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EB -
I was stunned a while back to sit at a neighbor's dining table and learn that LouAnn had moved on.
And to find this site, just now, 3 years later, reviewing another Caringbridge site for another friend engaged in her own amazing dance with treatment and recovery.
I have memories and photographs, sharp as the moments they happened, tumbling through me now, in this late quiet night, of you. And LouAnn. I laugh out loud, and the tears burn my cheeks at such joy, such loss. So many days and nights, welcomed into your home. So many delicious meals, the bounty of your garden. Watching LouAnn create a magical space to create clay vessels in that impossibly cramped basement. You seeing, designing and drawing out forms in wood that - well, who knew wood could be coaxed like that? Both of you intensely involved in the whole spectrum of ways we walk through this world - shaping, lovingly, with your hands. Shaping, lovingly, with your hearts - open always to your friends and each other.
I close my eyes and smell the fresh cider pressed in your backyard - those absolutely perfect moments of friends together, bundled against the Minnesota briskness, laughing, playing, each taking home a gallon of fresh-pressed love with the taste of apples.
I remember painful moments, of uncertainty and fear, my being welcomed into your home, sleeping snugly in the amazing nest, so full of light and peace, transformed from a chilly attic by your skilled and knowing hands. The healing there will always be with me.
I cherish the week at White Wolf, can it be almost 20 years ago? Hiking and laughing, under the Sierra sun, under the Sierra stars, the bear and LouAnn's indignant (and effective!) bigger-and-badder-than-you response, who knew such noise could come from one person? Teasing Elena with the charcoal-enhanced bear paw print in her journal.
Here is a porcelain teapot, the cups long gone missing. Here the urn for Larry's ashes - tangible treasures made by LouAnn's hands. They are precious, but not nearly so much as the memories, the gifts of your friendship.
And you - we met at Ray's wedding, you & I the only ones dressed funny, how could I not be drawn to your joy, your strength, your wisdom?
I hope for you all that love and strength you've given so freely, for pain to ease, and joy to blossom as long as you walk this planet.
I thank you for lessons and laughter, remembered and forgotten, but never lost. For introducing me to LouAnn and opening your lives, hopes, and struggles to one still awed at such devotion, such affection.
And I hope someday our paths may cross again. Whether or not they do, you are in my heart and my dreams, and I wish you love in all you do.

Gary Wilson <gw@garywilson.name>
Quiringuicharo, Michoacan, Mexico - Thursday, November 27, 2008 1:38 AM CST

EB,
Our visit together was wonderful. Our love is with you as you continue to build your future on the rememberences of the past. LouAnn is always there to help as she was today.

Pete and Renda McCaughan <peteandrenda@yahoo.com>
Atlanta, GA USA - Sunday, November 19, 2006 8:48 AM CST

E.B.
It is good that this is ending.
New things will arise.
Love,
Richard
Richard Fuller <richardfuller@gaiavoices.net>
Saint Paul, MN United States - Sunday, September 3, 2006 9:22 PM CDT

Dear EB,
I just read your last entry, its so beautiful...you are a gifted writer. You write through an open heart, open to all who choose to hear. Beautiful!
Your words help me understand my own feelings better. Thank you for what you have given.
May the begining of school be playful and rewarding for you, I hope we may see each other soon one day, I would love to do art with you.

Love,
Pat Rouse <rouse004@umn.edu>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Friday, September 1, 2006 12:33 AM CDT

EB, what an inspiration you are, and what truly meaningfull work you have contributed to the world of caring and grieving. I am glad you came into my life and wish you well on your journey, it will be full of portages, butterflies, sunsets and sunrises of great beauty I am sure.
Sacred Fool(Ken Pyburn) <kenpyburn@yahoo.com>
Boise, ID USA - Wednesday, August 16, 2006 6:52 PM CDT

Hi EB, I'm struck by your stories about your trip in the Boundary Waters. I've always thought that sometimes people are closer to the spirit world than at other times. One of those times for me was during my pregnancy, and I also had some experiences of close connection to Spirit on a solo camping trip. And it seems like your trip was one of those times for you. I'm glad. Thanks for sharing your stories.

Ruby
Ruby Steigerwald <steigerbuss@msn.com>
Minneapolis, MN - Wednesday, August 16, 2006 1:26 PM CDT

wow E.B, what a series of wonderful experiences. it's kinda like you had to go through some rough weather to get to see and feel the great stuff!
I really enjoyed reading about the butterfly the most and i am so happy that you dreamt of LouAnn in that way. It sounds like she's hugging you still. and you're right by the way, many people, including LouAnn love you.
Ligeia :) <ligeiasmith@hotmail.com>
Toronto, on Canada - Wednesday, August 16, 2006 8:42 AM CDT

Dear EB - The piece on memorial gardens in the Strib was lovely -- thank you for agreeing to be featured. It was such a pleasure to see you and the beautiful spaces you have created with and for Lou Ann - right there in print for the whole world to see. Thank you for opening your heart and home in all the ways that you have. Your sharing has made my life more rich.
Carolyn Carr
- Tuesday, August 15, 2006 11:40 PM CDT

Elizabeth,

I was deeply touched by meeting with you recently. If only I had tried earlier to get back in touch with Lou Ann, who had been my truest friend for many years.

Her presence in my life had been a blessing. She was a person of intelligence, integrity, strength, humor, sensitivity -- and spunk. In her personal and professional life, tragically brief though it was, I am glad she found the love, joy, knowledge, and path she had been searching for. Having known her since I was eight, I felt proud of her, too.

I know you will always feel her presence in your life, and I wish the same for the rest of us whose lives she graced.

Jane M.

Jane <sylvia4310@cox.net>
Providence, RI - Tuesday, August 1, 2006 12:57 AM CDT

EB,
I appreciated the comment you made in one of your entries about death being analagous to birth and far from being a one time event is really just a port of entry into an ever-changing relationship. I am reminded by you how the love we give and receive on any single moment continue to be available and retrieved through memory.

THanks for welcoming us all into your home on the 23rd. Blessings be. Annika

Annika Fjelstad <fjel0001@umn.edu>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Sunday, July 30, 2006 4:25 PM CDT

elizabeth,
i was happy to read your account of sunday. one thing that struck me in particular was your realization that LouAnn, among many things, will be remembered for the love that both of you shared. I could not have put that better myself. I remember seeing you two interact at grandma's house in the living room, for example, when i was a child and teen. It struck me how much you two loved each other. There was never a moment that you weren't massaging her back or she yours. Or even something simple as a hand on the shoulder, but always showing love for one another. This came as a surprise to me as a child because no other couple in the family ever did that, not even my own parents. When you have asked for memories of LouAnn, it's been hard to think of memories of just her alone. They always seem to include you, to the point where sometimes i find myself questioning whether the memory was of LouAnn or of you.
Now that I am an adult, I am able to look back at my memories of your interactions and say, "that's what i want". Such a great role model the two of you were/are.

Ligeia :)
Toronto, ON Canada - Thursday, July 27, 2006 3:12 PM CDT

E.B., I am so glad to hear that you are gradually healing from your loss. You sound happier and able to enjoy life again, at least at times. This is very hard work and takes a lot of time. I want to write you one last time and let you know that I am still available to get together, talk, or whatever. I am one of the two partnered women you and Lou Ann met at a performance at the Ordway. Our mutual friend, Wendy, had given us all tickets. Months later, we ran into you on the street in St. Paul and said hello. You were on your way to a concert with a friend. One thing we have in common is our love of music. Another thing we have in common is the loss of a spouse/partner through death. Also, I was a psychotherapist for over twenty years and one of my specializations was grief counseling. I am not offering you counseling, just a caring ear. I have come to know you as much as you've revealed yourself through this journal, and one can't help but care.

I didn't try to contact you earlier because at the time I last read this journal, you seemed to need most to be with people who knew and were also grieving Lou Ann, and I couldn't offer you that. But from my own experience, I knew there would come a time when some of your support would fall off, and you have said that has happened some, although you still have many caring supportive people around you. Also, you have talked about how our culture has difficulty talking about death. That may be true, but my experience is that even more than that, so many people (in general, men, Scandinavians and some other ethnic groups, conservative Christians, people who grew up with an alcoholic parent or something else the family had trouble dealing with, etc., etc.)have trouble being with people in their pain. So many people find it very hard to just be with someone and empathically and caringly listen. This is, I think, partly just a normal part of human survival mechanisms, but so many people just haven't been shown or taught how to do it. They want to "help" by fixing it and making it better, but with grief, what helps the most is acknowledging and honoring it and allowing it to pass through us. If we do that, the times of active grieving become gradually less frequent and less intense. Anyway, the only reason I'm saying all of this is to let you know that I am pretty good at being with people while they are in pain, so I could be another source of support to you. Also, I think it would be great getting to know you. My partner, Linda, would enjoy that too. So, please feel free to call me at 952-906-3089. If you are not comfortable doing that, that is fine. I just wanted to offer. Both Linda and I wish you a rich and fulfilled rest of your life. Thank you for sharing so much through this journal.
Cathleen Fields
Minnetonka, MN USA - Tuesday, July 25, 2006 11:41 AM CDT

Hi E.B.,
We thought of you yesterday, although weren't able to make it to the open house. I hope it was all that it needed to be. I would've liked to have seen your garden and hammock. Much love and healing and prayer to you as you mark this anniversary. I keep seeing that smiling, lovely photo of Lou Ann with the crown as I think of you two.

Jenny Larson
Minneapolis, MN - Monday, July 24, 2006 8:25 PM CDT

Dear E.B.:

Since we talked on Friday night, many more memories of Lou Ann have surfaced for me. I decided to record the memory I shared with you so you will have it in your book for the future.

When you and Lou Ann decided to start eating macrobiotic, we at Northland were intrigued. We soon found out that what it meant was Lou Ann eating unusual looking items with hard to pronounce names. We were polite in that combination of therapist plus Minnesotan way but I know that I, for one, really wanted to taste it all.

We decided to have an overnight retreat for the whole staff and one of our team invited us to a house she had outside the Cities. As we were planning the details, Lou Ann piped up and offered to cook us a macrobiotic meal. I remember that the initial response was complete silence! Then one by one, we became interested and then enthusiatic. What we didn't know was what Lou Ann offered was a labor of love.

What I remember about the meal prep is that Lou Ann was totally organized (no surprise) and had all the ingredients laid out on the counters. Several of us were sous chefs and it seemed like the prep took most of the afternon or maybe all of the afternoon. Lou Ann had chosen many, many different recipes that complimented each other.

When it was finally (and I do mean finally) time to eat, Lou Ann looked like a mother hen who had just given birth to a perfect brood of chicks. She beemed. We began tentatively sampling, chattering, offering our impressions as Lou Ann sat back, relaxed and soaked in the well-deserved praise.

It was a time I will never forget and I am so grateful to Lou Ann for creating those moments.
Jane Levin
Edina, MN USA - Monday, July 24, 2006 10:57 AM CDT

I saw a sign in a garden that read "Save some space for dancing angels", and I thought about your garden and your reference to you and Louann dancing together. I am sure your garden is full of dancing angels, or sprites, or fairies.

May peace be within your grasp as dawn arrives tomorrow.

- Sue Cairn
Sue Cairn <scairn@verizon.net>
Amherst, MA US - Saturday, July 22, 2006 2:26 PM CDT

Dear Elizabeth,

Thank you, for thinking of us by sending the note and invitation.

Although my contacts with Lou Ann were infrequent over the years, (once or twice a year during childhood for Passover and summer vacations and less frequent in adulthood), I always felt a caring spirit and warmth emanating from Lou Ann. These feelings are impressed upon my fond memories of Lou Ann and our family�s events.

Our thoughts and prayers are with you.

Cousins Steve and Holly Schotz <steveholly@comcast.net>
Clarksville, Maryland - Saturday, July 22, 2006 2:07 PM CDT

I want to follow up on Mary Ellen's comment about continued sharing. This site has been a beautiful thing. I don't generally read blogs, but I might read yours. You know that Liz O and Paul L each have one?
See you at the anniversary Sunday afternoon, after the Fellowship Committee meeting.
Richard
Richard Fuller <richardfuller@gaiavoices.net>
Saint Paul, MN United States - Thursday, July 20, 2006 9:13 AM CDT

EB, as you prepare to close this CaringBridge site down, I hope you can continue to share your experiences with those of us who have been touched and guided by your witness on this site. You write very movingly and honestly about your experiences, from the powerful, life-changing times of loss and grief, to the minute and dear moments of gardening and grandmothering. Perhaps a blog on a different site could be a way to continue to share your growth and wisdom, as well as a place to share ongoing memories and experiences of Lou Ann. In any case, I have enjoyed and have been moved by your account of this difficult journey of loss and grief and recovered abundance. Thank you, my dear.
Mary Ellen <shawx001@umn.edu>
- Sunday, July 16, 2006 8:58 PM CDT

Elizabeth,

The word that comes to mind when I read your most recent entry is "Grace." You have been broken open so many times in the past year, year and a half, and each of those times, God has come to you in some way and shown you a bit of grace. At least, that's how I come to make sense out of it all. And isn't it amazing grace when strangers on a plane share so completely an experience that society trains us to avoid? WoW. Good for you for being open.

May God's Light and Love continue to heal you.

Blessings,
Liz Oppenheimer
Minneapolis, MN USA - Monday, July 10, 2006 10:37 PM CDT

EB:
What a tribute to Lou Ann that you have maintained on this site. It sure seems to be a fabulous way for you to journey through your evolving life. I look forward to seeing you on 7/23. Much love, Velma
Velma Wagner
Minneapolis, MN - Monday, July 10, 2006 9:32 PM CDT

EB,

I am so glad you put the address for Lou Ann's caring bridge entries in the meeting Query handout. What a moving, open, and connecting way to walk through your grief and your life with and without Lou Ann.

Thank you for sharing your journey, tears, laughter and emptiness as well as your continued path through it all. I found it very profoundly healing and an offering to allow for my own process through things. Your Death Valley journey was wonderful!

I had tried to find your caringbridge comments about your Death Valley trip - after the conversation we had before and after the movie we went to see. I found that I didn't book mark it and my life had just a strange twist for me afterwards that I lost track of time and getting back with you. I so much enjoyed that time with you that day we went to the movies - thank you for asking.

I am still interested in having the rest of the conversation now that I have read your journal entries - when you are willing.

Much love and healing thoughts to you, EB.
Chante

Chante Wolf <chantewolf7@hotmail.com>
St. Anthony, MN United States - Sunday, July 9, 2006 10:53 AM CDT

Hi EB,
I'm still reading, and I'm grateful for your words here and for you. I'm so aware of the movement of this year, as Grace is now 13 months and is taking proud steps, more and more each day. I'm thinking of you as you retrace these coming weeks. Many blessings to you.
Jenny Larson
Minneapolis, - Saturday, July 8, 2006 4:05 PM CDT

EB,
I feel such profound gratitude for your sharing of your journey on this website. I didn't know Lou Ann in her lifetime, but you have given me a glimpse of her here. Thank you for that, and for your honesty and tenderness with yourself and with your readers. I continue to hold you in my heart.

Peace be with you,
Sarah
Sarah Marquardt
Minneapolis, MN United States - Wednesday, June 28, 2006 11:21 AM CDT

Dear Elizabeth,
your gardening experiences sound wonderful and perhaps healing as well. wow and all those deer! how wonderful you get to see them and even approach them! the abundance topic gives me something to think about. my thoughts are with you during this difficult time.
ligeia
toronto, canada - Monday, June 26, 2006 4:11 PM CDT

Dear Elizabeth - I'm leaving for Toronto on business for a few days. Life has been hectic w/lots of deadlines, lately. I'm so glad you left notice about this site ending -- reading it gives me a sense of peace about LouAnn and that you, in your grief, are doing well. Helps put many things in perspective.
I wish I would be in MN on July 23rd - my thoughts and prayers will be with you as I join my family in Michigan for our annual lakeside get-together.
I love that you are in your garden! Say hello to Elena & Bill when you visit.
much love,
Janet
Janet Wigfield <jwigmc2@aol.com>
Bronxville, NY USA - Wednesday, June 21, 2006 7:22 AM CDT

Hi EB
I've been thinking of you many times as I garden-- observing the pea growth--hey, those aren't sugar snap as the package promised, harvesting and replanting greens, investigating what's putting holes in the beans, and doing other various yard tasks, I imagine you too are up a tree or doing similar tasks in your own yard. And now your journal verifies this. Cultivation and weeding is good for the shoulders, forearms, (and other muscles we discover the next day) and of course the spirit too.
Sending love to you,
Judy F.
judy <judy.fairbrother@darts1.org>
- Monday, June 19, 2006 3:36 PM CDT

E.B,
I'm with you.

Love,
Richard
Richard Fuller <richardfuller@gaiavoices.net>
Saint Paul, MN United States - Monday, June 19, 2006 10:55 AM CDT

Dear EB,
I haven't checked in since shortly after LouAnn died, had no idea you were still writing. Such a beautiful and honest testimony of love... thank you for letting us in on your inner life and grief.
Love,
Mary Ann
Mary Ann Crolley <maryanncrolley@hotmail.com>
- Thursday, June 15, 2006 5:32 PM CDT

Elizabeth,

Thanks for the heads-up email about this webpage coming to a close... I have been traveling of late and will be doing so again very soon.

Your stories, memories, and comments here are so beautiful and tender, like the butterflies you mention: broken but not dead, yet nature will have her way, and so many of us can only watch and bear witness.

Reading through some of the comments here in the guestbook, I can tell you and Lou Ann have touched a great many lives, and isn't that marvelous?

I hope to make it to your open house. In the meantime, whether I am in town or on the road, I continue to carry you in my heart.

Blessings,
Liz Oppenheimer
Minneapolis, MN - Monday, June 12, 2006 8:49 PM CDT

EB
Thansks for being so open about your process. This blog did so many things for all of us. We were able to stay informed, connected to you and to others. Boston is finally sunny, the rain stopped, streams and rivers are returning to their normal non-pregnat state, and it hurts less when I think of Lou.

b.
Barb Dieckman <bdieckman@tufts-nemc.org>
Warner, NH - Monday, June 12, 2006 9:08 AM CDT

EB,
I think of you out in Death Valley, wide-brimmed hat, bright tights, laughing and crying. I think of your 60th Birthday cake out there which we all enjoyed. I think of your stories of the loss of your love, and the gifts you gave( and give) in the sharing. So the seasons turn, taking you with them deeper into life. Thanks for all I learned from meeting you, and I wish you well as the next round of the wheel begins turning...
Love,
Sara
Sara Harris <sarajharris@comcast.net>
Forestville, CA usa - Sunday, June 11, 2006 10:20 PM CDT

Hello dear friend, Elizabeth. Can it be a year since LouAnn's death?! What an incredible year for you! Sometimes my heart is so heavy at the thought of her death and sometimes my heart lifts when I think of her. Maybe it will always be that way.
Mary Evans <marylevans@mac.com>
Newport , MN - Sunday, June 11, 2006 5:09 PM CDT

Dear EB...

The seasons have turned 4 times. The wheel of life inevitably brings the anniversary. It is a good time to pause, reflect, honor. The spinning of the shields will continue as it must. Climb aboard as never before EB. Take Lou Ann with you (it cannot be otherwise). Stare into the desert, then open the door and stride boldly into your life. The Grandmothers walk with you.

Love ... Scout
Scout Tomyris <scout@becomingsage.com>
Santa Rosa, CA United States - Saturday, June 10, 2006 1:30 PM CDT

Hi Elizabeth -- Thanks for sending me the invitation and the information. I read lots of your entries -- especially the ones around her death. The things you wrote are beautiful. I would like to come to your open house if possible. Meanwhile I'm gone to CO a lot -- decided to wait until fall to come back to the Judith group. Take care of yourself. Alis
Alis Olsen
St Paul, MN USA - Saturday, June 10, 2006 11:21 AM CDT

EB, mindy and i agree with what Cathy said. That seems to be a very plausible connection. i know i am the same way with all sorts of things. i find myself saying things like, "this time last year, i ....". Do you also feel LouAnn's presence more as well? Is she around you? Does she visit you more often?
i most certainly am in no position to be able to offer you advice on this. i am afraid anything i might offer would sound trite, but is there something that you learned in the grieving seminar that may help you? have you been back in contact with friends that knew both of you?
please know that mindy and i think of you often and i am still holding you in the light.

Ligeia and Mindy
- Saturday, June 10, 2006 8:24 AM CDT

Hola Elizabeth:
Soy yo Juan. I am so glad to hear from you. I just wanted to let you know that I think about you. I would love to go to your open house on July. I can bring "arepas" if you want. Big hug to you and my best wishes.

Tu amigo Juan.
Juan Figueroa <el_alcaravan2009@yahoo.com>
Saint Paul , MN USA - Friday, June 9, 2006 8:46 PM CDT

Big Hug.
Richard Fuller <richardfuller@gaiavoices.net>
Saint Paul, MN United States - Wednesday, May 24, 2006 8:06 PM CDT

Hi E.B.,

It is wonderful read your recent postings! They are filled with hope, an embrace of spring, new life, and the willingness to risk that comes with (as you say) having your heart broken open. While I hope to see you today at CTT, I wanted to send you a virtual hug here, as well. Happy Spring. Elizabeth
Elizabeth Hutchins
Northfield, MN USA - Saturday, May 20, 2006 7:46 AM CDT

Elizabeth,
I just wanted to let you know that I am thinking of you and still check the journal. I am so moved by it and your writing. I wish there were other ways I could show my support and caring for you and Lou Ann. Any ideas, just let me know. Karen
Karen Harris <Karenharrismn@hotmail.com>
San Diego, CA - Thursday, May 11, 2006 10:45 PM CDT

So nice to read another posting from you, thank you - and nice to see you at a distance in all the hubbub of the Mayday Parade.... Enjoy that aerie :)

Take care --
Carolyn Carr <carolynecarr@hotmail.com>
, - Thursday, May 11, 2006 1:32 AM CDT

Hi, E.B.,

Just checked in to the Caringbridge page after my retreat. Lovely posting from last Wednesday. Mark focused on Patience for this 3 day retreat. It was a powerful, difficult and wonderful time. I thought of you several times. Just wanted to say "hi". Touch base when you can.....

With Metta and Patience (as best I can),

Love,
Jymme
- Monday, May 1, 2006 1:02 PM CDT

Hi from New York, EB -
It's been too long since I've written - and I'm grateful for your call in writing today for thoughts and prayers surrounding this bittersweet time of such a great beginning. I remember when I met you two. You'd been together about 5 years - and I'd been w/my then-partner (Deb in case your memory fails you) for about 3 or so and you were so pleased to meet another lesbian couple in a "long-term relationship." You made it really long-term, and you were so fortunate to find the right one to be with all those years. I so keenly recall how LouAnn would shake her head and smile lovingly at you, even if a bit irritated, because she was so clearly and so dearly in love with you ALL the time. What sweet gazes you gave each other. Yours will always stand as a statement about what a loving partnership can be. In living it, you gave a gift to everyone who knew you -- in addition to each other.
I will be in MN April 28 - May 2 to celebrate my parents' 80th birthday and would love to be able to stop by and give you some warm hugs. If you read this, please write to me at jwigmc2@aol.com and let me know if you're around on April 30 or May 1.
All my love,
Janet
Janet Wigfield <jwigmc2@aol.com>
Bronxville, NY - Tuesday, April 18, 2006 9:08 PM CDT

A note from Amherst, MA to let you know that the yellow forsythia are indeed in bloom here, beautiful as ever. I hope our love and support reaches across the miles to wrap you in a warm embrace today.

Love,

Sue and Rich Cairn
Sue Cairn <scairn@verizon.net>
- Monday, April 17, 2006 8:46 AM CDT

Just to let you know that I'm still reading this, and am grateful for it.

And for you.
Paul L
Minneapolis, MN 5540 - Sunday, April 16, 2006 11:47 PM CDT

�elf-nurturance�!
Yes!
Elves, as we humans have come to understand them, I believe,
are like us, except in some interesting ways.
* Not so concerned with rationality
* Consistently connected to the outdoors
* Like surprises, especially when they are the ones doing the surprising,
* Think the best surprises are a bit shocking
* Live for many human lifetimes, like our souls

Elf-nurturance!
Clearly a good thing!
Love,
Richard
Richard Fuller <richardfuller@gaiavoices.net>
Saint Paul, MN United States - Saturday, April 15, 2006 5:28 PM CDT

So would it kill you to put the dough into a pan?

There's a metaphor there somewhere, maybe, having to do with the way we just splat and spread all over if we don't have some structure, some framework to hold us up.

And there's one, too, with the sourdough thing, how the starter can trace its lineage back to who-knows-when. I once ate a piece that the baker said came to San Francisco during the Gold Rush in 1849 and had been kept alive & growing ever since. I liked thinking at the moment that Mark Twain or Jack London may have eaten bread from the same batch.

I don't know, but your story made me laugh and I know you'll get the hang of it soon.
Paul Landskroener <paulmb@state.net>
- Friday, April 7, 2006 10:45 PM CDT

Hi EB,
Thanks for these messages about your recent reliving of Lou Ann's year, thanks to the IRS, and your several bread-baking adventures. I hope the retracing is healing -- and that the bread keeps tasting good - no matter what it looks like.

Nice to catch a glimpse of you again today at meeting. I'd love to hear about the birds you see from your hammock - you are in such a great spot for good birding! For a couple of days last week, while I've been out walking with Sylvia in the neighborhood, twice I saw a Northern Harrier, big and dark, with long wings and a long tail, swooping around the sky over our block....
Carolyn Carr <carolynecarr@hotmail.com>
Minneapolis, MN - Sunday, April 2, 2006 11:08 PM CDT

Hi E.B.,

Greetings from the beautiful Arizona desert. Not as beautiful as last year this time because of the lack of rain this year but lovely in a different way. I enjoyed the continuation of the bread stories. Good grief. Who knew all the possible ways things could go wrong? Don't answer that please, either in bread baking or in life. But I'm glad you recognize all the ways they go right, too. I'll look forward to seeing you after I get back later in the week. Probably no more chance of snowshoeing but I'll look forward to walking, biking,... who knows.

With love,
Jymme
- Sunday, April 2, 2006 2:08 PM CDT

Elizabeth,
Maybe that soup feeds more than one.
blessings,
maria
maria kaefer
berkeley, ca - Thursday, March 23, 2006 0:32 AM CST

Elizabeth,
We are specks, flickering on the surface of the ocean of life.
You are shining bright!
> happy! I keep learning about doing things in a relaxed way, not using more
> energy than is required, letting things flow naturally. For me, this is life
> work.
I learn, hearing you, what I already know, but stronger for your saying it.
We are all dead in the end.
That's not the point.
How do we live?
You are living beautifully,
And expanding my life.
Love,
Richard
richard Fuller <richardfuller@gaiavoices.net>
Saint Paul, MN United States - Wednesday, March 15, 2006 7:23 PM CST

Hello EB,

Thanks for continuing to share your story. It is a gift to your community to share this journey. I'm glad you can imagine the possibility of joy. That's big. Celebrate that for what it is. I'm sure these anniversaries of the beginning of LouAnn's illness continue to compound. Take care,
Annika Fjelstad <fjel0001@umn.edu>
MInneapolis, MN - Saturday, March 11, 2006 10:02 PM CST

Dear EB,

Thanks for your writing and heart. I was checking caringbridge regarding a friend who is in the hospital and thought to see if LouAnn's site was still there. Voila. Know that I send you energy and think of LouAnn. I am in my own season of yahrzeits these days. My prayer list keeps getting longer. Take care.
Rachel Lipkin
- Saturday, March 11, 2006 6:42 AM CST

Hi EB,

Thanks for the final tale from your Death Valley Days... It was so nice to see you at Ann's for her dad's shiva. Please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers as all the momentous 1 year anniversaries take place. Peace be with you. Love, Carolyn
Carolyn Carr <carolynecarr@hotmail.com>
- Friday, March 10, 2006 0:29 AM CST

Hi EB, I was going to send you an email but didn't know if you still use the lewis109 address. In my typical slow way I've just now read the first of your Death Valley entries. I'm so hapy that there are a lot of them, that I know I can dip into that stream of your experience again.

In that first entry you talked about the idea of what you are willing to surrender. I don't think that was your word, what you were willing to die to? This has really got me thinking. My dearest friends here in Minneapolis, the Cairns, are leaving, and it's shaken me up. I haven't made deep connections with very many people here, I've made assumptions about the Cairns always being around, there are some ways I'm not living my life the way I want to.

What am I willing to let go of in order to change? hmm.

I'm sorry you're sad and missing Lou Ann. That's all I can think of to say right now.

From Ruby
Ruby Steigerwald <steigerbuss@msn.com>
Minneapolis, MN US - Wednesday, March 1, 2006 4:22 PM CST

Hello Lizbeth,
I just want to let you know I found your Caring Bridge website. I will take time to visit longer another time, but I want you to know I care and am thankful for the sharing at Maggie and Linda's party. Be gentle with yourself. Deep peace to your heart. Gentle strength to your spirit.
Diane Dobiz
Diane Dobiz
- Sunday, February 26, 2006 8:40 PM CST

EB -- Six months is a critical point: half-way around the orbit, the farthest in the cycle you'll ever be from the darkest day, and there are two choices: surrender to centrifugal force, sever the cord, and let yourself hurtle through space to eternity; or stay in the orbit, stay connected to the source in the center, and let yourself be brought back to that day you never want to face. . . .

I hope you understand -- and feel -- how much we love you.
Paul Landskroener <paulmb@state.net>
Minneapolis, - Tuesday, February 14, 2006 4:11 PM CST

Hi EB,
I continue to be a regular reader of your journal. Wow, a year since this all began. I am holding you in the light and thinking of you often.
Blessings to you.
Jenny Larson
Minneapolis, - Sunday, February 12, 2006 7:40 AM CST

Dear EB,

Thank you again for your postings -- I so appreciate learning what's unfolding for you. I'm so rarely with you in person, but please know that I continue to hold you in the Light.
Love, Carolyn
Carolyn Carr <carolynecarr@hotmail.com>
Minneapolis, MN US - Saturday, February 4, 2006 9:04 PM CST

Hello, Elizabeth
Yesterday was indeed a dark day, in spite of flickerings of sunlight. I hope today is a little better for you�perhaps a trip to the co-op for good food and wacky company? Anyway, just wanted you to know I'm thinking of you.

Naomi Jackson <naomijx@juno.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Tuesday, January 24, 2006 10:51 AM CST

My Dear Sister,
I am both humbled and inspired.
Much Love, Dorothy
Dorothy Helfrick <dhelfrick@snet.net>
East Hartford, CT - Monday, January 23, 2006 4:48 PM CST

Dear EB,

Thank you so much for these postings. I think about you often. I saw you at a distance briefly at meeting today, and I am so glad to have your writing here as a glimpse into what's unfolding for you. Your reference to grief surrounding you like a mourning cloak of course conjured up the butterfly you saw also named a mourning cloak. And that can't help but make me think of metamorphosis as a metaphor for the grieving process. While there seem to be so very many things wrong with the metaphor (I won't elaborate...), at least one thing seems right to me -- that grief is one of the forces in life that rearranges one's soul, in an extraordinary transformation. Thank you for sharing your experiences.
Carolyn Carr <carolynecarr@hotmail.com>
Minneapolis, MN - Sunday, January 22, 2006 9:05 PM CST

Hi E.B.

What a coincidence...one of my patients just gave me "Peace Like a River"....I offered to give it back when I was done but she insisted I keep it, saying she was sure I'd have someone to pass it on to. I'll start with the next-to-the-last chapter.

Your journals are a joy to read. You have such a rich mix of clear sight, precision of expression and this brave curiosity to figure out what's true....and not a speck of insistence that the world conform to your schema.

Thanks for reminding me at meeting that this is an ongoing site. Reading you feels like today's gift from the universe. Thanks. (I've also developed a fondness for tarantulas that is new for me.) Love, Bridget
Bridget Fensholt <bfensholt@comcast.net>
South St. Paul, MN USA - Monday, January 9, 2006 10:15 PM CST

E.B. Thanks you for sharing your ongoing revelations in this Journal. I do check-in and read the journal and guestbook weekly, (Though I have not felt my voice strong enough to add it to the mix).

From your most current entries, it seems that your recent trips have provided important experiences and insight for your journey. I hope your path continues to be well lit.
Angela Davis <angel_dvs@yahoo.com>
St. Paul, Minnesota - Friday, January 6, 2006 9:24 AM CST

Elizabeth,
Thank you for writing your story of your time in the desert.
I think it is easier for me to take in writing.
I notice you are signing yourself Elizabeth.
(looking back, I see you have been doing that since June) Would you like me to use that name when I speak to you? I could try to change my habit.
Richard Fuller <richardfuller@gaiavoices.net>
Saint Paul, MN United States - Wednesday, January 4, 2006 12:40 AM CST

E.B., I don't recall now what it was that reminded me to catch up on my reading of your website, but I'm glad I did!

Thank you for sharing what you can of your mystical, transformative, healing experience at Death Valley. Reading your posts, it seems as if the whole thing formed a gestalt, in which the individual pieces--the specific talking points, the specific encounters with critters, the specific awarenesses--don't and can't encapsulate what the whole experience actually was for you.

Still, I'm glad Julia A (was that who it was?) mentioned this adventure to you: it seems as if you were well led and are still harvesting the fruits of the experience.

Thanks for continuing to be in touch, for making the journeys from Here to There, with and without family, during the holidays and during the days in-between.

Blessings,
Liz Oppenheimer
Minneapolis, MN - Monday, January 2, 2006 9:35 AM CST

Hello EB, I still can't get over not writing to EB and Lou Ann. When will that fade, I wonder? Happy New Year sounds trite. How about Peaceful New Year? Meaningful New Year. Blessed New Year. Realistic New Year. Ah yes, Happy New Year too
Mary Evans <marylevans@mac.com>
- Saturday, December 31, 2005 11:45 PM CST

Dear EB,

Thank you for sharing your desert experiences here. I was so glad to see you at the coffee shop so unexpectedly, just after you returned. I would have liked to have had a more full and focused conversation then, but those kinds of moments are very rare when following around a 1 year old, so I'm especially glad to read these entries. I'm thinking of you. Love, Carolyn
Carolyn Carr <carolynecarr@hotmail.com>
Minneapolis, MN - Thursday, December 29, 2005 10:19 PM CST

Happy Solstice, Happy Christmas, Happy Hannukah, Happy New Year, Happy Kwanza, Happy Birthday E.B.!

I feel happy for you reading your desert journey�it seems to me to be exactly what you needed. Even your writing about it seems more connected to who I know you to be, like you�re more in touch with yourself. I hope you have had a lovely holiday celebration and continue to find ways to explore and process where this journey of your 60th year will take you.

Wendy <wendyl@visi.com>
- Friday, December 23, 2005 4:36 PM CST

Hi EB -- So good to hear of your visit to the desert. Sounds like a time of healing for you. It always amazes me how the non-human natural world contains such spiritual power and love.

Belated Happy Birthday. I think of you often... wishing you the best.
Take care.
Have an '06 full of grace. I hope to see you then.

Barb

Barb Strandell <bkstrandell@msn.com>
- Wednesday, December 21, 2005 10:05 AM CST

EB-thanks for the desert stories. I look forward to more of them. Love, Marilyn Myo-O
Marilyn Myo-O Habermas-Scher <ryugin@visi.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Wednesday, December 21, 2005 9:30 AM CST

Good to see you at Meeting yesterday. I am awed by your journey out west, and how you have been able to translate pieces of it into mere words for the rest of us. I am especially intrigued by the symbolic meaning you discovered in the animals you encountered. I continue to hold you in my heart and in the light.

- Sue
Sue Cairn <scairn@ties2.net>
Mpls, - Monday, December 19, 2005 5:02 PM CST

E.B.,

I'm grateful to read some of your experience in the desert, and I look forward to hearing more. I appreciate the terms death-life and life-death. Most of my life I've had the privilege of not being that close to death. This past year, I facilitated some meetings between people who've killed someone, and parents of murdered children. In those experiences, life and death have both been much more intimate than I'm used to. To be in that vulnerable place and be both open and grounded is something I both drawn to and resist.

Thanks for sharing some of your journey with us.

Michael

Michael Bischoff
- Sunday, December 18, 2005 9:06 AM CST

Happy belated Birthday, E.B. And thank you for continuing this journal. Sounds like you had an amazing, releasing time in the desert. I'd very much like to hear more--and I'm curious about the significance of the tarantula. I had a few encounters with tarantulas myself when I was a child--we lived in Tucson when I was in kindegarten. They are intriguing creatures. Blessings to you in this time of winter solstace.
Jenny Larson
Minneapolis, - Sunday, December 18, 2005 8:26 AM CST

What lies ahead is a range of possible events.
With each step
each year
A few of those possibilities manifest.
And the others are gone.
Gone.
Ageing/Growing as dying...
I can relate!
We choose. We cope.
We manifest.
That's what incarnation is about.
I think.

Richard
Richard Fuller <richardfuller@gaiavoices.net>
Saint Paul, MN United States - Monday, December 12, 2005 4:37 PM CST

Dear E.B.,

I've been thinking of you on a daily basis, trying to imagine what you might be doing at that particular moment when you are in my thoughts. I hope you are getting much from this trip and finding your load (literally and figuratively) is not too much to bear. I wish for you a greater sense of ease with it all as you continue this journey both in the desert and upon your return home. I can't wait to join you in acknowledging (Your friends will celebrate, you don't have to.) this birthday when you get back. I look forward to your stories and insights from this trip.

Thanks for your message on my CB page.

Sending you thoughts of peace and love,
Jymme
- Wednesday, December 7, 2005 9:39 AM CST

Dear EB,
Just want you to know I'm thinking of you, as you get ready to head to the desert tomorrow for your retreat. Peace be with you, as you live with the memories and sense of Lou Ann's presence, while you are under the stars, surrounded by the mountains.

Love - Carolyn
Carolyn Carr <carolynecarr@hotmail.com>
Mpls, MN - Friday, December 2, 2005 9:41 PM CST

I have read your entries while eating Spicy Thai noodles- unfortunately not the exquisite homemade Thai meal I had at your house! And today, I remember being at your house and Lou Ann announcing she was going to go watch the "old" Ellen Ge Dengeneres show. It pleases me to think of her enjoying that show. You are so often in my thoughts and prayers. I've been sick on and off all fall, so haven't seen you. I love your writings and quotes. I am relieved you are going away for the holidays and excited about your Vision Quest. All of our love and prayers follow you no matter where you go.
Lynne Holman <Lynneholman@cs.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Wednesday, November 16, 2005 5:26 PM CST

Elizabeth, what a treat to have you stop by Kate & Gillian's home on Saturday night and play "Why Did the Chicken...?!" And now I am hoping that the chaos in my own life (remodeling) lightens enough that I can stop by your open house tomorrow night. ...I continue to appreciate the tender writings you share here. I am a strong believer in making ourselves vulnerable to one another as we knit ourselves to each other's hearts in this Blessed Community.

Blessings, Liz
Liz Oppenheimer
Minneapolis, - Tuesday, November 8, 2005 6:09 PM CST

E.B.,
It was great to walk with you on that gorgeous day we had Wednesday. What a gift; the day, the walk, and most of all the talk and your good company. I hadn't read your latest update yet then, so glad to find it here now. What rich and lush thoughts you've shared about loss and love. Thanks for continuing to share this painfully intimate time in your life. It enriches mine each time. I'm glad you are figuring out these ways of taking good care of yourself. I hope there are still a few golden leaves surrounding you in your hammock. See you soon. Love, Jymme
Jymme
- Friday, November 4, 2005 12:21 AM CST

Hi EB,

I think of you often...picturing you up in your hammock on these beautiful late fall days. I loved your description of your shadow box. Kira started to make one at a Day of the Dead festival at Heart of the Beast, but instead turned it into a two story townhouse for her dolls. Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers,

Sue Cairn
- Friday, November 4, 2005 7:09 AM CST

Dear EB -- I look at this page almost daily. I'm awed at what you're going through, and the transparent way you're doing it. You are giving me a great lesson in how to move through great pain in a whole and loving way.

You and LouAnn are in my thoughts daily.
Rebecca Knittle
Saint Paul, MN - Tuesday, November 1, 2005 11:04 PM CST

Hi EB,

It was good to see you yesterday at Meeting. Thanks for your writing--I check your site often and think of you often. Are you still spending time in your hammock now that it's getting a little colder? We're just back from trick-or-treating. It's a beautiful night out. Last year Isaiah forgot all about candy the next day, but this year he'll probably remember.

Blessings to you,
Jenny
Jenny Larson
Minneapolis, MN - Monday, October 31, 2005 7:16 PM CST

Hi EB,
I have not known you long, but you and Lou Ann both touched me and I feel for your loss. Glad to hear you are finding ways to heal.
Karen Davis <davis136@tc.umn.edu>
- Monday, October 31, 2005 9:33 AM CST

Hey Sweetie,

Just stopped in to see what you may have been writing here of late. It was so good to read the Tolle quotes that you had read to me over the phone. Thanks for putting them here. You are such an incredible example to me of staying present and being open with people in your life through the most difficult times and seeing all the blessings that come from that. Thanks, E.B. I hope I can come close to your example but know that you continue to inspire and show the path. I will be thinking of you this weekend imagining you, Sonny and Pat biking through the crisp autumnn air. I'll be there in spirit. Hope it doesn't snow on you but even if it does I know you'll have a beautiful peaceful weekend. I'll look forward to talking when you get back. Much love, Jymme
Jymme Golden
- Friday, October 21, 2005 8:11 AM CDT

Dear EB,

Hmmmm.. You know, it's hard to find words right now. I have just read your entry with Tolle's quotes, and it brings me to tears. These are tears of sadness and happiness all rolling down together. Thank you.

Love - Carolyn
Carolyn Carr <carolynecarr@hotmail.com>
Minneapolis, MN 55406 - Tuesday, October 18, 2005 0:43 AM CDT

Hi EB - I am also steadily moved by your journal entries, and am honored by the way you let us witness your profoundly sad and enlightening journey with Louann. Thank you, over and over, for sharing so eloquently. My love and gratitude keeps coming your way... Casey
Casey McGee <cmcgee7@yahoo.com>
Duluth, MN - Saturday, October 15, 2005 11:47 AM CDT

Dear Elizabeth,
Thinking of you and Lou ann on this holy holy day. Sending love. Feeling the luminous light shining through that space she left. Feeling it shining through you too.
Maria Kaefer <kaefe002@umn.edu>
- Friday, October 14, 2005 11:15 PM CDT

Dear EB,

I just read your wonderful entry today (october 14) and I am touched. I do come to this site frequently. Please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers.
Celeste Yanisch <sjperron@comcast.net>
- Friday, October 14, 2005 3:14 PM CDT

Hello EB. It still feels wrong to write only "EB." My fingers want to write "EB and Lou Ann." So, I can't imagine how it is for you, EB. I just reread some of the journal comments. It strikes me (again) how much you both are loved.
On my flight to Norway I thought of you and Lou Ann and watched out the window hoping for a sign. The sign didn't come outside the plane but inside the plane. As I was thinking and praying for you both a little girl ran up and down the tiny aisle smiling and giggling. She had a crown on her head that had diamond sparklies and glitter. AND little plastic vegetables. Yep, that was a clear sign that all is right in Lou Ann's world.
Mary Evans <marylevans@mac.com>
- Thursday, October 6, 2005 8:39 PM CDT

Thanks, EB, for reminding me of the continuation of your writing on Caringbridge -- I am not as diligent at reading my e-mail as I ought to be and hadn't realized you were keep it up-to-date. But now I'll bookmark it and be a regular reader.

And I'm so glad we got to spend good time together this weekend -- you are an amazing woman and I learn someting new every time I talk with you, about you, about me, about life. And death. I am especially enjoying imagining you in your lofty, lacey caccoon in the maple tree, and seeing you come down as a butterfly each time.
Paul Landskroener <paulmb@state.net>
Minneapolis, MN - Monday, October 3, 2005 11:39 AM CDT

My dear Elizabeth, I think of you and sweet Lou Ann often. I smile to think that my last words to Lou Ann were spoken in the Uptown Lunds. She was in a cashier's line. I had spotted her from a couple of ailes away, I crept up behind her and said "Ah! here is the most beautiful woman in Lunds". I gave her a hug and a kiss, said "must dash" and ran off. Lewis also sends his love. Michael
Michael Norman <man@mn.rr.com>
Minneapolis, Mn - Wednesday, September 28, 2005 6:06 AM CDT

Hi EB,
I am thinking of you often and wanted to let you know that Kay and I decided not to go to yoga this eve because we are both a bit under the weather...vata season getting to me and overwork getting to her. I missed seeing you.
I would like to get together sometime soon if it works out for you. I'd like to try out that tree hammock. We are not available this weekend or next as well, but I will check my calendar and see if next wed works for me to stop by.
I'm glad to hear you are getting support and crying lots.
Hope you are sleeping better soon. (If you havent tried it, Calms Forte might help. You can get it at the coops or Mastel's).
Very warmly,

Marcia Meredith <marciameredith77@hotmail.com>
- Monday, September 26, 2005 8:16 PM CDT

Dear EB - the photo of Lou Ann crowned at her graduation brought sharp tears - I don't remember seeing it in previous visits to this site. In absence, she is still so vivid a spirit, still so present. Thank you for continuing to share your journey.
Mary Ellen Shaw <Shawx001@umn.edu>
- Wednesday, September 21, 2005 3:07 PM CDT

Hello, Elizabeth. I finally have quieted my own life down enough to review your most recent entries here. Grief is surprising, isn't it? I had heard grief described as "coming and going in waves." When it comes, it sweeps us off our feet and we must sit wherever we find ourselves and lean into it and stay with it until we and it are spent. And then we go on, sometimes as if nothing has happened, and the tide has gone out and we can see the beach that was hidden beneath the depths...

I am glad to know you fear neither the heights of your hammock (which I think is really cool) nor the depths of your grief. I'm also glad I stopped by on a recent Wednesday; that was delightful!

Blessings,
Liz
Liz Oppenheimer
Minneapolis, - Saturday, September 17, 2005 10:44 AM CDT

Dear EB,

Thank you so much for sharing your journey with your postings. Please know that I am thinking of you, and holding you in the Light.

I thought I'd share some of Sylvia's latest adventures -- for the last couple of days she has been practicing standing all by herself. She leans up against something, then pulls away, holding her hands out in front of her or fiddling with a toy, and then balances for 8, 10, and up to 30 seconds at a time, her toes gripping the floor like a karate master. And she practices over and over.... This evening, we dug out a sturdy pushtoy with a big handle and 4 wheels, which we'd been given by some friends. Leaning on it, she walked right across the living room! Amazing.
Carolyn <carolynecarr@hotmail.com>
Minneapolis, MN - Thursday, September 15, 2005 11:34 PM CDT

Dear EB,
I am sorry I did not go to yoga with Kay this evening. I have been thinking of you ever since I saw Louann's obit in the paper and I would have seen you if I had gone. I had been out of state since October studying Ayurveda in New Mexico. I returned home in June. I was so sorry to discover the death of your beloved partner.
Kay and I would like to come to your open invitation on Wednesday. If you get the chance will you email us your address?
Sending you love and light and looking forward to seeing you.
Marcia Meredith
Marcia Meredith <marciameredith77@hotmail.com>
St. Paul, MN US - Monday, September 12, 2005 9:06 PM CDT

Hi EB -

Thank you for the chance for me and Sylvia to visit with you in the afternoon on Lou Ann's birthday. We were talking about the Mississippi River Bluffs in your neighborhood, and I have just learned that Great River Greening will be doing an inventory and management plan for restoration of the bluff in your area. I don't really know the details -- I just heard about it in a recent newsletter they sent out. But if you wanted to learn more, you could go to www.greatrivergreening.org or call Fred Harris, Lead Ecologist at Greening at 651-665-9500. He's a very nice person (former attender at TCFM, actually), and an outstanting botanist.

Glad to hear you made it into (and out of!) the hammock. What a great spot you created.

Love -- Carolyn
Carolyn Carr <carolynecarr@hotmail.com>
Minneapolis, MN - Saturday, September 10, 2005 4:54 PM CDT

Hi E.B.,
I just read all of your recent entries and am thinking of you as you wade into this new life. You and Lou Ann continue to be in my thoughts and prayers.

Jenny Larson
Minneapolis, - Wednesday, September 7, 2005 12:38 AM CDT

Hello dear EB,
Mark and I had a wonderful time at your house on Lou Ann's birthday. We talked about your beauty all the way home. A year of firsts. I can't imagine how this time without her must feel. There are no English--or norsk--words that I know. I CAN AND DO imagine having you in our lives for a very very long time. 50 or 60 years of birthdays.
Mary Evans <marylevans@mac.com>
Newport, MN - Sunday, September 4, 2005 7:11 PM CDT

I continue
to hold you
(both)
in my heart.
Richard <richardfuller@gaiavoices.net>
Saint Paul, MN United States - Tuesday, August 30, 2005 10:10 PM CDT

Dear EB,
Here it is the middle of the night...I just wanted you to know that I am thinking of you and holding you in the light. And Sylvia and I love the idea of getting together on a Wednesday when it suits you. We could take a stroll along the River Gorge, or go to Minnehaha Falls, or just hang out in our front yard watching the butterflies on the plants. The monarchs have been swarming the rough blazing star lately. I'll give you a call tomorrow to set up a time.
Do take care -- Love, Carolyn
Carolyn Carr <carolynecarr@hotmail.com>
Minneapolis, MN - Tuesday, August 30, 2005 2:04 AM CDT

Dear EB,
I just returned from London and I visited the Freud Museum and saw "the couch". LA would have really enjoyed the stories I wanted to share with her about it, especially about Anna Freud and her "special" companion , Dorthy. She would have found it very interesting indeed! I am holding you and Moon and all LA dear friends in my heart. I miss her so much!
Mary <MaryLGooch@aol.com>
- Monday, August 22, 2005 8:38 AM CDT

HI EB,

In reading through this journal and the guestbook entries I feel that I have gotten to know Louann a little better. What a wonderful person she is! I never really knew her, just from a distance and through you talking about her. I now wish I had the chance to bask in her glow. I am sure she is still shining wherever she is, sharing her light with others. What a gift you had being married to her for so many years (20+?)....but it should have been twice that.

Rich and I are holding you in the light from Massachusetts. Your entry about making a fabulous dinner and then crying over it because there was no Louann to share it with was so touching. I am holding Rich and my kids tightly these days, trying not to take them for granted, as we share this intense, intimate and wonderful 6 weeks together in New England.

We have two more weeks before we return to Minnesota. I hope to learn more about Louann and your life together, and to witness your grief, when we return.

Love,

Sue
Sue Cairn <scairn@ties2.net>
Mpls, Mn - Sunday, August 21, 2005 6:47 PM CDT

Dear EB,

You have been in a tender place in my heart the past several weeks. I didn't even know that Louann had been ill and only learned of her passing through the FLGBTQC listserve (Thanks to those Friends who posted there.) just a few weeks ago.

It has been SO long since I have seen either of you but two memories have been with me the past few weeks, so I just thought I would share them with you as my way of being with you, sitting around the kitchen table.

The first memory is of preparing sushi with Louann on a couple of different occasions in your house in South Minneapolis. The food was great, but what I remember even more clearly is the love and joy that went into making it.

The other memory, though, that is quite vivid for me is of the time a group of us went for the weekend to Steve Finn and Jim Durkel's marriage in Austin, Texas, and parked all our cars outside your house (There must have been at least a half dozen cars.) and left the keys with Louann "just in case," as the weather was starting to turn bad when we were leaving. It turned out to be the weekend of the surprise "Halloween Blizzard" and Louann shoveled out all the cars over the weekend and moved them because of the snow emergency. What a labor!

Anyway, school resumes tomorrow for me and it is late, but I just wanted to let you know you have both been much on my mind and in my heart these past weeks.

Take care.

Love,

Mark
Mark Ehrke <bedarky@pacific.net.sg>
Beijing, China - Sunday, August 14, 2005 11:16 AM CDT

Dear Ones,

I am so glad you continue to share openly your journey with Lou Ann, and without her. I hope you'll keep doing so until you are spent, until you feel there is nothing more here for you. "...As long as thou canst," to paraphrase a well-known early Quaker.

It is a comfort for me, who did not know Lou Ann well, to be part of witnessing ALL of the journey you are going through, especially Elizabeth and Moon.

If more of us shared these stories and experiences more openly more often, I believe the world would be much more peaceful: our griefs and our joys and our losses and our discoveries would bind us together in our common humanity.

Blessings,
Liz

Liz Oppenheimer
Minneapolis, - Sunday, August 14, 2005 10:42 AM CDT

Moon: I am still checking the site and was moved by your dream. I will think of all of you tomorrow in MN at Lou Ann's service and will be with you in spirit. A friend in MN sent me the obituary from the paper and I was glad to see Lou Ann's smiling face one more time. Thinking of all of you...Sima in New York
Sima Rabinowitz <srabinowitz@earthlink.net>
New York, NY US - Saturday, August 6, 2005 8:59 AM CDT

Hi EB. I think of Lou Ann and you every day. I rode her scooter today and was sailing down the street with tears in my eyes. I'm looking forward to the service on Sunday. We'll see you them.
Mary And Mark Evans-Nuebel <marylevans@mac.com>
- Friday, August 5, 2005 10:40 PM CDT

Thanks Moon for the dream. Mark and I are thinking of you and your family.

Mary And Mark Evans-Nuebel <Marylevans@mac.com>
- Friday, August 5, 2005 10:35 PM CDT

Dear Elizabeth, Lou Ann and all friends, I know Lou Ann and Elizabeth from a group Lou Ann and I shared over 14 years ago. Soon after, I was gone and later only back quite peripherally in your lives. My huge loss. But I did not fail to notice and never have mislaid the effects on me of experienceing just a bit, your strong love for each other and everyone else you encountered. Reading the journal just now has been an added GIFT. Your description, EB, of Lou Ann's intense and loving gazes into her friends faces, is my memory of her too, from way back in group together, 15 years ago. My heart is with you. Love, Carol
Carol Bidon <carolbidon@hotmail.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Friday, August 5, 2005 2:19 PM CDT

Dear Moon: On an intuition, I checked the website today. What a comforting dream. Thank you for continuing to share your process and this dream.
Jane Levin <levin015@umn.edu>
- Thursday, August 4, 2005 8:55 PM CDT

Dear EB, I join your many friends in holding you in prayer and in the light. I remember a FGC Summer Gathering workshop we shared (ages ago !) on Healing with Sound. I wish you that good healing thrum. In peace, Rachel Potter, Madison Friends Meeting and FLGC.
Rachel Potter <rachelpotter5@yahoo.com>
- Thursday, August 4, 2005 2:29 PM CDT

thnaks for sharing your dream. i actually do still check the web site so thanks for communicating with us. love Elizabeth
ELizabeth Bohun <eboun@msn.com>
Mpls, MN - Thursday, August 4, 2005 12:29 AM CDT

Thanks for sharing your dream, Moon. I'm sure your feeling is exactly the way it is - she is being taken care of wherever she is. I think of her daily and although I will not be with you this weekend, I will pause and pray with everyone.
Love,
Janet
Janet Wigfield <jwigmc2@aol.com>
Bronxville, NY - Wednesday, August 3, 2005 4:40 PM CDT

EB:heard of LouAnn's passing upon arriving back in berlin after being 10 days away. please know i am thinking of you during this time. as i am very far away i am unable to attend her service, however elena informed me of the date and time and i have planned to allow that time to sit quietly and reflect on her life.
ligeia :) <ligeiasmith@hotmail.com>
Berlin, Germany - Tuesday, August 2, 2005 2:00 PM CDT

EB: We just returned from our vacation and learned of Lou Ann's passing last week. We send our love and prayers to you for comfort and to Lou Ann that her spirit may continue to shine and soar. It has been a most intimate, profound journey and we thank you for including the larger community of people who care about you to accompany you through it.
Steve Marchese & Jodi Sandfort (and sons) <smarchese@earthlink.net>
Minneapolis, MN - Saturday, July 30, 2005 11:11 PM CDT

EB
You have been in my heart as you and your beloved have taken this most blessed and intimate of journeys.
Jean Eckerly
Jean Eckerly <jasen@visi.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Saturday, July 30, 2005 8:57 AM CDT

Querida Elizabeth,
Aqui en Chile me he enterado de la muerte de Lou Ann. Quiero que sepas que te mando mucho amor. Prender� unas velas, quemar� incienso y mandar� amor para Lou Ann a traves de mis dioces y diosas. Despues de leer el diario de los ultimos dias de Lou Ann y de los comentarios de sus amigos y gente querida, me quedan nada mas que ganas de ser mejor persona. Un beso y un abrazo sincero. Marcela Rodriguez.
Marcela Rodriguez <marcela_r_a@hotmail.com>
Concon, Chile - Friday, July 29, 2005 5:20 PM CDT

Dear Friends:
I have just now learned of LouAnn's death as I had not seen the jouranl for several days. I am writing to say how deeply sad I am, how glad I am to have known her, and how much I know you will all miss her. Thinking of you at this difficult time -- Sima in New York.
Sima Rabinowitz <srabinowitz@earthlink.net>
New York, NY USA - Thursday, July 28, 2005 7:51 PM CDT

Lou Ann was a brillant therapist and spiritual mentor to me. I have never known anyone to be so gifted at her craft. Almost every time I spent time with her I felt like I had experienced an epiphany. She changed my life in so many profound ways-I owe her a lifetime of gratitude. My friends and family members all know about Lou Ann and have benefited from her wisdom although they have never met her. It is very hard to believe she is gone but after reading the journal entries you have posted I feel comforted by the grace and tenderness with which her life came to an end. It is yet another way my life has been enriched by hers. My heartfelt condolences go out to Elizabeth and Moon and all the others she held closest. I wish I could come to the Memorial service to honor her in person but instead I offer you my love and prayers. I could say so much more......and I thank you so much for sharing this process with us. Karen
Karen Harris <karenharrismn@hotmail.com>
San Diego, CA USA - Thursday, July 28, 2005 6:21 PM CDT

Dear Elizabeth and Moon and Loved Ones,

I have been following your days here in this beautiful journal.

This was a scrap found on Raymond Carver's desk after he died from Cancer.

Late Fragment

And did you get what
you wanted from this life, even so?
I did.
And what did you want?
To call myself beloved, to feel myself
beloved on the earth.

Yes she was. Yes you are.

With Additional Love,

Mary La Chapelle <mlacha@slc.edu>
San Francisco, CA - Tuesday, July 26, 2005 2:00 PM CDT

Dear Elizabeth-
I just heard about LouAnn-so sorry that this has happened. And I feel privileged to share the last few months through this web site. As I keep thinking of you, holding you both in my heart, I remembered an old quote from Ram Dass.

'Death has such great importance in this society that it affects everything. I learned from my guru that death is not the enemy, as well as from Emmanuel (a spirit who is channeled by Pat Rodegast). In a session once, I asked Emmanuel, "So many people ask me about death, so what should I tell them?" He answered, "You can tell them it�s absolutely safe." '

And I wish it could have waited a long while.
Love and Hugs,
Judy
Judy Baxter <baxter@epi.umn.edu>
St. Louis Park, MN USA - Tuesday, July 26, 2005 10:10 AM CDT

EB,Moon,Family & Community-
Congratulations on a tremendous and beautiful job of helping Lou Ann die.
Vacant and Surreal as these days will no doubt continue to be, I hope you each can take some time to acknowledge what a huge personal gift you have given, honoring such a precious soul and a life well-lived.
Bravo!
Ann Potter
- Monday, July 25, 2005 10:03 PM CDT

Dear Elizabeth,
We are so very sad to learn of LouAnn's passing. Thank you for sharing with us the journey you two have taken to reach this point. When my father died of cancer over a period of 6 months, I felt so priviledged to have been a part of his life and of his death. I know how you will miss LouAnn and I mourn your loss most of all. We send you our love and hopes for a chance to meet again someday for a personal hug. For now, know that we care and send you our thoughts and energy to help you at this moment in time.
Love, Mary and Woody
Mary and Woody Emlen <maryemlen@comcast.net>
Denver, CO - Monday, July 25, 2005 9:44 PM CDT

Dearest EB,Moon,Mindy -
I'm so sorry for your loss. It seems so impossible. LouAnn exuded such kindness, sweetness, and gentleness -- all this to me and yet, so much more to you. I appreciate how you have made it possible for your entire extended community to participate in this process and send our love.
Please know I am with you in thought and prayer.
love,
Janet
Janet Wigfield <jwigmc2@aol.com>
Bronxville, NY USA - Monday, July 25, 2005 5:13 PM CDT

EB, my heart goes out to you. I know you and LouAnn loved each other dearly; I am so sorry for your loss. I hold you in the Light during this painful transition.
Mary Kay Kernan <mkkernan@stthomas.edu>
Afton, MN USA - Monday, July 25, 2005 2:22 PM CDT

EB, Moon, Mindy, Elena

I extend my profound sadness of the enormous loss of such a wonderful soul: partner, twin sister, sister-in-law, step-mother, dear friend, soul sister, and colleague to many. While I had heard a few weeks ago about Lou Ann's cancer and all of your cancer journey, I was shocked to learn from Velma on Sat. how serious it was. I had no idea nor did I know of this incredible caringbridge journal entries created by you EB. When I got home on Sat. I immediately called Heron and left a message inquiring about how Lou Ann and you all were doing only to get a voicemail response that she had passed to spirit that very day.

Even though I know that I have not had close connections with you all for many years, the enormity of the loss shocks and touches me deeply. I remember conversations with her through the years at different community events and of her enthusiasm when she was selling her pottery at the Powderhorn Art Festival some years back. I remember many wonderful connections and experiences as well with you EB.

I am so sorry about her loss and the loss for you EB. I can not even imagine the experience of loosing someone you have loved and made family with and shared a life and community with for so long. Moon: I am so sorry for you that your beloved twin sister is gone.

Since I heard only so recently about what she and all of you were going through with the cancer journey, I look forward to learning more from reading the moving writings from you EB. EB, I heard from others who have read your entries of their power, vulnerability and lovingness. I cryed reading the entries in the guestbook from all who love and know her.

I send love and healing to all of you and look forward to seeing you at Shiva. Janet Dahlem

Janet Dahlem <jldahlem@stkate.edu>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Monday, July 25, 2005 12:28 AM CDT

There is love! In my thoughts and hopes.
Karen
Karen Davis <davis136@tc.umn.edu>
- Monday, July 25, 2005 12:07 AM CDT

EB
I'm so sorry. Word has been passed around at the co-op, and you are in all of our thoughts.

Naomi Jackson <naomijx@juno.com>
- Monday, July 25, 2005 11:39 AM CDT

EB,

I don't normally read the TCFM newsletter very closely, but did for some reason this morning and read the news of Lou Ann last struggle. I read your journal entry and cried for you and Lou Ann. I am so sorry. I have been too much out of touch from the meeting and had no idea she was so sick.

My deepest love, prayers and condolences to you and your loss.
Chante Wolf <chantewolf7@hotmail.com>
St. Anthony, MN USA - Monday, July 25, 2005 8:17 AM CDT

E.B

we are very sorry for your loss. Our memories will be of Xmas and happier times for you and Lou Ann.

Sincerely,
Sandi, Dudley, Dana & Kara Younkin

Sandi Younkin <skyounkin@hotmail.com>
St. Paul, MN - Monday, July 25, 2005 8:13 AM CDT

EB, Much love. Holding you in the light. I knew LouAnn only a little but clearly she was the love of your life. I cannot imagine your experience but I will keep you company. After reading the latest news here, I am of course sad, and also humbled, inspired, helped to be more grounded and open. Thank you for the gifts of your clarity, centeredness, sharing deeply of yourself, opening yourself to life and, tragically, to death.
-Jamie
Jamie Buss <jamiebuss@msn.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Monday, July 25, 2005 7:54 AM CDT

Dear Elizabeth,
My thoughts and prayers are with you and with Lou Ann.
I am so sorry for your loss. And so appreciative of the way you and Lou Ann have lived throughout this time.
Love, Rosemary
Rosemary Martin <rosemarymmartin@att.net>
Minneapolis, MN - Sunday, July 24, 2005 8:02 PM CDT

Lou Ann we will miss you. Life has lost a very special soul.

elizabeth Cashin <elizabethcashin@yahoo.com>
minneapolis, mn - Sunday, July 24, 2005 7:57 PM CDT

E.B.
I am so sorry to know about Lou Ann's passing. I can't imagine how difficult it must be for you. I celebrate the life you and she had together and am so sorry for this tragic early ending to her life. From what I can tell, you and the rest of her family and friends did everything you could to care for her gently and lovingly throughout this terrible time of illness. I honor you for your courage and your love. My heart is very sad. I am sorry that a trip out of town for business will prevent me from coming to any of the events marking her life but I will be with you in spirit.
Love, Jan
Janice Ann Smith <jasmith@mm.com>
St. Paul, MN USA - Sunday, July 24, 2005 3:29 PM CDT

EB - I am sorry for your loss. What amazing, wonderful, loving people!

Peace be with you,

Lynda Anderson <ander447@umn.edu>
St. Paul, MN USA - Sunday, July 24, 2005 1:59 PM CDT

Dearest EB. Our deepest condolences to you, your, and Lou Ann's family now at this time of Lou Ann's passing. As ever you are in our hearts. Love, Judy and Wendy
Judy Fairbrother and Wendy Lane
Saint Paul, MN USA - Sunday, July 24, 2005 1:20 PM CDT

Dear EB,
What a blessed gift you have shared with us all. It is such a bittersweet journey, thank you for opening so much of your hearts and lives to your friends and community. Of course it is not a surprise, you both have done so for as long as I have know you. I am so grateful to have had the chance to know LouAnn. EB you have always been such a blessed presence in my life and my daughters lives. I love you both very much.
I wish there was a way to sing to you through this guest book, but I will settle for writing down the words to the song that is ringing in my head and heart. This is an old Claudia Schmidt song with a beautiful melody.

"Fare Well my Friends I�m Bound for Canaan
I�m traveling through the wilderness
Your company has been delightful
You do not leave my mind distressed

I go away
Behind to leave you
Perhaps never to meet again
But if we never have the pleasure
I hope we�ll meet on Canaan�s Land"

I will come sit shiva with you and sing this song.
My thoughts, prayers, and love are with you, LouAnn and your family.
Jane Schallert <tom-jane@mn.rr.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Sunday, July 24, 2005 1:36 AM CDT

What a beautiful dream, like one I had with Rosie, and now Lou Ann is living it. EB, we love you and we'll be with you.
Malva and Steve <malvacohen@aol.com>
- Sunday, July 24, 2005 1:20 AM CDT

EB,

We have scanned much of your journal this evening and we hold you and all your and LouAnn's family and communities in the light as you take these next steps of your journey. Thank you for this gift of allowing your wider community to be brought into and held in the power of these moments. The vibrancy of your love for each other, your spiritual centeredness, your presence to the moment shines through your daily updates. Blessings
Annika Fjelstad and Heather Ferguson <fjel0001@umn.edu>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Sunday, July 24, 2005 1:07 AM CDT

Elizabeth,
Blessings on you, and on Lou ann.
Last night I had a dream in which I received an email titled "Lou ann finally made it home." I suppose the world after this can communicate with us by any route...

and today, reading Mary Oliver's poem, When Death Comes, I thought of Lou ann especially

When its over, i want to say: all my life
I was a bride married to amazement.
I was the bridegroom, taking the world into my arms...

Here's to lou ann, who did both, and helped many of us to do so, too.

You will be in my heart these days. Thank you for including us in this time and for the compassion with which you hold not only yourself, but all of us.
Maria
Maria Kaefer <kaefe002@umn.edu>
- Sunday, July 24, 2005 1:05 AM CDT

Dear Elizabeth and Lou Ann,
Living so far away has made the reality of Lou Ann's battle with cancer hard to realize and yet the beauty and pain of your struggle expressed in your journal has allowed me to be there in a different way. Thank you for sharing so much of yourselves. It has been an irreplaceable gift. Lou Ann, I can't imagine a world without you next to EB, but I admire how you two have been partners throughout and your love for each other sets an example for us all.

Holding you in the Light,

Carol Damm
- Sunday, July 24, 2005 0:41 AM CDT

Sweet LouAnn & Elizabeth,
I wanted to share a prayer that has become very special to me;
ALL IS WELL
Death is nothing at all...
I have only slipped away into the next room.
I am I and you are you.
Whatever we were to each other that we still are.
Call me by my old familiar name,
speak to me in the easy way you always used.
Put no difference into your tone;
wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow.
Laugh as we always laughed
at the little jokes we enjoyed together.
Play, smile, think of me, pray for me.
Let my name be ever the household word
that it always was.
Let it be spoken without effect
without the trace of a shadow on it.
Life means all that it ever was;
there is absolutely unbroken continuity.
Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight?
I am but waiting for you for an interval,
Somewhere very near just around the corner.
All is well.
Canon Henry Scott Holland, St Pauls Cathedral

all my love, Michael
Michael Norman <man@mn.rr.com>
Minneapolis, MN - Saturday, July 23, 2005 11:46 PM CDT

The Sun rises, warming everything in its path.
In it's travels, much growth and sharing occurs.
Setting slowly on the horizon, the Sun waits.
And is greeted by the approach of twilight.
Cool light eagerly embracing all that had been touched by the Sun.

Lou Ann and E.B.
Thank you both for spreading your warmth during your travels.
Angela & Jonetta <angel_dvs@yahoo.com>
St. Paul, Mn - Saturday, July 23, 2005 10:05 PM CDT

Dear E.B. and Lou Ann,

Thank you for the strong and clear Love that has shone steadily through you both, and radiated to so many. I will continue to hold you in the Light as you complete this leg of your journey together, and know that Love will sustain you. Thank you for the beautiful photos. Namaste.
Love and Peace,
Barbara
Barbara Simmonds <barbarasimmonds@bmsreiki.com>
St Paul, MN - Saturday, July 23, 2005 6:30 PM CDT

"Most people die with their music still locked inside them." I celebrate the beautiful symphony given voice by the wonder-filled love you two share.
Dorothy Helfrick <dhelfrick@snet.net>
East Hartford, CT USA - Saturday, July 23, 2005 5:20 PM CDT

EB and Lou Ann
Thank you for sharing your journey with us. We continue to hold you in the Light.
Sandi Bandli and Chris Clauson
TCFM
Sandi Bandli & /Chris Clauson <bandliclauson@aol.com>
New Hope, MN USA - Saturday, July 23, 2005 3:26 PM CDT

I am in awe and so grateful for the beauty coming through these journal pages. These writings have been such an incredible gift of love, giving us all a glimpse into the intimate (tender and difficult) moments of your living/dying process. Thank you Lou Ann, EB, Moon, and all of your near and dear ones. I offer a toast to your open hearts and spirits (with french liqueur on a sponge stick).
Many blessings and much love,
Annie Follett <afollett@bitstream.net>
Minneapolis, MN - Saturday, July 23, 2005 12:40 AM CDT

I am going to miss you so much, LouAnn! So many Friday afternoons and weekends we have spent together in our analytic training. I am in CA and it is astonishing how many butterflies I have seen in the last 2 days. You will always be part of me, my friend.
Mary <MaryLGooch@aol.com>
Minneapolis, CA - Saturday, July 23, 2005 8:54 AM CDT

I had three of the most beautiful big orange butterflies in my yard yesterday ..... rather unusual, but , from now on, each sighting will make me think of you , my dear friend, Lou Ann. Much love to you and thank you for your precious friendship. I will miss you. God speed.

Gail <Shermgail@aol.com>
Ft. Lauderdale, FL USAA - Saturday, July 23, 2005 8:05 AM CDT

..the hospice nurse told my dying father last month that in order to speed his death, he should eat and drink very small amounts, rather than avoiding all food/water- which provokes the body into major survival mode and extends the dying process. She said that eating just very small amounts fools the body into bypassing its natural survival mechanism and makes for a faster passing. And, it worked./ Thought I'd pass this along, echoing Maggie's recommendation of course.

Sending loads of love to both of you, down here in Illinois at 105F.
(Q: what's the avg daily temperature in Heaven?)
xxx Annie Potter
Ann Potter
- Friday, July 22, 2005 10:14 PM CDT

We are thinking of our wonderful neighbors every minute. It was so good to see you all on Monday. We love you,
Jane & Dave <jprince71@yahoo.com>
St. Paul, MN USA - Friday, July 22, 2005 5:31 PM CDT

Lou Ann - fly free, fly well. Now you are nearly home, and an ocean of beauty, love, and light reaches out to embrace you.

EB - all my love. Hold hard to the certainty you share as you glimpse the ocean of light reflected in Lou Ann's eyes. Thank you for sharing this rich and painful experience. I will hold you both, and your loving families, in my prayers.
Mary Ellen Shaw <shawx001@umn.edu>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Friday, July 22, 2005 2:12 PM CDT

There is obviously a lot of love being released at your house. When I was there on Sunday, it felt just like a family anticipating the birth of a baby, though the tears taste differently. You are both making the world richer with love.

We'll be drinking a root beer float for you tonight, and will think of Lou Ann every time we do.
Paul Landskroener & Marybeth Neal <paulmb@state.net>
Minneapolis, MN United States - Friday, July 22, 2005 1:45 PM CDT

I am holding you both daily in the Light. May the blessings that are yours come with a gentle sprit and provide you even more strength.
Peace with love,
Becky Flory
Becky Flory <jkflor@aol.com>
St. Paul, Mn USA - Friday, July 22, 2005 12:33 AM CDT

EB, Mary and I are grateful for your sharing with us your experiences of Lou Ann's last days and hours. Thanks for the spiritual beauty you create with Lou Ann. You teach so much! We hold you both in our thoughts and in the light.
Jack Phillips <jacph@aol.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Thursday, July 21, 2005 10:21 PM CDT

We are holding you in our hearts.
Richard, Betsy, Carla <richardfuller@gaiavoices.net>
Saint Paul, MN United States - Thursday, July 21, 2005 7:56 PM CDT

dear louann, eb, mindy and moon,
last night i played klezmer music at lake harriet with the tsatskelehs band. i play percussion and drummed heartbeats of love and prayer to all of you. i hope you got a wave of that wonderful jewish music. it was for all of you. i whispered your name, louann, across lake harriet and watched the gulls flying in the sky. take care, lisa albrecht
lisa albrecht <lalbrech@umn.edu>
Minneapolis, mn - Thursday, July 21, 2005 12:17 AM CDT

Making Peace

Someone dropped
a smooth stone deep
into a lake. Even as it fell
it flashed the failing light, swirled
a subtle little dance
according to its curves
as it learned the language of water.
On its way home, the stone
gave its warmth away (one last gift
to a shivering world)
and made its peace
with the mud and the mystery
sleeping there.

love,

james
James Riemermann <jamestr@gmail.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Thursday, July 21, 2005 10:16 AM CDT

For many months, I've been holding you two in daily meditation as I sip tea. I have a very short personal prayer list that I hold during that time. Besides you two is a dear friend who lives out-of-town. Sometimes, I feel close and powerful only through prayer.

Thank you for keeping we people peripheral to your lives aware of your sacred time. Your love sustains you now and will transcend this awe. The care and love the rest of us has for both of you will support EB somewhat in the future.

When children are born we can see quickly traits of the personality they carry lifelong. Louann is showing her good-humored, intentional self now. EB, you are showing us love for Louann,family, friends, and us in ether land.

Your lives and love for each other are a gift I honor.

Oh - in honesty, the daily tea has switched to iced water lately.

I hold you both in light and love daily.

Elaine Martin <emartin@scc.net>
- Thursday, July 21, 2005 10:12 AM CDT

Seems a good time for a poem. Love you,Louann. from Julia

Some Kiss We Want

There is some kiss we want with
our whole lives,the touch of
spirit on the body. Seawater
begs the pearl to break its shell.
And the lilly, how passionately
it needs some wild darling! At
night, I open the window and ask
the moon to come and press its
face against mine. Breathe into
me. Close the language door and
open the love window. The moon
won�t use the door, only the window.

RUMI

Translated by Coleman Barks

Julia Archer <wildarcher1@aol.com>
Colorado Springs, CO USA - Thursday, July 21, 2005 10:05 AM CDT

Dear EB,
I loved the pictures...Lou Ann with such a confident smile and then you with your arms wrapped around her. I wish I had had a chance to know Lou Ann. Thank you both for being such lights, such role models for right living and dying. You're in my heart...Bridget Fensholt

Bridget Fensholt <bfensholt@comcast.net>
- Thursday, July 21, 2005 6:42 AM CDT

Dear LouAnn and EB,

Zoe found your website last week and I found her in tears reading it. We've been reading daily ever since. We feel so sad. Thankyou for sharing your experience. Although we've known about your diagnosis since almost the beginning, it is still so hard to believe and accept.
We found out less than a month ago that Zoe has breast cancer. She had surgery and her prognosis is excellent but we are awaiting the start of her treatments with a mixture of dread and eagerness to get on with it. I know you understand. LouAnn, I miss seeing you at the analytic events. Its been so nice to see your familiar face amongst all the strangers and I've been inspired to carry on with my pursuit because of what you accomplished. I'm so so sorry this has happened to you.
Moon, I've thought of you so often. I can only imagine what you are going through. Zoe is especially relating to you facing the loss of your twin.
We send you both our energy and loving thoughts.
Candace and Zoe
p.s. I'd be happy to bring some food over. Is there someone I should call to get scheduled?
Candace Margulies and Zoe Nicholie <znicholie@hotmail.com>
minneapolis, mn u.s. - Wednesday, July 20, 2005 9:46 PM CDT

A friend of Pat's, I am grateful to be able to feel some connection to you and to to get updates. I have selfishly been missing my dear friend in Duluth. She has spoken so often and so highly of you both. I am glad she can be there-that you all can spend this time together. My thoughts and prayers are with you. You are held by holy angels - all around you.
Paula Pedersen <ppederse@d.umn.edu>
Duluth, MN - Wednesday, July 20, 2005 6:03 PM CDT

I last saw LouAnn at a Shiva, she had come to help out and we were so grateful for her help, although she wasn't sure she was helpful at all.
I don't know what else to say. I send thoughts of love and support to you.

Harvey Zuckman <hzuckman@firsttech.com>
Minneapolis, MN United States - Wednesday, July 20, 2005 5:40 PM CDT

Dear EB and Louann,
I think of you often and am sending love and light to you both. Your artful approach to life is evident in how you have lived and loved throughout this very difficult time of your lives together. I have fond memories of being in your home and seeing all the creativity and love you have put into it, of conversations at art fairs, of being part of shared communities. It is so moving to see how much love and support flow through this journal. You obviously have created a beautiful circle of healing.
Thankk you for all you do and have done to make this community whole and full of beauty. I treasure my Louann Lewis raku pottery each day.
EB, there couldn't be a better midwife!
I hold you in my heart,
Love,
Barbra Wiener
Barbra Wiener <barbrawiener@mac.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Wednesday, July 20, 2005 7:29 AM CDT

Louann and EB,

I just found out today from Harvey Zuckman and then later from Mark LaChapelle about this cancer. I am so sorry I didn't know earlier, and wasn't able to share my love and respect for you in person. Louann, although we haven't been in touch in the recent past, my memories of you go back to shortly after I moved here in 1976. It is clear how important you both were as a part of my life, my relationship, and our time raising our daughter. Louann, I have such wonderful and fond memories of our friendship, and even remember sitting at your dining room table one time, drinking tea while you told me about this interesting woman you were falling in love with. That relationship has stood you both in good stead for many years. I send my love to you both, and I trust fully that your spirituality, which I found to be so strong in you, is helping to move you on to a better place. I wish peace and comfort to you both.
With much love,
-Jackie Fendler
Jackie Fendler <fendl001@tc.umn.edu>
Richfield, MN USA - Tuesday, July 19, 2005 10:46 PM CDT

EB and Lou Ann,
I close my eyes and try to imagine the immensity of what is happening. All emotions wrapped and unwrapped so many times. It is an honor to read about your journey. Thank you for the continued updates of letting us in to what is as EB puts it the essence of our human self. It is quite humbling.
Love,
Lisa
Lisa Rowe <lrowe@edenpr.org>
- Tuesday, July 19, 2005 8:41 PM CDT

Lisa Albrecht just told me about Lou Ann...I just read the history of what has been happening to you the past few months and am so sorry for what you have had to experience and very touched by all the love and support around you. You were a remarkable student (almost 25 years ago!) and have helped so many people with your social work skills. I hope that the next few days are peaceful ones for you. Thinking of you and your partner.
Jean Quam <jquam@che.umn.edu>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Tuesday, July 19, 2005 5:23 PM CDT

Our paths have crossed infrequesntly, but we ask Michael and Lewis about you two often. Michael shared with us about your current journey. You are in our thoughts and prayers.
Judy and Nena <jbrown@tubmanfamilyalliance.org>
St. Paul, MN USA - Tuesday, July 19, 2005 3:31 PM CDT

I love you Lou
Barbo <bdieckman@csc.com>
- Tuesday, July 19, 2005 12:58 AM CDT

"If Death were a Woman" says it all. I hold you both deeply in my thoughts and prayers.
Lynne Holman <Lynneholman@cs.com>
Minneapolis, MN - Tuesday, July 19, 2005 11:14 AM CDT

Dear E.B. and Lou Ann,
As I think of you both right now, in this intense, precious, painful and deeply spiritual time, I keep hearing in my head a line from a song from my daughter's recent theater performance....
"You are part of the human heart."
It is a heart we all share with you both right now, and with all who have loved you.
I have felt honored to witness your deep love for each other, and the strength of charachter you both bring to this most difficult of transitions. Your love is an inspiration to us all.
Blessings to you both,
Terese
Terese Pritschet <teresemarie@mac.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Tuesday, July 19, 2005 9:38 AM CDT

For many months, I've sat daily holding your love for each other as I drink tea. I have a very short personal prayer list ( you two and a dear friend of 40+ years' standing) that I contemplate in prayer each day. There has been no day that you have been out of my thoughts. Both of you will continue to be with me at my daily quiet tea time.
Elaine Martin
- Tuesday, July 19, 2005 9:23 AM CDT

Betsy and Carla and I talk about you at meals and are holding you in our hearts.
Richard Fuller <richardfuller@gaiavoices.net>
Saint Paul, MN United States - Tuesday, July 19, 2005 8:06 AM CDT

Dear Louann and EB,
You are both in my heart as you have this cherished time together. Louann, I am remembering the the teapot which you gave to FNVW for last year's craft sale. It was a teapot for peace. An inventive teapot tank...for peace. A one of a kind creation. I loved looking at it.
May the blessings you need be with you.
Love, Caron Moore
Caron Moore <caron.moore@childrenshc.org>
St Pul, MN United States - Monday, July 18, 2005 6:24 PM CDT

Dearest LouAnn & EB -
You are so precious to me. Thank you both for all your gifts - of life and love and laughter - over the years. My heart breaks and is bouyed all at the same time. I keep you in my prayers as you continue your respective journeys.
All my Love,
Janet
Janet Wigfield <jwigmc2@aol.com>
Bronxville, NY USA - Monday, July 18, 2005 5:08 PM CDT

This journal is such a gift to us all. Your optimism and hope shines through even during the stormiest of times. I want to thank you, EB and Moon, for your generosity in filling us in regularly on Lou Ann's status and its effects on you. Keep your sense of humor during this absurd unfolding. That will carry the two of you through as Lou Ann is carried to her ultimate freedom and peace. My love is with all of you.

Velma Wagner <vwyoga@yahoo.com>
Minneapolis, MN - Monday, July 18, 2005 3:51 PM CDT

We wish you Godspeed.
Laurel Samuels
San Francisco, CA USA - Monday, July 18, 2005 1:05 PM CDT

Dear Lou Ann and Elizabeth,

We are so saddened to hear your latest news. Although we only met you that one time at the �Fossi� performance, we feel that through this most intimate giving journal of yours we have come to know you, and we grieve with you your many losses and rejoice with you your moments of triumph, beautiful transcendence, and wise appreciation of what�s truly eternal.

Lou Ann, it is obvious that you have touched many people�s lives profoundly and that your spirit will live on through your many acts of creativity and love. You are a blessing and we imagine you have no regrets. We share with you your joy that you feel mostly relieved of physical pain now and will soon be able to feel eternal peace. We join hands with you spiritually as you courageously face the sorrow of saying goodby to those you love and the joys of this life.

Elizabeth, you have been so strong, courageous, loving, and giving. Yes, you are blessed to have had Lou Ann as your life partner and to have shared the moments of this struggle that were beautiful or made you feel closer, and to have had the time to really say goodby to each other. And we know you will survive this horrific loss, change and grow, and become even more beautiful and wise than you already are, but we are also empathically with you as you and Lou Ann part. We know how truly painful and hard it can be, and we are there for you in any way you might like in the weeks, months, and years ahead.

With love and our prayers for you,
Cathleen Fields and Linda Masse

Cathleen Fields and Linda Masse <cfields2@mn.rr.com>
Minnetonka, MN U.S.A. - Monday, July 18, 2005 11:13 AM CDT

You are in our hearts and our prayers. We are sending you love.
Elizabeth O'Sullivan <Elizabethosulli@hotmail.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Monday, July 18, 2005 10:00 AM CDT

Dear LouAnn,
My first emotion after reading Elizabeth's Saturday post was deep sadness, but I find that as the hours have passed, that first feeling has gradually been replaced with a profound joy knowing that your life energy will continue in many forms in all the people that you have touched so generously in your lifetime and that the ripples from each one of us will propagate and intersect over and over and....over.

Thank you LouAnn.
May love and peace be yours forever,
Bruce and Chris
Bruce Baldwin <bruce.baldwin@phoenixwm.com>
Manchester, CT - Monday, July 18, 2005 8:53 AM CDT

Louann & EB- I am praying for a safe and loving passage, as you each begin a new life chapter. Know that I'll keep singing "Love Will Guide Us" for you, down here in Illinois, in my parent's backyard. Wish I could be closer. Thank you for your spirit and courage. The 4 barred owls & 3 deer & I here are all sending our love, Ann Potter

p.s. Here's a poem that still helps me think of my mom, out there traveling the universe.

Gone from My Sight-
I am standing on the seashore. A ship spreads her sail to the morning breeze and starts for the ocean. I stand watching her until she fades on the horizon and someone at my side says: "She is gone!"
Gone where? The loss of sight is in me, not in her. Just at the moment when someone says "she is gone," there are others watching her coming. Other voices take up the glad shout, "Here she comes!"
And that is dying.

-Author Unknown

Ann Potter
Minneapolis, MN USA - Monday, July 18, 2005 0:36 AM CDT

Dear LouAnn,

I have such positive memories of our shared time at Northland, as well as socially, over these 25 years. I will now attach even deeper meaning to my admiration of your pots, vessels of your memory, in our home and in my office.

It sounds like you have arrived at a particularly rich time on your journey. I am so glad that you are bathed in love and light as you say good bye.

Ellen Cort, the Wisconsin Poet Laureate, befriended our family over the years and asked me to read this poem, "If Death Were A Woman," at the celebration of my sister's life last year. I would like to channel it to you at this poignant moment:

If Death Were A Woman

I'd want her to come for me
smelling of cinnamon wearing
bright cotton purple maybe hot
pink a red bandana in her hair

She'd bring good coffee papaya juice
bouquet of sea grass saltine crackers
and a lottery ticket We'd dip
our fingers into moist pouches

of lady-slippers crouch down to see
how cabbages feel when wind bumps
against them in the garden
We'd walk through Martin's woods

find the old house it's crumbling
foundation strung with honeysuckle
and in the front yard a surprise
jonquils turning the air yellow

glistening and ripe still blooming
for a gardener long gone We'd head
for the beach wearing strings of shells
around our left ankles laugh

at their ticking sounds the measured
beat that comes with dancing
on hard-packed sand the applause
of ocean and gulls She'd play

ocarina songs to a moon almost full
and I'd sing-off key We'd glide
and swoop become confetti of leaf fall
all wings floating on small whirlwinds

never once dreading the heart-
silenced drop And when it was time
she would not bathe me Instead we'd
scrub the porch pour leftover

water on flowers stand a long time
in sun and silence then holding hands
we'd pose for pictures in the last light

Scott and I are standing in the spirit of your earthly circle "as you glide and swoop.....in the last light".

With profound respect and love,

Mark
Mark LaChapelle <mlachapelle@mn.rr.com>
St Louis Park, mn - Sunday, July 17, 2005 7:53 PM CDT

dear EB and LouAnn
we've been keeping up from afar and just heard that you, LouAnn, are starting on a new journey toward peace, free from pain...and you, EB, are starting a different journey, one of loss and healing. we are sending you both prayers. please know that you are in are hearts. love, lisa and pat
lisa albrecht and pat rouse <lalbrech@umn.edu>
Minneapolis, MN - Sunday, July 17, 2005 7:28 PM CDT

Lou Ann and EB-
elizabeth(bohun) was very kind to call me because she did not know if i was aware of your cancer.i so appreciated knowing so that i can now also hold you two in the light.i have many memories of your stellar abilities to be both present and loving in the best and worst of times.
EB, i can think of no one more loving to be able to midwife louann in this next crossing.Lou Ann, no one has stronger legs than you to make this leap. thank you for the intimacy of this journal, it is a gift to all of us.we shall all be holding you in our hearts. linda

linda harness <ljharness@msn.com>
minneapolis, mn. - Sunday, July 17, 2005 3:59 PM CDT

LouAnn, EB and Moon,

May the spirit of love and light surround you and hold you in peace.

Mary <MaryLGooch@aol.com>
Minneapolis, MN 55416 - Sunday, July 17, 2005 12:07 AM CDT

Lou Ann, I'm thinking of all the people I knew who were reached and helped by your professional connection with them and I'm sure that those impulses of healing that you sent out are in some way being returned when you need them.I'll hold you and EB in my heart.
Hilary <hsandall@aol.com>
Minneapolis, MN - Sunday, July 17, 2005 11:36 AM CDT

Lou Ann and EB - Feel the warmth of so many family and friends, but it's the light within that is carrying you through. Thank you for sharing this journey. I wish with all my heart that you find peace.

love, Cathy
Cathy de Moll <cdemoll@comcast.net>
St. Paul, MN - Sunday, July 17, 2005 11:27 AM CDT

I held you both in heartfelt prayer this morning
richard Fuller <richardfuller@gaiavoices.net>
Saint Paul, MN United States - Sunday, July 17, 2005 8:07 AM CDT

I send you love and light and please know that you are so so much in my thoughts and prayers. may love and strength surround both of you. love Elizabeth Bohun
ELizabeth Bohun <eboun@msn.com>
minneapolis, MN usa - Saturday, July 16, 2005 5:36 PM CDT

You are in my prayers.
Richard Fuller <richardfuller@gaiavoices.net>
Saint Paul, MN United States - Saturday, July 16, 2005 1:12 PM CDT

I'll be praying for you both each day over the next week from Quetico Lake, and hoping you can experience the peace and healing of that place on some level. Gail L
Gail L <glewellan@tnc.org>
- Saturday, July 16, 2005 7:42 AM CDT

Lou Ann and Elizabeth, I love you both so much. You are both in the thoughts of Lewis and myself.
Michael Norman <man@mn.rr.com>
Minneapolis, MN - Saturday, July 16, 2005 5:31 AM CDT

LouAnne and EB-
As I browse this site memories are flooding in of time spent with both of you and Elena. I had such fun with you all as a kid! Thanks for being part of my village/community.
Cancer is a real bitch. I'd be willing to bet you have handled it with both grace and humor. You are in my thoughts and prayers. All my love.

Love,
Anya <anyajane@netzero.net>
Denver, Co Denver - Friday, July 15, 2005 11:30 PM CDT

Lou Ann and EB-I keep thinking about your 20th anniversary party we had at the Meeting House. What a fine and wonderful night it was. I will always remember EB's history of your relationship as illustrated by your arguments. I laughed until I cried. Both of you are deeply in my thoughts and prayers. Lynne
Lynne Holman <Lynneholman@cs.com>
- Friday, July 15, 2005 7:34 PM CDT

Dear Lou Ann and EB,

Janet sent me your web link and I read your harrowing report of July 13th. I see your spirit in your photos, Lou Ann, your wise essence. And I see your love EB. I remember the slides we used to watch of your commitment ceremony. What a deep commitment you have made indeed. My thoughs and prayers are with you.
And if My Twin, Mark, makes it to see you today, as he mentioned, I hope he can transmit my empathy to you.

Mary La Chapelle <mlacha@slc.edu>
San Francisco, CA - Friday, July 15, 2005 1:20 PM CDT

I dont know what to say. I talked to LouAnn on Sunday and she was so sick. I think about how tired you both must be. That kind of tired that is emotional and there is no amount of rest that leaves you rested. I am glad you are in the hospital, and glad you are choosing life. I just read a book called the Two Sisters, about one sister who has cance since age 2 and one who donates parts of her body for her sister to live. There are so many stories about chemotherapy and how they both wanted to give up at times because it was so hard, and yet did not, and ultimately it was worth it. You are both fighters and I guess thats all that you can do now, and we will pray for a miracle. Love Sharon Grostphan
sharon grostephan <sblomberg@justicemail.com>
- Thursday, July 14, 2005 8:33 PM CDT

Elizavbeth
read about Louann latest condition. I am hoping and praying that this will give her the needed strength.
connie@el-colegio.org <connie@el-colegio.org>
- Thursday, July 14, 2005 11:39 AM CDT

HI You two- just checking in. Hugs and long distance support from me, Julia- Below is a love poem I think you will enjoy:

Some Kiss We Want

There is some kiss we want with
our whole lives, the touch of

spirit on the body. Seawater
begs the pearl to break its shell.

And the lilly, how passionately
it needs some wild darling! At

night, I open the window and ask
the moon to come and press its

face against mine. Breathe into
me. Close the language door and

open the love window. The moon
won�t use the door, only the window.

RUMI
Translated by Coleman Barks

Julia Archer <wildarcher1@aol.com>
Colorado Springs, CO USA - Wednesday, July 13, 2005 11:52 PM CDT

LouAnn I just got your web address and wanted to let you know that you and EB will be in my thoughts and prayers. I think of all the cancer survivors that you have 'ministered' to over the years with your beautiful sculptures I hope we can all 'minister' to you now in your journey. The goddess is with you.
Bev Dumas <bevdumas@usfamily.net>
st paul, mn ramsey - Tuesday, July 12, 2005 9:09 PM CDT

Louann, I was just told of your website, and I have been wondering for a while how you are doing. I send you all the energy that we can send from your next door neighbor Direct Benefits, Inc
Paulette Kotila <paulette@directbenefits.net>
St. Paul, MN USA - Tuesday, July 12, 2005 3:56 PM CDT

Hi. I just found out from Kathy Capra about the fierce battle you two are waging. Your journal is incredible; the metaphor of this experience as flowing down a river and riding the rapids is especially apropo. I am sending all the energy I can to both of you.
Vivian Neiger <neige001@umn.edu>
Eagan, MN Dakota - Tuesday, July 12, 2005 12:15 AM CDT

TerriAnn and I pray for your health and well being. We miss you. David A.
David A. Van Landschoot <vanland2@aol.com>
Superior, CO USA - Monday, July 11, 2005 10:56 AM CDT

Just a quick message to let you know I'm following the journal and thinking of you both. I hope things will get easier, better, brighter soon. Sending you healing energy -- Sima in New York
Sima Rabinowitz <srabinowitz@earthlink.net>
New York, NY USA - Sunday, July 10, 2005 3:32 PM CDT

Hi LouAnn and EB,
I'm back from my FLA Keys. WATSU training, sans Hurricane Dennis. I can arrange to be in St. Paul for massage/s Saturday, July 16th, 9:30 to noon. Let me know by email (is easiest) ), your interest as the week progresses.
Love, Beth
Beth Burgan <beth@centerformassage.net>
MPLS, MN - Sunday, July 10, 2005 7:52 AM CDT

Lou Ann, your spirit shines in the new photos.
Bless you.
EB, your love and your powerful patience shine in your July 8 posting.
I feel so much for you both.
Richard
Richard Fuller <richardfuller@gaiavoices.net>
Saint Paul, MN United States - Saturday, July 9, 2005 5:37 PM CDT

Hey Girls -
You are sooooo bee-u-tee-ful...it's true!!! My heart leaps across the miles and is with you. I just wish I could hug you both. Reading this and knowing of all the love being sent your way is a comfort to me - I know it's even more so for you. all my love, janet
Janet Wigfield <jwigmc2@aol.com>
Bronxville, NY USA - Thursday, July 7, 2005 9:36 PM CDT

EB and LouAnn,
What beautiful pictures--being out in the sun with flowers blooming and EB and you--lovin'. Independence Day in the sun. You both are constantly in my heart and prayers.

Mary <MaryLGooch@aol.com>
Minneapolis, MN - Tuesday, July 5, 2005 9:31 AM CDT

It has been a long time since I've seen the two of you. But Betsy told me what happened and my heart goes out to you both. I am overwhelmed at the ways you have chosen to get support and help and keep a sense of humor. Your lives are a wonderful gift to many. My thoughts and prayers are with you both; women are incredibly strong and we create miracles every day.
Janet Freer <free.wjac@verizon.net>
Annapolis, MD USA - Saturday, July 2, 2005 2:49 PM CDT

Dear LouAnn and EB,
My heart sends healing light to surround you and hold you.
You are both loved so so much!

Mary <MaryLGooch@aol.com>
Minneapolis, MN - Tuesday, June 28, 2005 4:21 PM CDT

Dear LA & EB: Wishing you both the best and easiest time of it as the chemo regimen begins. Thinking of you with healing energy, Sima and Susan in NY.
Sima Rabinowitz <srabinowitz@earthlink.net>
New Yokr, NY USA - Tuesday, June 28, 2005 4:00 PM CDT

Greetings LuAnn and Elizabeth.. I look forward to seeing you after the 4th and hopefully we can set up a time to get together.. Let me know what works for you.... love and light , Marie
Marile Larkin <mlark@bitstream.net>
Minneapolis, Mn Hennepin - Tuesday, June 28, 2005 3:30 PM CDT

Dear Elizabeth and LouAnn,
So glad to keep reading about the progress made since the surgery. Step by step, moment by moment you climb to the summit. I can only imagine the view you will both have.
All our love,
Bruce and Chris
Bruce Baldwin <bruce.baldwin@phoenixwm.com>
Manchester , CT - Tuesday, June 28, 2005 7:26 AM CDT

I'm wordless, at this point. And full of prayer for you both.
Richard Fuller <richardfuller@gaiavoices.net>
Saint Paul, MN United States - Thursday, June 23, 2005 3:34 PM CDT

EB - You write eloquently about your experience of caring for Lou Ann and I am quite moved by your awareness of her needs and of your own. You must long for the days "before, before, before" when you didn't know, when she wasn't sick, when there was life without cancer. A friend who spent twenty years caring for another who was ill with M.S. told me recently that every day he simply tried to find one thing he could truly enjoy or find pleasure in (a good meal, a few paragraphs of a good book, a short walk, the sound of the birds in the morning, etc.)and he found great comfort and sustenance in that and could keep going. I hope you find one and then another and then another, and as Lou Ann gets stronger and better, perhaps your own comforts will multiply, too. Please give Lou Ann my love and tell her I am thinking of her and hoping she gets more restless and crankier by the day! Thank you for taking the time to post the news. Love from the big city, --Sima
Sima Rabinowitz <srabinowitz@earthlink.net>
New York, NY U.S. - Tuesday, June 21, 2005 8:57 AM CDT

Thank you for your email Elizabeth. It speaks so much to the invasion of privacy of this process, and also how we have been let in to your life in a way that is so unusual that it is one none of us know how to do very well.I know this is so hard, and I also know you are so lucky to have each other and have a relationship where such giving is possible and though you surely wish it were different, we all do, what would you do with out the other. You give us all a gift who are allowed to give and care for you, and to learn about things with you that we would never know otherwise. Thank you. COngratulations LouAnn! Love Sharon
sharon Grostephan <sblomberg@justicemail.com>
- Monday, June 20, 2005 7:56 PM CDT

oxygen tanks? guess this means EB will have to give up that cigarette habit she took up while pacing the hospital hallways.

love you both xxx
Ann Potter
- Monday, June 20, 2005 3:28 PM CDT

I now live in NY, but when I was last in MN in April I learned of LouAnn's illness. I tried to send a message to wish her and EB well (through this site), but I am not clear if the message went through. So here I am checking in again. I've read the last weeks notes from EB and Moon and LouAnn and am writing in now to say that I am thinking of all of you and wishing as hard as I can for a full, complete, and bearable recovery process and for easier and more positive times ahead for all of you. Sending love from the big city -- Sima Rabinowitz
Sima Rabinowitz <srabinowitz@earthlink.net>
New York, NY USA - Thursday, June 16, 2005 3:02 PM CDT

How wonderful to hear the upbeat update! We're in Galesburg, IL (home of "Railroad Days"), driving Judy's mom back home to Maryland and we were grateful for the motel free internet to read today's news. Love and knishes to you!

Susan & Judy <jusuhouse@mn.rr.com>
Minnetonka, MN USA - Thursday, June 16, 2005 9:43 AM CDT

Yeah!!!!! What a dream......what a wonderful spirit you have:)

We are holding both of you in the light.

Love, Sue and Rich
Sue and Rich Cairn <scairn@ties2.net>
Mpls, Mn - Thursday, June 16, 2005 9:11 AM CDT

Happy Day! So glad you are (both!) feeling so much better -- Love, Carolyn
Carolyn Carr <carolynecarr@hotmail.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Thursday, June 16, 2005 0:38 AM CDT

Way to go Lou Ann,
I love that dream !!! Keep on dreaming, lady!
XOXOXO's
Gail <Shermgail@aol.com>
Ft. Lauderdale, fl - Wednesday, June 15, 2005 6:10 AM CDT

Dear Lou Ann and Elizabeth, I'm glad to read the reports of the return home... and the full night's sleep! We are always turning towards the morning, to quote some folk song whose singer/songwriter I never remember.

Love and Light to you both, each and every day.

Blessings,
Liz
Liz Oppenheimer
Minneapolis, - Monday, June 13, 2005 10:32 PM CDT

Dear Lou Ann,

It's wonderful that you are doing better and improving steadily. What a testament to your spirit and strength. Keep getting well.

Jed
Jed Lewis
Edison, NJ USA - Monday, June 13, 2005 12:51 AM CDT

Hi LouAnn & EB,
Mostly wanted to let you know I'm still out here too thinking about you, praying and wishing you well. I'm glad to hear that surgery went well & that you are recovering some strenghth.

Take care, I will probably try to call in about a week.
Bob S.

Bob Shaffer <rshaffer@wh-link.net>
Buffalo, MN - Sunday, June 12, 2005 7:36 AM CDT

Hi LouAnn,
Great to hear you are home. You are in Tamara's and Mathea's 3A.M. feeding prayers nightly and in David's thoughts often.
Tamara, David and Mathea
- Saturday, June 11, 2005 7:15 PM CDT

dear louann and eb--i'm feeling lower case tonight here at work. i was planning to visit you on my break tonight and hold your hand if you'd have wanted--but, alas you are at home and i will hold you in my heart instead. I can only wish that the relentless suffering has eased a bit and some sweetness and light have seeped into you being and bouyed your spirits and washed over you with some comfort. all my love, sonny.
sonny schneiderhan <sonnysabc@yahoo.com>
minneapolis, MN USA - Saturday, June 11, 2005 6:04 PM CDT

Hi gals,
Glad to hear that you are home! I have been worried. It is about 6am, heading to the gym in a hotel here in wonderful Newark NJ. I use that time on a treadmill to pray for you. Enjoy those kitties and the great smells and sounds of your own home. Love you! Barb
Barb Dieckman <bdieckman@csc.com>
Warnner, NH - Saturday, June 11, 2005 5:21 AM CDT

Dear Lou Ann and EB,
So glad to hear you are both home! On a table in our house is the beautiful pot Lou Ann made, which EB gave to us at our wedding. We see it all the time, and think of you two. Know that we are holding you in the Light - Carolyn and Jonathan
Carolyn Carr <carolynecarr@hotmail.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Saturday, June 11, 2005 2:05 AM CDT

Dear LouAnn and EB,
Maria has been keeping me informed of your courageous lives over the past few months and had just sent me the URL of this website. The energy of your "being there" shines through all of it. With loving best wishes for a steady gentle healing.

Linda LaBove <labo4@earthlink.net>
Santa Fe, NM - Friday, June 10, 2005 11:48 PM CDT

I am so glad you are home. You both are always in my thoughts and prayers.

Mary Gooch <MaryLGooch@aol.com>
Minneapolis, MN - Friday, June 10, 2005 10:02 PM CDT

What relief that you can come home Lou Ann, and the surgical procedure is behind you! Great that BOTH of you get to sleep in your own bed under your roof. We're so relieved you are at this place now. Good work, both of you. Sending good wishes for a gentle, fast, recovery. Love, Judy F.
Judy Fairbrother
Saint Paul, MN 55106 - Friday, June 10, 2005 9:09 AM CDT

Dear LouAnn and Elizabeth,
I somehow just found out about caringbridge and took the last couple of days reading and becoming more and more in awe of your love, your strength, and your many caring friends. Please know that Chris and I send our most positive thoughts and hopes to you both every day. Thank you for all your inspiration. We are in your debt.
Love, Chris & Bruce
Bruce Baldwin <bruce.baldwin@phoenixwm.com>
Manchester, CT - Friday, June 10, 2005 8:49 AM CDT

WooooooHooooooooo!

Can't wait to see you both again.

Love love
Pat <pfarrell@d.umn.edu>
Duluth, MN - Thursday, June 9, 2005 12:33 AM CDT

Hi. Peg again. Lou Ann, it goes without saying that you are going to do everything you can to heal over the next few weeks. If things don't go well, it won't be because you aren't trying hard enough. Many people, including MK and I, are going to be with you and those you love in many different ways no matter what happens. Love, Peg
Peg <pegthompson@talkinghelps.info>
Afton, MN USA - Wednesday, June 8, 2005 3:28 PM CDT

Hello dears,
I am back from Kentucky and have been keeping up with the updates. So glad the tumors are OUT! You are both in my heart and mind always. I will visit again as soon as you want. I love you.
Pat <pfarrell@d.umn.edu>
- Tuesday, June 7, 2005 12:14 AM CDT

Mary and I pray for you two every day. So many setbacks. Such an amazing show of spiritual strength and courage. The two of you have been so good to me and I admit I feel quite feeble trying to find the words that might encourage you to fight more. We love you and look forward to seeing you. Full recovery is the sunny side of the hill you climb. Love, M&M
Mark Nuebel <msnuebel@mac.com>
newport, mN united States - Tuesday, June 7, 2005 9:51 AM CDT

Dear Lou Ann,

I just heard from Greg about your illness. I have so many feelings, but the one that stands out most is the warmth that I feel for you and the intense desire for you to be well again and to get through this ordeal. It sounds as if you have wonderful love and support in this hard time and that you are emotionally strong yourself and full of faith. My thoughts and hopes are with you, Elizabeth, Moon, and other members of your family (Mark, too) who are sharing your struggle with you everyday. I wish you continued life and the ability to continue your work and love.
Jed Lewis
Edison, NJ USA - Monday, June 6, 2005 2:03 PM CDT

Dear LouAnn,
I am so glad you came through surgery so well!. You have an incredible spirit. Know that you, EB and Moon are being carried in my heart and that I am constantly sending love and healing thoughts your way. Thank you for allowing me to share in your courageous journey through your updates on �CaringBridge�.

Connie Nickel <cmnickel@earthlink.net>
Edina, mn - Saturday, June 4, 2005 9:52 AM CDT

Hey E.B. I love you, and Lou Ann and Moon even though I haven't yet met them. : ) We'll talk soon. Prayers on....
Leanna Nelson <leannaandron@earthlink.net>
Eden Prairie, MN 55344 - Saturday, June 4, 2005 9:00 AM CDT

Truly this is a profile in courage....It is a privilege to be able to peek in this window and see the love and courage displayed by all those in the wonderful community that surround you both. Thanks. You're in my thoughts and prayers.
Julie Olson <julie.olson@district196.org>
- Friday, June 3, 2005 4:48 PM CDT

My love surrounds you with the light of healing and holds you, my dear friend, LouAnn in ICU. EB and Moon, you are in my heart sending you streams of peace and hope.

Mary <MaryLGooch@aol.com>
Minneapolis, MN - Friday, June 3, 2005 1:05 PM CDT

Lou Ann and EB - Yeah! The surgery is over. Now onto more healing. With LouAnn's sense of humor that in itself is a huge healing tool. I received an Ovarian Candle from the Women's Ovarian Cancer Resource Center Group and we are going to continue to burn that for healing energy for you both. You are in our thoughts and prayers. Brenda and Kathy
Brenda Douville <caprakat@infionline.net>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Friday, June 3, 2005 11:02 AM CDT

Lou,
I am proud of you. I am proud of both of you! Choosing life is such an athletic challenge. We who love you can stand on the side lines and cheer, but you work each breath, (tube or no tube) into an incredible accomplishment. Congrats on each step to health.
You are deeply loved.
Barbo <bdieckman@csc.com>
Warner, NH - Friday, June 3, 2005 9:33 AM CDT

I'm so grateful for your successful surgery and pray for your full recovery. You and EB and Moon and your friends and family are in my thoughts and prayers.
All my love,
Janet Wigfield <jwigmc2@aol.com>
Bronxville, NY - Thursday, June 2, 2005 9:10 PM CDT

We have just read that you came through today's surgery successfully and send a prayer of thanks for that. You both are in our thoughts more than ever and we shall continue sending prayers and positive energy.

KJ and Miriam
mpls, mn hennepin - Thursday, June 2, 2005 6:21 PM CDT

LouAnn and EB,
Our love and healing thoughts are with you.
Margo & Cindy
- Thursday, June 2, 2005 5:10 PM CDT

LouAnn and EB,
LouAnn -I have been touching the pot you made, its symbols calling to a place before, time opens and slows, may you both dance in this mind's place and find strength.
With thoughts and hope-Karen
Karen Lee Davis <davis136@tc.umn.edu>
Minneapolis, MN - Thursday, June 2, 2005 1:47 PM CDT

I send you both thoughts and prayers of peace, love and healing. Much metta!
Malva
Malva Cohen <malvacohen@aol.com>
Minneapolis, MN - Wednesday, June 1, 2005 8:58 PM CDT

Prayers, prayers, and more prayers to both of you. I know you are getting through this with as much grace, humor, and tenderness as you can muster--and then some.
Blessings,
Liz Oppenheimer
Liz Oppenheimer
Minneapolis, - Tuesday, May 31, 2005 10:39 PM CDT

E.B. and Lou Ann,

You two are living proof of how we keep going despite hardship. I am so sorry you're having to go through this and continue to hold you in my thoughts. Relief is on the way with the surgery! Best to you both.

Your friend in Courage work.

Lisa Rowe
Lisa Rowe <lrowe@edenpr.org>
- Tuesday, May 31, 2005 9:57 PM CDT

Dear Lou Ann--congratulations on having ribs! Thank you for this wonderful story, that sends me out the door with a smile this morning. I hope you have songs in your heart today and a respite from pain. Love, Susan
Susan De Vries <sdevries54@yahoo.com>
Saint Paul, MN United States - Friday, May 27, 2005 7:32 AM CDT

What a wonderful way to keep in touch. I didn't know about caringbridge. Thanks you so much Mary Rose for telling me about this web page. I love the pictures!

Lou Ann and EB, I think of you everyday. James and I will be with you especially on Fridays. James sends his love and Best Wishes.

Love and Kisses,

Mary Beth Young
Mary Beth Young <marybeth young@msn.com>
St Paul, MN USA - Tuesday, May 24, 2005 10:26 AM CDT

Lou Ann and EB - I hold you in my sacred intentions this day as I just read this about angels....I know the two of you have many earth angels - or "seen" friends...this is about our "unseen" friends. I always call upon my ancestors along with the angels as I believe they are just waiting for assignments. Sending you courage and healing - with love, Joyce Eckes

Divine Guardians
Using Angels For Protection
While many cannot see them, the universe is nonetheless filled with angels - here for many purposes. Angels can be called upon to help comfort us, guide us, and to help protect us. People who are receptive to spiritual forces can sense or even physically feel the protective presence of angels, but anyone, even those who have never before received angelic protection, can access it. All we need to do is ask. Angels are our willing protectors and expect nothing in return.

Asking for protection or guidance needn't be complex and there is no limit to the number of angels you can have to help you. You may wish to meditate or say a prayer, but all that's necessary is a direct request. Reach out with your heart and mind, and voice your request out loud. Ask that angels surround and protect you, your family, your home,or your car, whatever it is that you want help protecting. It's helpful to visualize what your new guardian angels are doing. See them forming a protective ring around you if you are scared, or see them standing ready at your home's doors and windows while you are away. Angelic protection can extend beyond the physical and into the realm of emotion, if that is what you desire.

If you're unsure whether you have successfully called upon an angel, try tuning out your senses and feeling with your heart. If you are receptive to it, there is a chance that you will feel your companion angels as warmth. Be open and receptive and practice being aware of them - remember that if you ask for one, there will always be a divine presence watching over you.

Joyce Eckes <horsejoyherbs@aol.com>
- Monday, May 23, 2005 9:34 AM CDT

Hi LouAnn ad E.B. Heard the news from Brenda and also about this e-mail connection, what a good idea! I'll use it to keep in touch and send you all the best wishes. My heart is with you both, Hilary (Northland)
Hilary <HSandall@aol.com>
- Sunday, May 22, 2005 7:04 PM CDT

LouAnn and EB,
The peonies you gave me last year are coming up. My thoughts are with the both of you.
Mary <MaryLGooch@aol.com>
Minneapolis, MN USA - Sunday, May 22, 2005 6:25 PM CDT

Hey you two-I just want you to know my thoughts and prayers are with you. Love, Lynne
Lynne Holman <Lynneholman@cs.com>
MInneapolis, MN - Thursday, May 19, 2005 9:59 PM CDT

Hey you gals. Betsy & I are thinking of you over here today on Loring Park. Saw a loon on the lake yesterday. And today the mallard babies are out on a family flotilla w/mom & dad.
Meanwhile, new mulch is being spread on the Loring garden.

The earth is regenerating, and we all belong to it.
Sending you both loads of love. xx-AP

Ann Potter <ap@annpotter.net>
Minneapolis, - Thursday, May 19, 2005 12:32 AM CDT

Hi Lou Ann,
Thinking about you always & beaming my most positive thoughts to you.
Much love, Gail
Gail <Shermgail@aol.com>
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA - Thursday, May 19, 2005 6:36 AM CDT

Hi you two. Just want you to know that Mary Kay and I are thinking of you every day and asking that sustaining and healing energy be pouring down on you.
Peg <pegthompson@talkinghelps.info>
- Monday, May 16, 2005 1:28 PM CDT

Hi LooAnn and EB- LouAnn, I just viewed your photos- you do look beautiful- remember that Saturday Night Live thing that went something like: "It's not how you feel, it's how you look, and you look marvelous!" Hmmm. Love Julia
Julia Archer <wildarcher1@aol.com>
Who Knows?, - Sunday, May 15, 2005 10:39 AM CDT

It's well past the time when those eight of us were packed in LouAnn's hospital room to sing (just call us "The Vitals"), but I had wanted to post and say how well you two did in receiving our love so graciously, whether with tears or laughter. It makes it easier to give when the love that is there is welcomed. I'm glad for the Pranksters and the Mystery Flower Givers and the Recipients of your Gratitudes. We are all one, aren't we?!

Blessings,
Liz
Liz Oppenheimer
Minneapolis, MN - Saturday, May 14, 2005 9:11 PM CDT

Dear LouAnn and EB,
I'm so happy the hospital stay has brought some relief, for you both. I've been keeping up with the ups and downs through Susan, who talks with Moon daily. Your journey, while unique in itself, brings up many vivid memories and feelings for me of the journey I shared with Susan last year. My thoughts and prayers are with you daily. May a lotus bloom continually in your hearts.

Judy Ingram <jusu@mn.rr.com>
Mpls., - Wednesday, May 11, 2005 8:39 PM CDT

Dear LouAnn and Elizabeth,
It's very special to be able to go to caringbridge and feel informed and a part of your struggle. Woody and I send you our best wishes and energy. Know that you are in our thoughts.
Mary and Woody Emlen <maryemlen@comcast.net>
Denver , CO - Wednesday, May 11, 2005 6:36 PM CDT

Dear LA and EB,
I am moved and mesmerized by your individual and collective capacities for experiencing this trial in such clear, focused and exquisitely balanced ways.
you have my ongoing respect and thanks for your willingness to instruct by example at such a moment. deep regards, Debra Roth
debra roth <debraroth@speakeasy.net>
new york, ny usa - Sunday, May 8, 2005 12:55 AM CDT

EB and Lou Ann,

What a time you are having! Wish I were closer to offer big hugs but I send them to you this way. Took a walk today with my dog, Boots, in the Carleton Arboretum. Saw a gold finch and several blue birds. Knew you would both have loved this, so I let them wing my thoughts towards you. Think of you often and look forward to getting up to the Cities after my trip to Kentucky next week.

I send to you both one of my favorite blessings (and, yes, I did change the pronoun):

May the road rise up to meet you,
May the wind be always at your back,
May the sun shine warm upon your face,
And the rain fall soft upon your fields,
And until we meet again,
May God hold you in the palm of Her hand.

---- - an old Irish verse

Love, Elizabeth
Elizabeth Hutchins (from CTT) <eoh@rconnect.com>
Northfield, MN - Friday, May 6, 2005 11:06 PM CDT

EB and Lou Ann, What a blessing it was to sing to you both last night in the midst of chaos and laughter. Thank you for asking me to organize this. That was a blessing, too. Lou Ann, you look really good. I enjoyed your smile and enjoyed watching you take all of us in last night. All my love, Jeanne
Jeanne Burns
Minneapolis, MN United States - Friday, May 6, 2005 11:01 PM CDT

EB and Lou Ann
Wow, I'm thinking of the new song by Anna Nalick...just breathe..hold your head in your hands and just breathe...very hard moments and yet, as I read, very precious moments, sharing song, reading, and friends.
I am sending intentional healing power to you both.
Lisa (from CTT)
Lisa Rowe <lrowe@edenpr.org>
- Friday, May 6, 2005 9:26 PM CDT

Hi, you two. Congratulations on your anniversary! We're thinking of you and praying for you as you walk this journey together. Love, Peg and Mary Kay
Peg and Mary Kay <peg.thompson@pressenter.com>
Afton, MN USA - Monday, May 2, 2005 10:02 AM CDT

Dear Lou Ann,
Jeanne Wolff Bernstein told me about your illness. Your friends from PINC send their best wishes. I remember so well your warmth, empathy and intelligence when I was there a couple years ago. I wish you peace and strength.
Fondly, Victor BonfilioTuesday, April 19, 2005 12:53 AM CDT

EB & Lou Ann,

Thank you so much for sharing your journey with us, and letting us walk with you. It is a privilege.

Yes! Hair loss can be fun! Thanks for posting the pictures. It's nice to see Lou Ann's bright smile, even though all the yuckiness.

Many, many blessings and prayers are coming your way.
Jeanne Burns
Minneapolis, MN United States - Monday, April 18, 2005 9:51 PM CDT

Dear Lou Ann and EB,

We are sorry to hear about your diagnosis. Our thoughts and prayers are with you. Please come by and visit the next time you are in the Washington/Baltimore Area.

Cousin Steve and Holly

Steve Schotz <steveholly@comcast.net>
Clarksville, MD USA - Monday, April 18, 2005 9:27 PM CDT

Hi you two. Funny movies really helped me a lot when I was dealing with cancer...the ones I remember most were Best in Show and Miss Congeniality. Kind of a pair, in a way. Funny in a stupid way, the most effective for cancer. Also I asked people to send me funny emails and I got LOTS of them, several a day, and many of them made me laugh out loud.

EB, our wisest words for you are to remember what they say on the plane about putting on your own oxygen mask before assisting others.

Thanks for sharing your journey with us all. It means a lot. You're both in our prayers and will be as this unfolds.

Love to you both.
Peg and Mary Kay <peg.thompson@pressenter.com>
Afton, MN USA - Friday, April 15, 2005 8:34 PM CDT

Luann & EB, I finally found "your site", thanks to Moon. Too many years have passed since we've spoken. Was saddened to learn of your diagnosis Luann, and hope that your chemo response continues to be good. You hang in there girl, it gets better with time. Hugs to you both.

Bob Wempner <cucui@comcast.net>
Placitas, NM - Friday, April 15, 2005 1:17 PM CDT

You are both writing the most wonderful journal entries. I feel like I'm getting to know you better through your writing. The words are heartfelt and honest. I find them helpful in my own living, and they help open all of our hearts to you.

Chris Curtiss <ccurtiss98@yahoo.com>
- Thursday, April 14, 2005 12:25 AM CDT

Hi honeys two,

I've been holding you in my thoughts all week and hoping that that is the way you spell it and not "all weak."

Love
Heron
Heron Diana <walker1@visi.com>
- Thursday, April 14, 2005 8:55 AM CDT

Hi EB and Lou Ann,
I am sending a lot of love and prayers your way tonight.
Jenny Larson
Minneapolis, - Monday, April 11, 2005 8:37 PM CDT

EB and Lou Ann,

This is truly Courage work...and I send healing focused energy your way. The strength you have is incredible...and the way you're noticing spring this year is impactful. I will hold you in my thoughts each day.
Lisa
Lisa Rowe <lrowe@edenpr.org>
- Sunday, April 10, 2005 8:43 PM CDT

Dear LouAnn and EB,

I was so sorry to hear of your diagnosis. I can't imagine what you must be going through. You are in my thoughts daily, even though I haven't called. I am wonderful at cleaning anything; ask Betsy Hage and Belinda Lewis. I am a terrible cook, so we won't go there. Good funny movies: Back to the Future, Jewel of the Nile, Say Anything,
Celeste Yanisch <yanisch-perron@mmmpcc.org>
St. Paul,, M USA - Thursday, April 7, 2005 11:00 AM CDT

Dear Lou Ann and EB,

Today was the first day of checking out your website. We hold you very close to our hearts and send all the good energy we can your way as you progress through these difficult days.

The northwoods are ALMOST clear of snow, the river has broken wide open and is pounding (you can almost feel it in the house). Our deer herd has decreased (YEA!) and trust they are finding some nibbles in the forest. New grass popping up, we can't wait to start gardening.

We're with you, much love to you both,

Rita and Diane and Sasha

Rita Bergstedt & Diane Daniels <girls2@cpinternet.com>
Duluth, MN USA - Monday, April 4, 2005 8:24 PM CDT

Lou Ann & EB: you are both in my thoughts and prayers. As I was reading the notes to you, I want to add my vote for a good movie - Calendar Girls as well as the new one Because of Winn Dixie (actually meant for children, but adults seem to love it also). I am glad that so many friends hold you both in the light!
Judith and I will be traveling to Turkey and Israel in a couple of weeks and will keep you in our thoughts.
Love, Olly
Olly Staneslow <ollystan@spacestar.net>
St. Paul, MN - Saturday, April 2, 2005 2:51 PM CST

Hi Girls. Note to LuAnn- new (?)website for your entertainment:epicurious.com Note to EB- Surely 'oneliness'must be added to the general lexicon, or become a book title! Yes, accidental brilliance is the best!
Love, Julia
Julia archer <wildarcher1@aol.com>
Port Charlotte, FL USA - Saturday, April 2, 2005 1:51 PM CST

EB and LouAnn -

I heard about your cancer, Lou Ann, because I'm in art class with Moon. My thoughts and prayers are with all of you as you take this journey. May you be blessed with all the love, support and courage that is needed. And I hope those pretty little Holland mints from the coop can still do their magic in the low moments!

Best wishes, Susan
Susan Galeota
- Saturday, April 2, 2005 10:36 AM CST

Hello EB and LouAnn -
The God's Must Be Crazy and its sequel are some of my favorite funny movies - although there is a subcommentary about the craziness of war. Calendar Girls also has some wonderful laughs. Mary Oliver's poetry is wonderfully healing. Oldies music can be great (107.9 on your fm dial is all 60s and 70s stuff)... growing bulbs on the windowsill, hot baths, foot rubs, reading Winnie the Pooh out loud (especially the story of Pooh sticks)and maybe some dairy wheat coffee... Take care and much love - Maggie
Maggie O'Connor <ocomer@hickorytech.net>
Mankato, MN USA - Thursday, March 31, 2005 7:26 PM CST

EB and Lou Ann,
You asked for something that might make you laugh out loud. I am fond of the Topp Twins, a lesbian twin sister duo from New Zealand, who yodel, sing, and do comedy. They are very silly and funny and I will send you a copy of their video. I also like the Full Monty for a good belly laugh.
Love from the North Shore,
Pat
Pat <pfarrell@d.umn.edu>
Duluth, MN USA - Thursday, March 31, 2005 11:51 AM CST

Lou Ann and EB,

Just a note to wish you well in this challenge you are going through together. Thanks for sharing your journal. You are strong and loving; and have given much joy and wisdom to those around you over the years. Good for you for accepting help from others now! Thanks for giving me the opportunity to add to the good wishes of others.
Karen Thompson <kft@uslink.net>
Saint Paul, MN - Thursday, March 31, 2005 10:08 AM CST

Dear Lou Ann and EB -- Even as we reach out to you two with our love we find encouragement from the spirit and courage you show us in such a difficult time. Much love -- Frank and Raquel
Frank H. Wood <fwood@umn.edu>
Minneapolis, MN - Thursday, March 31, 2005 9:26 AM CST

Lou Ann and EB,
Our thoughts and prayers to both of you. Carol and I are going through a somewhat similar "adventure" so we both know the moment by moment array of feelings...scary to wondrous. I am on disability retirement due to a damaged liver...standard medical practice is a liver transplant and I'm working with a liver specialist. Also seeing a homeopath and doing energy work. I cannot know, Lou Ann, what you are specifically are going through with your chemo...but I, too, am reading Pema Chodron's book and finding it very helpful.
I also know how simply exhausting it is for Carol to witness this, take it in and try to be there for me. EB, take good care of yourself. It is hard to take in all the love given and it is an unexpected practice that has come out of this. One portion of a poem from a Rennaisance poet helps me practice this: "We are here on this earth as angels with one wing. It takes the embrace of others to truly fly." We keep you both in our thoughts and prayers.
Pat Mehigan and Carol Foth <cjfpkm@earthlink.net>
St. Paul, MN USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 0:19 AM CST

Hey LA and EB,
Just to let you know that there is a group of Buddhists in the Guang Fu Jiang Temple outside of Shanghai (where Julian's grandparents go) who have you in their daily thoughts and prayers. Be well, Greg
Greg Jones <greg47716@yahoo.com>
Shanghai, China - Monday, March 28, 2005 8:25 PM CST

Dear LouAnn,
I've never met you, but my heart goes out to both of you. Many years ago EB found me and my son (then 5 years old), looking in the window fo an artist collective store on Grand Avenue. She encouraged us that it was "okay to go in" -- that even small children were welcome. After we had been here for a while, I had a bit of discretionary income and a twig chair was our first "frivolous" purchase. That twig chair still graces our home and has more often than not been our winter holiday/christmas tree - much to the delight of my recyling soul. EB's encouragement hovers around this physical thing in our home. I sense she is hovering around you. Bless you both,
Barbara
Barbara Beltrand <beltrand@net-info.com>
St Paul, MN USA - Sunday, March 27, 2005 10:03 AM CST

Hey there, LouAnn and EB, from North Carolina.
You both are in my prayers and thoughts.
Peace and Love.
Jim <jimdeming@earthlink.net>
Raleigh, NC USA - Saturday, March 26, 2005 8:18 PM CST

I turn to "Things Fall Apart" all the time! Even we gardeners need to be reminded there is no solid ground and there is only the present. And in the present, I know you two are thought about, are being prayed for,and havng healing energy sent your way. All my love-Lynne
Lynne Holman <Lynneholman@cs.com>
MInneapolis, MN USA - Saturday, March 26, 2005 6:22 PM CST

EB, I love 'oneliness'! Reading your entry brought the (Holly Near?) song to mind - 'We're gonna keep on walking forward, keep on walking forward, keep on walking forward, never turning back, never turning back...' In my prayers I see the softest of blankets wrapping the two of you.

In oneliness with you,

Maggie <ocomer@hickorytech.net>
Mankato, MN USA - Saturday, March 26, 2005 7:28 AM CST

Hi you two lovely women. Jeanne and I are spending some time together with one another, reviewing emails and websites that are significant to us. We reviewed EB's recent post here and sighed as we recollected some similar experiences we've had... with cancer and "oneliness."

It sounds like the Comforter is with you, close, and you are receiving love and nurture with open hearts. Thanks for keeping us updated as you are able. No need to push yourself to do so, of course. Know that you remain in our thoughts and in our hearts.
Blessings,
Liz & Jeanne
Minneapolis, MN - Thursday, March 24, 2005 9:32 PM CST