If only…..

If only I could turn back time I wouldn’t put off things until later.  No more next year I’ll do it, or next time. No more, I have plenty of time to do it later. Do it now.  

If only I knew my time in this life would end early I would have taken that trip to Tuscany, now it’s too late.  So take that trip now. While you can. 

If only I could have seen that all my years of training paid off, physically and mentally, and realized my body wasn’t perfect but to be happy with the way I looked.  If only I could have that back I would never again complain about dimples on my butt or a small pooch in my belly.  I’m watching my body waste away before my eyes.  If you can workout, go do it. Do it for your health. 

If only I had more time with my husband to grow old with him and do all the things we said we would do when we retire.  He has been through more than anyone could sign up for.  But he loves me unconditionally. Through good and bad. 

If only I had more time with my girls (my nieces) Jada and Julia to see them get married and have families of there own. If only I could be there when they want to call me or need advise. 

If only I had more Christmas’s, my favorite time of year.  I love all the decorations, the smells, Family time, being able to give to those I love.  And most important, to celebrate our Jesus in heaven for being born and dying for us, giving us this life.  He forgave us so we could live. 

If only to have more birthdays to never complain about getting older.  Or seeing the new wrinkles which make us wise and experienced. 

If only I had more time to snuggle with my puppies. The unconditional love they give you. 

If only there was a cure for cancer.  So many people wouldn’t have to suffer and lose loved ones. 

If only I could touch you and make you realize how precious everyday is and when faced with your mortality you realize there’s not much time left.  Forget about the small stuff, look at all the great things in your life.  Find the good. 

If only you could forgive more people that hurt you.  trust that God will take care of you.  Ask Him to help you forgive. Trust in Him always. 

If only we could be happy in bad times and not wait until good times to be happy.  

If only we could all love more in this world of violence and hate.  Love is the greatest of all. 

If only I had more time. Don’t wait, do all the things you want to do now. Life is precious. Cherish the ones you love and say I love you.  Call your mom and dad if they are still living, they just want to hear from you and not be forgotten.  Forgive them for anything you may be angry about.  They did their best. 

If only I gave more. Since being sick I have been overwhelmed with people that give so much. Cooking meals for us, taking me to lunch, offering to help In anyway possible. I am forever grateful. There are so many good people in this world. 

If only I had hair again I would never complain about it being curly and having to straighten it every day. Curly or straight, if only I could have hair.

Each day of life is a gift., life can be fragile, unpredictable.  One never knows how things can change in an instant.

I’m only 57. I feel this is the prime of women’s life.  We know who we are and what we want and don’t take shit from anyone. The most confident time for a women. 

I’m not ready to go. I love my life and have so many things I would still love to do and places to visit.  But I know it’s all in Gods hands. I pray daily for a Little more time.  I cherish each day now and thank Him for giving me one more day.  Only He knows when my time is up. 

If only I knew what day that was.  If only I could have more time.  

I love you all and will say  again how much I appreciate your calls, messages, your prayers, and just reaching out, I’ve never felt more love. Thank you…

Love T

#fuckcancer

#bladdercancersucks

#lovealwayswins

#CANCERSUCKS