I've written and rewritten this intro a few times. What do I say? How do I say it? When is the "right" time? Answers that are all individualized, right? Yeah, well, here it goes...I have breast cancer.
Ugh, no one and I do mean NO ONE wants to ever hear the "C" word, especially in combination with "YOU." It's been surreal at best since October 17, when the radiologist, accompanied by the mammography tech, somberly stated, "I have a concern; you have a 2cm mass, an inflamed lymph node, as well as calcifications and I am recommending an immediate biopsy."
Gosh, okay, what do you say at that point? Thanks, doc?? I am awe-struck and completely numb; I could hear everything being said but my body was truly desensitized. My dear sweet Scott is riddled with absolute confusion and heart-ache...his beloved may very well have cancer.
So, it wasn't until October 20, when we officially found out that I have stage 2a, grade 2, invasive ductal carcinoma with at least one axillary lymph node infected. A later breast MRI revealed an additional area within the same breast, measuring 10 cm of what is called DCIS, ductal carcinoma in situ, a less invasive growing cancer.
I will continue to update my journey here. I am happy to talk to anyone with questions, concerns or even tried and true healing modalities. This is not a death sentence but merely a time for my family, friends, Scott and I all to grow. I'm staying as positive as I am able in facing this type of challenge. I am human so I'm not immune to grief, anger, frustration or any natural occurring emotion that comes with something like this. It's been a whirlwind already.
Thank you for taking time to join me on this journey, however it may be. I AM a fighter, it's my Schmoe nature and I WILL beat this fucking cancer (remember the anger emotion I mentioned...yeah, well, that's it at it's finest!) I will be kicking some ass...join me!