on Sunday, she’s only 14, but a very strong little girl. Please continue to pray for Kaidre and Taylor who have the same tumor that Cameron has.

Cameron’s birthday is Thursday; he will be the big 8.

Thank you for all your prayers, they are definitely working.

Wednesday, April 27, 2005 11:53 AM CDT

We’re back!

The trip was amazing! Check out the pictures!! We got to California and went to pick Charles up where he was staying on the beach in Oceanside, playing golf. It was literally on the beach. We met all his golfing friends. The kids ran straight into the water! Clothes and all! It was so fun. (It was chilly so they just got their pants wet!) The guys were a lot of fun and the beach was absolutely beautiful.

We stayed at the Carlsbad Seapointe Resort, thanks to our good friend Peggy! She called and the actual let us stay there for free!!!! It was great. We had a kitchen and fridge. (Which was great because Cameron eats a lot of yogurt, pizza lunchables and not much else!) They had crafts and games. The pool was great and a spray pool. The kids made tie-dye shirts one day. There was something going on each day. We could walk to the beach and everything was so close.

Thursday we headed to Burbank which is about 100 miles north to Nickelodeon Studios. Our friend, Elizabeth arranged a special private tour. Their offices are just fun to be around. We had lunch in their courtyard before our tour. Both Charli and Cameron want to work there when they grow up (we were just glad that Charli’s thinking about a job outside the mall). Allison was our tour guide. She was awesome, we felt like we knew her. We got to sit in on a recording of Avatar, one of the new Nickelodeon cartoons. We watched the cartoon as the actor recorded the voice and the director directed. It was amazing, there is so much work put into perfection. We will all definitely watch cartoons in a new light. I can’t even begin to tell you all the really cool people that we met all of them with a special piece to our favorite cartoons; background, props, effects. All of them loving their jobs and being great at them. They each took special time to explain to Charli and Cameron their piece to making the cartoon. We came home with some great drawings. I just hope we can find a neat way to display them. We also got Gameboy games, video now, hats, yo-yo’s and drawing sets!!!!

We actually spent some time with the creator of Fairly Odd Parents – Butch Hartman. He signed some things and gave us so much cool stuff! It was really neat.

After that Elizabeth had a friend at Disney Animation studio so we headed there. Nicole is an Assistant Production Manager on the Chicken Little Movie. We met the lead Effects Animator and he showed us how the animation is done. He even let Cameron animate Chicken Little!!! We saw one of the scenes from the movie. Then we went to the special effects area and saw another scene from the movie. It looks so good! We can’t wait until November. And guess what??? They had gift for us too - Chicken Little shirts and hats, gameboy games, Disney movies and an Incredibles game. (We LOVED the Incredibles!)

After that we went to see the Hollywood sign and stars on the sidewalk and did a little shopping. Cameron was really tired so we headed back to Carlsbad.

Friday – we headed to Legoland. It was a little chilly, but we had a great time. It is really neat. The things they did with Legos were amazing. It is such a bright cheery place. The kids got to drive Lego cars and got their official California Licenses. We got on a few rides, but mostly marveled at the creations! We saw a really neat 4-D movie (3-D with actual smoke, wind, snow and cold air!) It was a Lego Racers show. Cameron thought it was awesome and can’t wait to go back to see it again. We got home early and Charli and I went shopping and found a mall!! It was fun.

Saturday we hung out at the pool and they had crafts at the place we stayed. We took a drive along the coast and looked for surfers and parasailors. It really was breathtaking.

Sunday,before we headed home, we went to visit Coronado and walked along the beach. We stopped at a park in San Diego and watched a sail boat race. It was really interesting. Then we headed back east. We didn’t actually get home until 3:00 am, but I made the kids go to school anyway. We needed food.

Cameron had a Dr.’s appointment on Monday, his counts were great and we started chemo! He’s doing great.

Well, I think that was enough to read. I updated some pictures. I took over 100 and some movies! It was a really good family vacation.

There is no way to thank all the people that made it so special enough. It was like being in a book or movie or something. Great memories!!!

Thanks for all the prayers!

Next big event!!! – Cameron’s Birthday Party! He will be 8 on May 5th!! It’s been a tough 6 months so we have a lot of celebrating to do.

Okay - for those of you working – get back to work!!!

Tuesday, April 19, 2005 9:48 PM CDT

Sorry I haven't written. I just liked reading that update - over and over!

We are actually en route to California. We drove to New Jersey today and fly out to Sandiego tomorrow. We are going to Legoland! My friend Peg, called the hotel that we wanted to stay at (they were booked) and they are letting us stay at their resort! On them!!! We are going to have so much fun. Peg - you are a true blessing!

We are taking a trip to Burbank to get a backstage Nickelodeon Tour - thanks to Elizabeth. People are so good to us.

We got to visit a few friends today - I hope all that we missed forgive us. Charli got to go back to her old school - she was so happy. They are great kids - they were so happy to see Cameron. The kids have pictures of him on their lockers and websites. We saw Rebecca, Joanna and Kareema (they always write messages to him on the message board.) We got to Cameron's school and saw his 1st grade teacher and the wonderful staff there. We miss them so much.

Well, we are staying with the Varela's tonight and off to the airport bright and early. I will update when we return.

Keep us in your prayers! If you get a chance read the entry in the guestbook about the little girl that prays for Cameron. It gave me chills! I wish I could give her a hug.

Wednesday, April 13, 2005 1:33 PM CDT

Note form Dr. Hagstrom:

"Considerable improvement since last scan. Decreased mass effect and enhancement. YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This is great news."

God is Good!!!! Thanks for all the prayers. We are so happy.

Monday, April 11, 2005 10:51 PM CDT

Not much to update. The weekend was wonderful. The weather was great. All the kids in the neighborhood were out. We spent a lot of time outdoors, created a bunch of great memories. Cameron rode his scooter a lot, hit golf balls with Charles and helped wash his car.

Tomorrow is our MRI. I feel like I won't be able to breathe until Wednesday. (Our appointment is not until 4:00) I am trying so hard not to worry; I know I can't change anything.

I don't like to pray for a miracle because I really feel we have so many miracles each day in so many ways. I have to remember to be specific. Please say a prayer for us that we are able to accept whatever news we get (that’s me tying to be humble but add in that it shrinks some more, better yet –it’s gone!) Even if you don’t normally pray – please – it really helps.

I'll update Wednesday with the good news.

You really don't know the power of writing in this journal, but I was really feeling down and now I feel like I just got a bunch of support from all the friends and family that will read this. It is really therapeutic!

***I added a new picture from the weekend***

Wednesday, April 6, 2005 9:55 PM CDT

So sorry for no update! All is going well. I started the weekend update, and just never posted it. The weekend was fun. We had a lot of rain and stayed indoors except for Cameron had a Birthday Party and Charli had a basketball party (plus Charli had a few mall trips with friends).

Cameron’s friend Jake had a hip hop dance party. It was really cute and Cameron and all the kids danced their little hinnies off. They learned a dance routine and played freeze dance. He had so much fun. He got a CD that we’ve been hearing non stop. He loves MC Hammer – Can’t touch this! He’s really been into music lately. He thinks he’s pretty cool. He needs to spend some of his chemo money and buy a CD player. He’s loaded and doesn’t want to spend any money.

Friday night Charles and I went to dinner with some friends, a neighbor kept Cameron (Charli was supposed to go to a movie, but those plans didn’t work out.). She’s so wonderful; she walked over and picked Cameron up at 9:00, carried him home on her back and put him to bed. Sometimes she just amazes us. We are so lucky to have great kids.

Cameron had a field trip to a museum on Tuesday. They’ve been studying Japan. It was very neat. The kids made origami and tried on kimonos. They learned about calligraphy. Cameron’s summary to Charles was we made origami samurai hats and ate lunch outside on the ground. Well, I went and they did a lot more than that!

Well, today was a Dr. Hagstrom day. Blood counts are great. Cameron wore his “I love my Oncology nurses” shirt. He loves all the attention from those nurses. We bought him a “Kickin Cancers Butt “ shirt from Kody’s web site. (www.caringbridge.org/fl/kodysstory). It’s great to know that Cameron doesn’t have any shame. He knows this is not his fault. We want him to be so proud that he’s fighting. Sometimes I don’t give him enough credit thinking that he’s just so young, that he doesn’t know any better. But it’s not true – he knows. He’s just brave and trusts us. He was so happy today. We can’t explain it, but Cameron has laughed and smiled more in the last six months than ever. The service at Church on Sunday was about living life like a child. They are trusting and understanding. Cameron never holds a grudge; he does what we ask him to do, even when he’s scared. He laughs a lot and really just enjoys little things. (He was cracking up at the lady with the dummy at the hospital – she moves her mouth – aren’t ventriloquist supposed to not move their mouths? He whispered to me that that doll is freakin’ me out! It was kinda freakin’ me out too.)

Okay – I want to end with all the people that are in need of prayers. There are a few. I will concentrate on two adorable little girls - Taylor and Kaidre! Please pray for them by name. He knows! Pray for their families. Send a few up for us also! Our MRI is next week.

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 9:48 PM CST

This week is flying by. All is well in our house. Monday was a blur – I picked Cameron up early for PT and he was in the nurse’s office sleep. I cancelled PT and let him come home to rest. Of course there was some new found energy once he got here.
Tuesday we tried a type of Occupational Therapy that uses electrical currents to stimulate his muscles. It was supposed to help him ‘retrain’ his hand that he doesn’t seem to want to use. He thought it was pretty funny that his hand was moving involuntarily. He’s such a trooper. I hope it helps. After that he just wanted to go home and put his pajamas on – he said he wanted to just be comfortable. So we played hooky and watched Shark Tales. Very cute movie, but he had tears at the end. He is very sensitive. He’s going to make such a great husband one day – except for his issues with hogging the remote. He’s pretty obsessed.
Today, Cameron had a play date with one of his classmates, Quinn. He was so excited. Quinn helps Cameron so much at school. Actually all the children in his class are so good to him, we are so lucky. I wish I could give them all an award for showing compassion. He couldn’t wait to go over to her house. He loves having play dates. I’m not sure what they did over there, but after I picked him up Cameron wanted to go out for dinner and it was after 6:00. He always just wants dinner at home and lay on the couch with daddy. He was so happy. He was dancing and acting crazy all night until he passed out at 8:30. Both kids were so chatty at dinner – it was great.

By the way – Tuesday ended another cycle of chemo! 23 days off before the next round.

Please keep us in your prayers! We need a cure.

Monday, March 28, 2005 6:16 PM CST

Easter was great. It was a really good weekend. Aunt Toni came to visit. Charli had friends sleep over (6 giggling girls) and Charles and I went to the casino for my birthday. (We were not very successful, but had a lot of fun.)

Sunday, we all went to church afterwards it was a little warm so all the kids in the neighborhood were outside. It was so nice to get a taste of spring before all of the nasty rain today. (Even though Cameron constantly reminds me that we need rain to see a rainbow.)

We are on day 4 of 5 for chemo and Cameron's still being a trooper! He's a little more tired than normal, but still dancing and being a nut most of the day. His eating habits are stranger than ever – he loves this special breakfast meat, Taylor Ham, which we can only seem to buy in New Jersey. I really stock up on it every time I go. He wants it every morning. Usually with an egg cooked to order. It’s different every morning and he tells me what he wants for the next two mornings. He remembers to quiz me as soon he gets up – Do you remember what kind of egg I said I wanted today?

Thanks for checking in. Please leave us a note.

By the way Dr. Hagstrom, our oncologist is going to a COG (Children’s Oncology Group) conference. Please pray that he comes back with something new! Something with Cameron and all these children in mind! Our church service was about believing in miracles – I’m sure it was meant for us. Each day is a miracle. We are into six months and he’s doing great.

Keep up the prayers!!

Wednesday, March 23, 2005 11:38 AM CST

Friday Update!!

Counts are back - through the roof. We started back on chemo!

The weekend is off to a great start. I will update on Monday!

Carla

Wednesdays Update

Cameron’s counts are up enough to go to school, but not enough to start chemo. We will test again on Friday. Dr. Hagstrom said he has great bone marrow. I was very proud! I think that’s a compliment coming from an Oncologist. All of his counts are up except the ANC – he thinks it’s the preventative anti-biotic that he takes so we stopped taking it. He will write to the clinical trial and see if we are still in. We will use the same treatment regardless. It’s just that Clinical Trials are so important to finding a cure. They need to show that it’s working. Right now Cameron is in school and so happy to be there!

It’s been boring in the house. Cameron’s been watching a bunch of Sponge Bob. Yesterday we went to Toys R Us after the blood work. We were there for a loooong time. We got two new board games and some sidewalk chalk. (It was almost 50 degrees here yesterday – but snow is coming tonight). My cousin, D’Arcy is home from a year in Iraq. (He was the first one to sign the guest book.) He played Life with Cameron and they did the dance mat. Cam was so happy! We were all so sad when D’Arcy had to leave. He’s trying to shove so many visits in before he’s off to Hawaii where he will be stationed for a year. I added some pictures of yesterdays visit. We are so glad that he’s home and safe.

Keep up the prayers!

Sunday, March 20, 2005 9:23 PM CST

What a great weekend. We went to see Robot on Saturday (at 9:00 AM). It was sponsored by the hospital so there weren’t supposed to be any sick kids there. For those of you that don’t know us, Charles and I have been ‘tag team’ parents. Either he takes the kids while I run an errand or visa versa. We also split the kids – he takes one I take the other. Just to make it easier. Well, Saturday we all went to the movie. Robot was great – there were so many adult jokes – we just kept looking at each other and laughing. We both kept peeking at the kids and watching them laugh, too. I think there were a few scenes that Cameron couldn’t breathe he was laughing so hard. It was really nice. We were all happy and it was great. We had popcorn and soda for breakfast!

Charli, Cameron and I went to visit Camp Hole in the Wall Gang. (I know we were supposed to stay home, but we were outside – not really around anyone). This is a camp for children that can’t really go to a regular camp because of a medical condition. (I still haven’t really come to terms with the fact that, he really can’t go on like normal sometimes) However, this is a special camp with Drs and nurses and a ‘2 campers to 1 counselor’ ratio. It is Paul Newman’s Camp. Cameron and Charli were so excited. It sounds like so much fun. He will have to stay over night, but he’s fine with that. They keep them busy and if he gets tired, he can go rest or if he doesn’t feel like walking, they will take him around in a golf cart. I just wish that I could be there. The last week of the summer they have a sibling’s week that Charli can go to. She can’t wait. I think that will be so special for her. It must be so hard being the sibling of a sick child. No matter what we try to make her feel special – I’m sure she can feel that Cameron is our focus. I can’t imagine what’s going through her little teenage mind. It will be really good for her to be around other siblings.

It was so strange at the camp – parents that talked about their children had Leukemia and how they went to camp 3 years and parents whose children have disorders where they have to have their blood monitored every hour, there was someone there whose daughter was and amputee from cancer and I was jealous. I guess I have to remember that there wasn’t always a cure for Leukemia and one day – hopefully very soon – there will be a cure for this tumor also. I know it’s scary for all parents with sick children – just a little envious of a better prognosis.

I didn’t even get into Sunday (Charli & Chalres went snowboarding/skiing and Cameron and I sat here on the computer at nick.com and Disney.com playing games. Actually, I just watched – he’s so cute. He reads the directions so carefully before he plays. (I know - a man that reads directions!) He really had fun.

Oh!! I forgot another highlight of the weekend – Saturday morning Cameron got a package from Uncle Marc – I think it was seven Sponge Bob CD’s; Season 1, Season 2, the Christmas Special, the Halloween Special and some others. He didn’t know where to start! Every time we’ve tried to watch them this weekend – he gets so busy talking about them and which one he’s going to watch in what order – we don’t get to see too much. It was perfect! Thanks Uncle Marc – now he is Sponge Bob’s biggest fan.

This was going to be a quick entry so I could get some work done, but the weekend was busier and better than I thought! God is good! He’s enjoying us being a family – I know God is proud.

Thanks for all the prayers!

Thursday, March 17, 2005 8:12 PM CST

ANC (the white count) went down. Not sure what’s going on, but we are now below the ‘social’ level so we have to avoid hanging out and partying. That means no school. We will be homebound until after our next count on Tuesday. He’s a little sad because he had a play date after school tomorrow with one of his friends. (Actually we are going to the movies on Saturday, but only because it’s a hospital trip and no sick people are allowed.) We can’t stay in this house too long without going stir crazy.

It’s strange because Cameron is not sick at all. I guess he’s fighting off something some where in his body. It’s not stopping him from doing the winning dance when he beat me in War. I must admit – I cheat to lose because that game can go on for hours!!!! It will be a board game, Play Station and movie weekend.

Keep us in your prayers!

Wednesday, March 16, 2005 4:11 PM CST

Good News – our platelet count went up. Bad news – our ANC (which is part of the white blood cell counts) went down too low. So, chemo is delayed again. Kinda stinky!
I guess more good news is that is was an easy stick and only one!

We are going to go back tomorrow for another count to see if it’s gone up. This week is conference week at school so they have half days – so we will probably stay home. It’s been a while since we missed two days in one week. Actually tomorrow is St. Patrick’s day – maybe we can stop by with some cupcakes then head home. (I’ll have to check with Mrs. Clark)

Today it was into the 40’s! Cameron rode his scooter, Charli played basketball and we attempted to play 3square (the version of 4 square with only three people). Charli and I tried to play with one hand behind our backs to make it fair. It was really hard! We could only take about 20 minutes of 40 degree weather so now we are back inside with frozen hands.

Keep praying for us and all the other children and their families.

Thanks for checking in! Make sure you do something with your kids tonight, kiss them and tell them how wonderful they are (even when they do bad things!).

Friday, March 11, 2005 6:35 PM CST

TGIF – We are going to Friday’s for an early dinner. It’s so funny how Cameron always wants something so bad to eat. Orders a ton of food – then is full after two bites. But from the words of my daughter – Whatever! We will go to Fridays and maybe he will eat. We are looking forward to another busy weekend. Our friend and neighbor’s party is Saturday at this climbing place (not the best idea for someone with a low platelet count) and Cameron can’t wait! I will be sitting there on pins & needles while he acts like a wild man. Charli has hopefully two games on Saturday – if they make it to the finals.
Just some advertisement – Charli’s team decided to do ‘coaching for the cure’. Teams donate the money they normally collect for the coach and donate it to www.curesearch.org the coach gets a shirt and certificate and the nicest letter of thanks. The letter gave me chills. I hope it’s as moving to the coaches. If you have a child or know of one on a team it’s a great idea –www.coachingforthecure.org is their website.

Well, Charles is golfing in Myrtle Beach so I’m on a cooking hiatus and we are enjoying looking forward to eating out all weekend.

My goal is to have new pictures loaded. I wish I knew how to load movies, because I have some good ones and one of my neighbors made the most awesome DVD from our ski trip. It is so good. Billy & Lily thanks so much! (They just had a new baby and are still doing things for us!)

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Sunday Update!!

I just had to do a quick weekend update! Saturday was a lot of fun. Cameron had a ball at the party and went home with them and stayed until 7. 10-7 that’s a long day!

Charli’s team won the playoffs! They had the championship game today!

****They won!!!****

It was so exciting. The team they played was undefeated and beat them during the season by about 30 points.

These were the stats:
Score at first quarter: 5-8 (5 points for us, 8 points for them)
second quarter: 9-15 (4 points for us, 7 points for them)
third quarter: 15-23 (6 points for us, 8 points for them)
fourth quarter: 29-27 ( 14 points for us, 4 points for them)
The only stat that really matter is this one:
Final Score: Mystics 29 Starzz 27
MYSTICS: 2005 WEST HARTFORD SENIOR GIRLS BASKETBALL LEAGUE CHAMPIONS!!
It was awesome – Cameron was sitting with his gym teacher (she was there to see her daughter) and after the game I went to get him and he was crying he was so happy. (I always said – I’m going to raise my son to be sensitive). I think Charles would have been crying if he was there. Those girls played hard and the coaches were great. They were happy to be there – winning was gravy!

Charli is babysitting and Cameron and I went out to dinner (we’ve eaten out everyday that Charles was gone). I’m going to make him go to bed for school tomorrow.

By the way the team collected $200 for Coaching For the Cure!

See the updated pictures!

Tuesday, March 8, 2005 5:23 PM CST

Another snow storm in CT! This is crazy, the kids got out early and will probably be late tomorrow.

All went well with Dr. Hagstrom today. He thinks Cameron looks good. We were supposed to start round 4 of our chemo treatments, but Cameron's platelet count was too low. We are going to give his body a little rest and try again next week. He was happy, but we give him money for taking his chemo and he was looking forward to his paycheck.

I need to read to make sure that this doesn’t affect the clinical trial that we are in.

Keep up the prayers!

Saturday, March 5, 2005 11:02 AM CST

Not much to update. It’s been a good week. We had family game night at Cameron’s school on Thursday and it was a lot of fun. Charli had 6 friends sleep over last night. She had a great time. Anyone with a teenager knows that when they are happy, the house is happy. Cameron was up this morning sitting at her door waiting for the girls to wake up. As soon as they were, he was sitting right in there with them. He loves being with Charli and her friends. We are going to pick up her friend Jen from NJ now – so I know the rest of the weekend will be fun.

On a sad note – this tumor has just made another cute little angel. Melody is very special; I developed a special bond with her father through their updates and e-mail. He was always so comforting. It’s great to talk to someone that is traveling the road you are on and able to give some guidance. You probably don’t know that we go to check the message board each day. It’s like getting mail. The words that people leave make us feel good. Please stop by and leave them a message. I know that there are no words that can comfort Rob, Deb and Devin now, but a note from a stranger just might make them feel better knowing that this awful illness brings people together in one common goal – to help – in someway – anyway. Please pray for God to give them strength and courage to get through these days. Melody

Tomorrow is Charli’s 13th birthday!!! She’s a great little girl!!!

Tuesday, March 1, 2005 8:42 PM CST

What a week. We had so much fun last week on our Winter break. Not sure where to start. Beware: This is a long update!!!!! I just don’t want to leave anyone out.

The first weekend we went to Vermont, I’m pretty sure I updated about that. Cameron had a great time. Cameron is still talking about Luke and the half-pike. He wants to try it next time we go. Thanks Luke and Jake.

Tuesday was our appointment with Dr. Hagstom. Again, he thinks Cameron looks great. Cameron was so full of energy and Dr. Hagstrom always makes him laugh more – it’s hard to believe, but our visits are pretty fun. He didn’t even take blood since he looked so good. We left Tuesday night and stayed with Aunt Toni in Baltimore then off Wednesday morning to Landover, MD to see Grandma & Grandpa. We went to Wednesday night Lent Service with his cousins Daniel, Alex and Alana. It was really good to see our friends at Ascension Lutheran Church.

Thursday we had a great day – we went to Target and the bookstore. I’m not sure why that was so much fun, but it was; Charli, Cameron and I just spent the whole day laughing while we were waiting for Grandma to run errands. I can’t believe how much fun it is to be with the kids with no stress to be anywhere at anytime.

I was sent an article by Grand Carol a while ago about a Dr. that is doing Cancer research at John Hopkins and possibly using it on brain tumors. Like I do with all my leads (thank you to everyone that sends me some hope and all the people spending their time on brain tumor research – it means everything to us to know how many eyes are looking for a cure – if it’s out there – we will find it), I do some research then try to contact someone and see if it can help Cameron’s tumor. I started e-mailing Dr. Ko and she wanted us to come up and visit her lab. I thought it would be a good experience and a chance to see what is going on - on the research side. So Friday, after we visited my Grandmother (Cameron’s great-grandmother) at her residence home and met some of her friends; and then we went to visit one of my old college friends that I haven’t seen in years and Cameron played with her handsome sons. We went to meet Dr. Ko and Dr. Pedersen, it was great. Aunt Toni decided to join us (since Maryland closes schools if there are any signs of snow – regardless what the roads are like). So, me, Toni, Charli and Cameron made our way to John Hopkins. It was fun. Most researchers are so dedicated and seriously are working for a cause – they work days and nights. It’s the political part that is irritating. Getting things to clinical trial and FDA issues. Cameron got to pet the rats that are used in experiments and we all asked questions and actually again had a lot of fun. I got this note from their colleague – it really meant a lot.

“Wow! I am so impressed with you and your family. You're inspiring.

Thank you so much for coming in to meet with us. I can't think of a
better way for Drs. Ko and Pedersen to be reminded of why they're
working as hard as they are - then to meet someone as special as
Cameron.”

Friday night we had a small Birthday Party for Charli at Aunt Toni’s house, Uncle Marc drove up and Toni’s friends’ joined us. Cameron was a wild man. He was dancing until he was sweating. He slept until 9:00 the next morning!!! Cameron is up every morning before 6:00! Usually by 5:30.
Then after breakfast off to New Jersey. We stayed in a suite and told everyone to visit us there. Including Cameron and I and Charli’s guest visit (she stayed with her friend Jenn) there were 30 people! The Alverado’s ordered food (thanks Peg) and we stayed up late laughing and eating and the kids were playing and attacking Sean and Austin (two good friends that are in high school and played with the kids). I saw two good friends from the school where I taught in NJ and old neighbors and all of our cookout friends. It was awesome, except I couldn’t find my camera. Cameron hung in there even though I know the noise was driving him crazy. He was beating on Sean and Austin like all the other kids.

Sunday was church! I can’t explain how wonderful our church in New Jersey is. It was definitely life changing for both Charli and I and; I’m sure if we stayed, for Cameron also. I know that I wouldn’t be as strong if I hadn’t developed my relationship with God that I did there. It was a great sermon, like always, and fellowship that we so dearly miss.

Then the benefit at the Theatre – I was expecting a few more people, but was so, so , so excited to see those that I did, so many of my old co-workers that I hadn’t seen in a while. It was so great. Cameron stayed with friends of the family during the play. They spoiled him so bad he didn’t want to come home! He loves Cindy and her mom and they kissed him and waited on him for two straight hours. I think he’s starting to think that he’s royalty!

After that I went to visit Therese, my friend and neighbor who is recovering from her surgery and also now struggling with Cancer. It hurt so bad to leave her knowing that we weren’t just going next door. Cancer is a beast! Please add her to your prayer list.

OK – I’m sure you want me to get to the Cameron part. Over all, it was a remarkable week. I don’t think there is one person that saw him that didn’t think that he looked great and didn’t see him smiling or laughing. What I wonder is, if Cameron didn’t have cancer would we have gone out of our way to see so many people? Would they have come in the cold and snow to see us? I so wonder why we wait for the fear of losing something before we decide to then hold on to it and appreciate it. Well from September 27, 2004 going forward no time is wasted! If for some reason, this whole story doesn’t end like we hope, with Cameron being cured, there will be no regrets. I know that God is so happy looking down on our family and friends.

By the way, It’s easier to be positive while he’s doing so well – don’t forget to check on some of the other children whose lifes’ journey are coming to end and their parents can only think of how much they will be missed. Please pray for Ray-Anne and Melody, ask God to comfort their families and get them through each day.

Happy Birthday to my good friend Roni – I am comforted knowing that, if the time comes you will be sitting in heaven watching out for Cameron!

If you’re wondering where Charles was – he stayed home to work and pay the bills! Thanks Charles! He’s not a big fan of unplanned and unorganized trips! (Especially ones where we aren’t even sure where we are staying each night.) We missed him and were all glad to be home.

Sorry for the long update! Lots to say – Lots to be thankful for!!! Thank you to everyone that made this a great week! God is Good!

Tuesday, March 1, 2005 8:42 PM CST

What a week. We had so much fun last week on our Winter break. Not sure where to start. Beware: This is a long update!!!!! I just don’t want to leave anyone out.

The first weekend we went to Vermont, I’m pretty sure I updated about that. Cameron had a great time. Cameron is still talking about Luke and the half-pike. He wants to try it next time we go. Thanks Luke and Jake.

Tuesday was our appointment with Dr. Hagstom. Again, he thinks Cameron looks great. Cameron was so full of energy and Dr. Hagstrom always makes him laugh more – it’s hard to believe, but our visits are pretty fun. He didn’t even take blood since he looked so good. We left Tuesday night and stayed with Aunt Toni in Baltimore then off Wednesday morning to Landover, MD to see Grandma & Grandpa. We went to Wednesday night Lenten Service with his cousins Daniel, Alex and Alana. It was really good to see our friends at Ascension Lutheran Church.

Thursday we had a great day – we went to Target and the bookstore. I’m not sure why that was so much fun, but it was; Charli, Cameron and I and we just spent the whole day laughing while we were waiting for Grandma to run errands. I can’t believe how much fun it is to be with the kids with no stress to be anywhere at anytime.

I was send an article by Grand Carol a while ago about a Dr. that is doing Cancer research at John Hopkins and possibly using it on brain tumors. Like I do with all my leads (thank you to everyone that sends me some hope and all the people spending their time on brain tumor research – it means everything to us to know how many eyes are looking for a cure – if it’s out there – we will find it), I do some research then try to contact someone and see if it can help Cameron’s tumor. I started to email with Dr. Ko and she wanted up to come and visit her lab. I thought it would be a good experience and a chance to see what is going on - on the research side. So Friday, after we visited my Grandmother (Cameron’s great-grandmother) at her residence home and met some of her friends and then went to visit one of my old college friends that I haven’t seen in years and Cameron played with her handsome sons. We went to meet Dr. Ko and Dr. Pedersen, it was great. Aunt Toni decided to join us (since Maryland closes schools if there are any signs of snow – regardless what the roads are like). So, me, Toni, Charli and Cameron made our way to John Hopkins. It was fun. Most researchers are so dedicated and seriously are working for a cause – they work days and nights. It’s the political part that is irritating. Getting things to clinical trial and FDA issues. Cameron got to pet the rats that are used in experiments and we all asked questions and actually again had a lot of fun. I got this note from their colleague – it really meant a lot.

“Wow! I am so impressed with you and your family. You're inspiring.

Thank you so much for coming in to meet with us. I can't think of a
better way for Drs. Ko and Pedersen to be reminded of why they're
working as hard as they are - then to meet someone as special as
Cameron.”

Friday night we had a small Birthday Party for Charli at Aunt Toni’s house, Uncle Marc drove up and Toni’s friends’ joined us. Cameron was a wild man. He was dancing until he was sweating. He slept until 9:00 the next morning!!! Cameron is up every morning before 6:00! Usually by 5:30.
Then after breakfast off to New Jersey. We stayed in a suite and told everyone to visit us there. Including Cameron and I and Charli’s guest visit (she stayed with her friend Jenn) there were 30 people! The Alverado’s ordered food (thanks Peg) and we stayed up late laughing and eating and the kids were playing and attacking Sean and Austin (two good friends that are in high school and played with the kids). I saw two good friends from the school where I taught in NJ and old neighbors and all of our cookout friends. It was awesome, except I couldn’t find my camera. Cameron hung in there even though I know the noise was driving him crazy. He was beating on Sean and Austin like all the other kids.

Sunday was church! I can’t explain how wonderful our church in New Jersey is. It was definitely life changing for both Charli and I and; I’m sure if we stayed, for Cameron also. I know that I wouldn’t be as strong if I hadn’t developed my relationship with God that I did there. It was a great sermon, like always, and fellowship that we so dearly miss.

Then the benefit at the Theatre – I was expecting a few more people, but was so, so , so excited to see those that I did, so many of my old co-workers that I hadn’t seen in a while. It was so great. Cameron stayed with friends of the family during the play. They spoiled him so bad he didn’t want to come home! He loves Cindy and her mom and they kissed him and waited on him for two straight hours. I think he’s starting to think that he’s royalty!

After that I went to visit Therese, my friend and neighbor who is recovering from her surgery and also now struggle through Cancer. It hurt so bad to leave her knowing that we weren’t just going next door. Cancer is a beast! Please add her to your prayer list.

OK – I’m sure you want me to get to the Cameron part. Over all, it was a remarkable week. I don’t think there is one person that saw him that didn’t think that he looked great and didn’t see him smiling or laughing. What I wonder is, if Cameron didn’t have cancer would we have gone out of or way to see so many people? Would they have come in the cold and snow to see us? I so wonder why we wait the fear of losing something do we decide to then hold on to it and appreciate it. Well from September 27, 2004 going forward no time is wasted! If for some reason, this whole story doesn’t end like we hope, with Cameron being cured, there will be no regrets. I know the God is so happy looking down on our family and friends.

By the way, It’s easier to be positive while he’s doing so well – don’t forget to check on some of the other children whose lifes’ journey are coming to end and their parents can only think of how much they will be missed. Please pray for Ray-Anne and Melody, ask God to comfort their families and get them through each day.

Happy Birthday to my good friend Roni – I am comforted knowing that, if the time comes you will be sitting in heaven watching out for Cameron!

If you’re wondering where Charles was – he stayed home to work and pay the bills! Thanks Charles! He’s not a big fan of unplanned and unorganized trips! (Especially ones where we aren’t even sure where we are staying each night.) We missed him and were all glad to be home.

Sorry for the long update! Lots to say – Lots to be thankful for!!! Thank you to everyone that made this a great week! God is Good!

Thursday, February 24, 2005 9:53 AM CST

We are in Maryland! Getting spoiled by grandma! We somehow brought the snow with us! Sorry!

Having fun doing nothing and hanging out with family! It's the best.

Updates when we get back to Connecticut.

Monday, February 21, 2005 4:22 PM CST

I am so sorry for not updating. It’s been a pretty busy week. Cameron had a great Valentine’s Day breakfast at school. Charles and I both attended. It was very nice to see all the children and their parents. Both Charli and Cameron had a fun day.

Tuesday Cameron got his ankle brace. I’ll try to put a picture up today. It really helps him walk a little better, but it takes forever to put his shoe on with it and it starts to bother him after a while for now. We are weaning him into it so we’ll see. Cameron thinks that he’s walking almost like normal anyway.

The rest of the week was pretty uneventful. Cameron got a beautiful blanket in the mail from Tumbleweed. He immediately took off his clothes and walked around wrapped in the sponge bob blanket. He loves walking around wrapped in a blanket.

We had a surprise visit from Uncle Eric from New Jersey yesterday. It was great – we use to see him all the time and haven’t seen him since we moved. He played pool with Cameron and had a beer with Charles. It was almost like old times, except his wife and kids weren’t here and they only had one beer rather than 5 (Eric had to drive back to NJ). We really miss our friends in New Jersey.

We went to Vermont over the weekend. It was so much fun. Cameron snowboarded, Charli skied and then they went to the pool. Sunday Cameron spent the whole day with Luke and Jake our friends, he watched Luke do tricks on his snowboard on the half pike (it’s a curved ramp). He thought it was the coolest thing ever. They are really sweet boys. I really can’t believe how good other children are to Cameron, they always want to help him.

Charli ran into a tree skiing, but she’s OK. Charles really hurt his back snowboarding. It’s all bruised; he won’t let me put the picture on the web.

We are off to Maryland tomorrow to visit family. First to Baltimore, then to Landover then back to Baltimore. Friday we are going to visit a lab at John Hopkins where they are doing Cancer research. (I will give more information on that later.)

Saturday we go to New Jersey. The theatre group that Charli was very active in; and was just like a part of our family, is donating the proceeds from their show on Sunday to our Foundation (which we are just starting for Cancer Research). If you are in New Jersey on Sunday at 4:00 please come to the show.

Thanks for checking in. Please keep up the prayers.

Please add a really good friend of our Therese Bradley to your prayer list, she is very sick and just had surgery and will start chemo soon. She was our next door neighbor for seven years and we have been through so much together, I am so sad that I can’t be there.

Sunday, February 13, 2005 9:45 PM CST

It’s Sunday night, the day before Valentine’s Day. We had a busy yet uneventful weekend. Cameron is doing great. He still fights to go to school, but gets there everyday and does fine. He was fighting a little cold last week, but like Cameron, it only bothered him when he didn’t want to do something.

Thursday night we used our Friendly’s gift card (Friendly’s is not Charles’ favorite place, so we went one night that he had a work dinner). We really had fun, Charli and Cameron both kept commenting on how great the macaroni and cheese was there. I was so insulted because it’s not real homemade mac & cheese like I make, it’s that box stuff. They both acted like it was a gourmet meal. Cameron’s appetite comes and goes (it always has, but it is a little worse). I guess we will have to visit Friendly’s more often.

Saturday Charli had a Bat Mitzvah for her friend in the morning, she looked very pretty all dressed up with her friends. In the afternoon we all went to Josie’s 2nd birthday party. It was a lot of fun. Unfortunately, they gave out whistles which for some reason after radiation, Cameron has no tolerance for. He was going crazy. He even yelled, which is not like Cameron. I was so embarrassed because he wanted to get some cake and get out of that house. (Sorry Felicia – it was just the noise)

Cameron spent this morning finishing up his Valentine’s Day cards for his class. Then Charles and Cameron went to the UConn game, we had two extra tickets (Charli had a basketball game so we couldn’t go) so Mrs. Clark and Micheala went. (Cameron’s teacher and her 3 year old daughter – they are both big UConn Basketball fans). They had a great time. Cameron was so happy.

I was talking to a doctor that does tumor research last week and she said something interesting. She said that being happy and getting excited helps the tumor to not grow. I’ve been spending some time thinking about that and how everyone goes out of their way to do such nice things to make Cameron happy. It was such a hopeful thought. Cameron has been so happy and we have changed putting off so many things that we might have before. We kiss our kids more and see family more. I honestly think we laugh more then we did before Cancer. I think we are all a little more patient. I can’t believe all the things that you have to learn the hard way. ( I’ll have to ask Charles for a great cliché about how short life is and enjoying the journey. He’s great at stuff like that, but he’s watching the Emmy’s or Grammy’s; whichever is on. ) I’ll continue this deep thought with the next entry. I must go put out candy and cards for Valentines Day.

Please keep us in your prayers! Have a great Valentine’s Day. Buy some candy for someone.

Wednesday, February 9, 2005 6:45 PM CST

All went well yesterday with the MRI except when they went to take his blood, it took 4 sticks and over 45 minutes!!! Poor Cameron was screaming, they were just poking around in there trying to get some blood. I felt so bad for him, but he held fun conversations in-between the painful jabs. He looked forward to each new Band-Aid and liked to see the little dot of blood come out when they took the needle out. He was extra happy that he got a special gift since it was so bad. Guess what he picked? Skateboard Mega Blocks (just like legos)! He was so happy. He walked right into his MRI laid down on the table then eventually fell asleep.

His blood counts are fine (platelets a little low, but that’s expected from the chemo). Last night was the first night of this cycle of chemo. He said he felt sick afterwards, but seemed to be fine laying in OUR bed watching Tom & Jerry until 10:00 laughing hysterically with his hand clutched onto the remote so I couldn’t change to what I wanted to watch.

Dr. Hagstrom called today to tell us that the MRI showed the tumor looks a little smaller and a little less enhanced – that is great news! Cameron seemed to be getting a little weaker so we were very worried. Again the doctor thinks that Cameron is just adapting to not using his left side and that’s what’s causing the weakness.

We are so thrilled! Please keep up the prayers! Give your children a big hug and kiss! I’m going to go do the same!

Monday, February 7, 2005 8:04 PM CST

The weekend was pretty fun. Cameron had a few great days at school. Friday we had a little snow storm that caused school to open 2 hours late, I got Cameron there when all the other kids were walking in. It was such a glimpse of a prior life; Cameron with all the other kids going to school – the way that it should be. He stayed all day.

Saturday was fun – he was glad to have his Uncle Marc here to play with him. He was also glad that Uncle Marc slept in his room with him – even though he woke poor Marc up in the middle of the night to get in his bed – then at Cameron’s usual 5:30 wake up time to watch cartoons. Aunt Toni stayed on him about all the things he’s supposed to do – exercise, eat right and read. (I think she forgets that she’s not his mother, but that’s OK, I need a break sometimes and she's pretty good at it.) The ladies went shopping during the day and we all went to the casino on Saturday night. There was a great play area to check the kids in, with arcade games and Lego’s and the dancing game, but Cameron said the children weren’t very nice and Charli wanted to be in the group with the 13 year olds since she only has a month; so they left a little early. None of us ended up rich – but it was fun.

Sunday was the Super Bowl and we had a few people over, Charli was babysitting and Cameron was playing football downstairs with Ms. Renee! (I don’t think we should be playing football in the house, but since she’s the only one that liked my crab dip, I’ll make an exception.) It was fun! By the way – Charli’s basketball team lost their first game.

Well, tomorrow is our MRI – it’s not until late so I’m sure we won’t know anything. I’m not expecting any changes. Cameron looks good and feels good. We also start our next round of chemo (those 23 days off go by very quickly). I actually like chemo weeks because I feel like we are doing something besides just sitting around. (Whether it’s working or not!!)

Thanks for checking in, please leave us a message. Keep up the prayers and don’t forget all the other children.

(Thanks Walter T. for calling us to turn on the Boom Boom Huck Jam – it was awesome – Cameron is still talking about it!!! You’re a great cousin and we hope you can visit us.)

Thursday, February 3, 2005 7:25 PM CST

Thursday already! Not too much going on this week. Cameron is doing well. Make-A-Wish came yesterday. Cameron wishes to meet Tony Hawk and attend the Boom Boom Huck Jam. (Tony Hawk sponsors 25 shows across the country with ramps and bikes and skate boards). They came over with gifts, which always makes Cameron happy.

Mrs. Clark and Micheala came over to play Dance Dance Revolution (it’s a mat with arrows and a video game tells you where to put your foot – it’s to music and you really have to pay attention – you get a score based on how many times you hit the arrows when you were supposed to.) It was a lot if fun!

Cameron got a brace for his arm that, we hope, will help him hold his hand open. He also got fitted for an ankle brace that will make walking a little easier. He was very excited about both. He seems to be happy no matter what.

Grand Carol, Uncle Marc and Aunt Toni are coming this weekend. It should be fun.

As always, thank you for checking in and please keep up the prayers!

Tuesday, February 1, 2005 8:39 PM CST

Not a long note. All is well in the Brooks household. Some of you may notice that there are a lot of other ‘caringbridge’ children that sign the guest book, well those families have become a part of ours, as we all try to deal with childhood cancer (and other sicknesses) especially those that have the same tumor as Cameron (dpg – diffuse pontine glioma). It breaks my heart that one beautiful little girl , Emily, earned her wings yesterday. She was diagnosed in December of 2003 and was one of the longest living dpg’s that we follow. I can’t believe how sad it makes me that there are parents that have to wake up without their baby.
There is another little girl, Melody , who has also become very special. Melody and her family are in need of prayers; she is not doing very well. He father Rob, constantly sent me emails with words of encouragement over the last few months. Please stop by their guest books and let them know that you are supporting them.

Sunday, January 30, 2005 1:26 PM CST

It’s Sunday and I can’t believe I haven’t updated. I guess I’ll go back day by day since I’ve been bad about keeping up.

Wednesday
The snow day was a lot of fun. Cameron and I played outside for a while. He kept jumping and doing cannonballs in the snow. Yes, it was that deep. It was a very dusty snow so there was no snowball making. Some of the neighbors came out and the kids played on their junglegym for about an hour. It was about 20 degrees. They were sliding and climbing like it was summer. I sat on the inside with the other moms watching with hot tea. It was very nice.

Thurday
Cameron went to school almost all day today. He had a good day. They had a visit from a firefighter. Mrs. Clark said he was very happy. It was Bingo and Pizza night at his school. It was really a blast, Cameron didn’t want to go, then didn’t want to leave. We sat with Mrs. Clarks’ daughter, Michaela, she is 3 and laughs at everything Cameron did. I think he thought he was a comedian. He was really showing off. He won “recess duty with another teacher” (I’m not sure why a duty is fun) and was very, very happy. It was great to see him so happy to win. He had the proudest look on his face. It was a great night!

The family pictures we took came in and they are wonderful. The photos and this great collage are a gift from our neighbors!!!! They never cease to amaze us. The photographer really caught great moments. It’s wonderful!!! Please if you aren’t a picture taker – become one!!! I just think how I wish we had taken more pictures before all of this! Now I’m becoming obsessed. Cameron’s face has gone down since we stopped the steroids, once his hair comes back we are going for photos again. Don’t get me wrong, we love Cameron no matter what he looks like, but those changes make us think about the cancer because we know what he was like before.

Friday
Cameron was in school all day. I felt guilty, but he was fine. Charli had a school dance. She had a great time. I love to see her so happy!

Yesterday
We woke up and went skiing with some of our neighbors. Bill is a ski instructor and has been trying to get Cameron out ever since he knew he liked to snow board. He was so helpful. We had a great time. It was really fun. We just went for half a day. Charles was so happy, that Charli has become so good. They kept going to the top of the mountain together. She really picked it up fast. Bill’s wife, Lily, took some really great photos. I’ll put them up when I get them. As for now, I changed the front page photo a little.

Today
Charli’s team won her game! It was great. We are going to try to go to movies, but Cameron wants to stay home.

What a week! It’s been great. The people from Make-A-Wish are coming on Wednesday and Cameron changes constantly about what he wants. It will be interesting!

Please continue to keep us in your prayers! We really need a cure! Time is precious!

Wednesday, January 26, 2005 10:22 AM CST

Another snow day in Connecticut! The kids will be in school until August at this rate. Charli left to go over a friends at 9:00!!! Just when you think you're a fun parent they become teenagers. Charles is off to work and Cameron and I are waiting for it to get to at least 15 degrees before we go out to play. (It might not happen)

Yesterday we saw Dr. Hagstrom, Cameron's oncologist, he still thinks Cameron looks great. We are trying to scheduale his next MRI for February 8th. He will get them with every other cycle of chemo as stated in the clinical trial.

Thanks for stopping by. Keep us in your prayers!

Monday, January 24, 2005 7:39 AM CST

The weekend is over. I’ve started the update at least three times and didn’t finish. We were hit with a storm on Saturday, like most of the East Coast, but it really wasn’t that bad. It’s Monday morning and we are off to school. On time!

We bought the Dance Dance Revolution game like Christine and have been having so much fun. It’s a lot of work. Charli and Cameron have been playing together all weekend.

Cameron did a great job reading his poems at school. His classmates were adorable! They read their stories and they were all so good. It was really fun. They had to read their dedications and the story and about the author. It really was sweet.

Not much went on last week with Cameron. Cameron was seeing double again even with the prism in his glasses. He’s actually been seeing double for a while, but never bothered to tell us. I just noticed it one day when he was watching TV at a strange angle. The prism in his glasses tricks his eyes into believing he only sees single. Not exactly sure how, but that’s what they tell me. Now he should be seeing a little better. I’m not really clear how he reads, writes and functions seeing double, but he adapts and doesn’t complain.

Cameron has been in the greatest moods. He’s always happy and very silly. I have some of the funniest videos of him lately.

Not much going on. Please say some extra prayers for our Caringbridge families; having a sick child really puts the whole family through a lot. You are so torn between how you really want to act and say and the way that you should act and the things you should say. It really does drain everyone. It is so hard to watch your children and know the fate of most of the other children and not be miserable! You just can’t live in your own world and deal with it – there is a whole family involved. Everyone is struggling in their own way.

Thanks for checking in! Don’t forget to sign the guestbook.

Wednesday, January 19, 2005 9:35 PM CST

We are back! I don’t know where to start with the weekend. It was fabulous! So much to talk about…

Saturday we had an early dinner with a ton of family – Aunts, Uncles, cousins, grandparents, even his great grandmother. There were 17 of us and Cameron just had fun being with his cousins. All day it was just fun being at grandma’s house with different toys (not that isn't just like Toys R Us around this house). Sunday was great – we all went to church. We took up two pews. Pastor Hedt gave a sermon based on 1 Corinthians 12:26. How if one member suffers, all members suffer and if one is honored, they all rejoice. How apropos? I don’t think there was one person in those pews that would not give everything to make Cameron better. (even the children!!) He was also talking about how that doesn’t just mean your blood relatives and we definitely know that. There are so many people that check on us and pray for us that I would definitely put in the family category. I don’t think he meant our family anyway – he meant His family. I often talk about the caringbridge family – we all feel the pain when our children have bad days, or relapses or anything.

After church, a little boy, Isaiah was nice enough to let Cameron and his cousins come to his birthday party at Jeepers! Only Daniel and Marcus were invited, but Cameron, Alex and Alana all tagged along. They had so much fun. Cameron actually thought this was one of the best parts of his weekend. Thanks Isaiah and Happy Birthday! All he’s been talking about is having his party at Jeepers (even though there isn’t one in Connecticut – not sure how we will pull that off). He’s still excited about the ball toy in the goody bag. We met a little girl there that prays for Cameron every night; it makes me feel so good how many people that are praying for us.

Monday we went to stay with Uncle Marc, Aunt Gerri and his cousin Christine. They had a dancing machine toy there that Cameron and Charli loved. Aunt Toni came to visit and it was a lot of fun. (She stank at the dancing game though) Cameron really didn’t want to come home Tuesday morning. Uncle Marc gave Cameron another snowboard lego set. This one the little men do tricks – he put those 225 pieces together this morning before school. He woke up at 6 AM – ready to start working on them. He said this one was better than the one that Santa bought him, but he can put them both up.

Tomorrow is Author Day at school – all the children in his class wrote books so we get to go hear them read. Cameron has a poem collection. I can’t wait to hear it; the children in his class are great; very creative, kind and thoughtful. It will be fun.

I will put the pictures together and load them tomorrow!

Thank you for all the prayers!

Thursday, January 13, 2005 8:51 PM CST

Chemo - shmemo! Not bothering our little boy!!! Little stomach aches, little headaches - but not enough to keep the legos from being built, the cartoons from being watched or making guest appearances at school. (I call them that because we always seem to get there late.)

Thanks for all the prayers! They are working - God is Good.

Don't forget to say a prayer for all sick children, our troops that have to be away from thier families and all the devastation with Tsunami and the floods/mudslides. I don't want to leave out the families that are without thier loved ones tonight. I hope they are comforted. (It's so hard not to get wrapped up in our own problems and remember that there are others in need of prayer.)

Thanks for checking in on us. Don't forget to sign the guestbook. I love reading the entries to Cameron.

Tuesday, January 11, 2005 10:28 PM CST

Another snowstorm!!! I’m sure another snow day tomorrow.

One night of Chemo down – 4 more to go. Cameron went right to sleep. He said his stomach hurt, but he was a trouper. His Dr.’s appointment went well. I’m not sure if I mentioned that he seemed to be getting a little weaker. His left arm just hangs, he almost ignores it. Dr. Hagstom thinks that his weakness is just from him getting used to not using it so…… we are making him work that arm with everything he does. He thinks Cameron looks great. (He actually sang a song to us today and played the guitar – what a doctor!!) Cameron’s blood counts were really good and of course he was in a great mood and very silly during his check up until….. the needle. I feel so bad; she was moving it around in his little vein for about two minutes before he finally started to cry. She kept taking the tourniquet off then on. He was so brave. Just tears. Once it was over he was excited about his Sylvester & Tweety Band-Aid and the possibility that it was too late to go to school and he could finish his Lego snowboard ramp (and it was too late since we still had not had lunch). He did do his homework though. Then off to his room to work diligently on the Legos.

All else is well in the Brooks’ house. Charli is upstairs with her pajama’s inside out doing the snow dance (for those of you without crazy kids – that’s what you do to make school be cancelled). If this keeps up; they will be in school until July. We’ll see who’s not dancing then.

Please keep us in your prayers.

Sunday, January 9, 2005 1:06 PM CST

I’m so sorry for not updating this week, not much going on. Cameron is doing fine. He made it to school each day (except the school was closed on Thursday due to a snowstorm). Charles and I constantly struggle because I hate pressuring him to go to school when he wants to stay home and play. I feel like it’s not a priority – let him play. Charles thinks he should be back to as much of a normal life as possible. That includes school, riding the bus, doing homework and chores around the house; as long as he’s able he should do it. Even though he complains about going to school, once he gets there he loves it. His friends look forward to seeing him and Mrs. Clark always has fun lesson plans. I guess deep inside, Charles is right (like most of the time). Cameron is LIVING with this. God gave him some ability; we will be grateful and use it. (I will make him bring the trash cans in again!) It also means that I need to sign him up for karate just like he keeps asking. Like someone told me, about him getting hurt, “What’s the worse thing that can happen? a brain tumor? Well, too late for that! So let him play.” Harsh, but true!

Speaking of rough play, Thursday when we went out to play in the snow (Charli ditched us early), Cameron kept running to jump on the sled like a snowboard and falling and then laughing because the sled would fly up in the air. It was really fun! We actually did a lot of fun things this week, we visited friends, we went to Chili’s Friday night and we sit at the table and had a really fun dinner.

Charles and Cameron went to a UCONN basketball game yesterday (the girls lost – Cameron was sad) while Charli and I got our hair done then we went to visit friends. It was a good day.

Well, next week is a Chemo week. I’m going to assume that we won’t have any problems, but it’s kinda stressful either way. God knows what we can handle.

Cameron is looking forward to going to Maryland next weekend to see his cousins. My brother is being deployed to Iraq in February so we want to see him before he goes. (His wife is expecting in June – it really stinks.)

Please keep us in your prayers.

Wednesday, January 5, 2005 5:30 PM CST

Not much going on in the Brooks household. We’ve been having a good week so far. We are expecting snow tonight so it looks like a snow day tomorrow. Yeah!!

Cameron is doing fine. He’s still in a great mood. He’s made it to school all this week. Charli is preparing for her first basketball game this weekend! We can’t wait to see her.

Please keep us in your prayers and all the other families with sick children.

Carla

Saturday, January 1, 2005 9:31 PM CST

2005!!! I can’t believe it. I hope that everyone brought the New Year in a very special way. We spent ours together. Cameron said he never saw the ball drop so – of course – this was going to be the year for that. Let me go back, we took a short trip to New Jersey to visit friends on Thursday. Charli went to stay with her BFF Jen and wanted to see her other BFF Rebecca (BFF stands for Best Friend Forever for all of the non-internet readers) so she was happy as could be. Cameron and I stayed with our old next door neighbor, Therese. (It was strange staying next to the house we lived in for 8 years and not stopping by.) Therese was wonderful and let 15 of our closest friends come over to visit at her house. She even cooked for us. Cameron had a great time playing with Jack and Joseph, just like old times. We saw other friends and neighbors that made me kinda home sick. We just laughed and talked about old times. It's so good to get away and get the tumor off of your mind and enjoy the memories and the moment!

Friday we had breakfast with Ivy and her son Anthony. Ivy watched Cameron from before he was 2 until he started kindergarten – everyday, all day. She loves him as if he were her own son and Anthony loves Cameron as a brother. We actually went to breakfast with more friends, I updated the pictures. These friends were our family when we were down there since we had no family in New Jersey. Cameron had fun letting Ivy feed him and laying on her getting spoiled. He’s been telling me Ivy stories every since we left. We could not have found anyone better than Ivy to be there when we couldn’t.

New Year’s Eve, we woke up at 11:30. Watched the ball drop and toasted with Champagne and Ginger Ale (the kids had the Ginger Ale!). It was just us and very special. I know that we each felt it in our own way.

Today we played Simpson’s Clue and the SpongeBob DVD game (even Charles). We laughed, the kids played outside and rode their scooters, we ate really well and just relaxed. Cameron played with this skateboard track that he’s been playing with for the last 2 days, but just enjoyed being in whatever room his daddy is in. Even if they aren’t playing together he’s happy that he’s there.

Cameron was picked for one of the tumbleweed featured kids of the month. Check it out – it’s pretty cool. January featured child

Keep us in your prayers! This has to be the year of the cure!

Wednesday, December 29, 2004 2:48 PM CST

Another great family trip! This time we went skiing in Stratton ,Vermont. We stayed with our friends the Siebers. Their home there was right on the mountain, it was really nice. Charles decided to continue with his snowboarding, but Charli, Cameron and I decided to venture out and try to ski. Our lesson was at 8:30 am on Monday and it was about 5 degrees outside!!!! Needless to say, we didn’t have that much fun. We weren’t dressed for the weather. (well we were dressed for cold weather, but that’s crazy) After our lesson, we all went back to their house to regroup. We sat by the fire and had hot chocolate and watched the skiers – from the inside. It was fun. Glen played games with Cameron and I relaxed. Then we waited for the sun, added some better winter gear and went back out. Glen strapped Cameron on to this harness and took him up the lift and down the mountain a few times. He made Glen pay him a dollar to go, but he really had fun. Then Charli and I went on the lift and Glen led us down the mountain (they call it a bunny hill, but it was pretty steep to us.) Cameron decided he would snowboard on Tuesday and Charli was going down the hill on skis almost by herself and wanted to ski again on Tuesday. They both had a great time! Charli loved skiing and Charles took Cameron snowboarding and they had a lot of fun. I really enjoyed the fireplace, the snacks and all the really cute ski outfits. Charles challenged himself to every trail he could. Thank goodness he wore a helmet or I would have to be writing from a hospital in VT. He sure wasn’t acting like this was his second time on a board.

It was a lot of fun. We are so lucky to have friends that invite us to places. Thank you very much – Glen, Barb, Andrew, Jen and Kevin!!! We can’t wait to do it again.

Cameron had a Dr.’s appointment yesterday. Dr. Hagstrom thinks he looks good. He thinks that some weaknesses have gotten better and others have stayed the same. I agree. We think he’s doing very well. Thanks for all the prayers. Keep asking for a cure! Cameron and all the other children deserve it!

Well, I think we are going out to dinner! Yeah – no dishes! Then a family game of something. We are going to NJ tomorrow to visit friends so I will update on Friday! New Year’s Eve.

Sunday, December 26, 2004 11:46 AM CST

Merry Christmas! I hope that everyone that checks in on us had a magical day filled with family and friends. Christmas was very nice here at the Brooks house. We got off to a rough start. Charli sprained her ankle Thursday night, so Friday we woke up to Charli with a swollen ankle and Cameron with a headache and sore throat (he had some other signs of Strep on Thursday, but no sore throat). I wanted to take them both to the Dr, but they were closed for the Holiday. Charles was convinced Charli’s ankle was just sprained do he made he soak her foot in a bucket of ice water!! I felt so bad for her. Since the Dr. wasn’t in, we went to the ER to get a throat culture so that we wouldn’t be in the ER on Christmas day. No Strep throat, but a sinus infection and the antibiotics knocked the symptoms out in a day. It was such a busy Christmas Eve day, but it was actually a pretty quiet Christmas Eve night. We usually do something fun together as a family or go to church, but ….. just wasn’t feeling like it.

Christmas morning was really fun. Charli and Cameron had so many gifts under the tree. They were so typical. Charli opened all her gifts in about 5 minutes with a ton of drama and excitement, even about her socks. She got a mini iPod and was already trying to figure out songs while Cameron was on about his 4th gift. Analyzing each one and telling us some long story about where he saw it or who has it or exactly when he told us he wanted it. Details, details, details!!! In between he filled them with, “Remember when…” stories that may have happened 3 years ago. We all sat around, waited and listened. He even had to tell a story about the Sponge Bob towel and wash cloth set. Finally he finished and went upstairs and played with one gift for an hour – his K’nex. Charli & I went to have a very fun breakfast with some neighbors. The day was very peaceful, the kids played (actually together), Charles watched football and I watched some old movies. We had a great dinner. It was a good day.

Well, now we have to get packed for a few days in Vermont – skiing this time.

I updated a picture! Check out Cameron fighting Shrek – I have a really funny video, but haven’t figured out how to add it.

Please have a wonderful holiday and thank you for all your prayers and keeping our family in your heart!

Merry Christmas!!!

Thursday, December 23, 2004 6:43 PM CST

I can’t believe that it’s Thursday already. It’s been a pretty good week. The weather in CT has been a little wacky. The snow kept both Charli and Cameron home from school on Monday, but wasn’t bad enough to keep us in the house. We hit the mall, yes; even Cameron wanted to go to the mall. He had money burning a hole in his pocket and wanted to get a certain gift for his daddy. It was a fun snow day. Cameron went to school every day this week, he’s been doing great.

The children in Cameron’s class gave him an incredible gift this week. They each read their favorite book on tape for Cameron. It is one of the cutest things I’ve ever heard. They each read stories for the days that Cameron’s not able to come to school. They gave him the books to follow along. It is really adorable – Mrs. Clark is truly an exemplary teacher always incorporating learning and compassion. We are so lucky to have her this year. Today was his party and they had a great time.

I can’t believe tomorrow is Christmas Eve already. It is going to be a great Christmas. We are going skiing on Sunday and the whole family is just going to hang out all week. What ever we want to do – we are going to do it.

I have to get Charli from basketball practice. She never slows down. I have one more gift to get for Charles and I’ll be done.

I’ll update Christmas day! God bless each of you and thanks so much for checking in.

Sunday, December 19, 2004 7:08 PM CST

If it weren’t for the Cancer part; I’d say we were living some kind of dream where everything is just fun and people are so nice. I don’t know where to start. First off, Cameron is doing fine. He is so silly and very happy 95% of the time. (I took out the 5% whenever he looks at the presents under the tree and can’t open them.) We all had a very good weekend. Cameron spent most of the day in school on Friday; he was so pooped when I picked him up. He perked right up when we got home. My Uncle Bub and Aunt Kathy were here visiting from NC. He beat Kathy a few times in Connect Four, which always makes Cameron happy.

Earlier when Cameron was on his steroid induced eating frenzy, he constantly wanted ribs and crabs. Ribs, we could cook, no big deal, but crabs! We often bought crabs in Jersey during the summer, but that just wasn’t happening - not in CONN - not in DECEMBER! When I got home on Friday, there was a box on my step! My friend Dana sent us a bushel of steamed blue crabs in Old Bay! They were incredible! We invited over some neighbors, Charli had a friend over and we had our 1st party for the weekend on Friday night. Dana – they were so good thanks a bunch.

Saturday, Charles put the pool table together and our friends from NJ the Espinos came to visit. The kids (actually they aren’t kids any more – all of them over 21, but they used to baby-sit Charli and Cameron when they were teenagers, all four of them) played PlaysStation with Cameron and they played pool. He used to love to walk to their house when we lived in New Jersey. We had so much fun. That was our 2nd party for the weekend.

We sponsored a less fortunate family this Christmas with some friends of Charles’, so we went to a party to wrap the gifts. It was really fun. Charli baked cookies with her friends’ earlier and added to the dessert tray, she was so helpful wrapping also. All children should have something on Christmas! It’s part of the magic of the holiday. Last year they said the kids asked for coats and shoes and school supplies, which made me sad, I can’t believe how much we take for granted. However, that was party number 3!!!!

Today, we had friends over to make fudge and other snacks for Christmas. Cameron couldn’t wait to take them downstairs to play pool – again!!!. We had chili-cheese dip (the kids favorite) and it was just like another party. Charli and the other girls did a lot of the baking. It was really a lot of fun. It was party number 4!

Cameron fell asleep at 7:00, but he had a smile on his face all weekend. We are so blessed! It was another great weekend of memories that we will cherish (except I was very bad about taking pictures this weekend.) Less then one week until Christmas, make sure that you enjoy it!

Thanks for the prayers! Please continue to pray for a cure and strength to all the families that need some extra!

Don’t forget to make the best out of each day! Thank God for every gift - things could always be worse!

Thursday, December 16, 2004 3:19 PM CST

We have to be careful what we write on the web page. Guess what came to our door today? A Pool Table. Cameron was so excited this morning when Charles told him it was coming. He practically waited at the top of the steps for an hour until it came. Fortunately, Charles will have to put it together otherwise Cameron might not have gone to school today. He can’t wait to play. We will have to order pizza and invite our handy friends over for a pool assembly party. We don’t know how to thank so many people for finding special things that make this time so much easier.

Cameron went to school today. Mrs. Clark said he was fine and they had a great science lesson. He’s having no problems with the Chemo; he takes it along with the other meds he has to take with no problems. He goes right to sleep and wakes up just as happy as he always has. Ready to play Playstaion before the rest of us wake up. We can definitely see changes in his walking and he’s back to holding his hand closed, but he’s still getting around pretty well and not complaining about anything hurting. Charles promised him $20 when this week is over of chemo and he stays on line looking for what he’s going to buy with it. (Not that he doesn’t have enough toys to start his own toy store.)

We received a preliminary MRI report and the tumor was basically unchanged. Not good news, but not necessarily bad news. Radiation is still working, so we will be patient and wait for the miracle.

Again thanks to all of you that check in and special thanks to all my friends that let me call or write and vent (You know who you are.) Please know that I don’t mean to put my burdens on you, but I know that I can and you will always be there to for me.

Please keep praying for strength for us and healing for Cameron and the other children. Also, pray for all the parents who have lost children this year to get through the holiday season missing their loved ones.

9 more days! (I bought them the cutest gifts today, it’s taking everything not to give it to them now.)

Monday, December 13, 2004 8:41 PM CST

Everything went will with the MRI. Unfortunately there was a misunderstanding (after I spent so much time on the phone and have a message confirming sedation) and he wasn't scheduled for sedation. Cameron was very brave; he had the MRI with nothing and kept very still. Even after they had to try twice to get the catheter (a small tube that is inserted into his vein so that they can inject a chemical agent that makes a contrast in the images) and that looked like it really hurt. Actually, it was much better this way because he was fine right after, we went to Macaroni Grill and he said that it was worth the two gifts that he got.

They said it will take three days for the radiologist’s report, so we don't know anything.

Thanks for checking in and for all your thoughts and prayers. We appreciate them more than you could ever imagine.

Carla

Sunday, December 12, 2004 9:59 PM CST

What a great weekend!! Vermont was so fun. We stayed at our friends’ house in Okemo, VT, the Blooms. (Much thanks to them - even though they don’t check the webpage that often). :)

Cameron told me Saturday that it was the best day of his life. It brought tears to me eyes - he was so happy. Charli and Cameron took snowboarding lessons together and Charles, Aunt Toni and I took an adult one. It was soooo hard, but I kept looking over and seeing Charli and Cameron snowboarding down the hill and Toni and I were always on the ground. The kids were awesome. Cameron took it very seriously and followed directions to a tee. He was hopping with that board and flying down the hill. It seemed like that leg weakness just disappeared for the day. He was smiling the whole time we were there, Charli was too. Charles actually did pretty well, he went on intermediate lift and tumbled (he called it snowboarding) down the hill a few times. It was very funny to watch (from the bottom of the hill where we were). He thinks he’s ready for competitions now. I can barely move now, but now I had to update. Toni and I both were hurting in muscles we didn’t know we had.

After snowboarding all morning, the kids went to the pool. They had a great time (They were joined by Andrea and Jennifer Bloom and two other friends’ children – Luke and Jake). They got in the hot tub, the 6 kids sat around and talked, it was very cute. They looked like miniature adults.

Overall, it was really a great weekend; Cameron wants to try skiing now.

Our MRI is tomorrow at 2:30. We couldn’t get a date with an Anesthesiologist, so Cameron will only get a sedative. I’m sure he will be still; he’s been so good through everything. I told him they are going to take pictures of his head in a big machine and he said, “I have an MRI tomorrow?” (I can’t believe he knew what that was.) We are going to try to keep him up late and wake him early so he’s really tired. There’s only one thing that keeps Cameron awake- PlayStation. So we hit Blockbusters and he used his Blockbuster Gift Card and bought Spongebob Bikini Bottom. He said he knows how to get to the last level. He’ll be up until he does it!! They tell us that this MRI will not really show anything. It will be used as a baseline for future MRI’s. The radiation is still working. So, we are not too stressed.

We start the next round of Chemo (Temodar) on Tuesday, this will be a change from an 80mg dose to a 200mg dose, so we don’t know what to expect. He will do 200mg for 5 days. I’m sure he’ll be fine, but I will keep everyone posted even if it’s short.

Keep us in your prayers!

Carla

Friday, December 10, 2004 9:11 AM CST

It’s Friday! Cameron’s going to school for a few hours while Aunt Toni and I get some last minute shopping in. Then, off to Vermont! The whole family is very excited. Cameron has been practicing all the moves from his PS game. (I don’t think he has taken into account he’s never snowboarded before.) Our lessons are at 8:30. We are going to Okemo.

He was at school most of the yesterday. Mrs. Clark said he had a great time at recess, lots of running and playing. He scored 4 goals in gym. He had a great day. He was pretty wired by the time Aunt Toni got here.

Well, check back for Sunday’s update!!

TTFN (that means Ta Ta For Now)

Cameron’s mom.

Tuesday, December 7, 2004 6:49 PM CST

I decided to add a quick new journal entry just because we had a Dr.'s appointment today. Cameron is doing fine. His Dr. still thinks he's pretty strong still and even though his foot is dragging, we should wait to get on the steroids. I guess that is good news. We had problems with his veins again - poor thing - they tried everything again but he still had to have a few sticks to get blood and then more for an IV drip. He was very funny, crying in pain and laughing at his movie - at the same time! It amazes me each time how fast he recovers and he just forgets and moves on. Letting go and moving on!

He also only lost 2 lbs. so even though he's not eating much he must be getting some nutrition. No need for worry. (I'm still going to sneak an Ensure or Boost in when he's not paying attention!)

Over all, pretty good day!

Please keep checking in - 3 more days until Vermont.

By the way people keep asking how we are doing…..we are all hanging in there enjoying these fun times. Enjoying every smile and laugh that we get from each other! Each of us finding our own way to cope with the changes and heavily relying on all the wonderful people that we have around us; near and far. Thanks for asking.

Keep up the prayers for Cameron, our family (and friends that have been effected by this also) and all of the other adorable children and their families that are effected by this awful disease and the families that are entering this tough season with

Gotta get Charli from b-ball practice. She got an A on her cytoplasm project (Thanks Aunt Alexis!)

Monday, December 6, 2004 8:14 AM CST

Another weekend has passed. I want time to slow down a bit, yet I’m looking forward to next week (snowboarding) and Christmas. Again Cameron has been in a great mood all weekend. We sat at the dinner table Sunday, just the four of us, laughing until tears were rolling from all of our eyes. It was so much fun.

It was a fairly busy weekend, Friday we had an appointment with his Radiation Oncologist. She said he looks great. Cameron couldn’t get to school Friday because the plumber was coming and Cameron doesn’t want to take the bus yet. So he only made it 3 out of the 5 days last week. He’s still doing pretty well. He’s hardly eating anything at all. He used to be a poor eater before this tumor, but now it’s worse. I’ll talk to his Dr. on Tuesday. I think we will try those nutrition shakes.

Good friends of ours from Jersey came up for the weekend. Sue came to help decorate (you wouldn’t believe how great it looks) and we stayed up all hours gabbing like college roommates. Charles took the kids to a UCONN basketball game. Cameron didn’t want to go, but had the best time. He was really into the game. He’s looking forward to the next one.

We also went to a Time for Life Party. A local family support group for families with children with Cancer. It was really nice. Both Charli and Cameron got great gifts.

Charli and her schoolmate made a cytoplasm cake (pretty gross), so Cameron was pouting that he couldn’t have any. I thought I would have to bake later; those cheeks make it even harder for me to say, no. Then, Mrs. Clark, his teacher, came over with some brownies!! Perfect timing!

The kids are getting so excited about Christmas!

Well, I’m taking him to school, late again.

I have pictures to add so check back in tomorrow!

Thursday, December 2, 2004 8:56 AM CST

Things are going pretty well so far this week. Cameron has been in the greatest moods this week. Dr. Hagstrom, his oncologist, thinks his weakness is acute and we should wait a week or so to start any steroids. He is still very pleased. Cameron made it to school twice this week so far and we are on our way today. He has just really been silly these few days.

Charli started basketball practice. It’s every Tues and Thursday from 7-9. They worked her little butt off. She really enjoyed it though.

I went to a jewelry party on Monday (my neighbor – raising money for Cameron!!!) and quite a few people were asking about my awareness bracelet, so I added the link to my links. They are very nice. Proceeds will go to help with research. She also makes these really cute earrings with the awareness ribbon.

No other real news. We moved the ski trip to next weekend – Cameron can’t wait. Charli is pretty excited too and Aunt Toni’s coming up to hang out. It’s going to be so much fun.

We are getting the kids pictures taken this week to send out Christmas cards, so all of our friends make sure you drop me an email with your address so I can get them in the mail. (Don’t leave it on the message board – I know my friends.)

By the way thank you to all of you that have been there for us!

Gotta get Cameron to school before he changes his mind.

Sunday, November 28, 2004 9:46 PM CST

What a wonderful Thanksgiving! First off, Cameron is doing ok. We noticed his left side weakness coming back and his eye straying a little more. We aren’t sure whether it is just post radiation changes or the fact that we’ve weaned the steroids, it really doesn’t matter. We just pray that it’s not the tumor. There is no way to know right now. Fortunately, we don’t have time to worry about what it is; it didn’t stop him from having a great vacation. He’s still walking, playing and laughing and he’s not in any pain. God is good!

I added new pictures!! I bought software to make a collage so I could put more pictures up.

Wednesday Cameron went to see the SpongeBob movie with his Grand Carol and cousins. I heard he picked a seat right up front in the middle and sat on the edge of his chair laughing the whole time. He said it was so good that he had to see it again.

By the time Charli and I got to Maryland, he had become a pool shark. He played a lot of pool with his cousins. I guess that’s what Santa might have to bring to our house. He played Pictionary, basketball and badminton. He had so much fun. He was in good spirits all weekend.

Charli and Cameron spent Thanksgiving with both sets Grandparents. Not all children have both sets of Grandparents growing up. We are very blessed. There was a lot to be thankful for this year.

Cameron mentioned how he wanted to go to the beach - soooooo, in 40 degree weather, on Friday we went to Ocean City, MD. They could have been giving away free things at the stores on Black Friday and it could have been 10 degrees outside – we were going to the beach. Carla, Charli, Cousin William, Aunt Toni and Cameron headed out to frolic in the sand and see the waves. Believe it or not, there were actually quite a few other people out there, even some people surfing. It was 40 degrees outside!!! The sun was shining and there were a few stores and rides open so we had a really good time. I added a picture.

As Grand Carol decorated her tree, I realized that I was going to have to make our house very festive this year. We were going to celebrate the whole season. Charli and I went all over looking for things to decorate our house. (We weren’t very good about doing this early the last few years.) That became my new mission. I was going to have the house lit up even if I had to climb a ladder myself!!!! Then after a long ride home to CT, it was 10:30 as we turned on our street, I was actually jealous when I saw that someone already had their house all lit up. Then Charles & I looked at each other and realized it was OUR HOUSE!!!!! Our neighbors had our house decorated!!!!! We all screamed!! It looked so pretty. We're so lucky!! Our house looks great. We put the tree up today and will be decorating all week!!!!! BIG! BIG – Thank You again to the neighbors.

Again as we write our update we have so much to be thankful for. Even though we constantly worry and try so hard not to think about how this has affected our lives, people around us make it very hard to be bitter or sad. (and believe me that’s not an easy task) I’ve been visiting this church and the messages have been about how God talks to us. One of the ways is through family and friends. We are a true testimony to that. We are very blessed with support.

Don’t forget to say prayers for all the children and parents that desperately need them tonight!

Check back for more updates and pictures.

Monday, November 22, 2004 1:04 PM CST

I can’t believe it! We didn’t see the Spongebob movie this weekend. Charles was not feeling well and the weather was not very good. Cameron harassed us all weekend about when is he going to Maryland. He was relentless about getting his clothes and toys packed. The boys left yesterday to ride and visit Aunt Toni then onto Salisbury. Charli and I will fly down Tuesday after she gets out of school. I miss them so much already, but I hear they are playing golf today. My cousin Tami and her daughter Logan are visiting form PA so we will take a trip to Rainforest Café tonight. (Girls night out) Cameron refuses to go there. He can’t stand that place, plus it’s in the mall which is not his favorite place to go either.

His cousins will all be at Grand Carol’s house on Wednesday so I will update from MD; hopefully with some pictures.

Thanks for checking in. Keep up the prayers for us and all the children and their families that are suffering from cancer. The other caringbridge families that you see that have signed the guestbook have been my support group. Please check in and sign their guest books.

Make sure you spend some time with family and friends during this holiday season – if you learn anything from Cameron’s illness make sure you know that family and friends are invaluable and EVERY day counts. Don’t use any excuses - spend time with loved ones!!! They won’t be around forever.

Carla

Friday, November 19, 2004 4:16 PM CST

I can’t believe I haven’t updated. Yesterday was our last day of radiation. It was kinda sad because the people at Gray Cancer Center were so great. I will miss seeing them everyday. The neighbors celebrated with a party at Chuck E. Cheese’s. That’s Cameron’s favorite place. He was so excited! The people there were so nice to him. He was a little grumpy, and just wanted to play by himself. I blame that on the weaning of the steroids. He went to school today, after a big fight about it. He actually wanted us to agree that he would only go for lunch and recess! We negotiated, Lunch, Recess and 1 hour, however when I went to pick him up he wanted to stay!

Our last day of any steroids is Sunday and our next MRI is scheduled for December 13, 2004. I'm not sure how we will sleep until then, but they tell us that it may not show too much. There could be swelling so soon after radiation. As much as we hate not knowing, we are trying so hard to focus on how great he's doing now and take each day at a time. Keep praying for healing for Cameron and strength for the rest of us!

Hopefully we will see the Sponge Bob movie this weekend. Oh! Guess what Cameron got in the mail yesterday……An actual cell from one of the Sponge Bob episodes. It’s signed by Stephen Hillenburg, the creator of Spongebob!!! It’s so neat. A friend of ours sent it to him. He thought it was the coolest thing ever. They told us to come to LA for a tour. That might be added to our list of places to go! LA – here we come.

We will update on Monday.

Wednesday, November 17, 2004 6:49 AM CST

Cameron is still progressing. He took the last of the first set of chemo treatments on Monday. (The clinical trial that he is in continues with a higher dose of chemo one week each month for 10 months we have a 4 week break). We were all so glad not to have to do that last night. He ends radiation on Thursday and the best news is we will be ending the steroids on Sunday. He will not be on any medication next week!!!! It seems so scary.

We were told to prepare ourselves for the after effects of radiation, but it’s not going to stop us from going to Maryland for Thanksgiving or our ski/snowboard trip in December (maybe 2) and Disney in February! We will cross each bridge when we get to them.

It’s hard to believe how well he’s doing. He is really almost back to the way he was. We see little changes in his personality, but we’re sure it’s made him a stronger person and look forward to hear him speaking about this when he’s older.

Cameron said the bath picture was embarrassing, so I replaced with a shot of him throwing a snowball last weekend.

As for school, Cameron would rather go to radiation everyday (which he admitted he likes because the ride on the table) then go to school all day. He’s really gotten used to being a couch potato. He will make it 4 days this week if I have to carry him out myself.

Please keep up the prayers! We need a cure and we need it soon.

Friday, November 12, 2004 2:21 PM CST

It’s Friday!!! Another week has flown by. Cameron is doing very well. His Dr’s and Therapist are all very pleased. This tumor picked the wrong little boy to mess with!! He’s doing great.

We just came home from an hour at school. We are having a little snow storm here in Connecticut. Cameron is finding it pretty funny that his Aunt Delores (from Florida) has never seen snow. He’s in a great mood! Charli has finished her scrapbook – the school project that has been monopolizing our lives!!! It’s going to e a fun weekend. We can’t wait.

Well, the goal for the weekend is to get a picture page up. For now – I’ve added the Sponge Bob room and Halloween with his class (he’s the one in the Karate suit) as well as a Jacuzzi photo (just because it’s so cute).

Check back soon and keep praying!

PS – 4 more days of radiation.

Monday, November 8, 2004 8:47 PM CST

It was another great weekend. The house was full and Cameron was so glad to wake up and find kids sleeping all over the place. Unfortunately, he got 2 new Playstation Games this weekend; he was up until 1:00am. on Saturday (Cameron could play all night if we let him.) Thanks Shani, Jen and Cindy!!!!! We were pretty excited that he was back to the old ‘Playstation’ Cameron though. He loves that thing. Charles made him go outside for a while. He actually rode his bike. It was pretty amazing.

As with most kids, this weekend was a Shrek 2 movie weekend. (For those of you without children the movie came out on DVD Friday) I still haven’t stayed away past the first half hour, but I’ve seen that part 3 times.

Charli had 4 friends over and they lit a fire and roasted marshmallows. Cameron was right out there with them. He loves to be with Charli & her friends (which he thinks are his friends too).

Not much else to talk about. 8 more Radiation Treatments.

Keep checking in.

Check out this web site - www.designsbyjen.com/awareness_bracelets.html. My neighbors had bracelets made for Charli & I. They are beautiful. Proceeds go to a cancer charity. We got the stones for Childhood Cancer, but they have ones that promote Brain Cancer Awareness. (Brain Cancer still sounds strange to me.) Check it out! Christmas is around the corner.

Please keep praying for us.

Thursday, November 4, 2004 9:36 AM CST

Cameron is back to school! His Dr.s recommended he go back on a part-time schedule. He didn’t seem too happy at first, but seemed to get pretty excited to go today. It’s pajama day, but he’ll be doing schoolwork.

I need to back up….. Monday a group of angels knocked on our door with paint. They painted Cameron’s room. It was a lovely shade of pink from the prior owners, but it just wasn’t right for Cameron. Now – it’s the happiest shade of blue. You can’t help but smile when you walk up the stairs. Guess who’s on the wall? SPONGEBOB!!! Marcy hand painted a mural of Sponge Bob. It’s incredible. Then as a plus – Charli got a paint job in her room also. We went from turquoise to purple, her signature color. She got new bedding and is now going to make a mess in a pretty purple room. Laury, Laura and Marcy – you have no idea how grateful we are. We are so lucky to have you.

We have a whole crew coming from NJ today (about 10!!) we are going to party like it’s 1999. (LOL to all the Prince fans). Grandma Lodie and Mom-mom (Cameron’s grandma and great-grandmother) are cooking and cleaning. Thanks – you guys are the best.

Cameron’s blood counts are fine and his Dr.s are very pleased with his progress. He has 11 more radiation treatments to go. We are still slowly decreasing the steroids. We are going to have a great holiday season! God is good!!

Keep up the prayers! They are working!

Sunday, October 31, 2004 9:55 PM CST

OK – We will work on updating more frequently. Time just goes by so fast.

Cameron is doing well. He’s actually getting much stronger. We decreased the steroids on Tuesday so we are hoping not to see any changes (except his belly). He made it to school on Friday for an hour. It was great. He seemed really happy. His teacher and classmates made him feel really special. Thanks Mrs. Clark and the 2nd grade class!!! He never stopped smiling. They wrote a story about him and they had a chance to ask him questions. I think he felt like some movie star or something. He can’t wait for pajama day next week.

His cousins Alex and Alana were here for the weekend. Cameron loves having little people come to visit him, even when they touch his GameBoy that he doesn’t really like to share. He gave them both a ride in his corvette. Cameron also had a visit from his Grandpa Tally who even got up and did the Sponge Bob dance with him. (I’ll save those pictures for black mail).

Saturday night Cameron was up until almost 11:00 building a Lego golf course for his dad, fully equipped with a sand trap, greens and three tees. He even put together a golf cart. I must add – he works very hard to use both hands. We were all impressed.

Halloween was fun. We had a neighborhood party (which we seem to do often) and then trick or treated. With a little lift from a neighbor (thanks Dave); Cameron made it to every house with enough energy to eat brownies when he returned. He offered to sell me his sweet tarts for $20.

On a not so great note, Aunt Toni and Carla went to the Brain Tumor symposium in Boston. We both came back a little discouraged. Everything that’s new and all the changes that have been made are not for brainstem gliomas. There is still not much out there for us. We were rather discouraged. Then today I got an email with Mark 2:1-12. The hope was restored. He was also added to another prayer chain, another 140 people. That feels great. Keep up the prayers and the great notes.

Well, it’s 11:00 and Cameron is asking for Easy Mac (hush Toni – we’ll start the healthy foods tomorrow)

Carla & Charles

PS – I don’t want to leave out Charli, she had another great weekend. She went to another dance and met more friends. She also got to Rain Forest Café, we can’t go with Cameron because the place scares him.

Tuesday, October 26, 2004 8:30 AM CDT

So sorry that we haven't kept up with the updates. I did add new pictures today though. We have truly been very busy. Cameron has had really great days. We've hit the half way point with radiation, three more weeks left. We don't do another MRI until after the treatments are over, so we must wait patiently and continue to pray and have faith that His miracles are working.

I just bought some of the LiveStrong bracelets that Lance Armstrong is sponsoring to help people with cancer. The message is about living! Well, with all of the wonderful family, incredible neighbors and our friends, living in not a suggestion; it's a demand. Cameron has no time to be sick - there is just too much going on.

Thursday, October 21
Yesterday was a remarkable day. Cameron was bored all day, we were worried that he's just getting drained. His routine prior to this escapade was to come home from school and ride his bike with neighbors until dinner. We can tell that riding his bike is one activity (unlike going to school and bringing in the trash cans) that Cameron really misses. Well, talk about angels, the wonderful people in our neighborhood got together and bought Cameron a battery operated miniature Corvette. They (about 12 of them) knocked on the door and unveiled this incredible automobile; he was so surprised! He jumped right in and couldn't stop smiling. He was so happy to be back on the streets!!! The car is incredible, it has a radio and headlights. He parked it right in Charles' spot in the garage. He can't stop telling everyone that he owns a car.

Friday, October 22
I think the excitement spilled over into today, he had a lot of fun at his therapy and was using his left arm & leg to try to race the therapist. She told me that we have to stop helping him and make him use his left side. He can do it. He was throwing with it to knock down bowling pins. It's hard to see him struggle with things he could do so well, but we know it will make him stronger.

Saturday, October 23
Cousin Daniel is here now, and brought Spider Man silly string. (I added the picture to the Web) This is now all over our yard. They had a great time! We went for ice cream and the boys argued about everything just like normal.

Sunday, October 24
Due to scheduling at the Center; Cameron had to have radiation today. He let his Uncle Danny go in with him. Then, a surprise visit from NJ, Ms. Mutz, Cameron's 1st grade teacher and her husband came to visit him. He couldn't stop smiling again. He became very particular about what he said and did, making sure to make her proud.

Monday, October 25
Another surprise day!! The folks from Charles' job sent a clown over for Cameron. All the neighbors came and he had such a great time. The smile never left his face. The kids were great. Because of the timing he had to take a quick medicine break - no one even knew. He really just left took his meds and came back smiling. No problems. We were very proud of him.

So now it's Tuesday and we have our blood work day. The worst day of the week for Cameron. We're sure he will handle it like a trouper.

The Brooks'

Thursday, October 21, 2004 7:45 AM CDT

Carla let me do the update since I’m (Grandcarol) visiting.
Cameron is usually sweet and cheerful in the morning, but he's a bit tired (he says bored) this morning (and disappointed that we ran out of bread). I went with him to the hospital yesterday and noticed right away that he knows his way around, looking for his favorite people and “the candy man.” After radiation, which he so bravely endures, he gets fatigued. Everything gets tired but his appetite. The steroids keep him eating until his little jaws look like they will pop. I even had to hide my diet pepsi from him because if it is food, solid or liquid, look out…..into Cameron’s mouth it goes. I tried to help with the lego stuff last night since he doesn’t have strong use of his left hand but he politely told me I was not too good at it and he’d wait for his daddy’s help. All of the family keep coming up to help and to be with Cameron. He's looking forward to his cousin's visit this week (Lil Daniel is 6 and "playmate family." More fun than "grandma family.")
Well it’s the start of the morning. Cameron’s on the look-out for food. ‘Off’ with the morning news and 'on' with the cartoons and breakfast and snack #1 and snack #2 and snack #3 and…..... I'm hiding my diet pepsi.

Not only is Cameron a real trooper but so are Carla, Charles and Charli. The days are very busy, but they don't seem to notice. Going for his treatment every morning; going to see about his eyeglasses; going for his physical therapy; going for his new prescriptions. He has blood work done on Tuesdays and this week his counts were fine. I see improvement in his motor skills since I was here last and his balance is much improved. His new eyeglasses will help with the double vision. All of us are keeping the faith, staying strong and upbeat, and being so thankful for so many who are praying and who passionately care and who help keep hope alive. We just know God’s miracle is on the way.

Sunday, October 17, 2004 7:37 PM CDT

Another few great days! We got Cameron’s school pictures back that he took in September so we updated the front page. Also, we took a picture at the hospital on Friday with George (the build-a bear from our wonderful neighbor), who goes to every radiation treatment with Cameron. He actually gets strapped to the table as well. His cousins went with him on Friday and he was so happy to show them what he goes through. I think he thinks its fun now. He gets a gift on Friday so he definitely had a great day.

Again a house full of family, it was great. Everyone is helping in so many different ways. Thanks!!!

We can tell that treatment is wearing on him because he’s so tired – he only jumps up to dance to his favorite Sponge Bob songs rather than dancing to all of them. He naps frequently, but wakes up in a great mood. He’s still laughing at passing gas until the tears roll down his face and we have to tell him, “Breathe, Cameron, ,Breathe”. Boys will be boys.

His appetite is definitely the biggest change. We are shocked that someone so small can eat so much food. (We know it’s from the medicine, but we are still shocked.) It took both Aunt Melanie and Grandma cooking to keep up with him. He’s very cute!! Grand Carol is coming on Tuesday – bring your apron.

Charli is doing fine as well, she’s looking forward to spending the day at the hospital on Tuesday - Radiation, Bloodwork, Occupational Therapy then Physical Therapy. She’ll be glad to go back to school!

Don’t forget to pass on the web-site and keep sending us notes. The outpourings of love and support from family and friends provide us with comfort and sustenance. We are learning to live each day as a gift and love having all of you a part of it! God is good!

Keep up the prayers!!!
___________________________________________________________

By the way, there was an error in my first journal entry,
we noticed on Saturday, September 25th not August 28th. We must have been looking at the wrong month. It’s only been three weeks! How quickly things can change.

Friday, October 15, 2004

Hello. Everyone is doing great. Today is the end of our second week of treatment and Cameron is becoming a real pro. He continues going about his daily routine with radiation, chemo, and of course his daily dose of Sponge Bob Square Pants. He has developed quite the appetite and seems to be regaining some strength back in his left side (according to the Brooks School of Medicine). Charles bought a portable DVD player so now Cameron gets to watch movies during the long appointments, which he really enjoys. Charli is doing good and even got to go with Charles to a UCONN football game Wednesday night. She had a blast. Cameron and Charli are excited to have visitors again and we all are looking forward to a great weekend.

We really appreciate all your messages and prayers and feel truly blessed that we have so many friends and family that care so much.

Monday, October 11, 2004 6:26 PM CDT

All is going well. Cameron had a great weekend. He was climbing on the neighbors play set and outside with the kids on Friday. On Saturday, Charles’ brother and family came to visit. He fixed the one sink that Cameron couldn’t turn the knob – now he can wash his hands (even though he doesn’t like to). We had family friends from NJ come to visit and we had a great time. He played football, baseball and didn’t want to come in. It’s so interesting to watch how he’s totally adapted himself to work around not using his left hand. He doesn’t even seem to let it bother him. We could all take a lesson from him. Since he has double vision, he just shuts one eye and keeps playing PlayStation or watching TV, not sweating the small stuff.

All the treatments and medications are becoming a routine. He’s doing very well, definitely not getting worse any more. We will keep praying and ask you all to do the same!!

He’s anxiously waiting for his next visitors!

Thursday, October 7, 2004 3:49 PM CDT

Hello, we can’t believe all the people that have visited this to the website! We read the notes to him. He’s doing very well. We are in and out of the radiation treatments in about 15 minutes now! He starts Physical Therapy next week. He’s looking forward to having gym without having to go to school (no offense to Mrs. Clark, his teacher.) He was outside playing with his friends yesterday and like normal, never wants to come in. He’s had his second chemotherapy treatment and hasn’t had any bad side effects.

Just a note to thank everyone who has read our webpage. This is an important way for us to keep everyone advised of our progress. As you can imagine, there is not enough time in the day to call or send notes to all of you who are near and dear to us to keep everyone updated, and this website provides us the opportunity to provide current information.

Please know that we are so moved by the inspirational, thoughtful and caring messages we have received from everyone we know & love personally, please keep them coming. It is a truly wonderful feeling to know how we are surrounded by special people both near and far who care so much about us.

Love,
Carla, Charles, Cameron and Charli

Tuesday, October 5, 2004 7:26 PM CDT

Yesterday was the first day of radiation. Cameron was such a trooper. I think he’s getting used to all these big machines. He played his favorite song from Charli’s Disney CD. He didn’t have a good afternoon so the Dr. put him on more medication for the nausea. We also started with the Decadron. (Look it up)

Charles and I gave Cameron his first Chemotherapy treatment tonight. We are hoping that he falls asleep and misses any side effects.

He was in such great spirits today. Charles bought Charli & Cameron Game Boy Advances and he couldn’t wait for Charli to get home to give it to her. He’s been playing with it all day and watching the same Sponge Bob video laughing over and over.

Please keep up the prayers!!

Monday, October 4, 2004 6:50 AM CDT

I guess I’ll give a little background information first. On Saturday, August 28, 2004, I noticed that Cameron was dragging his foot and holding is arm in a strange way. I stopped by his pediatrician. He told me to keep an eye on him and take him to the ER if he seemed to be stumbling or getting worse. Later on that afternoon, he was playing with his friends and seemed to be stumbling more than usual so I took him to the Emergency Room. That night they took a CT Scan and told us that he needed to be admitted for an MRI in the morning. The next morning, after the MRI, we were given the news that Cameron had a diffuse intrinsic pontine glioma. (Use the links to look it up if you want more information).

After hours of research, from family and friends, we took our Dr.’s advice. Cameron will participate in a clinical trial for a Chemotherapy Drug, called Temozolomide, while he goes through Radiation Therapy. He will have Radiation Monday through Friday everyday for six weeks, starting today, 10/4/04, as an outpatient. He will start his chemo treatment which we will give to him every night for 42 nights.

Cameron is still Cameron, he’s just as silly as always. He loves company! He’s not in any pain and not really too concerned about going back to school. He hates getting needles and those big machines, but seems to get over those problems as soon as they are over.

I will keep you posted about how he responds to his treatments.

Please keep the prayers coming.

BTW, Charli is doing well. She goes on a class trip to Cape Cod this week with school.

Saturday, October 2, 2004 9:01 PM CDT

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