Adam H

First post: Aug 25, 2019
Children were never my thing. Then I met my husband. I quickly learned Children were the spark that brought him to life. He showed me the magic and the profound peace they illuminate. Then he showed me the blessings they bring to your life when we had our first and only child. It’s no surprise, really, he works at a school for children with special needs and learning differences - it’s his calling. He gives his entire life to the school. Many times, coming home a shell of a man with barely enough energy to eat and pass out. Sometimes I get jealous, or angry that he gives so much of himself to the school, leaving so little for his family. But he insist he’s doing God’s work and I know it’s true.Then in May when a mouth sore persistently bothered him I begged him to go to the doctor. He kept putting me off insisting things had to be done at school, he had to be there, the children and staff needed him. When the pain became too much mid-summer, he reluctantly took time off work to see a doctor. After an immediate biopsy we were told seven days later that he had squamous cell carcinoma in the lining of his cheek - (Buccal Mucosa) My husband is 48 and a non-smoker. The nightmare only got worse when after further tests were told it was a rare stage III tumor that had begun to spread into his jaw and lymph nodes. I couldn’t believe I was facing losing the love of my life, the father of my child and surrogate father to 126 special children. Thankfully, we were assured the cancer is treatable and possibly curable with a multi-stage approach. Being employed by a not-for-profit school, my husband barely makes enough peanuts to feed our family. Then two months ago I lost my job when my company shut down. The plan was to stay home over the summer with our son and look for a job as soon as he went back to school. (Mostly to avoid the summer camp extortion rates) Instead, over the next three months, I’ll be My Husband’s advocate and caregiver while he fights for his life through surgery, radiation and possibly Chemo therapy. I never wanted to turn to asking for money from friends family and strangers. It’s not us. Everything we own we bought ourselves, including our house. I searched our home high and low for everything that I could find of any value and posted it on posh Mark and Mercari and quickly learned after commission on sales, shipping and time spent, if I manage to cover a month of utilities I’d be lucky.We both have very little family, and our friends, like us, have very little to spare.Over the last three weeks I have lived in a horrible hell trying to figure out how to save my husband, protect our son, and keep our house. I am worn out and can’t figure out an answer to any of our problems. To make matters worse, I’ve lost hope. I can’t pay the bills, they are mounting too fast. I’m so scared and don’t know who to turn to. I promise we are very good people who give back selflessly and will find a way to pay your kindness forward. Hand on heart and bible I’m the girl that pays for the car behind me in drivethrus when we have the money to spare. I drive a crap car without air conditioning and still thank God for my blessing of a vehicle. We are not materialistic or better than anyone. We just need help so bad. Honestly, at this point, we need a miracle. According to our horrific market exchange insurance the surgery, medication, doctors and radiation will come close to $20,000. Then there are the on going radiation treatments due to the high recurrence of this type of cancer. I can’t stop crying, have lost 10 pounds in 3 weeks and yesterday a trip to the doctor revealed the stress and lack of eating had led to gastritis. I’m so lost... The truth is, anything will help because outside of each other, God, and a house we are barely holding on to, we have nothing. Thank you for your time and consideration, April