Journal entry by Richard Decker —
While we were cuddled watching star trek's next generation,
I chuckled at something Data said,
and Jim's response was 'you're messed up in the head.'
An old version of me would have flared, shut down, moved away. The new we edition thought two things: 1) ask him to elaborate, because right now I deeply care about all the things that Jim says to me + my best friend, confidant, a person who has been so insightful into myself said that 2) just let it go, because I was trying to hard, to laugh at something because for the past two days these waves of pre-loss settle on me and all I want to do is cry, then I surface again and feel how totally fucking wild this is, how special to let go of any of the fear or distracting switchbacks in mind.
The new edition also moved a little closer. Because that's where the less head messed version wants to go. Messed up in the head :)
I chuckled at something Data said,
and Jim's response was 'you're messed up in the head.'
An old version of me would have flared, shut down, moved away. The new we edition thought two things: 1) ask him to elaborate, because right now I deeply care about all the things that Jim says to me + my best friend, confidant, a person who has been so insightful into myself said that 2) just let it go, because I was trying to hard, to laugh at something because for the past two days these waves of pre-loss settle on me and all I want to do is cry, then I surface again and feel how totally fucking wild this is, how special to let go of any of the fear or distracting switchbacks in mind.
The new edition also moved a little closer. Because that's where the less head messed version wants to go. Messed up in the head :)
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