Thank you for all of your continued cards, texts, meals, and prayers! We feel all the love! 

Chemo has continued every week, but there have been some adjustments needed each time. Side effects increased to a level that my team felt I had chemo toxicity. Given the fact that I have had 13 months of chemo at this point it is not surprising. In turn, they paused chemo for a little bit to let my extreme neuropathy  calm back down before continuing on with treatment.

There have been multiple times that my levels have totally bottomed out, meaning the bone marrow was not recovering between treatments and either it was deemed I was not able to receive treatment as a result, or the chemo dosage needed to be reduced. During those weeks I've had to be extra careful; wear a mask, not go in crowds, wash hands even more, and not eat raw fruits or vegetables. I am now only able to receive 60% of the chemo dosage, rather than 100%, as my body just can not tolerate it. But, when on chemo - anything can happen!

For example, I needed both an emergency CT, an MRI, and a biopsy, in addition to adding in an ENT and infectious disease doctor to my team all to determine that I also had mastoiditis, which was a very intense revelation.  We'd never even heard of the mastoid bone before, let alone did we know you could get a serious, potentially life threatening infection in it. Not only was there infection, but part of my mastoid bone is missing. Miraculously I was able to get through all of that and the infection just disappeared. Literally, just vanished! 

Good news, the chemo is working! Upon returning to this particular chemo protocol, the cancer indicators in my blood began to immediately drop by the 1000s! I am nowhere close to showing NED (no evidence of disease), but man did it give us some relief to see those numbers dropping! We wanted to frame the graph showing it happening! My team is very pleased as well. 

Ryan and I have enjoyed, if one can enjoy such a thing, being able to receive chemo infusions in the research lab now as part of being in the trial. The nurses and team in the research lab are just a delightful bunch! There are only 6 patients in the lab at a time, so the care is so incredibly personalized and you truly get to know each member of the nursing team. The vibe is quite different there than it is in the other infusion areas of the cancer center. Everyone there is determined to help fight cancer just that little extra through the very important research happening. 

However, it has been determined that my time with the trial needed to come to an end.  Trials have so many logistics in what your care team can and cannot do with your treatment because it is an experiment. There has to be continuity among all participating. It makes sense, but it is a lot of protocols to follow and at this time it just was not in my best interest to continue on. I was able to complete the main three months of the trial, the portion that others in the trial were receiving immunotherapy in addition to the chemo. I feel good about adding to the research that is taking place for Pancreatic Cancer in yet another way. I'd already donated blood, tissue from my tumors and more to help further research efforts as well. But, in order for my doctors to properly treat me and have some flexibility in my treatments I needed to come off the trial. They may continue to follow my scans and such over time, and I have invited the research coordinator to continue calling me just because I have loved working with her so much - she was a joy to have on our team.

My most recent scans indicate that my cancer is stable. It may be slightly better, but it is no worse. The chemo is working and we pray it will continue to do so. Keeping in mind that chemo is going to be indefinite for me, and that  I am doing "decent" at this time, we've decided to take a short break from treatment. I will pick it right back up in a few weeks. My team agreed to support my decision and made adjustments in the schedule as needed. 

Recently, I had the opportunity to gather together with three other women that have been on or are on this same journey. One has celebrated five years of being cancer free and has been an inspiration to me these past two years. The success of her Whipple and treatment was encouraging from the start! Another just rang the bell ending her post Whipple chemo treatments last week, thus beginning the next phase in her journey. A third woman, was ringing the bell last week after completing chemo, and radiation - as she prepares for her Whipple soon - more roads to traverse ahead of her as well. It was amazing to come together with these warriors, to laugh and cry, share our experiences, and instantly have a bond that is so strong. Thank you to the Sky Foundation for arranging this special gathering! 

There are others that I have met on this journey that are nearing the end of their time. Others that have already passed. Those touch my heart in a way I can not describe, and it is all too common among this group of us. This group of Pancreatic Cancer fighters, some also a Whipple warrior, is a group none of  us would have ever signed up for, nor do we wish for others to need to join, but here we are together in this unique way. Pray for us all. 

The journey is long, the battle is hard, cancer is taxing on us all. My family and I  would never have made it to this point without all of your support and prayers, the immense knowledge and guided care of my medical team, and each other.  There are more days to live, enjoy one another's company, and be in awe of this gift of life and all it comes with. Thank you in advance for your continued friendships, love, and prayers - our journey continues...