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Journal entry by Steven McGee

Valerian and the City of 1000 planets movie: LINK

@ 1:01 Tammy lived this truth quietly and selflessly:
V: Oh, come on, this has nothing to do with love.

L: That’s where you’re wrong. Love is more powerful than anything else, Valerian. It breaks all rules and laws and overpowers any army or government. Just look at her. For one second, put yourself in her position. She lost all of her people and her child. And she’s willing to forgive. That’s real love. It’s the trust you place in someone else and… I thought I could be that someone else for you. But clearly…https://youtu.be/s0m9sjNc81M
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Journal entry by Steven McGee

While listening to a podcast while walking, one of my main activities that I enjoy, the speaker mentioned the covenant of the Rainbow... my special ability, if I have one, is associating seemingly disparate ideas, signs, symbols, text that I integrate into a checklist or patchwork quilt (that few understand or take the time to attempt to understand)...  see previous posts about Sacred Contracts (Carolyn Myss book), the project Tammy and I worked on (main use case is establishing an ecologically sustainable economic heartbeat).  See the rainbow postings... various..  is it all coincidental?  For my part I think not.  

LINK

Journal entry by Steven McGee

See the "Over the Rainbow" post on Simple Wins Concepts LLC's site posted this morning: LINK

RAINBOW WARRIOR

Tammy was in RAINBOW and was a Worthy Advisor. Tammy's  father was a member of the Blackfoot Indian Tribe -- speaking of RAINBOW Colors. 

Tammy was among the most selfless, bravest of the braves in accepting her assignment to this Earth School.  Her courage and sacrifice (Buffalo) will be honored and remembered.  Warriors of the Rainbow -- IT'S TIME: LINK

 

The International Order of the Rainbow for Girls (IORG) is a Masonic youth service organization which teaches leadership training through community service. Girls (ages 11–20/21) learn about the value of charity and service through their work and involvement with their annual local and Grand (state or country) service projects. LINK 

 

Coincidentally, while relaxing in the pool today -- the day of this post hours after I posted the Rainbow / Rainbow Warrior's post to the Simple Wins Concepts website, the song "Over the Rainbow" played on a contemporary 80's music radio station playing poolside.  "Over the Rainbow" is a song from 1939: LINK:  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Over_the_Rainbow

Somewhere over the rainbow way up high
There's a land that I heard of once in a lullaby
Somewhere over the rainbow skies are blue
And the dreams that you dare to dream really do come true.

Someday I'll wish upon a star
And wake up where the clouds are far
Behind me
Where troubles melt like lemon drops
Away above the chimney tops
That's where you'll find me


Somewhere over the rainbow bluebirds fly
Birds fly over the rainbow.
Why then, oh, why can't I?



Journal entry by Steven McGee

11:11 April 16, 2018

The song playing as I pulled away from the house for the first time following Tammy's passing was "No one ever is to blame" by Howard Jones.  Keeping in mind Tammy and I both ran Cross - Country -- a sport said to attract those who can't compete in other sports by many... coincidentally, I bought a cobalt air compressor today... the picture that was returned through binging is show below -- recalling around the time of Tammy's passing, the water heater in the house exploded upwards from the top -- something that the installation technician said he's never seen before... coincidentally

Lyrics

You can look at the menu, but you just can't eat

You can feel the cushion, but you can't have a seat

You can dip your foot in the pool, but you can't have a swim

You can feel the punishment, but you can't commit the sin

And you want her, and she wants you

We want everyone

And you want her and she wants you

No one, no one, no one ever is to blame

You can build a mansion, but you just can't live in it

You're the fastest runner but you're not allowed to win

Some break the rules, and let you cut the cost

The insecurity is the thing that won't get lost

And you want her, and she wants you

We want everyone

And you want her and she wants you

No one, no one, no one ever is to blame

You can see the summit but you can't reach it

It's the last piece of the puzzle but you just can't make it fit

Doctor says you're cured but you still feel the pain

Aspirations in the clouds but your hopes go down the drain

And you want her, and she wants you

We want everyone

And you want her and she wants you

No one, no one, no one ever is to blame

No one ever is to blame

No one ever is to blame

Songwriters: Howard Jones

© Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd.

For non-commercial use only.

Data From: LyricFind

 

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Journal entry by Steven McGee

April 15th 03:25 AM 2018: Last entry from the "last, least among you" / scribe / husband / friend:

Tarot cards are a fascination of mine and being in denial and confused because Tammy had begun "peeping, peaking" yet she was still (autonomic-ally) drinking water, I performed a Tarot reading. I carefully choose a card asking to be given the truth of the situation (I'm an Aquarius, Aquarius Rising Truth seeker).  I carefully passed my hands slowly over the cards asking to be guided to the card that would reveal the truth.  Additionally, Facade dot com does reversals so I actually did two readings.  I drew the Death card.  However, the card was reversed.  Further the card was paired with the ten of swords in these readings.  Dr. Susan Greenberg called the following morning (see prior reading) and asked if she was in pain.  I said that I did not think so because of the cluster of lesions the X-rays revealed at the top of the spine with a lesion inside the spinal column that was "inoperable".  This lesion was shielded by bone and protected by the sealed off nature of the spinal fluid.  

Reversed Death Tarot Card Meanings. Death is a card of transformation and new life, and typically shows a need to start completely over by letting go of the past. Death reversed typically reflects that you are on the verge of major change but for some reason, you are resisting making that change.

Aeclectic Tarot: Ah, the Death Card. Signifies an end to something, a time of grieving with the hint that there will be something new to take the place of this lost thing in the future. Rebirth is at the other end of this tunnel, but a dark tunnel must be traversed. Reversed?

1) Opposite: The easiest reversal here is to say that something does not come to an end, or it does not die. But this may not be as good a thing as it sounds. Ever have a favorite TV show? You watch it over three seasons, it hits a pinnacle of being brilliant and wonderful...and then it starts to go down. And as it sinks and gets worse, and as it stretches out you begin to wish it had ended after that pinnacle. Sometimes, things need to come to a blessed end. Anyone who's had someone in the hospital, alive but not alive, holding to life but not living, knows that "not death" isn't a desired thing. Not death keeps people from grieving, and from starting over again when done. It just stretches out a "not-life."

2) Blocked: Unlike the Opposite, I would say that the Blocked interpretation does allow for the death or ending of something. The real energy of the card here is about that time of grief and nadir that leads to re-birth. If this is blocked, then the querent can't grieve. They can't face or relieve the pain of loss. They remain at one end of the tunnel, refusing or unable to transverse it.
Death Reversed: http://www.aeclectic.net/tarot/card-meanings/reversed/death.shtml  LINK
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See the last entry... Coldplay' Miracle video. Tammy and I also grew up with railroad tracks in our back yards.
Tammy left this world next to a set of railroad tracks running north / south -- like the dogsleds were running in Reverend Kathy Grave's images during one of our earliest sessions -- see magnetic pole reversals (Tammy being the heart and me the Beacon

Ten of Swords:  When the 10 appears, however, it is a clear signal to be careful about where you put your trust

Linda "The Psychic" Shields "Trust no one"

The Ten of Swords reversed indicates a painful ending which must occur for there to be growth and regeneration. The suit of Swords is the suit of thoughts, plans, and attitudes, and this card is very appropriate in the area of mental transformations.

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Journal entry by Steven McGee

11: 33 PM April 14th, 2018: One thing Tammy and I shared in common despite being opposites on the Zodiac wheel and in life is that we both ran high school cross country. Tonight I repeated again the affirmation I have arrived at to honor Tammy and her profound Sacred Contract. On the morning after her passing, her Oncologist Dr. Susan Greenberg called and said "no matter what trash was dropped over her head, she just kept on smiling".  I responded automatically as if the words were not my own "Tammy accomplished what she came her to do" Tonight, a little voice told me that I needed to play the Coldplay song "Paradise". This song led me to another more poignant song "Miracles" by Coldplay.  The video includes scenes from the movie "Unbroken" that we watched together.  Miracles by Coldplay begins with these words:   "I've made it this far and refused to give up because all my life I had always finished the race". Quote by Louis Zamperini. Coincidentally, I had reposted this montage from the movie Toy Story 3 recently (see attached)

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Journal entry by Steven McGee

Healers / energy medicine practitioners cite emotions as triggers / contributing factors for dis-ease (disease). 

Coincidentally,  while the visiting nurse and the social worker were checking on Tammy for what would be the last time and citing that Tammy was "peaking" "peeping" (think of peek a boo without seeing) during the late morning the day of Tammy's passing, the hot water tank was arriving for replacement.  The hot water tank installer remarked that he never saw a hot water tank explode up and out from the tank from the top before....

Click for "the rest of the story": https://scribd.com/document/375652904/Tammer-the-Hammer-The-Heart-Beacon

LINK

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Journal entry by Steven McGee

Tammy Sue Lee's cremation has / will occur in Libertyville New Jersey. She will be profoundly missed. 

Tammy has a new life / I have my life back -- win - win 

Shaman, Circle of the Sacred Earth DRUMMING Circle 10 April 2018:


Reverend Kathy Graves e-mail: “Hi, at drum last night called in on Tammy’s Native Ancestors and helpers. Was told they will come to her in her dreams to guide her and direct her. She must lite a candle every day and rattle as she sits there. It can be a plastic bottle with dry rice if need be… but do it… welcome them and thank them.”


R. Kathy

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April 13th 2018 Addendum: meeting Tammy's brother Vern in the Double Tree Hotel lobby, Vern heard on the news that the whales were migrating south early this year.  

On the trip to Richmond on Highway 301, I saw a Hammer Transport truck and a Beacon truck.  Stopping at a gas station, I saw a Reliable Energy Management Truck.

Thank you for all your life lessons, infinite patience, compassion, and unconditional love Tammy Sue Lee.
You are an old soul

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Journal entry by Steven McGee

This website is for Tammy Sue Lee McGee's lion pride.  Being former military US Army Signal Corps, I thought this "smart push, warrior pull" strategy to provide updates was a smart thing -- her primary care giver / husband Steve

April 7th 2018: the oxygen tank adapter came today and is in use.  Tammy drank half a 1 gram of sugar per container protein shake last night about 3:30 AM and a half of fruit / vegetable energy drink this morning. She took her mucus medications and a few supplement pills as previously described.  She is sleeping and is on O2 -- without the humidify bottle because the nurse pointed out that her lungs are already moist with the mucus.
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