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Journal

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July
31
2018

There is a giant black hole in the creative world and my life

Patricia passed away around 5 pm today.  My amazing son,  Pat's beautiful brother and I were with her all the way. She squeezed my hand very hard and then passed.  I am devastated  beyond words as Patty and I have been married an known each other for over 40 years. Peace and immeasurable love to my soul mate.

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July
30
2018

Today we need all of your Love

Patty is starting dyalysis right now.  Her blood pressure is very low so our hope isn't at we can get through this today and get her to feel better.  Please send your love to her today.  Will update later.  Peace and love. 

July
30
2018

Very hard day yesterday

Patty's brothers Mark,  Pete and Mary Pat my sister in law came back to the hospital again over the weekend.  Mark is still here and spent the night with Patty.  She is in increasing pain with the plan for both oncologists,  here and at Mayo to talk this morning and agree on a treatment that has been postponed due to Patty's overall condition including her kidney failure.  

I am on my way back out to the Kenosha hospital with the plan to get her admitted to a longer care hospital in Illinois that will allow us to have more involvement with her existing heart and kidney doctors.  Since my current employer eliminated my position recently this has allowed me to spend all of my time with Patty and family to continue to persue a solution to extend and improve her life.  Peace and love to you all.

July
28
2018

From Pat: Thank You!

Dear CaringBridge/GoFundMe donors,

Imagine my surprise when a lung scan that was clear on April 1 showed signs three months later of cancer, detecting a Stage 4 Adrenal Carcinoma. To suddenly be showered with love and support in such a generous helpful way by kind strangers, friends and family like you is overwhelming and so humbling. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Pat

gofundme.com/help-Patricia-Holmes

July
28
2018

3 tough things: Patricia, dyalysis, Dr. Jay Alexander

Dyalysis countinued today and makes for a long hard day for Patty.  

However,  I had an hour long conversation with Patty's brilliant cardiologist,  Jay Alexander who practices out of Lake Forest,  IL and is a big fan of hers.  In 2 minutes he was reviewing her past scans and records as well as the most recent ones from when we were at Mayo last week.  He has some positive thoughts and ideas,  one comment is that the more aggressive and fast moving a cancer tumor is the more it's affected by chemo and other cancer drugs.  He's tough and a fighter just like Patty is.  We have also made the decision to send her to an LTAC Hospital,  which is essentially a lighter version of  a full blown hospital.  This facility is located near her Cardiologist Jay Alexander and her long time brilliant kidney specialist Dr.  Mehta.  This will provide the best environment to get her better,  the opposite of Hospice.  This all made me feel good for a moment today and wanted to share.  More people on our side to fight,  fight,  fight.  Peace and love.  Greg

July
27
2018

More dyalysis

Good morning, 

I can't say enough about Mark Fries,  Peter Fries (Pat's brothers),  Mary Pat Fries,  my son Brandon Holmes and all of the our other relatives and friends who are supporting us.  My mother,  Priscilla Holmes who I was able to finally speak to about this,  commented that I sounded so calm and how am I doing this?  My response was and is that my strength and calmness and focus is through all of you.  I sincerely want all of you to know that my strength is coming from all of you!  I can actually feel your energy and love coming through my mind and body everyday.  There are momemts that I pause during the day and just close my eyes and let all of it take over,  it is all of you who give me the energy to wake up and help Patty fight. Today's fight continues shortly with another round of dyalysis.  Our current plan is to get her back on the chemo meds Monday.  Love and thanks to everyone. Greg 

July
26
2018

Thursday Update

Today, Pat got a permanent port installed to enable better and more consistent medical access to her veins for dialysis and injections. That will help a lot since it reduces risk of infection and will prevent further bruising of her VERY bruised hands and arms. Tomorrow, she will have her sixth dialysis in 9 days, and we are hoping this line of treatment will restart her kidneys so that cancer treatment can finally begin in earnest. We are working on applying for Social Security Disability so that we maximize available financial support.

As Greg posted on CaringBridge this morning, his company informed him yesterday that they are eliminating his position at work, and the family’s sole source of income along with it. Given this, we are increasing our GoFundMe target to $30,000, so that the family can afford COBRA, the mortgage, etc., allowing Greg (and Brandon) to take this opportunity to focus on Pat’s care while considering his next steps. If you are able to provide any funding to support the family, please click on the link below. And a HUGE thank you to all those who’ve contributed over $10,000 so far to Pat’s care. The family is overwhelmed with gratitude and love.

GoFundMe.com/help-Patricia-Holmes

July
26
2018

I am devoted full time to Patricia

Yesterday was a mixed bag as dyalysis for Patty takes much out her physically.  Yesterday my employer Blue Wave Products in St Charles,  Illinois decided to  eliminate my position,  which confirms my strong feelings to never go back to that chaotic world and persue the real and meaningful projects I have already started.  I own the domain name,  Tiny Nest and have decided to have that company focus solely on medical related equipment, such as when chairs,  walkers and other needed products you help those like my wife Patricia navigate a world that is NOT designed for anyone with physical challenges.  Dignity,  style and pride are important and critical to people like Patty and the medical world had done a lousy job by providing archaic,  expensive and improperly designed items.  This is what I will devote my life to,  designing products that are amazing and affordable!  The unbelievably cruel and poorly timed corporate decision to "eliminate my position"  is  a blessing as it will now allow me to care for Patricia and do something important for once that will positively impact the lives of others that do not have all of the physical advantages that I have been blessed with.  Sorry for the longer than usual rant type update but myself and the family decided that this would be a transparent communication portal.  It's going to be a great day. Please take the time to  enjoy the daily gift that we all have in front of us.  Peace and love.  Greg