Journal entry by MARI CRUZ DE SAN LUIS REY —
Hello Dad! I just want. you to know that I miss all of you on a daily basis. You don't visit me as often, but thank. you because u usually fill my space with cigarette smoke, and you know how much I hated it when you were alive. Now you have my mom next to you, and I hope you are both getting along well. The other day someone made a comment that you left your other "women" in Portland, Oregon. I truly don't know if I'd be ready to accept a half sister/brother into my life. My little Tobi just passed away on 2-5-23, and it was very sad, because h was loyal till the end. He ended up with brain cancer, and the cancer itself ate up part of his skull. Towards the end, all he did was sleep. I stayed with him as much as possible, and was glad to be with him till the end. I then started dreaming him and my mom a lot. Then came that one day when I knew I would no longer see them in my dreams; it was the most beautiful dream I ever had. Mom, her sisters, and Tobi came to see me, and I could tell Tobi was glad he was coming to see me. My aunts said nothing; they only accompanied my mom. My mom and Tobi looked at me, and when Tobi turned to look at her, she told him, "She's not ready to come with us Tobi. Let's go, but if she doesn't get with the program, we'll come back again." My mom then turned around (along with all my aunts), and said "Let's go Tobi, Mama's going to stay." He turned around and looked so cute as he walked next to my mom, with his little tail wagging back and forth; his pace quick and energetic; and his droopy ears flapping up and down -- my little dog (Yorkie (TeddY)) looked super happy to have seen me. I knew I would not see Tobi in my dreams for a long time. But I do hope to see them both soon. I miss them so much.
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