As today unfolds I will close out parts of my fathers’ life. It is a kind of bitter sweet, as I’m glad he is no longer suffering, but it also means that he’s gone. And all we kids can do is try to figure out what our new ‘normal’ means. No more phone calls, no more visits at the kitchen table or in the garage, no more of the many traditions that we’re all so used to from him. And as Thanksgiving looms around the corner, I’m anxious for the comfort of family, but also dread our ‘first’ without him…the first of many that will come over the next year. Along with all this means ending this…HIS…Caring Bridge site; something I’m dreading more than anything because that means the battle is over, and it makes it sooooo real.
The one good thing is that I feel like we have (and have had) more support than we will ever know!!! The outpouring of love and warmth that we’ve felt from everyone is unbelievable. I just wish that all the ‘stuff’ we had to do over the last week would go away, so that I could get back to each and every one of you with my gratitude and thanks. The thing you don’t count on with death is how unbelievably busy you are. Making arrangements, planning, notifications, purchases, securing things, picking versus/songs/food/venues, looking for those perfect pics…it’s all so overwhelming and incredibly time consuming. It leaves little time for replies to the countless phone calls, texts, messages, and emails.
But it is all of these that I look at, as well as all of the flowers and plants around the house, that keeps me remembering that we’re not alone – no matter how much we feel like we are – and I am thankful for all of the friends and family that are here for us. I just wish I had enough time to get back to every one of you individually with a personal response. Believe me…your prayers, love, and concern have touched David, Eric, and I and mean more than you will know. Once things setting down, you may even find one of us reaching out, or crying on your doorsteps! For now, our heartfelt thanks to everyone who continues to support us during this difficult time. God bless you all!