Palliative care called and I told them what happened and they said to increase my pain meds until I got caught up on the pain. I also spoke with them about the blisters on my lips and in my mouth. I'm going to continue to use the neosporine with pain relief for my lips and they suggested gargling baking soda water for the blisters in my mouth. If that doesn't work they said to use the magic mouthwash that will numb my mouth.
I also called the Cleveland clinic today and got back in with Dr E. I will be seeing him on October 30. I'm praying that they can give me more options. I was having extreme anxiety earlier over this. What if they agree with Dr M? I almost feel like he wants me to give up and just enjoy what little time I have...though I want to believe I have more then a little time... What if they end up agreeing and won't do the experimental treatments we discussed? All because I have side effects that can knock me down. Send me to the hospital even. I'm going to be perfectly honest. I'm a cancer patient taking chemo pills. I never expected a smooth ride. I will do anything to be able and see my babies grow up. Even if it's having side effects that knock me down for a little while. On the good days I will be with my babies and enjoy every moment. I don't want to hide this from them. It's not easy but we're going to get through this as a family...
So like I said at the beginning of my post, I decided this morning that by the end of the day I was going to be walking with the walker and I was! Screw cancer it's not going to get me down like that today... Or ever.
Today was Joey's 11th birthday. I don't know where these 11 years went. Other than having to do homework I think he had a good day. He starts full time school on Monday. I have some anxiety over this but Don and I talked and talked about it and finally decided it was in Joey best interest to do full time school. He learns best in that environment and while Don and I have the time to do homeschool with him, we don't have the energy or patience.
Well, I need to go to bed. My eyes keep shutting on me. Love to you all!